Giuseppe Zangara

Once, some years back, I was seeing a movie I wasn't enjoying (can't recall what it was). This teenager in front of me wouldn't shut up, so, seeing how I was bored—and her yakking wasn't distracting me from anything—I began periodically kicking the back of her chair. Each kick would shut her up for a moment, but she never stopped the flow of inane chatter, nor did she turn around and say something to me. After the movie was over, I was walking out, with her right behind me, when she said to one of her friends that yeah, the movie was okay, but this guy—I couldn't see her but I could tell she meant me—was being an asshole. So I turned around and told her that hey, given you wouldn't shut the fuck up for most of the movie, you now know what it must've felt like for the people who might've been enjoying themselves. She had no response.

Also, maintain eye contact while addressing them. Be firm; lets them know you're serious.

I always just get up, walk to the source of the noise and ask them—without yelling but still loud enough for most of the theater to here—"WOULD YOU PLEASE STOP TALKING?" Doesn't always work the first time, but will the second time. Back when I shaved my head, my appearence was enough to never require a second time.

Generally, I don't like downloading an album prior to its release, but there's David Pajo's new one, nearly two months before its street date, being downloaded right now. Fuck, I can't wait to listen to it. And buy it late June, natch. Incidentally, I wish he kept the Papa M moniker, but whatta ya gonna do.

and then

Other than her clothes, her face is looking a little rough. I'd still pork the fetus out of her.

I'd grab those thighs.

I hate that feeling where, after a long night of non-drinking, you get home expecting some nice, cold brews in your fridge, only to realize you have no beer because you ran out of it last night; plus, you can't buy alcohol after 2am, which is 15 minutes away. You'd go to the local gas station, but the closest one that's still open is a good six, seven minute drive. It wouldn't be a problem, that, but you've already removed all your clothing save your boxers and you just can't be troubled to put anything back on, even the slightly foul-smelling sweats that've been sitting in a pile on your bedroom floor for almost as long as you've lived there. So you sit in front of your computer, posting on a message board about how much you'd like a beer right now.

Too many turds in pop country, it's true. That whole genre is the worst. I think Agent may be right with "All Star."

Hey, maybe she already has all the other albums and just wanted PH to round out her collection. I myself have never owned Pablo Honey, nor shall I ever.

I'd still bone her, how horrible. She could even keep on whatever the hell it is she's wearing AND those boots while "Creep" played on a continuous loop.

Britney Spears, dude.

What's worse: her outfit or Pablo Honey?

None stick out.

I need to know soon, as I've been ignoring her for the past couple of hours, hoping she just kinda forgets about the whole thing.

Czech im'ed me while I was away. He started his message with "this is The Czech Republic," which prompted my girlfriend—who saw the message first—to ask "Who is The Czech Republic?" What should I say.

Sorrow is the key that frees our tears from eye jail.

Hey, if you go here and click on "Check this out." under the 2005.04.18 - New Feature! heading, you can listen to a stream of my show from this past Sunday.

Jeff's board was called Wrestlechat. An attempt to invade it went nowhere; it was just that sad.

I usually don't like receiving mixes (I enjoy giving them, though), especially if it's from a girl. Holy shit, they have awful taste.

It's a good album, but none of the rest of Blue Cathedral sounds like that.

I can't stand the Slits. Just some girls with no sense of rhythm trying to play dub. Feh. Anyway, I'm being frugal with my money, so I can't buy anything anytime soon. So I'm just gonna post a list of the next five albums I want to buy: 1. LCD Soundsystem - s/t (I decided I like this enough to want to legally acquire it.) 2. Stars of the Lid - The Ballastrated Orchestra 3. Elvis Costello - Rhino's King of America reissue. I have the original Columbia release on vinyl, so I'd like to upgrade. 4. Black Dice - Creature Comforts 5. Something by Sunn O)))

Though I've had both albums for awhile, Brian Eno's Taking Tiger Mountain (By Strategy) and Camper Van Beethoven's Key Lime Pie have really been clicking with me, lately. From the former, "The True Wheel" and the last two minutes of "Mother Whale Eyeless" are as close to perfect as anything can get. From the latter, "All Her Favorite Fruit" is one of those songs that just make me love music.

Here's the tracklist: 01. Wilco - California Stars 02. The Shins - The Celibate Life 03. Dinosaur Jr. - Sludgefeast 04. Tortoise - A Simple Way to Go Faster Than Light That Does Not Work 05. Comets On Fire - Pussy Foot the Duke 06. The Birthday Party - A Dead Song 07. Brutal Juice - Cannibal Holocaust 08. Sunn O))) - My Wall 09. Echo and the Bunnymen - A Promise 10. Super Furry Animals - The Man Don't Give a Fuck 11. Beat Happening - Me Untamed 12. Talking Heads - Slippery People 13. The Delgados - Witness 14. Basehead - Brand New Day 15. D'Angelo - Shit, Damn, Motherfucker 16. Black Star - Hater Players 17. Refused - The Shape of Punk to Come 18. Black Dice - Things'll Never Be the Same 19. Neurosis - Through Silver In Blood As for the Napolean Dynamite thing, I don't get it. His voice his far huskier than mine. Plus, I completely lack his vocal inflections.

You got as far as the Super Furry Animals song? Cool, 'cuz I was worried when the stream cut out at 49 minutes. Guess it was only on my end. And John Kreese, that is me, but that picture is a year-and-a-half old. I currently have a full head of hair and no beard.