Hank Kingsley

Friday, August 12, 2061 I'll be 73~

Thank God. Excellent, excellent news.

Greatest opening match ever.

Calvin's promos saved this show.

OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH SAAAAAAAY CAN YOU SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I concur.

Go fuck a milk jug, Duran!! It's painfully obvious that two men would beat one at anytime. As for the music, well... ...I'll get back to you on that.

~Double Jeopardy is pushed (moreso, anyway!) because of their excellent choice in theme music.

Finally~ Strangler, sweet ass. Again.

What the fuck? How is Gary Coleman worse than Gray Davis? I mean, come on.

Oh my god. The SWF's greatest asset ever retires. With the greatest promo ever. You are the man, Thoth, and words can't describe what the SWF will do without Good Ol' Anal Blitzkrieg. I cry.

Oh, Stevie, you're so sweet~

Hell yes bitches~

I feel really bad about not being able to comment on what looks like a hell of a PPV, but with school starting the day after, really, the only thing I had time to do was see if we won (And, by the way, we did) on Monday Morning before I went to school. I'm looking forward to reading the whole thing this weekend, though.

Atlast! Atlas is a legal citizen~! Happy Birthday~

It's spreading~

EDIT: Finally revamped post-US Title win, 6/26 Smarks Board Name: The Superstar Wrestlers Name: The Masked Man Nicknames: TMM, Masked Fury, Sexual Maskosaurus Height: 5'11" Weight: 243 lbs. Hometown: Craiova, Romania (currently resides in Orofino, Idaho) Age: 26 Face/Heel: Heel~ Stable: None Ring Escort: None Weapon(s): Nothing in particular Quotes: "That which can not be shall not be, unless he that doth seek it fufill his conquest with pure, glimmering courage and hope." "The great penis of charisma hath ejaculated its load unto me." Looks: A white European, slight muscular definition in his upper body. His ring attire is a suit, at least, that's what he wears to the ring. He usually removes the coat, leaving him in a dress shirt, tie, and slacks, a nondescript mask (like a ski mask, except professionally done). The jacket, tie, slacks, and shoes are black, while the shirt is white. The shirt usually has the sleeves torn off, giving him that BAD ASS~ look. For his ring entrance, Masked Man carries a briefcase (to continue the Pulp vibe). What's in it? Who's it for? What's the combination? Only Masked Man knows~ Ring Entrance: The arena's house lights go into strobe mode, and "Misirlou" by Dick Dale and his Del-Tones (from the credit sequence of "Pulp Fiction") rocks the speakers! Masked Man enters the arena to a negative reaction. He calmly walks to the ring, straightening his tie with one hand and holding onto the briefcase with the other. He places his briefcase in a safe place (next to the ring steps, usually), and then jogs up the steps and slingshots over the top rope into the ring. From there, he leaps onto the second rope of one of the corners and removes his jacket, throwing it onto the ground and doing a pose before jumping down and warming up for the match. Stats: ¯¯¯¯¯ Strength: 5 [he's built, but not freakishly strong. he can suplex anyone under 300 pounds, although even the 280+ range is pushing it. The maximum for other lifting moves is probably around 300. ] Speed: 3 [he can be pretty quick if he wants to, but TMM really doesn't rely on speed to win the day. He's just there to FIGHT~] Vitality: 5 [will go down to a finisher. He's pretty tough, but nothing extraordinary. Can go through a long match before getting really winded.] Charisma: 7 [just read his second quote. Really, how can you not love a guy who calls himself the Sexual Maskosaurus?] Style: Middleweight. Basically, the Sexual Maskosaurus wrestles in a brawling style usually seen on WWE TV. He's a good wrestler, but not an over-the-top extravagant purohead. He tends to focus on the head/neck of the opponent, to set up the Cautionary Tale of Sexual Maskosaurus finisher. If it's a bigger/stronger opponent that's tougher to put down, Mask will usually resort to fast strikes to try and keep the opponent off of their game. Signature moves: "Lineage" - Arm-wrench neckbreaker (Regal's Union Jack). If you haven't seen it, TMM wraps his opponent's own arm around their throat, holds onto their hand, and leaps forward, wrenching their neck in the process. This move is named as such because, according to legend, Masked Man's great grandfather, famous Eastern European wrestler Muztev Nyiregyháza, used it to defeat archrival Ho Min-Chou Ahn at The Battle in Manchuria during the first World