Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2009 PRESENTED IN HD FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY -OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT- HERE IS WHAT AN OAOAST ARENA LOOKS LIKE COLE Folks it is time for television's hottest most sizzling show of the summer, HeldDOWN~! Beside me is Johnathan Coachman and we are both ready for another night of scintillating action~! The view switches to Michael Buffer, standing inside the colorful array of spotlights. UFFER The following tag team event is scheduled for one fall. Currently in the ring, two young men from the OAOVW… RAY ANTHONY and STEVIE KEITH! Unlike last week, Anthony and Keith play faces, waving to the crowd, etc. Suddenly gold smoke fills the stage and the lights turn purple as “The Creeps” by Fedde Le Grand blasts through the speakers. BUFFER Their opponents hail from Port Au Prince, Haiti… the minions of the underworld… DIVINE BROTHERS UNO and DOS... LOS CONQUISADOOOOOORRRRRRRSSSSSSS!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Los Conquistadors worship their strange and mysterious gods in the ring when CMJ and SPECNER REIGER, collectively THE LDC MONEYGANG, approach the two OAOVW trainees. COLE What’s going on here? COLE I’d like to know myself. Whatever is said doesn’t go over well, so CMJ delivers an IRISH UPPERCUT and then DROPS RAY ANTHONY ON HIS HEAD! COACH Irish suplex! Not to be outdone, Reiger executes THE REIGER COUNTER on Stevie Keith! COLE That’s uncalled for! COACH Talk about on the job training, Mikey Cole. Those boys just got a lesson in the school of hard knocks. Reiger and CMJ dust themselves off as Los Conquistadors look on confused. The guys point to the fallen OAOVW trainees and Los Conquistadors make the cover. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! * DINGDINGDING * COACH That didn’t take too long. COLE Yeah, thanks to the LDC Moneygang. Los Conquistadors raise their hands in triumph…and then get BLINDSIDED by the Moneygang! COLE/COACH CMJ delivers a pair of CELTIC FROST SUPLEX on both Conquistadors, then assists Spencer in a pair of SPIKE REIGER COUNTERS!! COLE I thought Los Conquistadors were “in” with Theodore Moneymaker? COACH Not anymore obviously. Remember, Teddy vowed to get back at those he believes wronged him. Last week it was Ned Blanchard. I sure hope Team Heyross are watching, Cole. This is what’s in store for them at Angleslam. COLE Whatever the reason, a statement has been made here tonight by the Enterprise. OAOAST officials arrive on the scene as we go to… TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT JEW VS MUSLIM: THE WAR TO SETTLE THE SCORE WORLD TITLE KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN VS SYNTH ABDUL JABBAR COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2009 COLE Folks, welcome back to HeldDOWN~! Earlier this week, I had the opportunity to sit down and talk with the number one contender to the OAOAST World Title, the Battlebowl winner, Leon Rodez. What resulted was a candid interview, from a very changed man. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ EARLIER THIS WEEK On a dark, cold set-up in an OAOAST studio, three chairs sit. One of Michael Cole, not looking particularly comfortable with his assignment. As opposite him sits Leon Rodez in one chair, a dark and cold look on his face to match the surroundings. And in the chair next to him, curled up protectively, is an unnervingly timid looking Morgan Nerdly. COLE Leon, thank you for taking this time to talk to us. Barely responding to the pleasantries, Leon stares back. COLE Firstly I have to ask... what is the relationship that's been developing here lately between yourself and Morgan? Leon looks over at Morgan, who shies away a little. LEON Our relationship is what it is. Yet people seem to feel it needs some kind of explanation. Morgan leans a little closer to Leon, who continues staring right ahead. LEON See I've heard all the whispers and all the accusations, about how this is just another Nerdly to add to my collection. The wits of this company. It's nothing like that. The base emotions that everybody else feels, they don't matter anymore. What this is is very simple. It's like the old saying goes, misery loves company. COLE Some people claim you're doing this to compensate in some way for the people you've alienated. LEON I didn't alienate anyone, Michael. They alienated me. People don't 'understand' why I'm not the same Leon they knew. People don't 'understand' the way Morgan feels inside. And they look at us like there's something wrong, because they're the "normal people", for whom life is bliss. Blissful ignorence. There is no bliss. Our eyes are open to what's going on. And we can't close them, no matter how much we want to. People like us need to stick together. To help each other exist. Because the world is against us. We stick together... then that's one less against to deal with. Lifting her head up, Morgan speaks very quietly and very deliberately. MORGAN Leon helps me understand myself. I've spent my life waiting. for something to make sense. What he says makes sense. LEON See, she sees life for what it truly is. Because she's lived with the same cruel fates that I have. Life has already slapped this girl down, through no fault of her own, time and time and time again. Just like it did me. Her sisters ripped out her heart, just like they did mine. She's been used and manipulated by people she trusted, just like I have. She understands me and I understand her. It's as simple as that. As Leon scowls and slumps back in his chair, Cole attempts to change the subject. COLE Let's talk about what happened last week. It was Krista taking on D*LUX in a Handicap Match, with yourself as the special guest enforcer. You seemed to be tormenting all three during the match. And then afterwards, you sickeningly attacked the World Champion. "GET BACK!" she suddenly shrieks, getting a sudden 'surge' of confidence. "DON'T YOU TAKE ANOTHER STEP!!" The cracking voice tips Krista off that this girl is deadly serious and she stops, not seeing Leon Rodez sliding into the ring behind her! COLE Look out, from behind! Screams echo out of the crowd and Krista senses something is up, so turns around... *SMASH!* ...AND LEON SMASHES HER RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES WITH THE COMPACT MIRROR!!!!!! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE OH, GOD! Krista drops to the mat covering her face as Leon looms over her with a cold expression. LEON There's a double standard in this company. In this business. Any time Krista steps into a wrestling ring, she's fair game. She's been competing for years now. Humiliating, torturing people, people who let her. Robbing people of their dignity. Ruining their lives and enjoying every second of their pain and misery. Yet one bad thing happens to her, and suddenly she becomes a simple woman again. And anyone who hurts her back is an inhuman monster. That just doesn't make any sense to me. It's people like you who feed this. You're enablers for Krista, to do what she does. To make her feel like she can get away with this. So maybe you can explain, Michael. Maybe you can explain all of this. Am I supposed to feel remorse? Am I supposed to feel worried about karma, for the bad things I've done? TELL ME HOW I'M SUPPOSED TO FEEL! Because I don't know anymore. All I know is, I want to see Krista suffer. The way she makes other people suffer. The way she made me suffer. Leon turns over to Morgan. LEON It's people like Krista who made this girl's life hell. Taunting. Teasing. Humiliating. With no care for the emotional scars they're leaving. Sighing, Leon runs a hand through his hair. LEON Krista wrecks people's lives. And for that, she deserves everything she gets. If there were any justice in the world, she'd already have gotten hers long ago. But I know there isn't. That's not going to stop me though, from doing my damndest to rip out her soul and leave her a broken, emotionless ghost inside her own body if I can! To feel the way I feel. To feel the way I felt on June 2nd. At AngleSlam, I'm going to take that OAOAST World Title away from her again. And I don't care what lengths I have to go to, what lines I'm deemed to have stepped over. Krista is going to know what it feels like to die a little inside. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2009 Elsewhere in Josie’s office, the HeldDOWN boss is engaged in an argument with women’s champion Sophie. JOSIE Well, I don’t care what you say. SOPHIE Pourquoi? JOSIE Because you’re biased, and I’m objective. SOPHIE Vous n'êtes pas objectif! JOSIE I won’t argue with you, Sophie. You’re facing a very dangerous opponent, and I need someone to keep you safe. SOPHIE But Lorelei is not that someone! JOSIE I think she is, that’s why I made her guest referee of your title match at Angleslam. She’s very angry at Morgan for leaving her, as twisted as their relationship may be. She won’t let Morgan hurt you in anyway, she wants you to win. For selfish reasons, but they meet my ultimate goal, so I have no reason to question them. SOPHIE I want to do this on my own. JOSIE Not an option. Without Lorelei there, I don’t know what would happen. She can keep you safe. No further debate, Sophie, this is how its going to be. COLE Wow! Lorelei DeCenzo guest referee for the women's title match at Angleslam?! That's explosive that's what that is! LATER TONIGHT BITTER BLOOD COLOMBIAN HEAT VS REJECT TONIGHT! COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2009 n the back lot of the arena, a black Escalade pulls up, and moments after the engine is turned off, ZACK MALIBU climbs out of the driver's seat. The fans, who are watching this on the AngleTron in the arena, boo loudly as Malibu shuts the door, and turns around right into BOHEMOTH. BO Hey. MALIBU What do you want, Bo? BO Is that how it is now? You go off on one of your tantrums and forget about your friends? You want to throw the past in my face, is that it? MALIBU I'm not throwing anything in your face. You've been trying to make your name off of me for years now. First with the Civil War and Upstarts crap, then with our competition, and then with The In Crowd. BO YOU asked me to be in The In Crowd. Malibu fumes, hating to be corrected. BO Look, if you've got beef with Cortez for the whole Wildcards deal, that's your thing. Personally, I think that your "good buddy" Anglesault over there is exploiting you, not anybody else. MALIBU How do you figure? BO How do I figure? The guy has been trying to control you and tell you what to do for months now. He badgered you and badgered you until you snapped, and now you're digging up three year old dirt and throwing it in Cortez's face. This ain't you, man. MALIBU No, this IS me, Bo. The sooner you realize it, the better. I'm tired of having everyone throw their weight on my shoulders. I'm tired of having to worry about everyone in this company like I'm a damn kindergarten teacher. I... WHOMP~! In the midst of Zack's rebuttal, he's tackled against the side of his car by TODD CORTEZ ,who has raced outside to attack his old friend! Bo instantly steps in, trying to seperate the two men, but as he tries to break Cortez off of Zack, Zack gets up and hits a low kick, then sends Todd face first into the side of the truck! Zack goes to nail a few shots with Todd down, but Bo grabs him by the wrist, stopping the shot! BO STOP. Zack hesitates, then angrily takes his hand away from Bo, peering at his old stablemate. MALIBU From this point on, stay out of my life. Malibu walks into the arena, while Bo drops down to check on Cortez, as we fade out. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2009 “The Wall” by Kansas hits, and The Deadly Alliance makes their way to the ring. The crowd boos loudly. Despite what happened last week, all the members of The DA are in high spirits, showcasing their belts, taunting the fans and generally being asses. COLE It wouldn’t be a HeldDOWN~! without an appearance from The Deadly Alliance! And considering what was said last week, I’m surprised at how happy The Deadly Alliance appears to be. COACH Why WOULDN’T they be happy? They’ve got gold, they’ve got women, they’ve got success! AND they’ve gotten rid of Alfdogg at long last! COLE But you heard what Colombian Heat said last week! Tha Puerto Rican is returning to the OAOAST, and he’s targeting Reject! COACH So what? He’ll fight him and he’ll choke like he always has. COLE You have no idea when he’ll return, Coach! He could be returning tonight and be backstage hearing what you just said on a monitor! COACH … COLE Colombian Heat will have a chance at revenge when he takes on Reject later on tonight in singles action! COACH Hide me. COLE No. Reject grabs the microphone. The Deadly Alliance all stand in the middle of the ring and sneer at the fans. “The Wall” by Kansas dies down. “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” REJECT Despite the bombshell dropped last week, The Deadly Alliance is no worse for the wear. The idle threats of a few has-beens and never weres are not enough to deter the momentum that The Deadly Alliance currently has! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COACH Amen to that! REJECT It is this momentum that will take myself and The Deadly Alliance to the absolute TOP of the OAOAST food chain. We have several titles, but trust me, TRUST ME, when I say that there is more to come! The crowd boos. REJECT So if Tha Puerto Rican ever does decide to show his face in the OAOAST again, we will be ready. If that short, overrated, annoying, unbearable wannabe wants to pick a fight with The Deadly Alliance, then, to borrow a catchphrase that Tha Puerto Rican has stolen for himself since he has no shame, then Tha Puerto Rican can JUST BRING IT! COACH PWNED~! COLE Not even close. REJECT If Tha Puerto Rican decides to stick his nose in The Deadly Alliance’s business, then I will do what the FORMER *RETIRED* leader of The Deadly Alliance COULDN’T do: I will beat him. 1-2-3! Or make him tap out before I break every bone in his body with The R-Lock! COACH Alfdogg could never beat Tha Puerto Rican! COLE Actually, he did a few times-- COACH Alfdogg could never beat Tha Puerto Rican! COLE You just said tha-- COACH Alfdogg could never beat Tha Puerto Rican! REJECT And I hope Tha Puerto Rican is watching HeldDOWN~! this week, because later on in this program, tonight, in…this…very…ring, I’m going to show him what he’s in for when I take on his best friend, his main man, his ‘homie’, Colombian Heat, one-on-one! The crowd cheers for the mention of Colombian Heat! REJECT And after I bash his head in and further scar his back, maybe Tha Puerto Rican will think twice about returning to the OAOAST and going one-on-one with The R-Man! The crowd boos for Reject insulting Colombian Heat and PRL. REJECT Colombian Heat, and if he has the balls, Tha Puerto Rican, will learn, just like Alfdogg learned, that crossing the R…won’t get you far! COACH Put that on a T-shirt! It’ll outsell Tha Puerto Rican’s crap 20,000-to-1! REJECT Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are just road blocks in our way. And after we get done with them, we can move on to other, more important matters. Like the Money In The Bank contract that I-- The AngleTron lights up with an image of a man reading the August 2009 issue of OAOAST Magazine with Reject on the cover. The headline reads “THE R-MAN COMETH: REJECT SPEAKS ON HIS PAST, HIS PRESENT AND HIS FUTURE!” The crowd is curious as to who is reading the magazine on sale now at newsstands everywhere! A FAMILIAR (HIGH-PITCHED) VOICE (Reading OAOAST Magazine) ‘I did the OAOAST a lot of good by getting rid of Tha Puerto Rican at School’s Out.’ Reject says, ’Tha Puerto Rican was old news. Losing the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title to a whiny emo like Leon Rodez just shows how much of a joke he truly is. He should have stayed down when Mr. Dick injured his bicep, but the son of a bitch is stubborn, and he paid for his stubbornness at School’s Out. We are a lot better off without Tha Puerto Rican! He was, is and will forever be a 2nd-rate, no talent jackass!’ 2nd Rate? No talent? JACKASS!? The man angrily puts down the magazine…revealing the face of the one, the only, THA PUERTO RICAN!!!!!!! “YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” COLE Hey! It’s him! COACH AAAH! Coach hides underneath the announce table! THA PUERTO RICAN No, you’re not seeing a ghost! This is not a repeat! This is LIVE! This is now! And this IS the moment that you’ve all been waiting for! Because…At long last…after all of this time…THE CHAMP…IS…HERE! The crowd EXPLODES with cheers. COLE Tha Puerto Rican has returned to the OAOAST after a four month absence and the fans couldn’t be happier! Tha Puerto Rican has let his hair grow out and he is now sporting a beard. However, he still has his trademark sunglasses, earring on his right ear and gold chain around his neck, and is wearing a long sleeve purple dress shirt. He is also sporting his $500 Rolex watch on his right wrist. Tha Puerto Rican stares at the camera with a serious look on his face, standing in front of a bookcase that holds several of the championship belts, trophies and plaques that he has won over his career. To the left of the bookcase hangs a picture of PRL and his girlfriend, Maggie Nerdly, arms around each other’s shoulders, at a beach in San Juan, Puerto Rico as the sun sets. “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” “P.R.!” Reject eyes the AngleTron with a cold look in his eyes. The Deadly Alliance all make their angry faces. THA PUERTO RICAN Now, I don’t mean to bust your bubble…well…actually, I lie, I DO mean to bust your bubble! But, anyway, Tha Puerto Rican has *just* about had it with your bragging, young man! I mean, it’s one thing to brag about retiring Alfdogg. You actually DID do that. The crowd boos. Reject smiles. THA PUERTO RICAN But to brag that you retired Tha Puerto Rican? That you got rid of Tha Puerto Rican! That you made sure that Tha Puerto Rican never steps foot into a One And Only AngleSault Thread ring ever again? Well, Reject, Tha Puerto Rican just will NOT stand for that! Uh-Uh! No way! No how! Reject is starting to get pissed now. THA PUERTO RICAN Now Tha Puerto Rican says that yes, The Thunderous Rejection through the glass table did a number on him. And yes, Tha Puerto Rican had to get 23 stitches in his head after that. The crowd boos. Reject and Thunderkid nod and smile evilly. PRL (CON’TD) BUT…even so…even with all of that…it STILL wasn’t enough to make Tha Puerto Rican retire! Didn’t you get the memo? There ain’t NO MAN…no living breathing human being PERIOD…that