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Patty O'Green

November Reign 2009

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TV 14

L, V, AND THE BEST MONKEY SEX MONEY CAN BUY!

 

PRESENTED IN HD

 

* DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA *

 

Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid's shock and delight.

 

oao2.jpg

 

THE OAOAST...WHAT THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD IS READING~!

 

Listen to this song as you read the intro

 

EXT. Castle

 

The caste is age worn, dreary, decrypted and wasted away by years of neglect. Countless vines ensare it, trappig it beneath their thorny underbush. Outside a figure in a black cloak ascends stairs’ who’s stone lies chipped by the cruelty of time.

 

INT. Throne room.

 

The thorn room has been invaded by the relentless assault of cob and spider webs. The throne itself looks nothing more than a rusted, weathered, piece of furniture long overdue for a mercy killing. Sitting inside it, is the broken, destroyed corpse of the once king of the castle. On his head rests a crown, that shines in perfect conditions, and reads “KING MALIBU”

 

The black cloaked figure enters the throne room. Stepping past layers of dust, and schools of rodents he approaches the throne. The figure whips his head back, revealing himself to be none other than OAOAST world champion Reject. The champion forces the crown off Zack’s cropse and lays it atop his head.

 

REJECT

This is my November Reign.

 

Spencer Reiger wears the crown.

 

REIGER

This is my November Reign.

 

Alix wears the crown.

 

ALIX

This is my November Reign.

 

Landon Maddix wears the crown.

 

LANDON

This is my November Reign.

 

Holly wears the crown

 

HOLLY

This is my November Reign

 

Morgan wears the crown.

 

MORGAN

This is my November Reign.

 

The entire OAOAST roster, clad in identical black cloaks stands in front of the castle

 

ROSTER

This is our November Reign!

 

REJECT

Long live the king.

 

Fireworks-03-june.gif Fireworks-01-june.gifFireworks-04-june.gif

 

COLE

Folks it is electric here in Toronto, Ontario! We hope you had a fantastic Thanksgiving and didn’t get mauled to death on Black Friday, I am Michael Cole this is Da Coach and we are at November Reign.

 

COACH

Big matches tonight, Mikey. Huge!

 

COLE

You can say that again, let’s get right to one with a SIXTEEN PERSON survivor series match!

 

*DINGDINGDING*

 

As the bell sounds, the teams get together in their corners. Landon leads all seven of his team-mates with a last minute strategy session, while Baron makes it clear he's starting for his team. On the outside, Queen Esther blissfully waves to the crowd.

 

COLE

So let's see who's going to start things off out of this mass of humanity.

 

Eventually the other members of each team line up on the apron. Which leaves Baron to starts things off with Lucius Soul. Lucius combs at his fro, while Baron's eyes wander over to Landon, making it clear who he wants. Baron and Lucius eventually lock up and the big Texan muscles Soul back into a neutral corner.

 

LUCIUS

Yo, step off me brother! Step off me brother!

 

A clean break doesn't placate Lucius, put out at the fact his 'fro got messed with. He combs it back down, glaring at Baron for daring to touch his hair, before they lock up again. Baron quickly wrings the arm and gives it a couple of tugs, giving Lucius something worth worrying about. First tag is made to bring in Ned, to a cheer. Ned lays into Lucius's arm and takes over with the wristlock. Lucius goes to the gut with a knee though. Dishing out two right hands, Lucius then takes Ned over, making the tag to James Blonde.

 

COLE

Plenty of options there to tag here in the early going of this match. But as the eliminations come, this field will whittle down before your eyes. When a man is eliminated, his partner must go too, meaning this first fall will leave one team at an 8 to 6 disadvantage.

 

Blonde tees off on Ned confidently as he comes in. But The Handsome Hustler doesn't stand for that for long. Reaching out for the blonde mane of his fashion conscious opponent, all it takes is one tug from Ned to bring JB down to his knees with a yelp.

 

"HEY! HEY HEY HEY!"

 

Cries of disgust from Blonde's corner rain in, as Ned ignores the referee and makes Blonde suffer a little.

 

COACH

Come on! He's treating him like a cheap hooker!

 

COLE

....

 

COACH

Not that I'd know anything about that.

 

COLE

....

 

Tag is made by Simon and Blonde takes advantage, scurrying away. In comes Scottish Scott to match up with BOSS. The Scot goes to lock up with Simon, only for Singleton to duck underneath and grab a hold of Scott by the BEARD.

 

"HEEEYYY"

 

The cries are now whines as the hair-based offence continues from the Cobras. Scott catches Simon with a back elbow to free his facial features, before they're torn off. Irish whip sends Simon for the ride, but the well-populated apron saves him as a blind tag is made by Blanchard. Simon manages to slide through Scott's legs to save himself, then uses a quick drop toehold to take Scott down, setting him up for the POINTY ELBOW~!

 

COLE

VINTAGE Ned and Simon!

 

Ned covers...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Ned tries to pull Scott up, but he breaks free and tags in Nathaniel Black. Black comes in and immediately blasts Ned with a European uppercut, which changes the mood in a split second.

 

COLE

Here's a man with a lot of frustrations. And eight opponents to take them out on.

 

Backed into a corner, Ned is blasted across the chest with a double palm thrust. And another. Then another European uppercut. All serving to knock the wind out of Ned, while Black walks away and tries a charge. Ned sidesteps in the corner though and Black runs himself into the turnbuckles. Tag is made to MARV, who quickly runs the ropes and nails Black with a running dropkick. Black is knocked back against the ropes behind him, but not down. And he patiently waits for MARV to step his way, before dishing out another European uppercut.

 

COACH

Wow, Nat Black, just blasting dudes like... uh... like a European, I guess.

 

With MARV down Landon suddenly makes himself seen amongst his many partners. Eager for the tag, he gets it, despite Black not being eager to tag out.

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

Landon quickly puts the boots to MARV, stopping for a second to pose for the crowd which almost draws in Baron. Both Blonde and Queen Esther look on with pride as Landon whips MARV to the ropes and delivers a Dropsault! Cover...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Taking too much time picking MARV up, Landon allows the Edmonton native to crawl through the ropes and apply the tag. Annoyed, Landon turns around INTO A BIG KISS FROM MORACCA!!!!!

 

"YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

QUEEN ESTHER

:o

 

COACH

AAH! COVER YOUR EYES, QUEEN!

 

Unable to stand anymore, James Blonde comes in and peels (ew!) Moracca off of Landon.

 

COLE

Jealous much?

 

COACH

Hey!

 

Blonde argues with Moracca (quite the task seeing as he speaks no English), while Landon overcomes the horror of what just happened. And he manages to clear the taste out of his mouth. Unfortunately, he does this by spitting, just as Blonde tries to punch Moracca and he ducks.

 

BLONDE

UGH!

 

Surprisingly, Blonde isn't honoured to be covered in the phlegm of his leader and wretches it back at Moracca... who ducks again, causing Landon to be hit with the spit!

 

COLE

Landon and Blonde getting into some hot spit-swapping action, only here live in the OAOAST!

 

Blonde tries to apologise to Landon, unaware that Mariachi has snuck into the ring. Despite the warnings from their partners. And Los Diablos grab onto the blonde locks of both Landon and Blonde, much to their horror, as their faces are pressed togethe... NO! The Mardi Gras Hellfire Club break up the potential man on mentor action! That draws in The Orange County Cobras, which draws in everyone else, for a MASS brawl!!

 

"YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

COLE

And it did not take long for this one to break down! All sixteen men going at it and good luck trying to control this referee Charles Robinson!

 

The individual brawls spread around the ring and inevitably outside, just a sea of flying fists. Remaining in the ring, Los Diablos lie in wait for Landon and trap him, looking to deliver the Kiss Of Death. However before he can be taken down, Maddix is saved, as Lucius Soul flies in and nails Moracca with the POOOOOUUUUUUNNCCEEEE~!!! That leaves Mariachi still clinging to Landon, easily overpowered and spun into the mat with the Crash Landon '05!

 

COACH

Count ref! Pay attention!

 

COLE

Pay attention!? There's like 7 different fights going on!

 

The ref finally does turn around to see Landon pinning Mariachi, despite Moracca being the 'legal' Diablo...

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!

 

COACH

Yeah! Count it!

 

COLE

Landon gets the pin, but on the wrong member of Los Diablos!

 

COACH

Ah, who cares? They look exactly the same.

 

COLE

Because they're Mexican!?

 

COACH

No, because they're wearing masks and covered from head to toe in pink lycra.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Los Diablos De Fuego

Elimination: Mariachi by Landon Maddix

TEAM LANDON 4(x2) TEAM BARON 3(x2)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Landon has the audacity, amongst all this fighting, to celebrate his pinfall win. He doesn't realise that Ned Blanchard has slid back in behind him and announces himself, via a fist to the face!

 

COLE

The match continues on regardless and with a 6 to 8 deficit for Ned Blanchard to try and rectify.

 

Irish whip by Ned, setting Landon up for a Powerslam!

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Landon backs into a corner, trying to lure Ned in. But The Handsome Hustler is wise to all Landon's tricks and blocks the attempt at a kick to the gut. The sudden nice-guy act doesn't do Maddix any good either, begging off not an escape route. Ned drops the foot and starts to unload with right hands in the corner. Stomps then work their way in, forcing Landon down against the bottom turnbuckle, covered up as best he can against the boots.

 

COLE

Ned stomping an Orange County mudhole in Landon's chest and walking it dry!

 

COACH

Do they have mudholes in Orange County?

 

Pulled back up, Landon is whipped to the opposite corner. Maddix gets a knee up on a Blanchard charge though. The brawls on the outside start to break off and the competitors start to get back on the apron, which allows Landon to tag Danny Boy.

 

COLE

Here comes Danny Boy, that ought to cheer up Queen Esther...

 

COACH

Oh my God, I forgot about the Queen! Is she okay!? She didn't get caught up with any of these fighting brutes, did she!?

 

COLE

I'm sure she's fine. Who cares? Back to the match.

 

COACH

Who cares!? I oughta slap the shit outta you son, disrespecting a Queen like that! Where are your goddamn manners!?

 

Danny Boy works over Ned, clubbing away at the back. Aiming him off with an irish whip Danny then throws a clothesline, but Ned ducks underneath. Putting on the breaks Ned waits, looking to catch hold of Danny Boy for the Stungun, but Danny Boy puts on the blocks and slams a double axehandle into Ned's back.

 

DANNY BOY

*beats chest*

 

COACH

Ach aye, Danny!

 

After a couple more double axes, Danny tries to whip Ned again. But this time, Ned counters. Pulling Danny Boy in, Blanchard gets the double leg pick-up, turns 180 and hits the STUNGUN!

 

"YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

 

COLE

Stungun! And a tag, to Singleton!

 

Simon rushes up the turnbuckles, up top, for the ROCKET LAUNCHER!!! Ned stands guard...

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!

 

"YYYYEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

 

COLE

And just like that we are all evened up!

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: The Last Kings Of Scotland

Elimination: Danny Boy by Simon Singleton

TEAM LANDON 3(x2) TEAM BARON 3(x2)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Queen Esther looks distraught, as her Last Kings are sent to the back. So distraught, she can barely look them in the eyes. Nor Ned and Simon, who wave them bye-bye.

 

COLE

Great job by the Orange County Cobras. That two man deficit never got a chance to be a factor, Ned got right in there and went right to work.

 

COACH

Shame on Danny Boy. Not the performance of Kings, really. Let their Queen down.

 

Regrouping his team, Landon sends Faqu into the ring.

 

COACH

Hmm, what was that I just felt being picked up around me. Oh, that's right, BUSINESS!

 

Ned squares up to Faqu, eyeing up the big Samoan... and decides to let Baron Windels have a go. Baron asks Ned what's up and he feigns a sore hamstring, before encouraging Baron to "go get 'em!"

 

COLE

So the two big men of the teams, Faqu and Baron. I guess Ned can admit when he's not the bigger man after all.

 

COACH

Come on, that was worse than my line!

 

Eye to eye Baron and Faqu staredown, the Samoan growing ever angrier by the second. And he throws a big right. But Baron blocks and slugs Faqu in the jaw! Faqu tries again, but again Baron fires back. Big, Texas sized right hands rock Faqu against the ropes, setting up an irish whip and a dropkick, knocking Faqu off his feet!

 

COLE

Wow! Down goes Faqu!

 

Baron quickly covers...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Wringing the arm Baron controls the wild savage while Tim Cash comes in with an axehandle. Cash bars the arm and brings Faqu down to the mat. An elbow dug in the shoulder has Faqu grunting, which presumably means he's in pain.

 

COLE

One of the best technicians in the OAOAST is Tim Cash. And if he can keep Faqu down on the mat he stands a much better chance against him.

 

Into a hammerlock, Cash drops a knee to the arm. Reaching out for a tag Tim then gentlemanly lets Ned Blanchard in on the fun, working the hammerlocked arm with a couple of knees of his own. Another tag then brings Baron in for more of the same.

 

FAQU

BLARRHAHARGH! RARRRAAHAHGAH!!

 

COACH

I think he's saying that Baron pulled the hair, Cole.

 

COLE

He did not!

 

Baron keeps hold of Faqu as he climbs back to his feet. One hard elbow changes that though. Faqu follows Baron over to the ropes and headbutts him in the shoulder, then tries to throw him into the ropes. But Baron hangs on and pulls Faqu in for a Single Arm DDT! With Faqu down, Baron tries a cover...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Pinning down the arm Baron reaches out for Simon, who comes in off the top with a flying knee to the bad arm!

 

COLE

And Baron's team doing a great job of isolating Faqu from his corner and working on that arm. Not the guy you'd expect them to target.

 

COACH

Yeah, what good is going after Faqu's arm? You think you're going to make him quit?

 

Simon boots Faqu in the gut as he gets back up and tries an irish whip. Even with a bad arm though, Faqu has the strength to put on the brakes. Instead Faqu throws Singleton into a corner and crushes him with an Avalanche!!

 

"OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

COLE

There's the flaw in Team Baron's plan.

 

Tag is made and as Simon staggers out of the corner, James Blonde runs up the turnbuckles and flies in from Simon's blindside with a knee to the side of the head! Cover...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

Kickout!

 

Blonde puts the boots to Simon, before dragging him away from outstretched arms of his allies. A scoop and a slam places Singleton in position near the corner. And Blonde heads up the turnbuckles again. This time, from the second rope, he measures with a big right hand... but MISSES the Marty Jannetty Fistdrop, as Simon rolls out of the way!

 

"YYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!"

 

Rolling to the corner Simon tags in MARV, who comes in swinging. Unloading with right hands MARV runs through Blonde and takes a swing at Lucius and Rico on the apron as well. Blonde tries to take advantage of the lapse in concentration by cutting MARV off with a clothesline, but MARV ducks underneath and comes back at JB with a Running Hurricanrana!

 

COLE

The pace is picking up with The Christ Air Express!

 

Blonde takes another wild swing at MARV and gets caught with a schoolboy...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

NO!

 

MARV tries to charge at Blonde again, but this time The Trendsetter gets an elbow up to block. Blind tag is made to MEL though. And as Blonde charges, MARV leapfrogs, putting Blonde right in the path of a Flying Crossbody from MEL!!

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

NO!

 

COLE

Teamwork like you're only going to see from MARV and MEL!

 

COACH

Yeah, but that doesn't make it any more legal.

 

MEL quickly tries to whip Blonde to the ropes. But Blonde reverses... and with the referee busy putting MARV back on the apron, Landon Maddix takes advantage with a knee to the back!!

 

COLE

HEY! From the outside, Maddix!

 

Stricken, MEL pulls up and falls prey to Illegally Blonde!!

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

COLE

And thanks to an assist, Blonde picks up the fall!

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: The Christ Air Express

Elimination: MEL by James Blonde

TEAM LANDON 3(x2) TEAM BARON 2(x2)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Queen Esther applauds the ingenuity of Landon, who smirks at the fans whilst trying to look nonchalant. So nonchalant that he doesn't notice James Blonde celebrating. And as Blonde tries to get Landon's attention, he doesn't pay enough to Tim Cash, in from behind with an O'Connor roll!

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

"YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

Horror-stricken, Blonde sits on his knees with his hands on his head as finally, Landon turns around, to see that his team's advantage lasted even less time than their first one!

 

COACH

OH NO!

 

COLE

Blonde caught napping! And we are all evened up again!

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: James Blonde and Faqu

Elimination: James Blonde by Tim Cash

TEAM LANDON 2(x2) TEAM BARON 2(x2)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

A despondant Blonde leaves, trying desperately to apologise to Landon at the same time. Meanwhile Nathaniel Black comes in to duke it out with Cash.

 

COLE

Looks like it's bed without dinner for James Blonde tonight! Maybe a few minutes on the naughty step!

 

Blonde continues to plead for forgiveness as he and Faqu are ejected.

 

Back in the ring, Black takes over on Cash with a series of European uppercuts and sends him to the ropes. Black aims for the midsection with a low headbutt, but Cash goes up and over with a sunset flip...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Rolling through, Black takes the legs, looking for a crab hold. With a twist of his body Cash is able to escape, sending Black for a spin as well. Quick tag and Baron Windels comes in, going to work on Black with his Texas sized right hands and a couple of Cowboy Bebop elbows thrown in for good measure. Whipped from corner to corner, Black is set up for the flying BUTT bump of Futuramatude, but moves out of the way. He quickly tags Lucius, who tries to take advantage of Baron's rest in the corner with a Yakuza Kick... but Baron moves out of the way!

 

COLE

Ooh, and Lucius gets crotched!

 

COACH

That's okay. That's not going to hurt a stone cold pimp like Lucius!

 

Once he's able to drag himself off the ring ropes, Lucius turns around and gets nailed with a clothesline. Baron tags in Simon and slams Lucius, for Simon to come off the top with a Flying Kneedrop! Cover...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Lucius rolls away and tries to catch Singleton with a backhand slap, but Simon ducks. A boot to the gut doubles Soul up. Off the ropes Simon then delivers a running kneelift, carrying on off the ropes looking for a clothesline. Lucius avoids him with a leapfrog though, then delivers a Bicycle Kick to Simon as he comes back!

 

COACH

YEAH~!

 

COLE

What a shot, right to the BUTT of the jaw with that boot.

 

Tag is made to Rico, who strokes down the porn 'stache and delivers the big legdrop, pinning Simon down...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Rico slaps on a chinlock, trying to keep Simon from his corner.

 

COLE

It's an interesting line-up we're left with. The eight man tag team champions trimmed in half and Citizen Soldiers side by side with Simon and Ned, who've been far from good citizens in the past. But they're trying to get behind Simon right here.

