King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 10, 2005 HeldDOWN is presented by OAOAST Entertainment. *^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^* OAOAST HeldDOWN~! The sound of Ashlee Simpson's LaLa can only mean one thing. Well, two, if you count Hoff preparing to hurl his monitor through a window. Yes, it's HeldDOWN~! You probably can't see that. But trust me, it's HeldDOWN~! And we are L I V E LIVE~! in San Francisco, Californighay~! And you know what they have in California? Fireworks! But since that pic doesn't work anymore either, you'll just have to use your imagination. Just like you'll have to use it to see Triple C at Sofa Central COLE Welcome to HeldDOWN~!, our loyal viewing public. And thank you for your patience with the new timeslot for this week only, a little later than usual. CABOOSE OMG WORKED SHOOT~! COLE Yeah...anyway. Michael Cole along with Caboose and The Coa... COACH Holla aitcha boiz~! COLE ...The Coach. On tap tonight, both the OAOAST World Tag Team and Heavyweight Championships will be defended. The first title defence for new Tag Team Champions The Sk8ter Boiz could be their toughest as they take on the monstrous Hell's Hitmen! CABOOSE Of course it'll be their toughest! It's their first! And it'll also be their last, because after tonight, they'll have o try and make a career out of hitting each other with wierd objects and diving off of high places for people's enjoyment, like that Bam guy. COLE Oh well, at least they'll be trained for it. CABOOSE What is it with these worked shoots? Is Gertwitz writing this or something? COLE ...also tonight, the second time meeting over the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title, between champion Axel and one half of Black T, challenger, Tony Brannigan. CABOOSE Original versus Original, just like it should be. COLE Plus, Women's Division action, an update on the HI-YAH HV Title with Mene Gene and a whole lot more. But we kick it off with singles action. Italian Champion, John "Rock Hard" Brickstone will be here after this abrupt and needless commercial break. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 10, 2005 *Give me fuel Give me fire Give me that which I desire!* “Fuel” by Metallica starts playing, bringing the crowd to its feet. After a few seconds of waiting, the entrance doors slide open, and John “Rock Hard” Brickston comes out to a loud pop. His right hand is still in a cast, but his ribs are no longer taped up. The OAOAST Italian Championship belt shines across the waist of the man known as “Rock Hard”, and Brickston is in a good mood, a wide smile appearing on his face. Brickston looks at the crowd, and then walks to the ring, slapping hands with the fans. *DING DING DING* MICHAEL BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall, with a thirty-minute time limit. Introducing first, coming to the ring at this time. Standing 6-foot-6, and weighing in at 215 lbs. From Sacramento, California. He is the One And Only AngleSault Thread Italian Champion, JOHN “ROCK HARRRRRRDDDDDDDDDDDDD” BRRRRRRICCCCCCKKKKKSSSSSTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNN!!!! COLE John Brickston appears to be in a very good mood tonight. COACH And why wouldn’t he be, Michael? Following what happened 2 weeks ago at School’s Out, Brickston has a right to be happy! He made Tha Puerto Rican tap out to the anklelock once again. CABOOSE So? He didn’t win the 24/7 Title. Brickston may have made PRL tap out, but PRL got the last laugh! COLE You’re right Caboose. Brickston isn’t the 24/7 Champion yet, but something tells me that may change soon. CABOOSE In your dreams, Cole. PRL will be 24/7 Champion for a damn long time! The camera cuts to the ring where Brickston’s opponent is waiting. BUFFER And his opponent. Already in the ring. Weighing in at 230 lbs. From Jefferson City, Missouri. TOM “CAPITALLLLLLLLLLLLLL” GORRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!! Tom “Capital” Goran raises his hands in the air, but barely gets a reaction. Meanwhile, John “Rock Hard” Brickston enters the ring, and lets out a mighty roar. The crowd is now responding to the roar with a pop. Brickston unhooks the Italian Title belt from his waist, and raises it to another nice pop from the crowd. He goes to the top rope, and raises the belt again. COLE Brickston’s ribs have fully healed. Notice that he no longer has them taped. This is a non-title match. CABOOSE Honestly, if Brickston can hold the Italian Title, then I’m sure Tony Gonad or whatever his name is can become #1 contender. COLE Oh, will you stop!? Brickston gets off the top rope, and looks at Goran, who looks back. “Fuel” continues playing, as “Rock Hard” hands the Italian Championship belt over to referee Nick Soapdish. Referee Nick Soapdish hands the belt over to a ring crewmember. CABOOSE Oh how I hope Brickston loses the Italian Title soon. He’s held the belt since April! He’s held it longer than he should have. COLE No he hasn’t. John Brickston has proven that he is a talented superstar, and a worthy Italian Champion. CABOOSE What planet are you living on? Referee Nick Soapdish checks on Brickston, and then Tom Goran. Brickston shadowboxes. Referee Nick Soapdish calls for the bell, as “Fuel” by Metallica dies down. *DING DING DING* JOHN “ROCK HARD” BRICKSTON VS. TOM “CAPITAL” GORAN Brickston and Goran circle each other, the crowd still cheering. Brickston and Goran lock up. The two jockey for position, with Brickston sending Tom into a turnbuckle. Referee Nick Soapdish orders Brickston to let go. “Rock Hard” does so. Tom Goran goes to punch John Brickston, but Brickston blocks the punch with his right hand, and attacks Goran with his left. He punches Goran several times, making him daze. “Rock Hard” whips Tom “Capital” Goran into the ropes, and follows with a big boot. COLE Brickston is in control early on. John drops several elbows onto Tom Goran, and then picks him up, and gives him several European Uppercuts. Tom “Capital” Goran becomes dizzy, so John “Rock Hard” Brickston grabs him, and places him on his shoulders. The crowd stands up and cheers loudly, knowing what is coming up next. Indeed, Brickston hits Tom “Capital” Goran with the Killswitch! COLE There it is! The Killswitch! And early in this match too! This maybe over very quickly! CABOOSE Good God is Tom “Capital” Goran really a jobber! COACH SHHHH! Ix-nay on the breaking-kayfabe-ay. CABOOSE What-ay? COACH Oy vey. Brickston lets out a mighty roar, and then turns Tom Goran around. He grabs Tom’s right leg, kneels down, and applies the anklelock on Goran, holding his right leg with his right hand, and twisting the ankle with his left hand. Brickston and Goran both scream as the crowd cheers loudly. COLE The anklelock has been applied! Tom “Capital” Goran is in the center of the ring trapped in the anklelock! CABOOSE Oh come on Tom! Pull a Barry Horowitz! PULL THE UPSET! PULL THE UPSET! The crowd chants “TAP! TAP! TAP!” Referee Nick Soapdish checks on Tom Goran, who is screaming in pain, trying in vain to escape the anklelock. Brickston yells at him to quit. Referee Nick Soapdish asks Goran if he gives up. Goran yells out “YES! YES I DO!” and taps the mat! Referee Nick Soapdish calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* (1:26) BUFFER The winner of this contest…JOHN “ROCK HARRRRRDDDDDDDDD” BRRRRIIICCCCCKKKKKSSSSSTTTOOOOOONNNNNNN!!!! COLE And score another victory for John Brickston! CABOOSE Boo. Boo! “Fuel” by Metallica starts up. Referee Nick Soapdish raises Brickston’s hands in victory, while the crowd cheers. Brickston has a wide smile on his face as he plays to the crowd. Referee Nick Soapdish grabs the Italian Title belt, and hands it over to Brickston. Brickston raises the OAOAST Italian Championship belt for all to see. COLE John Brickston is on a roll. He took out “Capital” Tom Goran in less than 2 minutes! CABOOSE Oh so what? A 90-year-old woman in a respirator could take out Tom Goran in less than 2 minutes. COACH Why don’t you put over John Brickston for a change? CABOOSE Ix-nay on the kayfabe-breaking-ay. COACH Oh crap. “Fuel” continues playing as Brickston plays to the crowd. Suddenly, the crowd’s attention turns to the entranceway, as “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican runs into the ring. CABOOSE Hurray! PRL is here! The Corporate Champ slides into the ring, and is about to attack John Brickston, when Brickston turns around and notices PRL. PRL stops dead in his tracks, and manages a nervous smile, as he stands face-to-face with John Brickston. The crowd starts cheering. Tha Puerto Rican slowly backs out of the ring, while Brickston inches closer and closer to the 24/7 Champion. The crowd starts booing. COLE PRL is backing down from a fight! CABOOSE That’s because he’s not ready to fight. Look at him. He’s in his street clothes! He’s in no condition to fight. COACH Oh come on! The crowd starts chanting “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” P.R. exits the ring, and walks up the ramp, taunting the fans along the way. John Brickston stands in the ring pissed off, mouthing “Asshole.” COLE I bet after what happened at School’s Out, Tha Puerto Rican wants nothing to do with John Brickston. COACH But I bet that John Brickston wants to get his hands on Tha Puerto Rican. Specifically, PRL’s 24/7 Title. COLE Good point. Brickston demands for a microphone. Meanwhile, Tha Puerto Rican is at the entrance stage. JOHN “ROCK HARD” BRICKSTON Hey! Hey P.R.! Hey PRL! PR turns around. BRICKSTON I’m talking to you! Get your Latino ass back into this ring! The crowd pops. PRL laughs it off. COLE Come on PRL! Get into the ring! CABOOSE You’re not the boss of him! The entrance doors slide open, and PRL is about to leave, when John speaks again. “ROCK HARD” Hey PRL! Get into the ring, or I will MAKE you get into the ring! PRL stops, and turns around. He now has a nervous look on his face. He mouths “Okay”, and starts walking down the ramp. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” COLE Brickston must have something very important to say to PRL if he wants him to come to the ring. “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican jaws with the fans, and then enters the ring. He is shaking, sweating. He takes a gulp, and then stands toe-to-toe with Brickston. He asks him what he wants. COLE What’s Brickston going to say next? CABOOSE Just shut up and listen! JOHN “ROCK HARD” BRICKSTON P.R. I just want to make one thing clear: I can’t stand you! The crowd cheers. CABOOSE Savages. ROCK HARD And because of that, I would love it if I could rip you apart limb from freaking limb. The crowd cheers again. CABOOSE Get out of the ring PRL. Brickston’s a mad man. BRICKSTON So, what I’m asking. No wait. What I’m DEMANDING is a rematch. A rematch for the OAOAST 24/7 Championship. And I want the rematch…at The Great Angle Bash Sunday June 26th! COLE Yeah! It’s about time! CABOOSE Don’t give it to him, P. He doesn’t deserve it. COACH What do you mean he doesn’t deserve it? CABOOSE He doesn’t deserve it. BRICKSTON I want to destroy you, AND take your belt. After The Great Angle Bash, I will become the NEW 24/7 Champion! So what do you say, P.R.? You going to give me the rematch that I deserve? I beat your ass at School’s Out, and damnit, I can do it again! The crowd cheers. PRL thinks it over. COLE What is PRL’s decision going to be? CABOOSE Hopefully no. PRL grabs the microphone. The crowd quiets down. “THE CORPORATE CHAMPION” THA PUERTO RICAN You want a rematch? A rematch for the 24/7 Championship? The championship that I have defended day in and day out for the past 2 months? You want to fight me one-on-one, mano-e-mano, in the ring, at The Great Angle Bash on June 26th? You want to go toe-to-toe, face-to-face, with the most electrifying man in all of professional wrestling? YOU WANT TO FACE ME, THE GREATEST PUERTO RICAN WRESTLER OF ALL-TIME? YOU WANT TO FIGHT “THE CORPORATE CHAMPION” THA PUERTO RICAN FOR THE 24/7 CHAMPIONSHIP AT THE GREAT ANGLE BASH? BRICKSTON YEAH! PRL has a mean look on his face. PRL Well, Tha Puerto Rican says…. nah. Tha Puerto Rican drops the microphone, and leaves the ring. The crowd, and John Brickston are shocked. The crowd starts booing and chanting “P.R. SUCKS!” COLE “Nah”? “Nah”? That’s it? There’s not going to be a match? CABOOSE Ha! Ha! I love it! PRL just took the life out of this crowd and out of John Brickston! Way to go PRL! COACH Tha Puerto Rican just turned down Brickston’s challenge. He’s walking away! Indeed, PRL is walking up the ramp, with a smirk on his face. Brickston curses at PRL. PRL responds by doing the “You can’t see me!” hand gesture. COLE Tha Puerto Rican is afraid of getting into the ring with John “Rock Hard” Brickston! The last two times these two have been in the ring, PRL has tapped out to the anklelock. He’s afraid of losing the 24/7 Championship, which is why he is refusing to have a rematch! CABOOSE Oh that is bull. PRL doesn’t feel Brickston has proved he deserves a rematch. COACH How so? Brickston has made PRL tap out to the anklelock at Living Anglelously AND School’s Out! CABOOSE He was just lucky those times. COACH Why do I even bother arguing with you? PRL has left. The crowd is chanting “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” while John “Rock Hard” Brickston stands in the ring pissed off. He grabs his OAOAST Italian Championship belt, and leaves the ring. COLE Well, it looks like we won’t be seeing PRL defend the 24/7 Title against John Brickston at The Great Angle Bash after all. But we still got 3 weeks left till the pay-per-view, so that may soon change. Anyway folks, we’ll be right back with more HeldDOWN~! right after this! John “Rock Hard” Brickston walks up the entrance ramp. (FADE OUT) COMMERCIALS! SHILL SHILL SHILL!! (FADE IN) A caption in big, white blocky letters appears on the bottom right hand corner of the screen reading "DURING THE BREAK". PRL is shown in the parking lot looking around. COLE Back on HeldDOWN~!, and would you just look at this! COACH Tha Puerto Rican turned down John Brickston's challenge for a rematch at The Great Angle Bash, and left the arena during the break! CABOOSE PRL was just acting smart. He knew that Brickston was chasing him, so he decided to leave so that he can live to fight another day. That's all he was doing. COLE Oh come on. The Corporate Champ enters The Lightning Crew Mobile, and starts up the engine. He looks around for any sign of John Brickston, and then drives away, leaving the parking lot. The crowd boos. COACH Hopefully, we get that rematch soon. CABOOSE It will never happen. NEEEVVEEERRRRR. The camera shows the parking lot. The Lightning Crew Mobile has left the building. