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Kane, what can he do next?

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First and for no reason other than I am bored a history lesson for those not familiar with the early career of Kane.

 

The Seven lives of Glen Jacobs, & that is indeed an apt title as the big man now known as Kane has had more chances than most to make it in the big time. Here is the story of what came before Kane.

 

Glen began life as ‘Doomsday’ in Puerto Rico back in 1994 & he spent his first year there. At the same time he spent some time on the US Indy scene & it was here Jim Cornette ‘discovered him’. February 1995 & rechristned Unabomb Glen made his Smokey Mountain Wrestling debut for Cornette. Thrown into a tag team with Al Snow they quickly won the tag gold from the past it team of Rock & Roll express. Tracy Smothers & Tony Anthony grabbed the gold back after 3 months.

 

After several months of floundering around in mid card hell, which included a loss to The Undertaker at Superbowl of wrestling, Glen got a try out with WWE. Glen made his vignette debut in July of 1995 so when he had a loser leaves town match with Smothers & Anthony it was no surprise when he lost the match. (Incidentally only the loser left town so Snow stuck around.)

 

What role had Jacobs got? What was his ticket to the big time? Isaac Yankeem Twisted dentist & madman who was supposedly working for Jerry ‘king’ Lawler. Ok so this was a set back but Glen could make something of this dull role right?

 

Vinny Mac sure thought so he was pushed straight into a feud with the best, Bret Hart. The match took place at Summerslam 1995, & it stunk not even Hart could pull a good match out of Jacobs this early in his carer. Even Vince knew better than to continue this big man push. Vince McMahon was desperate during these times but even he was not that desperate. At Survivor Series the man who would play a big part in his future, The Undertaker, Eliminated him in an 8-man contest. That was that for Jacobs on PPV. In rapid succession Hart, Ahmed Johnson, Bob Holly & even Henry Godwinn pinned him in IYH & Raw dark matches.

 

When he appeared on TV again in Sep 1996 it was with a new & improved role. This role would prove to be bitter sweet for our man however. Vince McMahon lost 2 main eventers in Scott Hall & Kevin Nash to WCW. Their characters Razor Ramon & Diesel had being way over so what did Vince do pretend they had never left.

 

Glen was now ‘Diesel II & Rick Bogner was Razor II & were the fans ever insulted. Attempting with absolute no success to also turn Jim Ross heel as their manager of sorts they bombed. The fans did not give a rat's ass they knew a cheap imitation when they saw one. Still Vince was determined to make something of the situation.

 

They appeared in an 8 man at the survivor series 1996 ppv bout that ended in one of those deeply annoying no finish situations when both teams got DQ'ed. At IYH it's time one month later the duo got a tag title shot & promptly were shown how to wrestle on route to being squashed by the late Owen Hart & Davey Boy Smith.

 

Come the Rumble & the push was stalling for ‘Hall’ who was quickly eliminated. Glen as Nash fared a little better & was one of the final 5 in the rumble Bret Hart ousted him. That was that Vince realised he had screwed up & sent them both packing to AAA in Mexico. Glen was once again Doomsday in AAA & also in USWA. It was here that he got his first H/W title winning the USWA belt.

 

With two shockingly awful roles in the WWE he would never get another chance right? Wrong Vince McMahon never gives up on a man the size of Glen Jacobs. The Undertaker had become somewhat stale so Vinny Mac decided to introduce a brother for the deadman to feud with. Kane was to be this brother & Glen had just the right looks so the role was his.

 

We all know what happened next Jacobs appeared in the first HIAC match & attacked Undertaker. The duo would feud & tem for the next 5 years. He also managed to bag a one-day title run by shockingly beating Austin in a first Blood match.

 

I am not going to go into great detail aout the rest of his WWE career, everybody knows what happened next. Endless matches with undertaker, unmasking, Dull stuff with Snitskey yada yada. So let me instead get to the point of the thread, what next for Kane?