 

Fighting back to his feet, Simon goes to the ribs with an elbow. A second. And a third. Simon then tries to whip Rico to the corner, but the Brazilian reverses, only to miss with a clothesline in the corner! Simon tags Rico with a couple of right hands, then quickly tags in Ned. The Handsome Hustler comes in swinging, unloading on Rico, then on Lucius who tries to enter the ring illegally to help his partner.

 

COLE

And the old bitter feelings are beginning to spill over between the Cobras and the Hellfire Club!

 

Ned and Simon tee off on Lucius and Rico respectively, all four men in the ring as their partners look on from the apron. Double irish whips set up the Mardi Gras duo for a double BAAAAACK bodydrop!

 

"YYYEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!"

 

COACH

Come on ref, get some control up in this place!

 

With Lucius hurt and rolling out of danger, Rico is left two on one. Simon and Ned set him up, signalling to the crowd that it's time for a special Double Feature. Together they send the Brazilian to the ropes... and deliver the Double Feature Flapjack, not realising that Landon had snuck out a hand while their heads were down. Ned goes for the cover, but the referee refusing to count.

 

COLE

I think a tag was made! Rico's not the legal man!

 

Cussing out the referee, an unsuspecting Ned gets up from the cover. And on one knee, he's BLASTED in the face with a Superkick!

 

"OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

With Ned rocked, Landon quickly picks him up and delivers the GTS, while Black plays blocker, keeping Baron and Cash from getting in...

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

 

COLE

Oh man! The Cobras are gone and it's four on two... I don't think Ned has any idea what hit him!

 

COACH

A classic misdirection play!

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Orange County Cobras

Elimination: Ned Blanchard by Landon Maddix

TEAM LANDON 2(x2) TEAM BARON 1(x2)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Too little too late, but Baron manages to muscle his way past Black and into the ring, to start unloading on Landon with right hands!

 

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

 

The crowd go wild as Landon is pounded senseless, but are left deflated when Black finally cuts Baron off from behind. Black clubs away on Baron, until Tim Cash comes to the rescue and peels Black away. As they do battle, Landon waves for the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club, who quickly aide La Cucaracha in a 3 on 1 beating of the big Texan.

 

COLE

Okay, it's four on two, but that's no excuse for this kind of numbers advantage. You're telling me the referee can spot that blind tag, but he can't see that there's six men in the ring?

 

COACH

He sees it. He just can't do anything about it.

 

COLE

...that's just as bad!

 

Baron ends up being kicked to the arena floor and his three attackers follow him outside, which at least solves Cole's problem. In the ring, Cash and Black exchange forearms, with the Brit getting the better of it. He delivers a European uppercut, putting Cash on the backfoot. Off the ropes Black then looks for a big Lariat, but Cash spins around the back, into a Backslide!

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

NO!

 

Rolling to his feet, Black grabs Cash and tries to cross the arms for the Brittania Bomb. Cash spins out before that can happen, leaping up to crack Black with a quick Enziguri! The Brit wobbles, but doesn't go down. So Cash quickly climbs to the top rope. Black manages to shake the effects of the kick off, but not in time to prevent Tim coming off the top with a Missile Dropkick!

 

COLE

Here we go, Tim's got him, he's got him!

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Tim holds his head in his hands, but doesn't even think of complaining about the count.

 

Meanwhile, on the outside, Baron is fighting back on all three of his opponents. Teeing off on Rico and Lucius, he dishes out right hands, alternating between the two. But in doing so, he loses sight of Landon Maddix, who has bailed to consort with Queen Esther. And before Baron knows what's happened, he's laid out, struck in the back of the head with the SCEPTER!!

 

COLE

LOOKIT... THE SCEPTER!

 

COACH

And the referee didn't see a thing! Brilliant!

 

COLE

Baron is knocked OUT, what is that thing made of!?

 

With Baron KOed, Cash is all alone, but catches a break on Black with a double leg trip allowing him to slap on the MIDWEST SLING! No danger of Black submitting though, as Lucius slides in and blasts Cash with a boot to the side of the head!

 

COLE

And now, it's four on one! Five if you count Queen Esther! Ridiculous!

 

With Landon standing back and looking on proudly, The Mardi Gras Hellfire Club pick Cash back up. Queen Esther cheers her knights on, as they set Tim up. Rico lifts him over the shoulders, as Lucius comes off the turnbuckles with the MOUSTACHE RIDE/SWINGING DDT COMBO!!!!

 

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

COACH

Spiked him!

 

With Cash motionless, Landon strolls over and kneels down on Cash's chest, with a huge grin on his face.

 

COLE

Oh come on!

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

QUEEN ESTHER

YAAAAAY!!

 

*DINGDINGDING!*

 

The Queen jumps for joy, clapping her hands, as Landon stands up as nonchalantly as he had gotten down.

 

BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen, your winners and sole survivors... THE MARDI GRAS HELLFIRE CLUB... and, NATHANIEL BLACK and LANDON MADDIX!!!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

 

COLE

And after all that, Landon had to get the glory. Gimme a break.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Citizen Soldiers

Elimination: Tim Cash by Landon Maddix

SOLE SURVIVORS: MARDI GRAS HELLFIRE CLUB, LANDON MADDIX and NATHANIEL BLACK

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

The Queen climbs into the ring to join the celebrations, as Landon shares a handshake with both Rico and Lucius on a job well done. As she skips into the ring Queen Esther is then taken by the hand by Landon, who kisses the hand and raises it in victory.

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

 

COACH

Bravo! Bravo!

 

COLE

Oh, please. This is sickening.

 

Landon, the Queen and her Hellfire Club continue to lord it over everybody in the ring, with Black happy to have won too, but not one for 'lording it'. Or 'happiness', really.

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NO HOMO PREVIEW!

 

Maggie Nerdly stands inside the ActionZone at OAOAST HQ in Pittsburgh (blah!), PA.

 

MAGGIE

What's up, ya'll? Its the It Girl on the Scene, Maggie Nerdly here to bring you the latest screenshots and preview of No Homo. I don't wanna waste any of your time and take away from this kick ass show, so lets cut right to the chase!

 

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LEON RODEZ ENTRANCE

 

MAGGIE

Am I gonna have fun whuppin his ass, or what!

 

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VINNY VALENTINE ENTRANCE

 

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LEON VS VINNY

 

~~~~

VINNY VALENTINE

Overall: 73

Abilities: Dirty Pin, Taunt Theif

~~~~

 

~~~~

LEON RODEZ

Overall 99

Abilities: Dirty Pin, Evasive Dodge, Object specialist, Move thief, Kip up, Possum Pin, Ring Escape

~~~~

 

MAGGIE

A 99 for Leon? Well, he sure ain't a 99 in bed, I'll tell ya that much! Aight, gang, that's all we got for today, stay tuned for more OAOAST No Homo 2010!

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NR09sstag.jpg

 

“The World is Mine” by David Guetta plays the Can-Am Assassins and LDC Moneygang to the ring.

 

BUFFER

This is a Survivor Series match. Introducing first, accompanied by LORELEI DECENZO…team captains SPENCER REIGER and COLIN MAGUIRE, JR… THE LDC MONEYGANG!! And their partners, FELIX STRUTTER and KEN PANTERA… THE CAN-AM ASSASSINS!!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

COLE

Self-appointed team captains, I might add.

 

COACH

I don’t see the Can-Am Assassins complaining.

 

COLE

You ought to call the OAOAST Hot Newzline more often.

 

As the heels loosen in the ring, “Shine” by Collective Soul hits.

 

BUFFER

And their opponents! First, the reigning TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS OF THE WORLD and captains… CHARLIE MOSS, QUENTIN BENJAMIN… TEAM HEYROSS!!! And their partners… DEUCE DEUCE BIGELOW and JUMBO!!

 

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

 

Red, white and blue pyro shoots off behind Team Heyross, Deuce and Jumbo as they pose.

 

COLE

Arguably the most decorated tag team in OAOAST history, Team Heyross enter tonight fresh off two successfully title defenses against the men opposite them, Deuce and Jumbo.

 

COACH

Lady luck’s been on their side recently, but she always finds a new favorite, Cole. It’s only a matter of time before we have new tag team champions.

 

The pre-match gear is tossed aside and we’re ready for action.

 

* DINGDINGDING *

 

Reiger mocks Deuce’s weight at the start, pretending to be out of breath after one step. A wry smile on his face, Deuce calls for Reiger to lockup. They do and Reiger goes straight for the eyes, blinding Deuce momentarily. Reiger drives Deuce face-first into the boot of CMJ and then tags out. Irish uppercuts and leg strikes rock Deuce against the ropes before he’s sent for the ride, but CMJ is unable to hit THE CAMBRIDGE CURSE (Stun Gun) as he legs give out and Deuce lands on top!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

SAVE BY REIGER!

 

COLE

What a mistake that was. I can’t believe CMJ actually thought he could get Deuce up.

 

COACH

Obviously Deuce packed on a few extra pounds during Thanksgiving, otherwise CMJ would have gotten him up with ease.

 

Jumbo tags in and hammers away on CMJ, then whips to the buckle for a corner avalanche splash! Reiger charges in, but Jumbo moves and splashes both men in the corner!

 

COLE

This is payback right here. You know Deuce and Jumbo haven’t forgotten how CMJ and Reiger beat them a few weeks ago on OAOAST Syndicated.

 

Quentin Benjamin receives the tag and catches CMJ with a SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

Benjamin wrings the arm and tags Moss, then executes a drop toehold while Moss delivers a leg drop off the ropes.

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

NO!

 

CMJ kicks out again. Although maybe CMJ wishes he hadn’t after Moss rams him into THE HEAD of Deuce!

 

COACH

Don’t say it, Cole.

 

COLE

Talk about using your head!

 

COACH

I just knew you couldn’t resist that cliché.

 

Another head BUTT follows, and then a RUNNING POWERSLAM, but instead of going for the cover Deuce attempts a vertical diving head BUTT only to have CMJ move.

 

COACH

Now that’s NOT using your head.

 

Reiger gets the tag again, but runs into a backdrop! Reiger begs off in the corner, a ploy to sucker the big man in, but Deuce blocks a kick and delivers an atomic drop! Reiger stumbles to the wrong corner and receives blows from all 3 men on the apron, and then a DROPKICK BY DEUCE!

 

COLE

What agility for a man that size!

 

Deuce introduces Reiger to the turnbuckles of both neutral corners, but Reiger manages to reverse a whip and CMJ knees the Flaming Gigolo in the back! A tag is made and CMJ works Deuce over in the heel corner, stepping away when instructed so his teammates can get in their cheap shots.

 

COLE

Where’s the second official to breakup this nonsense?

 

COACH

Is it that time of the month, Cole? You’re awfully moody tonight.

 

Sure enough, the outside official rushes over to put an end to the triple-teaming. Then for the first time tonight a member of the Can-Am Assassins sees ring action, as Felix Strutter tags in. A series of body shots follow before Strutter attempts a DOUBLE UNDERHOOK SUPLEX, but Deuce counters with a backdrop. Strutter tags Pantera and the strongman clubs Deuce across the back, and then slams him easily!

 

COACH

That’s power right there, baby boy.

 

COLE

You aren’t kidding. I’ve never seen anybody slam Deuce with such ease.

 

In case anybody thought it was a fluke, Pantera executes a DOUBLE UNDERHOOK STALL SUPLEX!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

The Can-Am Assassins tag, but Pantera stays in to hold Deuce up for Strutter.

 

COLE

Come on, ref. You gotta get Pantera out of there.

 

COACH

Don’t worry about it. They have until the count of 5.

 

Strutter makes his move as does Deuce and Pantera takes the brunt of a HIGH ROUNDHOUSE KICK!

 

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

 

Deuce PRESS SLAMS a stunned Felix Strutter, then tags Jumbo. Strutter spots the big fella headed his direction and tags CMJ, who goes toe to toe with Jumbo. CMJ gets the worse end of the exchange and ultimately finds himself in a BEARHUG!

 

COLE

We’re gonna have our first elimination at any moment.

 

Reiger enters to lend his partner a hand but gets cut off by Deuce.

 

COACH

We’ve got all 4 men in the ring.

 

Deuce shoots Reiger in for a HANDSPRING ELBOW, then whips him towards Jumbo who delivers a BIG BOOT. Jumbo returns the favor and Deuce levels CMJ with a SPINNING WHEEL KICK.

 

COACH

I don’t hear you crying about the officiating now, Cole. Deuce and Jumbo have been in the ring well over the allotted 5 seconds.

 

COLE

The referee must feel things aren’t too out of handle. And I’d have to agree. It’s organized chaos, not chaotic.

 

Jumbo bounces off the ropes for the XL SPLASH~!!!

 

The cover.

 

But first the ref must get Deuce out of the ring, which allows Reiger to nail Jumbo with a TOP ROPE KNEEDROP!

 

COLE

No!

 

Reiger places CMJ on top and exits.

 

The count.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!!!

High-fives all around in the CAA/LDCMG corner. Needless to say that isn’t the case on the other side.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1st elimination: Jumbo

eliminated by: Spencer Reiger (pinfall)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COACH

It’s 4 on 3, Cole.

 

Strutter gets the tag and is immediately greeted by Benjamin. Benjamin fires Strutter into the ropes after a brief exchange, but Strutter counters Benjamin’s hip toss with a TRAPPED ARM BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

Strutter slams Benjamin mid-ring and climbs to the top, only to be met by Benjamin who runs up the ropes to execute a RELEASE OVERHEAD BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX!!!

 

COLE

Oh, my!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THR-- NO!

 

Strutter kicks out and just barely. Team Heyross tag and they perform a cradle hip toss back suplex.

 

Again the cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

Moss brings Strutter to his feet and is raked across the eyes. Pantera receives the tag and charges in…to an arm drag!

 

And a second!

 

And a third!

 

SUPERKICK catches Pantera off-guard, and Moss capitalizes with a GERMAN SUPLEX!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

NO, KICKOUT!

 

Deuce tags in and hammers Pantera. Big head BUTT stuns both men briefly, then Deuce whips Pantera in for a dropkick. Like the tattoos on his head, Deuce is on fire. The Flaming Gigolo delivers a FALCON ARROW and then a TOP ROPE FLYING HEADBUTT… BUT NOBODY’S HOME!

 

COACH

More like “I’m out cold, Medina,” than Funky Cold, huh, Cole?

 

Since it’s PPV, Pantera busts out THE APOLLON’S WHEEL~!!!

 

“OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!”

 

COLE

Another incredible show of strength by Ken Pantera.

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!!!

 

Reiger is quick to let Team Heyross know it’s 4 on 2 now.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2nd elimination: Deuce Deuce Bigelow

eliminated by: Ken Pantera (pinfall)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COACH

Team Heyross might as well forfeit, Cole. The odds are stacked against them.

 

COLE

Although I don’t like their chances, if anybody can pull this off it’s Team Heyross.

 

Moss again catches Pantera off-guard, this time with a SCHOOL BOY!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

Pantera knees Moss and tags Reiger, who gets taken down by a drop toehold. Moss floats on top to apply a side headlock, but Reiger shoves him off and a blind tag is made. Reiger leapfrogs Moss on the rebound, then gets undercut by Benjamin as Moss delivers the clothesline!

 

COLE

Double Goozle!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

Benjamin stays on the offensive, taking to the air to hit a FLYING CROSSBODY…BUT REIGER ROLLS THROUGH AND HOOKS THE TIGHTS!!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THR-- NO, KICKOUT!

 

Both men pop to their feet, but it’s Reiger who strikes first connecting on a standing dropkick. Benjamin falls outside where’s he’s triple-teamed by the Can-Am Assassins and CMJ.

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

The outside official rushes over to restore order, but the damage has been done. Reiger tosses Benjamin back inside and performs his signature SLINGSHOT DOUBLE STOMP!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

COACH

Somebody tell that idiot he’s better off living to fight another day.

 

COLE

I’ve told you before, there’s no quit in Team Heyross. If they go down they’re gonna do it swinging.

 

Reiger signals for CMJ to head up top.

 

COACH

If they hit this it’s gonna be 4 on 1, Cole.

 

“This” being THE SPIKE REIGER COUNTER, but Benjamin takes Reiger down and SLINGSHOTS him towards the corner, causing the LDCMG to collide! CMJ tumbles to the floor while Reiger stumbles back at Benjamin, who executes a VERTICAL SUPLEX INTO SITOUT POWERBOMB!!!

 

COLE

Orange Crush!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!!!

 

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

3rd elimination: Spencer Reiger

eliminated by: Quentin Benjamin (pinfall)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Lorelei throws her arms up in disgust, then proceeds to scold the Can-Am Assassins.

 

COACH

Looks like Lorelei is coaching up her team, Cole.

 

Just as that’s said Lorelei SLAPS Strutter!

 

COLE

I don’t know about that.

 

COACH

Obviously Lorelei subscribes to the Bobby Knight method of coaching.

 

Strutter gets in Lorelei’s face, but CMJ comes to her defense. An argument ensues and CMJ walks away with Lorelei and Reiger.

 

STRUTTER

 

 

COLE

Is he leaving?

 

COACH

It appears so.

 

The referee starts to count CMJ out.

 

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

FOUR!

FIVE!

SIX!

SEVEN!

EIGHT!

NINE!

TEN!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4th elimination: Colin Maguire, Jr.

eliminated by: Count out

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

Some co-captain CMJ is. I can’t believe he took his ball and went home.

 

COACH

I’m at a loss myself. Maybe both teams weren’t as close as I thought.

 

Moss brings Strutter in the hard way. Strutter calls for a time out but gets a kick to the sternum instead! Moss fires Strutter across for a corner clothesline, then climbs onto the middle rope and unloads.

 

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

FOUR!

FIVE!

SIX!

SEVEN!

EIGHT!

NINE!

TEN!

 

Strutter drops to his knees, gets turned over and has his legs grapevine, but a clubbing forearm by Pantera breaks up the attempted Mossy Knoll.

 

COLE

The Can-Am Assassins dodged a bullet. Had the Mossy Knoll been applied it would’ve been 2 on 1.

 

COACH

At least try to hide your bias, Cole. You’re practically drooling at the prospect of Team Heyross being up 2-1.

 

After Strutter rams Moss into the boot of Pantera, he tags out. Pantera keeps Moss in the corner for a series of shoulder thrusts, then executes a GORILLA PRESS SLAM!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

Looking to squeeze the fight out of Moss, Pantera applies a BEARHUG.

 

COACH

Listen to Moss’s back snap, crackle and pop, Cole.

