alfdogg

Main event is mine. Will be announced on tommorrow's show.

He gave it to him on RAW once, as well. Show kicked out at 1, IIRC.

Apparently he's set to return Saturday.

The good news for the Grizzles is that Gasol is expected to return within the next week, perhaps even tommorrow. But they're already 12 games under .500, and being in the West, I don't think they can overcome that in time to make the playoffs again.

I'd like to see Dwight Howard at least get a mention, but if you play in the Eastern conference and your name's not LeBron or Wade, you won't get one.

KC - 24 San Francisco at Seattle (9.5) (3.5) Dallas at Atlanta Cleveland at Baltimore (11.5) Detroit at Green Bay (5.5) Houston at New England (11.5) (3.5) Jacksonville at Tennessee Miami at Buffalo (1.5) N.Y. Jets at Minnesota (3.5) Philadelphia at N.Y. Giants (5.5) (3.5) Pittsburgh at Carolina Tampa Bay at Chicago (13.5) Washington at New Orleans (9.5) (2.5) Denver at Arizona Kansas City at San Diego (8.5) St. Louis at Oakland (2.5) Cincinnati at Indianapolis (3.5)

ESPN is reporting that Lamar Odom will miss at least a month due to a sprained knee.

The Mole hate is almost as bad as the Patriots hate here.