 

I think maybe a face turn. The fans seemed ready to cheer him again as of late, last few weeks anyway so I think this could work. A move bask to SD and fresh fights with Face HHH or maybe Edge would also be a good thing. Maybe freshen up the character a little as well. Give him a new enterence or new music maybe. Anything really as he is stale as week old bread. If WWE don't want to go the face all the way at least still change something about his character. Make his gimmick slightly different. Maybe the angry giant who doesn't know his own strenght? Or possibly try some comedy. Kane has done comedy before and it was very funny. (remember the Rock and Hogan impressions?) Either way do something and do it quick before the little fan support he has left vanishes.

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Wheres the hell are the cliff notes for that great wall of text?

 

PS, you might not have noticed yet, but at TSM nobody cares about what you think..

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Is this a gimmick account? But to say Kane is boring too makes me wonder why you watch wrestling at all. Kane has been one of the more established and entertaining stars for the WWE over the last 10 years. Glenn Jacobs has stuck and made the Kane gimmick his own. Looking back he hasn't really had amazing matches and his feuds at best are a little... questionable, but he's still entertaining in the ring.

 

It might not be the best match of the night, but the way Jacobs sells the character makes it worthwhile to watch.

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But to say Kane is boring too makes me wonder why you watch wrestling at all.

 

Don't even try to understand what's going on here man.

 

 

Yeah, yeah, yeah we all know the joke about MSG. It seems to be the in thing to pretend Kevin Nash is some sort of god, or genius or even an athlete. Take it from me none of the above is true.

 

Ok so he is has being funny and or entertaining in TNA, to a point anyway, but really who cares?

 

Kevin Nash is the most boring man on the planet, nay the universe

 

It is a puzzle I have long tried to decipher, why does Nash get chance after chance when he is a walking colossal bore. Will we never be rid of the wolrd's least intresting wrestler. (WCW first run Unfunny and can't act at all can't wrestle. WWF run Unfunny and can't act at all and can just about wrestle. WCW second run as WWF. WWE run the same. TNA run Funny all of a sudden and still can't act. What little wrestling ability there was long gone.) Um sorry if this sounds like a character assassination, but that is the idea. Sure other wrestlers have outstayed their welcome or keep popping up for one more pay day. (Hello Mr Hogan, Mr Foley.) Most of them though can still put on a good or at least fair show. Nash has never put on a good show, at least not where it counts most. Fan support and numbers.

 

 

 

WWE (F), WCW and TNA have all tried to turn him into a dollar sign and all have failed, Nash just can't draw when it counts. Let's turn the clock back for a minute and look at his WWF World title run in 1994. He held the title for a long time and faced some good opponents. (Bret, HBK and um Mabel well ok not all good.) Did he draw a dime? No and while some of the matches looked good it was mostly his opponent who made him look good. As they say it takes two to tango and logic says Nash must have done some of the work but even the man himself has admitted to his shortcomings in these matches. For example on the HBK from the vault DVD. He had and has basic if any ring skills and moved like a tortise.

 

Now I love basic brawlers, but even I draw the line somewhere.

 

 

He also couldn't emote to save his life, one of the few areas he has improved a bit at least he can cut a average promo now.

 

Nash is now about 48 years old and if anything is even less mobile than ever, injuries ensure that. It's an in joke that every Nash match may have him suffer an injury for no apparent reason. Or it was in his WWE run anyway. Joke it may be but he has suffered injuries for no reason in particular before. Look at his 'comeback' in 2003 he had a seriously dull run as the Number One contender to HHH (Who was himself having a bad year) and suffered injuries seemingly at random. (Six Knee injuries a Quad tear and a biceps rapture.)

