Guest the 1inch punch Posted June 26, 2002 Report Posted June 26, 2002 Ok, I'm paraphrasing here Kent Brockman Millions of young mean trained for War, the Government calls it "The Army", a more correct name for it would be "The KILL-BOT Factory" Or the one in the Dancing Lisa episode where all thw kids say Communism to this stupid question If anyone Knows those two quotes, please get back to me
Guest Vern Gagne Posted June 27, 2002 Report Posted June 27, 2002 From Krusty's Comeback Special "If this is the call back from the porno movie...Listen I was a little nervous, but I can assure you I'm all man" From the Film Festival Smithers-Sir, We weren't able to get Steven Spielberg. Mr.Burns- Very well than get his non-union mexican equivilent.
Guest Dr. Wrestlingphysics Posted June 27, 2002 Report Posted June 27, 2002 From the episode where Bart's on Focusin: Martin Prince: I take hormones to lower my voice, now all I wanna do is fight. What are YOU looking at? From Burns' Heir: Milhouse Van Houten: But my mom says I'm cool.
Guest caboose Posted June 27, 2002 Report Posted June 27, 2002 In the episode where Bart & Lisa reunite Krusty and his dad, Krusty rings a sex chat phoneline and is connected to Apu and two other guys. Apu-'Hello, are you a beaustiful woman?' Krusty-'Do I sound like one?!?!?' Apu-'This party is not as hot as I had imagined'
Guest DrEvil Posted June 27, 2002 Report Posted June 27, 2002 Woman: Did something crawl down your throat and die? Barney: It didn't die.
Guest Shaved Bear Posted June 27, 2002 Report Posted June 27, 2002 Homer: Ill never drink another beer again Beer Man: Beer Here! Homer: Ill take ten
Guest IDrinkRatsMilk Posted June 27, 2002 Report Posted June 27, 2002 Marge: Have you been drinking? Homer: NO!... Well, ten beers. Sideshow Bob: That was a well-written piece of non claptrap that never made me want to retch.
Guest Kotzenjunge Posted June 27, 2002 Report Posted June 27, 2002 "I think what we have seen speaks for itself. The Corvair spacecrafrt has been overtaken by a race of giant spaceants. There's nothing we can do to stop them, the ants are coming. They will come fast, and probably use us as labor(at this point, a picture of a big ant whipping humans pops up next to him). I offer my services as a television personality to help round up humans to toil away in your underground sugar mines." -- Kent Brockman "That sounded like a pig fainting in a closet!" -- The dean from when Homer went to college
Guest Dr. Wrestlingphysics Posted June 27, 2002 Report Posted June 27, 2002 I don't mean to shit on Shaved Bear or IDrinkRatsMilk, but the quotes can't be by members of the Simpsons family. Carl Carlson: Let's make litter out of these literati. Lenny: That's too clever, you're one of them!
Guest J*ingus Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 Carl, after he reduces the entire bar to tears: "See this is why I don't talk much."
Guest caboose Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 Carl-'If you could have one wish what would it be?' Lenny-'I always wanted to know what it felt like to wear something that had been ironed.' Carl-'what about you Moe? One wish.' Moe-'I was going to say a million bucks, but an ironed shirt, damn thats tempting!'
Guest El Psycho Diablo Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 Snake- "Yo..did she just say she used to be a dude?"
Guest Kotzenjunge Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 Ralph: Daddy, I'm so scared I can't wet my pants! Chief Wiggum: Don't worry Ralphie, just relax, and it'll come.
Guest Anubis Puppet Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 "I'm a big stupid moron with an ugly face and a big BUTT and my BUTT smells and I like to kiss my own BUTT." -Moe
Guest IDrinkRatsMilk Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 "I don't mean to shit on Shaved Bear or IDrinkRatsMilk, but the quotes can't be by members of the Simpsons family." Yeah, I know, hence my Sideshow Bob quote... I just had to throw that out cause I saw Homer's other "ten beers" quote. Here's another: Kent Brockman: ...and the kitten played with that ball of string, all through the night. On a lighter note a Quik-E-Mart clerk was brutally murdered yesterday.