[i]Jingle Bells[/i] plays over the arena, as OAOAST ring attendants dressed as elves bring out various "presents", followed by a seven-foot high cactus wrapped in barbed wire, little christmas lights covering each barb. An attendant climbs a ladder, also wrapped in similar barbed wire, and places a star on top of the tree. The star is comprised of steel spikes, as you would see on the Road Warriors' shoulder pads. COACH Aah, the holiday season! COLE Absolutely, it's that time of year, time for our Christmas Deathmatch! Alfdogg defending his Canadian title against the hometown boy, Thunderkid! Let's go to Michael Buffer! *DING DING DING* (done all slow and dramatic-like) BUFFER [i]LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLadies and gentlemen, the following is a match for the OAOAST Canadian championship! Tonight, two former associates will go to war, perhaps their final war, right here in GREEN BAY, WISCONSIN![/i] *crowd cheers* BUFFER [i]Right here, for the first time in wrestling history, the OAOAST presents, on network television, a CHRISTMAS DEATHMATCH! ARE YOU READY?[/i] *crowd cheers* BUFFER [i]Green Bay, Wisconsin, ARRRRRRRRRRRRE YYYYYYYYYYOU RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREADY???[/i] *crowd cheers louder* BUFFER [i]Then for the thousands in attendance here tonight, and the millions watching around the world...there's only one thing left to say. Ladies and gentleman...LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLET'S GET RRRRRRRRRREADY TO RRRRRUMBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!![/i] *crowd cheers, then [i]God of Thunder[/i] hits, and they EXPLODE, as TK walks through the curtains.* BUFFER [i]Coming down the aisle...he weighs in at 250 pounds, and hails from right here in GREEN BAY, WISCONSIN...[/i] *crowd cheers* BUFFER [i]...introducing the challenger...THUNDERKID![/i] TK slides into the ring and poses on the buckles in every corner. He then stands mid-ring with his hands on his knees, as [i]Magnum Opus[/i] hits, and the crowd showers Alf with boos on his way out. BUFFER [i]His opponent...weighing in at 240 pounds, he is the REIGNING and DEFENDING OAOAST Canadian champion...ALFDOGG!!!!![/i] Alf slides into the ring and poses on the buckles with his belt, drawing boos. He then hands the belt to the referee, who raises it in the air, then calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* Alf and TK face off in mid-ring, talking trash to one another as camera bulbs go off around them. Suddenly, Alf strikes! COLE Here we go! Alf gets in a few shots, then he and TK start trading punches! TK gets the better of the exchange, backing Alf into a corner, and climbing to the second rope, then hammering away as the crowd counts along! 1!!! 2!!! 3!!! 4!!! 5!!! 6!!! Alf brings TK out of the corner and tries an inverted atomic drop, but TK avoids the impact, then floors Alf with a clothesline! TK's home crowd cheers him on! COLE And TK on a roll here in this championship match! Alf ducks out of the ring, but TK meets him with a PLANCHA~! TK delivers right hands on the floor, then drags him over and rams his face into the ring steps! COLE And Alf's face meets the steel steps! COACH And it's been all TK here early on, Alf better get it going! TK sets up Alf, but Alf reverses an Irish whip, and sends TK into another set of ring steps! COACH There we go! Alf sets up TK on the floor, and delivers a vertical suplex! He then reaches underneath the ring. COACH What could Alf be going after here, Cole? COLE Who knows. Alf comes out with a strand of Christmas lights, and wraps them around TK's throat! COLE And Alf trying to choke out TK with those Christmas lights! COACH Like I said, I love the holiday season! Alf then throws TK back into the ring, and grabs a long, skinny present. He smacks it lightly against the ropes, then brings it down with a CRACK across the back of TK! COLE And Alf making good use of the "presents" already here, Coach! Alf unwraps the present, which was obviously a kendo stick, and delivers two more shots to the back, then lets TK get to his feet. Alf then delivers a shot to the gut, and another one to the back! Alf then raises his arms in the air, which draws boos from the crowd. Alf covers... 1... 2... Kickout! Alf picks up TK and sends him into the corner, then charges with the stick, but TK lifts a foot into the face! TK then grabs the stick from Alf, and sends him to the mat with a shot right between the eyes! COLE WOW, right in the face! TK then sets up the cactus in the corner, then sets up Alf for a slingshot! COACH Oh, no! TK sends Alf right into the cactus with a slingshot! He then pulls Alf off of the cactus and delivers a back suplex, before going to the outside and grabbing the ladder which was used to put the star atop the cactus. COLE And TK with that ladder now! TK pulls the cactus out of the corner, then sets the ladder there, and starts climbing. When he gets to the top, he reaches his right foot out and places it on the cactus, then rides it down like a surfboard on top of Alf! COLE And Alf tastes the cactus again! TK covers... 1... 2... Kickout! TK then slides to the outside and sets up a table on the floor. He then slides in and picks Alf up, setting him up in a powerbomb! TK lifts him, and drives him into the mat! He then lifts him up once more, and carries him towards the ropes! COACH Oh no, not through the table! However, Alf is able to block, and counter into a hurricanrana, taking TK right over the top and down through the table! COLE But it's Alf with a terrific counter, and TK on the floor after going through that table! Alf lays on the apron for a few seconds, then grabs TK and drags him down the entranceway. COLE And now Alf taking TK backstage! Alf gets through the curtains, and rams TK gut-first into a table! He then spots Jumbo backstage, who is dressed as Santa. The crowd laughs. COACH What the hell is he doing back there? Alf grabs a large sack of candy canes from Jumbo. JUMBO Hey, I was eatin' those! Alf walks over to TK with the sack, and slams it across his back! Alf then finds a steel chair, and measures TK. When TK turns around, still on his knees, Alf brings the chair down onto his head...but it comes back up and cracks Alf! The camera then zooms in on TK, who is wearing a cheese head! This gets a big pop from the crowd. COLE How about that counter? TK picks up Alf and drags him across the backstage area, throwing him through a door, which leads outside! TK follows and he and Alf battle it out in the cold, Wisconsin air! COACH Can you imagine how cold those two must be right now? COLE This has been a non-stop fight for the Canadian title here on HeldDOWN~! TK gets the better of the brief outdoor slugfest, then drags Alf back inside, and all the way back down to the ring. COLE And back out in the ring, where Alf is now busted open, probably from that chair to the face! TK tosses Alf back into the ring, and grabs another present, this one round-shaped! COACH Look at that! TK got the world's largest donut for Christmas! TK unwraps the present, to reveal a wreath made entirely of barbed wire! COACH (concerned) ...well, I was wrong! COLE If you are right, I don't think Alf's gonna like the taste of this one! TK rolls back into the ring, where Alf has now found a present, unwrapping it to reveal a STOP sign! Alf pulls himself to his feet as TK stalks him, and tosses the sign at him, distracting him long enough to deliver a SUPERKICK~!, which sends the wreath back into the face of TK! COACH Oh my goodness! COLE And now it's TK who's been lacerated! Alf slowly gets to his feet, and tips the cactus over onto TK! COLE And what's Alf going for now? Alf grabs the stop sign, and ascends the top rope. COACH This can't end good for TK! Alf leaps off the top, and SPLASHES THE CACTUS, with TK underneath! COLE TK SMASHED underneath the cactus! Cover... 