 

Benjamin encourages the crowd to rally behind Moss, and it seems to work as Moss slips an arm inside, but Pantera dashes any hope of a comeback with a TRAPPED ARM BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

KICKOUT!

 

Strutter receives the tag and executes a fall away slam, then steps out on the apron for a SPRINGBOARD HURRICANRANA…only to have Moss counter with an STO BACKBREAKER!!

 

“OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!”

 

In a world of hurt Strutter does the Curly Shuffle, and then tags out. Moss evades a charge, sending Pantera crashing hard sternum-first into the buckle, then delivers a HALF-NELSON SUPLEX which is followed by a tag and TOP ROPE BULLDOG!

 

The cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!!!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

5th elimination: Ken Pantera

eliminated by: Quentin Benjamin (pinfall)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

What turn of events. Team Heyross found themselves down 4-2. Now they’re up 2-1. Incredible!

 

COACH

Yeah, but CMJ was not counted out, not pinned. We could bring him back to even the odds. Right? RIGHT?!?

 

COLE

Listen to yourself. You’re in denial.

 

Reality sets in on Strutter, evident by the look on his face.

 

STRUTTER

 

 

Strutter puffs his chest and asks Team Heyross if they want some, to which they nod and motion for him to come on in. But Strutter has a change of heart and leaves, pointing to his head walking up the aisle.

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

COACH

Here’s a man who gets it, Cole. The odds are stacked against Felix so he’s gonna live to fight another day.

 

COLE

Who’s to say he can’t rally from being down 2-1? Team Heyross did and it was 4-2. Speaking of which, it’s funny how Strutter claimed Team Heyross were ducking him and Ken Pantera, yet he‘s the one running from a fight.

 

The referee starts to count Strutter out…

 

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

FOUR!

 

…but Team Heyross catch up to him jawing with fans and drag his ass back to the ring.

 

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

 

Strutter pleads for mercy, but eats a DOUBLE FLAPJACK and is put away with THE SUPER ROCKER DROPPER~!!!!

 

Moss covers.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!!!

 

COACH

I think I’m gonna puke.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

6th elimination: Felix Strutter

eliminated by: Charlie Moss (pinfall)

SOLE SURVIVORS: Team Heyross

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

*DINGDINGDING*

 

BUFFER

Here are your winners and sole survivors… CHARLIE MOSS, QUENTIN BENJAMIN… TEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

 

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

 

“Shine” by Collective Soul plays as Team Heyross’ hands are raised in victory.

 

COLE

They’ll be talking about this one for years, Coach. Just a truly remarkable performance by Team Heyross to overcome a 4 on 2 deficit.

 

COACH

As much as it pains me, I gotta give Team Heyross their due. A lot of teams would’ve quit, maybe even should quit with those odds, but they kept fighting. I can’t wait to hear what the LDC Moneygang have to say about this.

 

COLE

You won’t have to wait long. They’re standing by with our broadcast colleague Tony Brannigan.

 

We cut to the Enterprise’s private dressing room where CMJ and Spencer Reiger are dining on turkey legs.

 

BRANNIGAN

Spencer Reiger, CMJ, I gotta tell you, for two guys whose team just LOST you sure don’t seem too upset.

 

CMJ

(mouthful)

It couldn’t happen to a bunch of nicer guys.

 

REIGER

More like a pair of TURKEYS if you ask me. I mean, some partners the Can-Am Assassins were. The whole concept of tonight’s show is teamwork. So why the hell did they stand on the apron with their thumbs up their ass while CMJ laid in on the floor in a world of hurt and I got spiked with the Orange Crush?!?

 

Suddenly a lot of screaming and shouting is heard in the halls. Then the door kicks open and THE CAN-AM ASSASSINS enter.

 

STRUTTER

THERE YOU ARE, YOU SONS OF BITCHES!

 

With that all hell breaks loose as the LDC Moneygang and Can-Am Assassins go at it backstage. OAOAST officials quick to rush in and separate the four.

 

COLE

Tony, be careful back there.

 

We cut back to Sofa Central once the action cools. Cole and Coach both stunned.

 

COACH

I don’t know what else to say after that.

 

We're taken to an exterior image of the Air Canada Centre

t3.jpg

 

COLE

Folks, thank you for joining us on this November Reign, lots more matches coming up!

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COLE

And now, folks, we're gonna go on location to Toronto's uptown roll arena! It's time for the Skate or Die match for the OAOAST Heartland title!

 

Cut to the rink, where a DJ is seen behind glass.

 

NOTE: Visual aid for the match.

 

rollarenamap.jpg

 

DJ

Yo yo yo, ladies and gentlemen, a little somethin' special for y'all tonight! The OAOAST is in the house! The Heartland title is on the line! This is DJ AX, and I'm gonna introduce the participants!

 

The participants are shown surrounding the rink, which already has people skating on it.

 

DJ AX

Show some love for the BURROUGH BOYS! Mariano! Luther! Waldo! Quincy!

 

COLE

And there's paying customers on this rink, Coach! Let's hope no one gets hurt here.

 

COACH

Of course not, Cole, this is a Heartland title match!

 

DJ AX

The Superheroes of Dance! Vinny Valentine! Biff Atlas! PANIC AT THE DISCO!

 

Vinny does a little dance, as Tony Tourettes stands by, also wearing skates.

 

DJ AX

The man behind the mask! J-MAX!

 

J-MAX raises his arms in the air.

 

DJ AX

Uno and Dos! The Voo Doo Daddies! LOS CONQUISTADORES!

 

Uno and Dos are shown talking back and forth with Colombian Heat.

 

DJ AX

Yo, this girl's got a fever, and we got the cure! Anderson and Pigley, THE LOVE DOCTORS!

 

The Docs do a dance as the ladies scream from the rink.

 

DJ AX

Someone be kind and donate a little change for DEADBEAT DAVE!

 

Vinny and Biff clap as Dave holds his arms out.

 

DJ AX

The Bad Boy himself, COLOMBIAN HEAT!

 

Heat throws up the "W".

 

DJ AX

No fightin' the law tonight, we got the V.I.C.E. squad in the house! CPA and Bosley, reppin' the Enterprise!

 

Bosley talks smack to Todd Cortez.

 

DJ AX

"Urban Legend"...or just a Legend? TODD CORTEZ!

 

Cortez pounds his chest and raises a fist in the air.

 

DJ AX

This is a Skate or Die match, but things are still getting deadly! From the Deadly Alliance, MR. DICK, and Mr. Heartland himself, SANDMAN9000!

 

The DA members raise their arms.

 

DJ AX

And finally, our defending champion! He puts the "Heart" in Heartland, and the "Jam" in Jamaica! The OAOAST Heartland champion, DENZEL SPENCER!

 

Denzel raises his arms, then DJ AX blows a horn and the combatants walk onto the rink, and begin to attempt to slug it out while on skates. Various songs play in the background, as some of the combatants start to gain speed around the rink. CPA and Bosley lift Heat onto their shoulders, with CPA holding him around the head and Bosley holding him around the waist. However, this leaves them open to a surging Denzel, who leaves his feet and flies into Heat, which causes CPA and Bosley to fall to the ground as well!

 

COLE

Nice move there by Denzel, as he's putting this environment to good use right away!

 

Suddenly the track scratches, and Black Sweat by Prince hits.

 

COLE

Oh wait, this is a familiar song...

 

COACH

Oh fuck, is that what I think it is?

 

The camera cuts to the front door, where MISTER Warrior bursts through and pounds his chest.

 

COACH

DAMN it.

 

MISTER Warrior rolls over to the half wall, and hops over it onto the rink. He gains speed around the rink while pumping his arms in the air, then floors Quincy with a clothesline! He then hits Biff! Waldo! Luther! Mariano! Dave! Vinny! He pounds his chest, then crashes waist-first into the half wall and flips over it into the carpeted area.

 

COLE

Well, that was exciting!

 

MISTER Warrior then skates around the carpeted area, into the arcade, where Tony Tourettes is playing Tekken. Tony looks up, and sees Warrior. The two stare each other down briefly, then MISTER Warrior lets out a huge roar, which is returned by Tony. Both men then simultaneously pound their chests, and begin to engage in a Tekken battle while continuing to yell at nothing in particular. Meanwhile, CPA drags Denzel into the arcade with them, and lifts him overhead, then presses him onto a skeeball ramp!

 

COLE

Look at this, CPA looking to gain a pinfall on Denzel already!

 

CPA grabs one of the skeeballs, and loads his hand with it, then drills the recovering Denzel with the GIGATON PUNCH~!!!!!11111 Cover...

 

1...

 

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

 

3!!!

 

COACH

All right, CPA!

 

COLE

And we've got a fall!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MAN TO BEAT: CPA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

CPA gloats, until Sandman flies into the picture, hopping onto one of the round booths, then hopping into CPA with a dropkick! CPA stumbles back onto the floor, then Sandman lays roller skate stomps into his body as he lays on the ground.

 

COACH

Hey, Sandman's pretty good on those skates!

 

Back to the rink, where the Burrough Boys all kind of stand out of the way at the wall.

 

COLE

And the Burrough Boys taking it easy over there right now!

 

Cortez slugs it out with Sandman just outside the arcade, while CPA comes to and hammers away on Dr. Pigley. Vinny, Biff, and Dave work together on Colombian Heat, but Dr. Anderson comes to his aid (get it? lol), going to work on Dave. Heat fights his way back on Vinny and Biff, as Anderson makes his way over to help Pigley with CPA. The Love Docs execute a double slam on CPA! Bosley attempts to help his partner, but is met with right hands! The Docs then take off around the ramp, gaining speed, and floor Bosley with a double clothesline!

 

COLE

High-impact double clothesline!

 

Meanwhile, J-MAX manages to climb onto the half wall, waiting on CPA, and hits him with a flying bodypress!

 

1...

 

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

 

3!!!

 

COLE

And J-MAX with a fall on CPA!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Man to beat: J-MAX

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The Burrough Boys are surrounding the foozball table as Luther and Waldo compete in a game. Meanwhile, Mr. Dick slides a Conquistador across the skate return counter into the back room, and follows him over. They slug it out, while Deadbeat Dave hammers away on J-MAX. The other Conquistador makes his way to the skate return booth shortly after.

 

COLE

I've just been informed that 5 minutes have passed in the match! Only 10 minutes remain!

 

Denzel and Heat dive right into the Burrough Boys, which doesn't prove to be wise as the BB's quickly make it a 4-on-2 assault, with Mariano and Waldo hammering away on Denzel, and Luther and Quincy doubling up on Heat. Mariano and Waldo hold Denzel up against the lockers on the wall, while Luther sets up Heat for a battering ram, and Quincy gains speed on his skates and pushes the two towards Heat. However, Denzel manages to escape the grip, and Heat shoves Luther off into Mariano and Quincy!

 

COLE

The Burrough Boys had a big move set up there, but Heat and Denzel turned it around!

 

Quincy makes another dash towards Heat, but he catches him with the momentum and shoves him into the other BB's! Heat makes his way over to Luther, and drags him into the women's bathroom, while Denzel works over Mariano. He drags Mariano to the concession stand, and they fight their way into the back.

 

COLE

Into the concession stands!

 

Vinny and Biff work over J-MAX, scooping him up and dropping him across the half-wall! Vinny then makes his way to the concession stand, as Biff skates back up onto the carpet, then climbs onto the wall, and drops a leg across the back of the head of J-MAX! He then pulls himself to his feet, and drops a knee to the sternum for good measure, then covers...

 

1...

 

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

 

3!!!

 

COLE

Look at Biff FLY off that wall!

 

COACH

:rolleyes:

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Man to beat: Biff Atlas

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Biff celebrates, as we cut back to the concession stands to catch Denzel removing the slush puppy tank, and dumping the contents onto Vinny's head!

 

VINNY

AAAH! COLD!

 

Vinny arches back and dances around in a circle as the icy beverage runs down his back. Seconds later, a familiar tune comes over the arena.

 

Cut to 6:54

 

 

All the combatants (including MISTER Warrior and Tony Tourettes) as well as all the customers make their way to the rink and get in formation, then Denzel rolls into the scene front and center. The music hits, and everyone begins to dance.

 

COLE

Well, we thought we'd seen it all in the OAOAST, but this is a first! The Heartland title match has broken out in song and dance!

 

The dancing continues, but once the lyrics kick in, Heat drills Biff with a PELE KICK~! and covers him...

 

1...

 

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

 

3!!!

 

COACH

What a party pooper!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Man to beat: Colombian Heat

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The BB's pound on Heat, but the Love Docs quickly join in. The crowd moves over closer to the half-wall, where the Conquistadores climb onto the wall, and both jump on top of the seven-man pile!

 

COLE

Look at this!

 

Vinny and Biff stand on the carpet on the other side of the half-wall, while Dave stands in front of the entrance door. Dave skates towards Vinny and Biff, picking up speed, and Vinny and Biff catch him, double-hiptossing him onto the pile of people!

 

COACH

Look at that teamwork!

 

Sandman skates onto the rink and reaches over the wall, ramming Vinny and Biff's heads together, then climbs onto the wall, and does an ugly-looking backflip on top of the pile!

 

COLE

And Sandman with a moonsault attempt, tough to do with those skates on, but down goes the mass of people once again!

 

As the people get up once again, Mr. Dick puts his arms around the shoulders of CPA and Bosley at the far end of the rink, and the two grab MD's head in a battering ram. The three men pick up their speed, charging into the group of combatants, and crash into everyone, as everyone falls to the ground!

 

COLE

Look at the carnage!

 

DJ AX

Five minutes left in the match! FIVE MINUTES!

 

The mass of people start to come to their feet, and Heat makes a dash at Sandman...who pulls a defenseless skater in the way, causing Heat to collide into him!

 

COACH

:lol:

 

COLE

And Sandman just sacrificed one of these paying customers to dodge that attack from Heat! This is something we feared would happen!

 

Sandman grabs the dazed Heat, and PLANTS him with a DDT onto the floor!

 

COLE

And a DDT right into the hardwood skating floor!

 

Cover...

 

1...

 

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

 

3!!!

 

COACH

Uh-oh, this could be the start of another reign of terror for Sandman!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Man to beat: Sandman9000

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Cortez attacks Sandman from behind, as the camera cuts to the skate return booth, from where a huge cloud of smoke emerges from the window.

 

COACH

What the hell's going on here?

 

The cameraman fights through the smoke cloud to find Vinny, Dave, Tony, and the BB's sitting in a circle, indian-style, on the floor in the backroom where all the skates are kept after they're returned.

 

COLE

Well, those guys aren't going to win the title that way!

 

COACH

My boys are like "fuck this, let's go toke it up!"

 

MD helps Sandman out, as the two double-team Cortez. They start to set up a double-team move, but J-MAX comes to his aid, hammering away on MD.

 

DJ AX

Three minutes to go in the match, THREE minutes!

 

COLE

And Sandman9000 is just three minutes away from becoming a two-time Heartland champion!

 

Sandman skates up to the concession stand and grabs a Coke, swigging it down, then catches Pigley coming after him with a kneelift, and slams his face into the counter. Sandman attempts to skate over and hit Cortez with a tope over the half-wall, but Cortez moves and Sandman lands with a splat on the floor! Cortez then gains speed going around the rink, and Denzel sneaks up and shoves Sandman from behind, right into a SPEAR from Cortez!

 

COACH

:o

 

COLE

What a spear!

 

Denzel and Cortez dive in, and CPA, Bosley, J-MAX, the Docs and Conquistadores all pile on top of Sandman!

 

1...

 

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

 

3!!!

 

COLE

And Sandman was pinned in a dogpile! But who get credit?

 

DJ AX

It's the TWOOOOOOOO Minute Warning!

 

The referees pull the bodies off the top of Sandman, and Denzel is revealed to have snuck in for the pin just before Cortez!

 

COLE

And Denzel is going to get the credit for the fall!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Man to beat: Denzel Spencer

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Cortez hammers Denzel, and the two begin to slug it out. Cortez gets the better of the exchange, then backs up and dashes towards Denzel, who drops to the ground, as Cortez hits the wall and flips over into the carpeted area!

 

COLE

And Denzel's going to go on the defensive here!

 

The BB's, Vinny, and Dave are seen stumbling from the back. Vinny stumbles on his skates, and falls to the ground, as he and Mariano laugh uncontrollably.

 

COACH

:lol: Those guys are wasted!

 

Seconds later, MISTER Warrior and Tony emerge from the back, arm-in-arm. Both guys let out a roar, which turns into rumbling laughter halfway through.

 

DJ AX

ONE MINUTE, contestants!

 

COLE

Less than a minute left in this one!

 

Denzel skates onto the carpeted area, fending off various attacks. Sandman has removed one of the bars from the foozball table, and begins hammering the combatants going after Denzel.

 

COACH

Look, that's one of those things from the foozball table! See the little guys on there?

 

COLE

Sandman trying to get Denzel all for himself!

 

DJ AX

THIRTY SECONDS!

 

Denzel boots Sandman in the gut, then lunges at him, but gets clotheslined by the bar.

 

DJ AX

FIFTEEN SECONDS!

 

Sandman grabs Denzel and moves towards the concession stand.

 

DJ AX

TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE!

 

Sandman sends Denzel's head crashing into the glass case of arcade prizes! Denzel crumples to the ground, and Sandman covers...

 

1...

 

 

 

DX

ONE!

 

2...

 

 

The horn blows as the referee slaps the ground a second time!

 

COLE

The match is over!

 

COACH

Sandman wins!

 

COLE

No, I don't think there was a three-count there!

 

Sandman raises his arms in the air, but the referee waves it off, saying that time expired.

 

COLE

There it is!

 

DJ AX

Ladies and gentlemen, the match is over! The winner, and STILL OAOAST Heartland champion, DENZEL SPENCER!

 

COACH

What a travesty! A slow count by the referee!

 

COLE

Denzel Spencer retains his Heartland title in the Skate of Die match!

 

Denzel is helped up by the referees, and walks through the exit with his belt.

 

COACH

Well, I'll tell you what. He may have been saved by the bell tonight, but there'll be another time for Sandman9000!

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NRsswomens.jpg

 

Now I’m that BITCH!

Now I’m that BITCH!

Now I’m that BITCH!

Now I’m that BITCH!

 

Livvi Franc’s “Now I’m that bitch” instantly switches to Another Body Murdered by Faith No More.

 

Anger! Anger I tells ya! That’s the precise emotion that welcomes team captain Holly into the ring. Wearing a plaid mini skirt, and a cut-off to the chest black mesh top over a red bikini top, Holly cuts a pretty but fearsome image. She snarls at the camera, almost knocking the poor videographer over on her way to the ramp.