can make Tha Puerto Rican retire! Learn to love it, Reject, because Tha Puerto Rican is going to be here for a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG TIME COMING! Tha Puerto Rican ain’t going NOWHERE! And that’s the truth, Ruth! Reject is fuming now. But the crowd is going crazy. THA PUERTO RICAN Ask your friend, Mr. Shriveled Up Monkey Penis--I mean, Mr. Dick, how hard it is to get rid of Tha Puerto Rican! He tried. He failed. Stephen Joseph Popick tried. He failed. Brickston tried. He failed. Cuban Wall tried. He failed. That sorry sumbitch Landon “La Cucaracha” Maddix tried. And he failed too! Not surprisingly! But still! Is it getting through your thick skull yet!? Do I have to paint you a pretty picture!? Because I’m quite the painter, too, if I do say so myself! I make art inside AND outside of the ring! But Tha Puerto Rican is getting too far off-topic. The point, Reject, and there is one, is that bragging that you retired Tha Puerto Rican was just dumb! A stupid mistake! It’s as stupid as getting your head stuck in a honey pot. As stupid as having an underground dog fighting ring when you’re a famous NFL superstar. As stupid as sleeping with a girl who has 45 different sexually transmitted diseases. Melissa, you know what I’m talking about! “OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” This sets Reject off. Melissa is outraged! COACH Hey! COLE Haha Haha! REJECT Listen here, you piece of crap! Nobody, but NOBODY, talks to my girlfriend that way! You are totally wrong about her! She’s a princess! She’s an angel. She’s the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me! She means the world to me! I think that she is the most beautiful girl in the world! I think that she is the sexiest woman alive. I think that she-- THA PUERTO RICAN IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT MELISSA NERDLY! “YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” COLE PWNED~! THA PUERTO RICAN Everybody knows that Tha Puerto Rican has got the best Nerdly sister anyway! Reject, you think that you impress Tha Puerto Rican by giving him a Thunderous Rejection through a glass table? You think that Tha Puerto Rican is shivering in his boots worried for Colombian Heat later on tonight? You think that should we meet, you will beat me single-handedly? Well, wake up, you son of a bitch! Because you’re obviously dreaming! You say that Tha Puerto Rican is finished? I don’t think so! Tha Puerto Rican is BACK, BAY-BEE~! I’M BACK IN THE OAOAST! I AM BACK IN THE OAOAST! The crowd cheers. THA PUERTO RICAN (CONT’D) My wounds have healed. My body has recovered. I am fully rested. I had plenty of R&R with my girl, Maggie, by my side! I am at 100%! And I am ready. Tha Puerto Rican is READY to make his return to the One And Only AngleSault Thread! And I am coming for you, Reject! Yes, you. I didn’t stutter. Right now, in front of the millions… “…AND MILLIONS!” THA PUERTO RICAN …AAAAAAAND MILLIONS of Tha Puerto Rican’s fans, I am challenging you to a match. I am challenging you to go ONE-ON-ONE… “…WITH THE GREAT ONE!” THA PUERTO RICAN And I want to have that match…at ANGLESLAM! COLE All right! Tha Puerto Rican has thrown down the gauntlet! THA PUERTO RICAN Monday Night, August the 31st. AngleSlam 2009. In my hometown of San Juan, Puerto Rico! In front of the sold out crowd at Coliseo de Puerto Rico José Miguel Agrelot. In front of MY people! In front of the whole world! You, Reject, will receive the ass whopping your momma should have gave ya! When we step into the ring on the 31st, you will bare witness to how a REAL beatdown goes down, as I layeth the smacketh down on your candy ass all over San Juan! In my mind, that is the perfect way to say, ‘I’MMMMMMM BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!’ COLE He is most certainly back! THA PUERTO RICAN That is if you even WANT this match! I mean, you might be too scared for all I know. REJECT I ain’t scared of NOBODY! ESPECIALLY YOU! YOU’VE GOT YOURSELF A MATCH! The crowd cheers! COLE And there you have it! The match is made! Tha Puerto Rican vs. Reject in San Juan, Puerto Rico at AngleSlam on August 31st! Tha Puerto Rican smiles. REJECT I wouldn’t be so quick to smile, P.R. You see, I don’t give a damn about the fact that you will be making your return in your hometown. I won’t take it easy on you. I won’t go soft. In fact, knowing that we will be in your hometown, your birthplace, that just makes me wanna fight harder! I am going to embarrass you in front of your friends. In front of your family. In front of YOUR people. I am going to make sure that you become the laughingstock of Puerto Rico! I am going to hurt you. I am going to injure you…again. I am going to destroy you on the island that you were born in and raised in. I am going to make sure that this is a homecoming that you will never…EVER…forget. AngleSlam will be a memorable, important, historic night. Not for you. But for ME! I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into. THA PUERTO RICAN And I hope *you* know what you’re getting yourself into! Or should that be, *who* you’re getting yourself into! Has Melissa gotten tested? Who knows what she has gotten in just the past, oh, 2 days!? The crowd laughs. Reject sneers. REJECT (sarcastically) Ha. Ha. Ha. Real funny. THA PUERTO RICAN Why thank you! REJECT You know, the more you crack wise, the more you make me excited for AngleSlam. Because I absolutely cannot wait to jam my foot down your throat! THA PUERTO RICAN You won’t have the chance to do that, because in a blink of an eye, before you know what hits you, WHAM! You’re going to get hit with the Latin Slam! WHAM! The People’s Elbow Drop! WHAM! The Lightning Strike! WHAM! The P.R. Nightmare! OR…WHAM! The Most Electrifying Move In Professional Wrestling: The Puerto Rico Elbow! All it takes is one second. So Reject, watch out! The storm clouds are hovering over San Juan! And on August 31st, the lightning will strike! And you, my friend, will suffer a P.R. Nightmare! But first, let my friend Colombian Heat rough you up a bit. You know, for kicks! HAHAHAHAHA! I'll see you in two weeks, Lightning Bolts! Tha Puerto Rican tilts his head back. THA PUERTO RICAN THE CHAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMP…HAS…SPO-KUN~!!! Tha Puerto Rican does The People’s Eyebrow. The crowd cheers loudly. “Know Your Role 2000” starts playing over the P.A. system. Tha Puerto Rican smiles to the camera. Reject fumes and talks with The Deadly Alliance, who are also pissed off. COLE What an announcement! We now know the date of Tha Puerto Rican‘s return! It is Monday August 31st, LIVE at AngleSlam from Tha Puerto Rican’s hometown of San Juan! COACH Is he gone? COLE He was never in the building, Coach! COACH So? His spirit was here! That’s enough for me! COLE What? Oh come on! Reject vows VENGEANCE on Tha Puerto Rican in the ring as “Know Your Role 2000” continues playing. COLE In 11 days, that man right there, Reject, will take on Tha Puerto Rican in PRL’s return match! This could be a career defining moment for Reject, taking on a former OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion in his hometown at the biggest event of the summer! But Reject will also be in the squared circle later on tonight when he battles Colombian Heat, Tha Puerto Rican’s best friend! That’s still to come! Don’t go away, fans! More OAOAST HeldDOWN~! right after these messages! FADE OUT COMMERCIALS Coming back from commercial, we find Lucius Soul waiting in the ring, busy combing his 'fro and checking it out at various angles on the big screen. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall. In the ring, from New Orleans, Louisiana... weighing ... "THE BLACK KNIGHT", "SWEET" LLLUUUUUUCCCIIIIIIUUUUSSSSSSS... SSSSSOOOUUUUUUULLLLLLLL!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Singles action here on HeldDOWN and we're being joined by a special guest, the Queen gracing us with her presence! QUEEN EMILY Salutations! Who may I say is speaking? COLE It's... it's me. I'm sitting right next to you. QUEEN EMILY OH! I see! I'm not familiar with these auto-communication helmets you are using. As the Queen gets to grips with the futuristic headset she's been fitted with, "Witness (1 Hope)" by Roots Manuva hits. Jogging out from the back J-MAX fires up the crowd before heading to the ring. BUFFER And his opponent. From Birmingham, England... weighing one hundred and eighty one pounds... "THE BIRMINGHAM BAD BOY"... J - MMMMMMAAAAAAAAAXXXXXXXX!!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Queen Esther, I've got to ask how you're doing after last week. QUEEN EMILY (unconvincing) I'm fine. I do not remember anything bad happening to me last week. COLE Wha...wait a minute. What about Melody pulling you off of the apron and you landing on the floor? QUEEN EMILY Sweet man, I think, perhaps, you must have dreamt that. COLE Well we've got the video right here if you're having some memory problems. Queen Esther feels the same thing, appealing for a kind knight to come to her man's rescue. Unfortunately, Rico and Lucius are busy on the floor with MARV and MEL, while Baron is slugging away at Danny Boy. So, left with no other option, Queen Esther climbs onto the apron (which with her ballgown is no easy feat). The referee orders the Queen to get off the apron, but gets a helping hand from Melody Nerdly, who pulls her to the floor!