Lei Tong

Better HL: Headache Compilation 4 Highlight Notables include... - Willie Peters being a complete cocksucker. - Sergei Bytchkov slamming absolutely everyone in sight. - Gilbert Yvel's flying taint stomp followed by Volk Han's bitch slap.

The thing is, Hansen's wild, open style both standing and on the ground make him vulnerable to good submission guys like Shaolin, or a good technical striker like Sakurai. But he has a number of natural qualities (long reach, slender build, KO power, hard punching from ANY position) and enough skills on the ground to pull out a win against almost anyone at lightweight.

Arai/Pulver was funner, with about a fourth of the flailing about. It also doesn't help that both guys have had much more entertaining and/or technically sound matches over the past year to which this one hardly compared to. MSIA had mentioned that this had the potential to be the ugliest ranking fight in a good while, and it certainly didn't dissapoint in that regard.

Mixed thoughts from MSIA & me, though I've only seen a handful of matches:

SPOILERS response: MMAos. Unranked BJJ stylist who doesn't actually submit anyone worthwhile or even undersized ZST boys... Numba 1?

Dude, just read any preview written by Quadros. He throws out the most asinine shit about a fighter you can possibly think of, and drones on and on about nothing before throwing a half assed prediction out there. He'd save himself a lot of effort by simply saying "I have never seen either guy fight, and nor will I likely ever, as I'll be too busy acting like a know-it-all on the stick in some second rate event or mugging it up at a photo-op with some D-list fighter to bother lending any credence to my undeserved nickname. You'd be better off cutting out the middle man and referencing the Fight Finder." The fact that he's considered the creme de la creme of MMA journalism speaks volumes of how fucking terrible almost the entire field is.

And one more +1 for the road: Gono's got the Engrish skills that kill. "Arry MacBeerru."

James Hirth & Stephen Quardos are neck & neck for "Biggest Dumbfuck in MMA Journalism."

Lemme try and list the UFC title histories from memory: Heavyweight: - Mark Coleman def. Dan Severn via submission @ UFC 12 - Maurice Smith def. Mark Coleman via JD @ UFC 14 - Randy Couture def. Maurice Smith via JD @ UFC Japan I; vacates - Bas Rutten def. Kevin Randleman via JD @ UFC 20; retires, vacates - Kevin Randleman def. Pete Williams via JD @ UFC 23 - Randy Couture def. Kevin Randleman via TKO @ UFC 28 - Josh Barnett def. Randy Couture via TKO @ UFC 36; stripped - Ricco Ridriguez def. Randy Couture via TKO @ UFC 39 - Tim Sylvia def. Ricco Rodriguez via KO @ UFC 41; stripped - Frank Mir def. Tim Sylvia via Technical Submission @ UFC 46; later stripped - Andrei Arlovski def. Tim Sylvia via submission @ UFC 51 for interim title; later made undisputed champion Lightheavyweight: - Frank Shamrock def. Kavin Jackson via submission @ UFC Japan I; later retires, vacates - Tito Ortiz def. Wanderlei Silva via JD @ UFC 25 - Randy Couture def. Chuck Liddell via TKO @ UFC 43; crowned interim champion - Randy Couture def. Tito Ortiz via JD @ UFC 44 - Chuck Liddell def. Randy Couture via KO @ UFC 52 Middleweight: - Dave Menne def. Gil Castillo via JD @ UFC 33 - Murilo Bustamante def. Dave Menne via TKO @ UFC 35; later vacates - Evan Tanner def. David Terrell via TKO @ UFC 51 - Rich Franklin def. Evan Tanner via TKO @ UFC 53 Welterweight: - Pat Miletich def. Mikey Burnett via JD @ UFC Brazil - Carlos Newton def. Pat Miletich via sub @ UFC 31 - Matt Hughes def. Carlos Newton via KO @ UFC 34 - BJ Penn def. Matt Hughes via submission @ UFC 46; stripped - Matt Hughes def. Georges St. Pierre via submission @ UFC 50 Lightweight: - Jens Pulver def. Caol Uno via JD @ UFC 29; later vacates Some info might be wrong, but that's the gist of it.

Marco Ruas has been 40 years old for about 15 years now. Gonzaga out vs. Imes, replaced by Christison. MMAos is in full effect so far this year.

Derrick Noble is Fickett's replacement, which is pretty good for a last minute guy, as he has a decent skillset and has history with Alves, being the first guy to have ever beat him.

Ricco probably wouldn't have tooled Nog as bad as he did, but roided Ricco was still bigger, stronger, and a better wrestler than Nog, and probably would've beat him by a fair margin on points. Oh, and Arai via biggerness.

Mark Coleman has long stated that Minotauro has the most insane grip strength he has ever felt, wrestling, MMA or otherwise. Of course, this also makes Fedor simply pulling his arms away at will within his guard all the more impressive.

Not many people do anymore, though many Judokas jumping into MMA have had to make a number of changes in adapting the art to MMA, including the loss of the jacket and more emphasis on newaza, or groundwork.

