Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 PRESENTED IN HD FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY -OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT- We're brought right to Sofa Central where Arsenal jersey clad Double C wait to kick off the action! COLE Welcome, folks, to the highest rated sports entertainment show on television, OAOAST HeldDOWN, I am Michael Cole, and with me is Johnathan Coachman! COACH ESPN Personality, Johnathan Coachman. COLE Well, the next Stuart Scott and I are happy to have you here tonight and we start this high octane evening off with a United States Title match between two rising stars! Master Blaster (Jammin') hits, and Denzel Spencer gets a warm reception as he comes through the curtains. COLE Denzel Spencer on a roll as of late, and now gets a shot at his first title! Let's go to Michael Buffer! BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the OAOAST United States championship! Coming to the ring at this time, is the challenger! From Montego Bay, Jamaica, weighing in at 220 pounds...DENNNNNNNZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LL SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSPENCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRR!!!!! COLE And Denzel Spencer with another big match coming up at the Great Angle Bash, as it was revealed that he will be one of the men on Alfdogg's team in the big War Games match against the Deadly Alliance! COACH He's getting in way over his head, Cole! A few upset victories, and now he's got an ego bigger than Buckingham Palace! Spencer rolls in the ring, and poses on the buckles, to the cheers of the fans. He then prepares for the match, as Oh No hits, and Todd Cortez makes his way out. BUFFER His opponent...from Hollywood Boulevard, weighing in at 226 pounds...he is the OAOAST United States champion...THE URBAN LEGEND, TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODD COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!! Cortez climbs into the ring and taunts some fans in the front row, then hands the referee his belt, and he raises it in the air, then calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* Cortez springs into action, attacking Spencer from behind with forearms and a European uppercut. He whips Spencer into the ropes, then drops down, and attempts a hiptoss. However, Spencer spins through, and takes him down with an armdrag! COLE Great counter by Denzel Spencer! Cortez quickly gets to his feet, and charges Spencer, who leapfrogs him, then drops down and catches him with a reverse monkey flip! Cortez gets up at the ropes, where Spencer hits him with a cross body, taking both men to the floor! Spencer climbs back into the ring, and runs to the other side of the ring, then comes back and rolls over the ropes, landing on the apron, but hesitates, and Cortez yanks him off onto the floor! COACH Todd was ready for that one, and Denzel took a rough fall there! Cortez stomps away at Spencer, then picks him up and rams him into the steel steps! COLE Denzel sent right into the steel stairs! Cortez rolls Spencer inside, then climbs onto the apron, and catapults in with a somersault senton splash! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Cortez backs Spencer into a corner, and fires off a few kicks, then brings him out and shoots him into the ropes. Spencer ducks a clothesline, and hits Cortez with a dropkick! He then runs to the ropes, and attempts a handspring elbow, but Cortez duck the elbow, and catches Spencer, executing a back suplex! COACH Wow! COLE Beautiful counter by Todd Cortez! Cortez follows up with a Russian legsweep, followed by a legdrop! COLE VINTAGE Todd Cortez, with that legsweep/legdrop combo! Cortez covers... 1... 2... Kickout! Cortez whips Spencer into the ropes, and catches him with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Todd Cortez throwing everything at the challenger, but he can't keep him down for the three! Cortez climbs out to the apron, and waits for Denzel to get to his feet. When he does, he springboards, and attempts a SHOOTING STAR LARIAT~!...but Spencer catches him in mid-air with a dropkick! COLE BIG dropkick by Denzel Spencer! COACH Wow, that could be it, Cole! Spencer caught him good! Spencer crawls over, and covers... 1... 2... NO! Shoulder up! COLE But Cortez JUST gets the shoulder up! Cortez rolls to the outside, and as he gets to his feet, Denzel springboards out of the corner, and flies at Cortez with a bodypress...but this time, it's him that gets caught with a Cortez dropkick! COACH Hah! Denzel got hit with a taste of his own medicine there! Cortez picks up Spencer, and whips him into the steel guardrail! He then rolls him inside, and whips him into the ropes. Spencer ducks a clothesline, then Cortez drops down, and catches Spencer coming with a SITOUT SPINEBUSTER~! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Cortez backs Spencer into a corner, and delivers some kicks. He then delivers a right hand...but Spencer returns fire! COLE And look at Denzel fight back! Spencer fires off more rights, then spins Cortez around into the corner and delivers some kicks of his own! He then sets up an Irish whip, but Cortez reverses, and Spencer flips into the buckles, and lands in a tree of woe position! COACH Uh-oh, he's caught now, though! Cortez moves in on Spencer, and lays in some kicks to the midsection. He then backs into the opposite corner, and charges with a sliding dropkick...but Spencer sits up, and Cortez crotches the ringpost! COACH Oh no! COLE And some bad consequences for Todd Cortez on that attempt! Cortez climbs down on the outside, as Spencer gets free and stands up on the top rope, with his back to Cortez, and hits a SKY TWISTER PRESS~! COLE Denzel Spencer far from out of it in this match! Spencer calls out to the crowd, which roars in response, then rolls Cortez back inside, and attempts an Irish whip. Cortez reverses, then attempts a tilt-a-whirl. Spencer lands on his feet, however, and delivers a foot to the gut, followed by a SCISSOR KICK~! Denzel waits for Cortez to get to this feet, and catches him with a HURRICANRANA, hooking the legs... 1... 2... NO! Kickout! COLE WOW! SO close! Cortez gets to his feet, and catches Spencer with a clothesline! COACH But how about Todd Cortez coming right back? COLE That's impressive! Cortez scoops up Spencer in powerslam position, and carries him over to the ropes. Spencer struggles, then negotiates his way into a headscissors, taking Cortez over the top to the floor! Spencer then runs to the ropes, and executes a NO-HANDS SOMERSAULT PLANCHA, hooking Cortez on the way down, and taking him down with a HEADSCISSORS~! COLE/COACH CROWD HO-LY SHIT~! HO-LY SHIT~! HO-LY SHIT~! HO-LY SHIT~! After a few seconds rest, Spencer slowly gets to his feet, and rolls Cortez back inside. He positions him in a corner, and executes a SPLIT-LEGGED MOONSAULT~! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Shoulder up! Denzel makes a signal to the crowd. COLE Could be time for the Carribean Compactor! Could we see a new champion right here? Denzel scoops him up, but Cortez slips behind the back, then catches him with a BIG powerbomb, holding on for the pin... 1... 2... NO! Kickout! COLE Denzel, how did he kick out of that??? Cortez gripes to the referee, then whips Denzel into the buckles. He charges, but Denzel steps out, and catapults Cortez over his own head, and Cortez lands on the turnbuckle! Spencer then hits a jumping sidekick! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Denzel rolls to the apron, then gets to his feet. He springboards in, but gets caught in a chokehold...as Cortez executes the URBAN ASSAULT~!!!111 COACH The Urban Assault! 1... 2... NO!!! Shoulder up! COLE But Denzel still comes out! COACH I can't believe this! Cortez picks up Spencer, and sets him on the top in the corner. He climbs up after him, but gets met with right hands! COLE Denzel trying to fight it off! However, Cortez fights back with forearm strikes, and climbs all the way up. COACH Could be a superplex! Denzel blocks with fists to the gut, then reaches his free arm between the legs of Cortez...and drills him with a CARRIBEAN COMPACTOR FROM THE TOP ROPE~!!!!!11111 COACH COLE The Carribean Compactor! From the top rope! Denzel crawls over, and hooks the leg... 1... 