Lei Tong

Most team sports outside of rugby.

Robbed? I think most people would agree that the first round could have went either way, especially an early Belfort flurry ended up with him getting momentarily dropped and Tito ending the round with some decent G&P. EDIT: And why would it lead to a rematch, when Belfort has stated he wants to stay at 185?

IT'S DRUNKEN BOUNCER STORY TIME! IT'S DRUNKEN BOUNCER STORY TIME! WHERE YA'AT? WHERE YA'AT? So anyway, my brother, my manager, the club's owner and couple of other bouncers used to work at a local club named Rocks Club back in the day. Now, the place I worked was pretty ghetto itself, but one of the guys' favorite past-times was comparing how ludicrous and insane the times they worked there had been (forewarning: tales regarding Rocks are as told to me by a bunch of drunken co-workers, so make of them what you will). So anyway, the place was a pretty notorious spot for having tons of fights all of the time (it eventually got shot down because of the volume of calls to the police it produced), and thus the security staff eventually came to run much like a gang: guys were hired to security based largely on their ability to fuck someone up, and within 2 weeks of being hired, the other bouncers expected them to be able to prove themselves in what they called "Thunderdome." What TD was was essentially a dirt pit slightly below street level at the back of the club, largely obscured from above by bushes. Anyway, new guys were expected to take a sufficiently deserving and comparably sized troublemaker from the club into Thunderdome and pretty much kick the shit out of them. They apparently told them simply "You better fucking walk back inside before that guy does." Anyone who failed the test was pretty much told to make sure they didn't come back to work, unless they wanted to find themselves all alone the next time a fight broke out. Anyway, the bouncers had a normal routine wherein they would arrive around 9:00, go to the bar, and be DRUNK by 9:30. The favored drink has been described as a "Rocks Club Special": a big red plastic cup filled with 151 and splash or two of Coke to help it go down a little easier (my manager preferred a variation where the Coke is replaced with a bit of Red Bull). A friend of mine made a humorous comparison to the myth that some vikings would down hallucinagens prior to a fight to work up a suitable "berserker rage." But anyway, supposedly this was practically necessaary to make the constant fights and owner's bitching tolerable. By the end of the night, the steady stream of fights would culminate in large groups of guys who would rush the bouncers in the parking lot after closing time, Braveheart style. An example diagram to help: Eses Negros OOO OOO OOOOO OOOOO OOOOO OOOOO Bouncers Anyway, one group would try and rush the bouncers and try and jump them, and which point the bouncers would fight them off to the back of the parking lot. Then, another group would try to get into it with the bouncers as well, and have to beaten back. In worst case scenarios, the two groups would set aside their mutual animosity towards each other, regroup together, and make another rush a tthe club. One such night group fight has since been referred to simply as "The Night 'B' Got Hit By a Car." A bunch of underage, spoiled college kids were the troublemakers that night, with the usual fight occuring at the end of the night. Anyway, the kids were taking a pretty severe ass-whipping (obviously not being as experienced in such fights as the gangbangers that would normally try), and so at one point one of the kids tried to event the odds, stupidly declaring "I'm GETTING MY GUN!!!" as he ran towards his car. Of course, this demanded an immediate response, and so either Big F or Big T (a pair of 6'5, 300+lbs. twin borthers), noticed the kid reach into his car from the passenger side (presumably to try and get a gun out of the glovebox, and so F or T simply slammed their entire body into the car door, crushing the kids shoulder and chest in betweeen the door and car, with a pretty audible scream and *CRUNCH!* sound accompanying it. meanwhile, B had managed to get seperated from the rest of security, becoming overzealous in beating the crap out of one kid in particular. After shoving him aside, he had a split second to realize headlights were approaching him from the left, and "stunned like a fucking deer," didn't have the reflexes to move before some kid hit him from the side with his car, if not especially badly, enough to knock hm for a loop. Another bouncer predictably responded with "B JUST GOT HIT BY A CAR!," at which point the other guys went to check on him as the kids ran to their cars and started peeling out. The lone exception was the would-be gunslinger, who had been taken away in a friend's truck. In retaliation for the whole "running a bouncer over with a car" thing, the bouncers proceeded to destroy the ever loving shit out of the car, breaking the doors off, slashing every tire and piece of upholstery, breaking every piece of glass, and pretty much anything else you can think of aside from smashing the engine or lighting it on fire. To the police they wold of course blame this on the kids, which the police had little reason (or motivation) to disbelieve. Someone later found out at the car actually belonged to some 18 year old girl's mother, who probably wasn;t too happy to find out her girl had been out drinking with a bunch of college idiots who got her car totaled.