 

This makes me ponder just what in the hell he was even doing in a ring in 2003, or now. He should retire for his body alone. Lest we forget though in wrestling, more in WWE than TNA but still both, if you can cut a good scripted promo and can at least punch and kick other shortcomings will be ignored. However, and comedy, aside has Nash even had one interview / angle / talking segment other than comedy which was good or even passable? In WWF he was kept far away from the mic and got over because of his 'talent'. (size, power and not a lot else.) This was a good idea. In WCW he mostly stood around looking vaguely intresting and had cool hair. Hall and Hogan did the talking and all the better. This, again, was a good idea. His Solo efforts post NWO in WCW and WWE showed a man who didn't care and did not want to better himself.

 

Getting away from the talking I seriously do not understand ,giving the lack of overall talent, why Nash always gets another chance. Well actually I do Nash bends bookers to his point of view, he manipulates them. He treats peers as somebody to use and he regularly disses anybody who opposes his views. (He also disses the business publicly.) Somehow the bookers fall for this time and again.

 

 

By now you are probably thinking boy I really hate Kevin Nash, or have a chip on my shoulder, or am just ranting about hating him.

 

You're wrong I love him in fact. I was a huge Diesel mark and NWO mark and despite the fact he never lived up to the hype I always enjoyed a Nash match. His role in TNA meanwhile really suits his (lack of) talents and is one of the companies better non home grown assets. So long live Kevin Nash the most boring entertainer you will ever see.

 

It's still neither big nor funny to pretend to like him though.

 

"Most boring man on earth", anti-Nash rant, sudden 180 to admit loving him and always enjoying his matches, then another dramatic 180 at the end attacking anyone who likes him?

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Not much needs to be done with Kane- he's still really over. He can win matches and it doesn't hurt his opponents much. He can lose matches and it doesn't hurt him much. He's consistently entertaining in the ring. His character is usually stale outside of a few moments during the year (like last year at the beginning of the Mysterio feud)- but that's okay....he is still entertaining for the live crowds and I'd rather the creative team's efforts go else where. Just move him around the brands and he'll help whatever roster he is on.

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Is this a gimmick account? But to say Kane is boring too makes me wonder why you watch wrestling at all. Kane has been one of the more established and entertaining stars for the WWE over the last 10 years. Glenn Jacobs has stuck and made the Kane gimmick his own. Looking back he hasn't really had amazing matches and his feuds at best are a little... questionable, but he's still entertaining in the ring.

 

It might not be the best match of the night, but the way Jacobs sells the character makes it worthwhile to watch.

 

Kane has been stale since after the Edge-Lita feud.

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Is this a gimmick account?

 

Is this a rhetorical question?

 

Do you always answer a question with a question?

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Is this a gimmick account?

 

Is this a rhetorical question?

 

Do you always answer a question with a question?

So what if he does?

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Is this a gimmick account? But to say Kane is boring too makes me wonder why you watch wrestling at all. Kane has been one of the more established and entertaining stars for the WWE over the last 10 years. Glenn Jacobs has stuck and made the Kane gimmick his own. Looking back he hasn't really had amazing matches and his feuds at best are a little... questionable, but he's still entertaining in the ring.

 

It might not be the best match of the night, but the way Jacobs sells the character makes it worthwhile to watch.

 

Kane has been stale since after the Edge-Lita feud.

 

Not sure if stale is the word, more like under utilized. They haven't done anything with him since then, he's just kind of hung about looking mean and asked if someone was alive or dead that went no where.

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Is this a gimmick account? But to say Kane is boring too makes me wonder why you watch wrestling at all. Kane has been one of the more established and entertaining stars for the WWE over the last 10 years. Glenn Jacobs has stuck and made the Kane gimmick his own. Looking back he hasn't really had amazing matches and his feuds at best are a little... questionable, but he's still entertaining in the ring.

 

It might not be the best match of the night, but the way Jacobs sells the character makes it worthwhile to watch.

 

Kane has been stale since after the Edge-Lita feud.

 

Not sure if stale is the word, more like under utilized. They haven't done anything with him since then, he's just kind of hung about looking mean and asked if someone was alive or dead that went no where.

