SJL Wrath Card, July 2nd

[Guest Suicide King]

SJL Wrath Card, Tuesday July 2nd!

Arena: The Canada Dome, in Canada City, Canada!

Due: Tuesday, July 2 at 3PM Eastern.

 

All stuff goes to Edwin!

 

Single Elimination Tournament for the SJL World Title!!!

 

There’s a void in the SJL… a void we’re gonna fix right now. Every single active JLer has a shot to be the next SJL World Champion… no one has a better shot than anyone else. I have randomly prepared some brackets, so get ready to write kids, cause the prize is on the line! DO NOT NO-SHOW ON PAIN OF DEATH! WRITE ANYTHING, EVEN A SENTENCE.

 

Bracket 1 winner will face the winner of Bracket 2.

3 faces 4, 5 faces 6, 7 faces 8. The winner of 1-2 faces the winner of 3-4; as is the same with 5-6 and 7-8. The winner of 1-4 will face the winner of 5-8 in a stip match of the booker’s choosing, which has yet to be determined, for the SJL Championship!!!

 

Bracket 1 singles match- send to Thoth

Jacob Helmsley v “The Rising Sun” Y2K

-That’s right, the pipe-wielding lunatic is back again, and this time the path to the championship may as well be paved with his name on all of the bricks. But first he has to get past one of the SJL’s newest stars, Y2K!!

-3500 words.

 

Bracket 2 singles match- send to Edwin MacPhisto

Mike Van Siclen v Fugue

-Oh boy oh boy! The Amazing One and that Musical Sociopath Fugue get the opportunity to tear the roof off of the Canada Dome!

-3500 words.

 

Bracket 3 singles match- send to Suicide King

Sydney Sky v Kojack

-Syd looks to get back to her winning ways and the World belt! But first she’s got to get past Kojack…

-4000 words.

 

 

Bracket 4 singles match– send to Longdogger_Pete

Poisyn v CIA

-CIA came so close to the European title he could taste it. Poisyn tastes like.. well, poison. Now they fight!

-4000 words

 

Bracket 5 singles match– send to Edwin MacPhisto

Silent v Cutthroat

-Heh heh heh… this should be amusing.

-4500 words

 

Bracket 6 singles match– send to Thoth

Venom v “Hollywood” Spike Jenkins

-Jenkins won a match! Yay! Can he get past the ruthless Venom though?

-4500 words.

 

Bracket 7 singles match- send to Longdogger Pete

Thor v T-Bone

-The Steak Sauce Covered Bastard is back, and he’s looking to make the mighty Thor taste the Porterhouse of Doom!!!

-5000 words.

 

Main Event- Bracket 8 non-title singles match– send to Suicide King

Renegade v “The Franchise” Mak Francis

- Renegade is clearly still a force to be reckoned with. But Mak Francis is a double champ, holding the TV and Euro title much like his predecessor Stryke! Only one man can advance, but who will it be?

-5500 words

[Guest Chuck Woolery]

On the bright side, I have a shot in this tournament.

 

On the downside, I'm not going to be here for the next four shows.

 

Fuck.

 

Oh well. I can hopefully jump to main event after I return.

 

- Mike Van Siclen.

Away to write! Zing!

[Guest kelloggs]

Sumamabitch...

 

Gades gonna tear me a new one. Fuck...Reny expect a PM cause we may have to talk...

 

Anyways great card King and damnit! Ah well. I'll just have to take my beating like a man

 

M. "Well at least two guys know why I'm bitching" Francis

[Guest -Cutthroat-]

I have no ucking chance...oh well!

[Guest midnight_burn]

Mmm, tournament related goodness.

 

Card looks good, and i'll certainly be follwoing this with great interest to see who will be the next JL Champ.

[Guest Tod deKindes]

My money's on ... ah, hell if I know. Good luck to all

[Guest DiabloIIFreak1010]

This should be cool. Also, I'm wondering, if we could have the finals of the tournoment on a Pay-Per-View.

[Guest BigTim2002]

This will be great...watch and learn peoples...

[Guest HVilleThugg]

Woo at King for not making me mark this show...

 

Cool tourney...

 

Da "watching to make sure no one violates the perimeter of Outcast's lawn" H

[Guest hhh6294]

*~* Jake tramples Outcast's flower beds and makes snide comments to the sleeping guard *~*

[Guest BigTim2002]

Outcast...do your thang man...

[Guest SupaTaft]

Ok, troubling news. My Grandpa died last night. He lived in Florida. My family is leaving to go there tomorrow, including me. So not only will my icy Viking body have to endure the incredible heat, its a damned funeral.

This means that I cannot write a complete match, as we are returning on Thursday. My original plan was to write out the match with a pad and pencil, but that was when I thought we were returning Tuesday. But I am stuck there with no internet access at all. So now my plans are shot.

