Ed Wood Caulfield

Great show. I am really digging the Zero Hour buildup. Everybody came through strong, as usual. By the way, I edited in the James Riggs/Colombian Heat Champion Vs. Champion match. Late as it is, I hope you all read it. There's big things poppin' in that match. Real big things.

-"Champion vs. Champion" OAOAST 24/7 CHAMPIONSHIP & OAOAST X-DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Colombian Heat (OAOAST 24/7 Champion) vs. James Riggs (OAOAST X-Division Champion with Staci)

The 24/7/X-Division Championships match will have to be post poned till next week I'm afraid.

-TRIPLE THREAT LADDER MATCH FOR THE OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix (Champion with Megan Skye) vs. "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican (Challenger with Stephen Joseph Popick and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez) vs. Zack Malibu (Challenger) -OAOAST 24/7 CHAMPIONSHIP, OAOAST X-DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIP, & OAOAST UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH James Riggs (OAOAST 24/7 Champion & OAOAST X-Division Champion with Staci) vs. Colombian Heat (Challenger)

The main event for the show has been edited in! Read it please. It's a doozy!

We return from the commercial break showing the ending of the James Riggs/Dance Dance Dragon OAOAST X-Division Championship Match. A caption appears on the bottom left hand corner reading EARLIER TONIGHT. COLE Back on HeldDOWN~!, and fans, we just witnessed a title change live on HeldDOWN~!. Dance Dance Dragon was defending the OAOAST X-Division Title against James Riggs. Now, Dragon had just given Riggs the Perfect! top rope Double Stomp. He went to a corner, when Staci began grabbing his right leg. COACH She loves him, Michael! COLE Yeah right! Anyway, Staci, James Riggs' wife, held onto Dance Dance Dragon's right leg while James got up. Dance Dance Dragon tried to escape, but couldn't. Finally, Staci let go, and James did the Rolling Koppou Kick on Dragon! Dragon was knocked out cold, but James Riggs still applied the Crossface Chicken Wing on him. The referee raised Dragon's arm three times, three times it fell. The referee called for the bell, and James Riggs became the new X-Division Champion here in Pittsburgh! But then, THIS happened. Cut to James Riggs smashing Dance Dance Dragon's left knee with the steel chair after the match while the bell rings and the crowd boos. COLE James Riggs, after the match, unleashed a BRUTAL, BARBARIC, UNNECCESARY attack on Dance Dance Dragon! He attacked his knee relentlessly. He could have possibly injured Dance Dance Dragon! COACH Well big woop. No real loss. COLE Dance Dance Dragon's career could be put to a halt, Coach! Don't you even care? COACH Not really, no. COLE GRRRR. Cut to trainers and EMTs along with Mickey Jay helping Dance Dance Dragon out of the ring. Dragon holds his left knee in pain. A caption appears on the bottom left hand corner reading DURING THE BREAK. COLE Well, during the break, trainers, EMTs helped Dance Dance Dragon out of the ring. His left knee was obviously in huge pain. Doctors are sure to have a look at it later tonight. COACH But the important thing is...that James Riggs is the NEW OAOAST X-Division Champion! COLE Coach, a man's career could be in jeopardy. Do you even care? COACH Why? It's DANCE DANCE DRAGON! If anything, this is good news as it will stop him from polluting OAOAST rings and send him back to the arcades, where he can play Dance Dance Revolution for as long as he wants by himself! COLE I care, Coach! I hope for the best, but fear for the worst! Dance Dance Dragon's knee might be shredded! COACH Oh boo-hoo! Cry me a river! I'm just glad that the OAOAST X-Division Title is on someone that deserves it for once! COLE You're something else, you know that, Coach? COACH Thank you! COLE Anyway, fans, right now, we're going to go backstage where "Mean" Gene Okeurland is standing by with the NEW OAOAST X-Division Champion, James Riggs! We're going to go to him right now. Gene? Cut to the HeldDOWN~! Interview Set where "Mean" Gene Okeurland is standing by with James Riggs and Staci. James is raising the OAOAST X-Division Championship belt over his head and yelling out, "YES! YES!" again and again, while Staci applauds and kisses her husband on the cheeks. Riggs is breathing hard but still celebrating his title victory. "MEAN" GENE OKEURLAND I'm here with the brand new OAOAST X-Division Champion, James Riggs. And JR, you defeated Dance Dance Dragon just a few minutes ago to win that Title...but then afterwards, did a HELLACIOUS attack on Dragon's left knee! What in the world was that for? JAMES RIGGS That was a message. A message to everybody in the One And Only AngleSault Thread. James Riggs is for real and James Riggs is staying for a LONNNNG time! I have finally gotten a Title in the OAOAST, and what a Title this is! The X-Division Title! A Title that should have been mine back in April has finally come home! This feels great, "Mean" Gene! After I was unfairly, unethically, ROBBED, SCREWED out of the 24/7 Title at AngleSlam, I came right back! I got back on the horse! I dusted myself off! And I defeated Dance Dance Dragon to become YOUR NEW X-Division Champion! JR Nation can celebrate again! There IS joy in JR Nation tonight! For I am coming home with some gold around my waist! WOOOOO! James kisses Staci. He raises the OAOAST X-Division Championship belt over his head again. STACI YEAH! THAT'S RIGHT! RIGGS My only regret is that that PUNK, that THUG, that LOW LIFE, Colombian Heat wasn't the man I beat! My only regret is that it wasn't him that I attacked with that chair! My only regret is that it's not Colombian Heat who will be sitting on the shelf indefinitely! If only it could have been him, then this night would have been absolutely perfect! But I can't complain! I have some gold now, and-- "YO DUDE!" The camera pans over to reveal COLOMBIAN HEAT standing next to the HeldDOWN~! Interview Set. The crowd cheers loudly. Colombian Heat has the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt over his right shoulder. He has a serious look on his face. Heat walks over to where Riggs and Staci are standing. JR's smile has faded. He now has a sneer etched on his face, same with Staci. Riggs slings the OAOAST X-Division Championship belt over his left shoulder. Colombian Heat and James Riggs stand face-to-face, each man holding a title. "Mean" Gene puts the microphone underneath Colombian Heat's lips. COLOMBIAN HEAT I saw what'chu did out there. Real nice. Attackin' a man after tha match. You already won. What more did you need to prove? RIGGS Dance Dance Dragon got my message. Did you? HEAT Yeah. I got yo' message. Dat you need yo' woman to help you win matches! RIGGS Oh real funny, Heat. You and I both know that I should be the 24/7 Champion right now! I was ROBBED at AngleSlam! If it weren't for your little boyfriend, THAT belt (points to the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt) would be around my shoulder too right about now! HEAT Oh bitch! Bitch! Bitch! Dat's all you do! Complain about what's been done! That's weak, G! Stop livin' in the past, son! What's done is done! Live wit it! RIGGS Oh I'll live with it all right! With this! (points to the OAOAST X-Division Championship belt) But you, Heat, have to live with the fact that YOU. CAN'T. BEAT. ME! YOU CAN NEVER BEAT ME! YOU NEVER COULD AND YOU NEVER WILL! Colombian Heat chuckles. HEAT You know, I'm REALLY startin' to get sick of you! Sick of you runnin' yo' mouth. Tell you what I'ma gonna do. Next week, I want you to put yo' money where your mouth is. I'll face you in a match for the 24/7 Title! But this will be your final shot, a'ight? After that, no mo'. I don't wanna deal wit you no mo'! RIGGS That's cool. That's real cool, 'G'. I'll gladly accept that challenge. And in fact, I am SO confident that I will beat you...I'm going to go ahead and put the X-Division Title on the line too! Title for Title. Champion vs. Champion. Winner Takes All! One man leaves with both Titles...the loser leaves with none! How's that sound? HEAT Dat sounds mighty fine, dawg! RIGGS So, we got ourselves a deal? HEAT Ain't no thang but a chicken wang, son! RIGGS I'll take that as a 'Yes'. HEAT Fine. I'll see youse next week! RIGGS I'll see you then. And may the best man win! Riggs puts his right hand out. Colombian Heat is hesitant, and so is the crowd, but then accepts the handshake. But then James Riggs pulls Heat in, and the two get into a staredown. Both men eye each other IN ANGER~! breathing hard. Staci watches in the middle. "MEAN" GENE OKEURLAND How about that? What a match for next week's HeldDOWN~! Champion vs. Champion! Colombian Heat vs. James Riggs! It's the 24/7 Champion vs. the X-Division Champion! Winner Takes All! What a match that's going to be! Michael, Coach, back to you! Cut to Sofa Central with Jonathan "Da Coach" Coachman and Michael Cole. COLE What an announcement we just heard! A Champion vs. Champion match next week on HeldDOWN~! Colombian Heat puts the 24/7 Title on the line against James Riggs and his X-Division Title! This rivalry has certainly *heated* up, no pun intended! COACH Today just keeps getting better for my man, Riggs! JR got the X-Division Title tonight, and next week, he FINALLY gets the 24/7 Title! He's going to show the world that AngleSlam was just a slight road block for JR! It's smooth sailing for James Riggs from now on! HA HA! COLE James Riggs gets another shot at the 24/7 Championship next week! Will he add another belt to his collection? Or will his X-Division Championship reign last exactly one week? What a match that's certainly going to be! James Riggs vs. Colombian Heat! Title for Title! Champion vs. Champion! Winner Takes All! It's going to happen next week on OAOAST HeldDOWN~! Fans, that's all the time we have for this week's HeldDOWN~!. We'll see you all next week for more exciting OAOAST action! For Jonathan Coachman, I'm Michael Cole, saying so long from Pittsburgh and we'll see you next week from Dayton, Ohio for more HeldDOWN~! COACH Peace out y'all! FADE OUT

-OAOAST X-DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Dance Dance Dragon (Champion) vs. James Riggs (Challenger with Staci) -James Riggs segment

