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Lt. Al Giardello

Fuck you...

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This topic is now about this guy.

 

cobra-commander-2008.jpg

In the first season of the original 1980s animated series, Cobra Commander is the leader of Cobra, described in the show's opening theme as "A ruthless, terrorist organization determined to rule the world". His face is always covered, either by a featureless chrome mask concealing his entire face or by a hood with eyehole cutouts. He wears a blue military uniform, occasionally sporting a cape and carrying a scepter, depending on the occasion. His distinctively raspy voice was provided by Chris Latta, who also provided the voice of Starscream in Transformers. The voices of Starscream and Cobra Commander were virtually identical, with the difference being that for the former, Latta's voice was run through a vocoder to produce the characteristic digital echo effect of the Transformers.

Although only Cobra Commander's eyes are ever openly exposed, it is clear from this partial view that he is a brown-eyed Caucasian. His reason for wearing the mask was not expressly divulged, but in one episode, Lights! Camera! Cobra!, Destro interrupts his unmasked privacy during a meal and is repulsed at what he saw (which is not shown on-screen), prompting the Commander to wryly muse "It takes a strong stomach to watch me eat, eh, Destro?", implying that he may have some unsightly deformity. This is later confirmed in G.I. Joe: The Movie, where his face is shown to have been horribly disfigured as the result of a laboratory mishap involving "genetic altering spores". It is not the original origin the writers of the cartoon series had in mind, however. This is further evidenced by Cobra Commander's blue skinned appearance during that particular scene.

Cobra Commander frequently led assaults himself, but often vacillated between being a coward at heart, usually the first to turn tail in retreat whenever the tide of battle shifted unfavorably, or pushing his troops to seize victory at all costs, berating them when they turned to retreat. Impatient and frequently hysterical, he was prone to fits of rage when things went badly, often launching into extended rants. He was also greedy and egotistical, often mistreating his own troops to the point of mutiny, and on multiple occasions saw his plans foiled by his own arrogance.

He had a knack for concocting creative schemes for world domination - including cloned dinosaurs, giant amoebas, miniaturized troops stowed away inside Christmas presents, and using a superlaser to gleefully carve a picture of his face on the moon à la Chairface Chippendale - plans which his immediate subordinates, particularly Destro, often blasted as ridiculous. (In fact, when Destro found out about the moon carving, he shouted why were millions of dollars wasted on "this... cosmic graffiti!?") As such, he was less of an evil genius and more of a psychotic egomaniac. The writers later commented that they only found Cobra Commander's personality when they stopped writing him as an Adolf Hitler-type and started writing him more in the vein of Yosemite Sam.

Season 2 opened with the 5-episode mini-series Arise, Serpentor, Arise! in which the Cobra organization decides that, after Cobra Commander had repeatedly failed to bring them victory, they should literally create a new leader. Under the guidance of Dr. Mindbender, Cobra's scientists combine DNA samples retrieved from the tombs of history's most notorious despots (along with DNA from current G.I. Joe member Sgt. Slaughter) to genetically craft Cobra Commander's successor, Serpentor, who immediately assumes charge of Cobra and deposes the erstwhile Commander to the status of "lackey."

Fortunately for the Commander, G.I. Joe managed to interfere with the gene collection to deny Serpentor the critical inclusion of Sun Tzu's essence and with only a little of Sgt. Slaughter's. The absence of that ancient military strategist's influence evidently makes Serpentor prone to impulsive foolhardiness that shows when he immediately orders a full-scale attack on Washington, D.C.. While the operation is initially successful, it soon turns into a complete fiasco at the hands of G.I. Joe's reprisals. Cobra Commander is able to convince Dr. Mindbender to free him from his handcuffs because he knows how to use a weapon and Cobra needs all the help it can get. During the battle, Cobra's vehicles began to run out of fuel, except for one Night Raven, which would take the high command back to Cobra Island. A sudden burst of fire cuts the Joes off from Serpentor. The high command is shocked to learn Cobra Commander saved them. Serpentor orders the high command to the Night Raven while he deals with the Commander. In a rare moment of brilliance, Cobra Commander is able to convince Serpentor that he needs him for a scapegoat.

Thereafter, Cobra Commander seems to be employed as the organizations primary field commander, while Serpentor leads mostly from the Terrordrome. Serpentor even allowed Cobra Commander to be the organization's second-in-command, a decision tolerated by the rest of the Cobra High Command. Cobra Commander spent most of Season 2 trying to reclaim his former glory from under Serpentor's domineering shadow, assembling his own secret society called The Coil to that end.