2... 3!!! *DING DING DING* COLE HE GOT IT!!! We've got a new champion! BUFFER The winner of match...and NEWWWWWWWWWWWW OAOAST United States champion...DENNNNNNNZZZZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LL LL SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSPENCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRR!!!!! The crowd is insane as Denzel receives the belt from the referee and Master Blaster (Jammin') plays. COLE What an outstanding match, and Denzel Spencer continues his hot streak, with his finest moment! His first championship in the OAOAST! COACH I just can't believe this. Denzel climbs to the outside, and into the front row to celebrate with some fans. COLE Well, those people could believe it, and that's why Denzel's in the position he's in right now! Denzel climbs back into the ring area, and makes his way back up the aisle. COLE A big night for Denzel Spencer, and now, in just ten days, he goes to war with the Deadly Alliance! COACH Well, I think his big "hot streak" is going to be extinguished come the Great Angle Bash, Cole! COLE We'll find out, but for right now, Denzel Spencer is going to celebrate his first championship! Denzel walks up the aisle, hardly able to take his eyes off his new title. Which distracts him from a commotion back in the ring, as someone hops the barrier, again raising questions over security. Although nobody seems quick to stop the bigman responsible. COLE Wait... that's that Tommy G guy, again! Tommy G slides into the ring behind an unsuspecting Todd Cortez and from behind, bull-rushes him chest first into the turnbuckles! Cortez rolls away clutching his chest as Tommy G stares into the crowd, casually stepping up onto the middle rope. He sits, waiting for Todd to get up, eyes glaring at his target. And when Todd picks himself up, Tommy takes off with a FLYING TORNADO DDT!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" COLE That DEVESTATING DDT, just like last week! Rolling out of the ring, Tommy G hops back over the barricade before security can come after him and he disappears through the people once again, leaving Cortez hurt in the ring once more. COLE This guy is seemingly following us, following Todd Cortez around the world and laying him to waste, for reasons that are beyond me! At first I thought it may have had something to do with the United States Title, but apparantly this man has, for whatever reason, targetted The Urban Legend specifically. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 And now, FRUTTI PEBBLES cereal presents the OAOAST SPINEBUSTER OF THE WEEK! LAST WEEK Rocked by a series of roundhouses, Bosley is BAAAAAAAACK body dropped, then clotheslined outside where he reaches into his pant leg and pulls out a TELESCOPIC BATON! COACH Business is about to pickup, baby boy. Bosley sprints to the other side of the ring and CLOBBERS Moss! Meanwhile, Benjamin levels CPA with a TOP ROPE CLOTHESLINE and makes the cover. ONE! TWO! * TWHACK * "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Sonuva…! * DINGDINGDING * Though the bell has sounded Bosley continues his assault. COLE Somebody stop this! CPA gets in on the act as OAOAST officials swarm the ring. The damage done VICE take the tag titles with them. COLE VICE adding insult to injury. COACH Yeah, they not only beat respect into Team Heyross, they also took their tag team championship! VICE hold the titles overhead as we... …cut to our backstage interview area. There OAOAST Original Tony Brannigan is joined by VICE, the One & Only World tag team title around their shoulders. BRANNIGAN If a picture is worth a thousand words, then video footage must be worth a million. Snubbed in their eyes by Team Heyross, my guests vowed to teach, or rather BEAT respect into them. What occurred next was the definition of highway robbery. I thought it wasn’t about the tag titles? CPA Isn’t a person allowed to change their mind, man? Yeah, the tag straps weren’t part of our mission objective, but they were just sitting there all alone. BRANNIGAN I didn’t know you were such a sensitive guy. BOSLEY You wanna be a clown, go to the circus. Right now you’re hanging with the One & Only World tag team champions, so show a little respect. Unless of course you’d like to end up like the other two clowns who disrespected us. BRANNIGAN I remind you, gentlemen, just because you stole the titles doesn’t mean you’re the champions. CPA (laughs) Can you believe this guy? BOSLEY He’s like the rest of them, always hating. But I remind YOU that possession is 9/10ths of the law, Brannigan. And who’s got possession? Hmm? BRANNIGAN (under breath) You do. CPA Yo, man, I think I’m hard of hearin’. So help a brother out and say that again. Louder. BRANNIGAN You do! BOSLEY It‘s gotta suck being wrong. We’re outta here. VICE exit as Brannigan watches on. LATER TONIGHT ROCK N ROLL EXPRESS CHRIST AIR EXPRESS VS THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS AND ABDULLAH ABIR NERDLY TONIGHT! TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT OAOAST WORLD TITLE KRISTA ISADORA VS UNO TONIGHT! COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 Coming back from break and image of the largest city in England greets us Rock Your Baby hits, as the lights go out and the giant multi-colored disco ball comes down from the ceiling. A haze-like smoke fills the entryway, and Vinny Valentine struts through, followed by Biff Atlas and Tony Tourettes. COLE Back on HeldDOWN with some tag team action! Let's go to Michael Buffer! BUFFER The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Making their way to the ring, accompanied by Tony Tourettes, at a combined weight of 448 pounds...the team off BIFF ATLAS and VINNY VALENTINE...PANIC AT THE DISSSSSSSSSSSSCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Vinny slides into the ring, and starts to get down. BUFFER Their opponents, already in the ring, from Glasgow, Scotland, at a combined weight of 430 pounds...DANNY BOY and SCOTTISH SCOTT, THE LAST KINGS OF SSSSSSSSSSSSCOTLANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND!!!!! The lights come back on, and everybody gets down to their ring gear, then the referee calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* Vinny and Scott tie-up, and Scott backs Vinny into a corner. Vinny turns Scott around, then backs off. He throws a right hand, which Scott blocks, and starts firing off rights of his own! A big right sends Vinny down to the mat, as Biff and Danny both jump into the ring. The Kings back Vinny and Biff into opposite corners, and whip them towards one another. Vinny and Biff DOSIE-DO~!, but run right into dropkicks! Vinny and Biff then stagger back into another dosie-do, resulting in dropkicks from the opposite team members! Vinny and Biff roll to the outside as the crowd cheers on the Kings! COLE The Last Kings of Scotland with some nice teamwork, and Vinny and Biff out to the floor! Vinny and Biff regroup, and Biff sneaks in and attacks Scott from behind with a double axhandle! COACH Biff with a shot from behind, can you imagine the force behind those blows, Cole? COLE Oh, please. Biff picks up Scott, and executes a vertical suplex. He then backs into the ropes, and goes for an elbowdrop, but Scott rolls out of the way! COLE Scott looking to make a tag here to his partner Danny Boy... However, Biff manages to grab the foot, and makes a tag to Vinny, who drops an elbow to the back! COLE And now Vinny Valentine in the ring! Vinny picks up Scott, and executes a backbreaker, then picks him up around the waist and rams him into the corner. COACH And Vinny working over the back of Scottish Scott! Vinny makes a tag to Biff, who comes in with a Canadian backbreaker. COLE The formerly named "Safety Lock" applied by Biff Atlas, continuing to work the back! Scott manages to get his feet on the ropes, and pushes himself off, landing in front of Biff, and delivering some right hands. Biff makes a blind tag to Vinny, then reverses the Irish whip, and drops down. Scott hops over, right into a Vinny stun gun! COACH I'll tell you, Vinny and Biff looking really good in this match! Vinny covers... 