This match opens the show, please. Sorry if it's a bit long. I really got into it at the end! A piano plays a melody causing the crowd to cheer. The lights go down in MSG, turning back on in tune with the melody. *"COME ON!"* *BOOM~!* Fireworks explode over the ring, due to the fact that the entrance is so short. "Gasolina (Remix)" by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil' Jon and Pitbull begins playing. "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE And what better way to start off AngleSlam then with some Heat? The AngleSlam entrance doors slide open, and out charges Colombian Heat. The crowd gets louder. Heat carries the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt with his left hand. He jumps up and down to get the crowd more fired up then they are already. Heat then raises the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt over his head, and then slings the belt over his left shoulder. Colombian Heat raises his hands, acknowledging the fans, then points all over Madison Square Garden and begins his walk to the ring, slapping hands with the fans along the way. *DING DING DING* MICHAEL BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is the opening match here at OAOAST AngleSlam 2007 and is scheduled for one fall with a thirty-minute time limit. And it is for the One And Only AngleSault Thread Twenty-Four/Seven Championship. Introducing first, coming down the aisle. Originally from Bogotá, Colombia but now residing in Miami, Florida. Weighing in at 180 lbs. He is the reigning and defending One And Only AngleSault Thread Twenty-Four/Seven Champion of the worrrrrrlllllldddddddddddddddddddddddddd....COLOMBIANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT! Colombian Heat climbs up the ring steps and then hops into the ring. Heat gets on the second ring rope and raises the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt with his left hand, receiving cheers. Heat smiles a wide smile. He then heads on over to a second turnbuckle and raises the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt with his left hand, and does the "WESTSIIIIIIIDE" hand signal with his right hand, receiving more cheers. Heat gets off the second turnbuckle and calls for a microphone. COLE We begin AngleSlam 2007 with a title match! And what a title match it should be! Colombian Heat to go head-to-head with James Riggs, a man who already has ONE victory over Colombian Heat, and has been on a roll since then! COACH All the signs are pointing to a James Riggs victory! Colombian Heat has been made a victim, a fool of several times over the past month! From losing to Riggs on OAOAST Syndicated to getting his ass kicked after his rap concert. James Riggs has Colombian Heat's number tonight at AngleSlam! COLE We shall see, Coach. But I'm sure Colombian Heat is fired up for tonight. And I'm sure he won't go down without a fight! Colombian Heat grabs a microphone. COLOMBIAN HEAT Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! YO! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Colombian Heat looks at the crowd. "Gasolina (Remix)" by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil' Jon and Pitbull dies down. HEAT We is in tha Garden tonight! We is havin' ourselves a Garden party! And you know, Colombian Heat is gonna kick it, gonna set things off right herre in New York Ciz-zay! CHEAP POP! Colombian Heat slings the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt over his left shoulder. He smiles. HEAT A'ight. A'ight. Now, when I say 'Is everrybody ready for AngleSlam 2007?' I want all of y'all to say 'Damn straight!'. A'ight? So...is everrybody ready for AngleSlam 2007? "DAMMMMMMMMNNNNNN STRAIGHT!" The crowd cheers again! Colombian Heat nods his head. HEAT (CONT'D) Dat's right. Dat's right. Well, since I's know tha answer to dat question, that means there's only one thing left to say: If all of y'all are ready to see me make James Riggs feel the Heat...then New York City, Madison Square Garden...make some noise UP IN THIS-- "BI-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" The crowd cheers loudly. A "HEAT!" chant breaks out. COLE What an ovation for Colombian Heat here in Madison Square Garden. They're on their feet here in the Garden! HEAT Ha! Ha! You know how we do! Colombian Heat puts the microphone away. Heat kisses the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt and hands it over to referee Nick Patrick. COACH He just kissed that 24/7 Title goodbye! COLE You don't know that for sure, Coach. The fans certainly believe in Heat tonight. COACH That ovation he got will be the ONLY ovation he'll get tonight! JR Nation, get ready to celebrate! Your man's about to get a title in the OAOAST! Colombian Heat bounces off the ropes. He looks to the entrance and waits for James Riggs to come out. COLE This will be the first time Colombian Heat defends the 24/7 Title, and he's got quite the opponent here tonight! COACH About time too. He went over the 30-day limit. He should have been stripped of the Title! COLE Oh will you stop? "Dani California" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers starts playing. The crowd stands up and starts booing. The entrance doors slide open, and James Riggs steps out. Right behind him as always is his wife and manager, Staci. The boos get louder. Riggs has a cocky smile on his face as he laughs off the booing fans. Staci walks out in front of Riggs and leads Riggs to the ring. BUFFER And his opponent. The challenger. Accompanied to the ring by his wife and manager, Staci. From Torrence, California. Weighing in at 232 lbs. He is the self-proclaimed leader of JR Nation. JAMMMMMEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS RIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! James Riggs struts down the aisle, taunting some fans along the way. COLE James Riggs has been in the OAOAST for only 10 months, but tonight, he looks to gain his first title in the company! COACH James Riggs has everything going for him. Great looks, great talent, intelligence, a beautiful wife, and after tonight, a title to call his own. He is everything Colombian Heat is not, which is why he will defeat him tonight at AngleSlam. COLE Riggs has been waiting for this match ever since he got a PINFALL victory over Colombian Heat last month on OAOAST Syndicated, which is how he got this 24/7 Title shot in the first place! It was his Rolling Koppou Kick that did Heat in last time, with a little help from Staci. And you can bet James Riggs hopes that Rolling Koppou Kick brings him the 24/7 Title tonight! Staci and JR climb the ring steps and stand on the ring apron. Colombian Heat eyes Riggs intensely. Staci sits on the middle rope, and opens them for JR to step through. Riggs outstretches his arms and then heads to a second turnbuckle where he pounds his chest twice with crossed arms, before cockily thrusting them into the air. White pyro shoots along the ring apron behind him ala Shawn Michaels, before meeting at the ring post which explodes into a golden shower of sparklers. COACH Look at that entrance! THAT is the entrance of a champion! James Riggs is the uncrowned 24/7 Champion as far as I am concerned! COLE Alot of people are predicting the same thing, Coach. There are many who feel this is James Riggs night! COACH Those are some smart smart people then! Staci blows her husband a kiss as he gets off the second turnbuckle. Colombian Heat is at another turnbuckle corner and is staring at Riggs. "Dani California" continues playing as Staci removes James' long white/silver leather trenchcoat revealing his silver and black pants. She then takes off his sunglasses and places them on top of the long white/silver leather trenchcoat. COLE It can be certainly argued that James Riggs has all the momentum leading up to this match. Let's recap what he's done in the past four weeks. He has defeated Colombian Heat in an one-on-one match. He took the mask of Colombian Heat's best friend, Spanish Fly, revealing his face to the world. And who could forget two weeks ago, when after Colombian Heat's rap performance, James Riggs appeared and SPEARED Colombian Heat, following that up by giving him the Rolling Koppou Kick on the stage, and busting him open? COACH He ruined Colombian Heat's big night, and for that I'm thankful! In front of all those fans at The Aloha Stadium, James Riggs ruined the Colombian Heat Rap Concert! What a great moment in wrestling history! COLE Colombian Heat hasn't forgotten about what James Riggs has done to him recently, I can tell you that much! He's looking for some payback, not just for him, but for Spanish Fly tonight here at AngleSlam! COACH Well, he's gonna choke. It's obvious to everyone that James Riggs is the superior athlete, and he will beat Colombian Heat tonight at AngleSlam! Remember, he did it once. He can do it again! Staci kisses James on the lips and then says something to Colombian Heat before laughing. Riggs holds the ropes open for Staci to exit, carrying Riggs' sunglasses and leather trenchcoat. Riggs looks at her ass as she walks down the ring steps. JR then turns his attention to his opponent tonight, flashing a cocky smile. COLE Boy does he look confident. COACH He has every right to be. This is HIS night! I can feel it! COLE Several titles to be defended tonight at AngleSlam, including the World Heavyweight Title in the main event! Staci hands the leather trenchcoat and the sunglasses to a ringside attendant. Riggs and Colombian Heat mouth off to each other, with Riggs bouncing up and down in place while doing his trash talking. "Dani California" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers dies down. Colombian Heat exits the ring and heads to ringside where he puts the extra Colombian flag bandana he was wearing around the neck of a young fan. COLE Awww, isn't that sweet? Colombian Heat loves the kids! COACH No he doesn't. He just wants them to buy his merchandise! COLE Oh come on! Can't Colombian Heat do something nice without there being an ulterior motive? COACH Nope! Now, if it was James Riggs doing that, THEN it would be a different story! COLE I think James Riggs would spit on a child before giving anything to one! COACH Cole! That's a TERRIBLE thing to say! You know he could sue you for slander! COLE Oh come on! Colombian Heat high fives the young fan and then returns to the ring. Heat stretches on the ropes. Nick Patrick raises the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt over his head to let the crowd know that this is a title match. He then hands the belt over to a ringside attendant. Nick Patrick then pats down Colombian Heat, and then James Riggs. COACH Pat him down good, ref. Heat's a thug. He could have a gun or brass knucks somewhere on his body! COLE Coach, if anyone needs patting down it's Riggs. Although his weapon of choice might be on the outside! COACH Staci is a lady, not a weapon. Don't you treat her like an object! COLE That's rich coming from you! COACH Psh to you, Mikey Cole! After the patting down is over with, Nick Patrick gives the two combatants some last minute instructions before finally calling for the bell. *DING DING DING* [b]OPENING MATCH OAOAST 24/7 CHAMPIONSHIP COLOMBIAN HEAT (Champion) vs. JAMES RIGGS (Challenger with Staci)[/b] The crowd pops for the bell ringing. Colombian Heat and James Riggs stare at each other from opposite corners of the ring. Heat looks serious, while Riggs has a cocky smirk on his face. Heat and Riggs walk away from the turnbuckles and circle each other in the ring. COLE And here we go! The opening contest of AngleSlam 2007 is underway! The OAOAST 24/7 Title is on the line in what is most certainly the biggest match of James Riggs OAOAST career thus far! COACH This is his night, Cole! COLE 20,000 plus are on hand! Madison Square Garden is sold out! And who knows how many millions of fans around the world are watching! And they're all ready for AngleSlam! Colombian Heat and James Riggs lock up. Both men jockey for position, but then let go. They circle each other again. Riggs continues mouthing off to Heat. The two men lock up again. Colombian Heat grabs a headlock on Riggs! Heat cinches the hold tight. Riggs grabs at Heat's Colombian flag bandana to pull his head back. With his hand on the bandana, JR takes Colombian Heat into the ropes and shoves him off into the opposite ropes. Heat fires back with a shoulderblock, knocking JR down! Heat then bounces off the ropes, leaps over James Riggs, and then bounces off the opposite ropes. Riggs gets up, tries to give Heat a hiptoss, but Colombian Heat reverses, and gives Riggs a hiptoss of his own! COLE Colombian Heat is on fire as this match starts! COACH Oy. Bad pun. James Riggs rolls out of the ring. He stops to take a breather. Colombian Heat meanwhile does a SHIMMY~! to pop the crowd! Staci quickly goes to her husband's aid. COLE I don't think James Riggs expected Colombian Heat to be this ready for their match after what happened two weeks ago! COACH Colombian Heat just got lucky is all! That surprised Riggs! But don't worry, Riggs is gonna come back! You'll see! He'll come back! Colombian Heat motions for Riggs to come back into the ring. Riggs points a menacingly finger at the current OAOAST 24/7 Champion. Staci tries to calm JR down by massaging his back and shoulders. COACH Say Staci, I'm feeling a little tensed too. Mind if you massage me as well? COLE She can't hear you, Coach. COACH HEY STACI-- COLE Quiet down! Heat continues motioning for JR to return to the ring. Riggs looks a little hesitant to get back in. But after some pushing from Staci, JR kisses Staci on the lips and slides back into the ring. COACH There. NOW, the match can begin for real! Colombian Heat and James Riggs stare at each other again. They lock up. Colombian Heat grabs another headlock on JR. Riggs pulls on Heat's bandana once again, pulling his head back. Riggs uses the bandana to shove Colombian Heat into the ropes. But Heat is one step ahead of Riggs, running forward and using his legs to grab James Riggs' arms and roll him up with a crucifix pin! 1... 2... KICK OUT!!! COLE The match almost ended right there! Riggs tries to attack Heat, but the Colombian superstar is one step ahead again, grabbing JR and bringing him down to the mat with another headlock! COACH Damn it! Come on now! CH cinches the hold tight. Staci roots her husband on, but she's the only one doing so. James Riggs once again pulls on the front of Colombian Heat's bandana, pulling his head back. He pulls him back enough that Heat's head is now on the mat. Riggs uses this to his advantage, getting on his knees while still in the headlock. COACH There we go. There we go! Riggs soon gets on his left knee. Colombian Heat decides to stand up while still applying the headlock. Riggs takes Heat to the ropes, and shoves him off into the opposite ropes. HOWEVER, Heat holds onto James Riggs' long blonde hair, and pulls himself back into another headlock, bringing the two of them onto the mat! COACH Now wait a minute! He pulled his hair! Come on! That was unfair! COLE Heat is just using his surroundings to his advantage. COACH That's bull, Cole, and you know it! Colombian Heat, that low-life thug, was clearly cheating there! No hair-pulling is allowed in a match! Colombian Heat is clearly trying to get himself disqualified so that he can keep his Title! COLE I don't think Colombian Heat is thinking that far, Coach. COACH You're right. He doesn't think. The referee does admonish Heat for the hair-pulling. Once he does that, JR once again grabs Heat's bandana, pulling his head onto the mat. Heat escapes and gets up, still applying the headlock on Riggs. Staci looks on as Riggs shoves Colombian Heat into the ropes and then shoves him off of them--only to get pulled back into the headlock when Colombian Heat grabs ahold of his blonde hair again! COACH See! He did it again! I'm telling you! He's trying to get himself disqualified! COLE Will you stop with that? He's trying to do no such thing! COACH Yes he is! He's using the hair! He's cheating! That thug! Heat cinches the headlock on tight. Riggs, like always, pulls Colombian Heat's bandana until Heat's head is on the mat. Heat stands up, still applying the headlock on Riggs. Riggs takes Heat into the ropes. There, Riggs knees Heat in the stomach! This gets a round of applause from Staci. COLE James Riggs with some offense finally in this match! COACH And it's only the beginning baby! Only the beginning! James Riggs punches Colombian Heat in the face. Riggs then grabs Heat's left arm, and gives him an Irish whip into the opposite ropes. Riggs goes for a clothesline. Heat ducks, bounces off the opposite ropes, leaps onto the second rope, and does a backflip, landing on the mat, grabbing Riggs in the process to give him a reverse DDT! COLE Asai DDT from Colombian Heat! It could be all over! 1... 2... 3-KICK OUT! COACH Phew! Colombian Heat picks James Riggs up, and whips him into the ropes. He follows that up with an AJ Styles-like dropkick! Heat immediately stands up and bounces off the ropes again. This time he does the "Where The Hood At!?" (Rolling Thunder) onto Riggs! COLE Colombian Heat not letting up! Here's the cover! ONE! TWO! KICK OUT!!!! Colombian Heat stays on the mat, grabbing Riggs and applying a headlock on him! COLE And back to the headlock goes Colombian Heat. COACH Make sure he's not pulling any hair, ref! Staci is slapping the mat, trying to get her man back into the match. She paces back and forth at ringside. Heat cinches the headlock tight. Nick Patrick checks on Riggs. STACI COME ON! COME ON! COACH Yeah! Come on Riggs! Win it for your wifey! Riggs pulls on Colombian Heat's bandana once again! He keeps doing this, standing up in the process while still trapped in the headlock. JR takes Heat into the ring ropes. There, he escapes the headlock, and fires off with a knife-edged chop across Heat's chest! "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COACH I don't care if you're wearing a shirt like Heat, those chops STING! COLE Indeed they do, Coach. And now, James Riggs is back on offense. Now a little more confident than before, James Riggs grabs Colombian Heat by his bandana and left arm and whips him into the ropes. Riggs tries for a clothesline, but Colombian Heat ducks, stops in his tracks, and nails Riggs with a spinning heel kick to a pop! Riggs gets right back up, so CH grabs JR and takes him over to a turnbuckle corner. Colombian Heat punches Riggs in the face several times, and then gives him a whip into the opposite turnbuckle--Riggs reverses--Colombian Heat hits the turnbuckle back-first HARD! Heat stumbles out of the turnbuckle and into a scoop and a slam from Riggs! Riggs goes to grab Heat's legs, but gets kicked off! Riggs gets right back up at the same time as Heat. Heat scoops Riggs up and gives him a slam HARD onto the mat! Heat goes to grab Riggs' legs, but gets kicked off! Riggs is up and punching Colombian Heat in the face! He gives him an Irish whip into the ropes. JR goes for a clothesline, but Heat ducks, grabs Riggs from behind, and nails him with the Gangsta Slam! COLE Gangsta Slam from Colombian Heat! Heat goes for the cover! 1...2...KICK OUT! COLE So far, the 24/7 Champion has had the advantage in this match-up! COACH So? It's not how the match begins...it's how the match ENDS that counts! And this match WILL end with James Riggs holding the 24/7 Title belt! You can bank on that! Heat grabs Riggs, and gets scratched in the eyes! COACH Yes! Ha! Ha! Way to go! COLE James Riggs with an unfair tactic to gain the advantage! COACH Hey, you do what you gotta do to win matches! COLE But just a few moments ago you was complaining about Colombian Heat pulling James Riggs' hair! COACH He was pulling his hair, not scratching his eyes. The hair is more important than the eyes! COLE Oh come on! Riggs bounces off the ropes and nails Heat with a shoulderblock, knocking him down to the mat! Riggs then stomps on Colombian Heat to Staci's delight. STACI That's right, baby! That's right! Riggs heads to a turnbuckle corner. He waits for Colombian Heat to get up. Once Colombian Heat is on his knees, Riggs charges forward and gives Colombian Heat a soccer-like kick to the stomach! COACH Ooh! Look at that! A soccer kick to the soccer player! COLE Colombian Heat did play soccer before his career in professional wrestling. COACH And I bet Riggs' kick was better than any kick Colombian Heat ever threw! Staci applauds James for the kick. Colombian Heat is coughing now. Riggs eyes Colombian Heat with dangerous intent in a turnbuckle corner. COLE Colombian Heat feeling the effects of that kick to the stomach from James Riggs! COACH Come on! Come on! Come on Staci! Get Riggs motivated! Get him on the ball! Make sure he wins the 24/7 Title tonight! COLE She can't hear you, Coach. COACH She can. We have a telepathic connection. COLE :huh: Staci looks on, nodding her head, as James Riggs sizes Colombian Heat up again. Once Heat is on his knees, Riggs charges forward, and nails Colombian Heat with another kick to the stomach! This time, the kick sends Colombian Heat out of the ring and onto the floor! COLE Oh my! What a kick from James Riggs! The Champion is down! COACH Oh! What a kick! What a beautiful kick from James Riggs! Now watch, Colombian Heat is probably going to take the countout victory! Colombian Heat lies on the protective mats clutching his stomach in pain. "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" COLE 20,000 fans are chanting 'Let's Go Heat!' It's quite obvious who they want to win tonight! COACH Well, when James Riggs wins the 24/7 Title, JR Nation will be there right behind him celebrating. And right behind him because Riggs wants the spotlight all to himself. COLE Why am I not surprised? Nick Patrick is administering his 10 count. This causes JR to exit the ring and grab Colombian Heat. He stands him up...and then chops him across the chest, knocking him back down! COACH Good gravy, that was a good chop! Riggs grabs Heat again and throws him back into the ring. COLE James Riggs knows that he cannot win the Title via countout. He must either pin Colombian Heat or make him submit! COACH And he's done one of those things before, Michael! COLE Indeed he has, Coach. COACH And he's gonna do it again or make Heat submit to the Crossface Chicken Wing tonight! Look at Heat! He's having trouble breathing! Indeed, Colombian Heat is coughing alot in the ring. James Riggs doesn't care though, sneering at his opponent. Riggs looks at Colombian Heat with utter disdain as he picks him up. Riggs grabs Heat's right arm and delivers an Irish whip into the ropes. Heat bounces off the ropes, into a BAAAACK Body Drop from James Riggs! However, Heat lands on the ring apron. Riggs goes for a shot, BLOCKED by Colombian Heat! Heat punches Riggs to the crowd's cheers, but Riggs blocks a punch and fires with one of his own! Riggs nails Colombian Heat with several punches to the temple, finishing off by taking a few steps back and charging forward, knocking Heat into the barricade! COLE Oh! And Colombian Heat hits the barricade! COACH Yes! Yes! Beautiful move by James Riggs! Absolutely beautiful! Can we see that again? The OAOAST Starbucks(TM) Double Shot Instant Replay shows Colombian Heat hitting the barricade from two different angles. COACH Look at that! BAM! Colombian Heat knocked into the barricade! Look at that! And again! BAM! Knocked right into the barricade! Colombian Heat is out, Michael! He is out! Referee Nick Patrick has begun his 10 count again. Colombian Heat is slumped over on the barricade breathing hard. Riggs exits the ring and grabs Colombian Heat, throwing him back into the ring. JR picks Heat up and goes for a punch. BLOCKED! Colombian Heat fires off with a forearm! Then another forearm! Then another forearm! Then another forearm! The forearm shots take James Riggs over to a turnbuckle, where Heat proceeds to continue laying in the forearm shots! COLE Colombian Heat with those forearm shots to James Riggs' face! COACH Careful! You're going to make Riggs as ugly as you are! CH whips JR into the opposite turnbuckle--Riggs reverses--Colombian Heat grabs the top rope just as Riggs charges forward. Heat lands behind Riggs, grabs him, turns him around so that they're both facing the ring, and quickly gives Riggs The Bong Hit~! COLE The Bong Hit! The Bong Hit! Colombian Heat could have it! Heat covers Riggs with the excited crowd counting along. 1... 2... 2 1/2 RIGHT SHOULDER UP! COACH Yes! COLE That was not it! The match continues! COACH Oh thank God! Staci wipes the sweat off of her forehead. Colombian Heat, meanwhile, grabs Riggs' by his long hair and picks him up. Only to get punched in the stomach in return. Riggs punches Heat again and again, until it is Heat bended over and not him. Riggs bounces off the ropes, and hits Heat with a clothesline, knocking him down to the mat! JR then goes back to stomping on Heat, drawing the ire of the crowd. Riggs responds by telling the crowd to "SHUT UP!" This doesn't help matters. Staci also says, "SHUT UP!", but gets rude comments in return. James Riggs picks up Colombian Heat and slams his face on the top turnbuckle pad. Heat falls to the mat, using the top ring rope to keep himself from falling completely onto the mat. Riggs picks Colombian Heat up again and sets him against the turnbuckle. *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Colombian Heat walks on over to another turnbuckle. There, Riggs grabs him and goes for a snapmare. Heat won't budge, so Riggs grabs Heat by his left hand and whips him into the opposite turnbuckle. Heat hits the turnbuckle back-first HARD! So hard, that he collapses onto the mat! COLE Colombian Heat has a history of neck problems, and it looks like James Riggs is trying to add back problems to that list! Staci applauds James for that move. Nick Patrick checks on Colombian Heat. COACH The ring shook with that move! The ring actually shook! Riggs goes for the cover. COACH New Champion! ONE! TWO! KICK OUT! COLE Not yet, Coach. Calm down. COACH Rats! James Riggs argues about the count to the referee. He then forgets about arguing and heads to a turnbuckle corner. There, Riggs waits for Colombian Heat to get up. COLE What's Riggs going to do now? Once Colombian Heat sits up, Riggs charges forward, jumping up over Colombian Heat, grabbing his head in the process, and landing onto the mat, which causes Colombian Heat's head to snap down and back up! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE What a move from James Riggs, shades of the legendary late great Curt Hennig! Riggs goes for the cover. 1......2......KICK OUT! COACH I thought that was it! COLE So did Staci. COACH Wow! We have something in common! That's great! COLE Oh will you stop? Riggs argues the count with the referee again. But Nick Patrick maintains it was a fair count. COACH No matter. The end is near for Colombian Heat's 24/7 Title reign! The end is near! I can feel it! COLE Colombian Heat is in trouble now, this much is true! "HEAT!" "HEAT!" "HEAT!" "HEAT!" COLE 20,000 fans are chanting for Colombian Heat! COACH Let 'em chant. It'll be all for naught soon! JR picks Colombian Heat up. He takes him into the ring ropes, where he whips him into the opposite ropes. Colombian Heat reverses! Heat puts his head down, so Riggs kicks Heat in the face! He follows that up with a dropkick, knocking Colombian Heat down onto the mat! The cover! It gets two! COLE James Riggs doing everything he can to make sure he leaves Madison Square Garden the new OAOAST 24/7 Champion! COACH That's right, baby! His time has arrived! James Riggs is getting the gold tonight, HA HA! Riggs punches Colombian Heat in the face on the mat. JR picks CH up and takes him over to a turnbuckle corner. Riggs grabs Heat in a facelock, puts Heat's left arm over his head, and then grabs his orange basketball shorts and lifts Colombian Heat up, sitting him on the top turnbuckle. Riggs climbs the second turnbuckle, grabs Colombian Heat in a facelock again, places Heat's left arm over his head, and grabs Heat's orange basketball shorts. NO! Colombian Heat slips out and punches Riggs from the top turnbuckle! The crowd comes alive! COLE James Riggs is in trouble on the second turnbuckle! COACH Look out, look out, look out! Riggs punches back! Heat punches back! Riggs punches back! Heat punches back! Riggs punches back! He punches again! And again! And again! Riggs grabs Heat in a facelock, places Heat's left arm over his head, and grabs Heat's orange basketball shorts. He then falls off the second turnbuckle... SUPERPLEX!!! Riggs rolls through so that he is on top of Colombian Heat! ONE! TWO! THREE!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! COLE That wasn't it! That wasn't it! Riggs piefaces the referee! He does it again! And again! This causes the referee to stand up and yell at JR. The crowd cheers because of this. COLE Riggs doesn't want to get disqualified! He won't win the 24/7 Title that way! COACH Tell him to keep cool, Staci! Tell him to keep cool! The 24/7 Title is on the line here! Don't let him blow it! COLE She can't hear you. COACH She can sense my thoughts. COLE What? Riggs mutters something naughty to the referee, something about his mama. Colombian Heat is already starting to get up, so James Riggs helps him by picking him up and taking him over to a turnbuckle corner. Riggs trash talks Colombian Heat, who is now feeling very fatigued. Riggs wipes the sweat off of his forehead and flicks it at Heat. James Riggs then slaps Colombian Heat right across the face! COLE James Riggs is oozing with confidence now! COACH A champion has a right to be confident! COLE But he's not 24/7 Champion yet! COACH *Yet* being the key word here! He will be, in only a few moments! He will! He will! James Riggs slaps Colombian Heat across the face again! Riggs taunts the current OAOAST 24/7 Champion, telling him that the title is coming home with him tonight! JAMES RIGGS THAT TITLE IS MINE! IT'S MINE! DO YOU HEAR THAT!? DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT!? THAT TITLE IS GOING TO BE MINE! I'M TAKING IT HOME WITH ME TONIGHT! YOU AREN'T! YOU'RE GOING DOWN, HEAT! I OWN YOUR ASS, HEAT! Riggs simply throws Colombian Heat onto the mat by his head, HARD! COACH James Riggs knows he can beat him! It's just a matter of time! He KNOWS this title is his, so he's relaxed a little. COLE That might prove to be a fatal error, Coach. Anytime you have a chance to beat somebody, you do it, otherwise it might come back to haunt you for the rest of your life! COACH And how many matches have you won? Thought so. "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" Riggs picks Colombian Heat up. He gives him an Irish Whip into the ropes. Colombian Heat bounces off the ropes. Right into a sleeperhold from James Riggs! COLE Sleeperhold! Sleeperhold on Colombian Heat! COACH Goodnight! This match is over! We're going to have a new 24/7 Champion! Finally! Staci is squealing in delight. James Riggs has the sleeperhold locked on tight. Nick Patrick is checking on Heat. "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" "LET'S GO HEAT!" Colombian Heat is on his knees now. He is flailing his arms around, desperately trying to grab something, anything. Riggs cinches the hold tight, taunting Heat while doing so. Nick Patrick is still checking on Colombian Heat. COACH Look at him! He's fading fast! Indeed, Colombian Heat's eyes are only half open. Heat falls to the mat. The crowd is still chanting for Heat. Riggs mouths, "It's over! It's over!" Riggs falls to his knees still applying the sleeperhold. Riggs now has an evil smile on his face as Colombian Heat slumps down onto the mat. COLE Colombian Heat trapped in the sleeperhold, and I don't know if he'll be able to escape this! We might possibly have a new 24/7 Champion tonight here at AngleSlam! COACH We will, Michael! We will! Colombian Heat's eyes are closed. Staci is downright giddy, feeling that the end is near. Nick Patrick decides that now is the time to do the 3 count. He raises Colombian Heat's right arm. It falls. "ONE!" COACH Oh boy! Here we go! This is it! This is it! COLE Colombian Heat a few seconds away from losing the OAOAST 24/7 Title! Nick Patrick raises Colombian Heat's right arm again. It falls. "TWO!" COACH Yes! This is it! This is it! Staci is about ready to jump up and down in celebration. The crowd is anxious. James Riggs' smile gets bigger and bigger. He nods his head and laughs manically. Colombian Heat, groggy and in pain, is still locked in the sleeperhold. Nick Patrick raises Colombian Heat's right arm in the air. It stays up. "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COACH WHAT!? Oh no! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! The crowd comes alive again. Staci can't believe it. And neither can James Riggs, who is shaking his head! Colombian Heat is twirling his first finger. Heat starts shaking his fists. Riggs still can't believe it. COLE It looks like Colombian Heat is making a comeback! COACH Oh no! Oh no! Cinch up! Cinch up! Staci doesn't know what to do now. Heat sits up. The sleeperhold is still locked on. Colombian Heat gets on his left knee. Riggs is yelling, "NO!" Heat gets to a vertical base. James Riggs still has the sleeperhold applied. COLE Colombian Heat is back up! Colombian Heat elbows Riggs in the stomach! He does it again! And again! And again! And again! Finally, Riggs lets go. Colombian Heat bounces off the ropes, wraps his legs around James Riggs' arms. COLE Look at this! Another crucifix? James Riggs falls to the mat, crushing Colombian Heat in the process! COACH Guess not. Riggs covers Colombian Heat by resting on top of him. He outstretches his arms while the referee counts. 1... 2... RIGHT SHOULDER UP! COACH That was a fast count! COLE No it wasn't! COACH Yes it was! You need eyeglasses, Mikey Cole! Riggs can't believe that wasn't the finish either. COACH This may be the worst officiating I've ever seen. COLE Oh, will you stop? Now James Riggs is breathing hard. JR takes a deep breath and picks Colombian Heat up by his head. He takes Heat over to a turnbuckle corner. *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Suddenly, Colombian Heat gets a sudden burst of energy and grabs James Riggs, throwing him into the same turnbuckle corner! He then starts chopping him across the chest! *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Colombian Heat unleashes a combination of chops and punches on James Riggs! COLE Colombian Heat going to work on James Riggs! The crowd is starting to get hotter and hotter the longer Colombian Heat beats up James Riggs. Heat then switches to martial arts kicks all over James Riggs' body! COACH Oh I am SOOO sure he learned that while in the ghetto! The martial arts kicks further weaken James Riggs. Heat finishes things up with a jumping back kick to Riggs' jaw! This causes Riggs to slump onto the bottom turnbuckle! "YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COACH Oh no. Oh God no. COLE Heat is feeling it! New York City is feeling it! COACH Not that stupid move again! James Riggs' head rests on the bottom turnbuckle pad. Colombian Heat looks at the crowd and smiles a wide smile. He nods his head. Heat yells out, "YEAH-UH~!" like he's Lil' Jon. Heat jogs on over to the opposite turnbuckle and sizes James Riggs up. Staci is shaking her head. COLE Here it comes, Coach! COACH Oh God! Colombian Heat does the "low-rider" hand gesture, and then charges forward. Broncobuster! COLE Broncobuster! Broncobuster on James Riggs! Broncobuster on James Riggs! The crowd goes wild! Colombian Heat gets off of James Riggs and does a SHIMMY~! to the crowd's delight. Staci acts like she's going to vomit. COACH That move should be banned from professional wrestling forever! What does it even DO exactly!? What is it supposed to hurt!? COLE It targets the throat. I think. CH pulls JR up from the bottom turnbuckle. He then takes Riggs back to the turnbuckle, so that he can whip him into the opposite turnbuckle--NO--James reverses. Colombian Heat hits the turnbuckle back-first HARD! COLE OH MY! What a shot! James Riggs heads to the opposite turnbuckle. COACH He's going for it! He's going for the Rolling Koppou Kick! COLE He might be, Coach! COACH Not might, *is*! James Riggs charges at Colombian Heat, does a forward cartwheel, and then sends his right foot crashing into the skull of Colombian Heat-- NO!!!! Colombian Heat moves out of the way, and James Riggs' right foot hits the turnbuckle! COLE No! Colombian Heat escaped just in time! Riggs quickly pulls his right foot away from the turnbuckle. However, he walks right into a punch from Colombian Heat! Then another! And another! Colombian Heat DANCES~! And then punches James Riggs for a fourth time, knocking him down to the mat! COLE Shake, Rattle, & Roll from Colombian Heat! Colombian Heat looks down at JR, and then bounces off the ropes, does a SHIMMY~!, and then drops a knee right onto the head of James Riggs! COLE And he follows that up with a Shaky Leg Kneedrop! Colombian Heat goes for the cover! It gets two! Heat picks James Riggs up. He punches Riggs in the face! He does it again! And again! The punches send JR into a turnbuckle corner. Heat grabs Riggs by his hair, and simply throws him onto the mat by his hair, HARD. Riggs goes flying all the way to the end of the ring where his crotch hits the ring post! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE Good God! COACH You MONSTER! You could have just destroyed James Riggs Jr.! I was never against abortion until now! Staci shrieked when James hit the ring post. Heat chuckles at Riggs' misfortune. Riggs still has his legs around the ring post. COLE Riggs' might sound a little higher from now on! COACH Don't make jokes at a time like this! James Riggs is in serious trouble now! REALLY big trouble! Staci checks on her man until Heat comes and drags Riggs away from the ring post by his long blonde hair. COLE Colombian Heat is gaining confidence with each second that goes by! Colombian Heat hooks James Riggs up. Flatliner! COLE Pimp Juice! Colombian Heat goes for the cover. 1...2....KICK OUT! COLE No! It wasn't three! The match must continue! COACH Well, at least there's that! Heat is a little frustrated, but he strides on. Heat exits the ring and climbs the top rope. COLE Heat is gonna fly. You know Colombian Heat is dangerous up on that top rope! COACH Yes I know. Look out, Riggs! Look out! Colombian Heat is perched up on the top rope. He waits for James Riggs to get up. COLE Riggs might be in big trouble when he gets up! COACH Look out! Damn it! Can't he listen!? Heat is motioning for JR to get up. Riggs sits up. Riggs slowly gets on his left knee. HEAT Come on fool! Get up! Staci is worried for her husband. Riggs is slowly getting to his feet. COACH I can't bare to watch! COLE Pipe down, Coach! James Riggs is up on his feet. He is a little dazed and confused though. So it's no surprise that Colombian Heat is able to jump off the top rope and nail James with a missile dropkick! The crowd cheers! COLE Missile Dropkick from Colombian Heat! Colombian Heat sits up...and looks at his right hand. "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COACH Oh no. Not this too! Colombian Heat stares at his right hand. He acts as though he's mesmerized by it. COLE The thousands in attendance here in Madison Square Garden are on their feet! COACH Gah! It's not even a wrestling move! Colombian Heat is in a trance. He starts shaking his head. His right hand starts shaking. Heat is acting like he's in a seizure. Finally, Heat lets out a giant, "WASSSUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPPP!?" and then does a Spinaroonie to a loud pop from the crowd! COLE Spinaroonie! Spinaroonie! Spinaroonie from Colombian Heat! COACH Oh! First the Broncobuster, and now this! Colombian Heat goes for the cover. 1...2...KICK OUT! COACH Of course, you idiot! You spend all that time doing the Spinaroonie and that's what ya get! Heat slaps the mat in frustration, but he continues on. Heat picks James Riggs up. Heat then rolls him up! 1... 2... KICK OUT!!!!!! COLE That wasn't it either! Staci is now biting her well manicured nails. Heat takes a little breather, but then gets up. He picks James Riggs up. Heat then whips James Riggs into the ropes. Heat follows that up with a leg lariat! Colombian Heat then follows *that* up by running forward, leaping onto the second rope, and springboarding off of it to do a moonsault onto James Riggs! COLE WESTSIIIIIIIDE Moonsault! The cover! ONE! TWO! KICK OUT!!! COACH No! No! No! No! No! He didn't get it! He didn't get it! COLE But he was close though. COACH Close doesn't count, though! Not in wrestling! Staci holds up two fingers to symbolize that it was a two count. COLE Colombian Heat is trying to put James Riggs away, but Riggs will not give in just yet! COACH That's because he has the heart of a champion, Michael! And champions never say die! Riggs and Heat are very tired now. Riggs sits up, so Colombian Heat grabs him by the hair and gives him a backbreaker! Heat then exits the ring and climbs the top rope once again. COLE Heat going up one more time! Heat sets himself up on the top rope. He looks down at Riggs, looks at the fans, and then leaps off the top rope, coming down HARD on James Riggs with The Fatal Mistake (Lo' Down a.k.a. D'Lo Brown's version of the Frog Splash)! COLE The Fatal Mistake! Could this be it? Heat is already covering Riggs. 1... 2.... 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!! KICK OUT!!! The crowd thought that was the finish. But it wasn't. Now Colombian Heat is pissed off at Nick Patrick, and lets him know that fact by standing up and getting in his face. But the Senior Referee maintains that it was a two count and that's that. COACH Look at that thug! Harassing that poor referee! COLE James Riggs did the same thing earlier! COACH He didn't get all up in his grill! COLE He PIEFACED the guy! COACH Do you know the type of person Colombian Heat is? He could be carrying a switchblade for all we know! COLE Colombian Heat should focus on the match if he wants to keep his 24/7 Title! COACH Well in that case, keep on harassing old what's-his-face over there! The crowd boos thinking that was the finish. Colombian Heat continues arguing with the referee. Staci taunts Heat by holding two fingers up in the air. While Heat argues with Nick Patrick, James Riggs is busy getting up. Once he's at a vertical base, JR rushes towards Colombian Heat, shoves him into the ropes, and uses the momentum to roll him up! 1... 2.... KICK OUT!!! The kick out sends James Riggs through the second and third ropes onto the floor! COLE James Riggs is out! COACH Oh no! Colombian Heat exits the ring himself and picks James Riggs up. He punches Riggs in the face. Then, he grabs Riggs by his left arm and whips him into a ring post! Riggs goes flying out from the ring post onto the floor! COACH Disqualify him! Disqualify him! COLE But if he's disqualified, then James Riggs doesn't win the Title! COACH Nevermind! Nevermind! Staci screams for her man, who lands right next to her. COLE Both guys are showing the signs of this long match now! COACH Why is Colombian Heat in such a hurry to get outside the ring anyway? If James Riggs gets counted out, he keeps the Title! COLE Because Colombian Heat, unlike some people, doesn't want to take the easy way out! COACH Who do you mean by 'some people'? COLE You know who I mean! COACH Oh will you stop!? Staci checks on Riggs, but backs off as soon as Colombian Heat appears. Heat grabs Riggs by his hair and throws him back into the ring, stopping Nick Patrick's count at 6. Heat follows JR back into the ring. Colombian Heat is breathing hard, but James Riggs is slowly getting up. Once he's up, Riggs rests on the top ring rope...that is until Colombian Heat kicks his leg out from under his leg! (R.I.P. Owen Hart) COACH Now come on! What was that for!? COLE It's not illegal to do that, Coach! COACH Well, it should be! The crowd cheers. JR gets right back up, now clutching his left knee in pain. This causes him to collapse onto the mat. However, Riggs gets up, and walks with a limp...until Colombian Heat kicks his leg out from under him again! COACH See! He did it again! Referee, stop him! Nick Patrick does admonish Heat for the kicks. Heat ignores the ref's orders though. Riggs is on the mat, using the ring ropes to pull himself back up. Suddenly, Staci appears on the ring apron! COLE Oh look at this! Staci is on the ring apron! COACH Yes! Do your thing, Staci! Colombian Heat turns his attention to James Riggs' wife and manager. Heat has a smile on his face as he walks on up to her. COACH You get away from her, mister! Staci yells at Colombian Heat. Heat just laughs off the yelling. COLE Uh-oh. Things could get ugly here. The crowd is buzzing in anticipation of what Heat's going to do. Staci continues yelling, with Heat just smiling. Finally, Staci SLAPS Colombian Heat--NO! Colombian Heat blocks the slap...and plants a big wet kiss on her lips! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COACH What!? What!? What!? COLE Whoa! Colombian Heat is kissing James Riggs' wife! He is kissing Staci! COACH HE'S PUTTING HIS HANDS ON ANOTHER MAN'S WIFE! OR SHOULD I SAY, HIS LIPS ON ANOTHER MAN'S WIFE! Colombian Heat continues kissing Staci. Staci tries to fight off the kiss, but is unable to escape Heat's grasp! COACH Get your filthy hands off her, Heat! COLE Hey, it doesn't say it's illegal to kiss someone in a match! COACH SHUT UP MICHAEL COLE, YOU'RE NOT HELPING! Finally, Heat stops kissing Staci. Staci looks HORRIFIED. Meanwhile, Colombian Heat is all smiles. He tells Staci, "I's hope youse enjoyed dat as much as I did!" This causes Staci to jump off the ring apron and spit out in disgust! She makes vomiting sounds on the outside as Colombian Heat looks on. Heat wipes his mouth and smiles a wide smile to the crowd's delight. COACH James Riggs is never going to want to kiss Staci ever again! COLE I think it would be an honor to be kissed by Colombian Heat! COACH God, you are so gay. Colombian Heat plays to the crowd...until James Riggs attacks Colombian Heat from behind! Staci is still gagging on the outside. Riggs stomps on Colombian Heat repeatedly as the crowd boos! COLE And James Riggs has come back in this match! COACH Yes! Yes! That'll teach you to mess with another man's wife! Riggs stomps Colombian Heat again and again on the mat. Riggs picks Colombian Heat up. JR gives the dazed and confused Colombian an Irish Whip into the ropes. He follows that up with a SPEAR~! COLE Spear! Spear! Spear on Colombian Heat by James Riggs! COACH Just like he did at The Aloha Stadium two weeks ago! COLE That's right! Colombian Heat has experienced that move before! Riggs gets right back up and taunts Colombian Heat. He yells at Heat about kissing Staci, and then yells out to the crowd, "HE'S FINISHED!" "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" JR heads to a turnbuckle corner and waits for Heat to get up. Heat has rolled over near the ropes. COLE And it looks like James Riggs is going for the finish here! He's going to go for the Rolling Koppou Kick! COACH Yes! Here we go! The crowning of a new 24/7 Champion is about to take place! COLE Colombian Heat could be in danger of losing his 24/7 Title right now! Riggs eyes Heat intensely from the turnbuckle corner. The crowd is booing loudly. Staci is still gagging. Colombian Heat is using the middle rope to pull himself up. COACH Get ready JR Nation! Your man is about to add his first OAOAST title to his collection! COLE Colombian Heat has no idea what is coming for him! He has gone down to this move before, and he might be going down to it again! COACH First on OAOAST Syndicated, then on HeldDOWN~!, and now tonight at AngleSlam! COLE James Riggs is stalking his prey. He is ready to put the finishing touches on this match! Riggs is motioning for Heat to get up. Colombian Heat is on his knees. He is using the second rope to pull himself to his left knee. The crowd gets louder in their booing. Riggs cracks an evil smile. Staci is watching, and she too cracks an evil smile. COLE Colombian Heat is in a bad way here! The momentum James Riggs has had since July could carry on here tonight to a 24/7 Title victory! COACH Finally! Colombian Heat's first 24/7 Title defense will be his LAST 24/7 Title defense! Yes! Colombian Heat uses the top ring rope to pull himself up to his feet. Riggs is getting antsy waiting for Colombian Heat to get to his feet. He is practically foaming at the mouth by now. Staci nods her head with an evil smile on her pretty face. The crowd boos. Colombian Heat uses the referee's shirt to keep him balanced. COACH This is it! This is it! This is it right here! It's over! It's all over! COLE Colombian Heat better watch out! He could lose his Title right here! Suddenly, the crowd comes alive! Because SPANISH FLY is running down the aisle with a steel chair in his right hand! COLE Hey! Wait a minute! COACH What's that little pipsqueak doing here!? The now maskless Spanish Fly, wearing a white hoodie with SPANISH FLY written on the front in black "gangsta" letters, white sweat pants with 619 written vertically down the left leg in black "gangsta" style, and white wrestling boots, hops onto the ring apron and swings his steel chair, hitting James Riggs in the back with it! COACH WHAT!? COLE THAT'S for taking his mask away! COACH He can't do that! That little bastard can't do that! COLE Well, he just did, Coach! COACH DAMNIT! SOMEBODY STOP HIM! The crowd is going nuts! Nick Patrick didn't see the chairshot since Heat was holding onto the referee's shirt! Spanish Fly stays at ringside, but throws the steel chair aside. James Riggs stumbles out from the turnbuckle in pain. Colombian Heat grabs him and hooks him up. The crowd cheers louder. Colombian Heat scoops James Riggs up, and lifts Riggs up high into the air! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE He's got him up! He's got him up! COACH No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! COLE Could it be!? Could it be!? COACH NO! Colombian Heat has James Riggs up right where he wants him. Heat looks at Riggs, looks at the mat, looks at the crowd, and then smiles. Spanish Fly is nodding his head, while Staci is shaking hers. Colombian Heat drops down to the mat, giving James Riggs the COLOMBIAN NECKTIE~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111 COLE Colombian Necktie! Colombian Necktie on James Riggs! COACH No! COLE Could Heat have him!? COACH No! Colombian Heat covers James Riggs, hooking his left leg. Riggs is knocked out! Spanish Fly is ready to jump up and down, while Staci is near tears. Referee Nick Patrick makes the count with the crowd counting along. 1... 2... 2 1/2 2.999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *DING DING DING* (19:32) [b]"YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"[/b] COLE Heat retains the Title! Heat retains the 24/7 Title! Colombian Heat lets out a mighty yell as "Gasolina (Remix)" by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil' Jon and Pitbull starts playing. Staci stands on the outside crestfallen, while Spanish Fly is jumping up and down in celebration. BUFFER Here is your winner...and STILL One And Only AngleSault Thread Twenty-Four/Seven Champion...COLOMBIANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT! Nick Patrick hands the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt to Colombian Heat. Heat clutches the belt with both hands and says thanks to God. Nick Patrick raises Heat's hands in victory. James Riggs lies on the mat in defeat. COLE A hard fought victory for Colombian Heat as we kick off AngleSlam here in Madison Square Garden! COACH Colombian Heat cheated to get this victory! COLE He did not! COACH Yes he did! Colombian Heat used Spanish Fly to gain the victory! Spanish Fly used that steel chair on James Riggs! James Riggs would be the 24/7 Champion right now if it weren't for Spanish Fly! COLE Colombian Heat had no idea Spanish Fly was going to come out here! COACH If he didn't, then why did he hold the referee's shirt doing the time Spanish Fly came out here!? COLE That was just a coincidence! COACH Coincidence my black ass! That was cheating, plain and simple! COLE I guess you can say it was cheating a little bit-- COACH A LITTLE BIT!? Colombian Heat is the 24/7 Champion right now because of a Spanish Fly CHAIRSHOT! A CHAIRSHOT! A FREAKING CHAIRSHOT! WHAT MORE EVIDENCE DO YOU NEED!? Colombian Heat is a thug! He's a low-life! He's a thug! And he doesn't DESERVE to wear the 24/7 Title! That belt belongs to James Riggs! James Riggs is the uncrowned Champion as far as I'm concerned! COLE Wow. You really are pissed aren't you? COACH YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I'M PISSED! Colombian Heat gets up and kisses the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt. Heat raises the belt with his left hand as "Gasolina (Remix)" continues playing. James Riggs rolls out of the ring and is checked on by Staci. COLE What a match we have just witnessed! What a way to start off AngleSlam 2007! COACH Yeah, it was a good match, just with a rotten ending! COLE You still upset? COACH OF COURSE I AM! This was to be James Riggs night! His first title reign in the OAOAST! But then that little pipsqueak, that freaking midget, a MIDGET ruined his night! Spanish Fly and Colombian Heat should be ashamed of themselves! COLE There's nothing you can do, Coach. The referee's decision is final. Colombian Heat is still the OAOAST 24/7 Champion! COACH And that just makes me sick! Colombian Heat does a SHIMMY~! to the crowd's delight. Spanish Fly slides into the ring with the steel chair in his left hand. Heat sees Fly, and sees the chair, and laughs it up, before embracing Spanish Fly in the middle of the ring. COLE Spanish Fly got some payback of his own for James Riggs taking his mask! COACH By using a steel chair! Isn't that against everything he supposedly stands for? The man's a hypocrite! He says one thing, and does something else! Kids look up to this guy! And he let them down! He let them all down! COLE Coach, let's not take it too far-- COACH I am taking it as far as I can go! This is a miscarriage of justice! James Riggs should be the 24/7 Champion right now! But that damn Spanish Fly butted in, and now we have to deal with *THIS* for another day! This world is unfair! COLE Well, who said life was fair? COACH This is a horrible scene! Colombian Heat puts his left arm around Spanish Fly's shoulders. Both men are smiling wide smiles. Heat raises the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt with his right hand. The crowd cheers loudly. Heat high fives his best friend, and then raises the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt over his head. He parades around the ring with the belt over his head, bobbing his head to the beat of his entrance song. James Riggs and Staci walk back to the entrance, crushed at James' defeat. Colombian Heat gets on a second turnbuckle and raises the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt with his right hand, while throwing up the "W" with his left hand. COLE Let's take a look at the replay. COACH Do we have to? COLE Yes. The OAOAST AngleSlam 2007 logo flashes across the screen. Cut to the ending of the Colombian Heat/James Riggs match. COACH Awww geeze. So, James Riggs had the victory. He had the match won. This was HIS match for the taking. He was going to win. When that little runt, that little midget. That shaved Ewok, that annoying bug, ran out, and BLASTED JR with a chair! And then Colombian Heat *just so happened* to be around to give JR the Colombian Necktie! He went for the cover. 1! 2! 3! Your winner, the CHEATER, Colombian HACK! COLE You're really not going to let this go, aren't you? COACH No I am not! Colombian Heat cheated to win the 24/7 Title, and he cheated again tonight to retain it! Colombian Heat does not deserve to be the 24/7 Champion! He DOES NOT DESERVE ANY TITLES IN THE OAOAST! COLE Colombian Heat is holding a title right now, Coach. COACH AND I HATE IT! Colombian Heat is off the turnbuckle and is still playing to the crowd along with Spanish Fly. Fly and Heat bob their heads to the beat of Colombian Heat's entrance song as the crowd continues cheering. Fly does a SHIMMY~! of his own. Heat and Fly high five again and embrace. COLE Well, the fact is, Colombian Heat, after a hard fought victory-- COACH HA! COLE has retained the OAOAST 24/7 Championship! We begin AngleSlam with one Champion retaining his Title. Is that an omen for the rest of the night? We'll find out as we're just getting started! Colombian Heat kicks off AngleSlam with a HUGE victory! Damn straight! COACH CHEATER! Colombian Heat gets on a second turnbuckle and raises the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt with his left hand, and throws up the "W" with his right hand. He smiles a wide smile while the crowd cheers and Spanish Fly applauds him. Colombian Heat yells out, "YEAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH BOOOOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" as "Gasolina (Remix)" by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil' Jon and Pitbull has to be restarted. [b]FADE OUT[/b]