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" The Queen lands with a thud on her derrierre and although her ballgown gives her plenty of padding, she's AGHAST at being womanhandled. QUEEN EMILY Wherever did you obtain that footage young man? That is the demon footage! I specifically asked that all copies of that tape be destroyed! And now you have replayed it, so the world will once again be subjected to nasty images of their Queen being attacked by a bad person! Oh no no, you have corrupted the sweet innocent minds of your viewers! COLE Well, we try our best, every Thursday night. *DINGDINGDING!* With both men ready to go the bell sounds and they circle, Lucius still combing his 'fro. They go to lock up, which is when Lucius realises he's got a 'fro pick in his hand, so he asks for a timeout to put it safely in his pocket. COACH There's a dawg with priorities. Once he's ready Lucius walks back over, to accusations of time-wasting from the masked J-MAX. Lucius jaws back and goes to shut him up with a PIMPSLAP... but J-MAX ducks and starts firing right hands! Backing him up against the ropes, J-MAX whips Lucius to the ropes and connects with a spin wheel kick. First cover of the match... 1... 2... No! Soul backs into a corner, looking for another timeout to fix his 'fro. But he doesn't get one. J-MAX rushes and delivers a running forearm in the corner, then looks for another whip. A reversal sends J-MAX towards the corner, which is no problem, running up the ropes and then moonsaulting up and over the on-rushing Black Knight! QUEEN EMILY Heavens above! Lucius lets out a confused "da'hell!?" and turns around, right into a hurricanrana! COLE J-MAX, on fire! Once he gets going, he's so hard to stop. COACH Unless you start calling him mean names or something. That usually gets rid of him for a couple of months. Scrambling out of the ring, Lucius tries to clear his head. J-MAX lines him up and gets the crowd clapping, preparing to take flight. As he runs across the ring though, Lucius looks up and spotting J-MAX coming, he quickly slides in under the bottom rope. J-MAX just manages to save himself, vaulting over the top rope and landing on the apron. Thinking he's safe, Lucius does a fancy two-step. But when he turns around, he's taken out with a Springboard Crossbody!! 1... 2... NO! Still in full flow J-MAX comes off the ropes but gets caught with a Powerslam! COACH That sure stopped him. 1... 2... No! Swinging J-MAX around, Lucius sends him back into the ropes and lays him out with a back elbow. And with this brief pause in the action, Lucius decides to use his precious time to comb his 'fro. Of course. QUEEN ESTHER Oh, I do admire a gentleman who takes care of his appearance. Not like some of these brutes I encounter in the locker room. Tucking away his comb, Lucius covers J-MAX... 1... 2... No. Soul clubs at the back of J-MAX as he gets back up, before forcing him back into a corner. Jabs rock the masked man until the referee's count of four, at which points Lucius backs up to show "I'm cool". Lucius then dishes out a couple of kicks to the chest, before setting up an irish whip. As he approaches the corner, J-MAX gets a foot up, stopping himself with the middle turnbuckle and throwing his elbow back to catch Lucius. J-MAX then springs to the middle and leaps over Lucius, spinning in mid-air to execute a flying sunset flip... 1... 2... No! Rolling right back to his feet, Lucius is up before J-MAX can move and KICKS the seated masked man clean in the face! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE What a shot that was, right to the masked SKULL~! Cover by Lucius... 1... 2... Kickout! Lucius drags J-MAX back up and shoves him into the corner. After a few more jabs he loads J-MAX up, whipping him across the ring. J-MAX hits the other corner and Lucius is right behind him, spinning through the air looking for the Soul Brother Splash... but J-MAX sneaks out of the way! J-MAX runs right for the ropes again. But Lucius regains his breath and delivers a BICYCLE KICK, so hard that J-MAX BACKFLIPS AND FACEPLANTS INTO THE MAT!!!!! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" COLE OH MY! WHAT A KICK! QUEEN ESTHER Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray! Flipping the limp body of his opponent over, Lucius senses victory and hooks the leg eagerly... 1... 2... KICKOUT!! COLE No, J-MAX kicks out, after two hard kicks to the head in quick succession! How about that! COACH He might have kicked out, but he's clearly on dreamstreet, that's obvious mask or no mask. Lucius debates the count with the referee and threatens him with a Pimpslap, but wisely controls his anger. "J - MAX!" "J - MAX!" "J - MAX!" "J - MAX!" QUEEN ESTHER The people are singing! How delightful! COLE Yes, but they're singing for your man's opponent. QUEEN ESTHER My heart holds no bad feelings when people come together in song Michael. Dragging J-MAX back up, Lucius takes him up onto the shoulder, looking for the Fro 2 Sleep. J-MAX still has enough wits about him to struggle free though, squirming out of Soul's grip and landing on his feet. Lucius tries to nail J-MAX with a clothesline, which is ducked, leaving him open for a desperation enziguri! COLE And this time it's Lucius who takes the kick to the head. Both men take a few seconds to shake out the cobwebs. Lucius recovers first and grabs hold of J-MAX, by the mask. But J-MAX knocks the hands away, catching Lucius in the jaw with a jumping knee strike! Spit flies, Soul left dazed. J-MAX quickly hooks him up and delivers a standing blockbuster neckbreaker, then rolls on top... 1... 2... No! J-MAX asks for encouragement from the crowd as he gets back up. COACH What's up with these fools, cheering for a quitter, somebody who can't even show his face? QUEEN ESTHER Could he perhaps be a masked highwayman? I must hope not, I ride my stagecoach everywhere! COACH Say what? As Soul gets back up J-MAX runs at him, leaping up with a hurricanrana... but Lucius catches him and SITS DOWN!! COLE Sitout Powerbomb!! 1... 2... KICKOUT!! COLE What a great counter move from Lucius, but still not enough! Lucius quickly picks J-MAX back up and lifts him onto the shoulders. He carries him into the middle of the ring and throws him up, ready to put him 2 sleep... but J-MAX, remarkably, manages to twist around in mid-air and COUNTER WITH THE HURRICANRANA!!! COLE WOW! Rolled to his feet, Lucius walks right into a spinning wheel kick, laying him out near the corner. COLE And this might be J-MAX's cue to fly! QUEEN ESTHER Oh dear. This isn't good at all. J-MAX climbs the turnbuckles, bringing the crowd to their feet. QUEEN ESTHER Hello? Hello? Come in mister director! Please turn all of your cameras off before it's too late! Do you read me? Hello? But before Queen Esther's transmission can be dealt with, J-MAX takes flight and CRUSHES LUCIUS WITH THE 630 SPLASH!!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE That's one move that doesn't deserve to be burnt from the records!! 1... 2... 3!!!!! *DINGDINGDING!* COLE And after a hard-fought battle, J-MAX picks up the win! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match... J - MMMMMMAAAAAAXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" The masked high flier has his hand raised in victory, the crowd still jumping after the move they just witnessed. J-MAX climbs to the middle rope and plays to the fans as Queen Esther leaves the booth to attend to her fallen Knight. Not that she's much help, begging the referee to "do something" as Lucius simply moans in pain. COLE J-MAX, flying high in the OAOAST! Folks, we'll have more HeldDOWN in a minute. Stick around! COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2009 Returning from commercial break finds us with Maggie Nerdly all set to interview Krista Isadora Duncan. MAGGIE What’s up, ya’ll, Maggie Nerdly chillin backstage with the world champ, Krista Isadora Duncan! So, Mrs.Duncan you heard Leon’s comments in his interview earlier tonight, got anything you wanna say back? KRISTA Leon Rodez I’m tired, tired, tired of this man. I wish I could join the Bloods or Crips, I’d have me and the homies doing drive byes all across Grand Rapids. I’d chase him down an alley and put two in his back like Ricky from Boyz N Da Hood. Leon Rodez could cure AIDS, give birth to golden puppies, and pee giant rainbows and I’d still have the urge to run him down with a 4 wheeler. I almost regret even dignifying his utterly insane comments with an interview. Do I try to rebut the homeless man in front of the Beverly Center who informs me I am the demonic Jewish she devil that will destroy the Christian world. No, I say “Shut up Terry, and get back to cleaning my toilets with a toothbrush. It adds extra sparkle and minty flavor for those who like to drink out the toilet…i.e. Christian Wright. I should be saving my breath and my words for someone that isn’t some walking combination of flesh and sheer idiocy. But, instead I’m forced to go back and forth with a babbling idiot. Now I know what its like to go on the Jimmy Kimmel show. MAGGIE And now you know what its like to talk to Melody. KRISTA Theodore Moneymaker, Lucius Soul, Frank Bruiser, Kevin Costner, these are evil detestable subhuman lifeforms. These people are so bad they could sit in a bar in hell and get the “you ain’t gotta go home but