1... 2... Danny Boy saves! COLE And Danny Boy breaking up the count! The referee forces Danny Boy out, as Biff comes back in for a double-team Irish whip, but Scott ducks a clothesline, and bowls over both guys with a flying bodypress! He then crawls over and makes the tag to Danny Boy! COLE And there's a tag! Danny Boy comes in and hits Vinny with right hands, then backs into the ropes, and floors him with a running forearm! Cover... 1... 2... Biff saves! Scott jumps Biff from behind, and it's a four-man brawl in the ring, but the crowd has their eyes on the entryway, and Reject leading a massive Russian wrestler to the ring. COLE Wait a minute! Here comes Reject, but who is that with him? Reject points to the ring, and the big man climbs onto the apron and over the top rope, then starts a MASSIVE clothesline to Danny Boy, followed by one to Biff! COACH Look at the big man dominate! *DING DING DING* COLE And the referee with no choice but to throw this one out! The big man then floors Vinny with a MAFIA KICK, then picks up Scott in a fireman's carry, spinning him around, then catching him with a SPEAR in mid-air! COACH WOW, what a move that was! The big man holds his arms out, and lets a monstrous roar out to the crowd. He then grabs Danny Boy by the throat, lifting him off the mat, right onto his shoulders, and executing a SITOUT POWERBOMB~! The big man gets to his feet, where he comes face-to-face with Tony Tourettes. COACH Tony better get out of there.. TONY YOU FAGGOT! WE HAD IT WON! WE WERE GONNA MAKE 'EM PLAY BAGPIPES OUT THEIR ASSHOLE! ACK... The "ack" comes as a result of the big man's hand to his throat, but Tony escapes harm as a result of a top rope elbowsmash from Vinny, which has no effect on the big man, but causes him to turn his attention, as he drills Vinny with a running headbutt! COLE And this big man, under the order of Reject, has caused major carnage in the ring! The Wall by Kansas plays, as the big man lets out another roar, and Reject grabs one of his hands as he raises it. COLE We hope to find out more about this monster as the show goes on! But right now, let's go to... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 Backstage in the Enterprise dressing room, a suit clad Theodore Moneymaker paces across the well adorned room. CMJ and Spencer Reiger relax on one leather couch, while Lorelei DeCenzo and Christian Wright MONEYMAKER I’ve gathered us all here today because there has been a gross error made in this very organization. There are sharks in our waters and we sit in the middle of the deadly ocean with spongebob square pants booties on our bodies. We above all else have placed ourselves in a position where all paths that are available lead directly to out and out failure. It is truly a shame a group that has owned sports and entertainment with a firm iron cast grip is reduced to being swindled by a tree hugging hippy fitness model. What’s even more troubling and shameful is that everyone of you is directly responsible. CMJ MONEYMAKER Yes you to, Collin. When The Enterprise had Ned, Simon, Molly, Lorelei, Christian, Alix, and CPA and Bosley everything ran with the precision and perfection of big ben. But I change the lineup around and I am thrown into chaos. The previous incarnations never let me so blindly place my faith in the hands of a woman who exists only to spurn my affections and torment my heart. REIGER I tried to tell you last week, women can’t be trusted. Never, ever. MONEYMAKER Fault your lack of conviction in your words. Lay no blame at my feet. Reiger just grumbles in response, until Christian elbows him in the side. REIGER Uh….Sorry. MONEYMAKER There will be time for retributions, my friends! Our moment of ultimate victory nears with each passing second. I have negotiated with Josie a showdown at The Great Angle Bash. I will put up my shares in FIT with KID and our dear Krista will put up her world title. Who walks away with the prizes is my choice and mine alone. I own this destiny! LORELEI Teddy, that’s great! MONEYMAKER It goes above great. It goes to history defining. I promise to all of you success no matter what the cost in human casualty. I will let nothing and nobody stand in the way of my domination over Krista’s domain. I will not fail, and I will be stopped by no man. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 Backstage in a secluded area we find.... MORGAN NERDLY Backstage we find Morgan looking much more cheerful than usual and talking on her blackberry MORGAN Hi, my name is Katie Phillips! I work here in the arena, is this Claude Jones, chief audio technician? CLAUDE Yeah. MORGAN I found some wiring where I’m at, and it all has your name on it. Would you like me to bring it back to you? CLAUDE I can come and get it. MORGAN You can? That’s super! CLAUDE On my way now. CLICK! Morgan frowns as she stashes her blackberry into her purse. LATER TONIGHT OAOAST WORLD TITLE KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN VS UNO TONIGHT! COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 We return from break with an image of the lovely English city "Heart Shaped Box" by Nirvana begins to waft through the arena to a loud chorus of boos. And little wonder. Big smiles on their faces, Logan and Synth appear waving pieces of paper, which a closer camera shot shows us are "MISSING PERSON" posters with Jamie O'Hara's face on them and a massive $5 reward for any information. The Heavenly Rockers try to hand out their fliers, with little success, on their way to the ring with Abdullah, in ring gear, and Holly behind. BUFFER The following contest is a three on two Handicap Match, set for one fall. Introducing team number one. Accompanied to the ring by HOLLY! First, the only rock n' wrestling band that matters... SYNTH ABDUL-JABBAR... LOGAN “MACHO MACHO” MANN… THE HHHEEEEEEEAAAAAVVVEEEEENNLLLLYYYYYYYY... RRRRRRROOOOOOOCCKKEEEEERRRRRRRSSSSSSS!!! And their tag team partner for the night, "THE SPEAKER FOR THE PROPHETS", ladies and gentlemen ABDULLAH AABBIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRR... NNEEERRRRRDDLLLLYYYYY!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Entering the ring, Logan breaks out into air guitar while Synth takes a microphone. SYNTH LONDON ENGLAAAAAAAANNDD!!! Synth raises the microphone high in the air and bangs his head, rocking out to... boos. Logan takes the microphone from him with a smug smile on his face. LOGAN Right now we wanna take it down a notch and get serious for a lil' minute. See, we'v... HEY, SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTHS!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Ever the hothead, Logan is calmed down by his more spiritual partners as the crowd's heckling gets to him. LOGAN See, we've been in England for a few days now and we're worried. We're real worried. We've looked high and low, in every club, every bar, every stadium we've been to. And #we stiiiilll... haven't found... who we're lookin' fooorrrr#!! And... well, we got so worried, we eventually had to file a missing person's report! Has anybody in this arena seen Jamie O'Hara? COLE Oh come on. LOGAN Last seen walking towards obscurity with his hands in those ridiculously deep pockets of his! His only two friends in the world are desperately waiting for your information. So we encourage you to search your gutters and your homeless shelters and if you know of his whereabouts, please, laugh in his face for us. Thank you! The already hostile crowd get even further on The Heavenly Rockers' backs as they laugh it up at the expense of their countryman. The noise in the arena turns to cheers when "Like The Angel" by Rise Against powers out. Jogging onto the stage, The Christ Air Express glare at their opponents for a few seconds, before setting off their blue and orange pyro rockets with the leaping double high-five. BUFFER And their opponents... from Edmonton, Alberta Canada! Accompanied to the ring by MELODY NERDLY! Total combined weight, three hundred and seventy pounds... the team of MARV and MEL... THE CHRIST AIR EEEEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXPPRRRRRREEEEEESSSSSSSSS!