AS: MITB finals

[Patty O'Green 0]

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen... your following contest, set for one fall... is the FINALS of the OAOAST MONEY IN THE BANK TOURNAMENT!! In which, the winner will recieve $500,000 in prize money...

Cut to the side of the ring, where Terry Taylor inexplicably models the suitcase full of bills like a Price Is Right extra.

BUFFER
...and, the opportunity to challenge the OAOAST World's Champion at any time for up to one year! At this time, introducing, finalist number one.

Down go the lights in the arena, to almost dark, save for a couple of roving spotlights scanning the entrance way. In the silence whistles and cheers can be heard from the crowd, eagerly awaiting this marquee match-up. No cheers go up for the cueing of the music though, largely because nobody was expecting to hear 80's power ballad "Shadows Of The Night" right about now. Confusion hangs over the crowd as two bright lights illuminate the rest of the entrance way from above the lone-star shaped big-screen.

"We're running with the Shadows Of The Night
So baby take my hand, you'll be all right
Surrender all your dreams to me tonight
They'll come true in the end"

As the drums kick in, those hoping and expecting yet another new theme song for Krista (and let's be honest, who could blame them?) are sorely disappointed, as it's LANDON MADDIX who walks out through the entrance with his arms raised triumphantly at his sides! Landon soaks in the rocking 80s sounds under the boos ringing through the arena, flanked by Megan Skye who is the only one of the two to show any embarrassment over the new song choice. In his element, Landon does a quick twirl into a dramatic bow before ruffling his hair and marches down to the ring.

COACH
Only Landon Maddix! Only Landon could come out to a song like this!

COLE
Only Landon Maddix WOULD come out to a song like this you mean?

BUFFER
Accompanied to the ring this evening by his 'Perfect 10', MEGAN SKYE! He hails from Huron, South Dakota, by way of Madrid, Spain... weighing in tonight at two hundred and eight pounds. He is the leader of Cucaracha Internacional, the Commissioner of the Smartmarks Wrestling Federation, the former OAOAST Champion of the World... he is LLLLAAAAAAAANNDDDDOOOOOOONN... "LA CUCARACHA"... MMMMAAAAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!!

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

"You said - oh girl
It's a cold world
When you keep it all to yourself"

Landon slows down his walk in accordance with the song, wearing an even bigger smile on his face than usual tonight. Nodding his head he stops in front of maybe the one and only person in the entire city of San Antonio cheering him and shrugs his shoulders, 'humbly' asking that person to save his applause in a show which fools no-one.

"I said you can't hide on the inside
All the pain you've ever felt"

Of course the rest of the fans lined down the aisleway are all giving him the thumbs down, or other fingers up, so he quickly veers away from the barricade and back to his usual source of support, Megan Skye.

"Ransom my heart, but baby don't look back
Cause we got nobody else!"

Grabbing Megan around the shoulders, Landon can contain himself no longer and sings along at the top of his lungs, fist clenching, arm pumping, feeling the power of the ballad take over him!

"We're running with the Shadows of the Night
So baby take my hand, you'll be all right
Surrender all your dreams to me tonight
They'll come true in the end"

COLE
Landon clearly in fine form here tonight at AngleSlam. And you couldn't blame him for being extra confident, after the debacle that was that 'debate' this past Thursday night on HeldDOWN~! The sneak attack by the members of Cucaracha Internacional on Krista, who was driven through that podium by the monstrous Faqu, before Landon delivered the Go To Sleep and scored a phony pinfall. Completely unneccessary from all concerned.

COACH
Hold up, what do you mean 'phony pinfall'? Did he pin Krista for a 1, 2, 3 or not?

COLE
Well he did...

COACH
Exactly.

COLE
But first of all, it wasn't a referee counting. And second of all, we don't know that Krista wouldn't have kicked out if she had to. The fact remains Krista has never been pinned in one on one [i]competition[/i] in her long OAOAST career and if you're seriously going to count that sham last week as a pinfall, then... well, then I guess I shouldn't be surprised. But you shouldn't, that's the point.

Climbing up the ring steps Landon saunters down the apron, waiting for Megan to sit herself across the middle rope to hold it open. And, just as importantly, waiting for his music to catch up with him, before bounding into the ring, spinning triumphantly with arms out-stretched in as grand a gesture as possible.

"We're running with the Shadows of the Night
So baby take my hand, you'll be all right
Surrender all your dreams to me tonight
They'll come true in the end"

COLE
It's usually Krista who makes the grand entrances come Pay Per View nights. I think even she's going to be able to match the grand, over the top energy of Landon. Which is kinda scary when you think about it.

Landon is disrobed of his trenchcoat and begins to warm up.

BUFFER
And introducing his opponent...

Excitement is renewed now, as all eyes turn to the entrance way. Stood across from each other stand two cowboy costumed cowgirls in a heated face-off. Turning back to back, they step out ten paces before reaching into the holsters around their waist, turning... and just then the smooth yet funky synthesized melodies of MGMT's Electric Feel kicks in and the cheers grow ever louder as the fans rise to their feet.

"Shock me like an electric eel
baby girl
turn me on with your electric feel

Ooh girl
shock me like an electric eel
baby girl
turn me on with your electric feel"

The entrance stage is buried in a harmonious, almost sensual and enigmatic turquoise light. Silver sparkling snow begins to lightly rain down from the ceiling, glittering beautifully in the lighting. Out from the back comes Krista, dressed in a ruffled pink ballgown and looking shocked at the gunfight about to erupt. She shrieks for the cow'boy's to quit their fighting, because there's plenty of this fair maiden to go around! Discarding their guns, the two women rush over and embrace Krista, before simultaneously tearing away the ballgown to reveal Krista's wrestling attire, which is only a little more suitable and traditional than a ballgown to be fair. More girls jog out, all dressed like extras from a Preston Sturgis movie. The girls then perform a seductive hoedown (never thought I'd be typing those words) around Krista.

COLE
I can't believe I ever doubted Krista was toppable.

Standing at the height of the stage, at the center of everyone's attention, Krista Isadora Duncan is handed a martini by one of her dancers dressed in a bartender's costume and she raises it in salute to her dancers before downing it in one. Unfortunately the bartender dancer was only supplied with one martini and it looks like Krista might find use for the discarded guns for a second.

BUFFER
And the opponent... from Los Angeles, California! She is a best selling author, a fitness queen, an inductee into The Hollywood Walk of Fame and star of the world famous FIT with KID line of exercise videos, the star of the VH1 reality show the look of love, the Angle Award winning female personality of the year... she is "MISS CALIFORNIA"... KKRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSTTAAAAAAAA... IIIIIISSSSSAAAAAAAAADDOOOORRRRRRRRAAAAAA... DDUUUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAAAANN!!!!

"YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

Leaving the Texas themed insanity behind her Krista marches down the aisle, already casting an icy glare towards Landon.

COLE
One thing we've come to realise here in the OAOAST... making Krista angry is rarely, if ever, a wise thing to do.