It's pretty easy to tell where this one goes, huh? DRAMATIC MUSIC~! plays as a shot of the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt is shown. THE VOICE~! It is the dream of every professional wrestler to be the World Heavyweight Champion. Cut to a close-up of the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt. THE VOICE~! For many, becoming World Heavyweight Champion is the absolute pinnacle of their career. By becoming World Heavyweight Champion, their names are inevitably etched into the annals of time. Their careers, never to be forgotten. Their legacies, to live on forever. Another close-up of the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt is shown. THE VOICE~! It is an honor chased by many...but only achieved by few. The eyes of Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, Zack Malibu, and "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican are shown. PRL is, of course, doing the Corporate Eyebrow. THE VOICE~! Tonight, three men fight for the chance to be called World Heavyweight Champion. Three men struggle to reach the top of the mountain. Three men, fighting for one goal, but each one with a different motive. Cut to Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background, cocky as always. THE VOICE~! The first man is the Champion. Cut to Landon defeating Zack Malibu to win the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship on the June 28, 2007 edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. THE VOICE~! His Title victory shocked the world who had never thought that his time had come. Cut to a montage of Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt. THE VOICE~! Throughout this summer, he has enjoyed a successful reign as World Heavyweight Champion... Cut to Maddix beating "Urban Legend" Todd Cortez on the August 16, 2007 edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. THE VOICE~! ...with only one Title defense made thus far. Cut to Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background. THE VOICE~! Tonight, he steps into the ring against two of the greatest OAOAST Superstars of all-time, inside the World's Most Famous Arena, where he looks to show the world that he is worthy of the honor and prestige that comes with being World Heavyweight Champion and to continue his iron grip on the Title. Landon laughs manically as we fade out. Cut to Zack Malibu holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background. THE VOICE~! Then, there is the second man, the Former Champion. Cut to a montage of Zack Malibu clips from over the years. THE VOICE~! For the past five years, he has been the very face of the company he works for. With accolades a mile wide, this young, charismatic Superstar has done more before the age of 30 than most men have done their entire lives. Cut to Zack Malibu raising the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt during his first title reign. Cut to Zack Malibu raising the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt during his second title reign. Cut to Zack Malibu raising the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt during his third title reign. THE VOICE~! Already a three-time World Heavyweight Champion, his last Title reign was ended just as quickly as it began. Cut to Zack lying on the mat after Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix beat him for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship on the June 28, 2007 edition of OAOAST HeldDOWN~!. Cut to Zack Malibu holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background. THE VOICE~! Tonight, he looks to gain title number four, and one of the men he faces is the man who took the Title away from him. Tonight, he is a vengeful man, trying to regain what many believe is rightfully his. Tonight, he hopes to get what he momentarily savored, and abruptly lost in the hopes of restoring honor and prestige to the World Heavyweight Championship. Zack drops the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt and has a shocked expression on his face, to symbolize how quickly his third Title reign ended. We see the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt fall as we fade out. Cut to "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background. THE VOICE~! And then, there is the third man. The Man Who Has Never Been Champion. Cut to a montage of PRL highlights. THE VOICE~! Throughout his illustrious career, he has held many titles, and achieved many goals. But the one thing missing from his already impressive resume is a World Heavyweight Championship reign. Cut to PRL's World Title matches in the past. The Unlucky 7 Elimination Chamber from Deadly Game: Unlucky 7. The match against Stephen Joseph Popick from November Reign 2005. The match against "Reckless" Drek Stone from World Without End 2006. THE VOICE~! He has come close to achieving this goal in the past, but so far, has yet to finish what he has started. Cut to "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background. THE VOICE~! Tonight, he looks to add that one final accomplishment to his career. To finish the story that was started 10 years ago. He is confident, cocky, and ready for battle. He has no fear and has nothing to lose. Tonight, he looks to gain what his two opponents have already had. Tonight, he hopes he'll finally have the opportunity to win it all. Tonight, he hopes to put his name in the record books as yet another man to feel the honor and prestige of being World Heavyweight Champion. PRL smiles an evil smile as we fade out. Cut to Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background. THE VOICE~! The Champion. Cut to Zack Malibu holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background. THE VOICE~! The Former Champion. Cut to "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background. THE VOICE~! The Man Who Has Never Been Champion. Cut to clips of Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, Zack Malibu, and "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican posing in front of the black background, each man holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt. THE VOICE~! Three men. Three different motivations. But all have one goal. As yet another summer winds down and we head into the fall, three men will do battle in front of a sold out crowd and millions watching around the world. Tonight, three warriors of the ring will square off in the World's Most Famous Arena in the World's Greatest City. Tonight, three men will all be vying for what only one can have. Three men, with varying motivations, yet all sharing a common goal. Cut to Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, Zack Malibu, and "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican all celebrating after victories. THE VOICE~! Tonight, only one man will emerge triumphant... Cut to Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, Zack Malibu, and "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican all in horrible pain. THE VOICE~! ...while two men will both share the agony of defeat. Cut to another shot of Landon Maddix holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in front of a black background, followed by Zack Malibu, followed by Tha Puerto Rican. THE VOICE~! It is the biggest main event in AngleSlam history... Cut to a shot of the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt. THE VOICE~! ...and it is being fought all for the honor and prestige that comes with being the World Heavyweight Champion. [b]FADE OUT[/b]

I agree with KC.

-I call opening segment! -James Riggs promo -Colombian Heat segment -Colombian Heat segment

I want to write an opening video package this year, so let me do that, please. And I call Heat/Riggs for opening match.

The Colombian Heat Rap Concert and all other segments pertaining to said Rap Concert have been edited into the show for your enjoyment. So...uh...enjoy. Oh, and 100% credit for Colombian Heat's rap song goes out to my main homie, Jeremy "G~mile" Greene, who actually took the time out of his life in order to write me an original rap song to use for our silly little e-fed, so for that he should be given props. Check out more of his music at http://www.soundclick.com/dainfamousgreenemile and http://www.myspace.com/foxyredux.

-The Colombian Heat Rap Concert! Colombian Heat makes his live performance debut on HeldDOWN~! -Expect segments throughout the night as Colombian Heat prepares for his live performance

So, we're using the WWE WrestleMania XX: Where It All Begins...Again entrance set instead of the MSG short entrance?