you can’t stay here” treatment from the bouncer. If I’ve ruined their life, if I sabotaged their careers I did it because they deserve it more than anyone. Although if you work full time in the OAOAST I’m not sure how much lower your existence can sink. Listen to me, people need protection from people like Leon Rodez, evil, manipulative, lying scum of the worst places on earth. They need to be protected, I heard they got 100 Ways to choke out Leon Rodez classes at the YMCA, its that desperate. Its like a mildew on shower tile, you don't wait until its so bad that Alix halluciantes that she's the stay puft marshmallow man, you whip that maid with your trusty black belt and you tell her get to cleaning! That's what I'm doing, I'm cleaning up the disgusting mildew of life. But apparently I’m not so good at ruining lives and destroying careers, and wrecking futures, blah blah blah. Because I were any good at it, Leon Rodez would not be king of his magical fantasy land where he didn’t stage an unprovoked attack on his best friend, and didn’t drive his niece to join The Enterprise. MAGGIE And didn’t sleep with my 3 of my sisters behind my back! KRISTA Leon, if you’re challenging me to ruin your life it’s a challenge I accept. Its better than being on “Shaq Vs”. Why the hell am I going to do Jazzercise with the 7 foot guy from Shazam, best know for being Kobe’s out of shape and lazy sidekick? But, I digress. Leon Rodez, come Angleslam, I don’t know if I’m going to humiliate you, ruin you, or destroy you, but I will bitch slap you all the way to North Korea, and tell Kim Jong Il he risks nuclear attack if he sends you back. As for Synth Abdul Jabbar, my opponent tonight, you consider yourself a rockstar of some sort? Its good to dream, honey, very good. Krista has a dream also. I dream that I rip your drumsticks out your hand, jab them in your eyes, and proceed to play “Maybe its Amazing” by Paul McCartney on your ruptured orbital bone, while all the children of the world hold hands and sing in sweet glorious song. But we both have to wake up to reality, you’re not a rockstar, I’m not a drummer, Terry Taylor is 50 and a virgin, and the biggest match of your life is going to turn into the biggest embarrassment in your life. Just the way Leon likes it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2009 REJECT/HEAT entrances etc. *DING DING DING* Reject and Heat tie up, and Reject grabs a side headlock. Heat backs Reject into the ropes, then shoves him across. Reject takes down Heat with a shouldercheck, then runs to the ropes once again. Heat flips over, then gets to his feet, and catches Reject with a hiptoss! He follows up with a dropkick, sending Reject bailing to the floor. COLE Two nice moves by Heat, and Reject needs to regroup! Reject walks to another side of the ring, then re-enters and ties up. Heat grabs a side headlock, but Reject backs him into the ropes and shoves him across, and goes for a clothesline, but Heat ducks and catches him with a crucifix! 1... 2... Kickout! Reject goes after Heat, who catches him with a drop toehold, then grabs him in a side headlock. Reject backs him into the ropes once again, this time kneeing him in the gut, then whipping him across. Heat ducks a clothesline, and comes back with a flying bodypress! 1... 2... Kickout! Reject rolls Heat to the outside on the kickout, but Heat quickly comes back up, and delivers a shoulder to the midsection. Heat then comes in with a sunset flip! 1... 2... Kickout! Heat catches Reject with a headlock takedown. COLE Heat going for quick covers here in the early going! Reject gets to his feet, and backs Heat into a corner, then backs off, before laying in a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! COACH There we go! Reject delivers another CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Reject brings Heat out, and sets him up for a back suplex, but Heat lands on his feet behind him, then spins him around and hits him with a jab! COLE Shake, Rattle and Roll time! Heat follows with a second jab, then a third, then does a little dance before flooring Reject with a big right hand! COLE It's been all Heat early on in this one! Reject retreats to a corner, and Heat follows, hammering him with more right hands. He finishes with a spinkick, which brings Reject staggering out of the corner, then backs into the ropes, coming back to send Reject's face into the mat with both hands! Reject rolls to the outside once again. COACH Man, Reject just can not get it going here! Heat follows this time, grabbing Reject, and ramming his face into the steel steps! Heat then rolls back in and climbs to the top rope. COLE Heat going for it all here! Heat leaps towards Reject, who moves, and Heat crashes into the guardrail! COACH COLE Well, a big risk taken there by Heat, and it did not pay off! Reject stops to catch his wind, then picks up Heat, and delivers a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Reject then scoops up Heat, and drops him across the guardrail, then dumps him into the front row before re-entering the ring to pose, drawing boos. COLE And Reject has turned the tide in this one, thanks to a miscue off the top by Heat! Heat crawls over the railing and back into the ring, where Reject meets him and delivers some stomps. He then whips him into the ropes, but puts his head down, and Heat catches him with a sunset flip! 1... 2... Kickout! Reject delivers a quick shot to the throat, and is admonished by the referee. He then picks up Heat, and executes a fisherman's buster! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Reject whips Heat into the ropes, and catches him with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Reject tries another Irish whip, but Heat reverses. He puts his head down, though, and Reject delivers a kick, the follows up with a dropkick, sending Heat rolling to the outside! Reject poses, drawing boos. COACH I think Reject's starting to sense victory! Reject follows Heat outside, and hammers him with right hands. He then rolls him back inside, then climbs to the top rope, and hits him with a double axhandle! Cover... 1... 2... Shoulder up! COLE Heat JUST getting that shoulder up! Reject slowly gets to his feet, then puts his hands on his knees, and waits on Heat. COACH Here it comes, Cole! COLE Reject waiting to pounce with the Eulogy! Heat gets to his feet, as Reject approaches...but Heat was playing possum, and scores with a PELE KICK~! COLE But no! Heat with the Pele Kick! Both men are down, and the referee counts... 1!!! 2!!! 3!!! 4!!! 5!!! 6!!! 7!!! Both men slowly get to their feet, and Heat blocks a right hand, then fires off a series of rights of his own! He then executes an inverted atomic drop, followed by a clothesline! COLE Heat starting a comeback here! He follows that with a swinging neckbreaker! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Heat executes a Russian legsweep, then climbs to the top rope, and hits Reject with a missile dropkick, followed by a SPINAROONI~! COLE Heat's really cooking now! Heat spins to his feet, then immediately goes into a WESTSIIIIIIIIIIIDE MOONSAULT~! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Reject gets the shoulder up! COLE Here comes the Deadly Alliance! Thunderkid runs around to the side of the ring, and rolls inside, but Heat catches him with right hands! Mr. Dick hops onto the apron, but the referee cuts him off as Heat dropkicks TK out of the ring! Meanwhile, Reject pulls a pair of brass knuckles from his tights! COLE Reject's got something in his hand! Heat makes his way back to Reject, who pops up and drills Heat with the knucks, then drops them on the outside next to TK, who puts them in his pocket. Reject covers, as MD hops off the apron, and the referee comes around... 1... 2... 3!!! *DING DING DING* COLE And Reject has stolen one from Colombian Heat! BUFFER The winner of the match...RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEJEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECT!!!!! The referee raises Reject's hand, as MD slides into the ring and stomps away on Heat. COLE And Mr. Dick getting in some cheap shots! Reject soon joins in on the assault, as does TK, who holds Heat along with MD so Reject can lay his shots in. Suddenly, cheers are heard from the crowd, as Denzel Spencer makes his way down the aisle! COLE Denzel on his way down! Denzel shoots to the top rope, and catches Reject with a flying bodypress! He then hammers away on TK, while Heat gets loose and hammers on MD, until Sandman9000 hits the ring and floors Denzel with a kendo stick! COACH Sandman to the rescue! COLE Sandman hammering away on the man who will challenge him for the Heartland title at AngleSlam in just ten days! Sandman starts to choke out Denzel with the kendo stick, as Reject pulls a glass table out from under the ring. COLE Oh no. COACH There it is! The career-killing glass table! As Reject slides the table into the ring, another cheer comes from the crowd, as THE TEAL TIGER slides into the ring! COLE Wait a minute! It's the masked man, the Teal Tiger! COACH We all know who's under that mask, and he's got no business here! His career is over! Tiger takes the stick from Sandman, and blasts him across the back! He then floors MD with a SUPERKICK, then catches TK with a BELLY-TO-BELLY~! Tiger then holds the stick as Reject begs off of him, as Arturas steps in over the top rope! COLE And here comes the big man! Arturas delivers a Mongolian chop from behind, then lifts him in a two-handed choke hold! COACH Look at the big guy dominate! Get the mask, Arturas! However, Denzel and Heat both slide in and deliver chair shots to the back, which don't drop the big man, but causes him to let go of Tiger. Arturas quickly recovers, though, and is ready to take on all three men, before Reject calls him off. COACH Two chairshots, and it barely fazes the big guy! I can only think what would have happened had Reject not called him off! Gasolina remix plays, as Heat, Denzel, and Tiger raise hands in the middle of the ring. COLE A lot of scores to settle here, including one big match for the Heartland title! Sandman/Denzel, at AngleSlam! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2009 In the arena, the cameras catch up with Zack Malibu, who is sitting inside ANGLESAULT's office. ANGLESAULT That stupid son of a bitch. He jumped you right in the parking lot? MALIBU That's what he did. Guess he thought he could... Suddenly, the door swings open, and in comes Bohemoth! ANGLESAULT I don't remember an appointment with you, Bo. BOHEMOTH We didn't have one. ANGLESAULT I didn't hear you knock either. BOHEMOTH Then you're hearing is good, because I didn't. ANGLESAULT Look, I don't have time for your sh... Bo lunges over the desk, pulling Anglesault up by the collar of his shirt. BOHEMOTH You listen to ME! Zack gets up, but Anglesault urges him to sit down. Zack doesn't sit, as he remains on his feet, ready to strike. BOHEMOTH I don't like you. I have no respect for you. You're making me proud of some of the things I did when I was an Upstart, because you running this company is making us worse off than if Drek Stone DID get his way. You've been corrupted by your own power, and now you're corrupting the one guy who knows you best, just so he won't see through it. ANGLESAULT Is that what you think I'm doing? You think I'm playing puppet master here? BOHEMOTH I don't think it, I know it. ANGLESAULT Let me tell YOU something then. Anglesault slowly pries Bo's hands away from his neck, and fixes his shirt. ANGLESAULT This is MY company. I sat back and let everyone work on their own free will. Ask no questions, tell no lies. I came back three years ago because one of my FRIENDS needed me, and that was the wake-up call. That maybe I should stick around to make sure things are on the up and up. Now since then I've been attacked, forced out, bloodied, beaten, and SHOT, so pardon me for being a bit more jaded than the rest of you on the roster. I'm not brainwashing anyone, Bo. I'm just making sure that Zack doesn't become a pushover like I did, because he doesn't deserve that after all he's done for me, for YOU, and for this company. A true friend of his would have realized it, but instead his only friends are the people like you looking to increase their market value by lingering by his side. BOHEMOTH So that's how it is? ANGLESAULT That's how it is. Bo chuckles and looks down, then perks up and goes to nail Anglesault with a punch, but Zack hooks his arm. MALIBU Get out of here. NOW. BOHEMOTH You want it this way, Zack. You're going to go along with this. MALIBU Don't play games with me, Bo. Just get out. Of this office, of our lives...just GET OUT. Bo shakes his arm away, and stares down Zack. BOHEMOTH I'm gone. I don't need you channeling whatever problems you have onto me, and I don't need to be misled by this clown over here. You want me out of your business, then fine...but you stay the hell out of mine, because unless our paths happen to cross in that ring, there's no need for them to cross any other time, you got me? Zack doesn't respond, he just stares coldly at Zack. BOHEMOTH I tried to help you. Even a little while ago in the parking lot, I pulled Cortez off you before things got out of hand, and you know what? I wish I didn't. Because someone needs to knock some sense into you, Zack. Thing is, with what you did to Cortez, I don't know that anyone is going to be able to stop him. Bo walks out of the office and opens the door, and standing there is Todd Cortez himself. Bo then steps to the side. BOHEMOTH He's all yours. Cortez charges in, tackling Zack, sending them both spilling over the desk! Cortez lands on top, and is brutalizing Zack with closed fists, similar to his attack last week, and Anglesault calls in for security, who flood the office and pry Cortez off of him. While he's being held back, Anglesault, furious, approaches. ANGLESAULT You got an itch to scratch, Todd. Save it for Angleslam. Because if you attack Zack again before then...I don't care if it's at a house show, at HeldDOWN, or at a god damn Denny's, I will blackball your ass from this entire business, and you can go back to the ghetto with your family and wallow in the fact that you screwed it all up for them. Cortez, being held back, says nothing...but SPITS IN ANGLESAULT'S FACE! Anglesault wipes the spit away, then with the same hand, SLAPS CORTEZ ACROSS THE FACE! ANGLESAULT GET HIM OUT OF HERE! Security drags Cortez out of the office, and Zack gets to his feet. He and Anglesault stare at the sight of Cortez being led away, as we fade to commerical. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2009 HEY! WAIT I GOT A NEW COMPLAINT! With Heart Shaped Box comes Synth Abdull Jabbar and his spiritual leader, Abdullah Abir Nerdly. Dressed in the finest of robes, Abdullah leads the way while singing praises for himself and for his disciple. Wearing white tights with blue clouds, blue boots, and blue tinted goggles Synth twirls a drumstick behind Abdullah. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall for the OAOAST World Title! There is a time limit of sixty minutes. Now making his way to the ring from Sin City, Nevada, he is one half of the three time tag champion Heavenly Rockers, accompanied by Abdullah Abir Nerdly he is….SYNTH ABDUL JABBBBAAAAAAR. The horrible reception from the audience is greeted with a warm embrace by Abdullah who opens his arms wide as he enters the ring. Together he and Synth pray for their safety in this important contest. COLE With a world title match its almost like Synth is being rewarded for attacking D*LUX last week. COACH He’s being rewarded for being an upstanding employee for five years, a company man, a three time tag champion, and a spiritual healer. D*LUX has nothing to do with this. Gimme them bright lights, long nights High rise, overtime Gimme them bright lights, long nights Party till the sun is rising High rise, overtime Working 'till the moon is shining Hot guys, fly girls Never gonna say it I feel on top of the world, I feel on top of the world HUGE GIGANTIC CRAZY POP, YO! From the entrance doors emerges the always hot and sexy Krista Isadora Duncan. Today she represents the boys in the blue, with a blue ruffled mini skirt and Dodgers baseball jersey. Her dancers are dressed similarly in jerseys for every major league team. Not the Pirates though, they suck. Krista twirls through her beautiful dancers, coming to a halt at the center of the stage. She holds the title up with a fetching smile, and the crowd is whipped into a fanatical frenzy! BUFFER From Los Angeles, California…she is a New York Times best selling author, a Hollywood Walk of Famer, CEO of FIT with KID, a four time tag team champion, the 2009 wrestler of the year…YOUR WORLD CHAMPION MISS CALIFORNIA KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAAAAAAAN! Krista strides down a ramp carpeted in glitter and gold, as though she wear on a Paris runaway. At the edge of the entrance stage she whips her head back, tossing her lovely locks and shows the camera another arresting smile. COLE Krista’s youngest daughter, Maya, a manager of D*LUX which caused their to be less money for Holly, resulting in a contract dispute that The Rockers are very upset with. There’s still no movement from Holly on her demands, and there’s talk she could sign elsewhere. Krista sends the viewing audience rushing for the Jergens and tissues as she shows off her ten million dollar legs by hanging upside down the ropes. Its only a mere tease though as Krista quickly flips herself into the ring where….she begins eating a candy bar? “mmmfffthismffffismfffgood!” She exclaims. “You all should have some.” “Hurry up wit dat, Candy Bar!” “I’m sorry, honey,its just that I didn’t get a chance to eat out the dumperster like you did.” Synth does not much appreciate the accusation that he finds nourishment out of a BFI canister, and for that reason comes charging at Krista. Miss California blocks any attack by hooking her arm beneath his and flipping him over with an armdrag. Synth attempts to scurry away but Krista locks him down with an armbar. “First developed by Atriums T. Barr, the armbar is the date rape submission hold of choice by sixty five percent of OAOAST wrestlers. I am not one of those, I prefer the simple pleasure of a sleeper hold, so I’ll release you, honey.” Synth’s arm is spared any more agony, but he’s still on defensive thanks to an irish whip from Krista. He nears her with elbows raised for a double strike, but she swings around his body, and hooks her arms around his neck. Gravity brings them both downwards, but its Synth’s who’s enduring the most pain from the neckbreaker. Despite this he’s back to his