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" Making a determined walk to the ring, MARV and MEL don't rush in, realising they're outnumbered. COLE I didn't think it were possible, but The Heavenly Rockers have somehow made themselves less popular than they arrived here in London. And it's mainly they're doing which means MARV and MEL don't have their buddy Jamie to call on, here in his home country of England. COACH Oh yes, it's aaalll Logan and Synth's fault that he's in hiding, too ashamed to show his face. Nothing to do with poor self esteem or a lack of balls, it's all the nasty men's fault. Did you get picked on in school by any chance? COLE Why do people keep asking me that!? MARV and MEL enter the ring, as Melody catches up with her brothers and takes her place at ringside. *DINGDINGDING!* Melody tries to encourage her brothers despite the odds as MARV starts off with Logan. "LO - GAN SUCKS!" "LO - GAN SUCKS!" "LO - GAN SUCKS!" "LO - GAN SUCKS!" Riled up, Logan gets into it with the crowd. They lock up and Logan knees MARV in the gut, before measuring a right hand. MARV falls against the ropes and already confident, Logan does a twirl before he whips MARV to the ropes. Unfortunately for Logan, his twirling isn't over, as MARV flips him over with a flying headscissors! Still twirling, but now spinning out of control, Logan gets dropkicked, twice, sending him bailing to the outside. Synth comes in but suffers the same fate as MARV drops down, sending Synth into the path of a Missile Dropkick from MEL!! And Abdullah wisely bails out after thinking of coming in and being spotted by his brothers. "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE They may be a man down, but The Christ Air Express is still blasting along at top speed! THR and Abdullah regroup on the floor before Logan is sent back in. He asks for a test of strength, only to try and kick MARV in the gut... and gets CAUGHT! COLE Logan caught with his hand, or more accurately his foot, in the cookie jar! Reaching back MARV tags MEL and together they trip Logan up, holding one leg each and MAKING A WISH!! A quivering Logan rolls outside and Synth again rushes in, again unwisely as The CAE MAKE A WISH on him too! They turn to Abdullah, who again thinks twice about coming in. COLE Things not going the way of The Heavenly Rockers so far. COACH Well that's because MARV and MEL are doing what they always do, being the 'tag team specialists', two on ones. But eventually that two on one'll become two on three and we'll see how great they are then. Once they've recovered, The Heavenly Rockers return to the ring and Logan lets Synth take over. MARV brings in MEL and the new legal men lock up, Synth grabbing a side headlock and getting shot off into the ropes. A shoulder tackle knocks MEL down. MEL quickly flips over, forcing Synth up and over coming off the ropes. The slightly elder twin then leapfrogs Synth and turns it into a sunset flip as he comes down! COLE Tremendous body control! 1... 2... No! Synth sidesteps MEL and waits for him to come off the ropes, ducking his head. Coming to a stop, MEL pulls Synth up and tries to send him to the ropes instead. But a reversal from Synth sends MEL off, into dangerous territory where Abdullah lifts a knee into the small of his adopted brother's back! MEL quickly turns around but by that time Abdullah is a safe distance away and playing distraction while Logan comes around and guillotines MEL across the top rope!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Having kept the ref tied up, Synth rushes over and covers... 1... 2... Kickout! Referee Charles Robinson has to put an agitated MARV out, allowing Logan and Synth to put the boots to MEL, one from the apron and one from the ring. COLE This is the numbers advantage you were talking about Coach, except instead of three on two, it's three on one. COACH Whatever, it's all good. Synth makes a tag to Logan to cover up their wrong-doing and the MACHO Macho Mann comes in off the top with a flying double axehandle on the trapped MEL. Another cover... 1... 2... No! Snapmared over, MEL is hit with a fistdrop before Logan goads MARV into the ring. That allows Synth and Abdullah to drop from the apron and with a leg a-piece, drag MEL GROIN FIRST INTO THE RINGPOST!! As MEL writhes in pain, Abdullah and Synth sink to their knees in solemn prayer. COLE Give me a break! How disingenuous can you get? Logan drags MEL out for another cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Now that MEL is suitably hurt and after a couple of elbows driven into the back of his neck, Abdullah is confident enough to ask for a tag. And he gets it, to a chorus of boos. COLE Sure, now that one of his adopted brothers is incapacitated, Abdullah will come in to add insult to injury. Abdullah, ring rusty after his transformation from bad wrestler to manager, walks around MEL and picks his spots with a couple of stomps. Raising his hands to the skies, he gives thanks for his stomping abilities. The moment MEL kicks out at him, Abdullah quickly heads for the hills though, tagging Synth in mid bailing from the ring. And Synth cuts MEL off from a tag with an elbow to the back of the head. COLE So much for Abdullah's worth in this match. COACH He probably just got an urgent message from one of his gods. COLE Yeah, something along the lines of "RUN!" Synth whips MEL to the ropes and hooks him down with a clothesline to put MEL back on the defensive. He goes for the pin... 1... 2... No. With a scoop and a slam, Synth places MEL where he wants him and starts to head to the top. When he gets there, he pulls down his goggles and prepares to fly. However, objects start flying at him, distracting him. He looks down at the arena floor to find Melody Nerdly, flicking PORK RINDS at him! COACH What is she doing with those out here!? COLE Mid-match snack I suppose. And Synth is freaking out, the convert vegetarian! Abdullah rushes around to confront his adopted sister, screaming at her use of "THE DEVIL FOOD". And he gets a pork rind flicked at him for his troubles! COACH Religious intolerance sure is funny. All this distraction allows MEL to recover and CROTCH Synth on the top turnbuckle!! In comes Logan to prevent MEL from tagging though, attacking him from behind. Logan works MEL over with clubbing blows before setting him up, looking for a Piledriver. MEL counters with a double leg trip though and with a slingshot, he send Logan to the corner, CAUSING HIM TO HEADBUTT SYNTH IN THE CROTCH!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE As if the first one wasn't bad enough. MEL quickly rolls and MAKES THE TAG, bringing in MARV! Leaping into the ring, MARV hits a running dropkick to the back of Logan, causing him to stagger out of the corner. Scaling the ropes MARV goes after Synth and after some forearms, he pulls him from the top with an armdrag, sending him tumbling RIGHT DOWN INTO LOGAN!! The Heavenly Rockers end up in a heap as MARV heads to the top rope looking to capitalise. COLE The tide has turned and MARV is looking to get high! COACH Do you have to make that joke every week? Waiting for Logan and Synth to pick themselves up, MARV soars with a Flying Crossbody, pinning both men down... 1... 2... Double kickout! MARV hits the ropes and ducks underneath a double clothesline... and then gets tripped up by Abdullah from the outside! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE And again, the numbers game! The Heavenly Rockers quickly pick MARV back up and throw him to the ropes. A double hiptoss is flipped out of by MARV though. He elbows both opponents in the jaw, then bursts forward and dives through the ropes, WIPING OUT ABDULLAH WITH A SUICIDE DIVE!!