Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted March 26, 2010 -OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT- Cue::Motley Crue-Motherfucker of the year Here I am again, Hey now, hey now, I'm the motherfucker of the year. Here I am again, Hey now, hey now, I'm the motherfucker of the year. Golden pyro pours down from the ceiling, dancing across the entrance stage. The Angletron boasts highlights of Mister Dick’s triumph’s both professional as well as sexual. The entrance doors come apart and out steps The Human Hard On MISTER DICK at his side clad in a black corset and black denim is Malaysia. Mister Dick flexes his impressive muscles as he strides powerfully through the downpour of pyro. Unable to resist his eye catching physique, Malaysia’s hands obessess over his body, grabbing and fondling every inch they can get a hold of. COLE We are only three days away from Anglemania, and we are joined by the number one contender for the OAOAST world title, Mister Dick. And I bet Jock has a lot on his mind tonight. Certainly more than he has on his body, not that I mind one bit! Upon entering the ring, Mister Dick goes to the top rope to receive a raucous reception from the Rio Rancho audience. He fires them up with another showcase of his masterful muscles. Finally done with the audience, he retrieves a microphone. MISTER DICK Reject, boy, you wanna come out hear and tell your little jokes, play around with old Deadbeat Dave? Son, is that what you wanna do? Is that how you wanna play it days before Anglemania? Son, you better get real serious real fast, because its just days before I lay a whupping on your ass the likes of which you ain’t never seen before! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” MALAYSIA Mmmmmm, yeah. You tell ‘em, baby. You tell em exactly what’s going to happen to him at Anglemania. Tell him and turn me on. MISTER DICK Reject, what’s gonna happen to you at Anglemania is I’m going to march right into Las Vegas, Nevada, I’m going to look ya dead in the eyes, you’re gonna piss yourself like a little child, and then I’m gonna take my boot and Stiff Kick it across yer skull, boy! “YEAAAAAAAAAAA!” MISTER DICK And then I’m gonna Cock Block ya out the OAOAST world title, and Malaysia and I are gonna make out right above yer rotten carcass. MALAYSIA I think I like the sound of that. I can’t wait for Anglemania! MISTER DICK I can’t either, ‘cause Reject you got me madder than a pig without mud to roll in! I’m hoppin mad like a bar fight on a Tuesday night! Ya say ya gonna make me respect ya? Son, I ain’t got no respect for ya, and I ain’t gonna have none fer ya after Anglemania no neither! I disrespect everything about ya, son. From your stupid little stable, to yer stupid little tights, to your stupid little haircut, to your stupid little penis. “OOOOOOOOHHHHH!” MISTER DICK I think yer an all around piece of crap, son, and if Melissa’s vagina knew what was good for her she’d make it a threesome! MISTER DICK Yer fancy little stable wasn’t worth a pot to piss in before I got in it, and it ain’t worth a pot to piss in now that I’m gone “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” MISTER DICK Now, you think attackin Melody is gonna phase me? Boy, you just motivated me all the more to give you the beats. You gave me another reason to sink the god damn dagger into your title run. I ain’t gonna learn nothin’ about respectin ya at Anglemania, but yer gonna learn you can’t measure up to The Dick! “YEAAAAAAAAAA!” Suddenly the audience’s cheers evaporate and are replaced by heated boos. This is all due to the appearance of the world champion, situated in the arena parking lot, on the video screen. REJECT You talk a good game, Jock. I’m very entertained. But as we all know its just talk. Entertaining talk, but its still talk. I don’t think…no, I know you don’t have the balls to back up what you say. You ought to change your name, Jock. Maybe go from Mister Dick to something like Mister Pussy! “OOOOOOOOOH!” the fans react as they watch Mister Dick fume inside the ring. He paces back and forth, trying his best to control his anger. REJECT Do you think differently? Does Mister Dick believe he’s truly got a set? Is Mister Dick’s bite as bad as his bark? You come prove it to me then, Jock. You’re as tough as you say you are? Well then, I’ll be in the parking lot, waiting for you to come and prove it. Let’s see if you got the guts. The video feed cuts off, leaving only Mister Dick teeming with furious fire in its wake. He clenches his fist and shouts profanity at the screen, demanding Reject come to face him. COLE Reject threw down the gauntlet; will it be picked up by Mister Dick? We’ll find out on HeldDOWN~! COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted March 26, 2010 We go backstage to the interview lounge where Josh Matthews waits with a very annoyed guest JOSH I’m here in the interview lounge with Crystal. Crystal, in just three days you’ll be set to face Morgan Nerdly for the OAOAST Women’s title. This could be your biggest challenge- CRYSTAL Hold on just a second! Do you know who you’re speaking to? I’m Crystal. Got that? JOSH I think so. CRYSTAL Crystal. Remember that. I’m still a former OAOAST world champion. Got that? JOSH Yes, ma’am. CRYSTAL I’m still a former 24/7 champion! I’m still an OAOAST legend! Do you