COACH
I think last week proved, the Krista we once knew isn't the same Krista. The Krista we've come to realise stuff from wouldn't have been pinned on Thursday night, would she?

COLE
Okay, I can see you're going to keep dwelling on that so let's change the subject and remind everybody, this is for $500,000 of Theodore Moneymaker's own money and the Money In The Bank World Title contract. Plus of course, 15% of Theodore Moneymaker's TSM shares in the offering should Landon defeat Krista, which he says he will use to get the SWF back on television. Huge stakes in this first time match-up, and with these two involved this should certainly be some spectacle.

Krista's legs glide across the apron, then attach themselves to the third rope. She bends herself backwards to the audience's delight, showing the dexterity to still flip the camera off before levering herself gracefully into the ring. Landon watches all of this from a seated position on the turnbuckles, with the nerve to accuse Krista of milking her entrance too much.

COLE
Pot, Kettle, Cucaracha.

Jumping down from the ropes Landon goes over strategy one last time with Megan before she's moved out of the ring.

"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"
"KRIS - TA!"

COLE
This crowd in San Antonio right behind Krista from the get-go, as we get ready for this historic tournament final.

*DINGDINGDING!*

Even with sixty thousand screaming fans firmly standing against him, and a foe firing off a stare that could pierce through steel, Landon is as arrogant and obnoxious as ever. Fluffing his shaggy hair, he struts to Krista with his mouth twisted into a smirk.

“I pinned you on HeldDOWN~!” He begins, not phased by Krista's hateful glare “I pinned you and I had a three hundred pound man ram your head through a wooden podium at that. You got any comeback for that, Sara Silverman? That's a comedian right? I think so. Yeah, ya got any come back for that, Sara Silverman?”

“Well, honey, I do have this...” Krista trails off innocently and then not so innocently uses her teeth to peel the skin right off Landon's nose! As the fans let loose a monstrous roar, Landon himself lets loose one as well, only his is scream is caused by a horrific pain.

“Virgin Mary in a strip club! You bit me!” He shouts, covering his nose and cowering away from Krista. 

Krista puts on her most sickeningly sweet smile “What did you expect me to do?”

“Compliment me on my ingenious scheme or fine choice of new entrance music. Or maybe just slap me?”

“Oh, honey, and mess up my French tips? Never!”

Having had enough of talking with Landon for the moment, Krissy latches onto his arm and throws him into the ropes. He bounces off the cables, and as he returns he leaps forward and raises both his knees to strike her. But Miss California is far quicker than Mister South Dakota, and surprises him with a Lou Thez press. Together they crash into the ground, with the audience loudly rooting on the former OAOAST tag champ.

While being mounted by Krista might be a pleasurable position most of the time, its certainly not one currently as she goes back to feasting on what's left of his nose! Maddix's throat pours out shrill shrieks of agony, that are hardly heard over the cheering of the fans. He tries his damndest to remove the vampric babe, but such resistance only makes her more inclined to bite harder.

COLE
I'm going to guess Landon is probably regretting pissing Krista off at this moment.

Krista finally dismounts Maddix, and chuckles softly. La Cucaracha doesn't find quite the amusement as she does and complains to senior referee Clem Buzzlefoxer about Krista's foray into cannibalism. 

“You daft idiot! You're standing two feet away from us! Do you not see her gnawing on my nose? Are you legally blind?”

“Yes.” The 86 year old referee bemoans, and Maddix just sort of frowns, humiliated.

“This has been lessons in being a dickhead with Landon Maddix. Up next [i]How To Break Your Shoe Off In Landon Maddix's ass and still keep your girlish charm[/i] with celebrity fitness guru Krista Isadora Duncan” She comments. To further aggravate her short tempered rival, she begins clicking her heels against the canvas, and urging him on like a Matador. Already snarling like an enraged bull, the Spaniard needs no further invitation and charges her. However, Miss California gracefully slides out the way and Maddix goes zooming past. He stamps his black leather boots on the mat in frustration, which only grows worse when he sees Krista bow to an adoring audience! Once again the GLAAdiator waves him on, and once again Landon charges on.  But he's foiled a second time by Krissy's fancy footwork, and the Hollywood starlet bows to the fans once more. In an unusual act for her, Krista notices Landon's fierce glower, and feels a modicum of sympathy for him.

“Honey, I'm sorry! It was wrong of me to play into sterotypes of the Spanish by doing a matador bit with you.  If it makes you feel any better, why don't you just throw a quarter on the ground and I'll pick it up and you can call me a cheap Jew.”

“I'd think I'd get a little more satisfaction out of beating you for the Money In The Bank contract.”

“And I'd get a little more satisfaction out of having your girlfriend in a whipped cream bikini in my bedroom, but we've got to be realistic. Now hurry up and give me my quarter, you lazy Italian!” 

“I'm Spanish, and anyway, I'm not listening to you!” Landon remarks to himself as much as to Krista and then darts at his rival. Krista casually scoots out of the way of his advance and watches with bemusement as he slams into the ring posts., wondering why he charged her when she wasn't doing the matador bit anymore. Putting that issue aside, Krista's long legs carry her towards Landon and her knee is implanted directly into his jaw. Maddix offers a low moan of misery, but the covergirl barely notices he's even there as she's too concerned with fixing her hair after noticing a few loose strands in the video screen. Once she's assured that she's ready for a Panteen commercial, she tucks her knees into Maddix's chest and monkey flips him towards the center of the ring! But, La Cucaracha comes down on his boots, albeit slightly off balance. That doesn't stop the SWF and OAOAST's resident egomaniac from celebrating though, as he points to his noggin to let the audience know how smart he is. His claims of intelligence are quickly refuted as Krista shocks him with a running face crusher, that plants his sore nose into the canvas!

[color="#FF0000"][font="Arial Black"]“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” [/font][/color]

Face down on the canvas, Maddix moans about Krista's usage of the face crusher, not an illegal move, but with a near broken nose, minor things like rules hardly apply. Yawning with apathy, Krista's laidback Californian accent responds, “Get up, Little Maddy. Why do you care if I take a few inches off your pig nose? You're an oink and a curly tail away from the lead role in the next Babe movie. If this SWF thing doesn't work out, and I don't know why a direct to DVD wrestling promotion possibly wouldn't, you can always try the county fairs.”

“I'm not listening to you, you vapid bimbo!” Landon shouts.

“If you win you'll get a blue ribbon.” 

COLE
Why did you make her mad, Landon? 

Not exactly keen on the idea of working the county fair circuit, the SWF boss leaps to his feet. Krista pounces him by slashing her heels against his shin, and then spinning through the air to blast him in the stomach. The wind knocked out of him, Maddix  goes staggering backwards. But, Krista catches onto his wrist and attempts to hurl him into the corner. La Cucaracha shifts his body weight and reverses the hold to send Miss California rushing to turnbuckles. She hits the corner posts with such  impact, that she flips through the air and winds up situated on top the ring posts. So dazed by that nauseating trip up the posts, she fails to notice her foe sprinting to her position. When she does become aware of his location, its too late for her to react, and he spring boards off the ropes and blasts her in the face with a dropkick. She's tossed from the turnbuckles and sent flying through the air, a trip that comes to a violent end when she crashes to the mats. The Alamo Dome gasps in horror as they watch Krista lie motionless on the mat.  Landon just leans over the ropes and stares her with evil beady eyes. 