War. "Cyclone Complex" - Tornado DDT. And yes, feel free to have Comet mark out over it on commentary if you'd like. "Blood Money" - A combination move; First, TMM executes Christian's reverse-DDT backbreaker move, holds onto his opponent's head and brings him back up, and then executes a swift falling neckbreaker. Sometimes he does the two moves separately, but he prefers doing them together. "Maski Pad" - A reverse half-nelson STO, perfected by Judge Mental. Used to stop an opponent's momentum in most cases. "Romanian Suplex" - German Suplex. Neither bridged nor released, Mask just holds onto the waistlock until the move is completed, and then lets go. This isn't a "DEADLY NECK BUMP DROP OF DOOOOM", but it's pretty powerful. Missile Dropkick, Flying Clothesline - Masked Man doesn't take it to the air too often, but when he does, it's to execute one of these moves (excluding the rare moves). La Magistral - a commonly used, surprise pinning move used by Masked Man. Snake Eyes - Masked Man commonly uses this to stun an opponent silly. Common moves: Rock-like punches Corner kicks (abdomen, legs, and occasionally head) Knife-edge chops Back suplex (not a head/neck bump, just the upper back) Snap suplex Bulldog headlock Facebuster (X-Pac's X-Factor, sit-out face slam into the mat) Enzuiguri DDT Monkey flip (similarly, if Masked Man is monkey flipped by an opponent, he will almost ALWAYS land on his feet, unless he's fatigued) Russian leg sweep Swinging Neckbreaker (usually used as a counter) Baseball slide schoolboy (Mask baseball slides under the opponent's legs and reaches up, pulling them over in a schoolboy) Wear-down holds that focus on the neck (chinlock, front facelock, etc.) Rare moves: Superfly Splash - This is one of those "top rope exception" things. Probably not enough to finish off an opponent anyway, but it's flashy. "Ezekiel 25:17" - STF with a full nelson. One of the rarest, since he's not exactly a submission expert. However, He will use this move occasionally to wear down an opponent's head/neck. Again, if he can't lift them up for the Cautionary Tale, he may resort to this to cause more head and neck pain. "Suruasoksam Lauxes fo Elat Yranoituac Eht" - A reverse, inverted Cautionary Tale of Sexual Maskosaurus (clever, huh?). Masked Man executes the same forward fall brainbuster, but from behind with an inverted facelock. Any of "Judge" William Hearford's rare and finishing moves, besides the Suprise Witness (see below). TMM was taught by this man, so he's taking after him (but not very often). Obviously, if you get hit with one of these, it's a three count/submission. Finishers: Impact I - "The Cautionary Tale of Sexual Maskosaurus" - A forward fall brainbuster. TMM picks his opponent up for a regular brainbuster, but instead of falling backwards, he drops onto his stomach, spiking his opponent's head into the canvas. Ouch. Impact II - "The Masked Avenger" - Diamond Cutter/Judge Mental's Surprise Witness. Originally a rare move, Masked Man has perfected his sensai's style of this neckbreaker and decided to make it his own. This move is usually only hit out of desperation, or if TMM can't lift his opponent up for the Cautionary Tale. Notes: *Trained by Judge Mental, so if you need other ideas for moves not listed, his stats are two up from this post. *Unlike his trainer, he rarely cheats. This isn't an uptight rule or anything, but Masked Man is confident enough in his abilities to find no need for cheating. Except for low blows. Because low blows are awesome. Bio: A man in a mask. Title History SWF United States Championship - 6/23/04 - Defeated champion Alan Clark in a fatal four-way match involving Clark, Aecas, and Todd Cortez.

...I wish I had known about this earlier. I've been getting the RPC Countdown for almost a week, and hadn't thought anything of it. Now that I know it's a virus, my computer could be seriously fucked. I used the patch...and while the countdown is gone, my mouse, while connected, doesn't work, and it's the same with my internet.

Oh god. School and a virus to deal with. BOO!

I'm lucky I have an extra computer, because this infected mine, too. ARGH~

Survey Says: OH MY FUCKING GOD

Freaky Friday hit #2? How in the fuck?

Oh my god. This IS fantastic.

Hey, it's Quiz, that writing hoss. I sent him 5k and he went and finished the whole thing after we had (well, I had, at least) been struggling through it. Damn that stipulation to hell~

8527 words later, Double Jeopardy's MATCH IS IN~!

OMG I AM SOOOOOOOOOO SORRY! Do you want anything, a shoulder to lean on, or something? I'm here for you.