Phoenix Fury Legdrop

::The camera cuts back to the bridge. Tha Puerto Rican paces across the bridge, jumping up and down, looking at his watch. He is becoming a little impatient as he looks at the highway.:: MC: It seems as though that The Mad Cappa has yet to make his appearance. Caboose: Did Cappa’s car stall or something? Where the hell is the annoying brat? Coachman: P.R. has been waiting for the past 30-45 minutes. Caboose: Cappa probably got lost along the way. Tha Puerto Rican: Where is he? I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO bored right now. ::Suddenly, a black Porsche pulls to the bridge. It comes screeching next to Tha Puerto Rican. The Mad Cappa comes out from the car and rushes towards Tha Puerto Rican. P.R. sneers and motions for Cappa to come fight him. The crowd cheers loudly. Cappa is furious and yells out “Son-of-a-bitch!”:: Michael Cole: And here we go! ::The Mad Cappa and Tha Puerto Rican fight on the bridge with the crowd cheering the entire time. P.R. and Cappa trade left and rights with neither man getting the advantage.:: Coachman: P.R. and Cappa are tearing into each other right now! Caboose: They’re giving us a preview of their Rematch at The Year of Living Anglelously where Tha Puerto Rican will defeat The Mad Cappa! P.R. gains the advantage causing the crowd to boo. But The Mad Cappa fires back and lays into P.R. with lefts and rights causing the crowd to cheer.:: MC: And now The Mad Cappa is taking P.R. to the edge of the bridge! Caboose: Come on, P.R.! Fight back! ::The Mad Cappa continues his attack, punching P.R. closer and closer to the edge of the bridge. P.R. yells out “NOW! NOW! NOW! NOW!” causing The Lightning Crew to appear. The Lightning Crew gather on The Mad Cappa causing the crowd to boo loudly. The Mad Cappa gets beat up by The Lightning Crew, allowing Tha Puerto Rican to escape. The Lightning Crew take turns beating down on The Mad Cappa.:: MC: Now come on! This is not fair! This is not fair at all! Caboose: It was a trap! It was a trap all along! Tha Puerto Rican set this up from the beginning! It was all a plan! The Lightning Crew were waiting in the wings to attack! They were at the bridge! It was a coordinated attack! P.R.’s plan came into fruition! Brilliance! Sheer, utter brilliance! Coachman: The Lightning Crew set up this attack, but the important thing is that P.R. and The Mad Cappa will meet one more time at The Year of Living Anglelously on April 25th with Colombian Heat as the special referee. And Tha Puerto Rican threw the Puerto Rican Championship over a bridge into a river! MC: The Lightning Crew are now taking turns beating on The Mad Cappa! ::Tha Puerto Rican gives Cappa a P.R. Nightmare on the concrete. Colombian Heat then grabs Cappa and gives him the Colombian Necktie. Mr. Boricua clutches Cappa’s neck, and gives him a Lightning Crew Bomb. Vitamin X then applies the Lethal Injection. Spanish Fly follows with the Unprettier. Thomas Rodriguez lowblows Cappa. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez slaps The Mad Cappa. Finally, Cuban Wall does The Lightning Crew Splash onto The Mad Cappa’s body, causing him to scream in pain. P.R. laughs evilly and spits in Cappa’s face. He sneers at him and blows snot in his face.:: Tha Puerto Rican: Pick him up! ::The Lightning Crew pick up the dazed, dizzy, and in pain Mad Cappa and drag him towards the edge of the bridge. The crowd boos loudly and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” while The Lightning Crew laugh evilly. The Lightning Crew wave goodbye to Cappa as Mr. Boricua and Tha Puerto Rican shove him over the barrier of the bridge. Cappa struggles to hold on, clinging to the barrier with his fingers. But, Tha Puerto Rican punches Mad Cappa in the face several times, screaming in pain. The Mad Cappa is barely hanging on when P.R. grabs his head and slaps him in the face.:: Tha Puerto Rican: You go to hell! You go to hell and you die!!! ::Tha Puerto Rican flips Mad Cappa the middle finger and punches him in the face. The Mad Cappa loses his grip and falls off the bridge into the water.:: Michael Cole: OH MY GOD!!!! Coachman: WHAT THE HELL DID THA PUERTO RICAN DO?!!! Caboose: He just threw The Mad Cappa off that bridge, just like he did to the Puerto Rican Championship! MC: That was a giant fall! That bridge was 30-40 feet above water! We do not see The Mad Cappa anywhere! He has disappeared! Caboose: Hopefully for good. MC: How can you say such a thing? Caboose: Because I’m Caboose, that’s why! Coachman: The Lightning Crew have just thrown Cappa in that river! We didn’t know if P.R. and Mad Cappa would fight for the Puerto Rican Championship at Living Anglelously. Now we don’t know if there will even be a match at The Year of Living Anglelously on April 25th! As Jim Ross would say “BAWD GAWD~!” MC: What a scene we just saw! The Mad Cappa has just been thrown into a river! The Lightning Crew has thrown the Mad Cappa off a bridge! What other craziness will we see tonight? ::The crowd is silent. There is an eery mood as Tha Puerto Rican looks at the river and smiles. He laughs evilly since he does not see The Mad Cappa in the river. Tha Puerto Rican smiles evilly with his Lightning Crew and then grabs the black duffel bag. He opens it…and pulls out the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt. He places it over his left shoulder and sports an evil grin. The crowd is shocked.:: MC: WHAT? P.R. has the Puerto Rican Championship! But how? He threw it into the river! Caboose: Cole, you idiot! That belt P.R. threw was obviously a replica! THAT belt is the real thing. It was brilliant. It was all apart of the plan. P.R. had a fake belt already made BEFORE