feet, and throwing hands at Krista. This does little good as Krista grabs onto his hands and looks at them with curiosity. “Hmmmmmm….my psychic palm reading tells me, a slap in the face is in your future.” SMAAAAACK! Synth reels backwards, clutching his face and shouting profanities at Krista. None of this, however, deters from performing a spinning handstand and kicking him square in the jaw! Synth falls backwards against the ropes, where he’s already breathing in exhaustion. Krista seizes on this wonderful opportunity and charges forward. But Synth has enough strength about him to back drop her over the ropes. But unfortunately for him the world champion comes down right on her heels. Synth spins around into a discus punch, Krista’s thousand dollar shoes send him stumbling backwards. She lifts up her skirt just a tiny bit and wiggles her ass at Abdullah “Sure you still want those 72 virgins?” Leaving Abdullah behind infuriated yet interested. Krista leaps onto the third rope, from their she springs forward and captures Synth into an inverted bull dog! “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” the fans chant, as Krista, ever the arrogant one, also chants for herself. Once done with her self congraglatory actions, Krista starts to bring Synth up from the mat. But he halts her attack by smashing his elbow into her ribcage. He then irish whips the world champion into the ropes. On her return he lashes out with a twirling lariat, but she slides through his legs and ends up going all the way out the ring. “Back, devil witch, back!” Abdullah shrieks. Krista ignores his complaint and reaches into the ring to grab onto Synth’s blue boots. With one quick tug, she trips him up. The Rockers’ drummer smacks his head off the canvas, and wails painfully as a result. Krista continues to torment him this time by tying his shoelaces together without him knowing. She dives back into the ring and happily leaps to her feet. Her hands fall around her baseball jersey’s buttons, and her lips read sultry fire. “Tell ya what, honey, you get to me in ten seconds and these are babies are all your’s” Foolish Synth. Unaware of his predicament and deeply intrigued by Krista’s offer he attempts to complete the mission. But as planned by Krista he falls flat on his face. “Give him a hand, everybody, he’s only half retarded.” Krista smirks. Sadly the referee backs her away while untying Synth’s shoes. COACH Dirty play by Krista. COLE Krista’s not the one that told him to lie there while his shoes are being tied together! Krista slingshots herself into the ring, landing on the second ropes nearest the turnbuckles. She then flips backwards with a corckscrew moonsault and comes down across Synth. As the fans cheer her showy moves, she attempts a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Synth gets his shoulder off the mat. “BOOOOOOOOO!” ABDULAH Let my light guide you against the Jewish infidel, my child! None to pleased with being called and infidel, Krista swings her foot out at Abdullah. He’s barely able to avoid being struck, but he sees justice served as Synth ambushes her from behind. He batters her with elbows to her back, until she fights back with one that smacks against his jaw. While he reels backwards, Miss California leaps onto the third rope. She springboards back and connects with a knee directly onto his face. COLE A HARD shot by the world champion, Krista Isaodra Duncan. COACH She could’ve cracked his goggles! Head ringing and skull aching, Synth has no desire to continue fighting. Thus he rolls out the ring, and lifts up his goggles to rid sweat from his brow. Krista attempts to follow him out side with a baseball slide, but Abdullah wisely pulls him out the way. Krista skids across the outside ring mats, but is quick to scurry upright. This does nothing to aid her however, as Synth strikes the side of her head with a running kick. She slumps against the ring skirt, her face slack with hurt. This leads Synth to slam a roundhouse kick into the back of her head. COLE What strikes by Synth, so much power behind them. The course of this match may have changed. Abdullah and Synth push Krista’s limp body into the ring. The fans pound them with jeers and boos, but Abdullah focuses on providing Synth with spirtual guidance as it relates to this match. His next piece of advice is one that Synth eagerly follows, a sleeper hold that sees him wrapping his arms around Krista’s neck. Krista’s fetching face is contorted by the pain of the sleeper hold. Her eyes water and her breath is shortened, and Synth’s is overjoyed. COLE Both these competitors accomplished tag wrestlers, seven tag titles between them, but Synth has a chance to make his first mark in the singles world in a big way. COACH Looks like this sleeper hold may do the trick. The referee continues to check on Krissy, asking repeatedly if she wishes to surrender. She mumbles weak response, all she can manage due to the amazing pain. “Ask dis bitch, ask dis bitch if she quit!” The goggle wearing brawler shouts. Krista responds to his insult by giving him the middle finger. “YEAAAAAAAAAA!” That one finger salute sends a surge of energy through Krista’s body and she begins a painful fight to get herself upright. “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” the fans cheer, aiding her fight. Much to Synth’s and Abdullah’s dismay, the beautiful champion forces her way towards her feet. Synth decides to release her in order to maintain control. He keeps himself on the attack with a pair of forearms to Miss California’s neck. Weakening her with those strikes, Synth is able to irish whip her into a far corner. He chases after her, rumbling ahead with full speed. But, Krista kicks her ten million dollar legs up and bats the 3 time tag champion away. This allows the fitness queen to scoot up onto the second turnbuckle. As angered Synth approaches once more, the blonde beauty throws herself forward with a flipping lariat that fells the devout Muslim. “Be strong, my child!” Abdullah advises with worry filling his voice. Krista hooks onto Synth’s legs for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! The Synthmeister kicks out at the last possible nanosecond. COACH Mikey, Synth’s gotta find a way to slow down Krista. He was doing it with the sleeper hold, but now she’s back to zipping all around the ring. Krista heads up to her feet, as Synth makes a slow and labored rise. She charges him, seeking to draw first blood. But the Synthmeister levels her with a spinning lariat! The crowd boos the vile assault, but Synth gives thanks to Allah for allowing him to use such a deadly strike. After getting in good with the lord, he attempts a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Krista’s shoulders come off the canvas. “YEAAAAAAAA!” the fans cheer. However their joyful mood is soon turned somber when the challenger traps the champion inside a chinlock. The pain is severe and its not helped any by Synth shouting into Krista’s ear demanding her submission. Eyes widened like a manic preacher, Abdullah leans into the ring and shrieks “God the most gracious, most merciful created women to be submissive to their male masters! You defile god with your resistance!” If Abdullah’s words are true, the lord must have hellish rage as Krista begins to agonizingly push herself upright. This effort is appreciated by the crowd but is ultimately futile thanks to Synth using his strength advantage to force her back downwards. Her teeth grind together in frustration and pain, as the Rocker violently twists her neck back and forth. COLE Synth is doing what you said he had to do, slow down Krista and keep her from running him ragged. “LET’S GO KRISTA! LET’S GO KRISTA! LET’S GO KRISTA!” “Supporters of Krista, you will not escape god’s wrath!” Abdullah shouts with a voice full of anger. Instead of god’s wrath the OAOAST Marks are treated to Krista making a valiant bid for her freedom. Her hands ram into Synth’s paunchy midsection, causing him severe agony. Abdullah shouts for his disciple to hold strong in the face of these blows. But his grip is weakened and the pain is increased with every shot. Abdullah’s eyes are overcome with horror as Krista easily beats away his hold. “Honey, unless you’re on a jelly and crack diet, there’s no reason you should be so flabby. I’m going to get you a free copy of my abs tapes, and all you’ll have to give me in return is your dignity, reason for living, and those goggles.” “No deal, bitch!” Synth screams and then spins around for another discus lariat. But his arm comes down across Krista and she uses that grip to shove him backwards into her outstretched knee. As he howls from the sharp pain in his back, the gorgeous fitness queen hauls him off her knee, in order to drive him into the canavs with a Flatliner. The fans celebrate with rousing cheers while she attempts a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Abdullah rushes to Synth’s aid, putting the former tag champion’s foot on the ropes just mere seconds before the three count. COLE The OAOAST Marks aren’t liking that one, ad neither am I, but in the end that’s what a manager is supposed to do. Synth rolls back to his feet, making certain to put distance between he and the world champion. He pushes himself off the ropes and rushes to her with elbow raised. Krista ducks beneath that attack, and