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" MEL slides into the ring and takes the fight to Logan, MARV eventually joining him to go after Synth. The CAE whip THR into the ropes and duck their heads for stereo backdrops, but both get caught in front facelocks! Synth and Logan look over at each other and get ready to deliver stereo Percussion... but MARV fights out of Synth's grip with bodyshots. He thrown an enziguri... which Synth ducks, only for LOGAN to take the kick to the back of the head! That allows MEL to backdrop Logan and escape. COLE A near escape for MARV and MEL. With Logan down, MEL dives at his partner MARV, who catches him in a wheelbarrow. As MEL pushes up, MARV throws his twin brother away, towards Synth who he catches by the head and hits a Front Lungblower, LANDING ON LOGAN WITH A SENTON IN THE PROCESS!!!!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE! What a move that was! Both Logan and Synth clutch their chests as they're dragged towards corners by the brothers, who head up top. COLE And now MARV and MEL going up, looking to finish this one off by getting some Christ Air! MEL lines up Synth, MARV lining up Logan, ready to dive... ...but Abdullah appears and from the apron, he shoves MEL off the top and for a flip! COACH One down. Momentarily distracted, MARV recovers to take off with the Shooting Star Press... NOBODY HOME!! COACH Two down. Synth crawls over and he quickly slaps MARV in the Camel Clutch, while Abdullah stands and berates MARV right up in his face, despite referee Robinson insisting that he get out of the ring. COLE The referee has lost all control here, he needs to get people out of here. COACH You weren't complaining when MARV and MEL were doing their thing. COLE That was two on two and at that point, you can go by referee's discretion, but this is totally different. Shooing away the referee Abdullah continues to berate MARV, while Logan goes after MEL. Picking him up, Logan twirls the dreaded finger as he prepares to set MEL up for Percussion. Suddenly though, a figure jumps the barricade. To initial confusion, a masked figure. COACH Seriously, do we not have ANY security anymore!? The crowd suddenly rise to their feet as the masked figure scampers up the turnbuckles. And just as Logan sets MEL up in the front facelock, the masked person leaps off the top with a BLOCKBUSTER NECKBREAKER, all out of sight of the referee!!!! "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" COACH WHAT IS THAT!? COLE Was that who I think it is!? COACH ...NO! MEL floats over on top of Logan and with the strangely familiar masked man staying out of sight, the referee turns around... 1... 2... 3!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" *DINGDINGDING!* MEL rolls out of the ring before Synth can get to him and as he and Abdullah freak out, The Christ Air Express escape with the win. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the match... THE CHRIST AAAAIIIIIIRRRRRRRR... EEEEXXXXPPRRRREEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" The Christ Air Express catch up to their masked assistant in the aisle and it's HUGS ALL ROUND to roaring cheers from the London crowd, with Abdullah and Holly going mad in the ring. Melody, huffing and puffing, catches up with her half-bag of pork rinds to celebrate. COLE The munchies are catered for, the celebrations are on and The Christ Air Express are winners, thanks to... who we can only assume is Jamie O'Hara! COACH Of COURSE it's Jamie O'Hara! He can hide his face, but he can't hide those scrawny chicken legs and spaghetti arms! Thhat punk has no business being here... COLE Yes he does! COACH Not under a MASK he doesn't! The celebrations at getting one over on The Heavenly Rockers continue from the trio in the aisle, the London crowd certainly sure that the man under the mask is their fellow Brit. Abdullah seems sure too and rages at the referee to overturn the decision, but that's not going to happen and he's left to curse the name Jamie O'Hara, again. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 Backstage in a women’s rest room Morgan has Claude the sound guy immobilized on his back on a wodden board. His head is inclined downwards, and Morgan pours water over the face and into his breathing passages. I.E. he's being water boarded. MORGAN Tell me who hurt Lorelei! CLAUDE I don’t know! MORGAN You have to know! You’re the only one who can know! You and the camera guy were the first two people on the scene, you saw who did it. You must have. CLAUDE I can’t tell you! I just can’t! MORGAN You have to tell me, there’s no choice. I have to know. I can’t go back to Lorelei and act like I don’t know. What will she think of me? You have to tell me. Now! Now! CLAUDE It was no one. Nobody did it. She faked the whole thing. She said I’d be fired if I told. MORGAN Don’t lie to me! I’ve been lied to all my life. I just want someone to tell me the truth. CLAUDE I am! Check and see if there’s any bruises. You’ll see! MORGAN LIAR! ZAAAAAAAAAAP! COACH Yo that dude just got murked! You know water and electricity don't match. That dude dead! Zaaap AHHHHHH burned skin, son, burned skin! Obama and the UN couldn't save you this time nigga! Taliban be getting more human treatment than Claude the sound guy, fuck kinda name is Claude anyway, I'd swing on that nigga if I ever saw him again. COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 COLE Two weeks ago, after regaining and then losing the OAOAST World Title in the space of 5 minutes, Leon Rodez was in a dejected and callous mood. And among those who felt the wrath of that mood was his own niece, Jade Rodez-Duncan... Leon trails off and his head sinks down into his shoulders. The reason being the appearance of Jade Rodez-Duncan, wearing a worried expression on her face. She kneels down next to her uncle, who flinches wishing she wasn't so close. JADE We need to talk. LEON No we don't. JADE Yes... yes we do Leon. This isn't right and I can't bear seeing you like this anymore, you have to talk to somebody about this. You're depressed and you need... LEON I don't need to talk. Least of all to you. You're the absolute last person I want to see right now, so why don't you just leave me alone? JADE Because I'm worried about you! Leon slowly looks up and chuckles under his breath. LEON Why the sudden change of heart? JADE What... Leon, please, stop this... LEON Why don't you just run along and go celebrate with Mommy? That's where you'd rather be. It's where you've been the past year, right? You didn't care about me then. I don't need you pretending to give a damn about me now, just to sooth your conscience. Standing up, Leon walks off and leaves his niece behind close to tears. COLE Well one man who took exception to that was Bohemoth, former friend of and In Crowd member with Leon. He set out to confront Leon... until Jade intervened... In the hallways of the arena Jade Rodez-Duncan sits close to tears, being comforted by her burly boyfriend, Bohemoth. JADE I just hate seeing him so... so hurt and so broken up. I didn't go there for my sake, I went for him, honest. I just can't believe he'd think that about me. BOHEMOTH I know, I know. I'm gonna go sort him out. As Bo starts to march off, Jade jumps out of her seat and holds her arm out in his path to stop him. JADE NO! BOHEMOTH Jade, he needs sorting out. He can't talk the way he did to you and get away with it, he needs some sense beating into him. JADE No, please Bo, don't. He doesn't know what he's saying at the moment, he's just angry and he's suffering. This isn't Leon, it's just not him. It's not his fault. He needs our help. He doesn't need anymore problems. Please, don't do anything. Relenting, Bo stands down. BOHEMOTH Fine. But something's gotta be said. First Zack and now you, it ain't right and you know it. I need to have it out with him sooner or later. JADE Promise me you won't hurt him. BOHEMOTH Listen, I can't promise anything. JADE You've got to. You don't understand, what we've got is one thing but... he's my family. Tell me you understand. A little evasive Bo seems to shrug, but Jade is insistant and makes Bo look her in the eyes. JADE If you love me, you'll promise not to hurt him. After a few seconds eye to eye, Bohemoth finally gives in and pecks Jade on the cheek. BOHEMOTH Fine. JADE Thank you. Bohemoth wraps a comforting arm around Jade shoulder and walks her off, still