Guest mickberna Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 I read a couple Rock quotes from his heel days in another thread, and I figured, what the hell, it'd be nice to remember Rock when he was actually funny. Contribute, damnit!
Guest Austin3164life Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 "This ain't sing-a-long with the CHAMP!" "And then Billy Gunn, God himself spoke to you and said..."Bob"....."But my name's Billy--""IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!"
Guest Hitman Jebus Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 Something along the lines of: "Look at Mankind, he looks like a sack of abortion leftovers" or something like this that was much much funnier If you can, please tell me the exact quote...
Guest Insane Bump Machine Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 Don't know the exact quotes, but... "Look at Mankind, he looks like 8 pounds of monkey crap stuffed in a 4 pound bag." "Undertaker, please turn your 32 pound head backwards. Let it roll down your back and then catch it with your arms between your legs and stick it straight up your candy ass!"
Guest The Amazing Rando Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 my favorite FACE Rock quote was when he wrestled Angle in Pittsburgh and Angle grabbed a mic midmatch and said "why are you booing me...I was born right down the road in Mercy Hospital" and The Rock knocked him down...stole the mic...and screamed "IT DOESN'T MATTER WHERE YOU WERE BORN!" and Rock stomped him a few times
Guest y2jailbait Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 "Stop touching yourself!"-To Goldust "What do you do anyway?"-To Goldust "What is the matter with you? You Sick Freak!"-To Goldust The Rock-asking all the questions and saying all the things ive ever wanted to say to young Dustin Runnels
Guest The Amazing Rando Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 or during the Rock N Sock Connection days... (to the Dudleyz): I-I-I-I-It Doesn't Matter What Your Name Is!
Guest Insane Bump Machine Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 Jericho's debut: Rock: "After three boring minutes The Rock says KNOW YOUR ROLE AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH!....You come out here on the Rock's show and don't even have the class to introduce yourself? What is your name, Jabroni? Y2J: I told you I'm.. Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!"
Guest Hogan Made Wrestling Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 Rock Forgets His Catchphrase Promo. Followed DX's Corporation parody and goes something like this: ROCK: The Rock says, whatcha gonna do when the 24 inch pythons...no wait that's not it. This is it: to be the man - WHOOOOOO- you gotta beat...no that's not it. Oh wait this is it - Oh yeahhhhhhh, Dig i...oh damnit that's not it either. HHH: Don't worry yours is no better. ROCK: Oh this is it - I'm the best there is, the best there was, and the best...no wait that ain't it. That is definitely not it. THIS IS IT: THE MOST ELECTRIFYING LINE IN SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT TODAY, IF YOU SMELL WHAT THE ROCK IS COOKIN'!
Guest RickyChosyu Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 The stuff making fun of Big Show ("Lets see it from a different angle...") was hilarious, but a bit hard to re-create in text. Always a favorite: "Oh, and now Shane says it's gonna be no DQ? We've got Rock with no DQ, Shane with no IQ, Benoit with one tooth - never gonna be on the cover of GQ!" Again from the classic Billy-mocking incident: "(in whiny Billy voice) Well, my problem is: even though I won King of the Ring, everbody still thinks (in Rock voice) THAT I ABSOLUTELY SUCK!!!"
Guest Insane Bump Machine Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 To HHH: "Your wife, the 5 dollar...no...2 dollar...no...50 cents....no...buy two, get one free trashbag ho!" even more of the "God speaks to Billy Gunn" promo: "God: Yes Billy, you're right. You do suck. But there's one thing you can do. You must find the man who is simply electrifying. You must go find...The Rock! Billy (whiny voice): No please! Anybody but the Rock! God: KNOW YOUR ROLE AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH!"
Guest Strike Force! Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 Mine is real simple and to the point. "Know Your Role." That ALWAYS, WITHOUT FAIL, brought a smile to my face. Why doesn't he say it anymore?
Guest Insane Bump Machine Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 Why doesn't he say it anymore? Because he thinks that talking about Jonathan Coachman abusing cows in his spare time is funnier.