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 10, 2005 In the backstage area, Zack Malibu and Some Guy are shown chatting it up, and the appearance of the two longtime stars draws a pop from the arena crowd viewing this on the Angletron. Our cameras pick them up in mid conversation. SOME GUY ...I see where you're coming from though. Now he's feeding them that bulls- Before the censors can come after us, Some Guy and Zack's conversation is cut off by the appearance of the once popular, now loathed Female Phenom, Crystal, and her muscle, Gunner Sharps. CRYSTAL Hi boys. Whatcha talkin' about? MALIBU Nothing of your concern. CRYSTAL Oooh, secretive. How cute. Are you going to paint each other's nails next? Malibu inches forward, having kicked Crystal's ass in the past and ready to do it again. She smugly grins, but Some Guy puts an arm in the path of his tag partner, cutting him off so that cooler heads prevail. SOME GUY What's your deal? Here to stir the pot? I know you've been getting somewhat chummy with Static, Jax and Stone lately. CRYSTAL Chummy nothing honey, it's all business. In fact, the sooner you guys realize that this is all business the better this company will be. Quite frankly, I'm surprised Zack here didn't tuck tail and run last summer when I beat your ass. MALIBU Why would I run from YOU? CRYSTAL Why? Because on your best days, you couldn't beat me fair and square. I took you to the limit, I made you tap in War Games, and I took your precious World Title and made your brain cells drop faster than the ratings for UPN. You lost everything because of me. I sent you on your downward spiral, and you were so close to the breaking point, until you decided to relive your glory days and become a kiss ass again, and that just goes to show how different we really are. While you guys walked down memory lane and started fighting over crap that no one cares about from three years ago, I took the ball and ran with it, and look at me now! It doesn't matter that they don't chant my name anymore, because I know what I am. I'm a superstar. A cornerstone of this company, and while you guys are fighting over yesterday, the future is taking shape right under your noses. MALIBU The only thing that should be in your future is a muzzle. Crystal's eyes widen, and she goes to scratch Zack's eyes out, but is scooped up and put back down by Gunner. SOME GUY What's the matter, Gunner, forgot her leash? Now Gunner lunges forward, but Crystal jumps in front of him. CRYSTAL Wait...wait wait, this is what they want. Malibu and Some Guy look at each other in confusion, while Crystal whispers in Gunner's ear. Gunner pulls back, lip snarled, and nods "yes". CRYSTAL Ok, Mr. Malibu and Mr. Guy, tell you what. I'm gonna give you, Zack, a chance at redemption, and you, Some Guy, a chance to see what it's like to be in the ring with the Female Phenom. How about the two of you meet the two of us in the ring tonight? The crowd cheers at the sound of this announcement. Malibu and Some Guy look at each other, somewhat pleased. MALIBU You down. SOME GUY I'm in. CRYSTAL OK boys, it's a date...and after this night is over, I don't think either of you would want to call me again. The confident chick and her hired hand head off, with Crystal giving a flip of the hair that brushes Malibu across the face as they stroll away. MALIBU ...what a bitch. COLE Can you believe that? Tonight, it's going to be Zack Malibu and Some Guy taking on Crystal and Gunner Sharps!! CABOOSE I know. I just saw it. COLE Yes...but...it's TONIGHT! CABOOSE You know, for such a drama queen, you sure suck at being dramatic. COACH YO~! CABOOSE Don't even get me starte...hey, what the hell? ~“Kick My Axe” starts up, and Team Otaku walks out. They wave to the crowd for a moment, but remain on the stage. Otaku has a microphone.~ Otaku: Konichiwa, everyone. I’m sorry we weren’t on the show last week, but we had to deal with the misunderstanding with the police that happened at School’s Out. By the way, that was a heck of a match, wasn’t it folks? ~The crowd cheers loudly.~ Otaku: Ayane-chan, they liked what they saw. Anything to say? Ayane: Arigato, everyone. ~The crowd cheers a bit more.~ Otaku: Thank you. You know, I’ve noticed that Team Otaku is missing something. We’re missing a real solid power wrestler. One of the other things I did last week after clearing up matters with the police was to scout the independent promotions and I found a real talent. Tonight he will make his OAOAST debut. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Michael “The Punisher” Guerriero! ~”Unwind” by Weema starts playing and a young man wearing a black singlet with the Punisher logo on the front comes out.~ Otaku: Mike, why don’t you introduce yourself to the audience? ~He hands the mike to Mike(boy that sounds awkward).~ Guerriero: Thank you. It’s a great honor for me to be welcomed into Team Otaku. I hope that tonight I’ll be able to make it worth your trouble to bring me to the OAOAST. See you later, everyone. COLE Team Otaku, gaining a new member. And we'll have that debut match shortly here on HeldDOWN~! CABOOSE I'd like people a lot more if they stopped interrupti... COLE Sorry 'Boose, but apparantly, we've got to go backstage right now! CABOOSE Don't apologise to me. 'Boose reaches behind the sofa and retrieves his cricket bat. CABOOSE Apologise to this. COLE *Eep!* Backstage, OAOAST General Manager Josie Baker (remember her) is sat at her desk, going through her 'IN' tray Which is considerably taller than her 'OUT' tray's contents. Because if the out tray was full, then Josie would be doing her job well and that wouldn't be right at all. JOSIE Man, I hate paperwork. See! Now you feel sympathetic towards her, because she's busy, just like you. Smart booking 101 ladies and gents. *KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!* JOSIE Yeah, come in. Josie glances up from her papers and smiles, as Leon Rodez walks slowly (read: slightly dis-orientated) into the office. "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" JOSIE Hi Leon. How are you doing? RODEZ Never better. Josie nods, clearly noticing that Rodez's line of vision isn't perfect, but trying not to make a big deal out of it. JOSIE Uh...I take it this isn't a social visit then? RODEZ Nah, not quite. Although, you being GM just makes whining and complaining so much more appealing. No, see, I kinda need you to do something about Christian Wright interfering in my matches. JOSIE Yes, I had been putting some thought into that. RODEZ Don't get me wrong, I can deal with him myself if it comes down to it. But I don't want to go back on my word... JOSIE I understand that. And I admire the restraint you were able to show at School's Out, because I realise how much you must want to get your hands on Wright. Now, I saw what happened last week and I saw the condition you were left in. I'm not 100% percent certain that you're completely recovered from your concussion. And until I'm 100% certain that it's safe to put you in the ring, I'm keeping you off the active roster. Sighing, Rodez shakes his head. RODEZ There's no need, I'm fine. JOSIE Leon, I'm not stupid. I can see from the look in your eyes you're not okay. RODEZ That just lust baby. Pure, dirty lust. Josie chuckles to herself, but still doesn't seem convinced. RODEZ Look, the EMTs said I haven't got concussion. The docs said I haven't gone concussion. Hell, I've still got doctor's clearance, so I must be okay. JOSIE And how many second opinions did you take before finding a doctor willing to sign? Guiltily, Rodez doesn't answer. JOSIE When you're healthy and when the time is right, I'll give you a match with Wright. But until then, I completely agree with you Leon, something has to be done. Obviously, you're not a problem. The problem is Christian Wright not showing the same restraint that you are. RODEZ Exactly. JOSIE Warning him hasn't worked. Fining him hasn't worked. And I can't really warrant suspension or firing him, after just two incidents. Which...leaves me with only one option. Curious, Rodez wonders to himself what Josie means, as the GM opens a drawer of her desk and drops a group of papers onto her desk. JOSIE So, I got this drawn up. Rodez picks up the papers, scanning through the contents...as a smile grows on his face. JOSIE And basically, what this means is that you and Christian cannot come into any physical contact between now and your first match. If Christian breaks the agreement, he's out of here. Permanently. Obviously if you were to break it, you'd have to recieve the same punishment. But I've got no worries about that. RODEZ You're not just a pretty face, eh? JOSIE *smiles* Well, I didn't sleep my way to the job. RODEZ Shame... Josie glances up, as Rodez passes her the papers back. RODEZ ...anyway, thanks a lot Jos. When's this all come into effect? JOSIE Officially, as of last night. RODEZ Really? Doesn't Wright have to sign it? In the ring? With a steel briefcase nearby, which he'll hit me with when I'm not looking, before revealing he didn't actually sign the contract, so he can't be fired, then he signs it, so I give his wife the Stunner and he retaliates by giving Jivin' JR the Pedigree, leading into a 3 Stages Of Hell Match which he'll win by I'll still win the OAOAST World Title at the very next PPV anyway? JOSIE ... RODEZ ... JOSIE No. RODEZ Ah, cool. Listen, thanks Jos...you're doing a good job. Rodez smiles before turning on his heels and leaving the office, Josie sighing as he goes. JOSIE At least someone thinks so. (FADE IN) *dun dun* *dun dun* *dun dun* *dun dun* WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ARE YOU? WHO WHO, WHO WHO! I really wanna know WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ARE YOU? WHO WHO, WHO WHO! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOO" COLE Welcome back to HeldDown, folks, and we are currently about to be joined by CSI! CABOOSE And their newest member, BROCK...AUSSTIN! Oh, I can't wait! The fans jeer as CSI, wearing their new shirt, available on OAOAST's ShopZone, heads down to the ringside. Jay Richards, smiling and jawing with the fans, comes first, flanked by Jumbo. Behind them comes CHRIS STEVENS, patting the arm of BROCK AUSSTIN, who is all smiles. COLE If you missed it last week, Brock Ausstin became the newest member of CSI in dramatic fashion. It was supposed to be Chris Stevens and Jay Richards against Brock and Peter Knight, but Brock swerved us all, giving PK the F-Stunner-5 and shocking the world. COACH Brock even got his agent, Rick Heyross, with the F-Stunner-5, severing all ties to the man and aligning himself solely with Chris Stevens and CSI. The group gets into the ring, with Brock pausing at the end of the aisle to do the HAPPY HAPPY HOSS DANCE~, drawing a rabid cry from the fans. Brock hops onto the apron, where Stevens and Richards hold the ropes for the monster. Brock enters, followed by his comrades. Stevens asks for a microphone, and the group stands assembled in the middle of the ring. "P-K! P-K! P-K! P-K! P-K! P-K!" STEVENS You can all stop cheering right now. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" STEVENS You see, after the beatdown we laid on him last week, PK has been ordered to take the week off to recover. And that means that Peter Knight is not in the building. COLE What?! How can Josie do that? CABOOSE Hey, she's the boss! COLE Well I guess cooler heads will prevail, but it doesn't seem fair to keep PK out of the building! STEVENS Now, you people ought to be thanking me! Because, thanks to our actions, you've been spared a week's worth of PK on your TV. And instead you'll be treated to the hottest thing in primetime. "YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!" Stevens laughs. STEVENS But tonight, it isn't about me, it's about the man to my left. The man who made the best move of his career just one week ago. The man who has joined the most exciting collection of entertainers in wrestling history. COLE How long can this man go on! STEVENS Ladies and gentlemen, BROCK AUSSTIN!!!!!!!! The fans boo as Stevens passes the mic to Brock, who takes it with a laugh. BROCK PK, I told you I'd get another shot. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" BROCK And together, with my new buddies, we're gonna finish the job. So you might just wanna stay home. COLE Brock Ausstin showing a lot of arrogance. BROCK Now, the reason I joined CSI is real simple. These guys are goin' places. This is the hottest thing in primetime, and I am the biggest monster in wrestling. Together, we are unstoppable, and you people will remember the name Brock Ausstin. The fans boo....then ERUPT in cheers as a man makes his way in through the crowd! COLE IT'S PETER KNIGHT! COACH And he's got a BAT!! PK makes his way down to the ring amidst the cheering fans, then hops the railing. Bat in hand, he makes for the ring...but security stops him! "BOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COLE Aw, come on! CABOOSE Hey, PK knows the rules! He's not supposed to be here tonight! PK struggles to get past security as Brock waves him on. PK growls in anger as the guards hold him. Suddenly, Chris Stevens snatches the mic from Brock... STEVENS Well, look who decided to show up. Chris Stevens exits the ring, walking to where Knight is being held back. One guard manages to take the bat from PK. STEVENS PK, you're just making things harder on yourself. You should have enjoyed your vacation. We all were. An "oooooooooh" rises from the crowd, and Stevens smiles as the rest of CSI heads out of the ring to back him up. PK glares at Stevens. STEVENS You wanna hit me? Well come on, tough guy, hit me already. Stevens looks back at his group and laughs....until PK breaks free and NAILS Stevens with a right hand! Stevens falls to the ground, and the fans go WILD as PK falls on top of him and UNLOADS a barrage of right hands! COLE PK HAS HIS HANDS ON CHRIS STEVENS!! PK fires away, then gets up and lunges at Brock....but security GRABS him and hold him back! More guards rush out and get between PK and CSI, and Carl Winslow leads PK to the back as Jumbo helps Stevens to his feet. COLE Peter Knight is out of control! Folks, we need to take a break! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 10, 2005 Michael Buffer: This match will be to one fall with a television time limit. Introducing first, from Memphis, Tennessee, and weighing in at 230lbs, he is a member of the OAOAST J.O.B. Squad, and this is his OAOAST debut, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome JOHN SMITH! ~”Spasm” by Goat starts playing and John Smith walks out. He walks down the ramp and gets into the ring and waves nervously to the fans. A few cheers here and there can be heard.~ Caboose: Who is this loser? Cole: John Smith has wrestled for a few years in the world famous Memphis promotions, and has come to us, the OAOAST, to show us what he’s learned there. Coach: But will he have a chance to show us anything against this new member of Team Otaku, this Guerriero kid? Cole: We’ll find out in a moment. Michael Buffer: And, introducing his opponent, also making his OAOAST debut, he hails from Watertown, MA, and tonight he weighs in at 260 lbs, he is a member of Team Otaku, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome MIKE “THE PUN-ISHER” GU-ERR-I-ERO! ~”Unwind” by Weema starts up and Mike Guerriero walks out with Otaku II and Tony Capella. They give out a few high fives along the way to the ring, and when they reach it, Tony grabs Mike’s shoulder and gives him a few words of encouragement, then Mike pulls off his Punisher shirt and throws it into the crowd before sliding in and raising his right arm to the crowd as gets he gets up. The crowd mildly cheers.~ ~The referee signals for the bell, then Mike “The Punisher” Guerriero and John Smith meet in the middle of the ring and have a quick hand shake.~ Cole: What a nice show of sportsmanship between these two gladiators! Caboose: This Guerriero kid just wants Smith to know that there’s no bad feelings when he drives the poor slob through the mat with his finisher, which I have listed as the Final Judgement, a suplex turned into a powerslam. Cole: Oh, please, Caboose. ~They lock up, and Guerriero slips into a suplex position, and hits a nice snap suplex. Smith holds his back, but gets up quickly and walks into an overhead belly to belly suplex. Smith gets up a bit slower this time, and Guerriero picks him up in a bear hug, then swings him into a spinebuster out of it!~ Coach Man, he’s strong! Caboose: Remember who he’s fighting, guys. ~Guerriero hooks the leg for a pin attempt. 1! 2! No, Smith kicks out.~ ~Coach: Smith is tough! Not many can get beat like this and kick out of a move like that! ~Smith really has to struggle to get to his feet this time. “The Punisher” nods and whips Smith into the ropes. He sets up for a back body drop, but on the rebound, Smith kicks him in the head. Guerriero stumbles into the ropes and checks his jaw. He nods and grabs Smith again and drops him with a massive BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX! Mike Guerriero leaps high into the air and the crowd goes crazy! He pulls up Smith and lifts him up in a suplex, spins, and DROPS HIM IN A POWERSLAM! JACKHAMMER!~ Cole: WOW! That has to be it! ~The referee counts! 1! 2! 3!~ Cole: Mike “The Punisher” Guerriero wins in his OAOAST debut with ease! ~Otaku and Tony get into the ring to celebrate with their comrade, but “The Lightbringer” starts up and Satan’s Foot Soldiers run down the ramp. They slide in and it’s 3 on 3 as both teams start brawling. Officials pour out and, after a few tense moments, finally get the two teams separated. John Smith finally gets to his feet in the middle of this mess, and as SFS get dragged away, he goes to shake hands with “The Punisher.” Guerriero has a surprised look on his face, but he accepts the sign of sportsmanship. Smith begins laughing maniacally AND HE DECKS GUERRIERO!