not looking completely convinced. COLE Which all lead us to last week in Tokyo, Japan and a tense showdown. Bohemoth DID infact get some things off of his chest, confronting Leon moments after his victory over the bigman Jumbo. However it soon became clear that Leon didn't care what Bohemoth had to say. Infact, he seemed more intent on getting something else out of Bohemoth. Something more physical... As Bohemoth gets the microphone, Leon doesn't bother to wait around to hear what he has to say and starts to leave, which obviously doesn't sit well. BOHEMOTH HEY! Don't you go anywhere man, because I've got something to say! Stopping halfway through the ropes, Leon slowly steps back inside, still not giving Bohemoth the courtesy of any eye contact. BOHEMOTH You know, I don't know what the hell is going on in your head lately. I don't know what's happening, to make you turn your back on Zack and on me the way you have. That's fine. I'm sure you've got your reasons, crazy as they might be. But I draw the line when you start going around and taking all this crap out on other people, innocent people. Especially when those people include Jade. Leon finally looks over at Bohemoth at the mention of Jade's name, stood in a corner. BOHEMOTH Oh yeah. She told me what happened last week. And I'm sure as hell not going to sit back and accept that. I mean, come on man... that's your niece. And you feel you can talk to her the way you did? Big man all of a sudden, taking your anger out on people who aren't gonna fight back. Well guess what, family or no family, when you mess with Jade, you mess with me. So if you've got something to say, how about you say it to my face if you've got the guts? Huh? How 'bout that? Glancing up, Leon's face shows the hint of a smile as he takes the microphone away from Bohemoth, daring enough to stand right in his face as asked. LEON You're right about one thing. Jade is my family. Which is why I think you aren't going to do a damn thing to me. Raising his eyebrows as if to say "oh yeah?", Bohemoth sure looks ready to do something. Until Leon laughs under his breath. LEON You know what, 'Bo', save the tough man act. You don't scare me. Not one bit. The fact is, you're pathetic. Just like I once was. Look at you. All angry, pent up, on somebody's else's behalf. Always somebody's else's man. Standing in Zack's shadow, just like I was. Before that, standing in Wright's shadow. And now, fighting your girlfriend's battles. I always second guessed whether you really had a brain of your own in that head of yours and I guess we're finding out now, you don't. Well, I do have a mind of my own now. And my mind is telling me things that it should have months ago. If you, or Zack, or Jade don't like it, that's too bad. Sometimes you need to hear those things you don't want to listen to. I mean, we could go into the real story behind why a jacked up 32 year old man is sleeping with a tiny 19 year old girl and what that says about him... Bohemoth's eyes widen, about ready to kill after that cheapshot. But somehow, he doesn't. LEON ...but the fact is, you aren't worth a second of my time. I don't owe you an explanation. I don't owe you any gratitude. And I don't owe you an apology. Leon turns his back on Bohemoth and goes to walk off, but stops, looking over his shoulder. LEON If you've got a problem with that, then go ahead and do your worst. Leaving himself wide open to a sneak attack Leon stands and waits for Bohemoth to make a move. Those in the crowd that understand what's going on urge Bohemoth to take Leon out. But Bohemoth, strangely, can't bring himself to attack Leon and just stands fuming, glaring a hole in the back of his head. LEON That's what I thought. Throwing the microphone back at Bohemoth's feet Leon leaves the ring, a contemptful look on his face as he walks off. Bohemoth stands in the middle of the ring still seething as he watches Leon leave. COACH Wow. Leon called Bo's bluff... and he's walking away in one piece. COLE Bohemoth kept his word and we understand that right now, Leon Rodez is standing by backstage ready to talk to us... We cut to split-screen, finding a darkened space where Leon stands miserably staring down at the floor. Boos sound out in the arena, whether Leon can hear them or not isn't clear as they have no effect. COLE ...and Leon, we've just seen the confrontation between yourself and Bohemoth that took place last week. Now it seemed to me that you were trying to goad Bohemoth into attacking you. And later that night, we heard you telling Jade, you were privy to that conversation she and Bo had and that Bohemoth would "break his promise". Are you really risking infuriating The Monster and putting yourself on the wrong end of his anger to try and prove a point to Jade? LEON Well... that really doesn't matter now, does it? Because if Bohemoth really loves Jade like he says, he won't lay a finger on me. A faintest hint of a smile can be seen as Leon lowers his head. LEON Of course... if it turns that it's all a lie, that would be a shame. It would be a bad thing to happen to such a good person like Jade, don't you agree? It's just lucky that bad things don't happen to good people. COLE Well, we understand from OAOAST upper management that a contract has been drawn up for a match between yourself and Bohemoth at The Great Angle Bash, by request. So far, the match hasn't been signed, but I'm guessing you're behind this request? LEON Let me make this as simple as possible. Sooner or later, Bohemoth will break that promise that he made. No matter how much he insists that he has Jade's best interests in mind. Sooner or later, he will hurt me. And I don't want to get hurt, but I'm resigned to the fact, because if it's something I don't want, you can be sure it'll happen to me. So why the cherade? Why pretend like it won't happen? Why not just get it over with? Leon wipes a hand across his face. LEON Jade needs to realise a couple of things. Things I've realised. She's naive. She still sees the world as this beautiful miracle, she's so full of positivity. She needs to see the world for the cruel, harsh, unforgiving struggle that it really is. And by finding out that the man she believes in won't keep such an important promise, she'll find that out. Because the simple fact is... blood is thicker than water. No matter what Bohemoth says, no matter how many times he says it, he doesn't have her best interests in mind like I do. She is my flesh and my blood. When tested, blood is thicker than water. And the bond that ties me and Jade is a bond that will never break. The bond that ties her and Bohemoth is fragile. It's not built to last. It's only a matter of time... before it snaps. And when it does, I will be there for Jade. And she'll finally understand where I'm coming from and what I'm feeling. Leon raises his eyebrows. LEON Of course, if I'm wrong, Bohemoth won't lay a finger on me and he won't sign that contract to wrestle me at The Great Angle Bash. Shaking his head, that faint smile appears again. LEON I guess we'll see, won't we? COLE Well, uhm, Leon we thank you for joining us. No response from Leon as we go to full screen. COLE That was very ominous, wouldn't you agree? COACH Bohemoth's a hothead. That's what's ominous to me. You think he won't lose his cool and go after Leon? I know where I'd be putting my money. COLE If Leon is as manipulative and scheming as he seems, I'm afraid you may well be right. OAOAST SYNDICATED PREFERABLE TO PAYING CHILD SUPPORT FOR YOUR THREE KIDS BY THREE DIFFERENT WOMEN RETURNING THIS WEEK (MAAAAAAAAYYYYYYBE) COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 In the suddenly sparsely populated Enterprise dressing room, Lorelei and Morgan are engaged in a heated conversation. Lorelei relaxes on a leather couch with glass of wine in hand while Morgan nervously paces the room. MORGAN Why would you lie to me? You said you’d be the one person who never lied to me. You told me out of all the people who don’t care and don’t want me, you’d be the one friend I can count on. LORELEI I don’t necessarily expect you to understand why I did what I did. Why I faked