TheBostonStrangler

I want a match. Against Axis and Chris Raynor and Petro the Clown. NOW.

I will smite the HELL out of you for not knowing my name, n00b. Go back to Englandia, you commie bastard!

Muzz, make sure to write Strangler's name in highly stylized cursive. I want to be the John Hancock of Muzz's Handwritten SWF History

That was a lot of words. Nicely done. I'd have given it a more positive review, though. I thought the Top Model skit was *** or so, and I laughed at the Parnell/Lohan thing at the end. It was **-**1/2 in my opinion. Other than that, solid reivews. I always enjoy reading these, even if I disagree with them, and I look forward to seeing you do these again in the fall. As for the cast, the people who should be kept are: - Fred - Will - Kenan - Seth - Amy People who NEED to be fired/move on: - Rudolph (god, how I loathe her) - Sanz (he's never been funny, and never will be) - Parnell (he's run his course) - Hammond (ditto) - Tina (the writing's getting stale, especially the commercial parodies...might be time for somebody new there) - Dratch (I like her, but I think it's time she moved onto something else And people who I don't really care about either way: - Finesse (he's not bad, but doesn't really add anything) - Riggle (I see nothing in him. He's just another body) - Sudeikis (don't know anything about him. No attachment there) - Anyone else I managed to forget doing the rundown. I miss Richards...I thought he would have been an excellent replacement for Darrell, since impressions seemed to be Jeff's biggest talent. I think losing him was something that's going to hurt SNL. Hopefully SNL can get a guy like Eddie Murphy or Will Ferrell or Phil Hartman who can appear in 4-5 sketches a week and stay funny. I like Seth a lot as a second banana type (somewhere around Lovitz/Carvey territory), Forte is godly at his odd sketches, Armisen is coming into his own, and Poehler is talented when she's not doing that stupid RICK! sketch or Weekend Update. Add an all-star to the group, and SNL would take off. They've got all the role players in place, but they need that one big name to get it going. Here's hoping they get things in place for next year.

Mark Bellhorn. I love the man, even with his mullet and 40% K rate.

I'll donate $5. Least I can do.

Strangler would be a good 1B, in my opinion.

Did you ever call me? I know that TNT called me once, but I don't remember if you did too.

Alice In Chains Pearl Jam Pink Floyd Red Hot Chili Peppers Cream/Eric Clapton White Stripes

I think the coolest way for Rey to get his shot would be to win the Royal Rumble. That'd put him over in a HUGE way. Have him be denied a title shot because of his size, have a couple midcard feuds that he wins, have him still passed over for a shot, put the title on heel Eddie, have Rey Rey win the Royal Rumble to prove to everyone he can hang with the big boys, then beat Eddie Guerrero at Wrestlemania to become champion. It'd make Rey Rey look like a million bucks, and it'd be one of the best WM main events of all-time. It'd be a shocking Royal Rumble win, which would make that event even better. And most importantly, it'd help to erase the stigma of cruiserweight forever. Michaels and Benoit and Jericho started, but if Rey Mysterio became champion, then cruisers wouldn't be nearly as pigeonholed as they are now. And having Mysterio defend the title against Eddie, Angle, Cena, JBL, and others would be awesome.

I remain stout in my indifference to Flesher.

??? BETTER be Edwin MacPhisto genetically combined with Chris Wilson. Otherwise, I will be disappointed.

A 30-minute Ironman match would be good. A 60-minute would not work. But let them go for 30 minutes, keep it somewhat high-energy, and have LOTS of pinfalls. I'd have Angle take a 4-1 lead with three minutes left, then have HBK go on a MASSIVE run at the end to tie it, or come up just short. Lots of pinfalls is a must.

Lazy n00b

Glad we could do something to help. We're always here for you to cheer you up. I'll even start D'Angelo Jimenez in my fantasy league today. GO REDS!

I'm aware. I still feel my equation (which I take quite seriously, thank you) is certainly the way to go.

Well, I think we need to bust out an equation: Base Points = 50 Legend = 10 points Match on card = 5 points Standing O = 29.392 points Winning pop = 12 points "Let's Go ____" chant = 3.29(x) points (where x is equal to the numbers of DDT's in the match) Fact that this is the HOLT report = subtract all points and let WC have his fun Final tallies: ELM: 42 Mak: 42 Wildchild: 42 Well....guess I should have seen that coming.

Ouch, man. I'm sorry to hear it. A couple of my friends lost parents recently, so I've seen how tough it can be. Hang in there, Chris.

Avril Lavigne - Skater Boi Backstreet Boys - Larger Than Life, Everybody, I Want It That Way Britney Spears - Sometimes I Run Meatloaf - Bat Out Of Hell Rednecks - Cotton-Eyed Joe Steve Winwood - Higher Love, The Finer Things Hootie and the Blowfish - I Only Wanna Be With You Third Eye Blind - Semi-Charmed Life (I adore this song) Limp Bizkit - Break Stuff Kriss Kross - Jump Spice Girls - Wannabe Justin Timberlake - Rock Your Body Five for Fighting - Superman Eve 6 - Inside Out Culture Club - Karma Chameleon Chris Isaak - Wicked Game Nickelback - Never Again Disturbed - Stupify Maroon 5 - This Love Huey Lewis and the News - The Power Of Love Hanson - MMMBop And there's more.

Tom, did I mention how much I hate you? REALLY tell you? Because I do, in fact, hate your guts.

OMG BOBBIE WAZ SO GHEY!~!~!~! But I know what you mean, Muzz. I bet most people had a win like that. I almost quit three weeks into my career because I was 1-4, thanks to facing John Kruger 3 times in my first five matches. Then he moves up and I won a five-man match for the IGNJL TV Title. Without that win, I wouldn't have made it through the summer. Instead, I ended up wrestling on and off for 2 1/2 years. It's all about that one win that makes you go, "Hey, you know, maybe I can actually do this".

I'd like to be Defense Secretary, just so I could fuck with all the military people (except for WC, who would immediately be made an Admiral).

WC, I loved that match as well. That 8-man was fucking awesome. In terms of storylines, it's one of the best matches I've ever seen. It provided perfect closure to the epic Wildchild/Ejiro feud, worked on W&D vs. Justice and Rule, had me and Tom on the same side after our feud, furthered TBS vs. Taylor, worked on Flesher's stuff with Ash (I think), and was a kickass match to boot. Awesome stuff that I'm gonna re-read right now.

I don't think I'll bother linking to it, but a personal favorite of mine was a tag match from the summer of 2002 (the June 12, 2002 Storm, to be exact). I had recently rejoined the fed as a member of the then-new Magnificent Seven (which at the time was Wilson, myself, Stryke, TNT, Frost, Danny Williams, and Outcast, IIRC). I was still trying to establish myself as something, and had a random tag team match against Thoth and Spider Nekura, who had just returned. As I recall, Stryke didn't write much of it (if any...I really don't remember), so I just wrote a match and turned it in. Somehow, it won. I was never more proud of a match. I got a triple threat match against Edwin and Spider, which I lost, but it helped to establish me as an upper-midcard type, which I was quite happy about. Right about then, I started feuding with Erek, which was the best thing I ever did in the SWF. Basically, this match elevated me when I really needed it. Good times.

That must have been a proud day for your people when you were granted that bubble on your loan application or whatever. At least you know that people will discriminate against your ethnic group specifically rather than lumping you in with some other bunch of dirty foreigners. Even if that cop tries to take away your right to be denied service and/or rights as a Filipino rather than a Mexican, you can see the tide turning. FIGHT ON, GOOD SIR! FIGHT ON!