~ Caboose: SWERVE! ~Smith pulls up Guerriero into position and PILEDRIVES HIM! The officials get all over Smith as he continues to laugh like a mad man and joins SFS! They all raise their arms as they get pulled back up the ramp and Otaku and Tony check on their new ally. Caboose: Well, apparently, Cole, Smith learned to align himself with Satan worshippers while he was wrestling in Memphis. Coach: That’s actually fairly normal compared to some of the stuff seen over there, from some of the rumors I’ve heard. Caboose: Sure...'rumours'. Cole: Alright, without any further ado, let's go back to our broadcast colleague Mene Gene Okerlund, with a special update on events from the Orient. Gene-O! Cut backstage, to: THE HI-YAH HOTLINE~! In a studio that looks suspiciously like Tony Schiavone's set, Mene Gene is backstage, mic in hand. To his right a graphic appears, with the HI-YAH HV Title belt lying under the word 'VACANT'. OKERLUND Thank you Michael. Mene Gene Okerlund here with a special update on the status of the HI-YAH HV Championship. Towards the end of last year, the top belt of our Japanese neighbours came into prominance on OAOAST television, particularly during the wars between Axel and Ragdoll. The graphic in the corner changes to a bloody Axel holding the belt. OKERLUND But in recent months, the belt has been MIA on OAOAST TV. Many OAOAST fans know that since becoming #1 Contender to the OAOAST Championship, Axel stopped appearing with the belt. No explanation was given on OAOAST broadcasts. But the truth is, in the early part of this year, Axel lost the belt, to this man... The graphic changes to a picture of David Hasselhoff. OKERLUND ...wait a minute. Obviously, that's the wrong picture...can someone in the truck get off their damn ass and cha... The graphic abruptly changes to a picture of Masahiro Chono. OKERLUND ...thank you. Yes, Axel lost the belt in March, to Masahiro Chono. Impossible? Maybe. But you have to admit, it's a damn imaginative explanation. Anyway, Chono won the championship from Axel. But in recent weeks he has missed a number of HI-YAH commitments. Infact...he's missed every single one of them. Leading to the president of HI-YAH, Leonard F. Hiyahson, stripping him of the title and organising a championship tournament. The graphic changes to a scrawny looking kid, presumably Leonard F. Hiyahson. OKERLUND The tournament has been a big talking point in Japan, so much so that HI-YAH officials restructured the tournament, in order to make more money. The result is a 16 Man Tournament, with the 16 split into four groups of four. And here are the groups... -BLOCK A- Bohemoth Jasper Romero Dr. Max Anderson Pheonix -BLOCK B- Dr. Steven Pigley "Devastatin" Danny Douglas Kidd Dre Illuminator II -BLOCK C- Nathan Black Cameron S. Aussie III Rebel Flag Romeo Marcellus "One Eye" Wallace -BLOCK D- The 70s Dude Vitamin X Yuji Chusaki Alex Bryant OKERLUND The members of each block will meet each other in seperate matches. The first pairings will take place tommorrow night in Saitama, the second pairings will be contested this Sunday night in Yokohama and on Tuesday night in Tokyo, the third pairings will occur. The wrestler with the best record in each block advance on to the semi finals. Now, in the event of a tie in any of the blocks, the tied wrestlers will be flown over to America and will compete on HeldDOWN~! next Thursday night. The graphic becomes the HeldDOWN~! logo. OKERLUND The semi final matches will be contested on Sunday, June 19th. The winners of the semi finals will then go on to compete in the finals, two weeks from tonight. And that final match will be shown live, via sattelite, on HeldDOWN~! The graphic changes back to David Hasselhoff. OKERLUND Is that guy paying us for publicity or something? Who is he anyway? *off screen murmuring* OKERLUND Bay...Watch? *off screen murmuring* OKERLUND Night...Rider? No, never heard of it. *off screen murmuring* OKERLUND Anyway, the block matches are tommorrow night, Sunday night and Tuesday night. Now, if you want to learn the results of these matches before anyone else...and are too bone-idle or computer illiterate to use the internet like most people...then call the OAOAST HOTLINE~! Hosted by me, Mene Gene! Call 1-800-HELDDOWN to get the results, plus all the latest gossip, play the special OAOAST trivia game, find out when OAOAST wrestlers make an apperance in your area and...wait, what...no, don't cut me off...please...1-800-HELDDOWN...get your parents' permission...no, on second thoughts, forget that...just call...CALL NOW...that's 1-800-HELDDOWN...wait, I haven't told them the best bit yet...no, wait...keep that camera on me...those idiots back there don't know anything...don't make me come over ther... *PFFFFTT!* Cut back to the arena. COACH What was that number again? CABOOSE Who cares? COACH Good point! Backstage, “Rock Hard” John Brickston shines up his Italian Championship as “Thunder Tim Livingston walks into the locker room. ROCK HARD Yo! Thunder! Man, how you been? *The crowd cheers loudly for the hometown boy.* THUNDER I’m awesome, champ. I see you’re looking good and that hand is healing. And I can’t be happier because tonight, I’m back home in SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA! *The crowd erupts* ROCK HARD Haha. You’re pretty good at that whole cheap pop thing, man. You know, at School’s Out, you really did a number on The Lightning Crew with me. I never got a chance to really thank you for helping me out. THUNDER Hey, man. It was no problem. It was nice to make an impact like that at the very beginning of my tenure here at the OAOAST. Speaking of which, I’ve been hearing lately that the Crew is REALLY pissed off at me about something. You know what they’re spouting off about? I mean, those guys are REALLY just annoying as… Suddenly, Cuban Wall barges into the locker room. WALL Thunder! Thunder turns around and looks face to face with Cuban Wall. THUNDER Well, well, well… WALL You punk! You think you’re all bad after what you did at School’s Out? You think you’re the friggin’ king around here all of a sudden? Yeah, you took me out with your “Thunderbomb” and your team got the win against us, but you had a little help from your pal Brickston there. You think that you can take out me, The Muscle of The Lightning Crew? HUH? Brickston steps in front of Thunder… BRICKSTON Whoa, whoa, whoa, big fella. Listen… But Thunder slides Brickston to the side: THUNDER I’ll take care of this, Johnny. (Brickston steps back and watches the two.) You know… *SLAP* Cuban Wall slaps Thunder before he can say anything else, Thunder turns away for a second and rubs his sore cheek as Brickston grimaces. Brickston tries to console Thunder for a second, but Thunder pushes him aside and smiles as he looks back at Wall. THUNDER You finished? *grin* You know, CW, if I can call you CW, you’re just mad that you got caught off guard by the new guy in town. In fact, you’re worried that I might come in and steal your…thunder, right? Well, lemme tell you something right here. I’m not here to steal anybody’s thunder, especially that of some overgrown wannabe badass who probably goes home at night and looks in the mirror telling himself, “I’m the man! I’m the man! I’m THE MAN!” Right? WALL Yeah! THUNDER Right??? WALL Yeah!!! THUNDER RIGHT? WALL HELL YEAH!!! THUNDER *smiles* Then if that’s the case, your mirror has GOT to be lying to you. (Crowd cheers) WALL Then what do YOU say when you look in the mirror, huh? Thunder smirks and then looks at Brickston with a “Are you kidding me?” look on his face and then looks back at Wall. THUNDER Who in their right mind looks in their mirror for support? You think you’re Snow White or something? *clears throat* Mirror, mirror, on the wall Who is the dumbest one of all? *crowd laughs* Well, I’ll tell you what. You don’t have to go home and look at your mirror for answers. In fact, you don’t even have to move. Thunder inches closer to Wall as they go nose to nose. The crowd cheers in anticipation as the camera zooms in. THUNDER Listen up, “big man.” You want to show your precious leader, Tha Dominican, or The Trinidad and Tobagoan, or whatever Carribean Island he says he’s from, that you’re still his Number One Go-To Guy, right? And what better way to do that then by taking out that thorn that has been in your side lately? To show you still have that power! To show that you’re The Muscle of the Lightning Crew! Well, you better find somebody else, then, because if you try and single me out, and you try to take ME down? Then you will get the rudest awakening that you’ve ever received. And when you DO go back home after I whooped your ass, and you look in the mirror for support, you won’t be able to stand looking at yourself, because you’ll realize just how full of crap those false prophecies really were. BRICKSTON Oh we’ll see about that, Thunder. We’ll see about that. Thunder playfully slaps Brickston on the chest, but Brickston throws his hand away. THUNDER We will, won’t we. *smile* C’mon Brickston, we don’t need to be in the presence of this goon no more. I’ll see you around…BIG MAN! Thunder walks away with Brickston as Cuban Wall is left standing and looking at the two of them, huffing and puffing in anger. COLE Cuban Wall is angry! Thunder seems confident! COACH You know, Thunder is gonna have to stop hiding behind his buddy Brickston, pretty soon. CABOOSE You couldn’t be more right, Coach. Thunder almost seems overconfident because he’s with the Italian Champ. COLE Ladies and gentlemen, we’ll be right back!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 10, 2005 COACH Welcome back to the show. For the past few weeks, OAOAST officials have been having many closed-door meetings that no one, not even the most connected of connected people, have been let in on. Well, Tuesday night...we were all let in on it during a meeting at the Headquarters. COLE With the modern sporting world revolution of dominant females in previously male-dominated sports, combined with many recent female superstars making noise here in the OAOAST, the powers-that-be have decided to bring back the OAOAST Women's World Championship, this time with much, much more emphasis on the athletic portion of their work. There'll be no "puppies", no bra & panties matches, and hell if we see any of these incredible athletes wasted in silly bikini contests! CABOOSE (sighs)...and as much as it pains us, me and Coachman have promised to "keep it in our pants", as the phrasing went, and respect the athleticism and ability of the competitors before us, no matter how physically attractive we find them. COLE Very good. Now, the first new champion will be decided in a tournament of sorts...the next few weeks on HeldDOWN~!, we'll be seeing four qualifying matches, with the winners of those four matches advancing to a Four-Way Elimination Match at the Great Angle Bash on June 26th. The winner of that Four-Way will become the OAOAST Women's World Champion. COACH We don't have any official bracketing yet, but we do know that all eight ladies in the tournament will be making their OAOAST debuts in their tournament matches. Eight brand-new talents, all plucked from the independent and international scenes, set to face off for what we hope will become the biggest prize in North American women's wrestling. COLE We're gonna start off the tournament tonight with a match, imported from the American independent scene as well as their series of bouts for Centuria Federation Lucha, a female lucha libre promotion on the US/Mexican border, last summer, as Jenny Adams, who lacks size but makes up for it in heart and determination, will face off with the rather bizarre Confusia, a masked individual who doesn't exactly function like the rest of us. Let's go now to pre-recorded comments from both young ladies.... (Cut to footage from eariler, with Jenny Adams, a short, skinny blonde girl, standing at the usual HeldDOWN~! interview set.) JENNY ADAMS Um...hi there. My name's Jenny Adams, and I'm from Toledo, Ohio. I don't really have much to say. Tonight, I hope to try my hardest, show that I'm a talented athlete, and hopefully advance to the four-way-dance at the Great Angle Bash. Thanks. (Cut to a shot of the parking lot from earlier today. The camera pans around and sees nothing but cars. Camera then pans down to the sidewalk below it, to reveal Confusia, wearing her black mask with random green squiggles around it and multi-colored tassles on the upper back of it, dressed in full ring gear (green no-sleeve top, obscenely baggy black pants with green Japanese and zodiac writings all over them, and one really long tassle in the front). She's just lying on the ground with a blank look on her face, looking up at the sky. This goes on for ten awkward seconds...before she snaps her head and looks directly into the camera.) CONFUSIA BAH! BAH! (growls) (The cameraman runs away) (Cut back to arena, as the camera pans the crowd and "Bloody Murderer" by Cursive blasts through the PA system. Out comes Confusia, who walks out slowly with a sidewards hump to her stance. She makes her way about one-fourth down the aisle...then runs down the rest of the way, screaming random mumbllings to the sky before sliding into the ring and crouching into a corner, burying her face in the middle turnbuckle.) BUFFER The following is the opening bout in the tournament to crown a new OAOAST Women's World Champion! Introducing first, from Timbucktoo, weighing in at 165 pounds....CONFUSIA! COLE Um...well, right off the get-go, we see one of the most bizarre female competitors that I think any of us have ever seen in our lives. COACH One of the most bizarre of ANY gender! CABOOSE And as you heard Buffer say, she weighs 165 pounds...outweighing her opponent by about 45 pounds and is about four or five inches taller than the 5'2 Adams. (Cut back to the shot panning the crowd, as "Fly" by Loudmouth starts up. Jenny Adams, wearing red variations of both an athletic tank top and short tights, runs out from the entrance and pumps her fists in the air, trying to get a reaction from the crowd. She then runs down the aisle with both arms outstretched, trying to slap hands with fans on both ends. She runs up the ring steps before grabbing the top rope and flipping herself over it, landing on her feet as flashbulbs go off in the audience.) BUFFER Her opponent, weighing in at 120 pounds and hailing from Toledo, Ohio...Jenny Adams! COLE Interesting factoid here: her last name "Adams" is actually a tribute to the one female athlete that she looked up to more than any other in the world as inspiration for getting into wrestling, that being our own Crystal. COACH Watching Crystal now, you have to be disappointed that she became what she is, knowing that she's a role model for so many young girls out there, including Jenny. *BELL RINGS* Jenny stands in her corner, clapping her hands to try to get the crowd to get into things and clap along. For the most part, they do. Jenny and Confusia circle around the ring, with Confusia screaming "Zah!" with the beat of the clap. Both competitors close in towards the center of the ring, with their hands out-stretched, as if they both know what the other wants to start off with... CABOOSE According to this fact sheet that Cole typed up here, these two both actually came from the same training school in Cincinatti and have wrestled each other over 50 times since their simultanious debut in September 2002. Right then, the two lock hands and start to engage in a Greco-Roman knucklelock, jocking for positioning to see who can get the first advantage. Adams tries to get underneath Confusia to make up for her lack of size, but Confusia catches on early and instead kicks Jenny's left hand, breaking the knucklelock on that side, before twisting around while keeping ahold of Jenny's right hand, twisting her whole arm. Confusia then goes right into a top wristlock (hammerlock). COLE For as bizarre as Confusia might look, she's got incredible in-ring instincts, from the matches I've seen of these two. Jenny screams in pain as Confusia cranks in on the hold. Adams then crouches down and springs herself up, doing a backflip out of nowhere to untwist her