 

BUFFER

The following is a ten woman survivor series match! Now making her way to the ring, from Sin City, Nevada, she is THE ANGEL OF DEATH HOLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYY!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

Red spotlights flicker in the background, as Holly stomps down the ramp, cursing out everyone she lays eyes on. She slides into the ring, popping to her feet with a nasty glare at the referee. Holly then leans against the ring ropes, looking out at the masses and chiding every last one of them for booing her.

 

COACH

Josie’s put a lot of faith in Holly, and Holly’s gotta put a lot of faith in her team. I ain’t so sure Holly is that trusting, though.

 

COLE

They're going to have to come through as a group because Holly can't do this five on one.

 

Cue: “Renegade” by Jay-Z and Eminem

 

Melissa Nerdly struts on stage in an 80’s throwback exercise outfit, of purple tights, and red swimsuit style top. On the rear end of her tights Reject's Girl is scribbled in cursive lettering. She stretches out on the top of the ramp, hitting a few jumping jacks, before moseing down to ringside.

 

BUFFER

And her partner, from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, MELISSAAAAA NERDLYYYYYY!

 

COLE

The Nerdly family well represented here at November Reign in their home country of Canada.

 

Melissa gently steps into the ring where she feels the need to pose to a less than receptive audience. Seeing Melissa’s annoyance, Holly brow beats the fans for their lack of respect.

 

Things start to get a little wild thanks to Motley Crue’s “Wild Side”. The fans jeer and boo as the mighty Malaysia Nerdly makes her appearance on stage. She raises her arms into the air, while white lights swirl in a frantic pace all around her. The sadistic Nerdly comes bound in a leather corset and black denim pants. She laughs haughtily at the frightened crowd before making her to the ramp.

 

BUFFER

From Edmonton, Alberta Canada, she is the ultimate combination of Beauty and Beatdowns….SHE IS MALAYSIAAAAAA NERDDLLLLLLYYYYYY!

 

COLE

From one Deadly Alliance member to the next! Both looking to make their mark on the women’s dvision.

 

The former champion stands on the outside, cracking her whip and delighting in scaring the fans with it. Holly and Melissa keep their distance, because frankly Malaysia is a little worrisome!

 

Oasis’ Slide Away fires up bringing out the no nonsense Megan Skye. Less no non sense is her intricate tights. Black leather pants with the Cucaracha Internacional logo on the left thigh and a yellow line down the legs. Black leather top with a yellow one underneath, just visible around the arms and cleavage. Black elbowpads, black boots with yellow soles. She grumbles to herself about something no dobut relating to Landon, and heads to ringside.

 

BUFFER

And representing Cucaracha Internacional she is from Providence, Rhode Island, MEGAN SKYEEEEEEEE!

 

BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

Megan doesn’t much care for the crowd’s reaction, and instead goes straight to Holly to discuss strategy.

 

COACH

There’s a woman with a lot of plans, and a lot of clothes, lose some of that shizzzzz girl, keep it lookin good and skimpy!

 

M

 

O

 

N

 

E

 

Y

 

So sexy

 

Damn, I love the jam, the jet and the mansion. (Oh yeah)

And I enjoy the gifts and the trips to the islands.(Oh yeah)

Its good to live expensive

You know it, but my knees get weak intensive

When you give me k-kisses

 

Thats money honey,

Well I'm your lover and your mistress

Thats money honey

When you touch me, its so delicious

Thats money honey

Baby when you tell me the pieces

Thats money honey

 

COLE

Lorelei’s earning the big bucks tonight, this is her 3rd appearance on the show!

 

Lady Gaga's Money Honey rings out over the numerous boos from the arena crowd. Stepping onto the Angleslam set is Lorelei DeCenzo, wearing black booty shorts and a ruffled pink featherd top, twirls around to show off her impressive body before pointing to the ring. Nodding to herself she heads down the entrance ramp with nose firmly stuck in the air to avoid interaction with the audience.

 

BUFFER

She comes from Manhattan Beach, California, representing The Enterprise she is a former women's champion….THE MONEY HONEY LORELEI DECENZOOOOOO!

 

"BOOOOOOOOO!" the fans spit venom at Lorelei, who wags her fingers at them.

 

COLE

And here’s someone that knows Morgan all to well, no doubt an asset when teaming against her.

 

COACH

Or a liability if Morgan snaps on her.

 

Lorelei enters the ring, brushing aside her team in order to have the full ring to strike a beauteous pose in. Melissa scoffs at such actions, obviously considering herself to be the fairer of the two.

 

BUFFER

And the opponents…..

 

I MAKE THEM GOOD GIRLS GO BAD

I MAKE THEM GOOD GIRLS GO

GOOD GIRLS GO BAD!”

 

YEAAAAAAAAAA!

 

Bouncing out from backstage is film buff and NYU Art Student, Molly Nerdly. The self-proclaimed smartest of the bunch, wheels around through the entrance doors in a black leather jacket and a faux fur black micro skit. In a gesture similar to Halloween Spectacular, she smiles to the crowd as she rips away her jacket to reveal a triangle bikini top that shows plenty of skin!

 

COACH

Woah mama! What’s papa Nerdly got in them genes?

 

COLE

His penis.

 

COACH

His….wha….not those kind of jeans!

 

BUFFER

From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, she is the 2009 manager of the year, MOLLYYYYYY NERDLLLLYYYYYYY!

 

Molly frames up the gathered heels in the ring, and gives them a cold THUMBS DOWN! Needless to say this sets Holly off, and its only the oncoming entrance music that shields us from her profane tirade.

 

"Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy)

And you don’t care what they say

See, every time you turn around

They screamin' your name

 

Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy)

And you don’t care what they say

See, every time you turn around

They screamin' your name"

 

The lights flash purple and white when "When I Grow Up" by The Pussycat Dolls hits. Seconds later the dynamic cheerleading duo of Jade Rodez-Duncan and little sister Maya Duncan-Blanchard run onto the stage to a HUGE ovation! No boobs so less than Molly. Either way the girls fire up the rabid audience, while Molly claps for their arrival.

 

BUFFER

Residing in Los Angeles, California... the second generation starlet with a heart of gold... ladies and gentlemen, she is accompanied by Maya Duncan-Blanchard... "LITTLE MISS CALIFORNIA"... JJJJAAAAAAADDEEEEEE... RRRRROOOOODDEEEEEEZZZZZZ - DDUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAANN!!!!!

 

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"

 

COLE

Well, Morgan actually got Jade as a volunteer for this match up thanks to her sister Maya. It should be noted Maya got Alfdogg onto Team Alix as well. No extra credit for her social services classes at school, though.

 

"When I grow up

I wanna be famous

I wanna be a star

I wanna be in movies

 

When I grow up

I wanna see the world

Drive nice cars

I wanna have Groupies"

 

Molly gets a big hug from Jade as she reaches the ring apron. Maya continues working up the now standing and roaring audience, while also soliciting them to buy girl scout cookies. Gotta move those Thin Mints.

 

Fallout Boy's cover of "Beat It" powers through the arena and out comes the queen of Geekdom, Melody Nerdly! Multi-coloured strobe lights freak out around her as she strikes a Matrix style pose, befitting of her Matrix style all leather outfit. With seizures caused around the world by her far out light display, Melody makes her way to the ring with a skip in her step.

 

BUFFER

This contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, the challenger. Eminating from the Fortress Of Nerdlytude... she is "PLAYER ONE"... MMMMEEEEELLLLLLLLLLOOOOODDYYYYYYY... NNEEEEEERRRRRRRDDLLLLLLYYYYYYYYY!!!

 

"YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

Melody catches up with her teammates and proceeds to offer them advice in the form of Yoda quotes. Oddly enough, Jade seems to seriously consider each piece of Star Wars knowledge.

 

:CUE:

 

Sophie comes onto the stage waving and greeting the cheering audience as red and blue lights flash behind her. She wears a white tank top with her name etched on the back, black workout pants, and white tennis shoes that carry her down the entrance ramp. The French girl is all smiles as she shakes hands, and high fives the front row OAOAST Marks.

 

BUFFER

She comes from Marseilles, France, she is SOPHIE GREEEEEYYYYYY!

 

Sophie jogs to the rest of her team, and exchanges kisses on the cheeks. Because that’s what the French do, see? A male fan tries to get in the action but he’s warded off by Melody’s Hadoken.

 

The dizzyingly frantic symbols and the ripping adrenaline of

flow into the arena like a volcanic eruption.

 

“OHHHHHHHHHH!” the fans murmur, knowing full well the danger that lies behind the entrance doors

 

GO!

 

To un-explain the unforgivable,

Drain all the blood and give the kids a show.

By streetlight this dark night,

A séance down below.

There are things that I have done,

You never should ever know!

 

And without you is how I disappear,

And live my life alone forever now.

And without you is how I disappear,

And live my life alone forever now.

 

Bolts of electricity crash down like bombs onto the stage, exploding into blinding sparks. All across the arena, video screens are filled with the image of flickering electricity. The stage lies carpeted by a serene yet evil blue light. The most powerful burst of electricity scorches through the air and touches down in the middle of the stage. That’s when the youthful challenger first appears on stage, earning an intimidated reaction from the frightened crowd. Morgan wears a pinstriped booty shorted romper over her tiny frame. She chews on her blond hair nervously, and watches the crowd with the same frightened look they give her. There is however a noticeable section of the teenage crowd greeting Morgan with cheers. Angsty teenagers>>>>*

 

BUFFER

From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada... she THE OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION!! Prepare for SHOCK and awe from MMMOOOOOOORRRRRGGAAAAAAANN... NNEEEERRRRRDDLLLLLYYYYYYYY!!!

 

Can you hear me cry out to you?

Words I thought I'd choke on figure out.

I'm really not so with you anymore.

I'm just a ghost,

So I can't hurt you anymore,

So I can't hurt you anymore.

 

And now, you wanna see how far down I can sink?

Let me go, fuck!

So, you can, well now so, you can

I'm so far away from you.

Well now so, you can.

 

Morgan gets into the ring and stands on the first rope, while leaning over the third. She casts a quizzical glance at the audience, almost childlike in its odd innocence.

 

COACH

She didn’t even glance once at her team. Not once. Everyone is buddy and she totally ignores them.

 

COLE

Well, Morgan does have a hard time trusting people. She’s not going to suddenly change over night.

 

COACH

No its that these girls can’t be trusted, one’s French and a coward, another spends her days locked in a cavern playing dungeons and dragons with pokemon dolls, they’re all untrustworthy except for Molly because she’ll flash you and that’s hot!

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*DINGDINGDING*

 

The teams quickly decide on who's going to start. Megan Skye for Holly's team and Sophie for Team Morgan, cheered on by all her team-mates, except Morgan who stands withdrawn from the rest staring at the ringmat.

 

COLE

An awkward position for Sophie to be in, teaming with the girl who took her Women's Title, Morgan, fighting against the team her cousin Josie Baker has backed.

 

COACH

L'problem.

 

Sophie and Megan lock up and Sophie applies a headlock, to cheers from her team. But Megan quickly performs a legsweep and Sophie faceplants into the mat, which quietens them down. Sophie checks her face for damage as Megan stomps the back. Picking Sophie up, Megan tests the face again, with a forearm smash. Sophie falls against the ropes and Megan's team-mates are now the more vocal as she stomps the French girl down.

 

COLE

Megan Skye taking no nonsense here tonight. I suppose she takes enough of it out of the ring, having to deal with Landon, so why do it here?

 

Irish whip sends Sophie for the ride, but she ducks a clothesline and responds with a crossbody block...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Sophie reaches her hand forward and tries to make it to her corner, but is cut short with a kick to the ribs. She falls to her knees and Megan delivers a shot to the back, before dragging Sophie across and tagging in Lorelei.

 

COLE

In comes Lorelei, with her opponent compromised, of course.

 

Stomps in the corner earn a warning from the referee and earn the referee a cold glare as Lorelei is forced to bring Sophie out into the ring. Snap suplex and a cover...

 

 

1...

 

 

2..

 

 

No.

 

Lorelei drops a knee to Sophie's midsection and reaches out, tagging Holly in. The crowd boo as The Angel Of Death steps in and steps her black combat boot into Sophie's ribs. Morgan continues to shy away from everything around her and makes no eye contact with Holly, who scoops up Sophie and slams her to the mat. With a scowl on her face Holly backs up and glances Morgan's way as she comes off the ropes. But that momentary distraction costs her, as Sophie rolls out of the way of an elbowdrop.

 

"YAAAAAAAAAAY!"

 

Quickly across to her corner, Sophie tags to Melody.

 

COACH

Oh, this geek.

 

Powerbar fully charged, Melody comes in a ball of energy. She throws a dropkick, sending Holly head over heels. Holly walks right into a second dropkick. And then a third. Melody lies in wait for Holly to get back up again, hand shaking with anticipation, ready to deliver the JUDO CHOP...

 

 

...and Holly just stands there and gives Melody a funny look. So Melody quickly goes low with a drop toehold and oklahoma rolls Holly up instead...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Holly grumbles to herself as she gets back to her feet, getting frustrated with the speed of Melody. A lunge and grab fails, Melody ducking low and evading. And this time she throws the dreaded JUDO CHOP, bonking Holly right on the top of the head! After a couple of seconds of mild discomfort, Holly realises she's not really that hurt and angrily kicks Melody in the gut, putting her on her BUTT.

 

COLE

I think that chop just annoyed Holly.

 

COACH

Can you blame her? She's dealing with a nerd. Treat her like one.

 

With Melody left winded and surprised a tag is made, to sister Melissa. Reject's girl smiles from ear to ear as she steps in and starts kicking away at her nerdy Nerdly sibling. Grabbing her by the hair, Melissa throws Melody's face the mat, then turns to pose to the camera.

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

Melissa picks Melody up and buries a knee to the gut from a clinch. And another. An irish whip then sends Melody off for a back elbow and another batch of posing. All smiles, she shadow-boxes, waiting for Melody to get back up so she can start teeing off. Safe to say Melissa is better at boxing shadows than people though. Her first punch is ducked and she's struck in the face with a Standing Yakuza Kick!

 

COLE

Ooh, right to face! That might stop Melissa's preening and posing.

 

COACH

That ain't no ordinary face either Michael. That face belongs to the World Champ. He owns that face. So that ain't cool.

 

Tag is made and Molly Nerdly is already halfway to the top rope, ready to fly down onto Melissa with a big Crossbody Block!!

 

COLE

Molly taking flight! And Melissa with more than her face to worry about!

 

Completely left reeling by this sudden turnaround, Melissa staggers back to her feet. Molly is waiting with a boot to the gut, before turning her sister over and dishing out the Final Cut (Pro 2)!!

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!

 

"YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!"

 

COACH

What!?

 

COLE

Say goodnight Melissa, time to go back and get the Champ ready. Or look at yourself in the mirror for a couple of hours.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Melissa Nerdly

Eliminated by: Molly Nerdly

TEAM MORGAN 5 TEAM HOLLY 4

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Holly and Lorelei are left holding their hands on their heads, while Megan reacts a little quicker and jumps Molly from behind.

 

COLE

Well that's an earlier disadvantage for Team Holly, now one girl down.

 

COACH

That's okay, plenty of time to recover.

 

Megan clubs away on Molly before looking for an irish whip. Molly is able to reverse the whip and guides Megan into one of the neutral corners. However, she misses with a charge and her controversial Boxoffice Bust crashes into the turnbuckles. Megan turns her around in the corner and starts to go to work, attacking Molly's midsection with a series of middle kicks.

 

COLE

There's that kickboxing offence of Megan. Those feet, very proficient.

 

COACH

Yeah and they're pretty effective too.

 

COLE

.....

 

With Molly hurt, Lorelei is eager to come back in and gets her wish. Lining up Molly in the corner she charges and puts her rear-end to good use with a running BUTT smash, crushing Molly against the lower turnbuckles.

 

COLE

No love lost between Molly and Lorelei, former allies within The Enterprise until the big fallout with Ned Blanchard and Theodore Moneymaker.

 

COACH

No love lost between Lorelei and anyone on Morgan's team. Not me though. I got plenty o'love for her. One day....

 

After dishing out a double axehandle to Molly's back, Lorelei walks over to her opponents' corner and taunts them by throwing a roll of twenty dollar bills from off of her ring attire! Throwing the money at them doesn't prove much of an insult though. Especially when Maya reaches into the ring and snaps up all the bills in astonishingly quick time. A costly insult is then added to as Lorelei is then flung face-first into the corner by a smart move from Molly.

 

COACH

What's with all the abuse to the faces here!? Lay off a little, girls!

 

Tag is made and Jade comes in for the first time, to a hearty cheer. She goes to work on Lorelei with forearm shots in the corner before bringing her out with a big running Bulldog!!

 

JADE

WHAT'S UP TORONTO!?

 

"YYYYYAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY!!"

 

Maya briefly glances up and shrugs.

 

MAYA

That was probably lame. But, I don't give a hoot, I'm already up 140 bucks!

 

Trying to weasel her way out of the ring Lorelei tries to cut a deal and suggest she and Jade should both make a friendly, unrestricted tag to someone else. But she gets a big NO DEAL and popped in the face with a left hand! Jade then paws her with an open right. With a guttural shout, Jade then pulls a 360 and knocks Lorelei down with a big clothesline!

 

COLE

And Jade is ROLLING~!

 

Lorelei tries to get to her corner but has her foot caught by Jade. However, a firm kick with the free leg catches Jade right in the breadbasket and she's forced to let Lorelei go, allowing a tag to Megan. Skye comes in and goes right for the kill, aiming high with the CHICK KICK... but Jade ducks and catches Megan on the way back around with a front dropkick to the chest!

 

COACH

Her head was nearly rolling there, rolling back up the aisle.

 

COLE

But Jade managed to avoid the kick and now back in comes Melody.

 

A little too eager to come in, Melody is forced to check her run. And by the time she's 360'd back around, Megan is waiting and hangs Melody across the top rope with a hotshot!

 

COLE

The momentum is shifting back and forth in this one. A real rollercoaster ride for the team captains, or so you'd think, but I'm not even sure Morgan has looked up once since this match started.

 

Megan grabs hold of Melody by the hair and takes her over to a corner. Hopping to the middle rope, Skye sets up for a Tornado DDT. But Melody fights out. Breaking free of Megan's facelock, she takes a step back and unleashes a thunderous SHORYUKEN, causing nerds and geeks around the world to wet themselves with sheer joy! Coincidentally, some of whom sit in this wrestling audience.