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G.I. Joe: The Movie explained Cobra Commander's origin in full, but it contradicted material seen in the animated series. Cobra Commander is revealed to be a former scientist and nobleman from the ancient, pre-human society of Cobra-La. Although humanoid in appearance, he has pale blue skin, no hair, and eyes with cat-like pupils. The nobleman was disfigured in a laboratory accident while studying a strange plant which sprayed his face with mutative spores, causing him to grow an asymmetrical array of eyes over his face, thus explaining why he wears a mask. Despite this deformity, his ambition was recognized and he was selected by Cobra-La's ruler, Golobulus, to venture from their isolated Himalayan kingdom into the outside world, there he was instructed to establish an army for the razing of human civilization, allowing Cobra-La to retake the planet.

Cobra was this army, but in light of their constant failures, Golobulus decides to put the Commander on trial and punishes him by forcing his further exposure to the spores, whose effect begins to devolve him into a snake. Escaping with Joe member Roadblock, Cobra Commander's "humanity" begins to slip away as his body transforms. Soon he is left mindlessly hissing that he was "once-ssss a man...". In the end, seeking vengeance for his deteriorating condition, he tries to lead a Joe offensive into Cobra-La but ultimately becomes mentally unresponsive as his continuing metamorphosis fully changes him into an oversized snake. He briefly slithers to Lt. Falcon's rescue during the final battle, foiling Serpentor's attack, allowing Falcon to defeat Serpentor and Golobulus and save the world.

This origin stands in contradiction to background information previously hinted at in the cartoon: in the episode Twenty Questions, the Commander told an interviewing journalist that he was responsible for spearheading a mutiny at his military academy in his youth. In other episodes, aforementioned reactions to off-screen unmaskings or glimpses of the Commander's features are not in keeping with the inhumanly blue-skinned figure portrayed in the movie.

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After the movie, Cobra Commander is seen as a cobra and he is kept as a pet by Serpentor. However, Baroness steals him and restores him partly to a semi-human form, because she had been rejected by Destro in favor of Zarana, and was seeking revenge. The basic shape of his body is humanoid, his skin and features are reptilian and he retains a taste for flies he catches with his prehensile tongue. However, upon being outfitted with his battle armor, Cobra Commander once again appears to be a caucasian male. His inhuman origins are never mentioned again, and he is never shown to have reptilian features again.

Back in human form, his attempt to overthrow Serpentor is nearly foiled when his newly created Python Patrol is too scared to attack, but with the help of Low-Light (in disguise as a Viper) , Serpentor is captured. Gnawgahyde provides his Iguana for use in the pythonizing ray and it is unclear if Serpentor (now an iguana) is dead or is a pet. He tries to get the Dragon Fire energy but G.I. Joe has foiled his plans again.

Through that, he took over Cobra once again with Destro rejoining as his second-in-command alongside Baroness and later, Major Bludd. He also joins forces with Eco Terrorist Cesspool, whom he immediately plans to double cross. The Commander is still as hysterical as before, but seems far more in control of his organization with Serpentor no longer around, and other enemies like Dr. Mindbender and The Crimson Twins gone. He also spends much of his time trying to regain his lost fortunes, and states numerous times that Cobra is more or less broke. His subordinates also make reference to this, as he apparently does not pay them much, if anything at all. In the first season he wears the battle armor, and in the second season he regains his hood and blue military uniform.

His personality and creative schemes are now far more dangerous than the last time, including schemes such as creating a fake General Hawk to make the Joe lax ("A is for Android") or creating an ozone creme that he forces the masses to buy to protect themselves. So far, he is seen far braver than the previous seasons, and now Destro has renewed loyalty to him they attempt to defeat the Joes once and for all. With his leadership, Cobra almost defeats the Joes several times ("Victory at Volcania" parts I & II, "D-Day at Alcatraz" I & II, "Long Live Rock N Roll" I & II), and he is even captured once (in "Shadow of a Doubt") but escapes with the help of Storm Shadow (who is now a G.I. Joe). At the end of the series, Cobra and G.I. Joe are still waging war, and he is still attempting to gain his first real animated victory.

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Czech Republic I think does alot of drugs.

 

This is my new member title

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Fuck that shit... Who you think you talkin to? I'll put you underground like ya role model Heath Ledger...

 

FYI, Heath Ledger was cremated and his ashes were spread throughout Cottesloe Beach.

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Duh, he's black.

 

Dominican*, they don't count!

 

Close enough.

 

They are not apart of African-American sterotypes!

 

Plus mellow is jewish and always drinks 40's!

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COBRA

la la la la

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