arm! Adams' amazing agility allows her to then reverse into a side wristlock of her own on Confusia! Confusia grimaces as the hold is applied, before awkwardly jogging behind Jenny and locking her hands together, cleverly reversing the wristlock with a rear waistlock. Confusia then puts her right foot out in front of Jenny and takes her down with a legtrip, before floating right into a front facelock on the mat. COACH In the short amount of time that this match has been going on, it's been a clever game of human chess. Jenny reaches around, trying to get out of the facelock that's clamping all of the oxygen from her head. Adams then brings her legs in before pushing herself upward and into a crouched position, forcing Confusia to come up to her knee if she wanted to hold on. Jenny can't break the hold, so she grabs onto Confusia's knee, pushes off with all of her weight, and pops her head out of the facelock before applying a side headlock on Confusia. COLE Wow...hell of a counter by Adams! Confusia quickly figures out a counter, as she lifts Adams up for a side suplex to reverse it. But, Adams uses her agility to roll out from behind. Right before she lands on her feet on the mat, she grabs Confusia's near arm, allowing her to then bring her over with a nice side armdrag! Both Jenny and Confusia come to their feet, as Confusia charges at Jenny. Jenny performs a bi paso (pronounced "bee pa-so"; side step and one-armed shove) and sends Confusia off to the ropes. Adams drops down to her stomach as Confusia leaps over her and comes off of the ropes on the other end. Adams comes up and rolls underneath a big Yakuza kick attempt from Confusia! Confusia stops herself, then turns around around and runs at Adams again, who performs a second bi paso to send Confusia off to the ropes! COACH The pace is picking up in a hurry! The applause level from the crowd is slowly rising as the action picks up. Confusia comes off of the ropes and Jenny leaps onto her shoulders in the electric chair position. Jenny spins herself around and performs an inverted armdrag, using her leg to bring Confusia over by the arm! Confusia rolls back to her feet, as Adams leaps on her for a hurricanrana. But, Confusia grabs Adams and tosses her off, causing Adams to backflip onto her feet! Adams charges at Confusia, who sends her off to the ropes with a bi paso of her own. Confusia bends down and lifts Adams on her way off the ropes, going for a backdrop. Adams goes up about six feet in the air...and lands on her feet on the way down! Adams doesn't lose a step, as she then runs and leaps to the middle rope and then the top rope with both feet, before doing a backflip over Confusia, who's facing the other way! Adams grabs her arm on the way down and connects with an INCREDIBLE moonsault armdrag! COLE MY GOD! Might as well call Jenny Adams "Catwoman"! CABOOSE I'm in agreeance...that was cool stuff. COACH Wow! The crowd starts to come to its feet after that one! Both competitors quickly come back to their feet, as Adams charges at Confusia, quickly twists behind her back to confuse her, and brings her over with another side armdrag! Confusia rolls to her feet yet again, as the claps from the crowd get increasingly louder. Confusia charges at Adams and runs right into a really high dropkick from the jaw where Adams twists herself in mid-air so she can roll back to her feet, sending Confusia out of the ring and to the floor! The entire lower level of the building is now standing, as Adams waits for Confusia to shake herself off. Confusia then turns around, as Adams charges to the ropes, sends herself over them...with a corkscrew tope into a flying headscissors, sending Confusia rolling into the guardrail! The crowd collectively goes "Whoa!" and starts to chant "HELD-DOWN!" in a frenzy! COLE My lord...and people thought that wrestling fans wouldn't give a women's WRESTLING division a chance! These two got this crowd on their feet within a minute of incredible, high-paced, high-flying WRESTLING! CABOOSE I'm the "mean one" of this crew, but even I'm takin' my hat off for that! Adams composes herself on the floor before slapping a few hands at ringside and pointing out to the crowd, acknoledging their response to the action thus far. She then sees Confusia stumble to her feet, worse for wear after the tope headscissors. Jenny charges at Confusia and leaps sideways in mid-air to grab onto the ringpost with both hands, swinging herself around (like the 619) to try and get momentum for a flying headscissors. But, Confusia braces herself, hooks Adams by the upper legs, and flings her backwards, sending her flying backwards, neck-first into the guardrail! COLE Yikes! What a show of improv defense and strength by the weirdo Confusia! COACH Ouch! CABOOSE I honestly think the referee is in kind of a state of amazement, as he's forgetting to even administer a ten-count to the two on the floor. Confusia lies on the protective mats on the ground for a second to rest before coming back up to her feet and screaming mumbles aloud while sauntering towards her opponent. Confusia growls and starts to repeatedly stomp Adams' back. She stops for a second to grab an empty Pepsi can and put it in her mouth before stomping once more and spitting the can onto Adams! Confusia continues to ramble in tongues, as she pulls Jenny up by her hair and launches her back into the ring, where Jenny rolls onto her stomach while holding her back. Confusia climbs onto the ring apron and launches herself over, connecting with an Eddie Guerrero-like slingshot senton onto Jenny's prone lower back! COLE It looks as if the bizarrely evil Confusia is choosing to target Jenny Adams' back here... Confusia pulls Adams up again by the hair, answering the referee's five-count by yelling at him, again in her bizarre, nonsensical language. The masked one sends Adams off with an Irish whip. Jenny bounces off of the ropes and right into Confusia's clutches, who spins her around and around before dropping her with the spinning sitdown slam! Instead of hooking Adams' legs for the cover, Confusia chooses to turn her opponent onto her stomach. Confusia rolls backwards onto her feet and comes off of the ropes slowly, driving herself down onto Jenny's back with a power drive elbow drop, ala the Great Muta. COACH You can see Adams reaching out to the crowd after each move to her back, almost like she's wanting their cheers to help her gain energy to fight back here... Confusia pops right back up, comes off the ropes again, and comes down with another elbow to the small of her opponent's back. Confusia pops right back up and comes off of the ropes for a third time, stops, and drops down on Adams with a falling headbutt to the small of her back. Confusia then turns Adams over and chokes her. She counts along up to four with the referee (again, in tongues) before letting go...and going right back to the blatant choke. She breaks it right at four and then chews on her own finger for a second. CABOOSE This is the type of competitor that I can get behind. Confusia gets up and pulls up Adams again. She sends her into the corner with a hard Irish whip, and then turns her around so that Jenny is stomach-first in the corner. Confusia follows up by going to work with a series of hard windmill chops in the corner before charging in like a bull with a headbutt to Jenny's lower back region! As Jenny's face grimaces in pain while she reaches outward with one hand and tries holding her back with the other arm, Confusia grabs her and lifts her in a side suplex position. Confusia spins around and around, teasing that she's going to drop her with a side suplex....then TOSSES her ass-first back into the corner (same bump as a suplex into the corner, just to a more extreme extent), causing Jenny to fall NECK-FIRST onto the canvas below her! COLE WHOA! The crowd chants "OUCH!", as Confusia quickly cradles up Jenny's legs for what she thinks will be an easy victory... 1... 2... Rope Break! Jenny got ahold of the bottom rope right above her. Confusia immediately gets up and tosses Jenny to mid-ring. Jenny rolls onto her stomach, and gets another elbow drop to the back for her troubles. Confusia pulls Jenny up again, and lifts her for a side slam. Confusia then spins around multiple times before swinging Jenny into a sitdown bomb drop! COACH Nice, innovative manuever there. However, Confusia gets up instead of keeping on Jenny for the pin. Confusia runs and comes off of the ropes, using the momentum to hit a rolling fistdrop to the face of Adams. Confusia then rolls Adams into a lateral press... 1... 2.... Kickout! Confusia pulls Adams back up to her feet and hooks her head and arm. Confusia goes for a suplex....but Adams wiggles out and lands on her feet behind her opponent. Adams tries to run to the ropes, but Confusia quickly spins around and nails a high kick to Jenny's upper back, sending her down hard. Confusia pulls Adams up by the hair again, getting her to a fully-standing position and just holding her up, as Adams's lower back has been noticably damaged. Confusia then, out of nowhere, brings her down with an STO. Confusia then looks to the sky before walking to the apron. Confusia quickly walks back into the ring before launching herself over the top rope and back onto the apron. Confusia launches herself over the top and back into the ring before bending over the middle rope and doing a weird headstand with half of her body outside the ring and her lower half in it. COACH Um...I have no clue what the hell she's doing. COLE Good...if you did, I'd have to question your sanity too. She allows Jenny enough time to stumble up to her feet during this wackiness. Adams brings herself together before going after Confusia's legs, which are hanging in the ring. She grabs onto them...and Confusia lets go of the apron, guillotining Jenny throat-first across the middle rope as Confusia rolls back to her feet on the floor! CABOOSE ...I never questioned the tactic for a second. Confusia points up to the sky for a brief moment before sliding back into the ring...and headbutting the top rope repeatedly. When she finishes there, Adams is back on her feet, albeit extremely dazed. Confusia rushes at her...and nails a high jumping knee strike to the side of Jenny's face, sending her down hard. Confusia immediately goes for the cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Confusia argues the merits of the two-count with the referee, again in tongues, before pulling Jenny up to her feet and sending her off with an Irish whip. Confusia bends over in mid-ring, telegraphing her next move...and in defense, Jenny hops over and brings her down with a Code Red (sunset flip bomb)! However, Jenny is too tired to capitalize on the move and keep the pin. She clutches her back, as she gets up and prepares for her next move. Confusia gathers herself on the mat and gets back to her feet. Jenny charges at her...and runs right into a European uppercut from Confusia! The bizarre competitor grabs onto Jenny's wrist to prevent her from falling to the mat, before pulling her into a double-underhook position. Confusia then lifts Jenny and starts to spin around... COACH This looks kind of like a butterfly giant swing... The crowd counts along with the rotations after the third one... FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! Confusia then falls backwards and tosses Adams, completing the spinning butterfly suplex. But instead of going for the logical cover, Confusia turns Jenny over onto her stomach once again. Adams tries reaching outward for both fan support and to get to the ropes, as Confusia weighs her down in an unorthodox manner: she does a headstand on Jenny's back. COLE That's different... CABOOSE Takes a hell of a lot of balance to do something like that! Confusia stays in that position for about five seconds...then hops up with her hands and tucks in, falling with a short senton onto the weakened small of Jenny's back! Adams lets out an audible screech from the pain. Confusia again follows up with a bizarre choice in strategy, going to the middle rope instead of going for a pin. Adams struggles to get up to her feet, holding her back while groggily rising. The crowd's cheering for her...and as soon as they start, it ends with a HARD double-stomp from the ropes onto Jenny's back as she's bent over! COACH I've never seen that one before! CABOOSE Wicked! Confusia gets to her feet and slaps both of her shoulders with the opposite hand, apparantly signalling something. She pulls Jenny up and hooks her arms in the butterfly position. Confusia then yells out "Uncanny Illusion Hammer!"... COLE Um...I think that's the name of this move. Confusia lifts Jenny up and starts to spin with her, going for her double-underhook Whirlybird (spinning over-shoulder bomb toss), known as the Uncanny Illusion Hammer. She spins around....and around...and around...but after the fifth rotation, Adams somehow wiggles out of position! She spins around, and brings Confusia down with an amazing out-of-nowhere Ace Crusher! COACH Didn't see THAT one coming! The crowd starts to clap along, with a very vocal section chanting "JENNY!", to try and give Jenny a second wind, as both competitors lay in a daze. The referee starts his count... 1... 2... 3.... Jenny starts to reach towards the ropes, looking to pull herself back into the fight... 4... 5... Confusia looks to be up to her knees... 6... Adams is nearly up, kneeling while leaning on the middle rope... 7... 8... Both competitors are back up. Confusia and Adams charge at each other...and Jenny nails a high spinning wheel kick! Confusia comes up, holding her jaw...and runs into a second spinning wheel kick. Both competitors back up, with Jenny holding her back again...but somehow guts out an impressive Arachnid Kick (spinning wheel kick with extra 180-degree twist)! Adams comes back up to her feet and throws her left hand up in the air, yelling "C'MON!" while still holding her back. Confusia stumbles up, Jenny charges at her and jumps while turning around, Confusia catches her in a wheelbarrow, but Jenny pushes off of the mat to give her the momentum to reverse that into a DDT! COLE Confusia just got spiked! Jenny pulls Confusia up by the hand and applies a wristlock, leading her to the ropes while doing so. Jenny then performs an Arabian press (top rope backflip, bouncing off with your thighs/BUTT instead of your feet), flipping herself so that she brings Confusia over with a flying headscissors! Confusia rolls back up to her feet and charges at Jenny again...only to run right into a thrust kick to the mid-section. Confusia goes down to all fours, as Jenny climbs onto her back...and performs a tabletop Shooting Star Press (SSP while on opponent's back)! She goes for the immediate pin! 1... 2... KICKOUT! Adams slaps the mat in frustration before coming back up to her feet, trying to mask her back pain. She waves her hand and yells at Confusia to "GET UP!" Confusia stumbles to her feet. Jenny charges at her with a clothesline, but Confusia ducks it, lifts Jenny, and drops her hard with a Blue Thunder Bomb! She keeps Jenny cradled for the pin... 1... 2... KICKOUT! Confusia yells something that no one understands and pounds the mat with both fists. She pulls Jenny up by the hair and quickly hooks her into a pumphandle position. Confusia lifts Jenny for something, but Adams catches some momentum and floats behind to reverse it into a crucifix cradle... 1... 2... KICKOUT! COACH Damn, that was close! Both competitors pop back up in shock of the quickness of the move, as Adams does performs a spinning back heeltrip to avoid Confusia's charge and send her down to the mat. Adams spins around, all in one motion, and hits a nice standing Shooting Star Press! Adams goes for the cover! 1... 