an injury. MORGAN You said you different than anyone in my family. LORELEI I am different. While someone such as Molly would rather see you drugged up zombie, that neither she nor anyone else has to help, I’ve tried to keep the real Morgan alive. You should be thanking me. MORGAN But, you lied. LORELEI So what if I did? MORGAN You said you never would. LORELEI Don't be so naieve. MORGAN You're the only person I can trust, you told me that. LORELEI I did it to help the real you, you could’ve left the camera man and the sound guy alone, but you decided to attack and torture them, because that’s what you as a childlike sociopath do. This world isn’t safe for you. Its dangerous, its dark and it will torment you like its been doing all your life. I know you. I know you want the world to come an end so you can watch everybody suffer. This world is not your friend, its not made for people like you. I didn’t want you to forget that. We lost at School’s Out and I thought you were retreating back to that over-drugged zombie the doctors made you. People like you exist to introduce chaos and order in the world, you're far to different to ever be ordinary. I helped you. And now you have a Great Angle Bash title match against Sophie. This is your chance to live the life beyond what they wanted you to be. Who are you? A docile, broken victim wasting away in the psychiatric dungeon or are you destined for something more. Done with her speech, Lorelei waves Morgan out the room and relaxes with a satisfied grin and a sip of her wine. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 We pan over to the ring where two JOBBERS stand in the corner. Non-point’s cover of “In the Air Tonight” hits and Morgan Nerdly leads out her band of thugs. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring, both hailing from the UK… TONY BROWN and GORDON BLAIR! Hands raised, the home county team receive little reaction. BUFFER And their opponents! Total combine weight 565 pounds, and accompanied by OAOAST Women’s Champion MORGAN NERDLY… DETECTIVE TANGO BOSLEY and CPA... VVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIICE!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" VICE gloat down the aisle carrying the tag titles repossessed last week. As they approach ringside the crowd suddenly roars. * TWHACK * * TWHACK * Tango Bosley and CPA drop like flies after a pair of CHAIRSHOTS FROM TEAM HEYROSS!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" COACH VICE getting assaulted out here, Cole. COLE No, they’re getting what they deserve. Morgan picks up the tag titles and flees the scene as OAOAST officials arrive to restore order. COACH About damn time somebody showed up. All riled up, VICE want them some of Team Heyross and vice versa. COLE Hot as both teams are, I’d say it’s a good bet we’ll see them face-off at the Great Angle Bash. GREAT ANGLE BASH OAOAST WORLD TITLE MATCH: KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN VS THEODORE MONEYMAKER WAR GAMES: DEADLY ALLIANCE VS TEAM ALF WOMEN'S TITLE: SOPHIE VS MORGAN NERDLY COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall and it is for the OAOAST World Championship! Fedde Le Grand’s Creeps begins playing as the entrance stage fills with a block of misty purple smokes. Entering minus his tag partner, is the voodoo warrior Uno. He chants a deadly song of black magic before stepping through his smoke to proceed down the entrance ramp. COLE Uno, profiled in this month’s OAOAST Magazine, it says he loves curry and hummus and has a strong fear of spiders. Arcnaphobia for Uno. But he’s facing something more deadly than a spider , and that’s OAOAST world champion Krista Isadora Duncan for the title belt! COACH Loves hummus and is afraid of spiders, you’re on top of your game tonight, Mikey. Gimme them bright lights, long nights High rise, overtime Gimme them bright lights, long nights Party till the sun is rising High rise, overtime Working 'till the moon is shining Hot guys, fly girls Never gonna say it I feel on top of the world, I feel on top of the world Hey! Dancers dressed in spicy red Buckingham Palace guards thrust and grind ontop of the flashing lights of the entrance stage. Coming out to a raucous ovation from the English crowd, the world champion shows off her union jack based outfit, of a microdress and matching scrunches and bracelets. As the fans continue to cheer the sexy dancers hold Krista aloft, allowing her to throw back her head and relax in their arms. BUFFER And the champion….she is from Los Angeles, California, she is a four time OAOAST tag team champion, a New York Times best selling author, a Hollywood Walk of Famer, the founder of FIT with KID, a loving mother, and world reknowned fitness guru, she is KRISTA ISAAADORAAA DUNCAAAAAAN! Walking like a model on a top of the line fashion show runway, Krista’s photograph is snapped by numerous photo journalists and fans alike. She puts on a welcoming and sweet smile as the lens flares appear on the camera. PATTY ASIDE: LENS FLARES RULE ON SCREEN! GO SEE STAR TREK YOU’LL SEE! YOU’LL ALL SEE! Krista struts her new balance tennis shoes across the open, as the pink and white lights continue to produce flares on the screen. The beauty of the flares is overshadowed by the titillating shot of Krista’s ten million dollar legs hanging her upside down the on the ring ropes. More camera flashes click off, as the Londoners to try to capture the tasty image for totally non-sexual ways. COLE Krista set to defend her world title at the Great Angle Bash against Theodore Moneymaker, but tonight the fighting champion has accepted a title bout with the voodoo master! COACH Uno looks overmatched, but yo he got spells that’ll turn you into a pumpkin, no lyin’. COLE Well its a gigantic opportunity for Uno of Los Conquistadors! DING DING DING A lockup begins the match, and sees Uno managing to shove Krista into a corner. “Nope, nope, nope, nope.” Krista sings. Curious, referee Earl Hebner wonder, “Why are you saying nope?” “The match wasn’t supposed to start this way, we need to reeshoot! Everyone get in their places.” Krista orders and then shoves Uno to the center of the ring. “Okay, now, if you don’t mind, re ring the bell, s’il vous plait.” DING DING DING Krista immediately strikes Uno with a dropkick, that topples him into the canvas. He quickly scrambles to his feet to try and gain his bearings. But failure comes to him when Krista begins shooting her knees into his skull. The blows back Uno into a corner, where the exhausted black magician falls against the turnbuckle posts. While he attempts to regain lost strength, Krista backs towards the opposite corner. After a mighty roar, and a wondering why she even decided to roar, Miss California charges across the ring in an effort to plant her knees permanently on Uno’s face. But the luchadore succeeds in grabbing onto Krista’s slim waist and uses that hold to set the beauty on the turnbuckles. “Call the quarters to begin, protect the Space enclosed within!” Uno begins chanting. “Dishwasher, computer, piano, surfboard.” Krista chimes in, “See, I can say random things also.” His chant interrupted and ruined, a frustrated Uno stomps towards his vexing foe. Unfortunately, the challenger walks straight into a kick to the stomach from the champion. She then backs her tennis shoes up onto the second rope. After mimicking Uno’s “magic hands” the fitness queen flies forward with a cross body block. However Uno recovers midway through her arrival and uses that recovery to twist her to the ground with a powerslam! Earl Hebner counts the resulting fall… ONE! Krista pulls her shoulder off the canvas, earning applause from the fans. But from Uno she earns several painful stomps before the voodoo master brings her towards her feet. He shoves her into a corner, where shoulder charges test defenses of her ultra strong abs. Failing to make a dent against the fitness queen’s six pack, Uno switches his strategy and strikes her in the face with a dropkick. Pained, she topples to the canavs and is pounced on by Uno for a pinfall attempt… ONE! TWO! Krista again finds a way to push herself out the pinfall. Unable