alfdogg

COLE Well folks, we're ready for our first matchup here in the American Bracket of the Tag Team World Cup! COACH That's right, we get a look at the team who was chosen to represent this bracket at the expense of Team Heyross, and I'm expecting a great showing from the Canadians! COLE The eighth-seeded team from Antarctica is their opposition, and they're already in the ring, let's go up to Michael Buffer! BUFFER [i]The following is a first-round matchup in the Tag Team World Cup tournament! It is scheduled for one fall, with a 15-minute time limit! Introducing the first team, representing Antarctica, at a combined weight of 494 pounds...introducing first, from McMurdo Station, Antarctica...SHERMAN NELSON![/i] *Crowd applauds respectfully as Nelson waves. Nelson is around 6-3, and very fit.* [i]And his partner, from Macquarie Island...ROSS LIVINGSTON![/i] *Similar reaction. Livingston looks much similar to Nelson, but is a couple inches taller.* COLE Well, these guys look to be in excellent shape, Coach! COACH Not only that, they must have some great tanning salons down there! [i]Tom Sawyer[/i] by Rush hits as a small, lightweight black man in parachute pants and a very muscular, bleach blonde man wearing a singlet emerge from the curtains. They receive a mixed reaction from the crowd as they slap hands with those who are willing. BUFFER [i]Their opponents, representing Canada...at a combined weight of 485 pounds...first, hailing from Thunder Bay, Ontario...FELIX STRUTTER! His partner, hailing from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan...KEN PANTERA![/i] The Canadians pose on the buckles, drawing another mixed reaction. They then jump down and meet the Antarcticans mid-ring. The referee explains the rules to them, and the teams exchange handshakes before the referee calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* COACH Well, here we go! This is the team that the committee felt was better fit to lead our bracket than Team Heyross! Let's see what they've got! Strutter starts the match off with Nelson. Strutter circles the ring, and ties up, then takes Nelson down with a drop toehold! Strutter quickly spins around and grabs a side headlock, but Nelson rises up and pushes Strutter off into the ropes, then takes him down with a shouldercheck! Nelson goes to the ropes, and Strutter rolls to his stomach, allowing Nelson to hop over. As Nelson comes back, Strutter stands up on his hands and hooks his ankles around Nelson's head! Nelson pulls Strutter up into a powerbomb position. COACH See that? In trouble already. Team Heyross wouldn't have gotten into this mess! Strutter fires off a couple of right hands, then flips backwards and lands on his feet off the mat. Nelson immediately goes for a clothesline, but Strutter quickly ducks and goes to the ropes. COLE Cat-like quickness from Felix Strutter! Strutter ducks another clothesline, then leapfrogs Nelson. Strutter then stops as Nelson tries to attempt a leapfrog, then does a jumping spinning wheel kick in front of him, coming down on his feet and drawing oohs from the crowd, before quickly jumping again and nailing Nelson right in the sternum with a dropkick! Nelson goes down and rolls to the outside, as Strutter starts to follow but instead stops at the ropes. COACH I gotta say, impressive stuff from Strutter right there! Nelson takes a five-count on the outside, then slides back in. He confers with Livingston on the outside, before approaching Strutter again. This time, he ducks under and delivers a knee to the gut, then whips him into the ropes and catches him with a clothesline. He picks him up and executes a great vertical suplex, before tagging in Livingston. COLE And our first tag of the match, and Ross Livingston in there now! COACH Where the hell is Macquarie Island, anyway? COLE Macquarie Island is about halfway between Antarctica and the island of Tasmania. Livingston delivers a big slam on Strutter. COACH ...you have WAY too much time on your hands if you just knew that offhand. Livingston picks up Strutter on his shoulders, then spins him around and delivers a side slam! COLE Wow, great power move right there! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE First cover of the match gets two for the Antarcticans! Livingston measures, and comes in with an elbowdrop, but Strutter rolls out of the way! VENTURA Ooh, he telegraphed that move! COLE Hey, who's calling this match? VENTURA ... Strutter tags in Pantera, and Livingston stands up and looks him up and down. Livingston and Pantera tie up, and Pantera backs Livingston into a corner. Pantera breaks cleanly, and Livingston comes out, and ties up once again. This time, he grabs a side headlock on Pantera, but Pantera lifts him and delivers a back suplex! COACH Wow, what strength! Nelson jumps into the ring, and Pantera meets him by pressing him HIGH into the air over his head! COLE Great power being put on display here by Ken Pantera! Pantera waits for Livingston to get up, then presses Nelson on top of him! Both Antarcticans roll out of the ring, and Strutter climbs to the top and turns his back to them, then nails them with a CORKSCREW PRESS~! COACH WHOA! COLE SENSATIONAL move by Felix Strutter! Strutter tosses Nelson back into the ring, then climbs back onto the apron where he is tagged in by Pantera. Pantera hooks Nelson in a FULL NELSON~! COACH Oh, the irony! Pantera spins Nelson around three times, then turns it into a URINAGE~! Meanwhile, Strutter is climbing the turnbuckles...and coming off of them with a SHOOTING STAR LEGDROP~! Strutter quickly covers... 1... 2... 3!!! *DING DING DING* COLE And it's over, just like that! COACH I'm impressed! BUFFER [i]The winners of the match, advancing to the next round...TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAMMMMMMM CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA![/i] COACH Well, I'll say this...Canada really showed me something tonight, but they had a little trouble at the beginning of this match, that I don't think would have happened had Team Heyross been involved! And this was the lowest seed! I've got a feeling they're in for a long tournament, Cole! COLE So, the Canadians advance to the next round, where they'll take on the winner of the match between Cuba and Ireland. We'll have a full update later, as well as highlights of Team Heyross's match over in India, where they were victorious over the team from Hong Kong! COACH Hey, I wonder if they got to meet Dhalsim? COLE ...let's go to Josh.