2... KICKOUT! CABOOSE Jenny doesn't have enough weight on her body to hit that move and have it knock an opponent silly. Jenny then climbs the top rope, facing the crowd while doing so. Confusia stumbles to her feet, holding the left side of her mid-section. Adams launches off, going for a corkscrew moonsault press, but Confusia side-steps...and Jenny lands on her FEET! Confusia immediately charges her at stomach-level, all the way across the ring to the opposite corner! Adams goes into the 'buckles hard, as Confusia then lifts her to a seated position on the top turnbuckle. Confusia turns to face the other end of the ring and grabs Jenny's wrists. She brings her over for an Iconoclasm (wrist-pull overhead Michinoku slam)...but Jenny flips onto her feet! COLE She's a damned feline! Confusia couldn't sit down with the Iconoclasm, so Jenny's able to back up, hook Confusia's head, and go for the Asai DDT (standing Sliced Bread #2)...but Confusia grabs her in mid-move and spikes her with a Michinoku Driver! She cradles the legs... 1.... 2... TH...KICKOUT! CABOOSE Should have hooked the tights and the ropes... Confusia pulls Jenny up and goes for a suplex. But, Jenny wiggles out again, this time landing on her feet in front of Confusia, and nails a loud-impacting dropsault to the jaw! Confusia stumbles into the corner while holding her jaw, upon rising to her feet. Adams, still holding her back in pain, charges at Confusia. But, Confusia dodges and Adams goes chest-first into the turnbuckle! Confusia charges in immediately with a clothesline to the shoulderblade region. Confusia follows up with a series of standing clotheslines, each more hard-hitting, to Adams' back. Confusia then yanks Adams down by the hair, with Confusia bending her knee so that Jenny lands on the edge of her kneecap! COACH Oooh....kind of a hairpull backbreaker there, eh? Confusia follows up by...inexplicably clotheslining the top turnbuckle repeatedly, like she did to Jenny. The referee yells at her to stop...and she gets right up in his face, yelling back twice as loud in, again, inaudible tongues. Confusia then turns, sticks both fists in the air, and again yells "Uncanny Illusion Hammer!" She pulls Jenny up again and butterflies her arms. Confusia goes to lift her...and Adams is able to land on her feet in front of Confusia! Adams flows that right into a front double leg trip, right into the Alligator Press (attacker folds opponent so that her ankles are down near her shoulders and leans down on her with all of her body to keep her down)... 1... 2... THREE! The crowd rises! BUFFER Your winner of the contest and advancing to the OAOAST Women's Title Match at the Great Angle Bash....JENNY AAAAADAAAAMMMMS! Almost the entire crowd is on their feet, applauding not just Jenny's win, but both athletes in one heck of a bout. COLE What a match...shocked the hell out of not only us, but the crowd, preconditioned to large, silicon breasts and little clothing....got themselves one HELL of a match out of these two ATHLETES. COACH It couldn't hurt matters that these two busted out some really impressive athletic manuevers...how about that sequence at the beginning of the match? (Camera follows a worn-out, hurt Adams, still clutching her back, up the ramp) CABOOSE You know...I thought Confusia had it in the bag! She was pullin' hair, chokin'...all the necessary tools to make it as a star, in my eyes! COLE Winners never cheat, and cheaters never win! Jenny Adams, advancing to the OAOAST Women's Title Four-Way-Dance, coming up on June 26th at the Great Angle Bash! More great women's action in the weeks to come! More HeldDOWN~! action on the way! (FADE OUT) ANOTHER COMMERCIAL? WELL, WE WOULDN'T BOMBARD YOU WITH THEM IF YOU JUST BOUGHT STUFF!! GO! BUY! NOW! (FADE IN) A deep, slow voiced man yells out “LIGHTNING CREW!” alerting the crowd on who is coming out next. The crowd stands up and boos loudly as the opening to “No Chance In Hell” plays. Smoke fills the entranceway. COLE And it looks like we’re about to be greeted by The Lightning Crew. COACH I wonder who’ll come out? A lightning bolt hits the entrance, and “No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Boyds starts playing while The Lightning Crew entrance video plays on the AngleTron. After a few seconds, the entrance doors slide open, and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez comes out through the smoke. The crowd gives Lindsay a mixed reaction. Lindsay just smirks at the crowd. COLE Hey, Lindsay’s out here by herself! Since when does that happen? CABOOSE She must have something to say concerning her own career, because if you remember, PRL promised her that she would have her own career in the OAOAST, and not just be his valet. COLE Yeah, right. CABOOSE It’s true. It’s true. KURT ANGLE It’s damn true. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez stands on the entrance stage with her right hand on her hip, and carrying a microphone. She has her hair up, and is wearing a necklace, earrings, a gray and black sleeveless shirt, bracelets, black leather pants, and black heels. She laughs at the crowd. COACH Oh boy. I can’t wait to hear her voice. She has such a sexy accent! I love Hispanic women! MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ Cut my music! “No Chance In Hell” dies down. The crowd is buzzing. MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ Now, I’m sure all you men here in San Francisco, well maybe not all of them, but some of you men here in San Francisco would love it if I…oh I don’t know…maybe danced a bit. The crowd cheers. Lindsay shakes her hips. COACH I know I would. LINDSAY And I’m sure you men would like it if I came out here in a little, skimpy bikini, right? CROWD Yeah! COACH That would be great too! LINDSAY And I bet you would all love it if I just took all my clothes off until I was wearing nothing but my smile. The crowd cheers. Lindsay pulls her shirt low enough to show her bra strap. COACH Oh God, yes! Yes! LINDSAY Well, you’re not going to get any of that! That’s not going to happen tonight. That’s not going to happen any night! CROWD BOOOOOO! COACH BOOOOOO! LINDSAY I am going to become serious now! No more stripping! I came to the OAOAST to be somebody, not just to be PRL’s valet! My time has come! The crowd boos her. LINDSAY Boo all you want. That won’t change anything. Because I will become the queen of the OAOAST Women’s Division! Sure, I may not be apart of the tournament to crown the new Women’s Champion, but rest assure, I WILL have that belt around my sexy waist real soon! You can bet on it! COLE Lindsay is pretty cocky isn’t she? CABOOSE You have to be cocky to survive in the OAOAST. Our women’s division is full of some pretty tough chicks. LINDSAY So, sure, these girls might be tough, but they wait until they face me. The Latina Bitch. The First Lady of The Lightning Crew! Yo, when they face me, those putas will get bitch slapped back to wherever they came from! So, if any female OAOAST superstar wants to step up, go ahead. I will be the one on top, because my name is Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez, and I will soon be the One And Only AngleSault Thread Women’s Champion! Now hit my music! “No Chance In Hell” starts up again. Lindsay blows kisses to the crowd, who respond by booing her. She waves goodbye, and exits through the entrance. COLE Lindsay Gonzalez has just announced she is gunning for the OAOAST Women’s Championship. CABOOSE Isn’t this awesome! Our women’s division just got 100 times better! The OAOAST women’s division officially smokes the women’s division of that *other* wrestling company. COLE Well, I think our women’s division already smoked the competition before Lindsay came onboard. CABOOSE Shut up. Cut to Sofa Central with Michael Cole, Jonathon “The Coach” Coachman, and Caboose. COACH Oh man. I can’t wait to see Lindsay wearing tights! With her sweet ass, that’s going to be a sight to see! CABOOSE Amen. Caboose and Coach high-five each other. They realize what they did, and move away from each other. CABOOSE I feel so dirty. COACH Me too. CABOOSE Yuk. COLE Is that Redman, smack yo' bitch up dirty? Or Christina Aguilera 'hey, guys, look at my thong' dirty? CABOOSE Take a wild guess... COLE ...after this break, Tag Team Title action. Ska8er Boiz looking to survive, as well as retain, against Hell's Hitmen! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 10, 2005 (edited) BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is set for one fall and is for the OAOAST World Tag Team championship! CUE: "Hit Me Verdi One More Time" The lights dim red. Out from around the entranceway appears a small cloud of black smoke. Through the smoke emerge Hell's Hitmen. JINGUS and The Sadist powerwalk to the ring, gesturing "the belt around waist". BUFFER Introducing first, the challengers. From the Depths of Hell, weighing a total combine weight of 687 pounds, JINGUS and The Sadist... HELL'S HITMEN! The monsters step over the top rope and intimidate ring announcer Michael Buffer and U.K. Hall of Fame referee Sir Miles Manchester. COLE Hell's Hitmen come into the match as the overwhelming favorites to dethrone The Sk8ter Boiz for the OAOAST World Tag Team championship. Their awesome size and weight advantage being one of the key reasons. Hell's Hitmen were most recently emboiled in a feud over the HI-YAH International Tag Team Titles with The Love Doctors. They've been doing a lot of competing overseas in HI-YAH and other Far East and European promotions. Including a trip to the Middle East for a series of matches against KABOOM Tag Team champions, the much hated All-American Boys. Unlike here in the U.S., The All-American Boys are actually one of the most despised teams overseas. Back to Michael Buffer. "Hit Me Verdi One More Time" is replaced by Green Day's "Boulevard Of Broken Dreams" which sends the crowd into a frenzy for a tag team who are really beginning to capture the hearts and minds of fans around the world with their underdog attitude. The stage is lit up in yellow, green pryoSHOOTING from the stage. A bit timid -- and who wouldn't be going up against two monsters in Hell's Hitmen -- the Boiz carefully make their way to the ring. The Marv doesn't even ride his skateboard to the ring, he just clutches it close to his chest. He screams when a fan reaches over the railing and places her hand on his shoulder, getting to touch a OAOAST superstar. Hell Mel having to snap his brother back into it, slapping him. The Sadist getting worked up in the ring. BUFFER And their opponents. From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, weighing 345 pounds, the OAOAST World Tag Team champions... THE SK8TER BOIZ! CABOOSE Those are our World Tag Team champions. Look at them. They've conceded defeat before defeat has beaten them. COACH Is that an English proverb? Because, you know, The Coach has been thinkin' about it, and I realized I'm actually an Englishman. CABOOSE You are? COACH Yeah, because I speak english. So that makes me an Englishman. Sony, The Coach wants it known I'm down with playing 007 himself. It's time the people have brother Bond. As a matter of fact, I'm gonna hit up the OAOAST Films Chairman and pitch a new secret agent. Jonathan Coachman, The Coach. Who am I? "My name's Coach, The. The Coach." Duty: to please all the ladies, baby. COLE Perhaps the most unlikely team to ever hold the OAOAST World Team Team championship, The Sk8ter Boiz are admitted underdogs. They don't have the wrestling ability of teams such as former two-time OAOAST World Tag Team champions Black T and the New New Midnight Express, who they defeated to capture the titles at School's Out. They rely on speed and high-impact, high-risk maneuvers. We're going to take a quick look back at how this match came about. It all started while The Sk8ter Boiz were being presented a cake by their old elementary school teacher Mrs. O'Green's 5th grade class. HeldDOWN~! June 2, 2005 Courtesy: OAOAST Home Entertainment CORNETTE Oh, and by the way, good luck in your first title defense next week. THE MARV Whoa! Whatcha talkin' 'bout Corny? CORNETTE You guys don't know? Heh. Here. This is for you. Cornette pulls out a LETTER and hands it to Hell Mel. The Boiz look over the letter. HELL MEL This is dated Tuesday. CORNETTE I know. And I'm sorry for that. Really. As you guys know, if the reigning champions happen to lose their titles before they can complete their scheduled title defenses, then the new champions take those bookings. In order to keep my New New Midnight Express competing at the highest of levels, I had signed a match between them and Hell's Hitmen for tonight. Unfortunately, as hard as this is for me to admit, the better team won at School's Out, and Sarcastic Simon and Narcissistic Ned deeply regret not being able to showcase their skills against that powerhouse tag team. Hey. Don't worry. I pulled a few strings with the corporate BUTT-kissers at OAOAST Headquaters, and I got them... Well, they denied my requests, saying I was trying to sabotage with your reign. Now you know I would never do a thing like that. But due to the massive beating my New New Midnight Express layed on you Sunday night, brass moved your match back a week, that way you have time to heal and prepare. THE MARV Jiminey Jillekers. We. Are. Screwed! CORNETTE (giggling) Or an entire week to live in fear. You're dead men walking. (laughs) Congratulations, champs! HELL MEL Say Jim, why don't you join us for a slice of cake, huh? Since we're "dead men walking," join the condem in their final...public...meal. CORNETTE Oh, all right. Cornette picks up a paper plate. THE MARV Ready to dig in? CORNETTE I'm ready. I want a big slice. HELL MEL Attack! CORNETTE Wha.... The Sk8ter Boiz RAM Cornette's face INTO THE CAKE! His face now covered in cholocate... The Boiz with a DOUBLE DROPKICK that sends Cornette tumbling over the boy... The New New Midnight Express hit the ring... The Boiz and the Midnights slug it out... The Midnights gain control by RAKING the eyes. They try to ram the Boiz head-first into the table, but The Marv and Hell Mel block it with their hands... then ram them into the table! They whip the Midnights to the ropes and clothesline them over the top to the floor. The Sk8ter Boiz celebrate in the ring as the crowd and Mrs. O'Green's 5th grade class go wild. COLE Jim Cornette is real fortunate that the New New Midnight Express did not end up having to face Hell's Hitmen. I wonder how he would of weasled his way out of that one had the Midnights retained. CABOOSE He'd just wield some that smoky mountain magic. COACH You know, guys, as impressive The Sk8ter Boiz have been, they also have this split-personality. One minute they're confident, the next they're "screwed," as The Marv likes to say. They oughta contact A-Rod's shrink. These boys have issues. They're giving up 342 pounds, not to mention lacking a few inches in height and below the waist if you catch The Coach's drift. COLE The Devilman, JINGUS, outweighs the Boiz combine! And The Sadist is just 25 pounds less than the Nerdlys. Either the Boiz will continue their string of upsets, or the Hitmen are gonna slaughter them and walk out with the World Tag Team Titles. We might see two title changes here tonight. Tony Brannigan will have another opportunity to face Axel for the OAOAST Championship, having accepted Axel's open challenge last week. Jesse "The Body" Ventura will be doing color commentary for that one. CABOOSE I have a question, Cole. Are we supposed to shout JINGUS, or is it like Kronik's backwards "K" -- just a special effect? COLE That's the name it's spelled. From their respective corners of the ring Hell's Hitmen and The Sk8ter Boiz stare each other down. The snarling Hitmen intimidating the pimply-faced, multipule personality Boiz. "BOIZ!" "BOIZ!" "BOIZ!" The Marv and Hell Mel are in complete awe as they watch JINGUS step over the top rope and onto the apron with little effort. Hell Mel pats his brother on the BUTT and wishes him the best of luck, but The Marv doesn't want to start the match. The Canadians decide a game of rock, paper, scissors is the way to figure that out. Hell Mel calls rock, The Marv scissors. Both scratch their heads, not because of the dandruff, but rather neither remembering which wins out. COLE Alright, you guys are color commentators. Is it rock or scissors? CABOOSE I had very little use for childish games such as that in my life. COACH I'd guess rock because all the girls say The Coach has two of the-- COLE Thank you for that useless bit of information, Coach. COACH Hey, my man, don't be ashamed. When it comes to The Coach and his rocks, everyone has penis envy. CABOOSE Are we still on the air? "You're older. You win," Hell Mel tells The Marv, citing his being one-minute