1... 2... NO! TK gets a shoulder up! COLE But still hanging in there! Alf grabs yet another present, which contains a baseball bat bag. Alf pulls out a bat, which just happens to be wrapped in barbed wire! COLE And the hits just keep on coming! COACH Well, this is where the Brewers play, so, maybe not. Alf waits for TK to pull himself up, then charges, but takes the wreath to the midsection! TK then backs into the ropes, slides on the mat, and decks Alf in the face with the wreath! COLE And Alf takes a shot with that wreath right to the face! TK staggers around the ring briefly, then drops to his knees and digs the wreath into the face of Alf! COLE And now TK just further opening that wound on the forehead of Alf! TK releases, and Alf immediately scrambles out of the ring. TK follows, as Alf makes his way backstage once again. The camera follows TK, getting lost in the curtain, then when the view is restored, the view is Ken Pantera hammering away on TK! COLE Oh, come on! What's Pantera doing there? Pantera then holds TK in a front facelock, as Felix Strutter appears, holding a massive candy cane, breaking it across the back of TK! COLE And TK reeling after that sneak attack by Team Canada! Alf sits in Santa's chair nearby, catching his wind, then gets to his feet and drags TK over to a large tank, about 10 feet high off the ground, containing Christmas tree balls. Alf climbs the ladder on the side of the tank, dragging TK up behind him. COACH Oh no, I shudder to think what could happen here! Once he has TK all the way up on the platform, about 6 feet above the tank, the two begin to trade blows. TK starts to get the better of the exchange, but Alf ducks a big right hand, and lifts TK in a back suplex, with both men FALLING INTO THE TANK OF CHRISTMAS TREE BALLS~! COLE OH MY GOD, both men into the tank! Crowd: HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT! Both men lay around in the tank for about 30 seconds, before Alf starts to stir a little bit. He climbs out of the tank, and removes his shirt, shaking all the debris off of it, before putting it back on. He then grabs TK and pulls him down to the floor as he is inching his way down the ladder, and rams his face into the side of the tank. Pantera backs a golf cart onto the scene, and Alf drapes TK over the seat, then sits on the back, as Pantera drives them to the ring. COLE And now Alf and TK back on their way to the ring, courtesy of Ken Pantera! Alf grabs TK off the cart and rolls him back into the ring, then high-fives Pantera before he drives off. Alf then rolls back into the ring himself. Alf sets up the ladder in front of TK, then places TK's arms over his chest, much like the Undertaker would do. He places the wreath on his chest, and starts climbing the ladder. COACH And now Alf will finish TK off! Alf gets to the top of the ladder, gets his balance, and DROPS A LEG on TK! COACH That's it! Cover... 1... 2... NO!!! TK gets a shoulder up! COLE BUT NO! TK refusing to quit! Alf lays back on the mat, as the crowd starts to cheer, and encourage TK. COLE Outstanding fight between both competitors! COACH You almost hate to see a loser in a match like this, Cole! Alf picks up TK and lays him against the cactus, in the corner. Alf backs up, and raises his hand in the air, drawing boos from the crowd, then charges TK, but TK moves out of the way, and Alf delivers a splash to the cactus! COLE And Alf once again into the cactus! TK grabs the ladder, and dropkicks it into the back of Alf! TK then catches Alf, hooking him in a front facelock! He then lifts Alf into the air, and drives him with the THUNDERBOLT DDT~!!!!!11111 COLE HE HIT IT! 1... 2... NO!!! Alf gets a shoulder up! COACH How do you like that, Cole? Now it's Alf hanging in by the skin of his teeth! TK gets to his feet and looks down on Alf, rubbing his hand through his hair. He then sets the ladder back up, and climbs it, with his back to the cactus, bringing Alf up on the other side. TK sets up a suplex, but Alf blocks, and delivers right hands, then rams TK's face into the top of the ladder. Alf then climbs over to the other side of the ladder, sitting on TK's upper back and hooking his legs under TK's arms. COLE Oh my God... Alf flips down, BRINGING TK DOWN ON THE CACTUS~! COACH DAY-UM~! COLE And TK landing high and tight on his head and shoulders! Alf turns TK over on his back, then signals for the end. COACH NOW it's over! Alf scales the top rope, while TK reaches over, and grabs the spike star from the cactus! COLE But look at TK! Alf gets his balance, and leaps off for the FIVE-STAR ALF SPLASH~!!!!!11111 ...but TK catches Alf in the forehead with the spike! COACH OH NO! COLE Alf diving right into that spike! Alf rolls over onto his back, as TK slowly gets to his feet. TK then backs into the ropes, and jumps, driving the spike star into Alf's forehead one more time, then picks up Alf again, as the crowd gets to their feet again...and delivers the THUNDERBOLT DDT~!!!!!11111 COLE He got it again! Cover... 1... 2... 3!!! *DING DING DING* The crowd EXPLODES as TK rolls to his back. COLE HE GOT HIM! And we've got a NEW champion! BUFFER [i]The winner of the match...and NEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW OAOAST Canadian champion...THUNDERKID!!!!![/i] COLE Two former friends turned enemies putting their bodies, their careers, their [i]lives[/i] on the line here tonight for the gold, and in the end, Thunderkid has done it, he is the NEW OAOAST Canadian champion! The crowd is still going wild, as TK receives the belt from the referee, and raises it before slumping forward in the corner and hugging it to the side of his face. As Alf is helped from the ring, TK slowly rolls out and slaps hands with the ringside fans, then climbing over the barrier and celebrating with his hometown people. COLE An incredible scene here for Thunderkid, will it be the same scene later for the OAOAST when Zack Malibu clashes with Bruce Blank? It's Bruce's contract vs Zack's respect, coming up soon!