ANGLESAULT Our next speaker is no stranger to the microphone. In fact, you can say he's something of a motor mouth. But at AngleSlam, he's going to need his talent in the ring, not on the mic, to beat not one, but TWO men and become the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion for the first time in his career. The crowd starts booing, since they know who this person is. ANGLESAULT (CONT'D) So, please join me in welcoming, the longest reigning 24/7 Champion in OAOAST history, he is the leader of The Lightning Crew, and he says he's the most electrifying man in all of professional wrestling. He is the Man With The Golden Contract, which he will cash in at AngleSlam. He is "The Corporate Champion" THA PUERTOOOO RICCCCAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! *THE CHAMP IS HERE!* "Know Your Role '99" begins playing over the speakers. The crowd boos loudly. "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican stands up and walks on over to the podium, holding his black spray-painted briefcase with his Golden Contract inside. PR is wearing his standard Corporate attire of a white collar shirt, red tie, black sports jacket, Puerto Rican flag bandana on his head, an earring in his left ear, sunglasses, a $500 Rolex watch on his right wrist, his engagement ring on his right ring finger, black dress pants, and black dress shoes. PRL shakes AngleSault's right hand, and then glances over at Zack Malibu and Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix. "P.R. SUCKS!" "P.R. SUCKS!" "P.R. SUCKS!" "P.R. SUCKS!" PRL is now at the podium prepared to speak. But he's interrupted by the "P.R. SUCKS!" chant. PRL uses this opportunity to "smell the electricity". The chant gets louder. The Corporate Champ chuckles. "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION" THA PUERTO RICAN FINALLY...Tha Puerto Rican...WILL BECOME WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" THA PUERTO RICAN The countdown is on! Three weeks and counting! Three more weeks until my date with destiny! Sunday night. August the 26th. 2007. Madison Square Garden in New York City. The site where YOUR CORPORATE Champion finally...FINALLY takes his rightful place on the OAOAST throne. The site where Tha Puerto Rican will join the legends in immortality! The site where Tha Puerto Rican, come hell or high water, will defeat not one, but TWO...jabronies... "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" PRL And will finally get the chance to wear the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship. The crowd boos again. Landon is mockingly applauding PRL. Zack Malibu is just rolling his eyes. PRL And you see, this ain't gonna be no ordinary match. Oh no. This is going to be the greatest Triple Threat Match of all-time! Better than any Triple Threat Match you have ever seen! You've got The Corporate One on one side. You've got The Franchise on the other side. And then you got the World Heavyweight Champion himself on ANOTHER side. And the three of us will duke it out. Oh yes. You better believe we will collide. Because I know that Zack's gonna bring his 'A' game in our match. And I know that our Champion, whatshisface, will bring it-- LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" MADDIX Landon! My name is Landon Maddix! LAN-DON MAD-DIX! Remember that name, Puerto! You're going to be hearing it alot more from now on! Without missing a beat, PRL continues. THA PUERTO RICAN And we will give you fans a match of a lifetime! But let me tell you something, Lightning Bolts. There's only one way--AND THA PUERTO RICAN MEANS ONE-- CROWD WAY! Tha Puerto Rican looks annoyed at the crowd finishing his catchphrase (Cough). PRL ...Don't do that. Anyway, as I was saying, there is only one way--AND THA PUERTO RICAN MEANS ONE WAY--this match will end. And that is with Tha Puerto Rican, with Stephen Joseph Popick AND my fiancee Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez by my side, raising the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt over my head with my music playing and confetti falling from the rafters in front of the sold out crowd at Madison Square Garden! LOUD boos for that remark, although there are some cheers mixed in there. PRL looks at the crowd with a satisfied grin on his face. "P.R. SUCKS!" "P.R. SUCKS!" PRL And so, on August 26th, I will cash *this* in (points to his black spray-painted briefcase). And some would say it's about time. And you know what? I actually agree with them. IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME! And in this match, I have the chance to pin either Zack Malibu-- "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" PRL Or...Landon. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO/YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" PRL And I think the question on everybody's mind is, just who will I pin or make submit to win the World Title? Zack Malibu or Landon Maddix? Now, Zack-- PRL turns his attention to Zack Malibu. He has his clear undivided attention. PRL We've had our run-ins in the past. We've gotten down and dirty several times. In Lethal Rumbles, Elimination Chambers, and whatnot. But this is the very first time that I am facing you on a pay-per-view. And in the main event, no less! And, even though I don't really give a damn who I beat to win the match...I gotta say, there's a part of me that's hoping, PRAYING, that it is you I beat to become the World Heavyweight Champion! I mean, how great would that be? The Corporate Champ defeating Zack Malibu, the Franchise of the OAOAST, to win his first World Title! How appropriate would that be? Huh? Do you agree? LOUD boos for that comment. Zack just stares at PRL, his expression as serious as ever. PRL chuckles while looking at Malibu. THA PUERTO RICAN Oh, I am SOOO looking forward to being in the same ring as you, Zack, on the 26th. Finally, Tha Puerto Rican and Zack Malibu will collide in an OAOAST ring. This will be something people will tell their grandkids about in the future. The day they saw Tha Puerto Rican layeth the smacketh down on the single greatest OAOAST Superstar of all-time! That's going to be something! BUT, there is also another person in this match. Landon Maddix. PRL turns his attention to Landon. Landon sneers at Tha Puerto Rican. He holds up the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt. PRL That belt's been away from me for far too long. Four years is a very long time in the wrestling world. But it's okay. I can wait a little while longer. Because I know that in three weeks, that belt's coming home with me! Oh yes. That belt will be coming home, will be coming home to the place that it belongs! And Landon, you can whine, you can cry, you can complain, you can bitch all you want. None of that is going to stop me from putting my size 10 boot up your ass at AngleSlam if I have to! "YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Surprisingly, the crowd pops for that remark. Landon acts appalled that PRL would say such a thing. PRL Landon, there's also a part of me that's REALLY looking forward to ripping that long hair from your head. You have managed to annoy Tha Puerto Rican just by being in this building! And that's no easy feat. If it is you I beat at AngleSlam to win the World Heavyweight Title, then my victory just might be just a *little* bit sweeter! The crowd responds to that with a mixture of boos and cheers. PRL You're not going to be able to hide behind your skank at Madison Square Garden, Landon. I've got you in my scope, and at AngleSlam, I WILL be laying the smackdown on your candy ass! The crowd actually cheers that too! PRL The image of you throwing a tantrum while I celebrate my victory fills me with joy inside. And I hope--no--I KNOW that's exactly what will happen in three weeks at AngleSlam! Because, you, my friend, are going to go down faster than your girl goes down on the bum across the street! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Landon gets up and makes his way towards the podium, but is held back by AngleSault and Theodore Moneymaker! PRL laughs manically at the comment he just made. The crowd responds with a "P.R.!" chant! Landon raises the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in the air, taunting Tha Puerto Rican, but P.R. just laughs. AngleSault and Moneymaker are still holding Landon back. THA PUERTO RICAN Oh lord. You're too easy. Too easy! Anyway, I'm ready for AngleSlam! My question is Zack: are you ready? And Landon: are you ready? Well, Landon, I doubt you're ready. But if you really are, then the two of you better JUST BRING IT! Because AngleSlam will be a night the both of you will never EVER forget! And that's the truth, Ruth! THE CHAMP HAS-- CROWD SPO-KUN~! PRL is annoyed at the crowd once again. THA PUERTO RICAN This is not sing-along with the Champ. Tha Puerto Rican does it by himself. PRL removes the microphone from the podium. He tilts his head back, takes a deep breath-- THA PUERTO RICAN THE CHAMP HAS SPO-KUN~! PRL puts the microphone back on the podium. The crowd responds with a mixture of boos and cheers for the P.R. Menace. PRL raises his black spray-painted briefcase over his head. He points to it and says, "Three weeks!" Puerto Rican then walks away from the podium and back to his seat. AngleSault and Theodore Moneymaker have managed to calm Landon Maddix down. A "P.R.!" chant starts, but is quickly drowned out with a "P.R. SUCKS!" chant. "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican just laughs manically while he gets himself a glass of water.

Oh I don't know about that. -Spanish Fly segment. Why you ask? Because of this. Play along:

-TRIPLE THREAT MATCH FOR THE OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix (Champion with Megan Skye) vs. Zack Malibu (Challenger) vs. "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican (Challenger with Stephen Joseph Popick and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez) -OAOAST 24/7 CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Colombian Heat (Champion) vs. James Riggs (Challenger with Staci)

Well, this show was certainly bigger than the last OAOAST Syndicated, so that's good. Made it feel more like a big event in a way. I read all the matches while I was posting the show, and they were all great. The Bra And Panties Tag Team Match read like a romance novel in some parts. Patty put alot of effort into that match, I could tell. Did I miss anything? If I did, then you guys can just edit it in, since pretty much everyone who's in the OAOAST is also a mod in the OAOAST! I'd give more feedback, but I haven't slept in over 24 hours, so I'm gonna go beddy bye now. This show sure did take much longer to post than I thought it would. Onwards and upwards to AngleSlam everybody! Good night. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

The pop Sting got when he nailed Hogan at Uncensored 1997 was amazing. I still love the Hogan/Sting feud sans Starrcade 1997. If it weren't for the ending, it'd probably be my favorite feud ever.

PRODUCED BY OAOAST Entertainment EXECUTIVE PRODUCER Zack Malibu DIRECTED BY Ed Wood Caulfield OAOAST CREATED BY cobainwasmurdered Tony149 Anglesault WRITTEN BY Ed Wood Caulfield King Cucaracha Tony149 Alfdogg Patty O'Green Zack Malibu © 2007 OAOAST Entertainment All Rights Reserved

TV-14 L,V * DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA * Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid shock and delight. THE OAOAST...WHAT THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD IS READING~! We fade in on a beach in California. People are shown having a good time. Tropical music plays. NOT VINCE McMAHON, BUT A VERY CLOSE SOUNDALIKE IT'S SUMMERTIME! WHICH MEANS FUN AT THE BEACH! Cut to three buxom blondes walking down the beach wearing bikinis. NOT-VINCE BEAUTIFUL BABES WEARING VERY LITTLE CLOTHING! Cut to a what is presumbly a shot of a bunch of college kids getting drunk during Spring Break, but for the sake of this segment, we'll pretend it's summer. NOT-VINCE AND MEMORIES THAT'LL LAST A LIFETIME! Cut to a shot of Big Ben. A majestic royal horn plays. We then return to the tropical music. NOT-VINCE TONIGHT, THE OAOAST TRAVELS TO LONDON, ENGLAND... Cut to Colombian Heat walking down the entrance ramp. NOT-VINCE WHERE YOU'LL SEE FUN AT THE BEACH! (Not really.) Cut to shots of Chicks Over Dicks and Mackenzie DeCenzo and Jade Rodez walking down the entrance ramp. NOT-VINCE BEAUTIFUL BABES WEARING VERY LITTLE CLOTHING! Cut to Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, Zack Malibu, and "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican getting into a three-way yelling contest. NOT-VINCE AND MEMORIES THAT WILL LAST A LIFETIME! Cut to another shot of London, England. NOT-VINCE THE SUMMER'S JUST HEATING UP HERE IN THE ONE AND ONLY ANGLESAULT THREAD! IT'S TIME FOR ANOTHER EXCITING SATURDAY NIGHT EDITION OF OAOAST SYNDICATED! "ACROSS THE COUNTRY AND AROUND THE WORLD..." The OAOAST Syndicated theme song starts playing (have we settled on what it is yet, guys?). The OAOAST Syndicated logo fades away, replaced with a shot of the hyped up crowd at the O2 Arena in London, England. The camera does a wide pan of the sold out crowd inside the recently opened arena. Loyal British OAOAST fans are in attendance, holding up their handmade signs, mugging for the camera, and generally going wild as they are thrill to be having One And Only AngleSault Thread action in their own backyard. The set is the same as always: an AngleTron sitting on top of scaffolding, with only some curtains used for the wrestlers to enter through. However, since we're in England, there's also a little twist: two gigantic United Kingdom flags hang on both sides of the entrance. The following words appear on the top left hand corner of the screen: LONDON, ENGLAND TONY SCHIAVONE (Off-Screen) The OAOAST takes a trip across the pond as we continue the countdown to our annual summertime spectacular, AngleSlam! Welcome to another Saturday night edition of OAOAST Syndicated! SWOOP~ on down to our hosts for this evening, standing on top of the world famous OAOAST INTERVIEW STAGE~! More cheering fans are behind them. The OAOAST Syndicated theme song (whatever it is) dies down. TONY SCHIAVONE Hello everybody, I'm Tony Schiavone, and with me as always is the legendary Hall of Famer, former Governor of Minnesota, Jesse "The Body" Ventura! And fans, do not touch that dial AT ALL over the course of this program, because we have got one HELL of a show for you tonight! Isn't that right, Jess? JESSE "THE BODY" VENTURA I'll tell ya what, Tony Schiavone! AngleSlam may be a month away, but we have got a card tonight that could conceiveably BE the AngleSlam card too! It's like we're being blessed with TWO AngleSlams in one year! SCHIAVONE It certainly feels that way, Jess. We always have something special planned for these primetime Syndicateds, and this one is no different. 5 excellent matches are planned for you tonight, including our main event, a "Dream Partner Tag Team Match". The three men who will collide for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title at AngleSlam will be in action later on tonight as the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion, Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, teams up with his AngleSlam opponent, "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican, to take on the other man in the AngleSlam main event, Zack Malibu, and a partner of his choosing! And Jess, the lockerroom is abuzzed with just who Zack Malibu will pick for this GIGANTIC main event! VENTURA Zack has had some great partners in the past. Caboose, Leon Rodez, Evenflow, The Superstar. There's alot of hype as to who he picked to help him take on Tha Puerto Rican and Landon Maddix, two guys who personally can't stand each other, but who are teaming up in the hopes of making the Triple Threat Match at AngleSlam into an one-on-one encounter! SCHIAVONE It's all about Divide And Conquer in our main event. PRL and Maddix have agreed to put aside their differences in order to remove Zack Malibu from AngleSlam! But can they do it? Can they actually put Zack Malibu on the shelf and make him miss the 2007 AngleSlam? VENTURA Well, you never know, but if the Bruce Blank feud taught us anything about Zack Malibu, it's that as long as there's a breath in his body, he will fight! SCHIAVONE And that's a lesson Landon Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican need to take very seriously if they want to leave AngleSlam on August 26th the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion. Speaking of AngleSlam, it may be five weeks away, but the card is already shaping up to be the biggest AngleSlam EVER! And two more matches may be added to that card tonight! Colombian Heat, the new OAOAST 24/7 Champion, will take on James Riggs in a non-title contest. However, if James Riggs wins, then he gets a 24/7 Title shot against Colombian Heat at AngleSlam. And we've also got the 16-man Battlebowl Battle Royal with the winner to meet Alfdogg for the WDW World Heavyweight Championship at AngleSlam on August 26th! VENTURA The WDW has folded, but the OAOAST has accepted all the wrestlers and the belts with open arms. And now tonight, 16 wrestlers from the OAOAST and WDW will duke it out in the squared circle, with the winner to meet a future OAOAST Hall of Famer in Alfdogg at AngleSlam from Madison Square Garden in New York City! Talk about a golden opprotunity right there! SCHIAVONE Indeed it is, Jess. Battlebowl qualifying matches were held all month long, and the Sweet 16 will rumble in the ring later on tonight! Just look at some of the names involved: "After Hours" Felix Strutter, Thunderkid, both members of Team Heyross, Jumbo, "Sensational" Chris Stevens, MISTER WARRIOR! VENTURA How did MISTER WARRIOR get involved in this!? SCHIAVONE He has his ways, Jess. He's not like us mere mortals! VENTURA SCHIAVONE ...Moving on. In addition to the matches just mentioned, we've also got TWO title matches scheduled for tonight, including one with a very unique stipulation. The OAOAST Six-Man Tag Team Championship will be on the line as the Champions, The Beverly Hills Blonds and Christopher Patrick Allen, CPA, take on the team of D*LUX and "Silky Smooth" Leon Rodez! And then, are you ready for this one, Jess? VENTURA Oh yeah! I most certainly am, Tony Schiavone! SCHIAVONE Chicks Over Dicks will take on the team of Mackenzie DeCenzo and Jade Rodez in a Tag Team Bra And Panties Match for what is, at least currently, the OAOAST World Tag Team Titles! First time in OAOAST history that the Tag Team Titles will be defended in this type of a match-up, Jess. VENTURA Thank God all the participants involved are women! I am most looking forward to this one, Schiavone! Four of the most beautiful women on TV are going to be clawing at each other, trying to rip each others clothes off, all for the tag team gold! It combines two of my favorite things: hot women and tag team wrestling! What gods did I please? SCHIAVONE Theodore Moneymaker hopes this match will be the last stand of Chicks Over Dicks. VENTURA In this type of match-up, it's a level playing field. You don't really have to rely on any wrestling skills. All you have to do is, well, strip your opponents down to their bra and panties. Jade was worried going into this match, but all she has to do is make sure Alix and Krista are in their underwear at the end of this match, and she and Mackenzie AT LEAST have a shirt or pants or skirt on. I'm secretly hoping that we have a little 'wardrobe malfunction' with all four of the ladies, if you know what I mean. SCHIAVONE I'm sure red blooded heterosexual males all over the world will stay up late just to watch that match! Skin To Win is the name of the game. This will certainly go down as an OAOAST Syndicated for the ages! THREE matches that you will only see here tonight on OAOAST Syndicated, TWO title matches, ONE HELL of a show from the just recently opened O2 Arena in Jolly ol' London, England! Now, let's go to the ring for our opening match on the July 2007 edition of OAOAST Syndicated! Michael Buffer, take it away! *DING DING DING*