 

"YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

 

Knocked silly Megan slumps forward and falls off the ropes, right onto Melody's shoulders. Melody carries Megan to the middle of the ring and delivers a big TKO, then rolls on top...

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

"YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!"

 

COLE

And just like that, Team Holly are down by two! And Holly cannot believe her eyes!

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Megan Skye

Eliminated by: Melody Nerdly

TEAM MORGAN 5 TEAM HOLLY 3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

As Megan is rolled out of the ring, Holly is left with just Lorelei and Malaysia for company and berates her latest beaten team-mate. For the first time in virtually the whole match, Morgan glances up and looks around to see her 'team' with the numbers advantage, almost enough to bring her out of her shell.

 

COLE

This is not going the way Holly was expected. Or, I'm sure, the way Josie Baker was expecting. A five to three deficit!

 

COACH

If there's one consolation for Holly though, it's that one of those three is Malaysia and she almost counts for two by herself.

 

Having had enough of this crap Holly steps into the ring with a purpose, trying to lead by example. She goes right on the attack on Melody, who is quickly overwhelmed, but manages to fight her way out from Holly's flying fists. Running away to create some distance, she lures Holly in and evades her again, getting across to tag Jade.

 

COLE

And Morgan's team making plenty of quick tags, except to Morgan herself.

 

Jade beats Holly to the punch as she comes in and fends Holly off with forearms before she hits the ropes. Able to duck a clothesline, Jade knocks Holly down with a thesz press...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No.

 

Rolled off of Holly, Jade quickly picks herself up and dishes out an open left hand. And then an open right. Before Jade can go for the spinning clothesline though Holly reaches out and rakes Jade's eyes!

 

COLE

Holly getting desperate.

 

COACH

Are you kidding? She'd rake the eyes of a corpse if she thought it would hurt.

 

With Jade momentarily blinded Holly tries to charge at her, only to be blocked off with an elbow. With enough vision left to tag Jade gets over to bring Sophie into the match. The French girl waits for Holly to charge in again and navigates around it, into a schoolgirl...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Holly goes to grab Sophie's hair, but is tripped up and rolled back onto her shoulders...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

COACH

Man, Holly needs to watch herself. If she gets pinned and it's 5 on 2, that ain't gonna go down well with the boss-girl.

 

Tumbling over with Holly, Sophie scrambles back to her feet as well. The French girl ducks a wild clothesline and reaches up, hooking Holly with a neckbreaker! Lorelei despairs from the outside, as Sophie comes off the ropes and follows up with a Big Splash...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

Kickout!

 

As Holly gets back up Sophie tries to take control and grabs a side headlock. She's turned away from her corner though and thrown to the ropes. Sophie tries to make lemonade out of citrons, preparing to throw a clothesline. But Holly cuts Sophie off with a well-placed boot. Holly then takes a step to the side and SLAMS her combat boot into the side of Sophie's head!

 

COLE

Ooh!

 

COACH

Dayyum!

 

Sophie looks shocked to have been hit so hard and holds her ear in pain. Hauling Sophie right back up, Holly takes aim, flinging the French girl hard into the turnbuckles. As she staggers out, Sophie then suffers another kick to the gut and is given a dose of PERCUSSION to her already ringing head!

 

COLE

That's going to do it for Sophie, I'm afraid.

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!

 

COACH

That oughta even things up a little bit.

 

COLE

That kick to the head was just too much to recover from. Sophie's bell was well and truly rung.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Sophie

Eliminated by: Holly

TEAM MORGAN 4 TEAM HOLLY 3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

As Sophie rolls outside into friendly arms, Jade comes in to replace her and lays into Holly with some forearm shots. Holly cuts Jade off with a knee to the gut, then rears back and delivers one hard right hand to drop Little Miss California. She then tags in Lorelei, who quickly sends Jade off the ropes. Jade ducks underneath a clothesline though, waiting for Lorelei to turn around and delivering the Sweet Dreams! Cover...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

Kickout!

 

Jade looks over to her corner and points to Morgan, asking the crowd if they want to see her in.

 

COLE

Looks like we might see the team captain in for the first time... or, maybe not.

 

Continuing to shy away from any contact with her team Morgan hangs her head and sadly shakes it, not wanting to come in. Jade asks the crowd to make a little more noise, hoping that will help. And Maya tries to convince Morgan from the outside.

 

COACH

Come on, if the girl doesn't want in, she don't want in. Leave her alone.

 

COLE

They're just trying to include Morgan in the match, what's so wrong about that?

 

COACH

They want her to get beat so she won't turn around and zap them, that's what they want.

 

COLE

I don't think so.

 

Finally, after much coaxing, Morgan meekly reaches out her hand and makes the tag. And some of the crowd cheer, which takes her a little off-guard. Jade holds Lorelei in place, a look of fear on the Money Honey's face as Morgan walks in and gives her a boot in the ribs.

 

COLE

Teamwork from Morgan and Jade!

 

Lorelei shuffles back into a corner and tries to beg off from Morgan. Her pleas of "WE'RE STILL FRIENDS" fall on deaf ears though and she's dragged to her feet...

 

 

*SLAP!*

 

"WHOOOOOOOO!"

 

...for a knifedge strike to the chest!

 

 

*SLAP!*

 

"WHOOOOOOOO!"

 

And another. Her assets stinging, Lorelei reaches out and shoves Morgan away. It's only when Morgan picks herself back up when Lorelei realises what she's done, seeing the look on the Women's Champion's face. And before Lorelei even has a chance to beg off Morgan unleashes with a Lightning Kick, repeatedly kicking Lorelei in the corner.

 

COLE

And Morgan, unleashing her fury on Lorelei! Couldn't happen to a nicer person!

 

COACH

What are you talking about? Lorelei gave Morgan everything she ever wanted. Love, loyalty, safety, money. And this is how you get repaid?

 

Once Lorelei is beaten down sufficiently, Morgan whips her former "friend" out of the corner. Lorelei gets her foot up on the turnbuckle to stop another collision, then sticks out an elbow to nail Morgan coming in. A bodyslam puts Morgan down and suddenly a vengeful look comes over Lorelei's face. She smiles an evil smile, grabbing Morgan's wrist and dragging her over. Lorelei then looks up at Malaysia... but as she goes to tag her, Holly intercepts the tag and comes in instead.

 

COACH

Uh-oh, Holly wants in and she wants a piece of Morgan!

 

Holly goes right to work with her heavy boots, stomping the tiny frame of the Women's Champion repeatedly. Poor Morgan is rocked with every stomp and she tries to cover up, as the referee moves in to get Holly to back up. The ref manages to keep Holly at bay long enough for Morgan to pick herself up, letting out a SCREAM of rage and DIVING onto Holly with a wild frenzy of slaps and scratches!!!

 

"YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"

 

COACH

SHIT JUST GOT REAL!

 

Ripping and clawing at each other Holly and Morgan roll around on the mat, as everyone else looks on helplessly. Lorelei steps in ready to break the fight up, as does Jade, cancelling each other out while Morgan and Holly roll underneath the bottom rope and land in a heap on the arena floor... and then keep fighting some more!!

 

COLE

These two are GOING AT IT! I don't think there's enough people in this building to pull Morgan and Holly apart!

 

COACH

They might have to wait until one of them has ripped the other's flesh off and they're just dealing with a carcass!

 

As the fight continues, the referee stands over the ropes, helplessly to do anything except count. Morgan and Holly pay absolutely no attention to that, too busy trying to claw each other's eyes out and choke each other unconscious. And it doesn't take long for the referee to reach ten (roughly ten seconds, as luck would have it!) and signal to the outside.

 

COLE

I tell you what, if OAOAST officials sign these two to another one on one match, we may never have seen a fight like it! These two aren't trying to beat each other. They're trying to HARM each other!

 

Referees pile out from the back and the action in the ring has stopped, everybody transfixed on this war unfolding in front of them. It takes at least 8 people to pull Holly and Morgan apart. 8 brave men, Holly and Morgan kicking and lashing out in an attempt to get at each other again.

 

"LET THEM FIGHT!"

"LET THEM FIGHT!"

"LET THEM FIGHT!"

"LET THEM FIGHT!"

 

COACH

No, don't let them fight! They're gonna rip each other to shreds!

 

Morgan starts throwing a fit, clearly not happy with being manhandled by four referees telling her to calm down. And as she starts to freak out, Maya rushes over to try and help out, seeing Morgan in distress. Maya's way seems to work a little better than the referees. But all of a sudden, Holly breaks free of the referees restraining her and BOOTS Morgan right in the head, sending her flying back against the barricade!!!!

 

"OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"

 

COLE

Oh, what a cheapshot! What a cheapshot!

 

Morgan lays hurt on the floor as Holly is restrained again and dragged away by the referees. A camera follows her up the ramp, which even on PPV is a bad idea and sends the bleep button into overdrive.

 

COLE

We apologise for those comments by Holly... uhm, all of them. I think we've finally got some order restored here but at the cost of Morgan being hit with a vicious kick, which she didn't even see coming.

 

BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen, the referee has ruled that both Holly and Morgan Nerdly have been COUNTED OUT!

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Morgan Nerdly and Holly

Eliminated by: Double CO

TEAM MORGAN 3 TEAM HOLLY 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

The remaining referees and Maya try to tend to Morgan and help her to the back, Holly now hauled off and out of earshot. Thankfully.

 

COLE

So that's both team captains gone. And what are we left with... we've got Melody, Molly and Jade on one side. And on the other, Lorelei DeCenzo and Malaysia, who has yet to tag in during this entire match. Don't expect that to last long.

 

As the two remaining teams regroup, Melody steps in for her team. Lorelei assumes leadership with Holly gone and she tries to motivate Malaysia, before sending her into the ring.

 

COACH

What a gracious woman, finally letting Malaysia have her turn in the ring. Unselfish to a fault, Lorelei DeCenzo.

 

COLE

That's one way of looking at it. If you're an idiot.

 

Malaysia squares up to her nerdiest sister and dares her to take a free shot. Melody knows too much about her sister to fall for that though and dodges behind, trying to put Malaysia out with a sleeper hold. Hands on hips, Malaysia doesn't seem concerned and reaches up, dumping Melody over to the mat. Dusting herself off, Melody moves in again, but gets grabbed by the throat! Melody bats at Malaysia's arm, trying to break her grip. A firm shove sends The Game Genie stumbling back against the ropes, bouncing her back into an equally firm boot to the chest!

 

COLE

There has never been a competitor in the women's division so physically dominant as Malaysia. You think of all the success Krista and Alix have had against the male competitors, but a lot of that success comes from technique and strategy. Malaysia is an absolute powerhouse!

 

Picking Melody back up, Malaysia rears back and brings a booming forearm down across the back. Another hard forearm leaves Melody wincing in pain. Thrown to the ropes, Melody ducks under a clothesline though, coming back with a flying body tackle. Clumsy and not very elegant, it doesn't do much but stagger Malaysia. Melody tries again, with the same result. So she hits the ropes a third time and catches Malaysia in a sunset flip...

 

 

1...

 

 

2...

 

 

No!

 

Melody stomps on Malaysia as she gets back up, not doing enough to keep her down. Hitting the ropes again Melody looks to dish out some Nerdly Revenge, going for the Wheelbarrow Bulldog...

 

 

 

...but Malaysia shoves Melody down, face-first into the mat!

 

"OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

COACH

Like she was nothin'!

 

Grabbing onto Melody's feet before they fall out of reach, Malaysia quickly steps through and applies the Inverted Boston Crab!! Melody thinks about crawling for the ropes, but not for long, before tapping out!

 

COACH

One down.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Melody Nerdly

Eliminated by: Malaysia Nerdly

TEAM MORGAN 2 TEAM HOLLY 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Molly jumps Malaysia as soon as she lets Melody go, but does little better in inflicting damage on big sister. In no mood for taking shit, Malaysia grabs Molly and takes her over to a corner, then starts driving shoulders into the ribs.

 

COACH

Like. She. Was. Nothin'!

 

COLE

Malaysia is taking the fight to her sisters. There's no such thing as a handicap match in her mind. And now the sides have been evened up.

 

After working Molly over with the shoulders, Malaysia whips her across the ring and delivers a crushing Avalanche!!

 

"OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

 

COLE

And look at the big smile on Lorelei's face.

 

COACH

Even money couldn't buy a better partner.

 

Molly falls to her knees gasping for air. Hanging her sister over the rope, Malaysia chokes her against the middle rope with a sinister smile on her face.

 

"ONE!"

"TWO!"

"THREE!"

"FOUR!"

 

Malaysia lets go of Molly, only to place her head the other side of the ropes and pull back on the hair this time!

 

"ONE!"

"TWO!"

"THREE!"

"FOUR!"

 

COACH

Just like the good ol' days up the road in Edmonton at the Nerdly compound.

 

COLE

House.

 

COACH

Same thing.

 

Dragging Molly back up, Malaysia sends her away to arm's length, then drags her back into a forearm shot. Molly falls to her knees again. Malaysia decides to inflict some more pain by pulling back on the hair again, then breaking the count by throwing Molly face-first into the mat. Over in the corner Jade and Maya do their best to encourage Molly, but it's clear she's completely at her sister's mercy. Especially when her neck is stepped on and she's left trapped in place, unable to escape.

 

COLE

This doesn't look good at all for Molly. Or for Jade.

 

Picked back up, Molly is scooped up into Malaysia's arms with ease. And then thrown with even more ease, right across the ring with a Fallaway Slam!

 

JADE

COME ON MOLLY! YOU CAN DO IT!

 

MAYA

SAVE YOURSELF! RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN!

 

JADE

:huh:

 

MAYA

Sorry, gotta stay on message, huh?

 

Malaysia waits for Molly to pick herself back up and charges at her, aiming with a hard Yakuza kick to the chest... but Molly sidesteps and goes for a backslide!

 

COLE

Look at this, a counter!

 

COACH

No way. No way.

 

No way is right, Molly without the strength to pull Malaysia down. And what was a nice idea turns out to be the beginning of the end, as Malaysia turns around and grabs Molly in a gutwrench. Jade watches on, fearful for her team-mate, knowing exactly how it feels to suffer the CANADIAN BACKBREAKER PILEDRIVER!!!!

 

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

 

COACH

Bye bye boobies.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Molly Nerdly

Eliminated by: Malaysia Nerdly

TEAM MORGAN 1 TEAM HOLLY 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

With Molly thrown aside Malaysia looks over to the last girl standing on the opposition. Trepidation would be a good way to describe Jade's mood at this point, despite the support of the Toronto crowd starting up. Lorelei leans over the ropes and pats Malaysia on the back for a job well done, a big smile on her face.

 

COLE

And what a position this leaves Jade in.

 

COACH

Her only hope is to turn tail and run. No lie. Malaysia is just slayin' girls. And if that weren't bad enough, she's got someone just as dominant waiting on the apron to be tagged and do the same!

 

COLE

Are you kidding me?

 

Jade slowly climbs into the ring and squares up with Malaysia, no stranger to the most dominant Nerdly of the bunch. Malaysia smiles down at Jade and remarks "long time, no see", about as unnervingly as is humanly possible. But Jade doesn't back down and unloads with forearms shots! Getting about four in, Jade has the presence of mind to duck underneath a swing from Malaysia and catch her with another four or five quick strikes.

 

COLE

Jade has found the formula to beat Malaysia in the past. Hit and run, try and keep this mighty woman on her toes.

 

Failing, Jade is suddenly on her toes, thanks to Malaysia gripping the top of her cheerleader costume and nearly lifting her feet off the mat. A careless shove sends Jade tumbling back into a corner. But as Malaysia charges, Jade dodges out of the way and Malaysia hits the turnbuckles. Jumping up, Jade pins Malaysia in...

 

 

"ONE!"

 

"TWO!"

 

"THREE!"

 

"FOUR!"

 

"FIVE!"

 

"SIX!"

 

"SEVEN!"

 

"EIGHT!"

 

 

...and no more, Malaysia suddenly lifting Jade up off the ropes and holding her by the throat!

 

COLE

Uh-oh!

 

Malaysia leaves Jade hanging for a few seconds before dropping her the considerable distance to the mat. The back of Jade's head bounces off the mat and Malaysia places her foot on her body...

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

Kickout!

 

Jade slowly crawls to the ropes, needing their help to get to her feet. Stalking right behind, Malaysia waits for Jade to reach out, then stands on her hand!

 

COLE

Malaysia is startig to enjoy herself. In that sick, twisted way of her's.

 

Pulled back to her feet, Jade is struck in the chest with a forearm and crumbles to the mat.

 

"LET'S GO JADE!"

"LET'S GO JADE!"

"LET'S GO JADE!"

"LET'S GO JADE!"

 

Maya plays cheerleader, realising her sister needs some help. All the fans in the world joining hands and spelling out Jade's name with multi-coloured flashlights probably wouldn't do much good against Malaysia though. She tries to fight back, punching Malaysia in the breadbasket. Malaysia just shrugs the shots off though, clubbing Jade in the back to snuff her out. Reaching down, Malaysia then scoops Jade up and delivers a big Side Slam!

 

LORELEI

MALAYSIA! TAG! TAG ME IN!

 

Not used to get orders, outside of foreplay at least, Malaysia looks at Lorelei with some curiousity as she demands the tag. So Lorelei takes it upon herself and pats her partner on the shoulder.

 

COLE

I guess Lorelei's satisfied that Malaysia's done the work. And now she wants the glory.

 

COACH

Well that's cool. Malaysia enjoys doing the work more than she would the glory anyway.

 

Lorelei picks up right away, putting the boots to the defenceless Jade to the disgust of the crowd. Revelling in it Lori gives the "money fingers" to the crowd as she picks Jade up.

 

COACH

Looking good, Lori!

 

After a couple of blows across the back Lorelei loads Jade up, whipping her to the ropes. Lorelei attempts a back elbow, but Jade ducks underneath and gets ready to throw a big forearm. However, Lorelei catches her. Jade elbows her way out of the uranage attempt, only for Lorelei to grab hold of the hair and tug Little Miss California down to the mat by it. Boos rain down on The Money Honey as she hooks Jade up, a smirk on her face. Hooking the leg, she takes Jade up, looking for the Cash Flow... BUT JADE COUNTERS WITH AN INSIDE CRADLE...

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!!!

 

"YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

LORELEI

:o

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Lorelei DeCenzo

Eliminated by: Jade Rodez-Duncan

TEAM MORGAN 1 TEAM HOLLY 1

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Lorelei looks stunned and hounds the referee, refusing to believe what happened.

 

COLE

A lapse of concentration from Lorelei and she is gone! What a move from Jade! And we're down to one on one!