The show will take place in Cleveland, OH.

From looking at his numbers, that's about the extent of his appeal. Only 39% shooting in his two seasons, but did improve his 3-point and FT percentages. In other news, the Wizards will sign Darius Songalia at 5 yrs/$23 million. That's not too bad yearly (not even the full MLE), but I'm not sure about the five-year part.

The Bulls have agreed on a deal with Adrian Griffin. Once the Chandler deal is finalized, the Bulls will trade J.R. Smith to the Nuggets for Howard Eisley and two second-round picks. They will then waive Eisley to sign Griffin.

This is the team I'd take. I've got 13 here, I can't decide which guy to drop off. So I'm just going to list them all. Gilbert Arenas - Great scorer & shooter, can handle the ball if need be. Shane Battier - Perimeter defense, shooting, very coachable. Elton Brand - Dominates the paint in every aspect, has a bit of a mid-range game. Kobe Bryant - Great scorer, good enough defender, great competitor. Kirk Hinrich - A *real* PG, not the "score a lot of points with some assists sprinkled in" kind we've become accustomed to. Dwight Howard - Excellent rebounding & post defense, very coachable. LeBron James - Will pretty much do anything needed at four different positions, at least offensively. Shawn Marion - Mostly for defense, both inside and out, but is a good slasher and decent shooter. Brad Miller - Banger who's a great passer and has a nice touch from the post position. Chris Paul - Pretty much the same as Hinrich, except a much better defender. Michael Redd - Shooting, shooting, shooting. A big problem in '04, a team I thought Redd should have been on. Amare Stoudemire - Presuming his injuries don't linger, obviously. Has still yet to reach 100% according to some reports. But he's just unstoppable inside. Dwyane Wade - Same as LeBron, but won't play as many positions. Slightly better defender, but less passing ability.

Alf promo, plus a World Cup tag match. Maybe two if I feel like it.

Kirk Hinrich and Greg Oden were added recently, as well.

"Those are more doctored than Nixon's Watergate tapes!"

The Pistons will sign Flip Murray to a two-year deal, according to ESPN.

Possibly. Apparently there's interest in Jamal Magloire, as well.

Oh shit. The Pacers also got a $7.5 million trade exception. That's huge.

The Pacers got the rights to Andrew Betts, a 1998 draftee who has never played in the league. So yeah, the Hornets basically gave up no one.

I'm working on it right now.

My stuff will be late.

Spurs sign Jacque Vaughn, and give offer sheets to Jackie Butler and Francisco Elson. I think Butler's better than either Rasho or Mohammed, but Isiah will probably match that one. Elson was good in short spurts when Camby was out, but I don't know about him as a full-time starter.

Actually, Carmelo signed the max deal he was originally offered, but with an ETO after the fourth year. Chris Bosh also signed a LeBron deal. Greg Buckner agreed to a three-year deal with Dallas today.