younger. Hell Mel congratulates The Marv and exits. * DING DING * The Marv rubs the back of his neck, sweating profusely. He closes his eyes and locks up with The Sadist in the center of the ring. The violent shrieking of the sadistatic, cannibalistic madman sends chills up the spines of all in attendence and watching on TSM. Unable to budge the 320 sadist, The Marv breaks and nails The Sadist with a right hand. No effect. The Sadist giggles sadistically and kicks Marv in the midsection. A couple of kicks and right hands later, The Marv is whipped to the ropes. He avoids a big boot and swinging lariat, and takes the big man down with FLYING FOREARM shot between the eyes. Before referee Manchester can get down to make the count, The Sadist BENCH PRESSES The Marv up into the air! The Marv lands on his feet and throws a stiff kick to the spine of the back as The Sadist sits up. The Sadist rises to his feet and grabs The Marv by the throat, slapping him across the chest! "WHOOOOOOOO!" COLE Did you hear that? COACH Abso-frickin'-lutely. Whooooooo! COLE Not that! The chop. It sound like a gunshot went off in the arena. Stiff as hell. CABOOSE Like the way I carry you and Coachman each week. The Marv tip-toes around the ring, clutching his chest, his screams sending The Sadist in an orgasmic-like trance. The Marv sucks it up and to the cheers of the crowd retaliates with a knife-edge chop of his own. "WHOOOOOOOO!" * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOO!" The Sadist gleefully smiles. COACH He likes it, Mikey. He really likes it! * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOO!" COLE The Sadist is calling for more! "Hit me baby one more time," he's asking. * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOO!" The Sadist busts a move straight out of a Britney Spears music video as he beats his own face and chest. Hyperventing, The Marv is on the verge of keeling over as The Sadist nears, foaming from the mouth. His eyes light up as he's assaulted by a combination of rights, lefts, kicks, and chops. And just like that, The Sadist lifts Marv in the air and slams him to the mat. Military Press Slam. The Sadist gets some good air as he comes off the ropes with a big legdrop. Cover made. ONE... TWO... TH-- KICKOUT. Irish whip. Somoan Drop. The Sadist covering The Marv very lazily, just leaning against him. ONE... TWO... The Marv with a Crucifix, rolling The Sadist over. ONE... TWO... THR-- NO, KICKOUT! The Sadist rises to his feet and hits an STO (clothesline/legsweep combo). A tag is made. JINGUS stomps The Marv like an ant, picking him up and easily slamming him to the mat. JINGUS hits the ropes and crashes (with a big splash) all his 365 pounds down on The Marv. COLE You could feel all the air being knocked out of The Marv. He's giving up 205 pounds to Jingus. The cover. ONE... TWO... TH-- KICKOUT! CABOOSE There's actually some intelligent -- well, maybe not so intelligent -- life-form still there. COLE You speak of The Sk8ter Boiz as if they're aliens. "Life-form"? COACH They are from Canada, M.C. COLE And so is Crystal. COACH Oh yeah, hit me where it hurts, right? Ya know, if I really wanted your job bad enough, I could have it next week. COLE You talk whack smack. COACH Holla that by me uno mas, por favor. CABOOSE We don't even need Hugo anymore. We got Latin Coach! Sorry Hugo. JINGUS holds Marv up, punishing him with right hands. He takes a few steps back and charges with a YAKUZA KICK -- but The Marv rolls through and makes the TAG to Hell Mel. The crowd comes alive, as Hell Mel leaps to the top rope and catches The Devilman turning around with a SHOOTING STAR DOUBLE-AXHANDLE! "HOLY SHIT!" "HOLY SHIT!" "HOLY SHIT!" A MOTHER holds up a sign in the front row: "THINK OF THE CHILDREN!" The Sadist enters. Hell Mel meets him head-on, taking him over with a headscissors takedown. Then he measures up The Sadist with a standing dropkick that sends him through the ropes to the outside. Hearing the rumbling footsteps of JINGUS, Hell Mel ducks underneath a clothesline attempt and gets backdropped over the top rope as he ricochets off the ropes -- but lands safely on the apron. JINGUS doubles over after Hell Mel rams his shoulder into his midsection, then flips over The Devilman, clotheslining him over the top rope! The Sk8ter Boiz hit the ropes, picking up a full head of steam, and dive through the top and middle ropes, taking both Hitmen over the guardrailing -- and knocking over a middle-age man, who spills his beer on himself -- with a pair of PLANCHAS that garner another round of "HOLY SHIT" chants! COLE This is the type of action you can expect at OAOAST events around the world. But it's not a televised event you say? Whether it's front of 50 fans or 50,000 fans OAOAST superstars bust their butts each and every night they're in the ring. CABOOSE Alfdogg owes me a job. COLE You get paid good money just to speak a couple of lines every match. Back to this great action. CABOOSE Uh, I wasn't actually... Bastard. Hell Mel pulls the railing in closer to the ring, while The Marv uses a fan's chair to clobber JINGUS over the back and bash it through The Sadist's head. The Sk8ter Boiz leap to the middle rope and land on Hell's Hitmen with stereo ASAI MOONSAULTS in the crowd! "O-A-O-A-S-T" "O-A-O-A-S-T" "O-A-O-A-S-T" The fans keep chanting "O-A-O-A-S-T!" until realizing how bad it sounds. The Boiz choose to play a game of "Press Your Luck", going up once more for Asai Moonsaults, but they get a double whammy as they're caught in mid-air. Snake Eyes on the guardrail. JINGUS steps over the railing and Hot Shots Hell Mel from the arena floor on the top rope! Luckily for Hell Mel, he manages to slump on the middle rope as he slid down from the top. JINGUS re-enters the ring and takes Hell Mel back with him with a suplex from the apron. JINGUS delivers an awesome FROG SPLASH off the top, getting a good 8-10 feet up in the air. He makes the cover and hooks the leg. ONE... TWO... THRE-- NO, SHOULDER UP! COLE How did Hell Mel do that? I thought for sure that was it. This team -- This underdog team is fun to watch. They may not be the biggest, they may not have the best entrance in the OAOAST, but they have ton of heart. And they're showing it tonight. The Sadist enters the ring and climbs to the top as JINGUS sets Hell Mel up for a powerbomb. The prelude to the top rope clothesline, the Hitmen's double-team finisher Vaya con Dois. The Marv returns from the dead and shoves The Sadist off the top, who bumps JINGUS on the way down, allowing Hell Mel to reverse the powerbomb into a HURRICARANA! CABOOSE Don't tell me they're going to get lucky again. ONE... The Sadist tries re-entering the ring, but The Marv pulls him out and hits him over the head with his SKATEBOARD. CABOOSE Disqualification! TWO... THREE! * DING DING DING * COLE BOIZ WIN! BOIZ WIN! BOIZ WIN! BUFFER The winners and STILL OAOAST World Tag Team champions... THE SK8TER BOIZ! The Marv sprints over to the timekeepers table and grabs the belts. He and Hell Mel quickly run off to the back celebrating, not wanting to get caught by the Hitmen. The Sadist makes a play for referee Miles Manchester, but the 62-year-old official gets out of harm's way just in time. CABOOSE He wasn't the legal man! COLE Yes he was. COACH I think 'Boosy means JINGUS had the shoulder up. COLE No. CABOOSE I meant he had his foot on the ropes. COLE He most certainly did not. COACH Hell Mel was holding onto the ropes. COLE He wasn't anywhere near the ropes. Lady luck continues to be on the side of The Sk8ter Boiz. Congratulations to them. CABOOSE For cheating? COLE Fans, as if we even needed to remind you, still to come -- Tony Brannigan vs. Axel, World Heavyweight Title on the line. That and much more when the highest-rated wrestling program on Thursday nights returns! "YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" The crowd roars at the camera flashing back to the locker room, catching Axel shadow boxing in front of a wall. The OAOAST Heavyweight Champion is the epitome of intensity tonight, looking to try and defend his belt against Tony Brannigan for the second time since he's had the gold. The vision of Axel's shadow is suddenly broken up by three other shadows stepping into the image. Three dark shadows. The camera whirls around -- to find Drek Stone, Scotty Static, and Johnny Jackson standing united. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" With a scowl, Axel stares down these three men for a few seconds before addressing them. AXEL What the hell do you want? Expecting this hostile response, none of the men seem particularly phased. They stare down at Axel for a few moments, until Drek Stone is the man to step up first and speak. DREK You're in trouble tonight, Axel. AXEL Trouble? DREK Yeah, trouble. AXEL What kind of trouble? Johnny Jackson steps forward this time. JACKSON Do you realize what you're doing tonight? The kind of trap you're getting ready to step into? AXEL I realize exactly what I'm doing tonight. I'm stepping out to that ring to defend my title against Tony Brannigan once again. I did it once at Living Anglelously. And I'm going to do it again. I don't need you to remind me of that. With a sigh, Scotty Static shakes his head. STATIC Are you serious? Don't you realize times have changed since that match two months ago? There's a different climate here. The storm clouds are brewing, Axel. And if you don't watch yourself, the hurricane could start tonight. AXEL Look, I don't need this. I can see you guys are on some kind of mission here to get rid of some of these guys. If this is what you want to do, whatever. I don't care. All I care about is defending my title. You can leave me out of everything else. DREK You're not understanding this! This involves all of you. This involves all of us. We're all in trouble tonight. This Heavyweight Title match between you and Tony is bigger than just the belt. It's bigger than some piece of gold. It can predict the very course the OAOAST enters on. Looking frustrated, Axel swipes a hand through his hair. STATIC We don't like you, Axel. None of us do. Me and Johnny? JACKSON Yeah, we hate you. STATIC Right. And Drek? DREK You took that title away from me. I don't just hate you. I loathe you. STATIC Okay? You got the point yet? We don't like you. But we respect you. We respect you for your talent. And we respect you for what you're doing with that title. Which is why we want to make sure it doesn't leave your shoulder. JACKSON Tony can NOT walk out of here with the Heavyweight Title. Him. Black. Zack. Some Guy. Any of them. Their time has come and gone. Any chance they have to hold the belt again is simply counterproductive. We're about bringing a new era to the OAOAST. And if Tony happens to win the belt tonight, it puts our entire idea into jeopardy. Guys like us -- me, you, Scotty, Drek -- we're all hurt if a geezer like Tony wins the title. We'll all be forgotten as they continue their stranglehold on the Main Event. DREK So here's the plan. Tony, Black, Zack.....they realize how important this match is tonight. They know how important it is for Tony to finally win the belt. They realize something no one else in the locker room has realized yet. And as a result, they're going to do anything to make sure they're successful. STATIC Anything. JACKSON Absolutely anything. DREK Don't put it past them. So what we're doing is offering you our services for tonight. They'll have tricks up their sleeves. Well, we have your back. We're going to make sure they don't do anything shady. Axel, I am making you a promise here. We are going to make sure you walk out of HeldDown tonight with the Heavyweight Title still around your.... AXEL STOP! The piercing demand of Axel stops Drek in mid-sentence. All three men stare at Axel with a confused look as he cracks his fists together. AXEL Stop right there. Let me make something completely clear to you punks right now. I do not want your help tonight. I'm not a part of your cause, and I want nothing to do with it. You say Tony is going to have a backup plan tonight? Let him bring it on! I took care of Dan Black when I faced Tony last time. And I'll do the same thing tonight. Leave me out of whatever war you're planning. I want nothing to do with that -- or any of you. With a sigh, Drek tries speaking some sense into Axel quickly. DREK Axel....you don't realize what you're doing. Take our offer now, or you'll be sorry..... AXEL I'll be sorry? Drek. Static. Jackson. You can all take this offer and shove it up your asses! STAY OUT OF MY MATCH TONIGHT! With those final words, the crowd collectively roars as Axel stomps out of the locker room. Meanwhile, all Drek, Scotty, and Jax can do is shake their heads slowly. JACKSON ....ugh, what a huge mistake. STATIC You know what? Let him make this mistake. It's time he finally sees the big picture. It's time he comes to realize what exactly is going on here. Drek continues to stare at the doors Axel just exited through, looking more disappointed than anything else. DREK He will. Michael Buffer is standing by in the ring as we return, ready to take us straight to the action on everyone's favorite Thursday wrasslin' show. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is scheduled for one fall! The lights tint, and a dim blue hue engulfs the arena, as "Plug In Baby" begins to play. After the song plays for several moments, the arena is lit up by the burst of pyro that signals the entrance of the "Crown Jewel" of the OAOAST and her bodyguard. Crystal comes out with held held high, and the powerful Gunner Sharps lurks slowly behind her, both en route to the ring for what is sure to be a hard-hitting contest. BUFFER Introducing team number one. First, from Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at 375 lbs., this is GUNNNNNNNERRRRRR SHARRRRRRPSSSSS! His tag team partner, hailing from Coquitlam, BC, Canada, weighing in at 150 lbs., she is the "Crown Jewel", CRRRRYSSSSTALLLLL! Crystal slides into the ring and gets up on the ropes, brushing off her detractors as Gunner steps over the ropes and stalks across the ring. Buffer looks up at the intimidating force before him and quickly looks away, stumbling through his next introduction. BUFFER An...and the...their opponents... The wailing guitar of Papa Roach is cued up, and the fans leap to their feet, as "Getting Away With Murder" brings the company Franchise and his tag team partner, a fellow OAOAST Original, onto the entrance ramp where they are greeted by a loud pop. BUFFER First, hailing from Boston, MA- COLE Wait! Look out! Cole's shouting can't be heard up the aisleway, as he's taken by surprise at the appearance of the Global Party Exchange, who jump Zack and Some Guy from behind! Jax knocks Malibu to the floor and puts the boots to him, while Static takes Some Guy by the head and hurls him into the security railing back first, then puts him on his back after repeated punches! With Some Guy dazed, Static moves over to Malibu and helps his partner bring him up, each one holding Malibu by the arms...which is Drek Stone's cue to come out from the back. CABOOSE This was a set up! Stone comes out, getting in the woozy Malibu's face as he's held at bay by the GPX. Stone leans in close, tauntingly patting Malibu's cheek before rearing back and delivering a soccer kick to the stomach that knocks the wind out of Malibu. The GPX pull him back up, not giving him room to breathe. The cameras get in close, and Stone holds Malibu by the jaw, looking into his eyes and telling him "times are changing" very ominously before nodding to the GPX. Static and Jax throw Zack down, and road agents and other assorted OAOST cast members come rushing out of the back. Drek and the GPX throw their hands up in mock surrender, then stroll past everyone, walking to the back proud of themselves, while Crystal and Gunner enjoy what they see from the ring. COLE Fans, we've got a tag match planned, but who knows what's going to happen now. We're gonna take a break and come right back with more HeldDOWN~! after this. (FADE OUT) WHY AREN'T YOU BUYING STUFF YET!?! (FADE IN) HeldDOWN~! returns, and when we get back we see Zack Malibu being sent to the ropes, the boot of Gunner Sharps driven into his jaw and knocking him onto his back. COLE Welcome back fans. If