One And Only World Tag Team Title Scramble Cage Match Profile Brought to you by The Hills - The Complete Second Season on DVD Name: D*LUX Members: Tremendous Tyler & Showtime Shayne From: Detroit, MI Finisher: As Seen On 60 Minutes Career Highlights: Three time HI-YAH Champions. Former American Idol Contestants. Japanese branch of fan club is over ninety thousand members strong. COLE And after that last match, we know for sure that the Scramble Cage Match WILL indeed take place this Thursday on HeldDOWN~! to crown the first ever One And Only World Tag Team Champions! COACH That was such a great match. I'm so glad I Tivo'd it, so I can watch it again and again. COLE Did you make sure to wash your hands after you went to the bathroom? Because I don't want to feel anything sticky coming from you. COACH Yeah. Don't worry about me. It's Ventura you gotta be worried about. Dude's just unsanitory. Eeuch. COLE Anyway fans, what a night this has been so far! And we've still got one more match! PLUS, on the horizon, the biggest event of the summer, AngleSlam! Sunday, August 26th live only on pay-per-view from Madison Square Garden in New York City. And AngleSlam 2007 will be headlined by one of the biggest main events in OAOAST history. A Triple Threat Match for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title. The Champion, Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix defends the Title against the former Champion, Zack Malibu, AND the guy who has never won the Title, but has come close on several occasions, "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican. It's going to be one for the ages folks. Be sure you DO NOT miss it! And speaking of AngleSlam, coming up next--wait. Hold on...I've being told, we have to go backstage. We have to go backstage. Something is happening backstage! COACH What? What? Tell me! COLE Okay...I am told we have cameras backstage...we're going backstage now! The camera cuts to the backstage area where, limping through the hallways, Jamie O'Hara looks pretty dejected over his loss in the battle royal earlier. Kicking the ground, O'Hara curses to himself, still going over the mistakes in his head. In mid-curse though he's sent flying as suddenly NATHANIEL BLACK charges into view and wipes him out!! SCHIAVONE Hey... what the hell!? VENTURA He said he was gonna kick 'arse' and he didn't waste much time! Black stomps away on O'Hara, beating him down until any fight left after the battle royal seems to disappear. He then hauls O'Hara up by the wifebeater, grabbing him by the wrist and pulling him into a STIFF Clothesline! The back of O'Hara's head hits the floor HARD and he doesn't move a muscle there after. Besides a couple of groggy groans O'Hara is lifeless, as Black kneels down next to him. BLACK Now that was long overdue. Giving O'Hara a firm slap across the back of the head, Black marches off, leaving The Birmingham Bad Boy laying on the cold, hard floor. SCHIAVONE I tell you, I can't believe that! VENTURA Those two had hostility back in World Domination Wrestling. I guess there was some unfinished business that needed to be addressed. SCHIAVONE Unfinished business? Jesse, that was an unprovoked sneak attack, is what it was! VENTURA So? SCHIAVONE ...oh boy. (Cut back to Sofa Central.) COLE What the hell was that all about!? COACH Bout time somebody shut that loud mouth up! COLE Oh will you stop! Anyway fans, there's something brewing between Jamie O'Hara and Nathaniel Black! Who knows what's going to happen next! But right now, it's time for our main event. With AngleSlam just four weeks away, we will see the three participants in the triple threat, World Title main-event in action here. The sure to be awkward pairing of Landon Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican teaming up in an attempt to take out their third rival, Zack Malibu, plus a 'Dream Partner' of his choosing. COACH Do we have any idea who it is yet? COLE Not yet. I assume we'll know just as soon as PRL and Landon do. COACH That hardly seems fair. I mean, unless Zack's having trouble finding a partner which is entirely possible, why shouldn't he be made to name him in time for PR and Landon to prepare? COLE It's a little thing called 'intrigue' Coach. Sells tickets. COACH We come here like what, once a millenium? We coulda sold this place out with Biff Atlas in the main-event. Thankfully, it's at this point that the lights go down in the arena. The crowd know what's coming and already begin to whistle and cat-call, as Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them: *THE CHAMP IS HERE!* With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and "Know Your Role '99" begins playing, with the crowd standing up and booing. The entrance doors slide open and out come "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican, his girlfriend and Women's Champion Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and his manager and "Career Consultant" Stephen Joseph Popick! The crowd boos away as PRL holds his black briefcase spray-painted with L.C. in yellow high, which of course contains his Golden Contract inside. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, this is your Dream Partner tag team main-event, scheduled for one fall!! Introducing team number one. First, accompanied to the ring this evening by STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK and the OAOAST Women's Champion, MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ! He hails from San Juan, Puerto Rico. Weighing two hundred, twenty pounds... he is, THE PUUUEEEEEEERRRRRRTTOOOOOOOOO... RRRRIIIIIIIIIICCAAAAAAAAAANN!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" PRL looks at the crowd in disgust, jawing with one section as he climbs onto the ring apron. Popick holds the ropes open for his man and Tha Puerto Rican enters, spinning around and soaking in the fans' boos. PRL busts out the classic 'HBK muscle pose' as pyro goes off behind him, Popick displaying PR with pride like a prize on The Price Is Right. COLE PRL, getting as warm of a reception here in London, England as he does everywhere else in the world. COACH Except Puerto Rico of course. COLE Well, maybe. As PRL does his rounds of the turnbuckles, smelling the electricity on each side of the arena... "REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH!" ...he gets rudely interrupted! The lights dim, alternating between complete blackout and really frikkin' bright as "Personal Jesus" by Marilyn Manson hits. From behind the curtain steps Megan Skye, heralding the arrival of The World Champion, Landon Maddix, who stops at the top of the ramp and thrusts his hands out to his side to resounding boos. The lights stop alternating but stay dimmed as he walks to the ring, head held high as you'd expect from the Champ. BUFFER And, his tag team partner! Accompanied to the ring by MEGAN SKYE! Hailing from Huron, South Dakota by way of Madrid, Spain... weighing in at two hundred and eight pounds... he is the reigning OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion... LLLAAAAAANNDDOOOOONN... "LA CUCARACHA"... MMMMMAAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" With his 'partner' watching on with a displeased look on his face, Maddix makes sure all eyes are on him as he unstraps his World Title and places it over his right shoulder. Jogging up the ring steps, Landon then makes his entrance in similar fashion to PRL, spinning into centre stage as Megan holds the ropes for him. That alone creates some tension between Champion and soon-to-be-challenger, forcing Megan, Lindsay and Popick to step in and mediate. COLE No love lost between Landon and PRL. But they have a common goal tonight, to defeat and soften up Zack Malibu ahead of AngleSlam. Popick continues to ram that point home as Landon and PRL continue to glare daggers at each other. It's not until "Getting Away With Murder" hits and the crowd erupt on every side around them that they finally break their staredown and turn to the entrance way. BUFFER And the opponents! First, hailing from Providence, Rhode Island... weighing in at two hundred and ten pounds, he is the former three-time World Heavyweight Champion... "THE FRANCHISE"... ZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCKK... MMMMMMAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIBBUUUUUUUUUU!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Malibu enters the arena on his own, welcomed by the cheers of the crowd. As he heads down to the ring, Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican keep their eyes on the aisleway, waiting for Malibu's partner to appear and follow him to the ring. Surprisingly, no one follows, and Malibu hits the ringside area solo, circling around the ring while his foes dare him to step through the ropes. COACH You think he's got a partner, Cole? COLE It wouldn't surprise me to see Malibu try to take his two rivals on solo, but I have a feeling there's more than meets the eye here. Zack takes the mic from Michael Buffer, and then steps through the ropes, walking up to both his opponents and looking them in their eyes before stepping back and speaking. MALIBU I know what's on your mind, guys. I know that you and everyone else in here, wants to know who my partner is going to be tonight. You wanna know who has my back tonight? All in due time. COLE All in due time? Did he PICK a partner at all? Maddix shouts "We're waiting!" to Malibu, daring him to end the theatrics, but Zack continues on. MALIBU Give me a minute here, Landon. It'll be worth the wait, trust me. You see, as soon as this match got announced, I knew what I had to do. I knew exactly who to pick for this match, because it was the right thing to do. No, it's not any of The Hooligans, and it's not any of the Originals, so you can throw your obvious choices right out the window right now. Because there is someone deserving of a chance to prove himself in this company. A man who's been too wrapped up in issues that were no fault of his own. An endentured servant needing to be set free.. Suddenly, Maddix shoves PRL down, shouting at him, to the shock of everyone. PRL gets up, but Zack of all people steps between them, keeping them away from each other. MALIBU Hey...HEY! What's with the tension, guys? C'mon Maddix, you're jumping the gun...I didn't get one of the Lightning Crew lackeys to start a revolution... Maddix, now infuriated that Zack has made him look like a fool (and strike his partner), screams for Malibu to cut to the chase. MALIBU ...you really wanna know? Maddix and PRL, in unison, shout "YES!", before glaring at each other for having the same thoughts. MALIBU Then let me tell you who it is. It's someone that can be a breakout star in this company. Someone with all the talent needed to succeed, but with one fatal flaw. Loyalty. How is that a flaw? Because this guy has spent his career remaining loyal to the wrong people. People who use his talent for their own gain. People who keep him on their side simply because they know they can't afford to have him as an opponent. People, like a certain World Champion, who deep down knew all along that this day was coming. Malibu peers into the eyes of Landon Maddix, and Landon gulps, appearing to know what's coming. MALIBU Ladies and gentlemen, my partner tonight...the URBAN LEGEND, TODD CORTEZ! COLE WHAT!? Maddix, quickly, takes the mic out of Zack's hands before Todd's music can be hit, and starts screaming. MADDIX Wait a minute...WAIT A GOD DAMN MINUTE! Hehe. No way, there is NO WAY Todd is going to be your partner! No...Todd Cortez is MY friend, Malibu. He's MY partner. We came up through the SWF together, we came here and made your life a living HELL...what makes you think Todd Cortez owes YOU anything!? The crowd pops loudly as Cortez sprints down the aisle, sliding into the ring. CORTEZ Landon, BACK OFF. Again, the crowd pops, as Todd puts Landon in his place, and takes the mic from him. CORTEZ Malibu...you've got some balls on you, man. After all we've been through, all that went down last year between The Wildcards and you, and now you're gonna use ME as a part of your games? Zack, who has been given another mic by Michael Buffer in the midst of all this, responds. MALIBU Then look me in the eye and tell me you're happy about where you're at. Can you honestly say you're happy being stuck as the background to a guy that you don't even LIKE? I'm no fool, Todd. I know about everything that went down in the SWF. I know that you spent your time there honoring your old tag partner because you felt that his early retirement was partly your fault. How you wound up back by the side of this clown I'll never know, but your loyalty is doing you more harm than good, and you're blind to it. You think HE'S good for your career? You want to make something of yourself, and that's all you ever wanted. You want to make your family proud, you want to honor your brother, but THIS is not how to do it. Landon screams from behind Todd, telling Malibu to stop "making up lies", but Todd turns around and backs Landon up himself. CORTEZ So what, you're telling me I shouldn't be obligated to anyone, yet you're asking for my help? MALIBU I'm asking you to open your eyes. You don't owe me a damn thing, and honestly, we'll never be best friends...but neither will you two. You're gonna get run into the ground as his workhorse, doing all the dirty work so Maddix keeps the blood off his hands. Is THAT what you want? Don't you deserve better than that? Wasn't that always the plan, Todd? To make yourself better than the hand you were dealt? Cortez grows silent, thinking over Malibu's words, when Maddix steals the mic from him. MADDIX You... don't even TELL me you're listening to this crap! After all we've been through, you're going to listen to HIM? HIM!??! Cortez speaks down into the mic, and says all of two words. "He's right." The crowd goes nuts. Maddix fumes. MADDIX What did you just say? Cortez steals the mic from Landon, and inches closer to his "friend". CORTEZ I SAID he's RIGHT. For almost three years now, I've been living everyone else's life. I did everything for everyone else, because I'm not selfish. I don't ask for much, but the one thing I ask for is RESPECT, Landon. RESPECT is something that I got from Mike Van Siclen. RESPECT is something that I got from Alan Clark... and whether you like it or not, I just got more respect from a man I was forced to torture just one year ago, than I EVER got from you. Maddix looks like he's about to shit, while Malibu and PRL keep at bay. MADDIX Do you know what you're saying to me? You do this now, there's no going back. Not tomorrow, not a week from now, not EVER. CORTEZ That's the idea. Maddix's lip quivers as he tries to find the words to direct at his now former running buddy, while Cortez addresses Malibu. CORTEZ Let's clear the air though, Malibu. I do this, but after tonight, I don't owe you a damn thing. I respect you, but I don't owe you. Malibu nods in agreement and puts his hand out, and after a moment of hesitation, Todd Cortez accepts it to a HUGE pop... ...and then turns around JUST as Landon Maddix was going to clock him with the microphone! Landon freezes, dropping the microphone before he begins to plead his case. Cortez isn't having it, however, because if a handshake with Zack Malibu wasn't enough, flooring his former Martial Law partner with a right hand certainly gets the point across! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COACH What the hell is going on here!? Tha Puerto Rican tries to intervene, but Malibu cuts him off, staggering him with a flurry of right hands and then sends him over the ropes with a clothesline, while Landon quickly rolls out of the ring, away from Cortez! Megan rushes over to her man, looking as shocked as he does. COLE A shocking turn of events here tonight... Zack Malibu's dream partner is Landon Maddix's worst nightmare! Todd Cortez has broken free of the chains that bound him, and when we come back, Zack Malibu and Todd Cortez will take on Tha Puerto Rican and the World Heavyweight Champion! *COMMERCIAL BREAK!* COLE Welcome back to Syndicated, and if you're just joining us, you've missed out on a truly shocking turn of events. Todd Cortez was selected by Zack Malibu to be his partner against Landon Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican here tonight and accepted the role, breaking ties with the World Champion and becoming his own man! The in-ring action began during the break, as right now Malibu is trapped in the corner by Tha Puerto Rican, who cracks him in the chest with a pair of forearms before pulling him out. Malibu is sent to the far corner, but when PRL charges in, Zack tucks and rolls, avoiding the oncoming charge! Tha Puerto Rican turns around only to be hiptossed to the canvas by Malibu, and the fans rejoice at their hero taking charge. An Irish whip sends PRL to the ropes and back bodydropped on the rebound... but as Malibu comes up to a vertical base, he's nailed with a hard running kick from Maddix, who blind tagged himself in! COACH That's teamwork, baby! COLE You know, you're right, Coach. Tha Puerto Rican and Landon Maddix have the common goal of wanting to eliminate Zack Malibu before Angleslam, and with that motivation they can be a formidable team. Malibu picked Todd Cortez as his partner tonight, a man he held in contempt since early last year, and while Cortez has apparently seen the light so to speak, one has to wonder if he and Zack can work together, or if this could all be some grand ploy thought up by Maddix and/or Tha Puerto Rican! Maddix puts the boots to Zack, then stands over him and slaps him in the face, telling him in no uncertain terms to "respect your World Champion!" Maddix then goes over the corner and start pointing and shouting at Cortez, but when the Urban Legend makes a move to step into the ring, Maddix quickly backs off, not wanting to lock horns with his now former charge. COACH I tell ya, if it is a ploy, Cortez sure is doing a job of making it seem like he wants to tear Landon apart. Landon turns around and drills Zack with a right as he's getting up, then nails him with a European uppercut...but Zack fights back, nailing Maddix with a flurry of chops that blister his chest...until Landon jabs a thumb in his eye! Maddix smiles to the audience, who respond to the move with their normal dislike for the reigning OAOAST World Champion, then brings Zack to the corner, where he rams his head into the top turnbuckle...or not, as Malibu puts a foot up to block the move, then sends the World Champion's face directly into a turnbuckle! Maddix tries to move away, but Zack takes him by the head and rams his head into the turnbuckle a few more times, in rapid succession, before dropping him with a scoop slam. Zack then comes off the ropes and nails Landon with a kneedrop across his forehead, and that leads to the first pinfall of the match. ONE! T-NO! Maddix is as resilient as he is brash, and gets a shoulder up almost as soon as the count begins. He's led up to his feet by Zack, who tries for a back suplex...but Landon floats over and spins Malibu around before shoving him! Zack gives Landon a look that expresses feelings of "are you KIDDING me?" and shoves back, causing the champion to fume. Landon and Zack go nose to nose now, their faces red with anger as they lock up, vying for position. Both men get their taste of an advantage, until Malibu snares Landon by the head and brings him over to the canvas! Zack holds on, but Landon uses a headscissors to pull him off, and both men get back to their feet. Zack goes for an open hand slap, gets blocked, and gets the second attempt blocked as well. Maddix then drives a boot into his gut, hammers him with a forearm across the back of the neck, and takes Zack over with a suplex that rocks the ring! Landon gets up and hits the ropes, following thru with a kick to the side of Zack's face as he gets up! COLE They'd be proud of that one, right here in the home of soccer. COACH Apparantly, they call it 'football' over here. What a backwards country, eh? Zack winds up hanging over the middle rope, and Landon sits on his back, pulling up on the rope in an attempt to strangle Malibu! At the referee's demand, Landon backs off (after taking advantage of the five count, natch), then leans over the top rope and rakes at Zack's face, tearing the skin back before being forced to break by Nick Patrick once again. Landon pleads his case, but it's just an opening for PRL to get involved, as he runs across the apron and jumps to the floor, bringing Zack's throat down across the middle rope! COLE There's what we talked about earlier! Tha Puerto Rican and Landon Maddix want to take Zack Malibu out of the equation and they are working hard at it tonight, breaking whatever rules they see fit in the process of course! Once PRL does his part, Landon rolls Zack onto his back and covers, barking at Patrick to start counting. ONE! TW-KICKOUT! COACH Looks like they're gonna be doin' a lot more of it, Mikey Cole. Maddix brings Zack up, trapping him in a front facelock to keep him at bay while Landon makes the tag. PRL comes in, and with Zack held in the facelock, kicks him in the stomach and then takes over for Landon, putting him in a headlock. PRL leads Zack to center ring, wrenching the hold, but when Malibu gathers himself, he lifts PRL up off his feet...but Tha Puerto Rican holds on, able to bring himself back to earth! Malibu tries a different approach, shoving PRL forward before he can totally regain his balance, and when PRL hits the ropes, Zack tries for a hiptoss on the rebound. He catches PRL, but the Lightning Crew leader won't go over, and instead counters with one of his own. This time it's Zack who won't be taken over, but PRL acts quick, hitting a knee to the gut, then drapes his leg over Zack's head, gaining some leverage as he backflips over to his feet...and just barely ducks a Malibu lariat! Both men run the ropes and try for dropkicks, and both come up short. As they get back to their feet PRL tries a chop, but Zack blocks with his elbows, then takes PRL's arm and wrenches, moving behind him in a hammerlock. PRL swings around, trying to use his free elbow to strike, but Zack ducks, hits an inverted atomic drop, and then runs the ropes to put some momentum behind a spinning wheel kick that nails Tha Puerto Rican across the tip of his chin! "YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" COLE Zack, so quick! COACH He's goin' for the tag Mikey! Sure enough, once he gains his bearings after the spinkick, Zack begins to scramble for his corner. But before he can make the tag Landon scoots in and blindsights him, dragging Malibu into the centre of the ring before he's forced to re-assume his position on the apron. COLE Landon seems to want no part of his former right-hand man. COACH Or, he just wants Zack to take all the punishment and maybe end up less than 100% for AngleSlam. COLE Or, both. PRL tags Landon back in, the World Champion again forced to cut off a tag on the other side. Landon stomps away on Zack, gradually moving towards the ribs once he's softened The Franchise up. Taking a moment to warn his tenuous partner to 'buck his ideas up', Landon then whips Zack into the ropes, looking for a clothesline. Zack swoops underneath though, coming off the ropes and hitting Landon with the spinning wheel kick! COLE Well, that ought to shut Landon's mouth. Literally and figuratively. With Maddix down, it's PRL's turn to come in and prevent the tag. He drags Zack away, drawing Cortez into the ring. The referee is distracted as now PRL works over Zack, firing off right hands as he waits for Landon to get back up. The makeshift partners find enough co-operation within them to whip Malibu off the ropes, ready for a double team. But a double clothesline misses the mark and Zack comes back, connecting with a foot a-piece on a double dropkick! "YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!" COLE Now BOTH men down! This must be Zack's chance to tag! *clap clap clapclapclap, clap clap clap clap* "COR - TEZ!" *clap clap clapclapclap, clap clap clap clap* "COR - TEZ!" COLE Listen to this. I never, ever thought I'd hear an OAOAST crowd cheering or chanting for Todd Cortez! COACH Me neither! The English crowd's football (*groan*... 'soccer') chant makes it clear what they want. Malibu is back up before his opponents, but in the wrong half of the ring. And with Landon and PRL quickly regaining their feet, Zack has to act quickly. Tucking and rolling, he avoids the lunges of both opponents, coming up to his feet in the corner AND MAKING THE TAG!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Here comes Cortez!! Landon's eyes bulge and quick as a flash, he dives for the outside. Cortez goes right for Tha Puerto Rican then, springboarding to the top rope and wiping out The Corporate Champion with a high-flying dropkick! Wheeling around, Cortez looks for Landon. He's routed to the floor though, so Cortez grabs PRL. A European Uppercut connects. And a second. One more, setting up and irish whip. Tha Puerto Rican goes underneath a clothesline and builds up some speed, throwing himself at Todd with a crossbody... CAUGHT! Cortez catches PRL in his arms and throws him with a Fallaway Slam! ONE! TWO! Save by Landon! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Immediately, Landon begins to regret his intervention as The Urban Legend stands straight up. Maddix tries to beg off from his now former ally, crossing his heart on his honesty over a handshake offer. But what he doesn't realise is deep down, even as allies, Cortez has been waiting for this moment on and off for the best part of a year. And he can't wait to grab Landon by his blond hair, backing him up into a corner and UNLOADING with a heavy combo of right hands!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Oh my! The World Champion's closest, possibly only ally, an ally no more! COACH What an ingrate! What a dirty, rotten ingrate Cortez turned out to be! COLE What are you talking about!? With Megan only able to watch on in despair, Cortez continues to beat the hell out of his former partner. Irish whip follows, sending Landon corner to corner and HARD upside down in the turnbuckles! Teetering on the top, Landon manages to avoid tumbling to the floor and rolls back down the turnbuckles. However, he walks straight into a Crotch-Droppah from Cortez! Landon almost takes flight from the force of the landing and immediately rolls to the floor. Cortez is ready to follow, until a recovered PR attacks from behind. Shaky leg kicks from The Corporate Champion, beating Cortez down before he "smells the electricity"! COACH He's smelling it! He's smelling it! PR whips Cortez off the ropes. Leapfrog from Tha Puerto Rican. And a reverse leapfrog... RIGHT ONTO CORTEZ'S SHOULDERS!! PRL Cortez carries PRL around in the electric chair for a second or two before he gains his bearings, reaching down and jamming a finger into the eye of The Urban Legend. PRL then slides down the back and grabs the back of Cortez's head, running him to the ropes and vaulting to the outside, dropping him throat-first across the top rope with The Ricochet! However, the moment PRL turns to get back into the ring, Air Malibu takes off WIPING OUT THA PUERTO RICAN WITH A SUICIDE DIVE THAT SENDS BOTH INTO THE EDGE OF THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!!!! COACH YO~!!!! COLE It's broken down here, bodies all over the place! Slowly getting to his feet, Cortez looks out at the bodies strewn in front of the announce table. He then turns around, guided by the crowd... into a DROPSAULT by Landon! Quickly Maddix hooks the leg with all his might... ONE! TWO! NO! MADDIX COME ON REFEREE!! Maddix rushes to his feet... and hesitates. Almost unsure over whether to put the boots to Cortez, as he eventually does. With the crowd booing his every move, Landon soon gets into the swing of things and begins to smile away as he lands with the stomps. Landon then backs off, encouraging Cortez back to his feet. However, out of the corner of his eye, he sees Zack and PRL beginning to get back up. The two rivals scrap away on the floor. Providing the perfect target for Maddix, who propels himself through bottom and middle rope WITH THE TOPÉ ESPECIAL!!! COLE WOAH! Maddix, taking out Zack... and PRL! And I've got my suspicions, that was no accident. COACH No shit, Sherlock. COLE I meant taking out PRL. The three components of AngleSlam's main-event lay on the floor and in a round about away, help/drag each other back up. Which leaves just Todd Cortez. No stranger to a risk or two, Cortez walks over to that side of the ring and shows great balance by climbing the ropes in the centre. Getting his footing on the top rope he then soars, WIPING EVERYONE OUT, INCLUDING STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK, WITH A SHOOTING STAR SUICIDA!!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE OH, MY~! "COR - TEZ!" "COR - TEZ!" "COR - TEZ!" "COR - TEZ!" Understandably, all four men are slow getting up. It's Cortez up first though, throwing PRL into the ring and following close after. As PRL climbs back up he's measured by The Urban Legend, who waits for him to turn around before burying a boot into the gut. Lindsay Gonzalez reacts almost as quickly as the fans, who pop at the prospect of the Riot Act Plus... but as Lindsay jumps to the apron and distracts the ref, PRL goes low! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Ugh, typical PRL! A cheapshot, with his fiancee providing the distraction! COACH The Women's Champion, Lindsay Gonzalez. COLE What does that have to do with anything? With Cortez stunner by the shot below the belt, Tha Puerto Rican quickly pulls Todd in by the arm and puts the spine on the pine, dead centre of the ring! Lindsay drops back to the floor, as in spite of themselves, the fans rise to their feet. PRL removes his right elbow pad, spitting on it and throwing it into the face of The Urban Legend. He does some weird hand signals, and then bounces off the ropes, jumps over Cortez, and then bounces off the opposite ropes. PR stops short of the elbow and just simply flips Todd off... and then drops the most electrifying move in professional wrestling, the INTENSEZONE ELBOW! "YEEEEAAHHHH - BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COACH The IntenseZone Elbow! The IntenseZone Elbow, the most electrifying move in spor... *SMACK!* "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE SCHOOL'S OUT!! SCHOOL'S OUT!! Zack catches PRL in a pre-mature celebration with the Superkick and slumps over top with the cover... ONE! TWO! TH- NO, LANDON SAVES!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Straight up to his feet, Landon catches Malibu on the way up with a kick. Lining him up, Landon then fires off a HARD roundhouse to the chest! Zack falls backwards, getting rolled right the way through as his feet fly up and being lifted up into a fireman's carry... NO! Zack escapes down the back and goes for the ANGLE SLA... NO! With a quick hop, Maddix lands behind! Both men stumble and as Zack meets the turnbuckles, he quickly pushes himself off, coming with SCHOOL'S OUT... *SMACK!* ...NAILING PRL FOR A SECOND TIME!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Aw, damn it! COLE PRL gets hit again... and I think Landon might have pulled him in the way! As Tha Puerto Rican collapses through the ropes and to the floor, Landon capitalises on the brief confusion, as he catches Zack and drives him face-first with the Complete Shot! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Zack rebounds off the canvas hard. With his opponent already beginning to roll, Landon kicks Zack the rest of the way out of the ring, putting the badmouth on him as he hits the ringside mats. Little does the World Champion realise what's behind him though. With a last insult thrown at The Franchise, Maddix turns around... into a boot! Standing headscissors, Cortez giving the signal.... *WHAM!* ...AND SPIKING MADDIX ON HIS HEAD WITH THE RIOT ACT PLUS~! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE Oh my God, he got him! COACH Oh no... The fans are on their feet, as Cortez flips Landon over, hooking the leg, Megan watching on with her hands on her head... ONE! TWO! THREEEEEE!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" *DINGDINGDING!* COLE OH. MY! BUFFER Your winners of the match... the team of "THE URBAN LEGEND" TODD CORTEZ and ZACK MMMAAAALLIIIIBBUUUUUUU!!!! The London crowd are going positively NUTS, as Cortez's hand is raised in victory. The not-so quick thinking production team, not being told ahead of time of Zack's partner, cue up "Getting Away With Murder". But it doesn't matter to Cortez what music is playing as he stands over Landon Maddix, victorious. COLE What a shocking turn of events... another shocking turn of events, in a situation rife with them! Todd Cortez has PINNED the World Heavyweight Champion! COACH Look at Megan, she can't believe this is happening. I can't either! As Landon's World Heavyweight Title is passed into the ring ready for him to wake-up, Cortez quickly snatches it from the referee. Leaning over the unconscious La Cucaracha, Cortez yells something at the fallen Champion before raising the title over his head, to a huge cheer! On the outside, Zack Malibu looks on, seemingly unsure of what to make of what's just happened. Next to him, Popick has the same look as he kneels beside Tha Puerto Rican. COLE Until about ten minutes ago, Cortez was still Landon Maddix's, for the want of a better word, 'lackey'. And now, he stands over him, holding his World Heavyweight Championship!! What the hell does this mean for Landon Maddix, for all of these men in the run-up to AngleSlam 2007!? Cortez finally drapes the belt over the still KOed World Champion. Eyeing up Malibu, he then exits the ring and backs up the aisle as we... FADE OUT.

