Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted October 30, 2009 I have been on a creative rush latley, I can churn segments out by the hour! THE HOUR! We return from break with a ring filled with the gorgeous girls of the OAOAST, Jade Rodez-Duncan, Maggie Nerdly, Queen Esther, Molly Nerdly, Melody Nerdly, and Melissa Nerdly. On the outside near an apple bobbing tub, sit the judges for the costume contest, Tim Cash, Josh Matthews, and Maya Duncan-Blanchard. Hosting the event is a red rooster dressed Terry Taylor! TERRY TAYLOR Alright, OAOAST Marks, are you ready for the first ever OAOAST Halloween Costume Contest? I bet you are! The boys had their fun on Syndicated now it’s the girls’ turn to get in on the action. Maggie, how about you start off. Wearing a black robe Maggie steps forward. MAGGIE Time to get this contest started right! Ya heard? “YEAAAAAAAAA!” Maggie rips away her robe, revealing her skimpy costume. MAGGIE [IMG=http://i35.tinypic.com/2upv320.gif] TERRY Whooooooo! MAGGIE I'm Krista at her MILFiest! I bet I look as hot as your mom, huh, Jade. You've probably seen her like this, I bet. JADE Far, far, far too many times for my mental health. TERRY This would mark the first time I've seen Krista in her underwear without her poking me in the eye with a fork through the peep hole. Okay, next up we have this….giant cake? Somehow Terry has failed to notice the giant cake sitting between he and Maggie. TERRY Krista must’ve rigged this somehow. I open the top and get swallowed into a dimensional vortex. Or punched out by Chuck Lidell! Well I ain’t afraid of you Iceman! Bring it to me! Bring it to the rooster! I'll slap the taste out your mouth with my cock-a-doodle-doo! LORELEI [IMG=http://images3.hiboox.com/images/3909/74d910df4e475c10bde0adc30466cd81.gif] TERRY Oh wow!!! An impressive costume contest debut, Miss DeCenzo! LORELEI You shouldn’t have expected any less for the Money Honey. TERRY Melissa, why don’t you show us what ya got? MELISSA Obviously you should’ve started with me. But I I can't blame you for your insurmountable shortcomings any more than I can blame a prized heifer for not grasping advanced aeronautics. Save the best for second, and you’ll always come back for seconds. MAGGIE Hey, did you just call youself sloppy seconds? MELISSA No! I just said- MAGGIE It sounds kinda like you’re sloppy seconds. Oh, Reject kicked this chick to the curb, but she’s good for a small coke at Wendy’s and a quick screw in my backseat. That’s what this RAWK chick gets out of it. Ain’t no shame. Better than being thirsty thirds on a lonely Friday night. MELISSA Listen, “homegirl” TERRY Maggie, Melissa- MAGGIE AND MELISSIA SHUT UP! TERRY My feelings! They are has wound! MELISSA Get ready for a show! [IMG=http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y39/Portfree/picklegb2.gif] MOLLY Dear me, Mother let you out the house dressed like that? MAGGIE Hey, I’m still shocked mom even let her out the womb. MELISSA [IMG=http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y39/Portfree/picklegb2.gif] QUEEN ESTHER Oh I just love it to bits and pieces, you’re a Ninja Turtle! How wonderfully charming, Melissa! MELISSA Ninja….tur…..what? Are you blind? I’m a pickle! LORELEI To me, you look like a giant green dildo. Pardon my frankness. MELISSA [IMG=http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y39/Portfree/picklegb2.gif] MAYA I just don't understand why you'd [i]want[/i] to be an oversized pickle MELODY All aboard the fail boat! MAYA Toot toot! MELISSA I don’t have to take any of this from you! You don't appreciate my creativity? Then fine, be like that! I’m out of here! Melissa storms out the ring, talking to herself about the lack of respect shown for her innovative costume. With Melissa out the way, Terry turns to Queen Esther. TERRY And Esther you’ve gone as a maid? QUEEN ESTHER Oh yes, I surely have! I was inspired by the staff at the hotel I am staying it. What a treat they are! Lucius likes to sometimes throw beef paties over the balcony to help provide commoners with something healthy to eat! TERRY Ummm….. QUEEN ESTHER But every once in a while the patties hit the maids on the head! But they don’t complain though. They actually chant incantations….¡los bastardos putrefactos los cogen todos! That’s what they say. It's such a charming thing. MOLLY That’s no incantation, Esther. That’s merely Spanish for “rotten bastards fuck you all.” QUEEN Oh no! I can not take such vulgarities! I...I...I feel as I may faint! TERRY Um….you need some fresh air…try standing on the third rope and see what that'll do for you. QUEEN ESTHER Surely! [IMG=http://i36.tinypic.com/205zhi9.gif] MOLLY How naive! TERRY [img=http://forums.projectcovo.com/images/smilies/thumbsup.gif] TERRY And, Molly what have you gone as? MOLLY Most people would expect me go as a film character or movie star. But tonight I pay homage to the working man and woman! The unsung heros of tomorrow! Those who’s blood sweat and tears provided the life force for this planet. The oppressed proletariat! The