Guest Black Tiger Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 (To Billy Gunn) From the time your crappy music starts "Well I'm an asshole". My name is Kane, and I am a Roody Poo Candy Ass. (Whiny voice) For four years they held me down, for four years they kept me at the bottom of the barrel. (Rock voice) The rock says they didn' hold you down because you wanted to say goodbye to your Roody Poo friends in MSG, no they held you down because you ABSOLUTLY SUCK! (durring the empty arena match) Mankind how would you like a ...The Rock doesn't even know what this is. (during same match) Hey Chico, throw The Rock a Soda...Know Your Role. If WWE made a DVD of nothing but about 4 hours of Rock just talking his Smack and making fun of everyone, it'd sell like crazy.
Guest jester Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 A few Raws ago he said "Eric Jackoff or whatever his name is..."
Guest The Fett Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 "Big Show, the Rock would call you down to the ring right now, but he knows all you would say is <Rock growls like Chewbacca>"
Guest bob_barron Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 The Rock promo on HHH at Fully Loaded (the one Black Tiger had is hilarious) Also- the one he impersonated everyone in HIAC was hilarious.
Guest FeArHaVoC Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 Yeah, the one before HIAC when he talked about Austin pulling up in his black pick up truck with the BackStreet Boys playing.
Guest BobbyWhioux Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 I was always partial to: "Everybody wants to know The Rock's opinion on the Social Security Crisis..." "Everybody wants to know The Rock's opinion on the Paula Jones scandal..." And so on. When he was a heel champion, and doing The Corporate Elbow (instead of the People's Elbow), the crowd would try to "sing along along with the champ" and shout his catchphrase. Usually he'd say "This is not sing along with the champ" but once he got an almost Regal-esque look on his face and said, cooly, tensly, "Don't Do That." As is often the case with the Rock, it isn't so much what he says but how he says it; i.e. his delivery. *Sigh* I miss heel Rock. Not just the angry cutdowns of the fans, but the Memphis-like tendencies of the booking, particularly with his feud with Shamrock. Such a great IC title run. And 8 months too. Anyway. To Jericho: "You expect The Rock to [respect you, know who you are, something like that] because six months ago you were beating some jabroni named 'Juventud'?" I was always a sucker for "Roody Poo" and am kinda miffed that he hasn't used that in a couple years now. "Wellll it's the Biiig Slow!" Mocking Triple H's promo delivery with: "Tonight-uh, in this very ring-uh, for twenty minutes-uh" I remember a couple really good promos on Austin leading up to WM15, one of which was a "eulogy" on like the last raw before WM, and there was one on the event itself, I think with Michael Cole, and he started out by doing a fake-out where he thrust his head forward like he was gonna fight Michael Cole. Cole of course flinched and curled up. And Rock didn't actually do anything except smile and laugh. And then go on to cut his promo. Don't remember any of the words, but I've got WM15 on tape somewhere, so I could look it up and watch it.
Guest undisputedjericho Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 The opening of Rock Bottom... "Welcome to The Rock's In Your House, appaly named Rock Bottom! Now, for the next several months you can expect more In Your Houses named for The Rock, including Rock Solid, Know Your Role..."
Guest The Electrifyer Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 I just love the promo where he dissed the Big Show. "From the moment your crappy music hits, 'Well its the Big Slooow!'" "And you do without a shadow of a doubt, the most impressive thing The Rock has ever seen and its this: (Rock raises his arms maocking the chokeslam taunt) Uuuuuaaaaauuuuagh!" And then there's the promo against Big Show and Undertaker: "Big Show, you come on down!" (lifts his hands in the air and makes retarded-sounding screams in imitation of the Big Show) "Undertaker..." (takes his sunglasses off and tosses them aside) "You come on down!" (rolls his eyes up in his head and finishes his imitation of the Undertaked by moaning the following:) "DIE DIE DIE!" There was also that whole promo before the 6-man Hell in a Cell at Armeggeddon that was one of the funniest things of all time too.
Guest Bricks Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 "From the time your crappy music hits - 'Well it's the Big Slow'... And every single Rock fan stops, pauses and takes a look, and they all say this: 'Aw, I'm goin' to take a leak - this guy SUCKS!'" Blah, I see someone already posted it above me. Oh well, it was still good.
Guest AlwaysPissedOff Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 The bit he did with Coach at WM 18 was pretty damn funny. NWO 2002- "Hey Yo, chico... Razor Ramon!" Nash: "And you, Kevin Nash, Big Daddy Cool Diesel!" ::: pulls imaginary truck horn ::: "Toot, Toot!!!" Also, the Abortion bucket comments to Foley, the Taker one where he told Taker to roll his head down his back, the Armageddon 2000 HIAC one, and the one dissing Jericho's family were all great.