to set herself on the attack, she’s pulled upright by Uno and struck with several forearms to the back. Having weakened her with those simple attacks, he attaches her into a front facelock and slings her backwards with a snap suplex. Just as soon she hits the ground, does he bounce off the ropes and comes back with a leg drop to her throat. “LET’S GO KRISTA! LET’S GO KRISTA!” the OAOAST Marks sing. Angered by their chants, Uno directs his rage on Krista by trapping his legs around her in a bodylock. She fights and squirms, pushing herself to her very limit to power out Uno’s harsh hold. She’s able to do enough damage to his grip to get herself out the hold. However, Uno does enough damage with forearms across her neck to keep her grounded. COLE Hard hits by Uno, very hard hits coming in this world title contest. With the damage done to Krista by his powerful forearms, Uno is able to reattach his body lock. Krista cries in pain, the simple hold doing much to wear her energy down. “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” the fans attempt to rally Miss California. Their shouts and cheers do their job; Krista is able to maunveaur her way on top of Uno. Giving the panicked luchadore no chance to reattach his hold, the femme fatale twists him over into a boston crab! COLE A rare submission by our world champion! It’s a hold that’s expiration date comes rather soon with Uno quickly reaching to the ropes. Krista lets him go at the referee’s behest, allowing him to slink to the corner. The second he returns to his feet, Krista charges at him. But right when she reaches him, he ducks his body down and uses that position to flip Krista over the top rope. Fortunately for her and her legion of admirers she’s able to come down on her tennis she’s on the ring apron. Uno attempts to derail her safe landing with a forearm. But Krista’s uses her extreme flexibility to strike him in the head with a kick. As he staggers, backwards dizzied by the kick Krista elevates herself to the top rope. After checking out her lovely face on a closeup on the angle tron, she springs forward and nails Uno to the ground with a swanton press! “YEAAAAAAAAA!” “Rain to me...rain to me... bring water down in soft degree,” Uno begins chanting, “I evoke the element of water….. in the name of MMMMMMMMF” Krista silences Uno by shoving her scrunchie into his mouth! COLE Was he trying to summon a flood? COACH Not only would help wash some of these stink ass brits we’d also get Krista in a wet t-shirt. Uno rolls back to his feet, searing through his mask, angered over having his chant interrupted. He throws a forearm at the beautiful champion, but she uses that arm to launch him into a corner. He collides back first with the ringposts and sags in exhaustion. Krista stands at the center of the ring and treats the fans to a lusty showcase by hiking up her skirt to show bethonged buns. While the crowd cheers the display Krista runs across the ring and uses her buns of steel to blast Uno in the face. “YEAAAAAA!” Uno stumbles about the ring, his groggy state misleading his direction. Its for that reason he walks into an enziguri by Krista. A pin is counted by Hebner… ONE! TWO! Uno gets the shoulder off the canvas, which does not please the pro-Krista London audience. COLE Uno, hanging in there, even though his “spells” haven’t worked thus far. COACH Why do you say spells that way? Why can’t you respect his religious beliefs! Krista and Uno come to their feet, and its Uno who strikes first with a spinning back fist. The blow knocks Krista around, giving Uno the chance to fling her backwards with a side Russian leg sweep. Uno quickly hooks her into a pinning situation… ONE! TWO! Krista kicks out the pin, bringing much frustration to the voodoo master. He grabs hold of her vibrant golden hair and attempts to bring her to her feet. But only halfway up she grabs onto his leather clad legs and trips him to the ground. The fans watch in excitement as the gorgeous vixen twists and turns him into a sharpshooter. COLE Again a submission by Krista, and again that’s something we don’t see very often from her! COACH Probably because she just learned you can submit people last week! “TAP! TAP! TAP!” the Londoners scream in Uno’s ears, but he refuses to act on their demands. He holds firmly, straining himself to fight off the pain. COLE Uno not giving up! “Ahhhh!” Krista shrieks, “Spider!” “Where?!” Uno yells, suddenly panicked by the arrival of his greatest fear. “In front of you!” Krista looks over her shoulder to scream. “I don’t see it!” “That’s because you have a mask on! Hurry and kill it! Its right there in front of you! Kill it! Kill it!” Uno starts bashing his hand against the mat, furiously tapping it to kill a spider he can’t even see. This, however, has a horrid side effect. Uno’s tapping is no different than a wrestler tapping out, and referee Earl Hebner calls for the bell! “YEAAAAAAAAH!” COACH What a dirty trick! BUFFER Your winner as a result of a submission and still OAOAST WORLD CHAMPION….KRISTAAAAA ISADORAAAAAA DUNCAAAAAAAAN! The fans are on their feet cheering for the successful champion. She meets their show of appreciation with a simple twirl and a bow of respect. Once handed her title, her joy stops and she berates Hebner for getting fingerprints on it. That’s our Krista! COLE Out smarted and out classed, Uno just got tricked out of the biggest moment in his career. COACH Damn, son! Why you gonna do something Krista tells you. She facing the opposite direction and she gonna tell you there's a spider in front of you. Ten inches in front of your eyes! Damn! COLE Folks, we'll be back with the fallout from "Spider-gate" COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2009 Understandably furious, Uno and Dos stomp through the backstage area, they say nothing but their clenched fists and quick gait gives away their feelings. Quickly though their path is halted by Theodore Moneymaker and Christian Wright. MONEYMAKER Hello, gentlemen. DOS Good evening, sir. MONEYMAKER It is not a good evening. Not for you, not for me, not for anyone who wishes to establish a peaceful and morally correct order in the OAOAST. WRIGHT We happened to watch the televisual transmission of your prior joust. It was in a word, devastating to heart and soul. A humiliation our eyes would recede from if we had not set them to the chore of observation. MONEYMAKER It was humiliating, wasn’t it, Uno? UNO Si, si. I will get her next time. MONEYMAKER No, Uno, no you won’t. I used to think like you. I’d get beat by Krista, or she’d foil one of my schemes, and I’d say I’ll get her next time. Next time came around and I’d be left once again holding my head in my hands grief stricken in failure. Next time, is the time she rips out another piece of your heart. That’s what happens next time. I have no heart left, she’s taken pieces of it away everytime we renew our unending war. Now there’s nothing left but a furnace that burns with an undying hatred. I used to love Krista in a way, and that love took me to the lowest pits of hell. I’m still there, and if you proceed with what you’re planning on doing, retrying the same old tricks, you’ll join me in misery very shortly. WRIGHT Heed the brilliance of this man’s sagacity. Learn the weary road he has tread. MONEYMAKER When, you’re trapped in hell by someone, the only way out is to put them in that very hell. But conventional methods will not work with Krista. I’ve tried them. A new battle requires new revolutionary weapons that can’t be defended by the enemey. I believe you both have the firearms I need. UNO What are those? MONEYMAKER Voodoo, black magic, the dark arts. You say you’ve mastered witchcraft, I say prove it. I say you join me in placing a curse on Krista, a curse that will bring to her knees deep in the darkest regions of her inner hell. I say we bring the dark night over her, and make it cast glances of venom on her for an eternity. What do you say, gentlemen? Will we have victory and vengeance? Teddy extends his hands, and its eagerly accepted by Uno and Dos as we FADE OUT Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