TONY SCHIAVONE Well, we promised at Battlebowl we'd have further news concerning the Tag Team World Cup tournament, and here it is! The tournament will begin next week, as a matter of fact, we've been able to secure at least one match right here on HeldDOWN~! next week. Here is the American Bracket: [img=http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v197/alfdogg/TTWCAmericanBracket.jpg] As you can see, the #1 seed in the American Bracket will be the team representing Canada, they'll be taking on the 8th-seeded team from Antarctica, in a match that will take place right here on HeldDOWN~! a week from tonight! JESSE VENTURA Now we should point out that when we say "American bracket", that represents North AND South America, and not just these United States! TONY That's exactly right, and the winner of that match will take on the winner of the 4-5 matchup where the fourth-seeded Cuban team will take on the team from Ireland, who received the fifth seed in the American Bracket. Our third seed in the American Bracket is the team representing Germany, and they'll be taking on the sixth-seeded Poland team. And our final matchup features the #2-seeded Mexicans taking on the #7 seed, Switzerland! You got a favorite in this bracket? JESSE Well, I'm not too acquainted with these teams, Tony Schiavone, but I'm going to take the safe bet and go with the Canadians! If they were seeded ahead of Team Heyross, they must be something, I'm very anxious to see what they've got next week! TONY Yes, of course Team Heyross will compete in the Asian Bracket, we'll get to that in a little bit! The finals of the American bracket will eminate from New York's Shea Stadium on Saturday, August 5th! And now, a look at the European Bracket: [img=http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v197/alfdogg/TTWCEuropeanBracket.jpg] As you can see, it's the U.K. drawing the #1 seed, and a showdown with the eighth-seeded Portugese team! From there, the winner faces either the French team, which drew the fourth seed, or the fifth-seeded team representing Argentina! Sweden will be the #3 seed, and will meet #6 Denmark, while the Italians, the #2 seed, take on the seventh-seeded Jamaicans, what do you think about this bracket, Jess? JESSE Well Tony, I've got to think this is the year of the Italians, they just won the Soccer World Cup, I think they make it 2-for-2 and come out of the European Bracket! TONY OK, Jesse Ventura, the finals of the European Bracket will be held at Wembley Arena on Saturday, August 5th! And now, onto the Asian Bracket! [img=http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v197/alfdogg/TTWCAsianBracket.jpg] The Asian bracket is led by the Japanese team, they'll be taking on the team from Belgium, which will be the 1-8 matchup, the winner of the 4-5 matchup awaits the winner of that one! At the fourth seed, it's the Aussies, and they'll be meeting Spain, who drew the #5 seed. Our 3-6 matchup in the Asian bracket will feature the Chinese team, who will be challenged by sixth-seeded Greece, and of course, Team Heyross representing these United States got the #2 seed in this bracket, and Hong Kong will be their first rival as the #7 seed. Jesse? JESSE You know who I'm goin' for, Tony Schiavone! USA all the way, Team Heyross takes it! TONY The Egg Dome in Tokyo will be the site for the finals of the Asian Bracket, and once again, Saturday, August 5th is the date! Our last bracket is the African Bracket! [img=http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v197/alfdogg/TTWCAfricanBracket.jpg] And some more controversy here, as the Egyptian team, the top representative from Africa, did not receive the #1 seed! That instead went to Lithuania, who will face India as their opposition in round 1! In the 4-5 matchup, the team from Finland will be challenged by the fifth-seeded Koreans! The #3 seed in the African bracket will be the team from Iran, who will go up against the Brazilians, and Egypt of course draws the #2 spot, and will take on the team from Thailand in our 2-7 match! Who ya got? JESSE Well, Tony, you mentioned the controversy in this bracket, but I think the Lithuanians will prove that the committee made the right decision, and they'll walk out of this bracket the winner! TONY And the site for the finals will be the Stadium known as Soccer City in South Africa! We mentioned that the tournament begins next week, there will be a week in between rounds, and, as mentioned, the finals of each bracket will take place on Saturday, August 5th, as the OAOAST is working on a TV deal that would bring us all four matches for you viewing pleasure! The winners of the brackets will be re-seeded to compete in the semifinals and finals of the tournament at AngleSlam on August 27th! It's going to be a very exciting event! Right now, let's go to...

DraftExpress.com has a rumor up that has Bonzi Wells to the Pacers for Jeff Foster and Sarunas Jasikevicius. It hasn't been confirmed by any other site, and I doubt the Kings would do that trade, anyway. Plus, Bonzi and Rick Carlisle just has "disaster" written all over it to me, and Foster is probably the last guy aside from JO and Granger that I'd want to see traded.

Heh. I remember their rookie year, I said Wade was better than Carmelo, and everyone acted like I was nuts. I don't think anyone will dispute this now.

The Pacers claimed Orien Greene off waivers.

Alfdogg will give his thoughts on his AngleSlam title defense, plus further info on the Tag Team World Cup tournament.

LeBron's extension is for 4 yrs/$60 million, with a player option after the third year. This according to ESPNNEWS

http://www.gambling911.com/Michael-Jordan-...ike-070806.html I'm not seeing it.

The Pacers could still afford Harrington, but they'd have to let Fred Jones leave. Unless the Hawks want to trade him for Jonathan Bender's contract, which is $7.8 million off the books next summer.