Guest The Superstar Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 "Maybe the Rock...is gonna have to beat Kurt Angle. Which means...(little boy voice) I'm gonna drink a big glass of milk! Eat some cookies, and take a few Viagra! "Or maybe the Rock...is gonna have to beat Triple H...which means-uh, he's gonna beat the Game-uh, in the middle of the ring-uh, and he's got a $2 slut for a wife-uh! "Or maybe the Rock...is gonna have to face Rikishi, beat Rikishi...(Rikishi voice) Uh did it fo dah Rock...Uh did it fo dah people...Uh did it uh did it (Rock voice) AAH SHUT YOUR MOUTH YA THONG WEARIN' FATTY! "Or maybe the Rock is gonna have to beat the Undertaker. Beat him so bad, that one more time, he'll raise up...(Undertaker voice, eyes roll in back of head) REST...IN...PEACE. "Or maybe the Rock is gonna have to beat...(redneck voice) Stone Cold Steve Austin. Which means I'm gonna get in my pick up truck, drink some Steveweisers, listen to some backstreet boys...and that's the bottom line, cuz the Great one said so!" -Before Armageddon HIAC. That's all from memory, I might have missed some parts.
Guest Brian Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 The Billy Gunn promo and the Jericho promo. Jericho looked so fucking happy to be there, look at him now. He looked like he was about to break KAYFABE~!
Guest pinnacleofallthingsmanly Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 You guys are posting all face ROck stuff. I liked when he fought Mankind at halftime heat and took off Mr Socko, threw him in an oven and turned it up. He was hitting Mankind with food and saying stuff like, "the Rock doesn't know what the hell this is, but your candy ass would eat it anyway!" There was the promo that he cut on MAnkind before Royal Rumble. He was talking about going down Know Your Role Blvd and turning onto Jabroni Drive and checking Mankind's candyass into the Smackdown Hotel. He said he was going to put Mankind through the Spanish announce table, the English announce table and Hung Ching Ping-the Chinese announce table. His delivery was so much better back then. He could probbaly cut the same promo now and it would suck because his delivery sucks as a face. He talked in a different voice back then and he stood still and took his time instead of talking fast and moving around so much. There was a promo where he was dissing Austin and was talking about how the last time he checked, a Brahma Bull would stomp the living piss out of a Rattlesnake. I know this is face Rock, but the RAW after Summerslam 99 where the Rock did color commentary had some funny comments. The Rock was just the shit back then. One time the camera showed him at the annnounce table, and he saw it and did the People's Eyebrow. Another time it cut to him and he just looked it with kind of a sneer. Michael Cole was commenting about Triple H's quest for the title, but the Rock looked at it with a different take. He said that Triple was crying and made a funny crying noise before saying Triple H should be going for the Women's title. Even when the Rock went down he was funny sometimes. He was talking shit to Triple H and Triple H ended up with a chair. He was saying, "Yeah! Yeah! Right there to Mankind!" As soon as he got the words out of his mouth, he got waffled with a chair too. I loved the Rock, but I had to laugh at that. I also laughed when Austin was beating up on him at the fake funeral. There was a bump that the ROck took where he got hit, went up against a guardrail and slid back down it in a funny position. When you think about it, it's pretty damn fucking funny that the Rock threw Austin off of a bridge one week, and had a funeral for him the next week on RAW.
Guest Mindless_Aggression Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 "Billy Gunn even if the Rock's punch misses, the force will be so great, that you'll catch pneumonia and die anyways!" Something to that effect, I jsut remember spewing DR. Pepper out of my nose.
Guest pinnacleofallthingsmanly Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 The Rock's turn that sumbitch sideways stuff was pretty good when he first started doing it.
Guest The Superstar Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 I remember on that RAW Pinnacle was talking about (night after SS99) he fought Gangrel in the first hour main event, and at the announce table during HHH/Foley he said "The Rock vs. Gangrel...who's booking this crap?"
Guest Just call me Dan Posted August 5, 2002 Report Posted August 5, 2002 I'm not exactly sure from what time period this was from, and I'm just paraphrasing but he claimed " In The Rock's courtroom, The Rock would be judge, jury and executioner. And nine times out of ten it would be a hung jury if you know what the Rock means" *people's eyebrow* Gold.
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