“I'm earning my five hundred thousand tonight! That had to be at least a ten thousand dollar dropkick right there.” He boastfully remarks, as he exits the ring and positions himself on the ring steps. He motions for Krista to get to her feet. But quickly losing patience, he attacks her with a leaping forearm as she reaches her knees. Krista sags back to the ground, besieged with terrible pain. Pleased with that blow, Maddix announces to no one in particular that it was a twenty thousand dollar forearm. 

[color="#FFA500"][b]“LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS!”[/b][/color]

Landon grabs their heroine by her golden blond hair and leads her upright. He deposits her limp figure into the ring, and then follows her inside. As Landon returns to the ring, Krissy begins a slow trip upright. But whatever threat she may have posed him is immediately neutralized by four stiff kicks to her legs.

COACH
Those legs are insured for ten million dollar, man. You mess with those you gonna have to rob the money in the bank when those dudes from Lloyds of London come knocking on your door step.

Weakened by Landon's unrelenting assault, Krista is unable to prevent him from taking hold of her slender waist and shoving her into the corner. As she hits the ring posts an “oomph” is forced out her bubble gum pink lips, and a smile is forced onto Landon's who deems that a two thousand dollar attack. He then attacks her bare stomach, hitting her with with all the might in his lean body. But as a fitness queen, Krista's six packed stomach could deflect bullets, and Landon's attacks as furious as they may be, are only minor annoyances. Megan realizes this rather quickly, and informs Landon. But ever the stubborn one, the pride of Madrid has to strike her two more times before discovering he's having hardly any affect. Angered by the fact that she's not an obese slob with a soft stomach, Landon pulls her away from the ropes in order to terrorize her with a trio of knees that strike against her face. Miss California whimpers in distress which causes her tormentor to feign tears and then burst out laughing.  

[color="#8B0000"][b]“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!”[/b][/color]

COLE
You probably shouldn't attack Krista's face, unless you just like living in mortal fear for the rest of your adult life. Then go right ahead and enjoy using handicap parking till your dying day.

Perhaps heeding Cole's wise advice, Maddix spins behind Krista and coils his arms around her sexy stomach in a waistlock. As La Cucaracha tries to bring her up for a German Suplex, the bombshell steadfastly fights against her clutches. Yet its obvious to her she won't be able to combat his strength forever, thus other measures are required. Thus she begins grinding and rubbing her her firm round tush against his crotch. All thoughts of a German suplex are erased as her luscious BUTT sends a tidal wave of pleasure washing over him. 

COACH
Damn! Landon better pack heat and roll with the Nation of Islam anytime he's backstage around one of D*LUX, 'cause those dudes just lost their shit!

Reduced into a drooling primate in dire need of a new change of tights and some tissues, Landon is unable to maintain his grip and Krista effortlessly busts free. She whips around to his front, and with a hand on his shoulder brings him down with a jaw breaker! Maddix remains upright, but goes teetering backwards, his vision swimming from the violent force of the move. Because of his mangled sight, he can't prevent Krista from lacing her ten million dollar legs around his neck and hurling him over with a frankensteiner! Landon's head rings louder than a cathedral bell and he's sent skidding across the canvas, to the fans immense pleasure. Despite this crash landing, the silver tongued Spaniard is quick to get back upright. Unfortunately, his feisty enemy is quick to pounce on him; she leaps into him with her knees pressed against his chest for the [b]KIDology[/b] (codebreaker)! The audience is ready to explode with monstrous cheers for her finisher, but Landon snuffs out their joy, by falling backwards and using his hold on her slender hips to fling her to the ropes. The crowd's delight turns to worry then finally back to delight as they watch the lithe beauty land with her feet placed firmly on the ropes.

COLE
Krista going for that move that eliminated Leon Rodez!

[color="#FF8C00"][b]“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!”[/b][/color]

“Hey, I did that all in high heels, that's damn impressive. I'm gonna need a little more than a loudly stated well synchronized reminder of what my name is.”
[color="#FFA500"]
[font="Arial Black"]“ALL HAIL KRISTA! ALL HAIL KRISTA! ALL HAIL KRISTA!”[/font][/color]

Satisfied with being recognized as royalty, her highness flings herself backwards at Maddix with a lionsault. La Cucaracha is well prepared for her arrival and ducks beneath her ascending body. But yet again, she frustrates him beyond all belief by having a safe landing on her heels. The audience is ready to praise their queen, but she kindly informs them that won't be necessary. But the fans soon lose any reason to feel happy as Maddix shocks Miss California and captures her on his shoulders in a standing fireman's carry. Knowing full well what lies ahead, the sold out arena gets to its feet and bombards the former SWF World Champion with venomous boos.

“All hail, Landon Maddix!” He shouts. “All hail the ten time SWF World Champion!”

“Its only four times, Landon.” Megan corrects.

“Shut up, they don't know that!” He whines. Unable to take his anger out on Megan, as that would be spousal abuse, Maddix takes it out on Krista, throwing her off his shoulder and raising his knee for the Go 2 Sleep! However its La Cucaracha who's nearly knocked into an eternal slumber, as Krista snakes her arms around his neck and smashes his head into the canvas with a crowd pleasing DDT! Assailed by a pounding headache, Maddix remains on the ground, urging the elderly referee to reward him the contest by virtue of the fact that he's never voted for cutbacks on Medicaid. 

COLE
Landon Maddix was only a knee lift away from getting the SWF back on live TV and repeating as Mister Money In The Bank! If you have Krista set up for the kill you have got to finish. 

[color="#FFA500"][b]“LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS!”[/b][/color]

The audience behind Krista are given a rear view worth well more than a half a million, as Krista bends over and awaits Maddix's rise from the canvas. To bide the time she twirls imaginary guns like a wild west slinger. Fortunately, Landon rises and the miming needn't last long and Krista scorches towards him with her second KIDology attempt!
[color="#FF0000"]
[font="Arial Black"]“YEAAAAAAAA!”[/font][/color]

But Maddix catches onto her legs and violently shoves her back to the ground, a forceful counter that even sends him teetering backwards to the ropes.

[color="#F4A460"][font="Arial Black"]“BOOOOOOO!”[/font][/color]

Crumbled in a heap and tormented by an agonized back, Krista is easy pickings for Maddix. He smiles broadly as he hooks onto her legs and leaps through them for a jack knife pin. Buzzlefoxer drops to his arthritic knee (and one fake leg!) to make the count...

ONE!

TWO!