strikes her challenger down with a dropsault that impacts perfectly on the back of his skull. COLE What a shot! What impact from that dropsault! “Synth, honey, how ya feeling?” Krista wonders. Dazed, wounded and possibly concussed Synth replies, “I don’t have to go potty, I have a weiner, daddies have weiners, daddies have three legs.” 50 CENT Krista takes hold of the back of Synth’s goggles and uses them to drag the rockstar off the canvas. She throws him into the ropes. Abdullah makes an effort to grab his ankles, but he’s a second late and Synth is sent running back to Krista. Her lovely legs wrap around his neck, and take him on a dizzying turn with a spinning hurricarana. Krista then pleases the audience with some booty shaking KRISTA Once that’s over Krista flips through the air with a 450 splash that comes down on Synth’s flabby stomach. The referee drops to his knees and counts the resulting pinfall… ONE! TWO! Synth lifts his shoulder off the mat, disappointing a crowd that was certain a three was coming. Having been so close to victory, Krista resolves to finish Synth off and heads up to the top rope to do just that. Bending over to give the crowd as much a peek up her skirt as possible, Krista urges Synth to rise. Once he does that California beauty flies off the turnbuckle with a fantastic swanton press! She collides with Synth and the audience loudy salutes her death defying display. COACH Back to game plan, dawg! You can’t be letting her do these high flying tricks on you. Abdullah faces becomes ghostly white with panic as Krista attempts another pin… ONE! TWO! THREE! NO! SYNTH KICKS OUT! “BOOOOOOOOOO!” Though not at all pleased with the result of her latest pin, Krista clears her mind and focuses on the task at hand. She begins to pull Synth upright, but she’s stunned by him ramming his goggles directly into her forehead. Dizzied and nearly blinded, she’s easily picked apart by a torrent of forearms and elbows. Krista is out on her feet and left terribly weakened by his strikes. This permits the Synthmeister to crack a round house kick around her skull. She plummets downwards, the life all but sucked out her face. Assured that he has the world title in his possession, Synth makes a rather lax cover… ONE! TWO! Krista summons the strength and will to kickout the pin! The fans delight in this and chant her name with gusto. COLE I thought that roundhouse kick could’ve been it, but Krista comes through and hangs onto her world title. Using her vibrant golden hair as a leash, Abdul Jabbar roughly drags her off the canvas. He swirls his fingers through the air, drawing incredible anger from the fans, but also a joyful dance from Abdullah. COACH Percussion is on its way, Mikey! Synth traps Krista’s head into a front facelock as the crowd’s infuriation grows even louder. Krista battles with all her might to avoid the lethal finisher, thrashing her body inside Synth’s grip. This furious struggle bears fruit, and the fitness queen is able to shove Synth away from her. However her good luck ends at that moment; Synth comes back to blast her with a flurry of overhand punches. Krista is weakened by those shots, and her knees buckle under the fire. This enables Synth to grab onto her wrist and chuck her into the neutral corner. She has little time to mount a defense as Synth is already rumbling after her. He leaps forward and lands his slightly pudgy physique into her with a body splash! She stumbles out the corner, her breath labored and heavy. Weak, there’s nothing she can do to prevent Synth from bringing her down with a side Russian leg sweep. Synth drapes his arm across her neck for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! But Krista again ends the pin with a kickout. Thrilled by her fighting spirt the fans return to chanting her name. Confusion settles over Synth, leaving both he and Abdullah wondering how he isn’t world champion at this very moment. COLE Synth thought he had the pin on that one, but Krista never says die, she never gives up, and she keeps on fighting. Synth returns to his feet, tossing his messy hair out his face while cussing out the innocent referee. With eyes narrowed into hateful slits he watches Krista begin to crawl upright. When she’s only halfway off her feet, the goggle wearing brawler strikes at her with his usual mixture of elbows and punches. Next, he pulls her off the ropes and launches her across the ring. But upon her return she makes a surprising recovery that spurs her to twist Synth around with a tornado DDT! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans scream as both competitors lie exhausted across the mat. Synth, however, looks worse for the wear as his hands fall onto his ringing head. COLE Krista may have just turned this match around for good. Synth had no clue that tornado DDT was coming, and he got rocked. COACH Calm down, there’s no way Abdullah lets his disciple miss out on his chance to become OAOAST World Champion. Krista gets Synth off the canvas and places him ina side headlock. She then somersaults forwards, then falls down supine, using the momentum of the flip to twist Synth’s neck and back into the ground. The fans throw out more cheers, delighting in Krista’s signature hold. COLE Confessions of a Kristaholic! And there’s the pin… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! Abdullah again places Synth’s foot on the bottom rope. The crowd is enraged by the speaker of the prophets’ interference, and Krista is as well. Thus they cheer her on, as she walks over to confront Abdullah. The two exchange heated words, with both of them threatening harm on one another. Abdullah’s threat is followed on, as Syth returns to club her in her back. His powerful blows move her away from Abdullah and towards the center of the ring. There she boots her in the stomach, and quickly snaps a front facelock around her head. The finger twirl of doom is given to the hissing audience. Their rage increases tenfold when Synth falls backwards and hits the Percussion DDT! COLE Oh my! COACH Big upset coming, Mikey. Big upset! ”SKY….HOOK….ELBOOOOOOOOOW!” Synth hoots to the booing OAOAST Marks, as his fingers point to the turnbuckles. COACH He’s going to end this match in style! Synth makes his way to the top turnbuckle, as Abdullah dances a dance of celebration on the outside, and the fans boo with all the power inside their vocal cords. Synth stands fully up, holding his arm in crooked position while Krista stirs on the canvas. COACH Get ready! There’s a sudden roar from the audience, one of immense pleasure. Synth’s confused eyes register impending danger. His premonition is correct; Maya Duncan-Blanchard emerges from the back. With shocking speed she’s atop the ring apron. This is disatrious for Synth; Maya shakes the ropes and causes Synth to fall crotch first on the turnbuckles. “PAGAN, NON BEILEVER!” Abdullah shouts and then yanks Maya off the apron! Maya lands on her feet, and because of this she’s able to knock Abdullah to the ground with a single punch! “YEAAAAAAAAAAA!” COLE Mark this date down, it will live on in fame as Maya’s first humiliation of an OAOAST star. COACH The first of many more. Synth can’t register the mayhem on the outside, all his eyes can find is Krista darting up the ropes. She leaps into his chest, with her arms wrapped around his head. She then falls backwards, pulling him along with her, and nearly driving her knees through his chest with the KIDology! COLE A top rope KIDology! So much for the upset, Coach. Krista hooks both of Synth’s leg for the pinfall…. CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! DING DING DING Krista rolls off Synth, and shines with a wide smile towards Maya. Her entrance music fills the air along with raucous cheers from the OAOAST Marks. BUFFER Your winner and still OAOAST world champion….KRISTA ISDORAAAAA DUNCAN! Maya crawls into the ring to give her mother a big hug. It’s a hug that brings more happiness to Krista’s heart than even the world title that’s presented by her. COLE A courageous effort by Synth Abdul Jabbar. But it wasn’t enough to sneak one past the Duncan family. Krista and Maya celebrate together, enjoying the mother daughter moment. But all good things must come to an end, and this celebration is no exception. Leon Rodez appears with chair in hand, lurking behind Krista. She turns around, unaware of his presence and pays for that folly with a chair aimed right towards her! COLE No! But Krista avoids the chair shot by swiping her boot against Leon’s stomach. The number one contender doubles over in pain, leading Krista to pepper him with hard stiff kicks. But Leon fights through the pain they inflict and comes back with wild right hands aimed at the champion. COLE Someone do something! Right on cue the ring fills with backstage officals, security, and even fellow wrestlers. The mass of humanity swirls in front of Leon and Krista, separating them before true harm is none. Neither is very happy about the meddling, and they each try to fight past those who want to keep them apart. Krista even goes as far as to begin crawling on top of people to reach Leon. But realizing her daughter is right there, Krista calms down and settles against the turnbuckles. Leon isn’t so gracious and continues to try and claw his way at Krista as we… FADE OUT Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