 

Rubbing Lorelei's face in defeat, the wacky dance of Maya Duncan-Blanchard just makes the loss all the harder for Lorelei to bare. She finally leaves the ring, bitching out people in the crowd as they wave her goodbye.

 

COLE

Looks like The Money Honey finally got too greedy.

 

COACH

Oh you're just bringing the laughs tonight, aren't you? BOOOOOO! You suck! This is horrible.

 

With Lorelei gone, Jade drags herself to the ropes. Weary and winded, she hangs against the ropes, watching on disheartened as she sees Malaysia stepping back into the ring to face her again. Malaysia doesn't look concerned about being left on her own. Far from it. She smiles and waves for Jade to get back to her feet.

 

"LET'S GO JADE!"

"LET'S GO JADE!"

"LET'S GO JADE!"

"LET'S GO JADE!"

 

Determined not to let anyone down Jade picks herself up and squares up to Malaysia one more time.

 

COLE

After all the battles these two had last year, this is what it comes down to tonight. Jade and Malaysia.

 

Once she's summouned up some energy, Jade prepares to throw the first shot, but Malaysia beats her to it by grabbing her around the throat! Jade fights and struggles but Malaysia backs her across the ring, into a corner. The referee gives Malaysia a five count and she breaks on four, to throw a big forearm... but Jade dodges out of the way. Right hands start flying as Jade tries to take advantage of this opportunity, wailing away on Malaysia. Jade then tries an irish whip. But Malaysia doesn't budge.

 

COLE

Uh-oh. No go!

 

Jade's eyes widen as Malaysia pulls her back in and throws a short clothesline. Jade avoids it though. Finding herself in the corner, Jade quickly kicks up off the turnbuckles, thrusting her boots into the chest of Malaysia. Malaysia staggers back as Jade hops to the middle rope. After an appeal to the crowd Jade then leaps forward, hooking Malaysia for what looks like a swinging DDT... but Malaysia CATCHES Jade! Stopping short of being DDTed, Malaysia lifts Jade back up on her shoulder and drops her over her head with ease!

 

COLE

What a show of power, just deadlifting Jade and backdropping her like she was nothing. Freakish.

 

COACH

Oh, she's a freak alright.

 

COLE

I didn't mean in that way.

 

COACH

She's a freak in many ways.

 

As Jade picks herself up, Malaysia lays in wait. Off the ropes she delivers a running boot to the chest and covers...

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

No!

 

Malaysia smirks to herself as she leads Jade back to her feet. Slipping behind she applies a rear naked choke and watches as Jade struggles for every breath. Jade tries to fight the hold and quickly sinks to her knees, being choked out.

 

COLE

Look at that sick smile on the face of Malaysia. Jade is going out and she knows it.

 

COACH

I don't think that's what she's smiling about Mikey. She's smiling about what she's going to do once Jade's defenceless!

 

Hitting the ring mat in a desperate attempt to keep her sister awake Maya looks on, concerned. Jade hears this and tries to fight back. She manages to get a hand in between her throat and Malaysia's arm, aleviating a bit of the pressure and allowing her to get back to one knee. But Malaysia just lets her go. And as Jade regains much needed breath, Malaysia comes off the ropes again. Jade stands back up, just as Malaysia aims another boot at the chest...

 

 

...but Jade sidesteps! Leaping onto Malaysia's back she tries a sleeper hold of her own, but Malaysia is too strong and backs Jade into the turnbuckles. Jade lets go of the sleeper, but doesn't let Malaysia go, moving up onto her shoulders and taking her down with a Victory Roll!!

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

NO!

 

COLE

Couldn't hold Malaysia down. A good idea though. It may take a quick pin or roll-up to win this.

 

Jade gets up on the ropes again and looks to the crowd for some more support, as she takes off...

 

 

...and gets CAUGHT again! Malaysia smiles and then throws Jade back over her head with a Fallaway Slam, as Maya gives a resigned shake of the head.

 

COLE

That, however, was not such a good idea.

 

Stalking over to where Jade landed, Malaysia licks her lips. Dragging Jade back up she takes her time, slowly and deliberately hooking Jade in a gutwrench position. Malaysia then hoists Jade up over her shoulder... and Jade, realising she's in a bad place, starts to fight. Able to squirm free Jade manages to slip free and land on her feet behind Malaysia, to the relief of the crowd. As Malaysia turns around, Jade lands a forearm. And another. Neither with much behind them.

 

COLE

Jade not giving up here, she's giving everything she has.

 

COACH

And even that's not enough.

 

With a kick to the gut, Jade doubles Malaysia over and leaps over top, looking for a sunset flip. Malaysia stands firm though and reaches down, picking Jade back up by the throat! Jade breaks free, going to the midsection with another kick.

 

COLE

Malaysia just can't seem to put Jade away here!

 

Jade tries to whip Malaysia into a corner, but it's reversed. There's still enough left in Little Miss California to make one more leap to the ropes, landing on the middle ready to counter-attack. But Malaysia closes her down. And suddenly, fear hits Jade, as she's caught on the ropes. Malaysia reaches up and pulls Jade down onto her shoulder, carrying her away from the corner and DRIVING her down into the mat with the Piledriver!!!

 

"OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

COACH

Well, that oughta put her away.

 

Malaysia sits for a second, smiling sinisterly, before turning Jade over...

 

 

1...

 

 

 

2...

 

 

 

3!!!

 

*DINGDINGDING!*

 

The crowd give a dejected boo, a boo that was already resigned to defeat. Maya hangs her head on the apron as Malaysia hovers over Jade, still grinning.

 

BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen, your winner and SOLE SURVIVOR... MALAYSIA NEEEERRDDLLLYYYYYY!!!!

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eliminated: Jade Rodez-Duncan

Eliminated by: Malaysia Nerdly

SOLE SURVIVOR: MALAYSIA NERDLY

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

Malaysia stands over Jade, the referee hesitant to even raise her hand in victory for fear of what she might do.

 

COLE

The battle began with Holly and Morgan, looking to get the upper hand over the other. But in the end, it's the dominance of Malaysia that is the story. She may not be much of a team player, but she didn't need to be tonight. Just too big, too strong and too powerful.

 

Malaysia leaves the ring, looking back briefly at what she's left behind, before she walks off content with her work.

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"Clean shirt, new shoes

and I don't know what I am gonna do.

Silk suit, black tie,

I don't need a reason why.

They come runnin' just as fast as they can

cause every girl is crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man."

 

Wearing fine black slacks, Wright strides into an arena that greets him with hatred. He goes from side to side of the entrance stage, looking out into the audience and dismissing them with a pitying frown. He quickly puts on a smile, as he heads down entrance ramp.

 

COLE

I wasn’t expecting an appearance from Christian Wright, but I guess we’ve got one whether we like it or not!

 

COACH

And I personally love an appearance from The Centennial Man!

 

Christian struts up the ring step, nodding approvingly for himself as he does so. Upon entering the ring, he’s handed a microphone, pleasing no one but himself.

 

WRIGHT

For thy sake of a timely cessation to this twilight’s festival, I shall be brief in my words and fierce in my intent. No doubt the news of my unbeaten streak has ailed to elude the understanding of your facile minds. As thine self standeth before you on this day’s eve, I am an upholder of strength and valor no more than a small leap to 100 successive victories.

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

WRIGHT

You brickbat me in an emotion that is neither hatred nor is it rage. The name of your blasphemous opprobrium is that of envy! You bear covetousness to that in which you shalt never be! Nay, the fates have not aligned the stars of greatness to shine for you a moonlit path to immortality. Not like it has done to the god child who stands as a tall as heaven’s greatest gladiator. Yet, my heart is has a birth of a great pity for the lot of you. Compunction seeps through my spoken word, and in sympathy I feel the crushing weight of your failed expectations, your unrequited goals, and your numerous miscues and mishaps!

 

“YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!”

 

WRIGHT

I suck nothing but the teet of successes’ bountiful bosoms. Hate me not, dear friends, for I come portaging a generous endowment of hope and a brighter paradise. My friends, I shall sacrifice no more of our time together. I shall devout my words to my cause. I seek to offer one of you the opportunity to revitalize your languid life, energize your downtrodden soul and lay rest to my unbeaten streak!

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Is he challenging the crowd?

 

Apparently so, as Wright begins scanning the audience for volunteers. He spends no more than twenty seconds before he settles on a stocky gentleman with bald hair and a thick beard.

 

WRIGHT

You, good sir, you, make haste and accept my invite for fistifcuffsmanship.

 

The man makes his way over the guardrail and into the ring per CW’s orders. He’s pumped up with excitement and hops back and forth with an energetic pip.

 

MAN

My name is Buddy Wilson, and I’m ready to whup some ass!

 

WRIGHT

And you shalt whup said ass, my friend.

 

DING DING DING

 

A frightful look appears on Wright’s face as he stares at his foe. Before Buddy can even get into a fighting stance., CW charges across the ring and turns him inside out with a lariat.

 

COLE

Good god.

 

Wright picks Buddy up off the ground as he smiles to himself. He then irish whips his foe into a nearby corner. As soon as Buddy hits the posts, Wright charges after him and strikes him in the jaw with a running dropkick. Buddy stumbles out the corner, only to be smacked in the chin with a pair of European Uppercuts. Buddy tries to shield himself, but that does nothing to help him as Wright merely kicks him to the ground.

 

COACH

I’m lovin it, like it was McDonalds!

 

Wright bounces off the ropes and hits his now standing rival with a running elbow shot. Buddy falls to the floor, blood spilling out his nose.

 

COLE

I think he might have a broken nose, Coach.

 

COACH

It should be considered an honor to have your nose broken by The Centennial Man!

 

Buddy scrambles to his feet, trying to get away from a still smiling Christian. There’s no escape for him , however, as the God Child punishes him with a Wright Off! Though that move succeeded in knocking out Buddy, CW hasn’t quite done yet. He scrapes Buppy off the canavs, and raises him into the air. From there he executes the dangerous Stockmarket Crash (Gordbuster)!

 

“OOOOOHHHHHHHH!”

 

Still smiling to himself, The Natural attempts a pinfall….

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THREE!

 

DING DING DING DING

 

Wright reacts as if he just beat Reject for the world title, grinning broadly and holding his arms in the air.

 

COACH

Poor Buddy, poor, poor man. Heaven needed an angel as beautiful as you, Buddy.

 

COLE

This is no laughing matter. I masturbate in the comfort of my car when its parked outside of the neighborhood elementary school. Furthermore there should be no pleasure in the decimation of an OAOAST Mark. Buddy Wilson deserved a better fate.

 

The Natural is given a microphone which does not please the crowd.

 

WRIGHT

From this day forth, I defiantely vow... no man, woman nor beast shall commit thine self to defeat!

 

“BOOOOOOOOO!”

 

COLE

Familiar words from Christian Wright. The streak continues with a crushing defeat of Buddy Wilson.

 

 

OAOAST HeldDOWN~!

THIS WEEK

ONLY ON TSM AND THE PIT!

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NRssleonalix.jpg

 

Veteran ring announcer Michael Buffer stands ready to introduce the superstars for tonight's mainevent!

 

BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen the following is a five person survivor series match and it is our mainevent of the evening!

 

There’s a large pop that spreads through the arena

 

Slow and meandering is the ghetto hymn of Final Ride that brings out the Deadly Alliance members. As the track pours out wisdom of the streets, Reject, dressed in funky red and white tye dyed tights, raises his OAOAST world title to the booing fans. Wearing his usual thunderbolt attire, ThunderKid hops back and forth on his black boots to warm himself up.

 

BUFFER

Introducing first….from Green Bay, Wisconsin... he weighs in at two hundred and fifty pounds. Representing The Deadly Alliance, a former One and Only Tag Team Chmapion , Heartland Champion, and US Champion he is TTHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUNN - DDEEEEEEERRRRRKKIIIIIIIIIIIIDD!!!!! And hailing from The Bronx, New York. He weighs in tonight at two hundred and thirty five pounds. Representing The Deadly Alliance...he is the current OAOAST World Champion…ladies and gentlemen, this is co-captain of Team Leject…. RRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEJJJJJEEEEEEEEEEEEEECCTT!!!!!

 

With silver lights pounding around the entrance setting, the disliked duo stalk down the entrance ramp. TK works as Reject’s hypeman, patting him on the back and offering encouraging shoulder rubs. However, Reject needs no pep rally; he confidently swaggers his way towards the ring.

 

COLE

ThunderKid, Reject, this is the Deadly Alliance, and Reject is the OAOAST World Champion. Its still a mystery why Leon Rodez chose these two men onto his team-

 

COACH

Damn, you’re stupid sometimes. He chose these dudes, cause he knew they were the best. One’s the world champ, and the other is the best technical wrestler in the game. If you have a choice, how you gonna leave these cats off?

 

Upon entering the ring, Reject holds up his title to once more incite the wrath of the stadium crowd. TK stands behind him, shadowing boxing to arrogantly show off his striking skills.

 

BUFFER

And their teammates…

 

“HEY! WAIT! I GOT A NEW COMPLAINT!”

 

“BOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

The Heavenly Rocker’s complaint must relate to the booing OAOAST Marks, because Logan, bound in leather pants with a dying angel on the right leg, storms out cursing a blue stream at them. His leather boots carry him from end to end of the stage, as he throws a legendary temper tantrum about the poor reception. Synth remains a pillar of calm serenity, as he and Abdullah join hands for prayer.

 

BUFFER

From Sin City, they are three time OAOAST World Tag Team Champions, being accompanied by Abdullah Abir Nerdly they are LOGAN MAN, SYNTH ABDUL JABBAR, THE HEAVENLLLLYYYYY ROOOOCKKKERSSSSSSSS!

 

More boos, and more outrage from the Macho MACHO Mann. Synth for his part, calmly adjust his white tights with blue clouds on the back. Together they hit a ring that’s dressed in multicolored spotlights. Upon entering they shake hands with the Deadly Alliance outfit.

 

COLE

Easy to see why Leon picked these two. Even with Logan’s horrendous attitude they are a force to be reckoned with and provide excellent team play for this man….

 

"Oh (hey!), I've been travelin' on this road too long

Just tryin' to find my way back home

But the old me's dead and gone

Dead and gone

And oh (hey!), I've been travelin' on this road too long

Just tryin' to find my way back home

But the old me's dead and gone

Dead and gone, dead and gone..."

 

Dead And Gone" by T.I. soon turns into "Numb" by Linkin Park. The fresh change of songs, brings out fresh boos for the former world champion. Leon Rodez pushes his way through much too slow entrance doors and scowls at the scenery around him. He fiddles with his tight jersey style singlet, before spitting in the direction of the OAOAST Marks

 

"I'VE BECOME SO NUMB

I CAN'T FEEL YOU THERE

BECOME SO TIRED

SO MUCH MORE AWARE!

I'M BECOMING THIS

ALL I WANT TO DO

IS BE MORE LIKE ME

AND BE LESS LIKE YOU!"

 

BUFFER

And the final co-captain…coming from Grand Rapids, Michigan, he is a two time OAOAST World Champion, he is LEEOOOOOOONNNN ROOOOOOOODEZZZZZZZ

 

Rodez stomps down the entrance ramp, greeting everyone his eyes meet with equal disdain and hatred. His partners aren’t spared from his troubling looks. They give him a wide berth as he slides into the ring, and huddles with himself in the corner.

 

COLE

There stands a man filled with hatred, deep hatred for the entire world around him. And he’s stirred up the hatred of Alix Maria Spezia who’s organized her own team to take on this all-star squad of Leon Rodez.

 

 

*BbwWbAhmotherfuckerLlIiiBbbEErRrAATtTeeyYyOUUurRrMmmMmMiIInNnDddDd!!*

 

"YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"!!!"

 

COLE

Speaking of all stars!

 

Onto the stage emerges the recipient of this generous outpouring of emotion, Bohemoth. Grey lights flicker back and forth on the entrance stage, as the well muscled brawler flexes his powerful biceps for the world to see. He then bounds from side to side, letting the audience know he appreciates their amazing support.

 

BUFFER

Introducing Team ALFIX! First, making his way to the ring, he is the 2009 Lethal Rumble winner, he weighs 284 pounds, and hails from Greenville, South Carolina. He is the Metrosexual Monster, BOOOOOOHEMOOOOOTHHHHHHHH!

 

Another loud cheer fills the arena. Attired in black trunks that boast an intricate tribal pattern on the back, Big Bo carries himself down the entrance ramp. As he passes by fans pat him on his incredible physique.

 

COLE

Team Alfix’s heaviest hitter. What scary power this man owns!

 

Bo jogs up the ring steps and enters the ring, marching right past Buffer to climb onto the second turnbuckle.

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans scream as the big man holds his fist towards the stands.

 

A simplified(?) love sick taking no prisoners

Sunny day, cold heart- listen up listeners

Darkside love affair, out of time and in a rush

You can’t help me till the sunrise lifts up(?)

Let’s levitate up over the horizon

I can see it in your eyes, everything you’re hiding

I can see the truth in you even when you’re lying

Even through the darkness, I can see you shining

 

As Lupe Fiasco’s Solar Midnite plays teenage girls across the country leap to their feet and scream their loudest for the arrival of D*LUX.

 

COLE

You’d think Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner just entered the arena form that huge cheer!

 

The Motown Hotties, clad in red denim jackets and matching jeans, each head to the opposite end of the stage to fire up the standing audience. Afterwards they come to the center of the stage where Maya Duncan-Blanchard rips away their jackets for a crowd pleasing look at their toned bodies. She hooks her arms between their and with a playful smile walks them towards the ring.

 

BUFFER

Now making their way to the ring, from Detroit, Michigan, they are accompanied by Maya Duncan-Blanchard, they are TREMENDOUS TYLER BRYANT, SHOWTIME SHAYNE BRAVE….D*LUUUXXXXXXXXXXXX!

 

WELL ITS MIDNIGHT

AND ITS COLDER

PULL YOU CLOSER

I CAN SEE THROUGH

WHEN ITS SUNSHINE

AND ITS SOLAR

AND ITS OVER

GUESS ITS ME AND YOU

 

BLOOD. BY. SUN. LIGHT

 

A huge pop leaps from the stands as the boys slide their way into the ring. They further work up an already frenzied audience, before turning towards Bo and shaking hands with the big man.

 

BUFFER

And now for the Co-Captains….