Krista's shoulder comes off the canvas, thrilling the audience, while aggravating Maddix to no end. He complains to the official, pulsing anger creeping into his voice. But he manages to calm his issues with the referee enough to return his focus to Krista. He batters her with stomps to her sore back, delighting in her every cry that his attacks generate. Unable to endure the mounting pain he brings her, she rolls across the ring floor in small hopes of making an escape. Maddix is merciless and hounds her with stomps targeted at her back. He determines he's done enough to weaken her with simple strikes and decides to move onto more deadly attacks. Thus, with a grip on the back of her vest dress he lifts her off the canvas. But just as quickly as he lifted her up does he put her back down, courtesy of a lung blower. Krista bounces off his knees onto the mat and bawls her pain, drawing worried expressions onto the spectators' faces.

COACH
Landon invited me out to his victory dinner, and call me Gustav because I'ma make rain on these hos! I'm gonna order me Aussie Cheese Fries with ranch dressing and fried onions.

COLE
I don't think that's a good idea, Doctor Doris Carnnes said that's America's least healthiest food.

COACH
I ain't gonna let no bitch tell me what to eat! And a female doctor? You think cause you give a woman a book instead of havin her cook you a meal or wash your feet that makes her a doctor?  Just cause you teach a monkey to wipe its ass don't mean what's on the toilet paper ain't shit! 

La Cucaracha brings Krista to her feet and rocks her jaw with a spinning back fist. The blow packs enough punch to floor the starlet, but Maddix keeps her upright with a front facelock. He brings Krista into the skies, then punishes her by dropping her directly onto her head. As she lies face down onto the canvas, he follows that up with a twisting leg drop onto the back of her skull.

[color="#FF0000"][font="Arial Black"]“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!”[/font][/color] the fans try to rally their heroine. Drawing strength from their support, Krista regains her footing. But she can't offer them the flurry of offense they've been begging for as Maddix is quick to keep her weak with straight kicks to the back. He then forces Krista onto his shoulders in the all too familiar fireman's carry hold. Inching closer to the ropes, he showcases his beautiful victim to the wrathful audience, before finally slinging her off his slim shoulders and rifling his knee towards her face! Unwilling to see any harm done to her moneymaking appearance, Krista shifts her body in midair and totally avoids Landon's finisher. The audience goes wild with glee, but Landon is paralyzed in utter shock at missing his Go 2 Sleep.

Now its Krista's time for revenge, and she gets it in the most pain inducing way possible, shredding Landon's skin with a vile knife edge chop.

“AHHHHHH!” Landon yells, the pain almost bringing him to his knees. “God bless America, don't do that!”

“Why not?”

“I had a pectoral tendon rupture when I was in grade school and a bully hung me on the monkey bars by my nipples, and I've never gotten over it.  You don't wanna be like these other jerks who keep chopping me to hurt me. That's what wrestlers do. You're better than that. You're a celebrity. Stay classy, baby.”

Krista thinks it over for a moment, “Gee, honey, even for a guy who openly boasts about being the commissioner of a direct to DVD independent wrestling promotion without any hint of irony, you suck a lot more than I thought. But very well, Little Maddy, I won't hit your poor widdle chest.”

[B]LIES[/B]

“SAY *CHOP* YOUR *SORRY* FOR *CHOP* PUTTING *CHOP* ME *CHOP* THROUGH *CHOP* THE PEW *CHOP*” There's a moments pause as the audience enthusiastically celebrates her beating, and Krista continues “SORRY *CHOP* I *CHOP* MEANT “*CHOP* PODIUM *CHOP* NOT *CHOP* PEW* *CHOP*!

“Owwww” Landon moans, his cry coming out as little more than faint choking sound.

“OWWWW? *CHOP* WHO *CHOP* THE *CHOP*  FUCK *CHOP* IS *CHOP* THIS *CHOP* OWWW *CHOP* BITCH *CHOP* FUCK *CHOP* YO *CHOP* MOTHERFUCKIN *CHOP* CHEST *CHOP* WHITEBOY! I'LL *CHOP* CHOP *CHOP* THE *CHOP* MEXICAN *CHOP* OUTTA *CHOP* YOU *CHOP* BITCH!”

“I...I...I'm Spanish.” Maddix whines, instantly regretting.

“YOU'LL *CHOP* BE *CHOP* GOD DAMN *CHOP* KLINGON *CHOP* IF *CHOP*  A *CHOP*  BITCH *CHOP* SAYS *CHOP* YOU *CHOP* ARE!”

COLE
Landon said things would be different here at Angleslam, but he all but sealed this fate in the closing minutes of HeldDOWN~! Why oh why did you ever piss her off, La Cucaracha?

Finally, Krista relents, and Landon is left to hear the raucous ovation fans instead of the sound of his skin being mutilated. As agony gnaws at his chest, his opponent takes off to the ropes. He lowers his head, hoping that she'll simply leapfrog him. This proves to be a profoundly stupid tactic, as Krista just rifles her foot into his chest. Maddix rockets back upright, as excruciating pain plays on his facial features. That's the perfect look for Krista, and the walk of famer leaps into his chest for another KIDology effort. The audience, who were ready to toast to a KID victory, are sorely disappointed when Maddix once again brushes her away from him. Their disgust is tempered somewhat when they see her come down on her heels. And that disgust is totally evaporated as those heels blast Landon in his chest with a dropsault. Krissy again lands on her feet, and further wows the audience by twisting into a standing shooting star press that nearly caves in Landon's chest. Krista then blows the audience a kiss. Ain't that sweet?

[color="#FFA500"][b]“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!”[/b][/color] the crowd sings as she covers Landon for a pinfall

ONE!

TWO!

Landon lifts his shoulders off the canvas, and the audience douses him with boos. Krista throws a nasty glare at Buzzlefoxer for a slightly slow count. Fortunately Clem is half blind, otherwise he might be a tad worried that Krista is planning on bringing his long life to a short end.

COLE
If Krista hit that KIDology I have to believe that not only would she pin Landon for the Money In The Bank contract with how weak his chest is, she'd probably shoot his heart straight out his back and all the way to Mars.

Krista is back on her feet, making sure she hasn't got any of Landon's blood on her bright white heels. Guarding his chest like he's bundling a baby, Maddix slowly steps upright. The moment he reaches his feet Krista grabs onto his arm and launches him into the ropes.  As he returns, the arrogant superstar is leapfrogged by the arrogant celebrity. Maddix skids to a halt, thinking he can capture Krista unaware with the Landon Eye. Unfortunately his plan goes up in brilliant flames as Krista executes an inverted atomic drop to his nether regions. Eager to show he's well endowed in that area, Landon screams as though he just got stabbed with an ice pick. Krista attempts to silence his wailing with the thundering superkick that completes Krista's Great California Adventure.  But, Mister Money In The Bank recovers from his man pain just in time to catch hold of her boot. This does not please Krissy in the slightest.

“Honey, these are eight hundred ninety five dollar pumps, if I find a single one of your little paw prints on them I'll have you in Afghanistan picking opium for a Taliban drug lord by day and working the Thailand prostitute circuit by night. I can do that, my dad's in congress.”