 

He has feuds with Umaga, MVP, Booker, Rey Mysterio Jr etc. All which were crappy feuds.

 

He needs to take a break and come back, then he will be fresh again. Otherwise he will just keep on being stale.

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Is this a gimmick account? But to say Kane is boring too makes me wonder why you watch wrestling at all. Kane has been one of the more established and entertaining stars for the WWE over the last 10 years. Glenn Jacobs has stuck and made the Kane gimmick his own. Looking back he hasn't really had amazing matches and his feuds at best are a little... questionable, but he's still entertaining in the ring.

 

It might not be the best match of the night, but the way Jacobs sells the character makes it worthwhile to watch.

 

Kane has been stale since after the Edge-Lita feud.

 

Not sure if stale is the word, more like under utilized. They haven't done anything with him since then, he's just kind of hung about looking mean and asked if someone was alive or dead that went no where.

The problem is you can only be underutilized and booked poorly for so long before you do become stale...

 

once that happens usually a turn or hiatus/big return is needed to freshen things up...Kane really hasn't gotten either of the two in a long time

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Is this a gimmick account?

 

Is this a rhetorical question?

 

Do you always answer a question with a question?

So what if he does?

 

Did I say it was a problem?

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Kane should team with Kofi, grow dreads, and become a stoned Rastafarian.

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Is this a gimmick account?

 

Is this a rhetorical question?

 

Do you always answer a question with a question?

So what if he does?

 

Did I say it was a problem?

 

Am I a mind reader?

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Is this a gimmick account? But to say Kane is boring too makes me wonder why you watch wrestling at all. Kane has been one of the more established and entertaining stars for the WWE over the last 10 years. Glenn Jacobs has stuck and made the Kane gimmick his own. Looking back he hasn't really had amazing matches and his feuds at best are a little... questionable, but he's still entertaining in the ring.

 

It might not be the best match of the night, but the way Jacobs sells the character makes it worthwhile to watch.

 

Kane has been stale since after the Edge-Lita feud.

 

Not sure if stale is the word, more like under utilized. They haven't done anything with him since then, he's just kind of hung about looking mean and asked if someone was alive or dead that went no where.

 

He has feuds with Umaga, MVP, Booker, Rey Mysterio Jr etc. All which were crappy feuds.

 

He needs to take a break and come back, then he will be fresh again. Otherwise he will just keep on being stale.

 

Those lasted a week or two and quickly disappeared. He needs one last big feud before he retires, the only ones that stick out were the ones with The Undertaker and Edge.

 

If he did have a break and came back, what would you have him do? Continue to be Kane the semi demonic friendly giant? Or go whole hog and just go psycho (within pg-13 guidelines)?

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The Rey feud at least produced an entertaining match at No Mercy last year. The new youngster fanbase ate it up. But yeah, otherwise not a good feud.

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Psycho Kane is always the best.

 

He needs to hook people's testes to car batteries more often, or carry around a hook on a chain.

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Is this a gimmick account?

 

Is this a rhetorical question?

 

Do you always answer a question with a question?

So what if he does?

 

Did I say it was a problem?

 

Am I a mind reader?

 

Is there a point to this?

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Psycho Kane is always the best.

 

He needs to hook people's testes to car batteries more often, or carry around a hook on a chain.

Agreed. Jacobs can just pull off the psycho but still functional act better than just about anyone besides Brian Pillman.

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I mentioned my fantasy booking of Kane before, but I doubt re-treading it here will bring down the quality of this thread.

 

Kane needs a break first. Give him six months off and have him slim down a bit and grow his hair back out. Before he leaves, he could cut a promo on how he doesnt have the heart to keep up this facade anymore. He admits that he has always known he was not disfigured or burned, and that he has been shaving his hair this way for the past several years just to play a character. He doesn't have the desire for it anymore, and he's going home.