If nothing else, Arlovski will go down as one of the biggest wastes of talent in MMA history.

Griffin/Faber'd.

Probably sat on him. Tubby bitch.

"(Barnett) must be wondering 'What will it take to take this guy out?'" More than catch-wrestling.

SLOWEST. AMRBAR. EVER! Seriously, that's how slow I hit* an armbar from mount. *miss

I never found anything particularly weird on anyone (knives were the usual thing), though I once did spot some coke in a women's purse before. Weirdest I heard from any of the other bouncers was a stun gun on one guy and another packing a fucking machete wrapped to his thigh.

Good idea. Quick note: Someone asked me if there was a bouncer's code or general rules we're supposed to follow a while back, and I just remembered one I was told my first night there: Don't tell anyone where you work. After my first night of work, our manager decided to have a staff meeting, seeing as how myself and several other guys were just starting out. He mostly went over a couple of common sense issues, like not taking things personally, always asking other bouncers for help, etc. But before he ended things, he added "By the way, a quick rule of thumb is 'Never let anybody know you work here.' The reason being is that let's say... homeboy here (*points to me*) is out somewhere with his old lady or something, you know, at the movies or whatever. Anyway, some dudes might come up to and be like 'Hey, you work at (the club)?' And you're like "Yeah, so?," and the next thing you know...BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! Next thing we know, you're coming in here next week all busted up, and we're asking 'Man, what happened?' and you're like '(*Eeyore voice*) I got jumped...'" So yeah, even nowadays I'll be going out and people will randomly approach me and ask if I used to work at the club. I've gotten pretty good at straight lying to their faces, though on more than one occasion a drunken friend in tow will interrupt, stating loudly "WHAT'RE YOU TALKING ABOUT, JOE? YOU WORKED THERE FOR YEARS!" Luckily, this has never happened in front of people who might still hold a grudge.

Depends on how drunk I get. I wouldn't want to ruin story for which I wasn't actually there for.

Between Margarito/Mosley, Affliction, a six pack of Stone Arrogant Bastard and a general malcontent fueled by my job search,tonight will probably be another story time. I'm trying to decide between discussing the worse ass-kicking I received as a bouncer, or one of my brother's old stories from when he and some of the other guys used to work at Rocks Club.

I agree. Fedor will be outstruck for the majority of the bout.

I haven't heard anything about Arlovski being particularly bad towards fans before; at worst, I've heard the language barrier makes it harder for him to be as engaging as most fighters. Sylvia, on the other hand, has been described as "okay, but a bit creepy," especially when it comes to females.

Marquardt trying to talk GSP up was slightly awkward, implying that GSP is more skilled than BJ, but describing his main strengths over him being "bigger, stronger, faster..," etc. While true, it implies the fight will be decided by genetics (IMO, it probably will), which is an odd way of giving a training partner props. If anything, he should have at least said GSP has better wrestling.

We all know Blake Bowman was the best character of that season's TUF. Even Matt Hughes loved him.

Awesome... I know everyone is on the "Torres is unbeatable" bandwagon, but Bowles will be his toughest test. The reality is that even with a shorter resume, Bowles should arguably be ranked higher than Torres, as he's defeated a ridiculous ratio of good fighters already, with a number of opponents being comparably better than Torres' best. Bowles is probably the most slept-on fighter in MMA.

Pov's my boy, but I'm getting a sort of "training partner goggles" vibe from him.

Thirded.

Fuck these asinine stats Goldberg keeps blurting out.

My bad on the wrong thread. I'm fucking tired. As soon as this show's over I need to nap before I go out tonight.