Landon calls Krista's bluff, and while she doesn't have him working the streets of Bangok just yet, she does scramble his brains with an enziguri. Face drained off all life, La Cucaracha flips over onto the mat. With his chest exposed he's left perfect victim for the high angle double knee drop Krista drives into his chest. As Landon whimpers and the crowd cheers, Krista tries another pinfall...

ONE!

TWO!

Landon keeps the SWF's dreams of a return to television prominence alive with a kickout. He's quickly back to his feet and tries to repay Krista for his earlier anguish with a chop to her ample chest. But the 
attack does nothing but leave Landon hypnotized by the boobie jiggliation he's just caused.  

“Try it again!” Terry shouts in a Mickey Mouse voice so as Krista won't embalm him latter.

Assuring Megan that he's acting strictly on athletic motivators, he retries his effort to same gravity defying results. A delighted smile (and a few other things) rise and he winds up to send her betties bouncing. But  Krista takes advantage her mesmerizing breasts to hook her arms around his neck in preparation for The Blonds Never Pay a Cover (Side Effect). She drives him down into the canvas, to a large pop from the fans. Maddix hurriedly stands back up only to be captured by the sight of her jiggling jumbos and then by a second side effect!  Back to his feet and she tries to give a taste of Life In The Fab lane. However, without bouncing breasts to distract him, he has her number and counters her twist of fate efforts by driving her onto her neck with a Northern lights suplex.  Maddix gives himself delighted applause for his “achievement”, a gesture that's returned by absolutely no one, not even Megan.  
[color="#FFA500"]
[b]“LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS!”[/b][/color] is the annoying message he hears as he makes his way towards the turnbuckles. Informing the audience that he'll make certain their cable boxes are banned from receiving the new SWF Tv show, La Cucaracha heads up top. He crouches on his nest, impatiently waiting for Krista to rise off again. Only when she does just that, he's vexed even further as Krissy complains of missing a contact. 

“You don't even wear cont...”

Maddix's words trail off into an amazed stammering brought on by Krista's splendid bouncing BUTT. His head swims and his every nerve tingles with rapture as her buns of steel beautifully writhe and pulse just inches from his widened eyes.

[color="#FF0000"][b]“YEAAAAAAAA!”[/b][/color]

COLE
Page 142 Chapter 7 Line 17 of KID 101: How To Be Darned Fabulous and Make Truckloads of Money  In The Process reads-”You will look at my curvy BUTT” 

Reduced to a blubbering, and very aroused mess, Landon doesn't have the sense to notice that Krista's booty grinding has been cut short and she's closing in on him with bull rush speed.  Within seconds she scales to the top turnbuckles and her knees go into his chest for a lethal top rope KIDology! But, thanks to many panicked screams from Megan, Landon rejoins us in reality, and catches Krista's body within his arms. The audience gasps in panic, that worsens considerably as they watch La Cucaracha shift her onto his shoulders in a fire man's carry position. 

COLE
A top rope Go 2 Sleep? That's what put out Christian Wright in the first round!

COACH
My man took out Moneymaker's best friend in the first round, and he gonna do the job on his worst enemy in the finals! 

“Holla atcha boy, I gets money!” Landon screams to a horribly humiliated groan from Megan.

Landon rises and so to does the booing of the Texans. He flashes them an evil grin before leaping forward and trying to swing Krista off his shoulders. That's when his plan goes array as Krista snakes her arms across his neck and pulverizes it against the canvas with an inverted DDT! The mood of the fans instantly shifts and they pour out a sustained roar for her counter.
[color="#FFA500"]
[font="Arial Black"]“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!”[/font][/color]

COACH
Damn, damn! If that'd hit Landon would've made history, Mikey. Two time Money In The Bank winner, first person to pin Krista one on one, and the man who got the SWF back on television with Da Coach lending his hip urban yet sophisticated style to their commentary booth.

That incredible counter seems to have drained even more energy from Krista than Landon, as the Los Angeles native lies against the turnbuckle trying desperately to regain her fleeting breath. Thankfully there's minimal pressure put on her by Maddix, who has dragged his battered bones to the outside. He tries to discuss strategy with Megan, but given recent events is forced to explain to her that he's a man and he has needs. The subject of their bickering finally stirs, and advances onto the ring apron. This goes unnoticed by Maddix who screams like a child when she ambushes him with a flying forearm!

COLE
You do know the SWF has an announce team already correct?

COACH
Man, to hell with those no name herbs. Da Coach does it real b-i-g style. ESPN, WWF, OAOAST, I bring swagtastic magic wherever I may roam. Plus, I get away from you, and get paid handsomely to do so.

Krista traces her tongue around her luscious red lips at Megan , and with her boyfriend still doing his childlike wailing, that's an offer The Perfect 10 seriously considers. Giving Megan some time to mull it over, KID grabs onto Maddix's stringy hair and guides him towards the Lithuanian (!) announce table. Her intention is to introduce his skull to hard wood, a meeting Landon wants no part of. Thus he overpowers her grip, and before she can fight back he throws [i]her[/i] into the table. The audience boos as they see Krista's anguished face magnified on the big screen. Landon, however, is more than thrilled, and fluffs his hair in triumph.

COLE
You don't have to like Landon Maddix, I'm not even sure Megan does, but you have to admit he's as resilient, smart, and sneaky as any superstar in sports entertainment. 

Maddix strides forward with a confident swagger and snares Krista into a front facelock. He pulls her limp body away from the table, and with a hook onto her mini skirt, lifts her into the air. There's short pause by La Cucaracha to let the fans register her impending doom. Then he slams her stomach first across the announce table, sending the announcers scattering, and the fans recoiling in horror. Krista goes skidding off the table to the vacated chairs. They provide very minimal cushion but not enough for her preferences and they quickly dump her to the floor that feels so cold against her bare skin.

“How are those six hundred dollar heels now, honey?” Landon snorts. “Oh, excuse me, honey, I meant  eight hundred, how rude of me, honey!” 

Krista is in serious pain, and what would normally be grounds for murder, being mocked, is met with a weak grunt of defiance that Landon can barely hear. Back to fluffing his hair, Landon merrily skips to behind the announce desk where Krista's agony paints a picture of sadistic glee on his face. With his fingers wrapped through her golden hair, he scrapes her off the floor and leads her out in front of the table. He winds up, ready to deliver a knock out blow, but as his fist heads towards Krista she blocks it with a forearm. Wild cheers fill the arena, as Krista begins ripping apart his chest with knife edge chops! But the bliss of the audience is frustratingly short lived as Maddix ends her comeback with a rake of her bright blue eyes.

[color="#FFA500"][b]“LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS! LANDON SUCKS!”[/b][/color]

COACH
Like you said, he's resilient and he's smart!

COLE
He's also a cheap dirty bastard!

As Krista is momentarily blinded she has no defense from Landon scooping her into the standing fireman's carry. The fans again go ballistic in booing for the G2S. But, Landon shocks them all by doing something far more deadly than his famous finisher; he throws Krista forward and lets her neck snap off the edge of the announce table! Krista's head spins, the blood pounds in her ears, and she lets out a heart wrenching shriek as she falls to the floor.