Guess I should have struck while the iron was hot when I wanted to Classic this thread.

No.

Ric Bucher says the current favorites to get Iverson are Sacramento, Denver, and Golden State.

Apparently Iverson was almost sent to Charlotte, but he didn't want to go there, so it was nixed.

The Nets normally start the season slowly, prompting lots of "the Nets are finished" talk. They then have a strong finish, prompting lots of "the Nets could come in the backdoor to win the championship" talk, only to flame out in the playoffs. That's pretty much been the status quo for the Nets under Lawrence Frank.

Outside of the Atlantic division, only Portland, Memphis, and Charlotte have worse records than the Nets, who lead the Atlantic at 8-12.

Here's some Iverson stuff, from the Philadelphia Inquirer "Bulls: Chicago could send the expiring contracts of forwards P.J. Brown and Michael Sweetney, with guard Ben Gordon and a first-round pick to Philly for Iverson. Their brass will meet today but appear unlikely to make such a move." "Dallas: The Mavs could send the expiring contracts of Jerry Stackhouse and Austin Croshere, along with point guard Devin Harris. Problem? Owner Mark Cuban loves Harris and doesn't want any debate as to whether it will be Dirk Nowitzki's team." "Boston: Coach Doc Rivers is willing to surrender anyone other than Paul Pierce for Iverson." "Golden State: Mike Dunleavy Jr., Troy Murphy or Jason Richardson would have to come to Philly to make a deal happen, but the Sixers would love to get their hands on Monta Ellis. The Warriors say they're not about to part with Ellis, but everyone talks that nonsense before a deal gets done." "Timberwolves: They barely have anyone the Sixers want, outside of Villanova product Randy Foye. Minnesota swears it's not about to let him go. We'll see." "Clippers: The Sixers shouldn't even talk to them unless they're willing to part with Corey Maggette and Shaun Livingston, which they are not willing to do." "Grizzlies: Eddie Jones' expiring contract is about the only asset the Grizzlies have to offer. Mike Fratello's toupee will fall off trying to coach Iverson." "Kings: Mike Bibby is owed $28 million over the final two years of his contract, but rumors have swirled he could opt out. Plus, Ron Artest loves Iverson." SA Express-News "Spurs coach Gregg Popovich knows one team that won't be pursuing Philadelphia guard Allen Iverson. His own. Asked if it was safe to eliminate the Spurs from the Iverson sweepstakes, Popovich paused for effect, pulled on his chin, looked at the ceiling as if in deep thought, then said, "Yes." "The Lakers aren't expected to be in the mix for Iverson, but coach Phil Jackson isn't ready to completely rule them out of the trade talks. "The owner of the Lakers (Jerry Buss) has always felt that All-Star talent is something he can accommodate, and is willing to accommodate," Jackson said. "So I wouldn't just outright say we have no interest." LA Daily News "However remote the chances of trading for Allen Iverson might be, however little it makes sense to play Iverson in the same backcourt with Kobe Bryant, Lakers coach Phil Jackson refused to rule out the possibility Sunday. "I would not say no about that," Jackson said. "The owner (Jerry Buss) that's been here with the Lakers has always been a person that has looked at All-Star talent as something that he can accommodate and that he's willing to accommodate. "So I wouldn't just outright say we have no interest." "The Lakers are not believed to have interest in trading for Iverson, which made Jackson's pregame answer a surprise."

Current discussion on ESPNNEWS: The Colts' run defense is exploitable. WOW. That's GENIUS ANALYSIS from Sean Salisbury, folks.

The Pacers were hit with the dreaded food poisoning bug last night. In addition to Jackson's suspension and O'Neal's injury, Harrington and Daniels had to sit out because of this, and Tinsley is playing through it. The Bulls have only gone 7 deep, and every one of them has scored in double figures. Currently 86-75 Bulls near the end of the third.

I don't think they look alike at all.

New rankings from ESPN 1. Phoenix 2. San Antonio 3. Dallas 4. Utah 5. LA Lakers 6. Detroit 7. Houston 8. Orlando 9. Minnesota 10. Chicago 11. LA Clippers 12. Cleveland 13. Denver 14. Golden State 15. Indiana 16. Miami 17. Washington 18. Seattle 19. Sacramento 20. NO/OK 21. Milwaukee 22. Portland 23. Atlanta 24. Memphis 25. New Jersey 26. Toronto 27. New York 28. Boston 29. Charlotte 30. Philadelphia Roy called it! I do like that they were referred to as "Eddy Curry's Knicks" in the comment space.

I'll have mine later. I'm tired.

BTW, I talked with Zack, and told him you guys could go ahead and have the ME.

I want to say it was Sandy, but I don't think he's ever had sex. this shouldn't go unnoticed

Us druggies should live for 100% personal warning!