Go to OAOASTShop.com to buy the latest in OAOAST merchandise! Toys! Belts! T-shirts! Foam hands! Bandanas! Chains! Wrist bands! And anything else your heart desires! You can find what the OAOAST superstars wear at only one place, OAOASTShop.com! AOL keyword: OAOASTShop! COLE Welcome back fans, and coming up next is a match that's...well...certainly unique. At least for this company. COACH If you ask me, there should be MORE Bra And Panty Matches in the OAOAST! I mean, I like looking at sweaty, oiled up, shirtless dudes as much as the next guy, but the female body is magnificent. The female sex is the greatest thing God ever created. So many curves, so many features, the female body is absolutely breathtaking. That is why I say we should show more appreciation towards the female body by having more Bra And Panty Matches, so that way, all of us males could get a nice good close look at mother nature in her purest, most marvelous form. COLE Coach, this is wrestling, not poetry night at the local college. Would you cut the pretentious mumbo jumbo? You just want more Bra And Panty Matches so that you can see the women of the OAOAST half naked more often! COACH Yeah, I was just frontin'! I just want to see some TITAYS~! and some BOOTAYS~! BOO-YAH~! COLE That's better. Now, this is the first time the OAOAST World Tag Team Titles are going to be defended under these rules. So the challengers don't have to worry that much about wrestling skills. All they have to do is just take the clothes off of the Champs, and they become the new Tag Team Champions! COACH I've been looking forward to this match ever since it was announced! So many questions: what color underwear will the girls wear? Will they wear thongs? Granny panties? Boy shorts? I hope it's thongs! Oh how I love thongs! Will they be see-through? Lace? Silk? Oh boy! Oh boy! Oh boy! COLE I think a better question is whether Mackenzie DeCenzo can keep her lustful urges for Alix and Krista in tact in order to keep her job in The Enterprise and bring them the World Tag Team Titles. COACH Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, speaking of OAOASTShop.com, I was just reading the OAOAST Divas 2007: Bahamas Edition, and by reading, I mean staring at the pictorials, and I noticed something. I saw Alix, I saw Lindsay, I saw Krista, I saw Melody, I even saw Princess Stacey...DAMN girl, where did all that ass come from? What you been hiding in those jeans? But you know what? I see no Mackie! And no Jade either! Where did they go? COLE Well, Jade was too shy, and didn't want to pose in bikinis. And Mackenzie refused to participate, saying it was 'beneath her'. COACH 'Beneath her', eh? Say, you don't think Mackie took the magazine and used it to...well...pleas-- COLE Let's stop there, Coach. COACH After what we've learned about her these past few months, it's possible. COLE Just stop right there! And hey, you might get your wish tonight. Jade and Mackenzie might end up barely clothed if Alix and Krista have their way. COACH Can't a Bra And Panties Match end when all four girls are stripped of their clothes? COLE Nope. Sorry. It's either gotta be Chicks Over Dicks or Mackenzie and Jade that are stripped. Can't have it both ways. COACH Rats! Oh well, I'm ready. Oh, I am SOOO ready for this one! Tonight, we're either going to see two hot lesbians with little on, OR we're going to see a closested hot lesbian AND a barely legal 19-year-old with little on! It's a win-win situation! COLE You are a lonely man. COACH Don't ruin this for me, Cole! I put up with enough of your crap on a daily basis! Just let me enjoy this one, okay? COLE Fine. Fine. You won't be alone in enjoying this one, I can tell you that. Pretty much all male OAOAST fans will be watching this match pretty closely. COACH We have female OAOAST fans? COLE ANYWAY, the time for talk is over. COACH YES! COLE It's a match alot of people have been very much anticipating. COACH I've been waiting for this all week! COLE First time in OAOAST history that the Tag Team Titles will be defended in a Tag Team Bra And Panties Match. COACH Let's get on with it! COLE Chicks Over Dicks... COACH Hot. COLE take on Jade Rodez and Mackenzie DeCenzo... COACH Also hot. COLE In a Tag Team Bra And Panties Match for the OAOAST World Tag Team Titles. COACH Let's start ripping some clothes! COLE Now, let's go to Michael Buffer... COACH Hot--no wait! COLE ...who's standing by with the introductions. COACH COME ON! START TAKING SOME CLOTHES OFF!!! COLE Calm down, will ya!? Cut to the ring where Michael Buffer is standing by. *DING DING DING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen it is time for our OAOAST World Tag Title Bra and Panties Match! “YEAAAAA!” BUFFER In order to win a team must strip both their opponents to their bra and panties! Now let's meet the challengers. Date with the Night kicks in for what may be the first time in ages. But through the entrance doors comes not Jade Rodez, but eternal spotlight hogs, Simon Singleton and Ned Blanchard. Fresh off their questionable victory from early tonight, the two boast Cheshire cat grins that aren't warmly received by the sold out audience. Ned, outfitted in a yellow and green polka dot suit, points to the part of his waist where his championship would normally rest, and screams “Still the champ, baby!” to the fans. Simon stands at his side, popping the collar of his bright orange silk shirt. The ever present Siclopse is being maintained by unpaid intern Molly Nerdly, who sports a green polo shirt and perfectly ironed khaki pants. COLE The Enterprise took their cheating to new and despicable lows earlier tonight, working to steal the six man titles from Leon Rodez and D*LUX. And as we see Ned, Simon and Molly come down for a match they're not even involved in, I think it's safe to say the tag titles, and by extension, Thursday's scramble cage match are definitely in jeopardy. Standing atop the entrance way with arms raised in worship towards the arriving competitor, the three blonds herald the emergence of Jade Rodez. As green and gold lights bounce across the venue, the much maligned young lady dips her feet into an ocean of hatred and disgust. Beyond a twisting curl of strawberry blonde hair lies a look arctic indifference, greatly contrasting the cries of praise heaped upon her by her teammates. The tight, form fitting pink tracksuit she wears, twists and turns with each contour of her comely body, as she stoically marches towards the ring. Her assistants in her quest for championship gold trail behind her, never once ceasing their words of encouragement. BUFFER First from Grand Rapids, Michigan, being accompanied by Ned Blanchard, Simon Singleton, and Molly Nerdly, weighing in at one hundred forty pounds, she is Jade Rodez! COLE Gotta say Jade Rodez didn't look all that confident heading into this match, but one look at her face and you'd never know it. She's an ice woman, and she'll need to be considering that her opponents are three time tag team champions, and her former best friends. Moneymaker has waged a war against homosexuals, and Jade is just his latest weapon. The announcement of her name is not warmly welcomed by the Londoners. However if that bothers Jade her apathetic expression certainly doesn't show it. Nor does the lazy, almost uncaring way she enters the ring and begins stretching against the ropes. The rest of The Enterprise positions themselves on the outside, applauding their associate. COLE As Moneymaker told us earlier tonight, this match will have a definite affect on the Scramble Cage match this Thursday. That is to say if Jade and Mackenzie win the Cage match is off, and an arrangement will be worked out with the HI-YAH tag team champions. The punk meets disco aura of Blondie's Call Me fills the night sky for the second time this evening. The reception for this instance's wrestler is slightly kinder then the one received by the Beverly Hills Blonds. As the powerhouse drumming booms along with a strobe of pink, orange, and red lights, images of Mackenzie DeCenzo's various business triumphs decorate the Synditron. But once the entrance doors part, it becomes apparent Mackenzie's isn't wearing anything fit for the board room! Her limber figure stands behind a wall of leather; black leather pants highlighted by a design of scorpion, and a button up short sleeve leather vest that hangs tightly over her desirable chest. Her hands flick through the elegantly curled heaping of her bleached hair as she journeys down the ramp. BUFFER And her partner, from Beverly Hills, California, by way of Princeton, New Jersey, she is a former 24/7 champion, and the chief financial officer of The Enterprise, she is MACKENZIE DECENZO! Mackenzie projects a graceful smile into the peering camera, then proceeds to skip down the ramp. Inadvertently her eyes gaze towards the more attractive women in the stands, a fact that certainly doesn't bode well when one figures her opponents are two of the most gorgeous women on television. COACH Cold blooded! Moneymaker a straight G, making Mackenzie enter by herself! But yo, if he don't want her working for him, I got a couple positions I could use her in. Naw mean? COLE You touched on a good point, this tag title match is going to be one hell of a test of Mackenzie's loyalty. Will she push The Enterprise's goal, or will she seek the freedom of Alix and Krista's lesbian lifestyle? Mackenzie slides into the ring, where she's greeted with an awkward nod from her disinterested partner. The other Enterprise's members, barely offer her passing glance, too concerned with making sure the Siclopse is properly set up. "C-O-D! C-O-D! C-O-D!" the audience now sings. Almost if on cue the opening spiel of Girlfriend blasts into London Hey, hey, you, you I don't like your girlfriend! No way, no way! I think you need a new one Hey, hey, you, you I could be your girlfriend! The infectious bounce that characterizes Avril Lavigne's top 40 track Girlfriend fills the arena with peppy brilliance, and draws a gargantuan amount of cheers from the now standing audience. As pink lights flicker illumination at the entrance stage, chants of “C-O-D” are already the order of the day for many fans. A pink pyro waterfall rains from the ceiling, connecting with a red pyro fountain, both beautiful displays sprinkling the entrance way with shimmering sparks. Once the pairing subsides, a golden pyro wall engulfs the stage with it's tremendous size, leaving behind a thick haze of simmering smoke in it's wake. Through the build up of smoke appears the gorgeous image of Krista Isadora Duncan. The viscous vixen is attired much differently then usual, high heeled legs that are typically roam free from a mini skirt, are now shielded behind diamond encrusted leather pants, and her splendid upper body fills out green tye up t-shirt. Alix, in casual prep attire of heavily flared A&F jeans, and a pink and white stripe polo shirt, bounces from the entry doors, whipping the raucous crowd into further frenzy! COLE These London fans are on their feet for COD! COACH Even the ones who are sitting down are standing up! Myself included. And speaking of standing up, you need to stand up and salute Mister Moneymaker for bringing us our first ever tag title bra and panties match! Krista uses her strong arm as an impassable obstacle, halting Alix in her tracks. With Alix temporally subdued, Krista brings her hands over Ally's head and gently slides her warm touch down her back, before vigorously thrusting her saucy girlfriend into her arms. Giggling at Krista's show of affection, Ally turns over her shoulders, brushes a strand of her brown locks out her face, and tosses a bewitching kiss to the camera. Cute super imposed red lips to pop on the screen. BUFFER And the champions.... “C-O-D! C-O-D! C-O-D!” BUFFER .....first, from Los Angeles, California, she is two time twenty four seven champion, the CEO of Mrs.Spezia's sweeties, The Hollywood Bad Girl, ALIX MARIA SPEZIA! And her partner, from Los Angeles, California, she is a best selling author, a fitness queen, and star of the world famous FIT with KID line of exercise videos, she is Miss California Krista Isaodra Duncan! Together they are three time OAOAST world tag team champions, America's Sweethearts, and Hollywood “It” Girls, Chicks Over Dicks! COACH Get up, Cole! Get up you damn ingrate! Get up and offer thanks to our lord, our king, Mister Moneymaker. Because of him we will now behold the hottest, sexiest match in OAOAST history! Get up and praise, Mister Moneymaker! He has earned his place with the gods! I, Coach, declare Mister Moneymaker, a deity! An epic revolutionary of sports entertainment, and a paragon of American morality. Tonight, Cole, tonight, Moneymaker begins his conquest of the universe. COLE What are you talking about? It's the four women who are fighting! COACH But Theodore Moneymaker orchestrated the brilliance, as only a God can! He aligned the heavens, and he will send the lesbians to hell. But not before they get naked and makeout. Hands joined in loving matrimony, Ally and Krista skip down the ramp. Alix waves and tosses appreciative kisses towards her legion of loving fans, while Krista simply twirls her hair around her finger, and stages a smile of devilishly charming arrogance. COACH My word, Cole, what a humble, humble, god, our lord, Mister Moneymaker is! What wonderous gifts he gives us unworthy mortals! COLE I'm the gay guy and even I think you sound wild homo. You act like you'd rather see him in his underwear then Alix and Krista! Alix positions herself on the ring apron, while Krista slides into the ring. The houselights go up and the match seems ready to get underway. COLE This isn't your typical wrestling match, so COD's advantage isn't quite as strong. Jade and Mackenzie just need to get them into positions where they can get rid of their clothing. DING DING DING The contest begins with Krista squaring off against Jade. Or a highly reluctant Jade. Given that she spent the better part of the past two years worshiping the ground Krista walked on, only to turn around and align with the Antichrist without a hint of explanation, Jade isn't exactly sure how to gage Krista's rage-o-meter. The cool smirk on her face, certainly doesn't make it any easier. Thus all Jade can do is meet Krista for a very tentative lockup. Miraculously, Jade is able to snatch Krista into a hammer lock. Stunned by her achievement, J-Ro mouthes words of congratulations to herself. Unfortunately the self satisfied distraction weakens the grip, and allows Miss California to easily escape the hold. Krista's bubblegum pink lips shoot a condescending smile towards the now vexed Jade Rodez. “LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA!” Despite her exacerbation with Krista's glee, the teenager only meekly steps into another lockup. Unfortunately, she simply gets fireman carried for her efforts. As the Englanders applaud her defeat, Jade's ill temper grows worse, and she rips her body off the mat to offer a more vehement challenge Krista. However, the SoCal queen easily counters her effort by grabbing onto her pink tracksuit and flipping her over with another fireman's carry. COLE You don't see too many fireman's carries in these types of matches, Coach. COACH And I hope we don't see any more! I didn't pay to see the moves of the nineteen eighties, I paid to see half naked women, Cole. COLE I don't think you paid to see anything! “Let's hear it for Jade!” Krista shouts in mock encouragement. “SHE HAS GONOHRREHA! SHE HAS GONOHRREHA!” the Londoners sing back. “Alrighty, let's hear it for a little less information next time” Krista replies. The rage inside Jade builds to an unstoppable crescendo, and her Nike Air Max's carry her forward in a boiling fury. Yet, her assault is quickly grounded to a halt by a third fireman's carry. The second Jade's limber figure hits the canvas, the audience resumes chanting Krista's name. This does not sit well with Jade, and her facial features form a disgusted frown. COACH Enough of the “How to wrestle” instructional tapes! Let's get down to pimpin! Heeding Coach's advice, Krista grabs onto Jade's bleach blond hair and drags her off the mat. She grins devilishly as her hands eagerly rove across the velor fabric of Jade's track suit. But before Krista can even attempt to free Jade's melons from their tight constraints, her former protege begins rifling punches into her midsection. The impact of the blows is fierce enough that it forces Krissy to cease her assault on Jade's clothing. The sullen diva acts quick, and hooks her foe into a front face lock in preparation for a DDT. But that move never comes to pass, thanks to Krissy effortlessly countering her into a northern lights suplex! J-Ro lands in a whimpering, pink,and blonde heap. But her misery doesn't there; Krista rolls through the move, bringing Jade back to her feet. Fortunately for Jade, Miss California doesn't use a second northern lights suplex. Unfortunately for Jade, Krista's fingers claw at her pants with a ferocious craving. The audience (and Ned) emits a shout of excitement, as the slightest hint of the raspberry colored Brazllian cut panties that frame Jade's lean ass is finally given. Red in the face in sheer embarrassment, Jade demands her Enterprise mates come and rescue her. “I hall save thee! Viva La Singleton!” Simon declares, shortly before Ned gives him a sneaky little shove to the ground. COLE Ned just tripped his own partner, who was going to go help his own stable mate! COACH Simon tripped! The man has trouble with balance, he's got aspergers syndrome. Realizing that her rescue ship sunk before it left the dock, Jade is left to mount her own frantic defense. She digs into Krista's flashy t-shirt, and tugs with a herculean effort. The Londoners cheers magnify at the possibility of seeing Krista's bodacious mammaries in addition to Jade's tush. COLE Krista's shirt is by Topless Californian, and we're about to see a topless Californian if Jade has her way! Actually, Jade doesn't have her way, as Krista destroys the steamy flesh tease by dropping Jade into a lion tamer. The nineteen year old bellows terrible cries of pain, as the pain instantly shoots through her back. Krista feels enough of a soft spot for her old friend to ease up on the hold. Seconds later, she's forced to relinquish the move altogether, when she spots the bothersome Singleton on the ring apron. With two great strides of her long legs, Krista ventures towards Si's location and feels him with a single slap! Si topples to the floor, where his booming thud is met with chants of, YOU GOT BITCH SLAPPED! YOU GOT BITCH SLAPPED! Molly takes umbrage to Krissy's actions, “You can't do that to Simon! He's a pillar of the community!” “Ha! And you must've done a pillar of crack to actually think that!” The blonde beauty leaves Molly to seethe on the outside, and returns her focus towards her in ring rival. However, Jade used the distraction provided by Molly and Simon to recover her strength, and stuns the Hollywood covergirl with a spear. Though the blow was delivered with great speed, it did little in the way of damage to Krissy, and she hastily attempts to scramble to her feet. Yet, the severe grip Jade applies on her sun streaked locks keeps her grounded, and she's drawn into a world of pain when the youngster begins slamming her face into the sweat stained canvas. "LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA!" the fans sing, led on by Alix. The repugnant odor of the mat coupled with the harshness of Jade's attacks harms Krista greatly, and her wearied face is thrown into a fit of coughing. A chill settles over Jade's mind, as she watches her ex-mentor struggle horribly to hang onto her fleeting air. Smirking coldly, J-Ro steps forward and implants her Nike tennis shoe into Krista's midsection. A heartwrenching wail of pain leaves Krissy's lips, and broadens the smile of Jade's deep red ones. Now seeking to repay Kris for the earlier embarrassment she struck her with, Jade's hand journey towards the back laces of Krista's top. She summons a savage growl, as she tugs on the top string, stretching the thin fabric well beyond it's tolerance. The capacity crowd is roused into raucous cheers simply by the emerging sight of Krissy's sculpted abs. The fitness queen tries to make certain that's the only of thing of her's that's getting shown, violently rebelling against Jade's invasive grip. But the Grand Rapids native emphatically magnifies her efforts, and more and more of Miss California's kissable skin is exposed, much to the delight of the fans and Mackenzie. COACH Check it out! Trapped within Jade's merciless whims, Krista arches backwards to hinder her relentless mauling. What fabric that isn't hanging in shreds, stretches taut into her sides. Her holstered breasts fight for freedom from the constraining ill-fitting top, leading a squeal of discomfort to spill from Krista's mouth. She mounts a mammoth struggle to break free of Jade's bonds, but her fiery foe continues tugging. Finally, Krista exerts a last ditch effort, and simply implants her high heel shoe into Jade's forehead. Cursed by an enormous headache, Jade painfully staggers away from her victim. Her teary eyes impair her vision, and force her to stumble into the mischievous domain of Alix Spezia. Ally is quick to make good on that promise of mischief, grabbing Jade's track jacket and gingerly tugging it onto her head. With the shirt mashed against her bleached hair, wide tear soaked eyes, and expression of manic anguish, Jade appears like Beavis in his Great Hornholio routine. Of course this isn't lost on the mocking Alix, “I am Cornholio! I need T-P for my Bunghole! You will give me TP, bungholio! Are you threatening me? My people need holio!” While Jade doesn't have any “holio” or “T-P” she does have the slightly more annoying problem of Krista whipping her towards a vacant corner. Jade's back smacks against the steel padding, but she has little time tolament her fate, given that the beach babe is darting towards her with a body splash. Thankfully for The Enterprise, Jade uses her basic wrestling ability to evade the incoming covergirl. She positions her self atop the second turnbuckle, and as Krista nears, she dives forward with a sunset flip! With Krista stunned by the sudden shift in positions, Jade immediately sets herself to the task of ridding her of her pants. Eyes flaming with wild hunger, Jade restlessly tries to dig through the rhinestone encrusted fabric. Her efforts yield a scintillating glimpse of the sparkling black panties that are scarcely large enough to be considered a necklace. But the audience is treated to no more then that, as Krista uses her superior strength to power away from Jade. Both ladies rush to their feet at the same moment, but it's Jade who strikes first, lobbing a lariat towards her foe. Yet even with half her ass hanging out, Krista is able to summon enough speed to duck bellow the incoming missile. Jade clumsily teeters forward as a result of the avoidance, but composes herself quickly enough to unleash a discus lariat. Unfortunately the strike is savagely snuffed out by an enziguri from the former beauty queen. The crowd responds to the attack with a sizable pop, not so much because they've been dying to see an enziguri, but because the abrupt motion of the strike jerked down Krista pants to reveal even more of her lusty BUTT. Overcome by frustration at not being able to best her ex-friend, Jade smacks the canvas in...uh...frustration. The Brits aren't sympathetic to her plight, and greet her anger with a chorus of jeers and taunts. This only serves to further her annoyance, and she continues pounding the canvas. Unlike, the spectators, Krista feels a pang of pity for Jade, and decides to lend her a hand. “If you want something done right...have Krista do it” she comments, shooting Jade a smile of superior victory. She reaches behind for the clasp of her t-shirt, arching her back out and causing her enormous tits to jut out to the incredible glee of the fans. With a single swipe of her hand, the tattered shirt flutters away from her chest, unveiling her massive tits, encased in a very sexy, lacy black bra. The bra lifts her already perky breasts and pushes them together forming an impossibly deep cleavage where the ample flesh of her upper breasts welled up against each other. The skimpy bra is magnificently low cut affording an wonderful amount of bronze flesh for the cheering audience to feast their hungry gazes upon. On the ring apron, Makcenzie fans herself in effort to keep from fainting. Back in the ring, Jade's inability to accomplish what Krista did in two seconds, causes her to tailspin into another temper tantrum. COLE Krista just took off her own top, setting her team at a disadvantage! COACH I'd drop the full thirty thousand G's to get the sex change to hit that! No homo. While the London chapter of the Gay and Lesbian education network hoots and hollers, Krista melons sway and bounce in stunning display as she ventures towards her corner. A tag is made with the fully clothed Alix Speiza, and the the roar of the crowd expands exponentially. Fixing a frost bitten stare upon her former friend, Jade tries to gain the upper hand by clubbing Ally as she enters the ring. But Ally is much too quick for her foe, and blocks the strike with a back elbow. Clutching her burning face, Jade teeters into the ropes, where she pleads for help from her mind numbingly terrible Enterprise mates. Once again it's Simon who dutifully answers the call to arms, returning to the ring apron to wage war with COD. With casual grace, Alix simply grabs onto his rat's nest of hair and roughly begins hauling him over the ropes! As the Hollywood Bad Girl begins yanking out more and more of his hair extensions, his screams become more pronounced, leading Molly and Ned to lend him assistance. “YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! I ATTENDED A SEMESTER OF COMMUNITY COLLEGE!” Simon bellows. Molly and Ned latch onto his khaki pants and a grandiose game of tug of war ensues. As Simon is pulled every which way by friend and foe alike, he's debased into a sobbing wreck. Eventually the combined power of Molly and Ned is enough to win Simon his release. Unfortunately the combined power of Molly and Ned is also enough to yank off his pants, revealing his Kim Possibile(!!) panties to the world. Even the male members of the London chapter of the Gay and Lesbian Education Network can't helped but be repulsed by the horrific sight, because man, Simon ain't all that good looking a dude. Yes homo. Sitting in shock, Molly wonders, “Uh, sir, far be it for me to question your glorious wisdom, but uh....” “Why the hell are you wearing panties, numbnuts?!” Ned shouts. “Because it's a bra and panties match. Obviously.” Meanwhile, Jade tries to ignore the terrible fact that she's being assisted by the worst incompetents money can buy. She latches onto Ally's leather bracelet covered wrist, and attempts to haul her into the ropes. But the brunette hottie reverses the hold with unerring ease, and it's J-Ro that's sent hurtling into the cables. Upon Jade's return, Ally's ADIDAS tennis shoes flash towards her with a lethal superkick. But Miss Rodez evades the move by sweeping bellow Alix's fast approaching foot. Rather then continue a run to the ropes, the Michigander comes to a full stop. She whirls around, and ambushes Alix with a surprise side headlock. While Ally's fabulous brown locks spill across her arm, Jade nods her frowning face towards the corner. She then breaks into a full charge, seeking to obliterate Alix with a Stratusfaction. But, right as Jade nears the ring posts, the SoCal honey latches onto her waistband and violently heaves her into the turnbuckles! To the mammoth pleasure of the capacity crowd, the youngster is crotched on the steel ring posts! “ALIX! ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” Pain is written across the countenance of Jade Rodez, and her agonized screams fill the British air. Unfortunately, the pain simply grows more harrowing, as Alix bends her backwards into a tree of woe position, and begins rifling a hellstorm of stomps into her stomach. Jade puts forth every effort to fight past the strikes, but they fall with such ferocity that there's little she can do but whimper and complain. Finally Alix ceases her stomp fest. But there's no reprieve for J-Ro, as the culinary sensation attacks her shirt with alarming barbarity. Again, Jade tries to fight back but there's little she can do against Alix's power, and the track jacket is discarded with little difficulty. The fans' eyes almost explode from their skull as they take in the fantastic image of Jade's firm rack in the sexy white sports bra. The way the bra barely contains her magnificent tits, and the way her hard nipples poke through the sheer fabric, spread thrills throughout the deepest recesses of their hungry minds. Alix earns further cheers by taking the top, stuffing it between her legs and riding it across the ring like a horse! ALIX! ALIX! ALIX! Jade isn't exactly thrilled that Alix's actions have made it so that her breasts seem in mortal danger of spilling out her delicate top, and she shoots daggers towards her once good friend. Alix simply shrugs and says “ Jade, possessions are fleeting, but the knowledge that men around the globe are masturbating to you will remain in your heart forever.” Ally's helpful advice doesn't do much to alleviate Jade's annoyance, and once The Enterprise gal composes herself, she stands up to gain vengeance on her enemy. Miss Rodez and her gravity-defying breasts zoom towards Alix with the intention of mowing her down with a lariat. But Ally handily avoids the strike, latching onto Jade's bright yellow hair and using it as a catapult to toss over the ropes! Thanks to blind luck alone, Jade somehow manages to land with her feet on the floor. She quickly recovers from the harrowing shock of nearly being splattered onto the mats, and scampers onto the ring apron. When Alix moves to shove her from her perch, Jade acts fast and slices a shoulder block into her midsection. The shot leaves Alix doubled over and wheezing, a perfect position for Jade to take advantage of. She grabs a clump of Ally's curled hair, then leaps backwards, taking herself off the ring apron and to the outside mats. The result of this is Alix's throat being lacerated against the harsh cables. The fans cheer, not because they've turned on Alix, but because Jade's bouncy little (or big) fellas continue to fight for sweet glorious freedom from her undersized bra. Uh, not that that even matters! What does matter is that Alix has made a speedy recovery from Jade's cheapshot, and strikes her former “Second Best Friend Forever” with a baseball slide dropkick. Jade is flung backwards, and her impeccably rounded breasts further squeak through the flimsy bra. While the crowd marvels at the jacktastic sight, The Hollywood Bad Girl follows Jade to the outside. This prompts Molly to tell Ned, “I really think you should be doing something.” “I'm not paying you to think.” “I'm an unpaid intern, sir.” Grumbling something about smart mouth Canadians, Ned gives into Molly's request, and goes to assist Jade. Problematically, he doesn't get very far as he trips and falls flat on his face. His wounded face turns towards a confused Mackenzie, and explains that he tripped over his shoelaces. He's wearing sandals. With no help on the horizon, the detested heel does the only logical thing, RUN LIKE HELL! The fans despise this act of cowardice mainly because Jade has the audacity to cover up her heaving pleasure mounds, dashing the dreams of chronic masturbators everywhere. Alix gives chase, inexplicably laughing like Elmer Fudd as she does so. J-Ro weaves past an array of camera man, who seek to capture her moment of topless humiliation and dives into the ring. As Alix stalks her trail, her worry struck eyes look towards the nearest exit. Unfortunately for her it happens to be fiercely guarded by one Krista Isaodra Duncan. “C-O-D! C-O-D! C-O-D!” the audience bleats. With all methods of escape blocked off, and her tag team partner, and allies turning more useless by the nanosecond, Jade is forced to stand and fight. She rifles a knife chop towards her adversary. But given that she's more concerned with keeping her boobs from bursting through her bra, then doing any real damage, the strike is delivered with very little force. Thus Ally catches onto the attacking arm and punishes her with the True Life: I just got beat up by a girl (STO). Jade's bra suddenly becomes the least of her worries, as a flash of blue hot pain spreads through her body. In celebration of her signature spot Alix chants “We're here, we're queer, we're gonna get up and cheer! “ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” “Straight people, it's okay, you can cheer to!” ALIX! ALIX! ALIX! Ally positions herself above Jade, and lets her hands alluringly explore the curled tresses of her brown hair, as the beautiful picture of her writhing and gyrating body sensually seduces the audience into an orgasmic trance. Unfortunately all this taunting has granted Jade the time she needs to recover. To Alix's amazement, Jade laces her legs around Alix's arms, then clamps down onto her super flared Abercrombie jeans. Jade uses the binds she has on Alix to suck the tag champion into a rollup! Somewhere Moneymaker is going into cardiac arrest, thanks to the fact that the move causes Alix's face to be lost within the perfection of Jade's crotch! “YEAAAAA!” COLE Oh my! “Ewww, Jade. There's this new invention called the shower, you should take one someday!” Having Alix at her mercy, arouses the primal fires in Jade. With inhuman ferocity she plows through the jeans to reach the beautiful BUTT that yearns to be free of it's denim restraints. Just the thought of getting to see Alix's scrumptious BUTT delves the crowd into a state of aroused frenzy. As she feels a cool breeze kiss the skin of her now exposed tush, Ally pleads with her old friend. “Hey, I was only kidding about the shower thing! It's great down here! Yum, yum, part of a balanced breakfast.” Alix's ass kissing (vagina kissing?) fails to achieve it's intended goal, and thankfully for the fans, the topless Jade continues her maniacal attempt on Alix's three hundred dollar jeans. With demonic determination, Jade wrenches Alix's pants further down her silken legs, finally rewarding the audience with the holy grail of the B&P match: Alix's phenomenally juicy ass, and it's gorgeous cheeks framed by a meager lace thong. The hellish battle to prevent Jade from whisking away her clothes, has the unintended side effect of causing Alix golden brown orbs, and Jade's bursting hooters to jiggle and jounce their way into masturbation hall of fame. The audience rocks the arena to it's very foundation with enthralled cheers, while Jade finally yanks the clunky jeans past Alix's tennis shoes! COACH That broad is serious, god damn! COLE I'll tell you what else is serious, Jade and Mackenzie are in the lead! Jade dismounts Alix, and slams the jeans onto the canvas in an act of rebellious triumph. A self congratulatory smile takes hold of her blood red lips, as the audience now stains her with hatred. Alix sits on her knees, shoes pressed into the lusted after steamy ass cheeks, breathing heavy from having been lost within the valley of Jade's crotch. Grand Rapids most famous daughter can't help but rub salt into Ally's wound, and steals one of her favorite moves, Pleased with her victory over her constant failures, Jade figures she's worked hard enough, and applies a tag to Mackenzie DeCenzo. Amidst the murmur of anticipation from the sold out audience, comes Mackenzie's reluctant cries of “No.” Jade doesn't bother listening to her qualms, instead stepping out onto the ring apron, and coldly ordering her into the match. Mackenzie's aversion refuses to subside, and she adamantly protests the tag. COLE This is supposed to be a test of loyalty for Mackenzie, but she's not looking terribly loyal right now! Ned screams these words of “encouragement” to Mackenzie, “Think about life without The Enterprise! Mid sized sedans, possibly even used, a townhouse in a suburb of Baltimore, not DC but Baltimore, eating out at chain restaurants, or even worse having to do your own grocery shopping!” I'm going to have to assume it was the thought of living near Baltimore that did it, because for whatever reason Mackenzie finally steps into the squared circle. Alix's dour mood improves drastically, at the sight of the leather covered Mackenzie, and her warm smile welcomes DeCenzo towards the ring. COLE Mackenzie and Alix had a brief run in for the 24/7 title early last year, but things have been pretty good between them lately. And things are about to get pretty hot between them now! Despite being overjoyed at seeing Mackenzie, Alix doesn't exactly roll out the welcome mat for her, instead spearing her to the canvas the second the valet takes her first steps. Flustered by the sudden attack, Mackenize quickly scampers upright, only to find the playful Miss Spezia swinging a knife edge chop her way. With cat-like quickness, Mackenzie offers her left hand in defense, and uses her right to grab hold of Alix's free hand. She then attempts to launch Alix into the nearby cables with an Irish whip. But the SoCal sex kitten's superior wrestling ability reverses DeCenzo's move. Rather then send her into the ropes, the thong bound Alix roughly drags her to the canvas with a short arm spear. Again, Mackie makes an attempt to scurry upright, but Ally dives onto her, locking her into place. COACH And now it gets hot Cole! The buxom brunette's tone legs slither against Mackenzie's lithe figure, electrifying them both with an erotic charge. Mackie emits a wall shaking moan, as Alix's oiled flesh wantonly massages her curvy body. The warm skin is flush with desire and inflames Mackenzie's feral instincts. So enraptured by Alix's touch, Mackenzie's offers scant resistance towards the sultry vixen's bid for her top, instead just gliding her hands along Alix's BUTT. She simply purrs in exultant release, as Alix's finger tips work their way up the rigid outlines of her stomach muscles. Soon Alix's delicate hands seize the buttons on her shirt, and tweak them apart. Sharp bolts of pleasurable pain smash into Mackenzie's head, as Alix's dominant fingers pump through submissive strings. The piece of fabric finally comes free, and flitters to the wayside. Two beautifully rounded breast bounce heavily into place, plump knockers that jostle against each other and shine with a wet gleam of perspiration. As the fans burst into an outpouring of cheers for the latest showing of skin, Alix gazes longingly at Mackenzie's unnaturally gorgeous body. “Hmm. That was easy.” Alix comments. A sly predatory look falls over Alix's visage, and she shimmers down to Mackenzie's feet to free her majestic legs of the far too constraining leather pants. A thunderous scream of excitement speeds through the stands once Alix bends over and affords the audience with a cameltoelishcous view of her luscious g-string cald ass. She tugs onto the rhinestone waistband, showcasing the faintest glimpse of Mackenzie's shimmering panty framed BUTT cheeks. But, before the home viewing audience can be given reason to make a mad dash for the bottle of Johnson and Johnson, Mackenzie snaps out of the erotic stupor Alix lulled her to, and viciously begins fighting back against her aggressor. COACH I guess Mackenzie just realized the value of not spending the rest of her life living in a cardboard box. I love a good cat fight! Her manicured hands curl around Alix's streaming locks, and promptly yank on them as though they were weeds to be torn from the dirt. The Hollywood Bad Girl is shocked into shouts of discomfort by Mackenzie's actions. COLE I thought Mackenzie... COACH Hey, I'm sure she does have a crush on Alix and Krista, but puppy love can't pay the light bills, baby. Now sit back and think of ponies or Usher, or R.Kelly, or whatever it is you think about at smoking hot moments like this. Summoning a tone of steely rage, Alix slashes her talons through Mackenzie's platinum strands. As the women fight fire with fire, the crowd remains red hot, thanks to Alix's nearly bare BUTT and Mackenzie's enhanced rack, bouncing and swaying with each tousle and struggle. On the outside Ned implores Molly to capture this on the Siclopse, but she maintains that they're creative efforts would be better served exploring the Natterjack Toad's sexual habits as it relates to the stages of the moon on days of increased bio hazardous health warnings. In order to assist Mackenzie in her lopside war with the champ, Jade darts into the ring, and kicks Alix in the BUTT. The sudden shot takes Ally off balance, which allows Mackenzie to capture her into a school girl. “LET'S GO ALIX! LET'S GO ALIX! LET'S GO ALIX!” Pleased with her trickery, Jade quickly departs the ring. And wisely so, as Krissy seems remarkably eager to get a piece of her. While referee Clem Buzzlefoxer, tries to clam Krista down, Mackenzie works to take advantage of the assistance her team mate offered her. Unfortunately, Mackenzie is a slave to her sexual desires, and instead of pillaging Alix's polo shirt, her watering mouth greedily directs her hands towards the spicy Latina's underwear. Her carnal lust screams towards epic proportions, as her hands peel away the lone barrier that blocks her from the goldmine of Alix's mouth watering thighs Embarrassment worms onto Alix's face, and she squeaks while trying to prevent herself from falling prey to Mackenzie's fleshy yearnings. COACH There's nothing under there! Go Mackenzie! Go! COLE How is trying to take off a lesbian's underwear proving her loyalty towards her homophobic boss? Robbing the midnight chokers of a perfectly good fantasy, Ally powerfully kicks out of Mackie's clutches. However she isn't quite free of Mackenzie's inflamed passion, and The Enterprise's personnel director makes a desperate lunge for her lean body. Ally counters Mackenzie's efforts by leaping onto the second rope and spring boarding back with a Thez Press! The babes endure an excruciating plummet towards the floor,and crash with a resounding thud. Despite the searing landing, Mackenzie is all sinful giggles, as Alix's heavy breasts caress her blissful face. Mackenzie exhales a deep moan of pleasure as her face is enfolded in the warm, fabric coated flesh of Alix's perky boobs. Realizing that Alix is in the perfect position to strip Mackenzie bare, Jade returns to the ring and rolls Mackenzie into a opportunistic position. Unfortunately, that position lasts for no more then two seconds, before the champ puts her ring saavy to good use and mounts Mackenzie again. Alix has nary a second to stage any sort of attack on DeCenzo, before The Enterprise's numbers advantage disrupts her offense. Simon (still in Kim Possible panties) journeys to the ring apron, where's he met by a plethora of boos from the inebriated British audience. While he can brush aside the fan's hatred, he can't quite brush aside the super kick Alix uses to terrorize his jaw! Singleton is flung from the ring apron, and his trip through the sky is joined by a rousing ovation from the crowd. “Oh no the bitch did not!” Molly wails, a crazed look of violence distorting her face. As Alix returns her attention towards Mackenzie, Molly hurries up the ring steps and onto the top rope. Her eyes narrowed into slits of sinister determination while she shifts her body to the face the now standing crowd. Unfortunately for Molly, members of that standing crowd have informed Alix of her actions. So it should come as little surprise, when Ally makes a bee line for Molly's position. Her hands coil around the waist of the Nerdly girl's khaki pants, and in one brilliant flourish the clothes rest in a beige heap around her ankles. All that's left in their wake is a shrieking Molly, a hooting crowd, and the cutest, tightest, ass in all of Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. I suppose that may not be saying much, but it's still a cute BUTT. Ever the connoisseur of a fine backside, a giggling Ally gives Molly a playfull swat on the BUTT. Unfortunately this results in Molly being thrust from her nest on the turnbuckles towards the mats bellow. Thankfully for the unpaid intern, her fallen hero and his strange undergarments do an excellent job of breaking her fall. “Whoo-hooo! Everyone sucks but me!” Alix screams. “Oh, and England to!” “YEAAAA!” “Nah, I'm kidding, you whiteboys suck ass!” “BOOOO!” “April fools!” “BOOOO!” “Why are they boooing, Krissy?” “Because it's late July, stupid!” COACH I gotta get me an unpaid intern. I wonder how much one costs. Shrugging her shoulders at Simon's predicament and her inability to decipher the human calendar, Ally returns to fight/molest/be molested/ by Mackenzie. But her opponent continues to move with fantastic barbarity, and seizes on Alix's polo shirt as though they were engaged in a blood thirsty hockey brawl. The pink and white stripes on the shirt strain heavily under Mackie's pull, presenting the audience with their first view of Ally's tight tummy. Mackenzie's bountiful bosoms bounce fabulously with each exertion and pull. Poor Alix is helplessly slung from side to side, her bra coming undone before it even has a chance to to be see daylight. COLE Mackenzie is just going to town on Alix's shirt, and I can't believe it due to a deep desire to become a tag team champion! Al snaps her hands around Mackenzie's wrist, slowing her wild tugging towards a tolerable pull. The thonged cutie uses her strength advantage to pull away her sexually charged foe's hands and capture a bit of much needed freedom. The freedom is short lived, however, as Mackenzie's maniacally resumes her quest to reduce Alix to a state of near nudity. The culinary sensation counters this latest assault, by taking firm grip of the fiery Italian's attacking arm, and driving her downward with a single arm DDT. As the move was utilized more to subdue then hurt, Mackenzie isn't left in an unbearable amount of pain, but she is debilitated enough to grant Alix her sought after break. Having been sufficiently WORN THE FUCK DOWN by Mackenzie, Alix applies a tag to her girlfriend. The observers cheers are earth moving at sight of Krista Isadora Duncan. Unlike Alix, Krista is in perfect shape, and is more then willing to indulge Mackie's curiosities. Her ultra thick California accent comments to Alix, “Guess what we're having for dinner tonight?” “What?” “A little Italian.” She replies, washing Mackenzie with a provocative stare. At Krista's request a production assistant hands her a microphone. “Alright, Back in 99 I had to convince my mother that I was actually straight, which forced me to swap spit with that thing” She points to Ned “for the better part of thirteen months, so maybe my judgment is a little off, but I gotta say Ally, you're a pretty good kisser. But, we're in England...” “YEAAAA!” “And even though as an American I live in constant fear that King George and his red coats are only seconds away from robbing me of my precious freedom and overtaxing my tea, I figure I have to try some new English things. When in London, do what the Londoners do, right? And what do Londoners do? If softcore lesbian pornography on Youtube hasn't lied to me, it's have multiple sex partners. Soooo, Mackenzie, you and Ally looked pretty good competing together, I'm sure you wouldn't mind another competition. How about a kissing contest? And who should be the judge?” COACH Me!!!! Fans, female and male alike, zealously present themselves as possible candidates. COACH Yo, look at that West African bitch in the front row, actin a fool. Probably got that instant aids, stick your tongue in that watch your whole head blow up. Krista proclaims “I know, I'll be the judge! Mackenzie, gimme some sugar.” The invite is far too hard for Mackenzie to resist and soon enough her deep red lips send sparks of pleasure into Krista's bubble gum pink ones. Her lusting tongue gently coaxes her lovers lips to part with a soft moan. Mackie's touch is deliberately slow and sensual, damp where her pink tongue slides over the supple curves of Krista's hungry mouth. Mackie's flashes of touches and teasing tongue lashes, leaves Krista a needy, pleading wreck. One moment Krista feels the blonde delicious licker pleasure her mouth, the next it's slithering out dragging with it a strand of spit that stretches across Krista's glistening lips. Mackenzie leads a lick as nasty as whip, yet infinitely softer over the runaway strand to carry every every last drop of her taste back into Krista's mesmerized mouth. Weakened by the raw sensation of the liplock, Krista can barely herself away. “Um, Alix, your turn!” "ZZZZZ" “You'd be surprised how often that happens.” Krista laments Ned senses that Mackenize is on the verge of fully switching sides, and attempts to win her back by reminding of her how awful life would be without the money of The Enterprise, “Fridays! Olive Garden! Ruby Tuesdays! Dennys! Applebees!” “No! Not Applebees!” “Yes! Applebees!" “APPLEBEES WHORE! APPLEBEES WHORE!” the fans in the front row shout. The thought of having to spend the rest of her days coupon clipping to eat at Applbees, seems enough to motivate DeCenzo to advance the cause of The Enterprise. A saddened apology is heaped upon her makeout partner , before she's forced to resume the devil's handiwork. Her platformed boot flicks forward, slashing Krista's bare stomach, and doubling her over in agony. With Krista momentarily crippled by the strike, Mackenzie grabs hold of her wrist and attempts to toss her into a neutral corner. However, Krista uses her considerable agility to shift the momentum of the move and deposit Mackenzie into the corner. DeCenzo suffers through a harsh collision with the steel posts, but feels nothing but joy as her ocean blue eyes drink in a charging Krista's swinging breasts. However, Mackenzie tempers her arousal, and quickly scampers to the second rope to blast Krista with an axe handle smash as she nears. But, Krista's agility continues to overwhelm her; the fitness queen does handstand atop the second rope and laces her diamond encrusted leggings around Mackenzie's neck! COLE Here's a move we don't see to often from Krista's arsenal! COACH Arsenal? Moves? They need to get Caboose back. A man who wears that much makeup has gots to know a thing or to about bra and panties. While Krista's sparkling noose attempts to annihilate the whimpering DeCenzo with a handspring frankensteiner, her victim exerts a considerable amount of energy to remain upright. Her hands frantically flail through the air, signaling a need for help. Jade moves speedily to answer Mackenzie's emergency call. Covering up her near pointless bra, Jade rushes towards her partner's location where her free hand works as an anchor to hold the platinum blond into place. With Jade attending to her basic need to survive, Mackenzie's insatiable sexual appetite forces itself into the drivers seat. Primal lust flickers into her eyes, as she wastes little time in digging her hands into Krista's pants. Within seconds Krista's humiliation reaches endemic proportions, and she stages a powerful battle to keep her pants around her waist. The audience bestows the thought of Krista's half naked body with an enormous cheer. “If I wasn't hanging upside down by my underwear, I swear to god I would kill you all.” she coldly informs them. Mackenzie's smoldering eyes narrow into a lusting glare, as her ceaseless violation on Krista's modesty rewards her with an up close view of the busty blonde's decadent legs. Fondling Krista's rapidly exposed inner thigh, Mackie marvels at the mesmerizing combination of bronze skin, taut muscles, and glistening flesh. Despite Krista's crazed rebellion, the pants continue to effortlessly sail down her legs. The jumbled wad of leather now acts as a subtle guide, pulling the viewer’s gaze upward over her calves and creamy thighs until it fixates on the delectable helping of ass that squeezes a sparkling black thong. Smiling in unbridled desire over the heavenly beauty that lays before her, Mackenzie fully shreds Krista of the unneeded clothing. The dripping hot beach bunny's million dollar body now rests behind two skimpy pieces of fabric and the audience couldn't be happier. Stock prices of Kleenexx and Vaseline intensive lotion rise 40% as Krista's lingire encased figure leads teenage boys into freshly minted manhood. Krista looks like this COLE Wow! Alix's shirt is the only thing keeping Mackenzie DeCenzo and Jade Rodez from being new tag team champions. Although, I must say Krista's outfit is really more of a bikini then a bra and panties and set. And to me... COACH The hell is wrong with you? I don't care if she's wearing two pieces of bubble wrap! She's hot! Thrilled with their achievement, Jade releases Mackenzie's leg to applaud her efforts. Unfortunately Jade's restraint was the only thing preventing Mackie from getting Frankensteinered half way across the ring. And without Jade's clutches then, well, it's not exactly happy landings for The Enterprise's CFO! Grousing about her misfortune, she begins to scrape her carcass off the canvas, extending her arms towards Jade for a badly needed tag. Problematically, her bikini bound rival utilizes a schoolgirl that pulls her dangerously far away from her corner. But her inability to tag Jade, pales in comparison to the problem of Krista violently yanking her pants away from the slender hips they hug so tightly. While all this is transpiring, the camera wisely focuses on Krista's bronze tush to polish off the older viewers who have tried to withold penile release by using age old techniques of thinking of the usual assortment of unsexy things: Joe Perry, Nolan Ryan, Barbra Bush, I Love Lucy.. it's no use. The thong is all tiny, everything is riding up, her flawless ass all writhy and wriggly and it's Krista's being the gnarliest ,hottest vixen on TV. And if that weren't hot enough, in one fell swoop, Krista glides Mackenzie's pants into a useless puddle of leather on the mat, leaving their former owner a brilliant image of bra and panties majesty. Statuesque long legs that trace a beautiful path to a tight round ass are now fully visible, and the crowd greets them with rousing ovation. For the visually inclined she looks like this: Mackenzie's exposed flesh burns with the fire of embarrassment and arousal. She finds it difficult to concentrate on anything as her sensuous body screams out the new sensations it experiences. COACH Krista getting rid of Mackenzie's dirty laundry, and I wouldn't mind taking both them asses for a spin cycle or two. Though Ned has successfully avoided any confrontation with his child's mother thus far, he realizes he can longer avoid the “baby's mama's drama” , and throws himself into the squared circle. Whether his motivation stemmed from a new found desire to actually be of some use, or stemmed from the fact that said baby's mama is no longer wearing any clothes, the world may never know. My guess is the later! Regardless, The Handsome Hustler enters the ring and seizes hold of Krista with a rear waistlock. Given that her bottom is clothed by what's basically a cocktail napkin with strings, this waistlock is far more pleasurable then usual. Krista fights against his perverse clutches with a round of furious elbow strikes But not even Patton's army could keep the sex crazed Ned from pumping his crotch into her supple bare ass cheeks. Annoyed to no end, Krista rids herself of Ned's unwanted presence by simply rocketing her high heel shoe into his testicles. The second the spiked heel hits him, Blanchard instantly releases Krista, and trembles in crippling pain. He's too dazed to prevent Krista from draping her arm over his shoulder, and can do nothing more then scream in terror as she back flip onto her stomach, forcing him to go airborne with her. Blanchard is deposited into a forward roll, brutally landing on his back at the hands of Everybody hates Kris (back flip rock bottom). The ring ripples beneath the monumental impact of Krista and her mangled adversary. "KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!" One person who isn't so tickled by Krista's dismantling of The Handsome Hustler, is Jade Rodez. As her sports bra continues to fail it's mission to hold her heaving boobs, J-Ro darts towards to Krista with the intention of catching her off guard. But it's Jade who gets caught off guard by Alix, who uses her juicy tush as weapon of (m)ass destruction, knocking Jade off her feet with the world sexiest BUTT bump. "ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!" While the fans and Alix may have discarded Jade to the scrap heap, Simon understands that her pants are the only thing keeping The Enterprise in the tag title hunt. Thus, the world's biggest Kim Possible fan, springboards himself into the ring with an axe handle smash! Ally side steps his oncoming bomb, leaving the six man champ to aimlessly teeter forward. He quickly whirls around to plant Alix with a discus punch. However his strike is delayed by Ally grasping onto his silk dress shirt. In one blink and you miss it motion the fancy garment is torn from his body, leaving behind a....training bra in it's wake? “PUT IT BACK ON! PUT IT BACK ON! PUT IT BACK ON!” the fans demand of the embarrassed six man champ. “Now look, I can expla...” DIAMOND CUTTER!! by Alix. COLE A thirty two year old man, with a jeri curl, kim possible underwear, and a training bra? I wouldn't hit that if I could borrow your penis. Blanchard rampages towards Alix. However, the sultry babe simply leapfrogs his charge. Not dissuaded by the avoidance, The Ned Man simply swings around to retry his murderous attack. This turns into a severe error in judgement, as Alix counters the attack by striding forward, wrapping her arms around his waist, flipping into the air, and liquidizing his skull with the Burning Sensation When You Urinate! (Sunset flip piledriver)! "ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!" COACH I've been feeling a burning sensation all match! But nothing like that. Desperate to acquire some manner of revenge for her earlier humiliation as well as for the drubbing of her employers, the bottomless Molly ascends to the highest turnbuckle. The audience rises to their feet, murmuring in anticipation over the possibility of a high risk assault. Molly doesn't disappoint, and with a feral scream, she launches herself at Alix with a body splash! But she lands across Alix's smooth shoulders in a standing fireman's carry position. As her look morphs from one of defiance to fear, her hands frantically slash at the baby oil glazed skin that keeps her aloft. No luck. Alix lifts her from her shoulders, and drops her stomach first onto her knee. COACH Not fair! You can't treat the unpaid labor like that! Molly's exposed bottom glistens enticingly under the hot arena lights. Cackling with glee, Alix arches back with her right and brings it smartly against her creamy, smooth, alabaster buns. The sound of her palm meeting her warm flesh and scream, more of fright than pain, resounds throughout the arena. The cheeks of her ass rippled beautifully. Ally runs her soft hand over the already reddened buttocks in a soothing motion. Then suddenly she reaches back once more and delivers the next stroke a little harder, over the middle of her ass crease. The loud THWACK reverberates around the arena once more, but this time the little honey remains stoically silent, emitting only a throaty grunt in response to the growing pain.The audience was goes wild- this is well beyond what they had hoped. Alix continues to spank Molly at will, raining down blows. COLE Weren't you saying something about this not being fair? COACH Hey she's not Union, do what you want, Alix! Acting more out of jealously towards Molly then any sense of sisterhood, Mackenzie dives upon Alix, crashing her away from her panting victim. The busty beauties lunge themselves into a monumental battle for dominance. Their silky legs intertwine into a ribbon of golden brown beauty, as their hands feverishly weave through each other's spiraled strands. With flaming desire, they wiggle fervidly in their snarl, legs tangled in a delightfully sensual coil, sharing touch and taste. Finally the pairing dribbles from the ring, spilling onto the outside mats, where the front row audience is given the ultimate feast for the eyes. Back in the squared circle, the contestants have been reduced to Jade and Krista. Thanks to the sudden disappearance of every last one of her allies, Jade's confidence has taken a noise dive into oblivion. COLE Well, if Jade wants to win this match she needs to somehow get to Alix and get at her shirt! Jade is keenly aware of this fact and speedily works to achieve such a task. She grabs hold of the official's arm, and launches him like a missile at the approaching Krista. But the bikined Californian sidesteps the frail referee, and continues her charge towards Jade. J-Ro swings her heel around to blast Krista's pretty face with spinning back kick! However KID catches the incoming shoe and drives it harshly towards the canvas. The rough counter throws Jade off balance, and sends her hot pink coated breasts wobbling across her chest. K-I-D! K-I-D! K-I-D! Jade recovers enough of her strength to lash back at Krista with a sloppy jaw breaker. Though the move is nothing pretty it staggers the blonde bombshell away from her overmatched rival. But that distance quickly evaporates once Jade dives upon Krista with a forearm smash. Yet, KID counters the attack by grasping onto Jade's track pants and lifting her into a flap jack! The crowd popping move causes Jade's neck to be lacerated by the coarse ring cables and she immediately stumbles through a fit of violent coughing. COLE A flapjack onto the ropes is an excellent move to use in this type of match. It's possible it can cut off the breathing of your foe, and as Coach can attest to it's easier to take the clothes off an unconscious woman then a conscious one! Krista seizes on the opportunity Jade's affliction has presented her, and ties her hands around the girls' smooth stomach. The fleeting feel of Krista's soft orbs tickling her flesh, is quickly overshadowed by the horror of the older woman dragging her down with a rollup! Instantly Krista's naughty fingers dig at the remains of the track suit, eliciting a yelp of worry from their wearer. “YAAAAA!” the fans shout in horny anticipation of Jade's panties. Jade sharply kicks free of the hold, throwing herself upright in order to generate distance between herself and her aggressor. Unfortunately her sudden ascent comes conveniently at the same as Ned's sudden ascent, and the two members encounter a head on collision! Though Blanchard is simply pushed into the ropes, the much smaller Jade is gift wrapped to the salivating Krista. With a lighting quick flash of her hands, Krista pries away the fabric lock, and unearths the treasure of Jade's perfect heart shaped BUTT! Away goes the cocoon of clothing, and in comes Jades magnificent splendor of ass. As her firm and muscular BUTT beams proudly on display beneath her animal print panties, the fans let loose a monstrous cheer of approval. Jade's reaction is much less excited then the crowd's. She wails in annoyance and in frustration, unsure of rather she's directing her anger towards Krista, herself, or her near useless “help”. COLE And it is all over, ladies and gentlemen! Chicks Over Dicks have foiled another one of Moneymaker's plots! And that means we will definitely see the Scramble Cage tag match this Thursday! And what a match that will be, history will be made. COACH Who cares about cages and scrambles? We oughta have this type of match every week! COLE Hey, I'm all for D*LUX against The Gunslingers in a bikini briefs match! As Alix joins her in the ring, Krista gingerly launches Jade's pants into the congregation of Orthodox Jewish Lesbian Optometrists gathered in the front row. Realizing that she's the only one still fully clothed Alix decides she doesn't want to be left out of the party. Thus her polo shirt is tossed aside, and viewers are treated to this image: Syndicated ratings plummet as masturbators everywhere change their pants turn in for the night. COLE I don't quite think Mackenzie returned to heterosexual team with this match, but after awhile, she certainly did her part to win the tag titles for The Enterprise. Is it enough to save her job? That's up to Moneymaker. But I will say she did a hell of a lot more then Ned Blanchard! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen the winner and still OAOAST world tag team champions.... CROWD C-O-D! C-O-D! C-O-D! COLE Fans, another fantastic victory for Alix and Krista, their first in a bra and panties match. The OAOAST Syndicated logo flashes across the screen. THE VOICE~! Coming up next...who did Zack Malibu choose as his partner for the "Dream Partner Tag Team Match"? The answer will be revealed in our main event! The OAOAST Syndicated logo flashes across the screen. * COMMERCIAL BREAK *