COLE 
A modified G2S onto the announce table! What lengths won't this man go to win?

COACH
Why shouldn't he? He's got a half a million dollars waiting, a company depending on him, and a guaranteed world title shot. I'm out here trying to show the youngsters not to love these ho's, and you catching feelings off a lesbian bitch. That's foul.

Adrenaline is pumping through Landon's body, and pure energy stalks him about the outside. Feeling nearly invincible, he shoves a camera guy out the way and climbs the ring steps to proclaim “You are in the presence of greatness! Bask in it, people! Bask in it!”

[color="#FF8C00"][font="Arial Black"]“YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!”[/font] [/color]

Pain wracked and possibly concussed, Krista doesn't even think to fight back against Maddix as he drags her off the mats. He uses her mini skirt as a leash as he walks past hateful crowd members around the ring. Upon reaching his destination, he chucks KID into the steel steps. Her head crashes into the metal, and the pain is greater than any she's felt all match. Though she's possibly in need of medical attention, Maddix refuses to offer her a second to recuperate. He grabs back onto her skit and leads her off the mat. She sags within his grip, hardly having the strength to stay upright. She doesn't need to stand much longer however, as her rival throws her head into the steps once more. As she falls back to the ground the pain becomes so great she can no longer fashion sounds, and only croaks softly. Amused beyond all right by his carnage, Landon mocks Krista's vanity by checking himself out in an imaginary compact mirror.

COLE
For our SWF viewers watching this on Prelude To Grandeur I just want to assure you that not all of our referees are senile narcoleptic twits incapable of performing a countout and a disqualifcation. Only six of them are.

Krista is shoved back into the ring by La Cucaracha. He buries his boot in the back of her head, then watches entertained as she struggles in vain  to get to her feet. After she sinks back to the canvas, defeated by her misery, he rushes in and drops an elbow onto her head. The fans spew venom at him, which causes him to lean through the ropes and smile as disingenuous a smile as his lips can possibly form.

COLE
Why do I never fail to be disgusted and annoyed with Landon Maddix?

COACH
'Cause you a bitch, duke.

Nails dug into the mat, Krista crawls across the ring. She has no clue where she's going, but only knows that movement is the only thing that keeps her conscious. But, La Cucaracha stops her dead in her tracks with another running elbow to the head. As the pain from that blow sends shockwaves through her head, she wants to pass out. But, she's held awake by Landon sitting on top of her and holding her weary face out towards a booing crowd.

“Awww what's the matter, Krista? Why so glum? Your mascara running?” Landon asks then chuckles to Megan.

[font="Arial Black"][color="#FF0000"]“LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA!”[/color][/font]

Maddix picks Krista up, and uses her vibrant hair as a leash to lead her to the corner. His plan is to use the posts to beat her into an early retirement. But Krista blocks his first attempt, and draws a mighty cheer form the fans as she hammers Maddix's face into the posts. Enraged that he would even consider touching her supermodel features, she brutally ravages his visage against the ring posts. The only thing that stops her is a warning from the suddenly awake senior referee. Not bothering to argue with Clem, Krista rushes to the ropes, timing her return to catch Landon as he stumbles out the corner. Her ten million dollar legs leap into his chest in another try for the KIDology. But, Maddix is again up to task, and recovers enough of his strength to spine buster her to the ground!

[b][color="#F4A460"]“BOOOOOO”[/color][/b]hisses the audience as a hair fluffing Landon struts across the ring before coming back to assail Krista's head with his latest elbow drop. Assured that Krista's been sufficiently pummeled, he hooks her leg for what he dubs a “$500,000  pinfall”

ONE!

TWO!

But, Krista somehow manages the strength she needs to kickout!

[color="#FFA500"][b]“YEAAAAAA!”[/b]
[/color]
COACH
Landon is so close, Mikey, so close to doing the [i]unpredictable[/i] and defeating Krista Isadora Duncan. And who better to do it than him, the only man to hold both the SWF and OAOAST world championships?

Maddix crouches over, eying down Krista with predatory intent, waiting for her to stand so he can strike. She rises weakly, unaware of the vicious maneuver the SWF Commissioner has in store for her. He exposes her to his master pla, by jumping into her with a front facelock and bringing her down with a body scissors. Hisses and jeers come down from every corner of the arena, as Landon loudly announces Krista imminent submission.

COLE
Wet Cement! Wet Cement!

“Or Grand Theft Taamo” Megan remarks, confusing Cole and anyone's who never read an SWF show.

Krista wants to clutch her head, her pounding ears, to punch Maddix, anything that will drive this ruinous pain out her skull. Her body is shot through with paralyzing agony, and almost as though he can sense it, Maddix breaks out with a demented smile. He looks almost satanic smiling that smile that grows wider as Krista's eyes explode in pain. 
[color="#FF0000"]
[font="Arial Black"]“LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA!”[/font][/color]

“Tap! Tap, woman, tap!” Maddix screams.

Landon's words of discouragement are drowned out by the sixty thousand in the crowd, urging Miss California to find the strength needed to break free of her foe's grip. But all she does is gasp and gurgle as Maddix's hold grows ever tighter.

COLE
We all know Krista's never lost a one on one match in her life, but she's never submitted period. Landon is a tap out away from two historic firsts and a guaranteed world title opportunity! 

Krista lies there gasping her every breath labored, each one coming harder than the one before it. Her head feels as though it were on fire, and her pulse thuds through her ears. Even with all this mounted against her, and Maddix begging her to submit, Krista hasn't lost the will to continue to fight. Her hands are free, and they hammer Landon's face with every ounce of strength they can possibly muster. At first they do little more than just give the depressed fans something to cheer for. But, as both of Landon's arms are occupied with her head, they soon begin to do damage to the Spanish import.

“LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA!” the chants are more enthusiastic than before, in large part due to Landon's grip noticeably weakening. She continues to batter away at his face, never once stopping no matter how many times she feels her consciousness slipping away. Finally she strikes pay dirt, and a nasty punch across Landon's still sore nose causes him to break the hold and protect his face out of instinct.

COLE
And Krista is free!

Maddix regains his footing, and his twisted grin is replaced by a twisted snarl. That anger drives him at Krista with arms raised in a polish hammer. However, she greets his arrival with spinning kick to his gut. His beat red chest is further mauled by rage fueled chops that enchant the audience.  As Landon is left in a torturing haze, Krista rushes to the ropes and returns to bowl him over with a high flipping lariat! Just as soon as he touches the ground Miss California is back off the ropes and her lovely tan legs obliterate him with a crowd popping spinning wheel quick! Yet, Maddix gets up remarkably fast, and bum rushes Krissy with a lariat. Thankfully the beauty is prepared for his arrival and catches him with the Blonds Never Pay a Cover (Side Effect)! 