you just tuned in we've got a tag match underway, but prior to the break, as Some Guy and Zack Malibu were making their entrance, they were jumped by the Global Party Exchange and Drek Stone. Stone has targetted Malibu in recent weeks, and has aligned with the GPX for reasons that are still unclear. The only thing we know is that Malibu and other OAOAST Originals have been a target of the group, and tonight fell victim to a cowardly sneak attack. CABOOSE There's nothing worse than a man, or in this case, men, who don't come at you head on. People may say I'm biased due to my affiliation with Zack and Some Guy, but the attitudes of the GPX and Drek show nothing but cowardice and shortcuts. When they come at Zack, or Black T, or whoever head on, that's when the respect they want will start getting dished out. Some Guy, just as weary as Zack, watches on as Gunner pulls Zack up after the boot and blasts him with a short arm clothesline, then pulls him back up and blasts him with a second. Gunner pulls Zack up a third time and this time scoops him up, holding him on his shoulder before releasing him, violently slamming Zack on the canvas. Crystal nods approvingly from the corner as Gunner puts his boot across Zack's throat and pushes down, stepping on it and cutting off his air supply. Referee Earl Hebner scolds Gunner and tells him to break, but the big man waits until the five seconds are up before taking his foot off Zack's throat. Malibu rolls onto his stomach and begins coughing, trying to suck some air back into his body, but he's brought to his feet by Gunner and sent to the corner. Gunner charges, but his size and weight keep him from moving at a quick enough speed to capitalize, as Malibu jumps up and plants both feet in his chest, driving him backwards. Malibu quickly hops up on the second rope and dives at Gunner, but he's caught in a bearhug by the big man. Malibu squirms, and finally rakes both of Gunner's eyes, and once Sharps let's go Zack starts kicking at his leg, focusing on the knee and trying to chop the big tree from Detroit down to size. Zack throws one kick too many and Gunner catches the leg, but Malibu jumps up and uses his free leg to kick Gunner in the midsection and keel him over. Zack rolls backwards to come up to his feet, and with Gunner hunched over takes him in and starts ramming his knee into the temple of the big man, driving it into his head repeatedly until Gunner falls to one knee, which is when Zack backs away from him and runs the ropes, getting some momentum behind him as he delivers a dropkick to the chin of Sharps that puts him down for the first time this match! COLE Zack's got Gunner down, and now...he makes the tag! Malibu, thinking quickly, gets Some Guy in the ring and together they pull their foe to his feet. Zack and SG each stand on a side of Gunner and grab hold of him, and together lift him off his feet, rocking him with a double team back suplex! CABOOSE There you go, guys. Keep him down, keep him grounded. Malibu retreats to the apron, while Some Guy mounts the shoulders of Gunner and hammers away, pounding on his temple with a closed fist. Hebner warns Some Guy and that's enough to get the dancing Bostonian off of Sharps, but SG maintains control, sending Gunner to the ropes and leaping up for a dropkick...that gets swatted away! Some Guy immediately gets up and charges at Gunner, but Sharps throws his arm out and catches Some Guy, lifting him off his feet and dropping him with a side slam! Some Guy has the wind knocked out of him, and with her opponent down, Crystal calls for Gunner to make the tag. COACH Here comes my ba...I mean, uh... CABOOSE Jesus Coachman, aren't you over it yet? The crowd boos loudly as Crystal comes through the ropes, pulling Some Guy up and rocking him with European uppercuts. Crystal backs him against the ropes and sends him in, but Some Guy reverses in mid-whip and sends Crystal for the ride, although she slides through his legs on the rebound. Some Guy turns around and gets carried over with a deep arm drag by the former World Champion, and as he comes up she leaps up onto him for a rana...but he holds on! Knowing she's in danger, Crystal starts punching at the forehead of Some Guy, and finally rakes the eyes unbeknowst to the ref to escape his clutches! Some Guy drops Crystal to her feet and staggers back blindly, but she takes him in and snaps him over with a suplex, then pops up to her feet and goes and nails Zack, trying to draw him into the ring! COLE She's trying to sucker Zack in! Malibu is completely aware of what Crystal is trying to do, so he remains on the apron, wiping his lip and staring at the Female Phenom, who calls him on. Malibu just shrugs and smirks, drawing the ire of Crystal because of his hesitation, but it works in his favor, as Some Guy gets up and spins her around... SMACK! ...striking her with a chop to the chest! SMACK! Again! SMACK! Again! CABOOSE Haha...tell you what Coach, Some Guy keeps up with those strikes and she won't have much to look at. Crystal screeches in pain, but that doesn't stop her from being sent into the ropes, and getting pressed up into the air on the rebound. Some Guy holds her up, showing off some of his power, and he looks to Zack as he's holding Crystal. Malibu turns to the crowd, asking them if they want to see her get dropped, and the crowd responds loudly and unanimously. Crystal shakes her head no, trying to prevent her crash landing, but Some Guy tosses her out of his hands, dropping her on the canvas with a press slam! Crystal groans in pain as shockwaves go up her spine, and with her down, Some Guy goes towards his corner, which draws quite a response from the crowd. COLE Listen to these fans...they want to see Zack and Crystal hook up again. Some Guy offers his hand, and Malibu looks reluctant to accept it. "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" Hearing the cheers of the fans is all he needs, as Malibu reaches over and slaps the hand of Some Guy. Zack steps into the ring and waits behind Crystal who has her back turned. She gets up and turns around, and Malibu is looking right at her, smirking. Crystal backs away, but then looks disgusted by Malibu's arrogance towards her and comes forward, and the two lock up for the first time in months! COLE The hottest feud of 2004 is alive and well in 2005! Crystal quickly grabs a headlock, but Malibu shoves her towards the ropes and carries her over with a hiptoss, only to have her land on her feet! They lock up again and she takes him to the mat with a headlock takedown, but he scissors his legs around her head and breaks free. Both come up to their feet and lock up again, and this time he grabs the headlock, only for her to counter with a back suplex...which he floats through, landing on his feet! He grabs a rear waistlock but she counters, spinning into one of her own, then spins him around so that they're face to face, locking up again. She goes for a double leg takedown, but Malibu reaches down and grabs her by the waist, pulling her all the way up onto his shoulders for a powerbomb...but Crystal hits a rana to counter! Zack gets up and is met with a dropkick, but swats it away, then tries one of his own which gets swatted away, and the two come up to their feet and glare at each other, while the crowd cheers wildly for the efforts exerted. CABOOSE The more things change, the more they stay the same. The roles might be reversed, but these two are still two of the most gifted athletes we've ever seen, and certainly two of the greatest World Champions we've ever known! Crystal motions to Malibu to come lock up again, and as he approaches, she backsteps to her corner and slaps Gunner on the shoulder, shocking even the big man. Crystal points to Zack and gives orders for Gunner to tear him apart, but as he steps over the rope to enter, Malibu dropkicks Crystal into the ropes so that he winds up crotched! Zack then springs up to the top turnbuckle and dives off towards Gunner, extending his right arm out to clothesline the big man off the ropes, and both crash down to the floor! COLE Suicide move by Zack Malibu, but it's put Gunner Sharps down, which is not easy to do! Malibu tries to regroup, and as he does Crystal starts climbing the turnbuckles. Hebner tells her to get down, but she doesn't adhere to his warnings and keeps climbing, so Some Guy races into the ring and climbs up after her! The two of them start battling on the top rope, with Some Guy trying to prevent her from diving, and Crystal trying to knock him off the ropes. On the floor, both Malibu and Gunner are getting to their feet when they see Crystal and Some Guy on the top rope...AND CRYSTAL SUPERPLEXES SOME GUY DOWN DOWN DOWN ONTO MALIBU AND GUNNER! COLE HOLY CRAP! CABOOSE You're more polite than the fans, Cole. "HOLY SHIT!" "HOLY SHIT!" The chant goes up, and a replay shows the move in full detail, as the ringside camera only caught the tail end of it. As Some Guy was trying to pull Crystal down, she snared him in a headlock and quickly took him over, letting gravity work it's magic and drop him down onto her foe AND her own partner! All four bodies are scattered about at ringside, with Gunner taking Malibu and rolling him into the ring. The big man follows and immediately goes for the pin, figuring between moves like that and the prematch attack, Malibu is easy pickings. ONE! TWO! NO! Malibu kicks out, but Gunner keeps at him, picking him up and slamming forearms across his back before putting him in a standing headscissors and lifting him up, driving him into the canvas with a brutal snap powerbomb! Zack folds up like an accordion, and Gunner drops down for another cover. ONE! TWO! TH-NO! The second kickout in as many minutes begins to anger the monster, as he picks Malibu up and tosses him into the corner, then puts his boot into his throat and starts to choke him out. Malibu flails his arms, trying to remove the boot from his throat, but he and Hebner's efforts combined can't get the beast to stop. Gunner finally stops on his own accord and backs away, listening to Hebner tell him that he's not going to put up with anymore illegal shenanigans. Gunner keeps listening, but it's revealed to be him simply keeping Hebner occupied, as Crystal slides into the ring and rushes the corner, squashing Zack against the turnbuckle with a corner splash! Hebner sees it out of the corner of his eye and chases after her, but Crystal rolls out of the ring under the bottom rope! Zack staggers out of the corner, right into the grip of Gunner, who grabs him by the throat for a choke...NO! SOME GUY RUNS IN AND HITS THE SOMEKICK! GUNNER IS DAZED AND RELEASES THE GRIP! Malibu takes a minute to regain his composure, and seeing the giant teetering bolts forward, kicking his leg up... ...and CRACKING HIM WITH SCHOOL'S OUT! Hebner turns around just in time to see Zack fall on top of the giant, and dives to the mat to count the pin! ONE! TWO! THREE! DING! DING! DING! COLE I don't know how they pulled it off, but they did! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, here are your winners, ZACK MALIBU AND SOME GUY! CABOOSE Never count out two Originals like Malibu and Some Guy, Cole. Two guys like that, who have been through everything this company has thrown at them...they don't go down so easily. Some Guy, still woozy himself, helps Malibu up off Gunner, while Crystal shrieks and pounds on the Sofa Central announce table. Some Guy and Zack have their hands raised, but the victory celebration is not liked by the two men watching from the ramp...Scotty Static and Johnny Jax. The GPX look on with frowns, not happy that Malibu and Some Guy have survived this night. Zack and Some Guy stand near the ropes and look up the aisleway at them, and it's a tense moment between the four men before the GPX decide to walk to the back. Crystal tends to Gunner, but the big man is out cold. Some Guy hops to the floor, and Zack turns and looks at Crystal, who shoots him an icy cold glare to warn him that this isn't the last he's seen of her before he makes his exit. Together, the two Originals head up the aisleway, looking forward to some R&R. COLE A big win for two of the Originals here tonight, and coming up, Tony Brannigan could be in for the biggest win of them all. Could one of the Originals and one half of the greatest tag team in the OAOAST achieve singles glory and capture the biggest prize of all? Tony Brannigan meets Axel for the World Heavyweight Title when we come back, here on HeldDOWN~! Edited June 10, 2005 by King Cucaracha Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 10, 2005 The cameras open on a shot of Hoff in the backstage area, to a big round of cheers! Hoff stands in his street clothes, flanked by Miss Jackie Gayda, who holds a microphone. JACKIE Hoff, last week, it seemed as though you were made an offer of some sort by Drek Stone, your longtime rival. Can you elaborate on this at all? Hoff looks up, stroking his goatee as he thinks it over. The big man looks down at Jackie and says: HOFF Jackie, the fact is.......I have no idea what Drek Stone was rambling on about, and I don't *care* what Drek Stone was rambling on about. Now, we all know that there's something going down in this locker room. There's tension like we ain't ever SEEN before! Guys who used to be tighter than your tube top are turning against each other, and guys who wouldn't give each other the time of day are running around like a pack of wolves. Jackie looks down at her breasts as Hoff continues. HOFF Now it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out. There is a war coming. I don't know where, when, or why, but there are big things gonna go down real soon. There's only one thing I do know, and that is this. Hoff grabs the microphone, pulling it (along with Jackie's hand) closer and looking hard at the camera. HOFF Drek Stone, you and I are never gonna be on the same side. A cheer goes up from the audience! HOFF Drek, I may respect the hell out of you as a competitor in the ring, but as a person, I've got nothing but contempt for you. You stole something from me, and you used every dirty trick in the book to hang onto it. You brought shame to the title that I once wore with pride. You and I aren't friends, we ain't gonna be friends, and we sure as hell aren't teammates. So, Drek, you want to fight me, you can hit me with your best shot. You know where to find me. I'm the guy kicking ass in that ring each and every night. "HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF" JACKIE Hoff, what about the current World Title situation? Any thoughts? HOFF The "situation" is this. Axel is a friend of mine, and a hell of a champion. He's beaten everyone that he's come up against. When the time comes, when I get my shot, there's no one I'd rather face for the title. But in the end, it doesn't really matter who has the belt. Axel's got T-Bod tonight, and that means that Tony Brannigan could walk out of here as champion. If that happens, Tony, I hope you hear me loud and clear, because I am coming. "YEEEAAAHH!!!" HOFF See, it doesn't matter who I've got to beat, Jackie. I will go through anyone and everyone I have to to get my title back. I'll go through Axel. I'll go through Tony. I'll go through Dan Black if I have to. Crystal. Gunner Sharps. Hell, I'll go through this whole damn company! Drek Stone, Zack Malibu, CWM, I'll beat 'em all! The GPX! The SKATER BOIS! JOSH MATTHEWS, THE MACHO MAN, THE PUERTO RICAN, hell, THOMAS RODRIGUEZ!!! CSI, PETER KNIGHT, LEON RODEZ, CHRISTIAN WRIGHT, I DON'T CARE!! BRING RAGDOLL OUT OF RETIREMENT, AND I'LL KICK HIS ASS FROM HERE TO VEGAS!! I'll go to Mexico and beat Phoenix and his whole damn family! I'll go to Japan and tear HI-YAH a new a**hole!! I'll face God and Jesus and the Holy Spirit if I have to, and when they're done kicking my ass I'll STILL take on the whole damn locker room! There is no one, and there is nothing....absolutely, positively NOTHING...that will stop me from getting my World Title back. "HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF" HOFF And when it's all said and done, when the smoke has cleared, Axel will know, Tony will know, and they all will know......that the future......has......arrived. Hoff tosses the mic back to Jackie and, sparing one last glance at her lovely body with a smile, heads off. JACKIE ....whoa. Fade back to Sofa Central COLE Wow...Hoff, intense! On screen, a graphic appears for the upcoming OAOAST Heavyweight Title Match. As we go back to the arena, Caboose and Coach have gone, to be replaced by the one and only Jesse Ventura. COLE I'm now joined by our special guest commentator for our next match, Jesse "The Body" Ventura. Jess, our main event is up next, a rematch from Living Angleously. Tony Brannigan vs. Axel, the World Title on the line -- arguably the biggest match in the history of HeldDOWN~! It's been nearly 3 years since the OAOAST Championship last changed hands on television, when Alfdogg stunned Caboose July 22, 2002. Only a select few have had the honor of holding the most regarded championship in the world, the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title. Tonight, Tony Brannigan will attempt to add his name to the list. VENTURA That's right, Michael Cole. Brannigan put up one helluva fight at Living Angleously, coming close to winning the title on a number of occasions, but the champion managed to retain. I don't think the champion of the world is gonna be so lucky tonight. COLE Is there any one advantage you see either man having? VENTURA Without question, rest. Axel was in a grueling ladder match just two weeks ago. Some will say it's been two weeks, he's fully recovered by now. While I've never been in a ladder match, I can guarantee you that it has the same effect on you as a cage match. It takes weeks for your body to fully heal. Every slam, every fall to the mat and it feels like you're falling off the top of the ladder again. It's as much mental as it is physical, that's why I see Tony Brannigan getting it done tonight. COLE You can feel the buzz in the air. If I wasn't hairless, the hair on my arms would be standing up. Our main event is next. Enoy. “He’s Simply Ravishing…OWWWWWWW!” Tony Brannigan is met with a mixed reaction as he and Dan Black make their apperance onstage. Up the ring steps they go, calling for Earl Hebner to open up the ropes for them. Tony enters first, followed by Dan. Brannigan holds onto the top rope, nodding as Dan speaks. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! The crowd rise to their feet as "Eat You Alive" by Limp Bizkit hits, signaling the champion’s arrival. A fired up Axel, draped in his leather coat, emerges through a cloud of smoke, the OAOAST Title wrapped around his waist. He walks halfway down, points to both sides of the crowd, then the ring… BOOM! …and strikes the Crucifix Pose, setting off another blast of pyrotechnics. Axel walks up the ring steps and climbs into the squared circle, climbing a turnbuckle and striking the crucifix pose to the crowd. He climbs down and locks eyes with the challenger across the ring. * DING * DING * DING * DING * BUFFER This is our main event of the evening, set for one fall, for the Heavyweight Championship of the World! Sanction by the OAOAST Board of Directors and California state athletic commission. When the bell rings your referee in-charge of the action, senior official Earl Hebner. Are you ready? Wrestling fans, are you ready? “YYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!” BUFFER Then for the thousands in attendence and the millions watching live on TSM. Ladies and gentlemen, LLLLLLET'S GET READY TO RRRUMMMMBLLLLLLE! The crowd roars. The decimals going off the charts. BUFFER Introducing first, the challenger to my right. Wearing black with silver trim, accompanied to the ring by fellow Original Elite member "The Ice Heart" Dan Black, from Rancho Magnifico in Hollywood U.S.A., weighing in tonight at 272 1/2 pounds; a two-time Tag Team Champion of the World... TONY BRANNIGAN! Dan stands behind Tony and helps remove his sparking black and silver robe. Tony Brannigan treats us all to a double bicep pose and hip swivel, drawing more heel heat than cheers there. BUFFER His opponent to my left. Wearing black, from Tasmania, Australia, weighing 255 pounds, the reigning and defending professional wrestling Heavyweight Champion of the WOOOOOOOORLLLLLD… AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAXELLLLLLLLLLLL! Axel removes the OAOAST Title and holds it in the air by one hand. Tony Brannigan eying the belt from the corner. Earl Hebner takes control of the belt and holds it overhead, then handing it over to Michael Buffer who takes it back with him to his seat. Earl frisks both men for foreign objects. First Tony. All clear. Now Axel. Brannigan is booed mercilessly as he lunges over Hebner and tries to get in a sucker punch, but Axel blocks Tony's right and rocks him with one of his own. VENTURA Aw, what a cheapshot. Axel going on the offensive before the bell is even rung. * DING DING * COLE Now it is. Axel and Tony trade blows, with Axel gaining the upper hand. Brannigan takes a plunge. Axel steps forward but decides to hit the ropes instead, taking Brannigan out with a flying lariat. A dazed challenger rushes back to his feet, and is Irish whipped. Back bodydrop. Tony landing akwardly on his leg. Axel thrown outside as he neared Brannigan. Tony follows him out and gets met by uppercuts. Brannigan quickly putting an end to the rally by RAKING the eyes. The Champion rammed head-first into the ring apron, then whipped to the guardrail. Tony hammering away with right hands and forearm smashes to the jaw. The action returns to the ring. Brannigan off the top with a clubbering clothesline to the back of the neck. The cocky challenger is showered with boos as he swivel his hips and flex his muscles, grinning ear to ear. VENTURA Nobody wonder why they call this place the Cow Palace. Here you got Tony Brannigan showing everybody what a real man is supposed to look like, and he's gettin' booed. COLE I'm sure it has nothing to do with his arrogance. Brannigan drops a couple of forearms to the chest before going for the cover, only getting two. The expression on Tony's face goes from a grin to shock and horror as Axel counters his suplex. Brannigan manages to avoid a Harlem Sidekick, but gets leveled by a STRONG CLOTHESLINE! The cover. ONE... TWO... TH-- NO. Tony rolls on his belly to prevent himself from being covered again. Axel responds by clamping a front facelock. He brings Brannigan back to a vertical base, and Tony thanks him with bodyshots and knees to the ribs. Brannigan is finally able to free himself and nail Axel with a kneelift to the midsection. RUDE AWAKENING coming up! Axel fights it. Slowly but surely breaking Tony's grip, and then delivering a NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX! ONE... TWO... TH-- NO! Dan Black slides in the ring and pulls Tony away by both legs. The referee not seeing a thing, as he was staring at Tony's shoulders. Black casually strolls away, receiving some strong words from the World Champion. Earl keeps Axel at bay, saying he'll handle any outside influences. VENTURA That's the second time this week an Aussie has tried to bully somebody else. It's a good thing we have Tony here, Cole. We're protected under Brannigan's Law. That chump ain't gonna bully nobody around here. Brannigan from behind with a SCHOOL BOY, holding onto a handful of tights! Blind as a bat Hebner doesn't see it. ONE... TWO... THR-- NO, KICKOUT! Brannigan misses a lariat, and Axel makes him pay with a Harlem Sidekick that sends Tony rolling to the outside. Black takes a swipe at a fan's Zack Malibu/Some Guy poster as he checks on his partner, helping him up to his feet. In the background, Axel is seen climbing to the top. TOP ROPE CLOTHESLINE takes out Black T! Axel dives on top of Tony, hammering him with right hands. When Dan tries pulling him off, Axel decks "The Ice Heart" with an uppercut. Axel returns Tony's gift from earlier, sending Brannigan face-first into the ring apron. Tony sent back into the ring. Axel grabs the second rope with both hands and pulls himself up -- but Dan Black nails him in the lower back with the POWER TRIP KICK (Superkick)! The Champion falls hard from the apron to the arena floor. Tony, lying on the mat, keeps Hebner distracted as Dan throws Axel into the RING STEPS. Not even the loud thud from Axel's body smacking steel grabs Earl's attention. Black picks Axel up and delivers a series of headbutts to the lower back before sending Axel back into the ring, arrogantly dusting his shoulders afterwards. Tony immediately begins targeting Axel's now injured back with a succession of elbow drops. Brannigan scoopes Axel up from behind and plants him near the ropes with a back suplex. He leaps to the middle rope and drops the knee into the spine of the back. Brannigan grinds the knee into the back, tugging on Axel's neck. Even going as far as sticking his fingers into the champion's mouth and pulling back. Axel reaches the ropes. "One, two, three, four, fi-- break it," Hebner demands. Tony shoves Axel's forward, his upper body falling onto the middle rope. As Tony is escorted away, Dan Black jumps on the apron and CHOKES Axel on the middle rope, shaking viciously. He steps back down and wallops Axel with a sickening back-hand slap. The sweat sent flying from Axel's hair. By the time Earl turns around, Dan has already fled the scene of the crime and is adjusting his tie on the other side of the ring, smirking. VENTURA It oughta be a crime to look that good. COLE I thought you two still had some heat from the past. VENTURA Bygones are bygones, Cole. Besides, beautiful people shouldn't hate beautiful people. Axel brings himself to his knees. Tony Brannigan comes over and grabs Axel's head, raking his boot laces into the eyes of the champion of the world. Axel swings wildly while rubbing his eyes, feeling the burn. Axel mistakes Earl Hebner for Tony, taking Earl down with a double-leg takedown. Earl frantically pats Axel on the shoulders to let him know he isn't Tony. Still blinded, Axel closes his fists and tells Brannigan to bring it. He does. Absolutely clobbering him with a stiff kick between the eyes. The cover. ONE... TWO... TH-- NO! Brannigan brings the Champion back to his feet and rams him into the top turnbuckle. With Axel trapped in the corner, Tony drives the shoulder, then the forearm into the lower back. Brannigan pulls Axel out of the corner and suplexes him. Which gets a count of two. Tony grabs a chunk of Axel's hair and picks him up. But out of nowhere, Axel frees himself from Tony and hits a GERMAN SUPLEX out of nowhere! He tries to bridge it, but can't due to his lower back injury. Axel rolls onto his side, avoiding to have to situp, and the crowd goes crazy as the Heavyweight Champion catches a charging Brannigan with a POWESLAM! ONE... TWO... TH-- NO, KICKOUT! Axel hammers Brannigan with a combination of rights, lefts, and uppercuts. Brannigan is sent reeling to the ropes. Axel grabs Tony's bare left hand and whips him across the ring. SPINE-- NO, Axel's back gives out and Tony lands on top of him a la Thesz Press. ONE... TWO... THRE-- NO, KICKOUT! The hurting OAOAST Champion whipped to the corner, staggering out and into the clutches of the confident challenger. Brannigan with a round of backbreakers, continuing to punish the champion's back, no doubt for his Out-of-Body Experience spinebuster. Brannigan completes his series of backbreakers by holding Axel down on his knee and tilting the champion's head back. Earl Hebner gets into position and sees if Axel might want to consider giving up. COLE Dan Black screaming for Axel to quit. I gotta tell you, Jess, Tony Brannigan has been very impressive throughout this bout. He started strong and has managed to cut Axel off at the knees whenever it appears he's beginning to rally. VENTURA It's all chalked up to experience, Michael Cole. Axel only has a few title defenses under his belt, whereas Brannigan has numerous title defenses in the States and overseas. Too far away from the ropes, Axel begins hammering Brannigan with punches until he frees himself from the hold, but Tony shows a great deal toughness by not letting go. Axel pops the crowd when he becomes free by THUMBING Tony in the eye. Dan Black's popping himself. Popping mad. Pacing, pounding the apron with his hands. VENTURA There...There's your World Heavyweight Champion right there. Resorting to cheap tatics because he ain't got what it takes to out wrestling Tony Brannigan. COLE Like Dan and Tony haven't broken a few rules already tonight. I don't see why you're complaining. You want Earl to call for a DQ? The title does-- VENTURA I know the rules. Hebner oughta give Axel a warning. But I'm not surprised one bit. Hebner loves screwing heros. Tony walks right into a SPINEBUSTER! Well, more like a double-leg takedown slam. The cover! ONE... TWO... THRE-- NO, KICKOUT! COLE I think it would of been all over if Axel was healthy. He didn't get the lift he normally does for his spinebuster. VENTURA I see you're already breaking out the excuses. COLE I am not. I'm simply calling it as I see it. VENTURA And now you're rippin' off my quotes. COLE Tony Brannigan calls for a time-out from his knees. He should know better. There are no time outs in wrestling. Kick to the sternum bends Tony backwards. Axel whips Brannigan to the corner and charges after him, rocking Tony with a clothesline. Exact same spot in the opposite corner. Axel hits the ropes as Tony stumbles out of the corner -- but Dan grabs his leg. Axel pulls Black up on the apron and punches him. Down goes Black. Tony spins Axel around and has his right hand blocked. Inverted atomic drop. Brannigan scuttles around the ring in pain. Axel takes a deep breath and hoists Tony up onto his shoulders for the Axel Slam. Black jumps up on the apron and tries to distract the referee. But Hebner has had enough. He ejects Black, ordering him to go backstage. Black starts going crazy on the apron as Earl continues to tell him to leave. With his attention diverted, CWM jumps out over the barricade and slides into the ring. POLLYCUTTER ON AXEL! The fans gasp as CWM slides out of the ring and hops over the barricade again. Even Black looks shocked. With his eyes wide open, he slowly moves down to the floor, shaking his head slowly. Tony gets up dizzily and sees a prone Axel laying on the mat. He spots CWM running out through the crowd and knows exactly what's going on. He looks out to the fans for a second, then to Black who shrugs his shoulders with a frown on his face. It's almost like Tony doesn't know what to do. Finally, he picks Axel up off the mat and spikes him into the mat with the OUT-OF-BODY EXPERIENCE! The fans gasp as the referee goes to make the count. ONE... TWO... THREE! * DING DING DING DING * VENTURA (laughing) He did it! A new Heavyweight Champion of the World. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match and NEW OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion... TONY BRANNIGAN! The crowd roars in shock. Dan Black comes into the ring to celebrate with Tony. Both look a little reluctant, but they're happy nonetheless. Tony is particularly pleased, looking the happiest he has ever been with the title in his grasp. Even a good portion of the fans are cheering. From the crowd, CWM raises his arms up and claps. Meanwhile, DREK STONE, SCOTTY STATIC AND JOHNNY JAX step out onto the top of the ramp. With their arms crossed over their chest, they shake their heads disapprovingly. Tony and Black freeze as they spot these Upstarts staring at them. Axel picks his head up off the mat slowly, sees the three men standing up there, and realizes just what happened. He then drops his head back down to the mat, not believing what has just happened. COLE History has been made. We have a new World Heavyweight Champion. Tony Brannigan is now the OAOAST Champion. The OAOAST is officially under Brannigan's Law. Our final shot of the night sees Tony staring at the title, caressing the "World Heavyweight Wrestling Champion" etched on the belt. He laughs hysterically, then kisses his newly won World Title. Fade to black... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 10, 2005 © 2005 OAOAST Inc./HeldDown Entertainment CREDITS King Cucaracha Nice Guy Adam Hoff NYU Pheonix Fury Legdrop Canadian Chick (?) Tony149 Zack Malibu EL DANDY~! The #1 MST3K Mark Masked Man Of Mystery Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