not know that? Is that not something you can remember? JOSH I remember it very well! Don’t hurt me, please. CRYSTAL Shut up, you sniveling toad. Do you want to talk to me about challenges? Axel, Leon Rodez, Zack Malibu, that fat fool Hoff, I’ve fought them all! JOSH That’s very impressive. CRYSTAL It is impressive. Very impressive, I must say. And I crushed them all. I destroyed them all. When I slapped on the Crystaling they cried for mercy. Those were real challenges, Matthews. Is Morgan a challenge? I don’t think so. Morgan is a fluke. She’s a lucky little kid, but her luck has run out. She’s evaded everyone Josie has put in front of her. But I’m an obstacle that she just can’t ever get past. When Sunday rolls around I’m going to get that Women’s Title from her, I’m going to give Josie some peace of mind, and I’m also going to retire with that title. And not only that, Matthews. I’ll retire as the greatest female performer this company has ever seen. From out of nowhere… MORGAN NERDLY stands in front of Crystal. CRYSTAL Can I help you with something? Morgan shakes, a sure sign of her nervousness and timidity MORGAN Um, no. I..I…I..well, maybe I should go. JOSH Go ahead, Morgan. CRYSTAL Yeah, go ahead, Morgan. Say it. MORGAN (mumbling) Umm….well, Sorry this is Kind of hard. I didn’t…I didn’t survive six trips to a mental hospital for you…to…um…for me to become another statstic on your hall of fame plaque! And um….that’s great that you can list all those people you beat, but…you’ve never beat me. And…and…and….you never will. CRYSTAL What? MORGAN (mumbling) You never will. CRYSTAL What? MORGAN You never will! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans cheer as Morgan nervously scurries away, mumbling to herself. CRYSTAL We’ll see. Yes, we’ll see. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted March 26, 2010 We return to ringside with 2010 Anderson Cup champions Chicks Over Dicks already in the ring. "C-O-D! C-O-D! C-O-D!" KRISTA Rio Rancho! “YEAAAAAAAAAAA!” KRISTA Welcome to the dog house! CROWD KRISTA Uh….I’m sorry…I uh….I don’t know where that came from. But I do know where Spencer Reiger came from. You see he spawned from the demonic, beast infested, hell hole that is his mother’s womb. That’s your cue to laugh, by the way. CROWD KRISTA My they learn fast these days. Spencer Reiger, we realize there are five members of the Moneygang but its you who’s worthy of an emasculating promo that puts you out the OAOAST and leaves you offering annomyous handjobs for donuts at seedy truck stations. Don’t ask me why you’d do it for donuts. You’re the dumb ass not me. “Sympathy for the Devil” cues up to numerous boos from the Rio Rancho faithful. Stepping out onto the arena floor, in a white suit, is Theodore Moneymaker. KRISTA I see God has decided he wants to ruin my life a little early. "MONEYMAKER SUCKS! MONEYMAKER SUCKS! MONEYMAKER SUCKS!" MONEYMAKER Krista, Alix greetings to you both. I won't waste anytime with preamble or my usual self important talk. I only came out here today because I wanted to apologize to you personally. ALIX Apologize? Dude, for what? MONEYMAKER For this…. Suddenly Alix is thrown to the ground by a beltshot to the back of the head from CMJ! “BOOOOOOOOOOO!”’ Krista sees her downed lover, and immediately charges at CMJ. A lariat brings him to the ground, and brightens the crowd’s sprits. But Krista can’t continue her torrid attack due to Spencer Reiger clobbering her from behind. “MONEYGANG SUCKS! MONEYGANG SUCKS! MONEYGANG SUCKS!” As CMJ barks at the crowd to be silent, and waves his belt to taunt them, Reiger grabs onto Krista’s hair and yanks her to her feet. Beyond the ring, Lorelei DeCenzo marches down the ramp, holding two dresses suited for a pair of grandmothers. As she slides into the ring Reiger hits the Reiger counter on Krista! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” the fans hiss as Krista goes lifeless from the deadly finisher. The audience is further enraged to see CMJ and Reiger take the dresses from Lorelei and dress them on the prone bodies of Chicks Over Dicks! Smiles are brought to the Moneygang’s face as Theodore Moneymaker stands at the top of the entrance stage bellowing with a mighty laughter. COLE Disgusting! What’s the meaning of this? Why put Alix in Krista in such..such..such plain dresses? COACH They’re the queens of fashion, always looking fine on the red carpet. Now they look plain Jane, and they certainly don’t look very tough or very good. Lorelei raises the hands the hands of the Moneygang as their smiles expand even wider. This outrages the sold out fanbase and the more incensed members of the fans bathe the ring in debris. Moneymaker, for his part, remains isolated on the entrance stage thoroughly enjoying the humliation that has been brought to Chicks Over Dicks. COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted March 26, 2010 Master Blaster jams into the arena as Denzel Spencer sets off green and yellow pyrotechnics. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen the following eight person bout is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of sixty minutes! Introducing first….From Montego Bay, Jamaica... weighing two hundred, twenty five pounds. The OAOAST HEARTLAND CHAMPION... DDEEEEEENNZZZZZZEEEEEEELLLLLL... SSSSSPPPEEEEEENNCCCEEEEEEERRRRRRRRR!!!! Denzel slides into the ring and showcases his Heartland title to the roaring audience. COLE All eight men in the Money In The Bank contest at Anglemania will be competing in this match, including Alfdogg who qualified at a non-televised event on Wednesday. The Wall by Kansas comes to life as the entry way fills with blue lights and matching smoke. Entrance doors shred apart bringing out the intimidating twosome of ThunderKid, Sandman. They stand tall and proud atop the entrance stage, unaffected by the jeers and taunts that swell around them. ThunderKid wears black bicycle tights with white lightening bolts down the side, and matching black boots and elbow pads. Sandman wears his traditional garb of bandanas, black sweatpants and a white sleeveless Deadly Alliance shirt. BUFFER First from Green Bay, Wisconsin, he is a former United States and tag team champion….THUNDERKIIIIDDDDDDDD! And his partner, a former Heartland Champion, he is from South Of Heaven, THE SAAAAAANDMAAAAAAAAN! “BOOOOOOOOO!” Magnum Opus begins playing, causing the lights to fade into a darkness. The arena stays under this erry blackness until the opening beats of the song kick in. Then a metalliac gold light hangs with forboding presence over the entrance way. It heralds the arrival of Alfdogg, who receives an explosive reception from the capacity crowd. BUFFER And their final partner…from Anderson, Indiana he weighes two hundred thirty seven pounds….he is a three time OAOAST world champion…ALFDOOGGGGGGGGGGG! The gold light cloaks Alf on his way down to ringside, as the former world champion holds his head high in self importance. He then enters the ring, brushing past the disdainful stares of ThunderKid and Sandman to settle in front of the main camera. His arms flare out to his sides, he drops to one knee, and a pyro wall comes to life behind him. COLE Now that’s an entrance! Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum (Jesus Walks) God show me the way because the Devil trying to break me down (Jesus Walks with me) The only thing that that I pray is that my feet don't fail me now (Jesus Walks) And I don't think there is nothing I can do now to right my wrongs (Jesus Walks with me) I want to talk to God but I'm afraid because we ain't spoke in so long Green and yellow lights fall across the neon entrance stage, while Kanye West’s smash hit “Jesus Walks” comes through the speakers. Wearing black slacks and a navy blazer, a smug Christian Wright emerges from the entrance way. At his side stands the equally confident and snobbish, Lorelei DeCenzo. The two Enterprise members hook arms and travel down the entrance ramp with noses held high as green pyro explodes at the side of the stage. BUFFER And the opponents… Now entering ringside, accompanied by Lorelei DeCenzo, he weighs 8 1/3 bars of gold, from Washington DC, he is THE GOD CHILD….CHRISTIAN WRIIIIGHTTTTT! Wright and Lorlei take up position at ringside, both discussing strategy and mocking the poor Rio Rancho audience. There’s a lot to mock. 3 Doors Down’s ode to the army “Citizen Soldiers” hits, and Baron Windells and Tim Cash storm through the entrance doors with purpose and intent. Behind the duo is Melody Nerdly, clad in daisy duke shorts and flannel top, warming up the audience and stirring their passions. Yes I’m reusing an entrance, leave me alone. BUFFER from Peoria, Illionois, he is Gentleman Tim Cash! And his partner he hails from San Antonio, Texas, he is The Lonestar Gunslinger….BARON WINDELLS! Accompanied by Melody Nerdly, they are…..CITIZEN SOLDIERS! Not at all happy with the selection of his partners, Wright keeps his distance from Cash and Windels, His revulsion continues to worsen when he hears the following song…. "THE CHAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMP..." *DUN DUN* "...IS..." *DUN* "...HERE!" BOOOOM! A lightening bolt hits the entrance, electrifying the audience as the fan favorite PRL tears out the back. Smoke fills the entry way but just as soon at it forms its shredded apart by the roving figure of The Latin Lion. BUFFER From San Juan, Puerto Rico weighing in at two hundred twenty pounds he comes in as a former OAOAST world champion, a former 24/7 champion, and a former X Division Champion. He is THE GREAT ONE, THE LATIN LION, THA PUERTO RICAN! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Tim Cash, Baron Windells, Christian Wright, PRL Vs TK, Sandman, Alfdogg, and Denzel Spencer COLE A very odd position for Alfdogg to be in, teaming with his former Deadly Alliance teammates. I’m sure he doesn’t appreciate Josie’s selecting of the teams! Folks, we’ll be back with this exciting match! COMMERCIAL Back live on HeldDOWN Baron Windells is steam rolling through Sandman with powerful lariats! Sandman attempts to reach out towards his corner, but a pair of stomps keeps that plan halted. Windells lifts Sandman off the canavs in order to throw him into neutral corner. Sandman hits with such force that his entire body is propelled back towards the center of the ring. This allows Windells to snap him inside a front facelock. The crowd is brought to their feet by the sight of the Brigham Young Cocktail (leaping DDT!) A pinfall is quickly attempted by The Lonestar Gunslinger… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! But TK arrives into the ring to break up the pinfall with a kick