 

After a couple of months, a couple of wrestlers can debut. I would call them Minion and Lucipher, a tag team that cuts promos stating that they will unleash "Hell on Earth." They can say they do their master's bidding, and serve only him. Around 5 months after Kane has been gone, they say that their master is ready to come back. Rather than make cryptic promos about who their master is, they announce that it is indeed Kane. Each week, Kane's return is hyped up, and they say that it won't be the Kane that they remember, and everyone should prepare for his return.

 

The night has come for Kane's debut, and he is brought out to the top of the ramp on a throne carried by druids while (face wrestler) is in the ring. He has medium length hair, his goatee is back, and he is wearing a black version of the mask he had last. He is wearing a dark robe and no glove. He sits on his throne glaring at the audience and his followers as his new music plays. He cuts a promo saying that he is ready to return due to finally being able to be himself. He says that his life has been full of torment, and he lives in his own personal Hell. However, he rules that Hell with an iron fist, and he unleashes that Hell on the WWE starting tonight. By raising a hand, Minion and Lucipher rise from their kneeling positions beside his throne and make their way to the ring. They get in the ring and fight with (face wrestler), who puts up a decent fight. He turns around into a Kane uppercut, however. Kane brings him to his feet and levels him with (new finishing move). Kane's followers take (face wrestler) backstage with them.

 

The next week, that wrestler is re-christened as a follower of Kane (a la Undertaker's Ministry days). Kane cuts a promo and says that this may seem familiar, as his brother used to do something similar. He says that he and his brother have a lot of parallels in their wrestling careers. However, he has never won the big matches like his brother, and the one time that he lucked into the title in a First Blood match, he didn't possess it longer than 24 hours. However, his brand of Hell has him as the unquestioned ruler, and to rule in the wrestling world means you hold the championship. He will "convert" one of our beloved wrestlers one at a time until he is given his rightful shot at the title.

 

Kane terrorizes the roster over the next few weeks, chokeslamming wrestlers from the ring to the floor, "breaking" their arms, and injuring people right and left. Kane's "conversion" hasn't brought anyone over to his side with the exception of that first wrestler. It's been more about wreaking havoc and clearing the path for the battle with the champ. The champ says he will fight Kane for the belt if it means he will stop the destruction. They have the match and Kane wins convincingly after proving to be much faster and more mobile than he was before, yet still being able to overpower his foe. He dominates toward the end of the match and hits his finisher for the win and the title. He holds the belt for several months while having a dominate reign and destroying everyone in his path. Undertaker has not crossed his brother's path during this time, but finally comes out when Kane is about to have another wrestler set on fire. Undertaker says he is the man that can end Kane's rule over his own personal Hell. Kane says that this was what he wanted all along. He wanted to come back and be not only as good as his brother, but better than his brother ever had been. He wants their fate decided by one final encounter, where the loser is gone from wrestling forever: Hell in a Cell retirement match.

 

Personally, I would have Kane lose the match and be banished by Undertaker. At the next Wrestlemania, Taker finally loses and is getting beat down after the match just to cement even further the rub that the wrestler who ended his streak will get. Kane comes out for the save, he and Undertaker hug, and Taker announces that he is retiring from wrestling now that his streak has ended. Paul Bearer comes out with the urn, the lights go out, and when they come back, Kane and Taker are both gone.

 

 

 

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Is this a gimmick account?

 

Is this a rhetorical question?

 

Do you always answer a question with a question?

So what if he does?

 

Did I say it was a problem?

 

Am I a mind reader?

 

Is there a point to this?

 

Why do you ask?

 

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Is this a gimmick account?

 

Is this a rhetorical question?

 

Do you always answer a question with a question?

So what if he does?

 

Did I say it was a problem?

 

Am I a mind reader?

 

Is there a point to this?

 

Why do you ask?

 

You aren't enjoying it?

 

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I'm saddened my suggestion was ignored. It was that or Kane becomes a Scientologist.

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