downtrodden and the mistreated! The frightened and the bullied! I dress for the freedom of- MAGGIE Yeah, yeah, take it to your commune, Castro. Just tell us what you are! MOLLY Well, I’m a construction worker. TERRY Hmmmmm…..that ring posts has been looking a little loose lately, I see you have tools, could you just drill it in? MOLLY My pleasure! [IMG=http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y39/Portfree/user97_pic1284_1229384385-1.gif] QUEEN ESTHER How naive! TERRY [img=http://forums.projectcovo.com/images/smilies/thumbsup.gif] Molly steps backwards, bringing Jade to the forefront TERRY Jade if you’d do the honors. JADE Sure thing! Jade disrobes to reveal a wonderfully low cut prom dress. JADE I'm a homecoming queen! MAYA (in Jade's voices) I'm only wearing a non skimpy outfit because I'm ashamed of my body! TERRY Don't listen to your little sister. The fact that your mother keeps snipers on me at all hours of the days prevents me from expressing my true appreciation of your costume. JADE Thanks! I think, that’s a thanks. LORELEI Yes, let’s thank him for being one of the few men to gaze at your underdeveloped body. JADE Oh yeah? [IMG=http://i37.tinypic.com/2e169vm.gif] TERRY Now, Lorelei, we’ll have none of that. Melody, how about yourself? Melody rips off her robe to reveal this [img=http://www.ffinsider.net/final-fantasy-7/pix/Yuffie.jpg] TERRY Uh what are you? MELODY OMG, do you even have to ask? LOL at that noob question! Were you living under a rock ten years ago and not playing the greatest playsation game of all time? Final Fantasy VII? Hellooooooooo? Earth to Terry Taylor, come in Terry Taylor, come in. I’m Yuffie! TERRY Knock knock! MELODY Who’s there? TERRY Yuf MELODY Yuf who? TERRY Yuffucked up, your costume sucks! MELODY TO TERRY [IMG=http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y39/Portfree/wGVh8lXY.gif] MAYA That's only the third time this week that's happened to Uncle Terry! Distracting the crowd from the royal beatdown Terry incurs is Christian Wright who steps onto the entrance stage. Wright isn't exactly dressed festively, preferring to stand proud in an Armani three piece suit. "BOOOOOOOO!" COLE Oh great, Christian Wright. The Natural comes to speak. Wright begins walking down the ramp as he speaks, ignoring the protests of the audience. WRIGHT Enough ears have given audience to this lugubrious rollick. It is time those with sets capable of receiving this televisual transmission as well as the gathered assemblage of OAOAST Marks were treated to a speech worthy of all Hallows eve, do you think not. “YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!” the fans chant as CW enters the ring. WRIGHT I suck nothing beyond the air of sweet success that continually swirls around my humble person. But let us return to the subject presented by myself henceforth. MAGGIE What’s the big idea, man? WRIGHT The big idea as you have so rightly put it is an idea based on the core values of human existence. Survival of the fittest. The cold hard logic of Darwin’s theories lives in the very soul of an enlightened being. Me. With each passing victory gained by me in my stunningly profound and shockingly impassioned quest to slay defeat at its very core, I am proving survival of the fittest at its truest most raw moments. My interrupting you is merely little more than an extension of that scientific premise. With the exception of Lorelei, the lot of you trollops and simple gutter slugards, are the weakness consumed in my throughfare to ultimate victory. You mean no more to me than what a gazelle means to a lion. You are but failures, born inferior, to be captured and devoured by the superior specimen of human mastery! Worship the greater lifeform or lie beneath its boot! "BOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Tim Cash has heard enough, and gets up from his judges seat to confront Mister Wright. CASH Mister Wright, I can’t allow you to keep doing what you’re doing. I appreciate that you want time to talk about your winning streak, and I look forward to listening to you do just that. But currently we’re trying to have fun with a costume contest, and we’d appreciate it if you showed us the same respect we’ll show you when its your turn. WRIGHT And who are you to command a god child? CASH Me? I’m only a humble man trying to save you from a clothesline. WRIGHT :huh: Confused Wright turns around, and is smashed in the face by a Baron Windells lariat! The Natural tumbles over the top ropes, and lands inside the apple bobbing tub! Water and fruit flies free of the bucket, pushed out by the superstar that crashes into it. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Lorelei rushes to CW’s aid, while chastising BW for his sneak attack on CW. The rest of the girls, however, are delighted over CW's ordeal and celebrate with the judges and Baron. COLE It seems everyone is a winner! Or everyone except for the undefeated Christian Wright, who chalks up a loss tonight without even wrestling! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