to BW’s back. Windels and the fans have a few words for TK as the Green Bay native slinks back to his team’s corner. As the fans continue to taunt TK, BW comes to his feet and drops a series of elbows onto his foe’s stomach. COLE Two great all star teams here in Rio Rancho, and a lot of animosity between many of these men. Windels scrapes Sandman off the canvas with the aid of a front facelock. He then drags him across the ring, where Christian Wright is able to apply a tag. “BOOOOOOOOOOOO!” “SILENCE!” Wright chides the audience for their disdain. Unfortunately for him, his distraction with the audience allows Sandman to begin elbowing him in the stomach. However, Sandman’s flurry of offense doesn’t last long. Wright is able to throw him into the canvas with a lethal snap powerslam. Referee Earl Hebner drops into position to score the pinfall… ONE! TWO! Sandman brings his shoulder off the canvas to the delight of a relived ThunderKid. He’s quickly brought to his feet by The God Child. However, Wright preens and postures allowing Sandman a moment of recovery. This regained strength allows him to rake the eyes of his snooty opponent. With Wright stunned, Sandman is able to make a crucial escape to his corner. There he suceeds in tagging in ThunderKid. The DA member struts across the ring to blast his foe in the chest with hard forearms. But CW is eventually able to block the attack pattern and returns fire with European uppercuts. The blows stagger TK and force him back towards the center of the ring. There he’s trapped inside an arm wringer, and brought down with tremendous force with a single arm DDT. While TK clutches his sore limb, Wright retreats to his corner to apply a tag with Tim Cash. COLE Wrestling’s last real good guy on his way into this affair. Cash takes aim at his opponent with a pair of jabs that weaken TK against the corner. Timmy then does the nice thing and answers BW’s call for a tag. The fans salute the arrival of BW with hearty cheers. He doesn’t disappoint them as he lays into the former US champion with brutal stomps to the stomach. Once done with his attacks, BW scrapes TK away from the corner. He then shoots him into the ropes, in order to flourish forward and connect with a beautiful lariat on TK’s rebound. With sore chest in mind, TK rolls over onto his stomach. But this leaves him open to a knee drop that connects perfectly with his skull. As he whimpers his miserey, BW grabs onto his leg for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Alfdogg of all people breaks up the pinfall! This surprises the audience, who assumed he’d just as soon let TK lose the match. What doesn’t surprise them, however, is that he drags TK across the ring merely to tag himself into the contest. “YEAAAAAAAA!” Despite having his pin broken up, BW offers a respective nod to the OAOAST legend. The two brawlers then get down to business, trading powerful right hands that teeter them both. On the verge of losing the brawling war, Alfdogg stuns BW with an arm drag. BW tries to quickly scurry upright, but Alf holds him down with an armbar. COACH I gotta sit through this junk? Two men who don’t deserve to be in the money in the bank match. COLE Don’t deserve? You’ve clearly gone mad. Both these men are two of the finest competitors in the OAOAST. Windels manages to fight his way upright, no easy task given the treatment Alf’s given him. He begins using his free hand to pound away at Alf, and eventually secures his freedom. With Alf dazed for the moment, BW shoots himself into the ropes. On his return, he misses with a lariat, but delights the crowd by connecting with a bommerang lariat! COLE Myspace Comeback! Alf comes back to his feet, with his hand protecting his sore head. BW makes the mistake of attempting to remove this shield, and pays for it with a flesh rending knife edge chop that puts BW on his back. COLE The best in the business, unquestionably. Alf makes a cover attempt… ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Alf drags BW up with the aid of a front facelock. A vertical suplex attempt is easily blocked by Windels, who then executes a shocking suplex of his own! Exhausted from the rough exchange, Windels decides to crawl to his corner and apply the tag with Cash. The good guy of the OAOAST enters the ring to pepper the former world champion with left jabs. Alf throws out a lariat in his defense, but misses entirely. This allows Cash to connect with a side Russian leg sweep to counter. Pleased with his performance, Cash gracefully bows out to PRL! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans chant as PRL takes a moment to SNIFF~! the air! PRL begins unleashing his legendary Rock style punches on Alf, snapping the Indiana native’s head to and fro like a tennis ball. But Alf once again uses a knife edge chop to shut down his opponent’s series of attacks. PRL remains dazed as Alf bounces off the ropes. The 3 time world champion returns to strike down his old rival with a running elbow. A pin attempt is then made…. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! “Do better than that, Alf!” TK mocks his partner on the outside. Alf shouts back at his former friend, leading to a heated argument between the two. But the barking comes to a sudden end thanks to a school boy by PRL… ONE! TWO! Alf kicksout! “YEAAAAAAAAAA!” Alf is to his feet remarkably quickly, and lashes out with a spinning elbow. But PRL counters with a kick to the gut and stuns Alf, literally, with The Cappa Killer! COLE From out of nowhere! PRL falls back into his corner where Christian Wright makes a wise tag. The Wright enters the ring to find Alf back on his feet with alarming speed once more. CW pushes himself off the ropes in an effort to take Alf down. But the former world champion strides forward and catches his rival inside a sleeper hold. However, The God Child quickly counters with another stunner to Alf’s sore jaw! Feeling his oats, Wright rushes to his opponent’s corner and drags Denzel Spencer into the ring. COLE Now what is this? What is Christian Wright thinking? “I quarrel with you, good sir!” Wright shouts to Denzel as he begins smashing his chest with European Uppercuts. The God Child then ends the procession of uppercuts in order to attempt an irish whip. But Denzel reverses the hold and pulls Wright in close for a short arm knee strike! Leaving Wright hunched over and bone weary, Denzel pushes himself to the ropes. But as he comes back Wright returns to life and upends him with the Wright Off (sky high)! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” No pin may be attempted however, thanks to ThunderKid rushing into the ring and kicking Wright in the back of the head. TK turns to Alf and shouts, “That’s how you do it, Alfdo…” But he’s interrupted by a running bulldog from PRL! The Latin Lion pauses to sniff the air once more and the audience erupts with cheers. “PRL! PRL! PRL! PRL!” COLE They love The Latin Lion here in Rio Rancho, and what’s not to love? COACH Everything. COLE Folks, we’ll be back with more of this matchup after this! COMMERCIAL Returning from break we find Sandman with the advantage over Tim Cash, holding down the good guy with a chin lock. Cash’s teammates, aside from Wright, root him on, urging him to hold strong. While on the opposite end of the ring, TK barks for a quick submission. “TIMMY! TIMMY! TIMMY!” the audience sings, providing the strength Cash needs to begin fighting out the hold. COLE So much animosity exists between these two men. I bet Sandman is trying to rip Cash’s head off! COACH I can’t blame him for trying. Thanks to the great support of Rio Rancho, Cash is able to make his way upright. He breaks free of Sandy’s hold, and thanks the capacity crowd for their acts of kindess. Unfortunatley, being a good guy does not pay off at this moment; Sandman brings Cash to the ground with a surprise flapjack. COACH I love it! A pinfall attempt is made by Sandman… ONE! TWO! Cash brings his shoulder off the canvas, easing the hearts of his nervous team. Annoyed with not getting a three count, Sandman makes a begrudging tag to Denzel Spencer. “YEAAAAAAAAAAA!” Denzel celebrates his more normal arrival into the contest with some carribeian dancing, before getting down to business. He grabs onto Cash’s arm and throws his rival into the corner. He then charges in after him and takes to the skies to hit a devastating body splash! Cash stumbles out the corner, the punishment he’s taken wearing on his face. That look is replaced by one of compelete blankness as Denzel takes him down with an axe kick! COLE Oh my! What a strike! And what a beating Tim Cash has taken in just a few moments at the hands of Denzel Spencer? COACH Nothing but what that sucka ass sucka deserves, Mikey. Just wish it was a cooler cat to deliver it to him. Denzel hooks the legs for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Cash finds the strength and the will to push himself out the pinfall. As he begins to slowly come to his feet, Denzel takes off into the ropes. He returns with another axe kick. But this time its Cash scoring with an enziguri! The Heartland Champion flips over to the canvas, brought down by the beautiful attack of Cash. His team begs him for a tag, all except CW, who seems uninterested in the proceedings. “Jesus! Can’t you do any better than that?” TK barks at Denzel, earning him a stern stare of admonishment from Alfdogg. Meanwhile both men make a crawl to their corners, the fans rooting them both on in their journey. Their exhausted bodies are allowed to rest for the time being as tags are made to Wright and Alfdogg. “Very well, if I must.” Wright bemoans his fate. However, his luck is far better than he expected as he’s able to overpower Alf with his European uppercuts. An irish whip attempt is reserved, but Wright earns the last laugh with a snap powerslam that gains a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Alf makes a timely kickout! “ALF IS GOD! ALF IS GOD! ALF IS GOD!” Wright turns furious eyes onto the audience, “I am The God Child!” Wright makes Alf pay for the audience’s transgressions with a painfull inverted atomic drop. As Alf is hobbled by the attack, Wright measures him up and takes him down with a nasty European uppercut. COACH Man, look at the way Christian Wright is using them things tonight. He’s just lighting boys up! “Your frog splash shalt be your doom!” Wright informs Alf to a chorus of jeers. His loafers carry him up to the top rope where he seeks to bring upon his prediction. Without wasting a second of time he flies forward with the Frog Splash! But Alf has the wits about him to move out the way! Wright crashes stomach first into the rock solid canvas and howls in misery. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” The fans delight may be expanded even further as Alf grabs onto Wright’s legs and begins setting up for the Sharpshooter! “SHARPSHOOTER! SHARPSHOOTER! SHARPSHOOTER!” But disappointment is all the audience will find as Wright succeeds in sucking Alfdogg down into a pinfall effort… ONE! TWO! Alf finds his way out the troubling pinfall, and regains hold of Wright’s legs! “YEAAAAAAAAA!” The sharpshooter is fully executed as Wright is turned over onto his stomach. The audience rises to their feet, fully expecting the end of CW’s unbeaten streak. The God Child shrieks in agony, and desperately reaches out for the ring cables. But the closer he gets to salvation the tighter the hold becomes until he can move no further. COLE He’s going to tap, Coach! He has to tap! I just don’t see how he can survive much longer. He doesn’t have to as PRL rescues him with a dropkick to Alf’s back! Alf is forced to let go of CW, much to the fans’ chagrin. To Alf’s chagrin PRL traps him inside a front facelock in set up of the PR Nightmare! But before the finisher can even be executed The PR Menace is sent flying over the top rope by a lariat from ThunderKid! “I just saved your ass.” TK chuckles at Alfdogg. COLE Folks, we will be back with more of this great matchup on HeldDOWN~! COMMERCIAL We return from break with Sandman battering at PRL’s skull with mounted punches. “P-R-L! P-R-L! P-R-L!” Through with pounding at PRL’s skull, Sandman leaves the wounded superstar behind and makes a tag to ThunderKid. The audience does not receive ThunderKid very well, pestering him with jeers. He pays them little attention as he strikes his thunderbolt boots into PRL’s knee. COACH This has turned into a handicap match since commercial, dudes is straight ethering PRL and for once I feel safe with that fool ass around. TK grabs onto PRL’s leg and snaps it to the side, causing the former world champion a great deal of anguish. TK then grabs onto the leg and twists and torques it, sending screams through PRL’s throat. “Give up!” TK demands. Despite the pain, PRL snaps back, “Go to hell!” “P-R-L! P-R-L! P-R-L!” the fans sing led on by Tim Cash and Melody. Not wanting to disappoint his Lightening Bolts with a submission loss, PRL begins fiercly fighting out TK’s leg trap. He uses his free foot to kick and wack at TK, doing only little to win his freedom. His efforts are then shut down by TK driving an elbow onto his bad leg. “P-R-L! P-R-L! P-R-L!” COLE Its been a tough several minutes for PRL. COACH And hopefully it gets tougher! Let’s see someone snap his ankle. Alfdogg may do just that as he makes a blind tag with ThunderKid. The two men get into each other’s face and spew hateful diatribes at the other. Thankfully for their team, the referee comes between them and calls for a separation. Free of ThunderKid’s annoyances, Alfdogg is able to wrap PRL up inside a leg lock. COLE Two OAOAST legends going at it, live on HeldDOWN days before Anglemania. Once again a pained PRL must put his free leg to use. He uses it to batter Alf with ferocious kicks to the head. Eventually they do enough to cause Alf to break the leg lock entirely. But PRL isn’t in the clear yet, as Alfdogg begins pulling him to his feet. However, Alf and the fans are taken for a shock when The People’s Champion hits Alf with his second Cappa Killer! COLE Again from out of nowhere! PRL’s team calls for an urgent and much needed tag. However with a wounded leg, movement is a difficult prospect for PRL. Stubborn to the last, PRL fights to his feet but refuses to make the tag with his partners. Instead he goes toe to toe with Alfdogg, trading blows with the OAOAST legend. COACH Selfish, selfish, selfish. That’s all PRL is. He’s just in it for the glory! PRL begins gaining the upperhand with his Rock style punches. He sniffs the electricity in the air once more before throwing a haymaker Alf’s way. But Alf ducks the wild attack and grabs hold of PRL’s waist. From there he bridges backwards and sends PRL crashing to the canvas with a belly to belly overhead suplex. “ALF!” “PRL!” “ALF!” “PRL!” COLE An audience divided here in Rio Rancho. Both men command tremendous respect from the OAOAST Galaxy. Alf dives on top of PRL’s prone body for the pinfall… ONE! TWO! PRL summons up the strength to power out the pinfall. This earns a mini temper tantrum from TK, who blames Alf for failing to secure a crucial pinfall. COLE What did TK expect? You’re dealing with a former world champion. They aren’t easy to keep down. Alf attempts to slap on the sharpshooter to great fanfare from the sold out audience. But PRL will not tolerate being locked into certain defeat and furiously kicks at Alf. With much strength and much luck, he succeeds in kicking Alfdogg back to his corner. There Sandman makes a blind tag that does not endear him to his one time associate. Entering into the ring, Sandman spears Baron Windells off the ring apron! Tim Cash complains about this questionable tactic to the referee. Unfortunately for him his complaints earn him a straight left hand from Sandy. Wizened after these brutal attacks, Wright merely hops off the apron and takes up position at Lorelei’s applauding side. COLE What cowardice. “Discretion is the better part of valor!” Lorelei shouts at the judgmental announcer. Sandman picks PRL up by the bad leg. PRL reaches backwards, expecting to be able to make a tag with somebody. Yet there is no somebody available, as all men have been forced to vacate the premises one way or another. With PRL left by his lonesome Sandman cracks a small smile at his miserable fate. But that smile is quickly erased by an enziguri from The People’s Champ! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans explode as Sandman timbers over to the canvas. COLE But there’s no one there for PRL to tag! Seizing on an opportunistic moment, Wright leaps onto the ring apron. “A hero has arrived!” he shouts to a downpour of boos. PRL stands up, gazes at a man proclaiming to be his savoir and…..GIVES HIM THE FINGER! WRIGHT “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Spurred on by the cheers of the Lightening Bolts, PRL hobbles forward and takes Sandman off his feet with a thunderous lariat! ThunderKid then enters the ring and meets with a similar fate. Although reluctantly, Alfdogg steps into the ring to challenge PRL. But he’s thrown over by a Rock style belly to belly suplex. No sooner than he hits the ground does Denzel take to the air with a cross body block! But he’s taken out the skies by a dropkick from PRL! COLE Where is he getting this strength from? COACH Bad booking. Coach’s spirits are lifted by quite a wide margin when TK accosts PRL with clubbing forearms. He quickly hooks him inside a front facelock and wastes no time in driving him downwards with the Thunderbolt DDT! PRL’s head is snapped against the ground and his body goes almost lifeless from the attack. On Sandman’s orders, TK attempts a pinfall…. ONE! TWO! Baron Windells returns to break up the pinfall! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Suddenly PRL’s entire team, minus Christian Wright floods into the ring. A lariat from Tim Cash sends both he and Alfdogg tumbling out the ring! As soon as each man hits the ground they promptly spring to their feet and resume trading blows. This leaves them open to any sort of aerial attack. Its Denzel Spencer who comes through with the high flying theatrics as he wipes out both men with a no hands plancha! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans cheers die down considerably as Sandman and TK leap out the ring to begin raining down wild punches upon the fun loving Jamacian. COLE They’ve jumped their own teammate! As odd as that may have been its nowhere near as odd as Christian Wright cracking PRL across the skull with a steel chair! PRL topples over to the canvas, all the life ripped from his body. Wright towers over him, offering him a stern lecture on proper teamwork etiquette. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” DING DING DING HAHAHAAH PATTY FUCKED YA’LL OVER! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the referee has ruled this match a no contest! The fans are irate and toss up loud and genuine hatred. The scene is one of utter chaos as a brawl has erupted on the outside between Cash, Alf, Spencer and the Deadly Alliance. In the ring Christian his commandeered a microphone, which only further outrages the audience. WRIGHT From this day forth, I defiantly vow... no man, woman nor beast shall commit thine self- BARON HITS THE BRIGHAM YOUNG COCKTAIL DDT~!!!~~!!!! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans sing their glee as Wright is finally silenced. COACH Uncalled for! Windells takes to the top rope where he basks in the outpouring of appreciative cheers from the sold out audience. He claps his hands in triumph and promises to the fans that he will bring home the Money In The Bank briefcase and then the world title. COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted March 26, 2010 Whenever the world famous interview stage is around you know Tony Brannigan is near. It's no different this week. The OAOAST Original perched at his usual spot. BRANNIGAN This Sunday night is AngleMania IX live exclusively on pay-per-view. Among the many exciting bouts you'll see that night is a Sin City Street Fight between the Heavenly Rockers and Team Heyross. Not only will it be the first Sin City Street Fight take place in Sin City itself, Las Vegas, it also marks the return of Quentin Benjamin to the ring since his near fatal encounter with a fireball courtesy of Colonel Abdullah Nerdly. At this time I'd like to introduce my guest this week, one-half of Team Heyross... CHARLIE MOSS! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Moss acknowledges the crowd as he makes his way to the stage. BRANNIGAN Charlie Moss, big win over Logan Mann earlier this week on OAOAST Syndicated, but I know it'll pale in comparsion to a Team Heyross victory at AngleMania. MOSS To borrow a phrase, the clock is ticking. Quentin and I have been itching to get our hands on the Heavenly Rockers and their chicken manager Colonel Abdullah. Everybody I've talked to the past week has asked if we're ready for the hostile crowd that'll be on hand. My answer's been ask the Heavenly Rockers because they're in for a rude awakening if they expect to be greeted as returning heroes. And if the fans don't give it to them... we will. Quentin's been rehabbing every day for this moment and you can bet it'll be anything but a homecoming for the Heavenly Rockers. "Shine" cues and Moss exits. BRANNIGAN