[color="#FF8C00"][font="Arial Black"]“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!”[/font][/color]

Clutching onto his sore neck, Maddix uneasily rises to face his reenergized foe. But she's no where to be found, having made another trip to the cables. By the time Maddix gets a read on her, her bare legs are leaping into him for one more try at the KIDology. Again, Maddix sternly refuses to fall prey to the move and shoves her away. Although she lands on her feet, that's of small comfort to the fitness queen, and highly annoyed, she rumbles at Maddix in blind rage. That blind rage brings upon her downfall, as Maddix simply ducks low and lets her glide onto his shoulders in set up for the G2S! 

[color="#FF0000"][b]“BOOOOOOO!”[/b]
[/color]
COACH
Here we go!

Weakened by such a trying match, Maddix has a devil of a time keeping hold of Krista's baby oil soaked body and she succeeds in gliding down his back to her freedom. But its freedom that doesn't last for more than a few seconds before the OAOAST's Savior shocks her with a stunner! Krista timbers back to the canvas like a mini skirted tree, and the wrathful audience assaults Maddix with jeers. While Maddix attempts to win the audience to his side with more hair fluffing, Krista rolls to the ring apron to try and still the throbbing headache that nearly cripples her. Only mere seconds later her time to recover is interrupted by Landon taking hold of her hair. He lifts her up and snags her into a front facelock. Almost immediately she tries to break out his bonds, but his strength is too great for her and he extends her body forward to leave her draped over the ropes. A quick victory nod to Megan comes before La Cucaracha  DDT's his popular foe into the canvas! With his arms still tied like a noose around his neck, he rolls her upright and then strikes her with a second DDT! She's puddy within his grip as he brings her up again for a third and final DDT. The fans say a little prayer that their girl can pull through, as Maddix rolls her over for a pinfall....

ONE!


TWO!

Miss California sends the capacity crowd into a frenzy by shooting her shoulder off the mat just in time to keep the MITB briefcase out of Landon's possession.  

COACH
Maddix don't need to get frustrated, cause every move that targets her head gets him a little closer to hitting that G2S and when he hits that G2S its a wrap for Krissy. 

COLE
He has to hit the move first. I think we're in double digits for missed finishers! 

Landon gets to his feet and stalks across the ring awaiting his foe to stand. As she slowly begins to stir, he begins dripping with malice and rage. The ropes help her to feet, but her confused state forces her into the waiting arms of Maddix who hoists her up for his latest G2S effort! But, Krista again slithers down his front, and before this even has a second to settle in his mind, she's dropkicking him in the chest! Her powerful legs launch him clear across the ring where's he tangled in the ropes, almost a sitting duck for the GLAADiator. She lets out a roar worthy of a gladiator then stampedes towards her rival. Yet, Maddix isn't nearly as incapacitated as she believed, and she's exposed to this chilling fact when he ducks to the ground, bringing the top rope with him. Incapable of hitting the breaks on time, Krissy is thrown from the ring! Like a crippled leather bound bird she falls, letting out a long terrified scream before splattering onto the outside mats. The audience reacts with cringes and cries, not knowing if the feisty Californian can take any more punishment. For his part Landon tries to win them over and screams, “Look at all this Madnificence! You know you want it! You know you love the Madnificence!”

[b][color="#8B0000"]“YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!”[/color][/b]

COLE
Did he say Madnificence? Do you really want this man on TV twice a week? You'd have Amnesty International protesting the TSM offices for crimes against humanity!

Hearing Krista's cries beneath the bile of the audience, Landon senses blood in the water and quickly departs the ring. He rushes to Krista's location, wanting to get there before she recover even a smidgen of her strength. With his hand wrapped around her skimpy vest top he hauls her off the mat. Then he whips her towards the steel steps with such incredible force he himself falls to the ground. Miss California is rammed head first into the metal, completely dislodging the steps and sending worried gasps from the mouthes of the fans. Their concern isn't eased any as she rolls over onto her back, face totally void of any life.

[color="#FF0000"][b]“LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA!”[/b][/color]

COACH
Damn, when Landon Maddix gets back to the SWF lockeroom, they better stand up and praise him as a leader, and a hero because my man is going all out here tonight.

COLE
He's ramming a single mother of two who weighs over fifty pounds less than him into steel steps. He's a greater American hero than John Wayne. 

Maddix roughly yanks her upright and deposits her back into the ring. He quickly scampers inside himself, where he hooks her leg for a crucial pin fall...

ONE!

TWO!

Krista hauls her shoulder off the canvas at the last possible second, and the fans rejoice with more chants of her name. While Megan reacts with total disbelief at Krista's escape, Landon only shrugs his shoulders in cool arrogance. But, his girlfriend can't find his unshakable confidence and hastily begins barking orders.

“You've got to try the Go 2 Sleep!” She shouts.

“Instead of being miss negative all the time,” Krista comments “Why don't you be miss help a playa out by jumping onto the apron and taking off your top to distract Krista?”

Enraged that Krista can even formulate a complete sentence, much less solicit his girlfriend, Maddix bum rushes wrestling's favorite lesbian cougar. But Krista meets his arrival with an elbow that sends him staggering backwards. Landon's moment of incapacitation gives her all the time she needs to springboard off the second rope and strike him with an enziguri! As the spectator toss humongous cheers in the air, a lifeless Maddix flops to the floor, and Krista begins fluffing her wonderful hair. One might assume she's mocking him, but given how narcissistic she is its doubtful she even knows he does that.

COLE
Well, Megan and Landon always have a plan, its just sometimes Landon isn't quite smart enough to follow it. 

Krista skedaddles outside the ring and ventures towards the top rope. She provides the money in the bank match a true money shot by reaching the top in the most bent over way possible. Megan, realizing, that such an attack could spell doom for her beau and the SWF rushes onto the apron to distract Krista. Annoyed, Miss California wonders why she's wasting her time if she's not topless or planning on getting topless. The answer of course is that her distraction allows Landon to scamper up to Krista's position. He begins  hammering Krista with forearms to the throat, as the fans hold their collective breath out of fear. After several strikes hit home it appears their fears may be realized as Maddix is now able to wrap her left arm across hid right. The noise of the audience grows louder, as they desperately urge Krissy to fight off Maddix's attack.  Not one to disappoint her fanbase, Krista counters by cursing Landon with an indescribable pain brought on by the Blue Ball Special (testicular claw). Or does she? Krista gropes and gropes, and seemingly comes up empty handed. She tries again and again, hoping to strike pay dirt, but has no luck. Finally she shrugs her free shoulder and shouts out there's nothing there!

[b]“BALLLESS WONDER! BALLLESS WONDER! BALLESS WONDER!”[/b]

“I have balls!” Landon whines. “I have balls the size of California!”

“You have balls the shape of a sock?” Krista wonders.

“No, the size! Shape refers to the external form or appearance, whereas size is the relative dimensions or magnit...look, just feel my balls, okay? Just feel them! I derive no pleasure from it! I swear!”

Wrong thing to say, my friend. Krista angrily shoves her would be sexual harasser off the ropes. Even though he comes down on his feet, that's of little use to him as Krista puts him on the ground and wows the crowd with a shooting star press!  Landon is left on dream street, exhausted, humiliated, and on the verge of defeat. All things he promised wouldn't happen to him against the walk of famer. He lies face down the mat, barely able to hear the words of encouragement Megan shouts at him.