 

The classic known as Magnum Opus begins playing, and the lights blink off inside the arena. The arena stays poorly lit, the only light shining done by those with lighters or glowsticks. A sharp metal gold light floods the stage, and welcomes Alfdogg from the parted doors. The fans give off a mammoth pop for the OAOAST legend who wears black windbreaker pads with white t-shirt sleeves torn off. Though simply dressed Alf cuts an impressive figure, as the worried looks of TK and Reject allude to.

 

BUFFER

Introdoucing first, from Anderson, Indiana, he is a two time OAOAST world champion, a three time Heartland Champion and an OAOAST original…he is ALFDOOGGGGGGGG!

 

“YEAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Can Maya pick talent or what?

 

COACH

It’s a good thing she was there. Alix’d probably pick Spongebob Squarepants for a partner if it were left to her. Have her team making Krabby Patties for training.

 

Alf plays things cool down the entrance ramp, nodding to those fans that offer him words of support. Reaching the end of the entrance ramp, his eyes meet with Reject, and the two share an INTENSE~! Staredown

 

She's nothing like a girl you've ever seen before

Nothing you can compare to your neighbourhood hoe

I'm tryna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful

The way that booty movin I can't take no more

Have to stop what i'm doin so I can pull up close

I'm tryna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful

 

bops its way into the arena. A gigantic cheer erupts from the sold out Air Canada Centre, as a Neon Lit bar named “Alix’s” rolls onto stage, with patrons and all. Attired in dead sexy white booty shorts and a matching faux fur white bikini top with silver boa, Alix decides to do a little Irish jig for everyone’s enjoyment. Once complete with that, she jumps off the bar and blows a kiss to the screen. Super imposed red lips pop up and that is just sooooooooo cute!

 

BUFFER

And the other captain, from Los Angeles, California, she is The Hollywood Bad Girl, ALIX MARIA SPEZAAAAAAIAAAAAAA!

 

Alix happily skips down the ramp, tossing her silver boa to the most attractive girl she can find. She finally hits the ring, and forgoes playing to the crowd to launch a ferocious glare at Leon. Her team holds her back before she can try anything, however.

 

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DING DING DING

 

Both teams engage in a bit of conferencing and strategy. Alix and Alf seem to be offering words of encouragement, whereas Leon and Reject are issuing direct orders. Either way one fan displeased,

 

“HEY SHIT BRAINS! IF I WANTED TO SEE A GAY ORGY, I’D GO TO A NURSING HOME AND MAKE 5 OLD CRIPPLES WHEELCHAIR FUCK. GET TO WORK!”

 

That comment hurries things along, as Tyler starts against his team and the world champion goes for his. Both men circle each other with Tyler holding a serious look and Reject merely grinning. After several seconds of pacing, the two come together in the center of the ring for a lockup.

 

“REJECT SUCKS! REJECT SUCKS! REJECT SUCKS!”

 

While the audience taunts the champion, the man himself tightens Tyler into a headlock. He wrenches and torques on the neck, smiling brightly as he does so. His pleasant state doesn’t last long as Tyler attempts to shove him into the ring ropes. But Reject drops to his knees and holds firm on the hold. He then flips Tyler forward, locking him down on the mat. Tyler struggles to be free, but finds little reprive from Reject.

 

“LET’S GO TYLER! LET’S GO TYLER! LET’S GO TYLER!” the crowd sings.

 

Tyler draws strength from the audience chants, and begins to find the will to push upwards. Reject tries his hardest to hold him down, but Tyler forces with all his might. Now standing he pushes the world champion into the ropes. A blind tag is made by Synth, but this does little to help Reject as he’s overtaken by a leg lariat! There’s little time for celebration as Synth clubs Tyler from behind as he begins to rise. He then grabs onto his forearm, and roughly throws him into the ropes. Synth lowers his head, assuming the boyband hottie will leapfrog him. But Abdul Jabbar has an error in judgement, as Tyler’s return sees him punt Synth in the chest. The Rocker rockets upwards, clutching onto his sore pecs. But he leaves himself defenseless and Tyler is able to attack him with a jumping lariat!

 

“YEAH-UH!” he shouts to a grand response from the fans. Another powerful cheer comes from the stands when Tyler reaches to his side and makes the tag with Alfdogg.

 

COLE

Two time world champion, Alfdogg, entering the ring. There isn’t much in the OAOAST that this man hasn’t done.

 

Alfdogg enters the ring and is immediately pounced upon by Synth. The three time tag team champion hits him with all the might and power in his body. The punches cause Alf to seek a retreat, but his only escape is to a neutral corner. There Synth traps him on the ringposts and ascends the ropes, in order to headbutt Alf!

 

COLE

I say it everytime and its worth repeating, I don’t know how Synth gets away with wearing snowboarding goggles to the ring, and then using them as weapons. Am I the only one who sees this?

 

But Synth’s attack does not go exactly to plan; Alf gathers up a rush of strength and uses it to powerbomb Abdul Jabbar into the canvas. On the outside Abdullah Abir Nerdly is overpowered by dread and worry for his disciple. He watches on in horror as referee Earl Hebner counts the pinfall….

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Reject breaks up the pinfall, and then quickly scuttles away from an enraged Alf. Seething, Alf tries to chase down Reject, but he’s held back by Hebner in an effort to keep the peace. Behind this scene, Synth slinks his way to his corner and applies the tag to ThunderKid. The Green Bay native enters the ring with intentions of ambushing Alf. But as he charges forward, Alf becomes aware of his foe’s position and turns around to lacerate TK with a diving lariat! The fans celebrate with joyous cheers as TK is left writhing in pain on the canvas. Alf doesn’t help his situation any when he begins stomping at TK’s arm. He then lifts his former friend off the canvas and wrenches on a now sour arm. TK squeals in pain, and barely can suppress an urge to tap when Alf traps him inside a standing arm bar.

 

“ALF! ALF! ALF! ALF!” the fans sing. Alf gives them much more to cheer about as he shoves TK arm first against the turnbuckle posts. The Deadly Alliance member stumbles forward, walking straight into Alf’s arms. Alf pauses for a few seconds, before hurtling TK across the ring with a belly to belly overhead suplex. Fortunately for TK he lands near his corner, and is able to make a desperation tag to Logan Mann. Less fortunate is Logan, who bears witness to Alf tagging Bohemoth!

 

“YEAAAAAA!” the fans scream while Logan’s eyes go wide with terror. He makes a hasty attempt to tag out the ring,. But before he can get any one to assist him, the giant mastadon is upon him! Bo wraps his mammoth hands around Mann’s neck and throws him into a neutral corner. Mann’s body sags against the ring posts and its soon battered by punches from the giant.

 

COACH

Man, Logan picked a bad time to get into this match. This almost isn’t fair!

 

Bo backs away from Mann and wildly beats his chest with his fists. This psyches the crowd up and they cheer him on as he rush at Mann. He strikes The Rocker directly in the chest with a powerful lariat. Mann stumbles out the corner, exhausted and wounded. As such he’s easily victimized by the sidewalk slam Bo nails him with. Hebner gets on his knees to count the ensuing pinfall…

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Once again TK is there to break up the pinfall! Bo gives chase to TK, but he remains elusive by scurrying out the ring. Less than pleased, Bo takes his frustration out on a now standing Mann by running bim down with a lariat! Bo then stomps the ground, psyching both himself and the audience up. He picks up Mann and sends him running to the ropes. There Reject makes a blind tag. This helps Mann not one bit; Bo raises him high into the air then nearly puts him through the mat with a deadly spinebuster!

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Amidst the celebration over Bo’s impressive tactics, Reject has climbed atop the third rope. The Bronx favorite son flies off his nest with an axe handle smash aimed at Bo’s back. But The Meterosexual Monster whirls around and catches Reject across his arms.

 

COLE

Could there be an Erotic Awakening coming up? I feel something awakening deep within my loins!

 

TK has different plans than Bo and pulls out a key item in their execution, a roll of quarters. While Mann distracts the referee with one of his famous rants, TK leans over the ropes and uppercuts Bo with a fist full of rolled up quarters! Bo timbers over like a massive redwood, and falls to the ground with blood pouring out as if a dam broke.

 

COLE

Good god!

 

A recovered and very thankful Reject makes a desperation pin…

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

“BULLLSHIT! BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT!”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED: Bohemoth

By Reject

Remaining on Team Alfix- Alix,Alf, Tyler, Shayne

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

Absolutely absurd, Bo is out this match and out cold because ThunderKid hit him with a roll of quarters. A roll of quarters! How the hell does he even get that to the ring?

 

COACH

It ain’t ThunderKid’s fault that Hebner forgot to pat everybody down before this match started.

 

COLE

But it is ThunderKid’s fault that he has zero class or sportsmanship. Bo’s going to give him some payback one day. I’m sure of it.

 

TK accepts gracious pats on the back from The Rockers, as Shyane Brave rushes into the ring for the first time today. Shayne instantly lunges for Reject, but the world champion strikes like a snake, leaping upwards for a Euology! Yet somehow, Brave finds a way to counter the lethal finisher by shoving Reject away. Reject lands against the ropes, caught off guard and off balance. Because of this Brave assumes he’ll easily be able to knock him over the ropes. But his assumption proves incorrect; Reject ducks down and uses Shayne’s momentum to flip him over the ropes! The stud from Detroit succeeds in landing on his feet. But he’s promptly taken off those very same feet all due to a running boot from TK!

 

COLE

I think someone needs to keep ThunderKid in check. He’s more than just a nuisance; he’s downright dirty cheat! If I didn’t have this sore shoulder, I’d beat his ass myself!

 

Reject bundles Shayne back into the ring and makes a pinfall….

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

A kickout by Shayne allows his team to breathe several sighs of relief. This comfort does not last long, however, all due to Reject grabbing onto Shayne’s leg and twisting him over into a boston crab. Shayne screams out in pain and reaches for the ropes. His hand gets within inches of the cable, but Reject quickly yanks him away to the center of the ring.

 

“LET’S GO SHAYNE! LET’S GO SHAYNE! LET’S GO SHAYNE!” the audience bleats, lead on by Tyler and Alix. The encouragment from teammate and audience alike provides Shayne with the willpower and strength to roll over and kick Reject away. He struck Reject with such force that the world champion is pushed into a corner. Shayne runs after him, but Reject steps forward with a lariat. Shayne uses his agility roll beneath it and uncurl by leaping to the second rope. Before Reject can get a bead on him, Shayne is dragging him down to the canvas with a bulldog! The fans cheer and applaud as Shayne hooks onto Reject’s leg for a cover…

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

ThunderKid breaks up another pin.

 

COLE

In the words of Charlie Brown “Good Grief!”

 

Reject rolls to his feet and is thrown under fire from Brave. Despite the fast firing blows, Reject is able to comeback with furious right hands of his own. But Shayne continues to chip away at his defenses. As such Reject sinks to the lowest level with a blatant lowblow on the youngster. As Shayne is crippled by the cheap shot, Reject hobbles his way to his corner and applies the tag with Logan Mann! Shayne’s archrival, pounds away at his face with vicious left hands that stagger the Detroiter. Having weakened Shayne with those blows, Logan bounces himself off the ropes. Nearing Shayne, he strides forward and flips him over with a running neckbreaker. Quickly Logan returns to his feet, and drops a knee across Shayne’s neck. Logan continues to apply the pressure as he wraps Shayne up inside a reverse chinlock.

 

“Come on Logan, make ‘em tap!” Reject screams from his corner, as his co-captain Leon Rodez looks on with disinterest.

 

COLE

Leon Rodez playing the role of almost an outside observer, same for Alix Maria Spezia, and its there feud that spawned this very mainvent matchup.

 

Logan wrenches and grinds on Shayne’s neck causing terrible pain to the love object of girls everywhere. They try to rally Shayne with chants, but Mann remains firm in his grip. Shayne tries his hardest to fight out the hold, and uses every bit of strength in his body to begin a push upright. Despite Logan’s strong efforts to hold him down, Shayne manages a rise to his feet. There he begins ripping elbows into Mann’s stomach. They land with enough force and enough power to win his freedom. He earns a measure of revenge on Logan by wrapping his arms around Logan’s head and taking him for a nauseating ride with a Tornado DDT! As his team applause his work, Shayne crawls to his corner and takes in Alix.

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans scream, as suddenly Leon looks interested in this contest. Wasting no time with requests or orders, Leon slaps Logan’s back and tags himself into the contest. The fans murmur with anticipation, eager to see this heated showdown between Alix and Leon. The two former lovers come together in the center of the ring where they lock cold eyes in a firey staredown.

 

“LET’S GO ALIX! LET’S GO ALIX! LET’S GO ALIX!”

 

Leon has enough of trading furious glares and attempts to take Alix by surprise with a punch. But the Hollywood Bad Girl blocks his fist and headbutts him in the nose! Leon takes a wild swing at Alix, but the US champion ducks behind him and dropkicks him in the back of the head. He staggers forward, but quickly rights his course to take a run at Alix. But the brunette beauty is ready for his arrival and upends him with a diving hip toss.

 

“YEAAAAAAAAA!”

 

For whatever reason Alix decides to whop like an Indian and does a funky rain dance around Leon’s body. Completing her native American attack the Latina babe drops a tomahawk chop across Leon’s throat. As the fans continue to root her, she scoops Leon off the canvas and throws him at the ropes. She then runs in the opposite direction and pushes herself off the ropes. Returning towards Leon she leaps forward and strikes him in the face with her rear end! Landing on her feet, she immediately spanks her fine ass. Enticed by this gesture, Synth attempts to enter the ring but is held back by referee Hebner. This allows Tyler to sneak into the ring Together he and Alix hook their arms around Leon’s neck. Seconds later they leap forward and crack his neck with a devastating double side effect.

 

“Yippe!” Alix shouts, “That was fun-fun-fun, let’s go get ice cream!”

 

“We still have to finish the match.” Tyler replies.

 

“Super-duper-mega bummer!”

 

Taking her frustrations out on Leon, Alix grabs him by his slick black hair and brings him off the canvas. She tosses him into the corner, and follows up with a knee strike directly into his face. He tries to stagger away, but Alix keeps him locked down with a side headlock.

 

“ARF! ARF! ARF!” she yips before she leaps forward and drives Leon’s head into the mat with a bulldog. She then runs the ropes, and cartwheels back in order to land an elbow across Leon’s face. A pinfall follows….

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

ThunderKid makes the save once more for Team Leject.

 

COLE

Alright, this is insane. He’s spent more time illegally in this match, then he has spent legally.

 

“JESUS HATES YOU! JESUS HATES YOU!” the audience sings to TK, oddly lead on by Maya. Meanwhile Alix attempts to irish whip her former lover. But Rodez reverses the hold and sends Alix into the ropes. There Tyler Bryant makes a blind tag to bring himself into the ring. Leon throws a lariat at Alix, but misses wildly and she slides out of the ring to escape him. Rodez considers following, but he can’t make any move as Tyler wraps him up in a school boy.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

TK is there with another timely save.

 

COLE

That’s it, I’m just gonna keep quiet.

 

COACH

Finally!

 

Leon rolls to his feet, and quickly makes the tag with Synth. Spurred forth by Abdullah’s encouraging words Synth runs at Tyler with a raised knee. But the teenage hunk avoids the attack by leaping up and striking Synth with a dropkick! Synth hurriedly climbs to his feet, but is thrown under pressure by Tyler Bryant’s forearm strikes.

 

“WE LOVE TYLER! WE LOVE TYLER! WE LOVE TYLER!”

 

Ending his parade of punches, Tyler grabs onto Synth’s arm and uses it to toss him towards a netural corner. Tyler runs full speed after him, but carries himself into the raised elbow of Abdul Jabbar. As Tyler clutches his pained face, Synth elevates himself onto the second rope. He says a brief muslim prayer, and with gifts from Allah he jumps towards Bryant. But The Tremendous One has a sudden recovery and flips Synth to the canvas with a powerslam. The referee counts the resulting pinfall as the fans continue to cheer Tyler…

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Unsurprisingly, TK breaks the pinfall with a boot to the back of Bryant’s head. Perhaps more disturbing is that TK remains in the ring. He pulls Tyler up by the scruff of his neck, and then traps him inside a front facelock. He shows a small smile towards his former mentor Alfdogg, before throwing himself backwards and nailing Bryant with the Thunderbolt DDT! The fans are beside themselves in anger, but can only watch helplessly as Synth scurries atop Tyler for a pin…

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

 

THREE!

 

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

COLE

Simply unbelievable. ThunderKid, the thief in the night, striking like lightening. Could’ve broken Bohemoth’s jaw, and now has robbed Team Alfix of another member.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED: TYLER BRYANT

BY: SYNTH ABDUL JABBAR

REMAINING TEAM MEMBERS ON TEAM ALFIX: Alix, Alf, Shayne Brave

~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

 

Without a second of hesitation, Alfdogg enters the ring and waves on the opposing team. Now with some arrogance in his step, Synth agrees to engage in a lockup. The two men struggle to out power the other, each equally matched in strength and skill. But soon enough, Synth begins eeking closer to victory: he slowly pulls Alf towards Team Leject’s corner. But, Alf is wise to these tricks, and uses his technical skills to suddenly drag Synth inside a rollup!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Synth’s pushes himself out the pinfall, and stares at the referee as though he can’t believe a pin was even attempted. He rises to his feet, and is met with a hard knife edge chop from Alfdogg. The attack lands with so much power and force that it forces Synth to fall against the ropes. He doesn’t remain there very long however, as Alf whips him to opposite ropes. The cables spew Synth back towards Alf, and he’s taken off his feet with another lethal knife edge chop! A pinfall soon follows….

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Kickout!

 

Alfdogg attempts to pull Synth towards his feet, but The Rock N Wrestling legend breaks the grip and hammers Alf in the gut with his powder white boot. He then grabs onto Alf’s curly blond hair and throws him backwards with violent force. Alf’s head bounces off the canvas like a tennis ball, and pain spreads across his face. Synth smiles at Alf’s troubles as he tags in his best friend Logan Mann.

 

“NACHO MANN! NACHO MANN! NACHO MANN!”

 

COACH

Will the clever witticisms of the OAOAST Marks ever cease?

 

Logan climbs to the top rope, and spreads his wings. From there he falls forward and bashes Alf chest with a diving headbutt. A cover is made as the heels cheer on Logan…

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Alf gets his shoulder off the canvas. He slowly rolls to his feet, but finds himself under attack by The MACHO Macho Mann. Alf fights back, landing enough powerful blows to trap Logan inside an inverted facelock.

 

COLE

What’s coming up from the OAOAST Legend?

 

The answer? Not a whole lot, as Logan easily knees his way to freedom. With Alf stunned Logan leaps forward and wrenches Alf’s neck with a twisting neckbreaker.

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Alf comes up with another amazing kickout.