Like the Heavenly Rockers last week, Charlie Moss short and sweet with his remarks. What a war it's gonna be at AngleMania. COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted March 26, 2010 Backstage we go as Terry Taylor peeks inside the dressing of COD. Through the crack we see Krista pacing uncontrollably while clutching the granny dress put on her earlier, Alix’s attempts to calm her down unsuccessful. * KNOCK, KNOCK * ALIX & KRISTA TAYLOR Guys, it’s me. Can I get a word? KRISTA TAYLOR Krista charges forward and drags Terry in. KRISTA Didn’t your mother always tell you to be a good egg? TAYLOR (strained) Yes. KRISTA Obviously CMJ and Spencer weren’t told because they turned out rotten. First they try to cut our hair. And now tonight they force their grandmother’s wardrobe on us?!? Either they have some twisted GILF fantasy they wish to play out or they’re trying to get us to crack hours before the tag title match at AngleMania. TAYLOR Psychological warfare in other words? Krista gags Terry with the granny dress. KRISTA I’m banking on the former because everybody who’s tried to make us crack has failed. ALIX Except for that one time, but that was eons ago. KRISTA But you know, everybody has a fantasy. ALIX Future Mrs. Krista Isadora Duncan! KRISTA My fantasy used to involve throwing Ned off a moving train, but now that we’re on speaking terms again I don’t want to anymore. So I came up with a new fantasy. ALIX Me, you, Academy Award-winner Charlize Theron, supermodel Alessandra Ambrosio, Maggie Gyllenhaal and pre-milkaholic Lindsay engaged in a wild sunset beach orgy? KRISTA Oh, that does sound nice… but no. I fantasize about CMJ and Spencer Reiger in dresses! And with AngleMania taking place in the gambling capital of the world, it only makes sense to put up a little wager. So why don’t we have the loser wear a dress for 30 days? According to the LDC Moneygang, we don’t stand a chance anyway. They might as well amuse us by accepting the wager. (glances at Terry) It looks like you have something to say. Do you? Terry nods and Krista removes the dress from his mouth. TAYLOR I’m told my colleague Tony Brannigan has tracked the LDC Moneygang down. Let’s go to him right now. We cut to Brannigan with the LDCMG and Theodore Moneymaker backstage where their limo awaits. BRANNIGAN You guys heard what COD had to say. Your response? REIGER You mad COD? All we did was make sure you came looking your best for our date at AngleMania. The LDCMG and Moneymaker laugh. CMJ As far as their challenge goes, you damn right were accept. It adds intrigue to a foregone conclusion. And when our hands are raised in victory, not only will COD have to wear something more their age… they’ll have to step into the kitchen and cook us a nice hot meal. MONEYMAKER How do you guys like your steaks? CMJ Medium rare. REIGER I prefer well done. Just like COD will be done at AngleMania. MONEYMAKER Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted March 26, 2010 Our scene is a… PARKING LOT. Entering the lot is Mister Dick, clad in a green tank top and jeans. Anger fills his face, and his knuckles are taped. He’s clearly ready for a fight. MISTER DICK Reject! Reject! Wear ya at, boy? You wanna see if I got balls? I’m about to slap them across yerr face, son! Mister Dick looks around furiously, his eyes demanding Reject’s appearance. MISTER DICK Come on! Come out, ya yellow tailed piece a trash! From the opening door of a Mercedes Benz REJECT appears. REJECT Hi, Jock. Glad to you see actually showed up. I guess I’ve got to hand it you, buddy. MISTER DICK I ain’t yer buddy. REJECT You do indeed have balls. But I have friends. MISTER DICK What do you mea- Before Mister Dick can even finish his thought, he’s struck in the back with a kendo stick by Sandman! Mister Dick crumples to the floor, leaving ThunderKid able to plant a nasty kick into his midsection. REJECT You never learn, Jock! This is your fault, you did this to yourself! Your blood is on your own hands, not mine! Elsewhere Arturas has barred the door, preventing any help from coming to Mister Dick. The rest of the Deadly Alliance then pummels The Human Hard On with brutal stomps, rendering him a bloody carcass. REJECT Through the window! Put him through the window! Now! THUNDERKID You're the boss. Smiles appear on Sandman and TK’s face as they bring a dazed and wounded MD to his feet. Without hesitation or thoughts to their conscience, they throw Mister Dick forward and send his head crashing through the Benz’s driver side window! MD’s body goes limp with pain as the pack of dogs hovers around him. Reject leans closest and shouts his bile into MD’s face. REJECT You will respect me! You will respect me! You will respect me! FADE OUT Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted March 26, 2010 ~OAOAST Anglemania~ OAOAST WORLD TITLE: REJECT Vs MISTER DICK OAOAST TAG TEAM TITLES CHICKS OVER DICKS VS LDC MONEYGANG OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP MORGAN NERDLY VS CRYSTAL OAOAST SIX MAN TITLES CUCARACHA KINGDOM VS NATE BLACK AND THE LAST KINGS OF SCOTLAND NON TITLE AFFAIRS SIN CITY STREET FIGHT THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS VS TEAM HEYROSS EIGHT MAN MONEY IN THE BANK LADDER MATCH VINNY VALENTINE VS BIFF ATLAS THIS SUNDAY! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