COLE Welcome back fans. And now, coming up in just a few moments is the 2007 Battlebowl! This should be a good one, folks. Battlebowl qualifying matches were held throughout July. This past Thursday on HeldDOWN, the final four participants in our Battlebowl battle royal were determined in the tag matches, but due to time constraints, those matches did not air on television! Right now, we're going to show you the highlights of those matches, which will complete the field here tonight! *cut to drawings and entrances* TONY SCHIAVONE (voice-over) Our first match featured the Birmingham Bad Boy, Jamie O'Hara, very excited to be drawn into Battlebowl, and here comes his partner, Rico de Janiero, of the Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew, who has a big next few days coming up, with a chance to be an undisputed tag team champion! Their opponents would be first, Jay Richards! Will Saturday night be all right for him? And his partner, a member of the Love Doctors, Dr. Steven Pigley! *cut to highlights* SCHIAVONE It was a terrific high-flying contest, all four guys putting their bodies on the line! *Various speed moves are shown, including O'Hara taking Richards down with a flying headscissors, and Pigley hitting a flying bodypress from the top rope for a two-count.* SCHIAVONE But in the end, it was Jamie O'Hara's night, along with Rico, as he takes down the Doctor and delivers the big CURBSTOMP~! for the 1-2-3, Jamie O'Hara and Rico de Janiero advance to Battlebowl! *cut to more entrances* SCHIAVONE Here he comes, the former X-champion, Reject, one of the final four names drawn for this Battlebowl, and his partner, Sweet Luscious Soul, the other half of the Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew! Their opponents would be the powerful duo of Biff Atlas, and his partner, "The Current Big Thing", former Heartland champion Brock Ausstin! Lot of prestige in this matchup! *more highlights* SCHIAVONE It did not look good for Soul, as Brock Ausstin really did a number on him late, but intervention from the outside would be the determining factor in this one, as here comes Rico down the aisle, pulling his partner to the outside! That distracts the referee, and now here come Reject's running buddies, the Burrough Boys, and they attack Brock Ausstin! The battle spills to the outside, leaving Reject in the ring along with the distracted Biff, spinning him around, and there it is, the EULOGY~! Brock able to fight off the odds, but by that time it's too late, as the three count is made, and Reject and Sweet Luscious Soul round out the field for the battle royal! *cut back to Sofa Central* COLE Thanks, Tony, real quick, let's run down the field for later tonight, Coach, we've got Felix Strutter, Team Heyross, Jumbo, Deuce Deuce Bigelow, Denzel Spencer, Chris Stevens, Vinny Valentine, Reject, The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew, Jamie O'Hara, Thunderkid, Waldo of the Burrough Boys, Conquistador Uno, and MISTER Warrior! Thoughts, Coach? COACH It's interesting, Cole, with this big tag team unification match coming up on HeldDOWN this week, you've got both members of Team Heyross in this thing, as well as both members of the Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew through the tag matches! It could be a big, big week for one of those four guys! COLE Yes, indeed it could! There you have it, folks, that's what you'll be seeing tonight in our Battlebowl battle royal, and of course the winner will take on Alfdogg at AngleSlam for the WDW World title! Let's now go up to Michael Buffer! *DING DING DING* (slow and dramatic) BUFFER LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLadies and gentlemen, it is now time for our 16-man Battlebowl battle royal! Tonight, 16 of the finest superstars in the wrestling world do battle in one match! Elimination occurs when a wrestler is thrown over the top rope, and both feet touch the floor! The last man standing will be declared the winner, and will go on to AngleSlam for a shot at the WDW World heavyweight championship! *crowd cheers* And now, let's meet the participants. *generic music hits, as the combatants come through the curtains.* "After Hours" Felix Strutter! *crowd boos* Denzel Spencer! *crowd boos* Charlie Moss! *crowd boos* Quentin Benjamin! *crowd boos* Jumbo! *crowd cheers* Deuce Deuce Bigelow! *crowd cheers* "Disco Duck" Vinny Valentine! *crowd boos* "Sensational" Chris Stevens! *crowd boos* "The Birmingham Bad Boy" Jamie O'Hara! *crowd cheers* Rico de Janiero! *crowd boos* "Sweet" Luscious Soul! *crowd boos* Reject! *crowd boos* Thunderkid! *crowd cheers* representing the Burrough Boys, Waldo! *crowd boos* Conquistador Uno! *mixed reaction* and MISTER Warrior! *crowd cheers, but Warrior does not come through the curtains.* COACH Okay, where is that goof? COLE Who knows? Black Sweat hits, and MISTER Warrior runs down the aisle and does a lap around the ring, then jumps on the apron and pumps his fists in the air. He steps through the ropes and the bell rings. *DING DING DING* COACH Here we go! COLE The battle royal is under way! MISTER Warrior backs into the ropes, and floors Rico with a clothesline! He then runs over and knocks Stevens to the mat with one! He stops to pound on his chest, and is ambushed by several men. COLE And now, they've got to settle this guy down! However, MISTER Warrior gets the head shaking and starts blindly chopping away at various wrestlers, then delivers a big clothesline to Uno, sending him over the top to the floor! COLE We've got our first elimination! Uno is gone! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1st elimination: Conquistador Uno eliminated: none eliminated by: MISTER Warrior ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MISTER Warrior stops to pump his fists, which allows Team Heyross to sneak up from behind and lift him over the top rope! COACH But the idiot Warrior was too worried about posing, and now he'll have to take his Destructicity to the showers! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 2nd elimination: MISTER Warrior eliminated: Conquistador Uno eliminated by: Charlie Moss, Quentin Benjamin ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MISTER Warrior lands on his feet while holding the top rope, and climbs back into the ring. COACH Now what? MISTER Warrior floors Benjamin with a big clothesline! He then bounces off two ropes, and drills Moss with one, as well! He then pumps his fists in the air and pounds his chest, as Black Sweat hits once again and he jumps out of the ring and runs to the back with his arms raised in the air. COLE He's a piece of work, MISTER Warrior, but he won't be going to AngleSlam! As the match settles down to a normal environment, Team Heyross doubles up on Thunderkid, while Valentine goes to work on Jamie O'Hara. Soul and Rico then come over to indirectly give TK a hand. COACH And here we go already, it's the Homewrecking crew against Team Heyross! Waldo hammers away on Jamie O'Hara on the ropes, then backs up for a clothesline, but O'Hara ducks and backdrops Waldo to the floor! COLE And Waldo, the Burrough Boy eliminated! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 3rd elimination: Waldo eliminated: none eliminated by: Jamie O'Hara ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chris Stevens and Denzel Spencer slug it out on the ropes, with Stevens winning the exchange, then scooping up Spencer, but Spencer slides behind the back and scoops up Stevens! COLE And Chris Stevens in trouble! However, Reject comes from behind and dumps both men to the floor! COACH The ranks thinning out quickly in this one, Cole! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 4th elimination: Chris Stevens eliminated: none eliminated by: Reject ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 5th elimination: Denzel Spencer eliminated: none eliminated by: Reject ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Reject celebrates, then quickly ducks as Rico charges him and backdrops him to the floor! COLE And there goes another one! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 6th elimination: Rico de Janiero eliminated: none eliminated by: Reject ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COACH Reject is on fire! COLE Could it be Reject who goes to AngleSlam against Alfdogg, remember last year he almost won the World Heavyweight title in two terrific matches against Alf! Jumbo works over Valentine, then holds him for Deuce. Deuce backs into the ropes, and goes for a clothesline...but Valentine slips away, and Jumbo takes it! COACH Big clothesline, but he hit his partner! Jumbo stumbles backwards, and falls right over the top and to the floor! COLE And he's out! The biggest man in the match, Jumbo eliminated! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 7th elimination: Jumbo eliminated: none eliminated by: Deuce Deuce Bigelow ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Deuce leans over the ropes to check on Jumbo, Vinny hits a dropkick from behind, sending him over them to the floor! COACH And there goes the second biggest man! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 8th elimination: Deuce Deuce Bigelow eliminated: Jumbo eliminated by: Vinny Valentine ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Valentine does a dance to celebrate, but runs right into a BIG right hand from TK, which staggers him back into the corner! TK then brings him out and picks him up in a PRESS SLAM~!, tossing him out onto Jumbo and Deuce! COLE And there goes Vinny! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 9th elimination: Vinny Valentine eliminated: Deuce Deuce Bigelow eliminated by: Thunderkid ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Cut back to a wideshot, where Team Heyross works over Soul tosses him to the floor! COLE And Soul hits the showers! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 10th elimination: Sweet Luscious Soul eliminated: none eliminated by: Charlie Moss, Quentin Benjamin ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COACH And just like that, we're down to six men! COLE We've got Thunderkid and Reject, the former tag team partners, we've got Jamie O'Hara, we've got Felix Strutter, and we've got the two members of Team Heyross! COACH They've worked well together in this one, and it could be one of them going on to face Alf! Strutter huddles up with Team Heyross, as the other three men stand alone. After a brief discussion, the three men separate, then spread out. Reject attacks O'Hara, and Strutter joins in on the attack, as TK attempts to fight off Moss and Benjamin. Eventually, he succumbs to the odds, and Team Heyross sets him up against the ropes, while Reject and Strutter do the same to O'Hara. COLE Looks like they're setting up for a mid-ring collision! TK and O'Hara are whipped across the ring into one another, and both men crash into the mat! COACH It's not looking good for these two, Cole! Team Heyross grabs O'Hara and attempts to dump him, as Reject and Strutter attempt to do the same to TK. COLE It certainly is not, as they're now in jeopardy of being eliminated! TK and O'Hara both slide back in under the bottom rope, but are stomped away on. They then set up another Irish whip. COLE Another whip being set up here... This time, however, O'Hara jumps at TK in hurricanrana fashion, and TK sends him over with the momentum, with O'Hara coming down with a double clothesline on Reject and Strutter! TK then floors Team Heyross with a double clothesline! COLE And the tide has turned in this battle royal! TK grabs Moss and attempts to dump him, but Benjamin catches him with a superkick from behind, sending him over the top to the apron! COACH Whoa, TK almost out there! Moss slides back in, and Team Heyross charges at TK, but TK drops down and pulls down the rope, causing both men to spill over, and Benjamin goes to the floor! COLE Nice move by TK, and Quentin Benjamin gone! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 11th elimination: Quentin Benjamin eliminated: MISTER Warrior, Sweet Luscious Soul eliminated by: Thunderkid ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TK slugs it out with Moss on the apron, then Strutter attempts a springboard dropkick, but TK ducks, and Moss takes it, dropping him to the floor! COACH Oh, no! COLE And inadvertently, Felix Strutter knocking Charlie Moss out of action! Team Heyross is gone, we're down to four! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 12th elimination: Charlie Moss eliminated: MISTER Warrior, Sweet Luscious Soul eliminated by: Felix Strutter ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ FINAL FOUR: Felix Strutter, Jamie O'Hara, Reject, Thunderkid COLE One of these four men will get a shot at the WDW World title at AngleSlam! All four men back off into a corner briefly, then Strutter goes after O'Hara, while Reject and TK go at it. Reject dumps TK to the apron, then goes over and hammers O'Hara from behind. Strutter and Reject whip O'Hara into the ropes, but O'Hara ducks a double clothesline and knocks both men down with a double dropkick! COLE Double dropkick, one foot into each man! O'Hara is PUMPED~ as he goes to dump Reject, but Strutter gets him from behind and drills him with a European uppercut. Strutter then charges O'Hara, but O'Hara ducks, and backdrops Strutter over! COLE So close to being out! Strutter hangs onto the top rope, then sits on the apron and grabs O'Hara by his vest, pulling him backwards over the top rope! COLE But no, it's O'Hara that goes out! What a move by Strutter, his feet did NOT touch the floor! We're down to three! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 13th elimination: Jamie O'Hara eliminated: Waldo eliminated by: Felix Strutter ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Strutter skins the cat back in, as O'Hara slaps the mat angrily. Strutter and Reject double team TK, as Reject holds TK back, and Strutter backs into the ropes. See if you can guess what happens next: A. TK slips out of the way B. Strutter nails Reject inadvertently C. The crowd goes wild D. All of the above If you guessed D, you were correct, as Reject is on the receiving end of a spinning wheel kick! COLE And Reject takes it instead! TK hammers away on Strutter, as the crowd goes wild! COACH And what a rivalry between these guys, Cole! COLE Strutter the WDW Heartland champion, while TK holds that honor for the OAOAST! TK whips Strutter into the ropes, and catches him with a BICYCLE KICK~! COLE Big move by TK, and he's going for it right here! TK sets up for the THUNDERBOLT DDT~!!!!!11111, but Strutter drops to his knees and delivers a low blow! COLE But Strutter goes downstairs, and that's legal in this match! Strutter measures TK, and climbs up onto his shoulders in the electric chair position! COLE And Strutter setting up something here, but TK blocking it! Suddenly, Reject gets to his feet, comes from behind... COACH Look at this, Cole! ...and DUMPS BOTH MEN TO THE FLOOR! COACH YES~! COLE It's all over, Reject wins it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 14th elimination: Felix Strutter eliminated: Charlie Moss, Jamie O'Hara eliminated by: Reject ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 15th elimination: Thunderkid eliminated: Vinny Valentine, Quentin Benjamin eliminated by: Reject ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ******************************************************************************** * WINNER: Reject eliminated: Denzel Spencer, Chris Stevens, Sweet Luscious Soul, Felix Strutter, Thunderkid ******************************************************************************** * *DING DING DING* BUFFER The winner of the battle royal...RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREJECT!!!!! COLE Excellent showing by Reject, and he will go on to AngleSlam to challenge Alfdogg! Reject is showered with boos as he does the belt pose on the buckles. COACH Alf and Reject will write another chapter in the Deadly Alliance story at AngleSlam, for the WDW World title! COLE Yes indeed, Reject wins this battle royal, he is the 2007 Battlebowl champion! Alfdogg vs. Reject will happen once again, this time for the WDW World title, at AngleSlam! The OAOAST Syndicated logo flashes across the screen. THE VOICE~! Coming up next...get the lotion ready. Tag Team Bra And Panties Match for the OAOAST World Tag Team Titles! The OAOAST Syndicated logo flashes across the screen. IT IS THE BIGGEST MAIN EVENT IN ANGLESLAM HISTORY. ZACK MALIBU. "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION" THA PUERTO RICAN. LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" MADDIX. ALL THREE MEN WILL COLLIDE FOR THE ONE AND ONLY ANGLESAULT THREAD WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP. AND IT WILL HAPPEN LIVE IN MADISON SQUARE GARDEN. GET ONE LAST JOLT OUT OF YOUR SUMMER. ORDER OAOAST ANGLESLAM 2007 TO SEE A MATCH THAT WILL BE TALKED ABOUT FOR YEARS TO COME. LANDON "LA CUCARACHA" MADDIX VS. ZACK MALIBU VS. "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION" THA PUERTO RICAN IN A TRIPLE THREAT MATCH FOR THE OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP. IT WILL HAPPEN AT OAOAST ANGLESLAM! SUNDAY AUGUST 26TH AT 8:00 P.M. EST/5:00 P.M. PST LIVE ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW! CALL YOUR LOCAL CABLE OR SATELITE OPERATOR TO ORDER NOW! *COMMERCIAL BREAK*