- Randy was good early on in his career due to a Greco background that at that point was unheard of in MMA. He was also pretty good at using his semi-well-roundedness to exploit weaknesses in his opponents' games. However, he had a number of flaws, including some mediocre submission defense, pitter-patter G&P and somewhat questionable cardio when above 220-ish. - Tito was roughly in the same boat as Randy, though he made up for the lack of wrestling pedigree with aggression and a better ability to deal damage. He was also one of the first massive lightheavyweights (along with Mezger & Inoue), and knew how to use his size and reach advanatge well. However, even back then it was obvious he didn't like to get hit (often panicking when caught), and it wasn't until after the Shamrock fight that his developed his great cardio. - In his early UFC days, Chuck was more aggressive than he ever was until recently, but seemed to go in lacking a solid gameplan asid from just hitting his opponents and maybe slamming them if the urge hit him. Around the time he fought Monson, he started fighting more like a kickboxer, learning to pick his shots and using his sprawl more. - Hughes was, even back then, the most massively powerful welterweight around. He competed at middleweight a number of times and had managed to overpower most guys there. However, he was pretty raw back then, relying almost completely on his slams and elbows to deal any real damage, and whenever he got put agaisnt someone with a bit of skill, size & toughness (Hallman, Gono, Pele, Kanehara), he struggled. - Severn was basically what everyone thought Randy was upon entering MMA: a footnote in wrestling history with no shoot and bad knees. Seriously, his size and some semblence of wrestling ability and a couple of submissions are what made him a force for a good while. His wrestling was laughably bad at points, and his slappy G&P didn't exactly endear him to many people. It's hard to point out exactly when he became a complete joke. - Frye has always been kind of overrated in my eyes. Yeah, he was a somewhat small, well-rounded guy who beat a number of larger guys... but so did Ruas, who wasn't that good himself. He had a decent 1-2 (automatically making him a better boxer than most guys at the time), knew how wrestle some (automatically making him a betetr wrestler than most guys at the time), and had a litte Judo experience (you get the point). He was one of the first jack-of-all-trade types in MMA, being able to do a little of everything, but none of them too well. He was lucky to face only 3 dangerous opponents in his time, one who had absolutely no heart a the time (Goodridge), one who kicked his ass before tripping over his own uncoordinated fatass (Tank), and one who kicked his ass period (Coleman). Oh, and Tank was a "North American mixed martial artist" before Frye was. BOXING, WRESTLING, & NECK CRANKS, BIATCH!

From my limited experience and exposure to street fighting... 1 guy: punch him in the face, slam him on his head, and then stomp on him a bit. 2 guys or more: run, have a weapon on hand, or a bigger posse on your side.

Kondo's been gun shy as all hell since Silva put the rope-assisted hurt on him, but even if the LONG awaited move to 183lbs. doesn't rejuvinate him, Half-Assed Grappler Yuki still has a great chance at outwrestling and outlasting Baroni to a JD (assuming PRIDE, you know, actually lets him win one).

Once MVA gassed, the fight was basically two old, tired muscular dudes rolling around a bit until one subbed the other after trying for 12 minutes. They probably did you a favor there. Oh, and for no reason at all: Kondo > Frank

*does the Happy Dance.... badly*

Vitor's problem in that fight had more to do with having no real gameplan except "PUNCH! PUNCH! PUNCH!" and having a notoriously questionable gas tank.

- Matyushenko & Vitor were still roughly Top Ten when Tito beat them, and Wanderlei, Kondo, Mezger, Tanner and Silva were all roughly Top 20 when he beat them. Matyushenko, yes (I looked over his record and realized I had forgotten this), but Vitor is an iffy candidate at top ten. You put Silva down twice, and two of the four are more natural 185'ers. - Yes, Kondo & Tanner are both better at 185lbs, but outside of Silva, no one at 205lbs. was able to simply roll through Kondo as Tito did, and despite being chinny as hell, Tanner was still a Top 10 guy at both middlweight and lightheavyweight., so is hardly a slouch. Vitor, like him or not, was widely considered Top 10 until Tito beat him (in what was something of a 10 spot match), and actually came out guns blazing, which many people thought would mean a brutal loss for Tito. - Tito's not a great finisher, but he's not a terrible, Arona/Matsune level one either. Even with his recent mediocre slide, he's still finishes two thirds of his fights, and put Kondo, Tanner & Sinosic away in a combined 5:54. those guys are all very outsized, and naturally 185ers. As for guys who are naturally at 205, Tito is not a finisher unless you are forty-year old pro-wrestler. Eh. Again, Kondo (and Elvis, for that matter) is not easily stopped. I think he has about as much finishing ability and Minotoro, Nakamura or Lambert, and more than Arona. Again, I disagree that Tito is overrated at the moment. He was a former Top 3 level guy who's now struggling to stay relevant in an important match with Forrest.

Please tell me it's Liddell/Horn I. Lie to me, even. WAR TRIO OF SEMI-RARE SUBMISSIONS AGAINST GUYS WITH POOR SUB DEFENSE!!!111

Wrong and correct. Ken is an overrated POS. Tito was overrated for a while, but is now seen for what he is: a solid if unspectacular fighter who has to prove his worth again. - Matyushenko & Vitor were still roughly Top Ten when Tito beat them, and Wanderlei, Kondo, Mezger, Tanner and Silva were all roughly Top 20 when he beat them. - Tito didn't duck Vitor. Vitor injured himself the first time the fight was set up by putting an arm through window, and the next time around Tito had his ACL torn by Phil Baroni in training. -Couture also soundly defeated Chuck & Vitor, immediately before and after, respectively. - Tito's not a great finisher, but he's not a terrible, Arona/Matsune level one either. Even with his recent mediocre slide, he's still finishes two thirds of his fights, and put Kondo, Tanner & Sinosic away in a combined 5:54.

Bisping should murder the other scrubs in his division (and Ken for good measure if he breaks out the boot camp shenanigans), though he could possibly drop a shitty JD to someone.