It says at the top not to no-show under any circumstances, so I am going to write a simple one or two sentence match. I appologize in advance to all involved. I appologize to Longdogger Pete my marker. You will not be able to read a great completed match. I appologize to T-Bone. It would have been fun wrestling a man with a love of meat that rivals my own and hope to wrestle you in the future. I appologize to Edwin MacPhisto, the wonderful commisioner of the SJL. Forgive me Uncle Eddie!!

But most importantly I appologize to the fans. My loyal fans (or so I write them) who cheer me on week after week.

Unless T-Bone no-shows into a jobber legend (please no-show!), I will not be competing for the SJL World Title. So it is with a heavy heart that I leave for Florida, heavy with the knowledge that I will not be able to compete on Wrath. So I now write my very short match.

Thank you, and see you Thursday.

Humbly submitted,

-Taft

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

Accepted and acknowledged, Taft. Hope the trip isn't too bad, and we'll see you when you get back.

[Guest 5_moves_of_doom]

(Y) at grandas.

 

(N) at dead ones.

 

Seriously man, best wishes. I know how it feels.

[Guest kelloggs]

Yeah best wishes Taft

[Guest -Cutthroat-]

Ditto

[Guest Ace309]

Very sorry to hear that, Taft. My heartfelt condolences and I hope you're back in good spirits soon.

 

EDIT: I can't speak for King, but I'm fairly certain that no one would hold a no-show against you under these circumstances.

[Guest Thoth]

Yeah, I think you're off the hook for this one. Don't worry about a thing.

[Guest Longdogger_Pete]

Actually, he's already sent something in to me. It's short, but it's something.

[Guest HVilleThugg]

Now you see...

 

All you no showing bitches in the JL and WF...look at Taft!!

 

His grandfather died, and he got SOMETHING in! So what if it's just a few words...IT'S SOMETHING!!!

 

Everyone take not of his example and follow suit!

 

NO SHOW AND DIE!

 

Oh, and I know how it is man...my best wishes to you and your family. Take your time, and come back when you're good and ready.

 

Now, can someone please tell me...WHY CAN'T I FUCKING BAN ANYONE!?! I WANT TO BAN SOMEONE!!!

 

Da "really wants to abuse his power" H

[Guest Insane Clown Dan]

Heya, peoplez. Yeah, I'm actually alive and still breathing. Obviously, my folks didn't drive the knife of misery in far enough...

 

I've been away for a week at some vacation place (not by choice), and HOT DAMN it seems like I've missed way too much. Uh... wow, my keyboard feels very very foreign right now. All I gotta say now is that good luck to the bumpees, you all deserved what you got, and also...

 

 

 

DA RENEMASTA BEINGZ BACK IN DA J.L. SHIZZOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!! (Y) x092365!!!

 

That'll be all, folks...

 

-ICD needs a mallet to the head. Then the dizziness will fade... fade awaaaaaaay...

[Guest -Cutthroat-]

I jsut had to put my dog down and I'm still writing something...

 

WHY SHADOW!? WHY!? *Cries brefly* (really)

[Guest Insane Clown Dan]

Note to self #68 : Thor is a good samaritan. Yes yes, praise the god of Thunder.

 

Note to self #69 : Steal Cutthroat's morphine and smack him upside the head with a crowbar. 50 times. If skull breaks, continue till a very fine soup of brain cells is made.

 

Seriously... wtf are you talking about CT?

[Guest -Cutthroat-]

I had to put my dog to sleep a few day ago a I'm really upset about it. He was my best buddy.

[Guest Insane Clown Dan]

Oh, that's bad to hear...

 

Don't be afraid to join your best buddy, now... it's comfy in the piled-up soil of maggots and dead stink.

 

*"helps" CT with stepping into the hole, and prepares the shovel* >=)

[Guest Ace309]

Sorry to hear that, Throat. As annoying and fat as my cat is, if I had to put her down I'd be very depressed.

 

That said, Taft still wins.

[Guest Thoth]

You didn't put your dog to sleep. Shut the fuck up. You can't even win sympathy points.

 

Stupid fuck.

[Guest Suicide King]

Yeesh. Little less blind hatred here guys.

 

And good job Taft. I for one really appreciate that you took the time to write a couple of sentences... that shows me and the other members of CC that you really care about the fed and don't want to leave it in the lurch, even with your unfortunate situation.

 

I wish there were more member of the JL like you. Hint, hint.

[Guest BigTim2002]

Hey wait a sec, now...

 

*Thinks back and remembers how he no-showed about four times, and quit without telling anybody...*

 

ah, shit...

[Guest Ash Ketchum]

Damn, D-man... that sucks your grandpa died.

 

Sorry to hear about it, man

 

:*())))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

(The Man W/Infinite Chins Sheds a Tear...)

 

(Inside Joke. You SWF guys wouldn't get it. )

 

~Ash~