Guest Army Eye Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 Carl Carlson: Let's make litter out of these literati. Lenny: That's too clever, you're one of them! LOL. Saw this one today on syndication. I LOVE all the riot scenes in the Simpsons so I was in heaven with this episode.
Guest Shaved Bear Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 Chief Wiggum (to Homer) O Loook, it's that stupid cop from TV(with gun cocked, he uses the tip of his gun as a Q-Tip)
Guest Ravenbomb Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 "From now on, we'll be taking GOLDEN showers!" Kent Brockman, in the New Springfield episode
Guest Kotzenjunge Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 (I can't remember what episode, Bart and Homer ended up comandeering a parade float in the end) Moe: Hey, they're heading for the old mill! Someone Else(I don't remember who): But they aren't going to the old mill. Moe: Let's go to the old mill anyway, get some cider! Another Moe GOLDEN moment: (Comet episode) "Let's go burn down the observatory so this'll never happen again!"
Guest Vern Gagne Posted June 28, 2002 Report Posted June 28, 2002 "From Burns' Heir: Milhouse Van Houten: But my mom says I'm cool. " From Burns' Heir: Milhouse: I have nothing to offer you but my love. Mr.Burns: I specificially said no geeks
Guest Razor Roman Posted July 1, 2002 Report Posted July 1, 2002 Drederick Tatum, getting a statue dedicated to him for his work against litter. "Litter is my greatest nemesis. I want to eat it's children"
Guest JangoFett4Hire Posted July 1, 2002 Report Posted July 1, 2002 Ralphie Wiggum - My cat's breath smells like catfood!
Guest Dr. Wrestlingphysics Posted July 1, 2002 Report Posted July 1, 2002 Troy McClure "Hi, I'm Troy McClure, and you might remember me from such self-help films as 'Smoke Yourself Thin' and 'Get Confident, Stupid'." Australian Bartender "I see you've played knifey-spoony before."
Guest Blue Bacchus Posted July 1, 2002 Report Posted July 1, 2002 From one of the Halloween Episodes: Comic Book Guy- "But Aquaman You cannot marry her, She doesn't have gills... Oh I've wasted my life."
Guest RavishingRickRudo Posted July 1, 2002 Report Posted July 1, 2002 NO NO NONONONON!O!NOOOOOOO!!!!!!! "But Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills, YOU'RE FROM TWO DIFFERENT WWOOOORLDS" "Goodnight Springton, there will be no encore"
Guest MD2020 Posted July 3, 2002 Report Posted July 3, 2002 Rough Paraphrase: Tatum: ...come this Saturday night, I'm definately going to make orphans of his children." Reporter: Champ, I do believe they have a mother. Tatum: Yes, but I imagine she will die of grief.
Guest TheMikeSC Posted July 4, 2002 Report Posted July 4, 2002 Lionel Hutz (with a bit piece with Marge) Lionel: Oh no, we've drawn Judge Snyder. Marge: Is that bad? Lionel: Well, he's had it out for me since I accidentally ran over his dog. Marge: You did? Lionel: Well, replace the word "accidentally" with "repeatedly" and the word "dog" with "son". -=Mike ...Yes, I know Marge was technically involved and all---but Lionel was the man there. God I miss him.
Guest JAxlMorrison Posted July 6, 2002 Report Posted July 6, 2002 Bart: Take em away boys Wiggum: Hey I get to say that....bake me away, toys Other cop: What was that Chief? Wiggum: Do what the kid says Wiggum: That's right here at a Hippie pot party, the little lady gets the "munchies" for a California cheeseburger Barney: After this case, and then the next case, there's only one case left! <tries to disguise his voice> Yeah Barney's right, let get's some more beer! More beer! Yeah Barney's right!
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