PROMO: Like Mac

[Guest Ash Ketchum]

...

 

 

"Fault."

 

The room of Ash Ketchum is quiet... TOO QUIET. We see through the eyes of Ash Kethcum, it seems, who is watching TV as Misty walks into the room. More importantly, he is watching... tennis? Wimbledon? Is our hero really THAT bored? And what is up with the confused look on Misty's face?

 

Misty: What the hell is wrong with you? Did you have another near-death experience with a toilet?

 

Cut out to a shot of Ash, wearing a... sweater vest? And drinking Pepsi Twist from a tea cup, WITH the pinky extended out and up to look fancy? Hey, I'm as confused as you are, people!

 

Ash: I'm being British, love.

 

Misty: What?

 

Ash: I'm being British. See? I have the tea cup, I'm watching tennis, and I'm wearing a sweater vest. Notice the British flag behind me, and the 8 by 10 framed glossy of the Queen. Yes, I am quite British. I even have a royal guard bobble-head, old chap.

 

Misty stares at him, quite angry, yet confused at the moment. She thinks back to right before the PPV...

 

-[FLASHBACK]-

 

Right before Snake Eyes, Misty returns from a long day of shopping. She carries her bags as she hums a song to herself, stepping through the door she just opened.

 

Misty: Ash, I'm back!

 

Coming out of the next room is Ash, dressed up exactly like a smaller version of the HVille Thugg.

 

Ash: Yo, what up, woman? Where my homies at, dawg? I'm about to get nasty on the flipside, baby! WESTSIDE!

 

-[/FLASHBACK]-

 

Misty: Oh God... not again.

 

Ash: Not again, love?

 

Misty: Can the accent.

 

*silence*

 

Ash: Fine.

 

Misty: Now what could compell you to act British?

 

Ash sighs and takes a deep breath in to explain the story behind the situation.

 

Ash: I... I wanted to be like Edwin. Successful like him. I wanted to be cool like him. I even thought I might have to dress like him...

 

Ketchum reaches over on the couch, grabbing what appears to be a small garage remote and pressing it. The doors of the near-by closet open, revealing a suit similat to Edwin's.

 

Bright red camouflage-style trousers? Check.

 

T-shirt emblazoned with a union jack? Check.

 

Ladder laced Doc Martens? Check.

 

Pair of mirrored sunglasses? Check.

 

Trademark sleeveless red vinyl trenchcoat? Check. It's all there.

 

Misty kinda stares in awe, and possibly in a bit of fear that Ash would go to these extremes. She sighs pretty deeply and loudly, then turns around to face her boyfriend again.

 

Misty: Ash... you are a two-time Hardcore Champion, the only man to ever hold a JL and WF title simultaneously, and a general wrestling legend. You are successful. You are funny. You're a lot like Edwin aleady in your own little way.

 

Ash: Yeah, but...

 

Misty: BUT WHAT?

 

Ash: Maybe... maybe the funniness has nothing to do wit it. Look at Davey Boy Smith, The British Bulldog. He was my cousin, Misty. He was British. He was successful. (Ash pauses for a second as he goes into speech mode.) Dynamite Kid... Ultimate Warrior... William Regal... all successful, too. All British. See a connection here?

 

Misty and Ash just sit in silence as Ash reaches over for a donut from the donut box across the table from him.

 

Misty: Donuts aren't British...

 

Ash: Yeah... but I didn't say I was going to EXACTLY copy British culture and Edwin...

 

Ketchum takes a huge bite out of his donut.

 

Misty: Yes... but why do you have to be like Edwin?

 

Ash(muffled): Mmm mmmmm mm m mmmmmmm, mm, mmm.

 

Misty: What?

 

Ash swallows his donut and repeats his remark.

 

Ash: I want to be successful, too, Misty. I want to be World Champ-

 

Misty: And you will be in time. I didn't fall in love with a British wrestler or someone who tried to be something he's not. (Her eyes begin to water up.) I fell in love... with someone who was... themselves...

 

Misty sniffs as a small tear runs down her cheek. Of course, Ash now feels like a total jerk and he gets up out of his seat to apologize.

 

Ash: You're right. I'm sorry. I just need to be and let Pokemania carry me to the top.

 

Misty: That's the Ash I love.

 

Misty smiles again, then notices one more thing that needs to change...

 

Misty(pointing to the sweater vest): But that has to go. NOW.

 

Ash winks at Misty as he clenches the neck of the vest and pulling, tears it in half down the middle as if he were Hulk Hogan. Misty's eyes open wide as Ash finishes tearing the sweater vest in two.

 

Misty: That's not what I had in mind... but you wanna go get some ice cream?

 

Ash's head perks up as he hears "ice cream." He grins happily.

 

Ash: ICE CREAM? I LOVE ICE CREAM! YOU BET! TO THE MACH FIVE ON THE DOUBLE!

 

Ash and Misty take off, slamming the door behind them as they run down the hall like two playful kids toward their ride. Misty giggles as Ash smiles, the young girl trying to catch up to Ash.

 

Misty: Ash, I want a double scoop, one peppermint, the other cherry, covered in butterscotch and sprinkles!

 

Ash stops and looks back at Misty, raising an eyebrow in disgust and surprise.

 

Ash: Girl, this pregnancy's starting to affect your taste for food...

 

Fade to black...

[Guest Muzz]

I wish I hadn't read that. The ego is strong with this one.

[Guest kelloggs]

Strong you say his ego is Muzz...

 

Well although Promo was...different...good job Ash still did...

 

Francis "Speaks like Yoda" M.

[Guest chirs3]

Does anyone know where the hell donuts came from? How do we know they're not British?

 

Promo? Oh right, promo! Nice one, Ashy. But you should've had color changing eye contacts too.

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

My god, it's Ashie Richards!

 

Different promo for sure, Ash. It lost me about halfway through, but then the rollercoaster car came back around and I fell into it and hit my head. Donuts.

[Guest Ace309]

Donuts are Dutch. They started when sea captains impaled fried dough cakes on the spikes on their ship steering wheel thingies. No, really.

 

And quite the interesting promo. Kind of takes all the fun out of mocking you over it now, though.

[Guest Ash Ketchum]

Who ever said anything about stopping with the mocking of how Ash wants to be like Edwin?