 

“ALF! ALF! ALF!”

 

“I agree that show did rock!” Alix comments very enthused.

 

Both competitors get to their feet with Alf drawing first blood with a spinning back fist that lands against Mann’s chin. Alf then tries a belly to belly overhead suplex, but Logan blocks the attack. Stubborn till the very end, Alf tries once more. This time Logan powers Alf to the ground with a double leg takedown. Nodding towards his team, Mann bridges backwards and slingshots Alf towards the nearest corner. Fortunately. Alf succeeds in landing easily atop the second turnbuckle. Mann fails to realize this, as he rises with a cocky expression. He’s made aware of Alf’s position far too late as Alf comes off the second rope with a cross body block! The referee counts the resulting pinfall as soon as the two warriors touch the canvas….

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THREE!

 

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAA!” comes the noise of a surprised audience. Equally surprised is Logan Mann who throws a frenzied temper tantrum on his way out of the ring. After acquiring a steel chair he demands to be let back into the ring. Fortunately ringside security is there to escort him away, before any damage can be done.

 

COLE

How about that? The old Dogg pulling out some new tricks here at November Reign.

 

ELIMINATED: LOGAN MANN

BY: ALFDOGG

REMAINING TEAM MEMBERS ON TEAM LEJECT: TK, RODEZ, REJECT, SYNTH

 

TK runs into the match and lariats a celebrating Alfdogg from behind.

 

COLE

Who else but ThunderKid?

 

ThunderKid screams for Alf to get back to his feet, promising a severe blood letting for all to see. Alf gets to his feet, but doesn’t answer TK’s challenge. Instead he tags in Alix to a gigantic pop.

 

“I’m gonna wack you good!” She promises to TK. Alix makes good on that guarantee, by running through TK with a diving forearm.

 

COLE

Alright! Take it to him!

 

COACH

Mikey, could you pretend to be objective?

 

COLE

He could’ve broke Bohemoth’s jaw. Screw objectivity!

 

TK is back to his feet, staggering but still throwing hands. His punches miss their mark by wide margins and Alix is able to take him off his feet with a dropkick. The fans cheer Alix’s showing, while TK grumbles to himself as he climbs off the mat. Alix seizes hold of him, and then irish whips him into a near corner.

 

“Ooooh I’m gonna kick you in the spleen!” Alix shouts.

 

“Spleen?” Alf wonders.

 

Showing her lack of understanding for the human anatomy, Alix rams TK in the stomach with a shoulder block. Either way this causes the trickster from Green Bay to sag down to the canvas and lean against the bottom ropes.

 

“What time is it?” Alix shouts to the fans.

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

“No seriously what time is it? I need to use my phone to set my DVR for John and Kate. On this episode the kids stage a coup d’etat and sacrifice their parents in the town square!”

 

Alix leaves her DVR issues behind and runs towards TK. Much to his delight, she lands across his face with a bronco buster! Alix furiously bucks and grinds against TK’s face, bringing him an eternity’s worth of pleasure. Alix herself is enjoying things a weeeee bit too much

 

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Alix dismounts and pulls TK to his feet and slaps him across the face!

 

“That’ll teach you to let me bounce my kitty kat on your face and make me enjoy it, jerkface!”

 

“OHHHHHH!” the fans are amazed by Alix’s show of disrespect. Angered, TK rifles a haymaker at Alix. But the California cutie ducks behind TK, and hooks onto his arms. With minimal struggle she’s able to brig him down with a backslide!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

A kickout by TK!

 

“BOOOOOOOO!”

 

TK heads upright, and finds himself back on the attack thanks to a pair of elbows against Alix’s skull. He cocks his arm back as far as it can go and then roars forward to blast her with another elbow strike. Alix staggers backwards into the ropes, knocked loopy from the powerful shot. Thankfully for her, Shayne Brave tags himself into the contest. TK, however, is unaware of this and keeps his focus on Ally, taking her down to the canvas with a side belly to belly suplex. But as he returns upright, Shayne’s clamps down on his head. Having no time to defend himself, TK is violently flung over by the Shaynedrop!

 

“YEAAAAAAAAA!” the audience pops for Shayne’s snapmare driver. Shayne follows up with a pinfall…

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

 

 

COLE

FINALLY! FINALLY! The nuisance that is ThunderKid is gone!

 

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~~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED: THUNDERKID

BY: SHAYNE BRAVE

REMAINING TEAM MEMBERS ON TEAM LEJECT: RODEZ, REJECT, SYNTH

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

While TK is rolled out the ring, Synth is running into it. He comes darting at Shayne with a polish hammer. But Shayne grabs him upon his arrival and rolls him into an inside cradle!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

A kickout by Synth. While Abdul Jabbar catches his breath, Brave moves to his corner and tags Alfdogg. The fans put out another grand cheer for the OAOAST Legend. Alf wastes no time in taking the fight to Synth, battering him in the corner with vicious knife edge chops.

 

COLE

Best in the business!

 

Synth shoves Alf away out of desperation. But he gets little reprive, as Alf promptly comes rushing back towards him. The devout spiritualist raises his boot and catches Alf in the face. The legend stumbles backwards, allowing Synth to throw him to the ground with a running lariat. As soon as Alf hits the canvas, Synth is on top of him for a pinfall….

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Alf with the kickout!

 

Synth stomps at Alf before he drops downwards and wraps his strong legs around Alf’s torso. The bodylock becomes an instant torture for Alf as his ribs and breathing are now constricted. Synth and his team yell for Alf to submit. However the two time world champion refuses to do just that, and fights vigorously to be rid of the hold. His perseverance quickly pays off, as he’s able to shift his body towards a position that faces Synth. There he succeeds in grabbing onto Synth’s legs, and slowly begins twisting his way upright to set up the sharpshooter! Synth is deliriously frightful of that hold, and thrashes at Alf. Thanks to this maniac movement, Synth is able to avoid Alf’s match ending submission. Not wanting to be put in that same position again, Synth scrambles to his corner and applies the tag with Leon Rodez. The audience, as you can imagine, is severely angered to see the former Grand Rapids Golden Child. Alf immediately pounces upon Leon as his feet touch the ring mat. But, Leon is ready for Alf and beats him back with overhand rights. Alf refuses to give up, and comes right back at Leon. But Rodez grabs onto Alf and flips him backwards with an Exploder Suplex! The fans are none to happy to see that devastating move, and boo while Synth and Reject applaud.

 

COACH

Two former world champions going at it. It don’t get much better than this, Mikey.

 

COLE

And you can only see it on the OAOAST!

 

Leon grabs onto Alf’s thick curly hair and begins pulling him back upright. Despite feeling the effects of the exploder suplex, Alf continues to fight back against Rodez. This doesn’t please the former tag team champion and he knocks Alf back down to the canvas with a knee to the face. Rodez follows that move up with a leaping elbow strike onto Alf’s neck. Having had his thrill for now, Leon retreats to his corner to tag Synth.

 

COLE

Synth certainly getting his workout, and earning his paycheck tonight. He’s the go to guy with ThunderKid finally banished to the back. I still can’t get over the lack of respect ThunderKid showed by hitting Bo in the jaw with a roll of quarters. We still don’t even have an update on Bo’s condition.

 

COACH

Will you quit whining about that?

 

Synth climbs atop the third turnbuckle, causing the crowd to buzz in anticipation of major aerial assault. The Synthmeister doesn’t disappoint the OAOAST Marks; he flies forward with the famous Sky hook elbow! But Alf rolls out the way, and Synth is left to crash into the canvas. This thrills the Canadian audience, and Alf as well as it allows him to make a tag with Shayne Brave!

 

“SHAYNE’S A HOTTIE! SHAYNE’S A HOTTIE!” the ladies in attendance chant. The recipent of their love, makes his presence felt with a leg lariat that takes Synth off his feet. He quickly picks Synth off the canvas, and attempts an irish whip. However, Synth reveres it and throws Shayne to the ropes. The devout spiritualist hounds a path behind Shayne, expecting to crash into his back with a body splash. But Shayne runs up to the second rope, and then flies at Synth with a cross body block. Hebner counts the resulting pinfall as the audience cheers wildly….

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

THRE-NO REJECT HAS THE REFEREE DISTRACTED

 

Displeased over having a certain three count interrupted, Shayne moves to confront Reject. At that point Reject releases his grasp on the referee’s attention and plays calm and innocent. Assured that the world champion’s meddling is over, Shayne turns back towards Synth……and takes a Percussion DDT!

 

COLE

Oh no!

 

Synth rolls the defeated Brave onto his back and makes the cover…

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THREE!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

COACH

D*LUX is done for the night! Done in both times by the man Synth Abdul Jabbar. Sin City’s own talk of the town.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED: SHAYNE BRAVE

BY: SYNTH ABDULL JABBAR

REMAINING TEAM MEMBERS ON TEAM ALFIX: ALIX, ALF

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

There’s little time for celebration for Synth as he’s immediately struck in the face by a missile dropkick from Alix! The bubbly babe happily scampers atop Synth for a cover….

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

Nope!

 

Alix gets the sniffles, a little sad over not getting the three count. Referee Earl Hebner tries to console her, but is interrupted by Synth shoving him away. The Synthmeister grabs onto Alix’s coffee colored hair and hauls her off the canvas. Never one to be bullied, Alix fights back by poking him in the eye.

 

Synth wears goggles, btw.

 

Apparently not realizing what that means, Alix pokes him in the eye again. Again, and again, and again until Synth loses his cool, rips off his goggles and screms “NOW POKE ME!” Giddy and beside herself, Alix does just that and predictably Synth screams in horror.

 

“Idiot.” Leon laments on the ring apron.

 

Alix snapmares her foe to the groud, and then jumps into the air to land BUTT first across his face!

 

COACH

Broken nose courtesy of the finest Latina ass in Los Angeles. Mamacita got back!

 

Alix gets to her feet and merrily skips to the corner to tag in Alf. The fans welcome the OAOAST hero back into the match once more. Synth on the other hand, greets him with left jabs. But Alf shrugs away these blows and whips knife edge chops that back Synth into ring posts. Alf lays in a few more flesh ripping chops before finally sending Synth across the ring to the opposite corner. Though he hits the posts hard, Synth comes roaring out with a lariat! Alf ducks the attack, and Synth is forced to try a discus punch. This attack is an utter failure as Alf grabs onto Synth’s legs and dumps him back to the canavs. The Indiana native then steps through Synth’s legs and begins to twist him over.

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans rise to their feet, ready for the sharpshooter. Alf gives them what they’ve come for, and breaks pasts Synth defenses for his deadly submission!

 

COLE

He got it!

 

Synth can mount only the weakest of struggles before he’s forced to tap out to the legendary sharpshooter!

 

“YEAAAAAAAAA!”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED: SYNTH ABDUL JABBAR

BY: ALFDOGG

REMAINING TEAM MEMBERS ON TEAM LEJECT: RODEZ, REJECT,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Leon Rodez leaps into the ring, and stares at Alf and Alix with a look that’s full of pure venom. Suddenly Leon pounces like a snake, swinging his fist at Alf. The two time world champion ducks the other two time world champion’s attack. Leon spins around to get a read on Alf and is met with super fast right jabs. Rodez attempts to escape towards a corner. But Alf stalks his path, and throws Leon under heavy fire.

 

COLE

Look at the foursome we’re left with, world champion Reject, two time world champion Leon Rodez, two time world champion Alfdogg, and four time tag team champion Alix Maria Spezia. It doesn’t get much better than that.

 

Growing sick of being mercilessly pounded, Leon resorts to cheap tactics and grabs onto Alf’s hair to yank him against the top rope. Alf falls over, put under distressing amount of pain. He crawls away from Leon, clutching his sore jaw. Behind him Leon takes a run of the ropes, rebounding to strike Alf in the head with double knee drop.

 

“LET’S GO ALF! LEON SUCKS! LET’S GO ALF! LEON SUCKS!” the fans chant. In response to this, Leon targets one of their favorites by shoving Alix off the ring apron.

 

“Ooooooh that does it, meanine!” Alix hollers before attempting to get back into the ring to face Leon. But she’s halted by Earl Hebner, who seeks to keep the peace between these two rivals.

 

Leon returns to Alf and is welcomed with several PAINFUL knife edge chops.

 

COLE

No body does chopping better than Alfdogg. Whoooooo!

 

Leon is granted a short respite, thanks to Reject distracting Alf. Alf does away with the bothersome world champion and rushes back towards Leon. Leon attempts to hit him with a straight left. But Alf ducks down and SPEARS Leon with brutal force

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans scream as Alf attempts a pinfall…

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Reject breaks up the pin with an axe handle smash to Alf’s back. Frustrated beyond all belief, Alf begins tear at Reject’s chest with his trademark chops. Reject has no intention of being beaten down by chops, and simply punts his former mentor between the uprights.

 

“BOOOOOOOOO!” the fans disapprove, having to watch Alf sag down to his knees.

Their mood gets even worse when Leon hits the One Hit Kill (spinning back heelkick to the face.)!

 

COACH

Hahhahhaa! Put that dogg to sleep, his ass is done!

 

So thinks Leon Rodez as he hooks both of Alf’s leg for a cover….

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THREE!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED: ALFDOGG

BY: LEON RODEZ

REMAINING TEAM MEMBERS ON TEAM ALFIX: ALIX

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

A cheap shot did in Alfdogg and its just Alix against two men with three world championships between them.

 

“ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” the sold out fans sing, as their heroine enters the ring. She stares down Leon once more, the heat between them burning as hot as the most powerful of furnace

 

“Hey, what’s that?” She asks through a grin.

 

“What’s what?”

 

BAM!

 

“Its my hand upside your face, btich!” she screams before she unleashes a hell storm of punches against Rodez’s face. The fans continue to cheer her on as she batters at Rodez, and attempts to irish whip him. But The Fallen Idol reverses and pulls atop his shoulders for a standing fireman’s carry.

 

COLE

What’s this?

 

Alix slides out after a major struggle for her freedom. Upon landing on the mat she whips her tennis shoes back at Leon with a spinning round house. But Rodez slides out the way, narrowly avoiding decapitation. Rodez springs to his feet and takes another run at Alix. But the Hollywood Bad Girl and her white booty shorts take down Leon with a BUTT bump. As Rodez struggles to his feet, Alix leaps onto the second rope. The minute Rodez is fully upright, The Hollywood Bad Girl springs forward and takes him out with a spear that comes Straight Outta Comprton! The fans cheer while Alix covers Leon….

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Leon with the kickout. He comes back to his feet, and slinks to the corner next to his own. Alix screams like a savage on the warpath and charges in, leaping with a body splash. But Rodez slides out the way and poor Alix has a miserable collision with the ring posts. This allows Rodez to slide down his corner and apply a tag to Reject.

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

COACH

Here comes the champ, riding on top of the world!

 

The world champion rushes into the ring, beating at Alix with heavy kicks and punches. Having doubled up Alix, Reject coils his arms around her neck and then falls backwards to drive her neck into the ground with a DDT. Alix groans in agony, as Reject makes the pinfall….

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Alix finds her way out the pinfall.

 

“LET’S GO ALIX! LET’S GO ALIX! LET’S GO ALIX!”

 

Reject grabs Alix by the back of her tube top and then throws her into the ropes. On the return, she catches onto her and flips her to the canvas with a powerslam! Hook of the leg, and a cover…

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Kickout!

 

Reject shoots Hebner a frustrated glare as he begins to pull Alix up by the arm. He traps her inside a front facelock, holds onto her booty shorts and then dumps her backwards with a vertical suplex. He then eagerly floats over with a cover….

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

Kickout!

 

Alix crawls to the ropes, and uses them as support to bring herself upright. She leans against the turnbuckle posts, bone weary and exhausted. From that position she’s thrown under attack by Reject. He rushes forward and clobbers her with a turnbuckle lariat. She stumbles away from the corner, allowing Reject to ascend to the second rope. He flies off with speed, dragging her down with a second rope bulldog. A pinfall results…

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

Alix amazes the fans and frustrates Reject and Leon with another kickout!

 

“LET’S GO ALIX! LET’S GO ALIX! LET’S GO ALIX!”

 

Having exhausted all his methods for victory, a dejected Reject begrudgingly makes the tag with Leon Rodez.

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” the audience hisses, watching Rodez step through the cables.

 

COLE

From one hated villain to the next, Reject tags in his rival Leon Rodez.

 

Leon grabs hold of Alix in a vertical suplex position, and then situates her atop the ring posts! He then climbs upwards, seeking to catch her in hear weakest moment. But Alix shows great strength and resiliency and fights back against Rodez!

 

“ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” the OAOAST Marks sing, as Alix trades shots with Rodez. Unable to win a boxing match atop the turnbuckles, Alix finds another way to score victory ; she BITES Rodez nipples!

 

“OOOOOOWWWWW!” Leon shrieks before Alix releases him and shoves him to the canvas. Understandably outraged Leon attempts to charge back at Ally. But the Los Angeles native dismounts the turnbuckles and strikes him in the face with a dropkick! As the audience cheers wildly, Alix attempts a pinfall….

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

Rodez with the kickout! He hastily returns to his feet, but finds himself hammered by Alix’s slaps and punches. Eventually he’s taken off his feet entirely by a dropsault!

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

The fans joy doesn’t last for very long, as Reject enters the ring to get at Alix. But The Hollywood Bad Girl intercepts his arrival with a spinning wheel kick! Reject goes down hard and Alix pops up to deal with Rodez. But Leon gets hold of her first, rolling her up with a pin.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Alix reverses into a pin of her own!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

Leon reverses!

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

Alix reverses!

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

REJECT WITH THE EULOGY ON ALIX!

 

COLE

Damn it! No!

 

Leon falls on top of Alix for the pinfall….

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THREE!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

WINNER: TEAM LEJECT

SURVIVORS: LEON RODEZ & REJECT

 

COACH

Awwwwww yeah! Eulogy out of no where and this match is finished. Alix didn't even see it coming!

 

COLE

This is true. She, I, and the OAOAST Marks thought she had Leon eliminated, but Reject struck like a snake.

 

BUFFER

Your winners…..TEAM LEJECT

 

There’s little team cohesiveness in the celebration of this hard earned victory. Rodez sits in the corner, an expression disdain holding firm on his face as he looks at Alix. Reject on the other hand celebrates atop the turnbuckle, world title raised to the heavens. Or the scoreboard. Whichever you prefer.

 

COLE

On this night its Reject and Leon Rodez standing tall as survivors and victors. But will the future hold for both these men, as well as the defeated United States Champion Alix Maria Spezia?

 

FADE OUT

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