COLE
That just connected perfectly with Landon's chest! Is this the end for Landon Maddix?

COACH
Son, you musta lost it! I wanna know what you been smokin on to think that.  Landon Maddix thrives in high pressure matches, this is just another day at the office for him

Hunching over to await Maddix's rise, Krista treats the audience to another bootylicious view. And when La Cucaracha rises she rushes forward to treat him to an induction into the church of KIDology! But, yet again, Landon refutes her efforts and jostles her away. She falls back on her feet, but hasn't time to prepare herself before Maddix astonishes her and the crowd with a KIDology of his own! 

COLE
Landon Maddix hit the KIDology! I don't believe it! 

Even Landon himself seems surprised to have accomplished what Krista's failed at all match, and he beams a smile brought on by a euphoric high. As the audience boos his stealing of Krista finisher, he covers her body.

ONE!



TWO!



Krista kicks out, a great shock to an audience that resigned themselves to an inevitable second world title run from Maddix.

[b][color="#FF8C00"]“LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA!”[/color][/b]

Though mortally exhausted, both competitors find the will and the strength within them to head to their feet. Their only motivator is the briefcase resting in Terry Taylor's lap. For the moment its Landon who seems to want it more as he slashes his boots into Krista's heavily insured legs. As she's weak on her feet, he runs the ropes, preparing to strike her with a shining wizard when he returns. But when he reaches Miss California, she lowers her body and captures him onto her shoulders. Maddix shrieks in horror, and the audience pops huge, neither one noticing Krista is barely able to support his two hundred eight pounds. Thankfully for her and the fans, her legs hold up long enough for her to crush him with his Go 2 Sleep!

[color="#FFA500"][font="Arial Black"]“YEAAAAAAA!”[/font][/color]

COLE
Go 2 Sleep Landon Maddix, your money in the bank dreams have just turned into a nightmare!

Landon's body contracts and convulses on the ground, and he screams in pain; its quite the spectacular image to a woman who's tried so desperately to put him away. She hooks his leg, and all of the Alamo Dome counts along.

CROWD
ONE!

CROWD
TWO!

Maddix kicks out, and the fans are infuriated! They blast the referee for not making a quicker count, and Maddix for even managing to pull through his dangerous finisher. Krista decides to let the voices of her sixty thousand closest friends deal with the ref, and gets to her feet to deal with Maddix.

[font="Arial Black"][color="#8B0000"]“BOOOOOO!”[/color][/font]holler the audience, their attention shifting from Buzzlefoxer and Maddix to the man who trots down the entry ramp. Its Landon's loyal lackey, James Blonde, clad in a SWF Prelude To Grandeur t-shirt. But perhaps a more troubling concern to Krista's legion of fans is that Megan Skye  through a swift kick to the skull has forcibly removed the cash filled briefcase from Terry's possession. Taylor tries his hardest to recover the briefcase, but Megan will have none of that and stomps him down.

COACH
Terry Taylor you're a two hundred plus pound wrestler and you just got bullied by a one hundred twenty pound woman. If she loses this match, Krista is gonna have yo ass hanging from rafters by meathooks. 

Hollering a torrent of profanities at Krista, The Trendsetter reaches the apron in one graceful leap. His cruel words draw the attention of the hot headed Californian, while Megan draws the attention of Buzzlefoxer. Although he's standing mere inches away from her, his god awful sight lets her sneak the half a million dollar briefcase to the waiting hands of her boyfriend.

COLE
Megan gave Landon the briefcase and she has Clem distracted! Turn around, Krista!

Indeed that would be a prudent action, as Landon is wielding the briefcase like a battering ram and charging towards Krista. But, as he's only a few inches away from dashing her world title hopes, the SoCal babe turns away from Blonde and catches his leader with the KIDology! Hands held onto the briefcase, Maddix hasn't any way of shoving Krista away this time. He finally experiences the horrific pain he's avoided all night long and his jaw and chest are brought directly into the hard surface of the case! A roar that's both a mixture of excitement and relief rushes through the stands at the sight of Landon flopping over to the mat.

COLE
Krista hit it! She finally hit the KIDology! 

With Megan's skin turning a shade of milky white and her body on the verge of fainting, Krista hooks her man's leg for a pivotal pinfall. At the urging of sixty thousand screaming wrestling nerds, Buzzlefoxer scores the fall.

CROWD
ONE!

CROWD
TWO!

CROWD
THREE!

And with that three count comes an outpouring of mammoth cheers from the sold out crowd, everyone on their feet, celebrating as if they themselves just saw the culmination of a grueling two month tournament. MGMT's Electric Feel just adds to the wonderful festive atmosphere. On the outside, Terry Taylor can breath the greatest sigh of relief of his life, because after all being hung by your ass from meathooks probably hurts.

BUFFER
The winner of the sixteen person Money In The Bank Tournament, and half a million dollars of Theodore Moneymaker's money....KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN!

COLE
Ladies and gentlemen, Krista Isadora Duncan has done it!  On the night that Little Miss California has become the women's champion, Miss California has become Miss Money In The Bank! What a day for the Duncan girls!

COACH
Mister Moneymaker, if you're watching I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!

Indeed Theodore Moneymaker is watching, as we cut backstage to his dressing room and find his head buried in his hands in an infinite sorrow, and Mackenzie struggling to find the words to comfort him. Back in the ring, Megan cradles Landon in her arms, her lips brushing her sweat soaked skin, her long fingers caressing his withered face. Though motionless, Landon is very much awake his eyes hardened by the loss, his heart keenly aware of the emptiness left behind by the future that was taken away from him. Elsewhere Blonde heaps plea after plea upon Buzzlefoxer to rescind his ruling and call for a disqualification of Krista. There's nothing to be done, however, and his idol is just another name in the long list of people to fall victim to Krista.

COLE
Landon Maddix promised he'd repeat as Mister Money In The Bank, he promised he'd win the half a million dollars, he promised he'd return the SWF back to television, and he promised to do the [i]unpredictable[/i]. But, La Cucaracha, tonight belongs to Krista Isadora Duncan, and that's oh so predictable!

Krista is the happiest she's ever been in the OAOAST. Though that's not saying much, it does say something when she joyously falls into Terry Taylor's arms with her only intention being to celebrate with him and not belly to belly suplex him. TT feels as much bliss as she does, and enthusiastically returns her hug.  As she's handed the briefcase that helped her so, delight and glow in her eyes. Winded and panting, she rises to the top turnbuckles. She beams an exhilarated grin with the briefcase clutched against her chest, and the audience and Terry showing their love with a massive ovation.  

[font="Arial Black"][color="#008000"][size="4"]$$$MONEY IN THE BANK 2008 WINNER$$$[/size][/color][/font]
[size="6"][color="#FF00FF"][font="Arial Black"]***KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN***[/font][/color][/size]