tonight’s HeldDOWN~! So, he stole the real belt. Put it in a duffel bag. He threatened to throw the fake belt into the river, but not before humiliating The Mad Cappa on national television and forcing him to have a match with him at Living Anglelously with his best friend as the special referee. P.R. threw the fake belt into the river. Which caused Cappa to go after P.R. Which caused The Lightning Crew to attack Cappa. Which caused Cappa to be thrown off the bridge into the river. It couldn’t have been more planned out perfectly! In one plan, Tha Puerto Rican has rid himself of The Mad Cappa once and for all, and has the Puerto Rican Championship belt back. P.R. is on a roll! MC: It was a master plan executed by The Lightning Crew tonight. Caboose: Pure genius. I love it! MC: Is there even going to be a match at The Year of Living Anglelously? The match IS scheduled. But, will The Mad Cappa make it? Will The Mad Cappa even be…alive? Caboose: Let’s all pray to all the gods that may exist that he is not breathing. That would make the situation even better. Coachman: You are a cold, soulless, heartless human being. Caboose: And you are a gay, stupid psychotic, obsessive, horny, pervert. Welcome to the club. Michael Cole: What could possibly happen next? Jonathon “The Coach” Coachman: This feud has taken an interesting turn to say the least. Michael Cole: Is The Mad Cappa even…alive? Colombian Heat: Good job, man! Cuban Wall: Way to go! Way to go! Mr. Boricua: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! Thomas Rodriguez: Excellent plan, P.R. Vitamin X: That was perfect. Spanish Fly: Way to go. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez: That’s my man! ::Tha Puerto Rican laughs evilly, catching his breath. He looks at the Puerto Rican Championship belt, then at the crowd. P.R. turns to the crowd.:: Tha Puerto Rican: Did you seriously think I was actually going to throw the Puerto Rican Championship belt into a river? You are bigger idiots then I thought! HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAAAAAAAA!!! Let’s go. ::Tha Puerto Rican sneers at the camera and walks away. The Lightning Crew follows, as there is now silence. The camera pans to the bridge. There is silence. The last shot is of the bridge with P.R.’s evil laugh heard.:: ::FADE OUT:: ::COMMERCIALS::

*The OU Fight Song plays over the arena's speakers as the fans stand up and cheer. Ryan Smith exits the backstage area and heads to the ramp slapping some fans hands on his way down.* COACH Here's Ryan Smith.....fresh off a loss last week. COLE Yeah a loss to Mr. Boricua after copious interference from The Cuban Wall. CABOOSE I think he's finally realized what we warned him about the Lightening Crew. *Ryan Smith enters the ring and quickly grabs a microphone. He has a look of intensity on his face as he begins to speak.* RYAN So the Ligthening Crew has come to Helddown! Who gives a damn? See you guys seem to have an over inflated since of who you are and how much you matter to me. Cuban Wall you couldn't stand the fact that someone was better than you! That someone pinned your tubby ass in the middle of this ring! So you stuck your nose in my business last week. Well I don't like that. There's two things that matter to me. Beating Damaramu over and over again! And winning the World title. Now I don't see Cuban Wall anywhere in those plans. Nor do I see the Lightening Crew in those plans. So Wall what I'm proposing is to get you out of my plans. I figure beating your ass again will get rid of it so I can get back down to business. *Suddenly "No Chance in Hell" hits and the fans stand to boo. The Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua exit the curtain and begin to head to the ring. No characteristic taunting. They both head with a purpose. Wall slides into the ring and quickly grabs a microphone.* CUBAN Did my ears decieve me? Did I hear you out here overlooking me? Ryan Smith you just made the biggest mistake of your life! I promised I was going to end your career. And that promise still stands. You beating me was nothing but a fluke. You think a maggot like you scares me? Smith I'm warning you right now. Don't overlook me or the Lightening Crew...or you'll wind up in a hospital bed. RYAN Well then big guy.......tell me what you're going to do about it? Do you want to fight me? At The Year of Living Anglelously? You want to bring your stupid chain? The one you cracked across my face last week!? *A smile crosses Wall's face as he walks over to the corner and begins conferring with Mr. Boricua. Both men seem to be debating fiercley and finally Wall turns back around.* CUBAN Fine. I accept your challenge Ryan Smith. And I will bring that "stupid little chain" with me! I'm challenging you to a Chain on a Pole match! *The fans all begins talking at once at this revelation.* COLE A Chain on a Pole match!? CABOOSE Smith is so dead. SMITH That sounds great. I'll see you at The Year of Living Anglelously. And you can bring tubby there along with you. CUBAN Actually Smith. You can see me and "tubby" as you put it next week! See before I came out here I exited our new GM's office! And he has signed Ryan Smith vs. The Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua right here next week! *Smith's eyes become wide before settling back into his cool demeanor.* SMITH Very well. Next week will be a warmup. See you then. *The OU Fight Song plays as Smith walks right past Wall and Boricua and exits the ring. He backs up the ramp looking at both men as they talk and point at Smith.* MC Wow, Ryan Smith versus Cuban Wall AND Mr. Boricua here on HeldDOWN~! next week, in a Chain on a Pole match? I can't wait COACH Speaking of the Lightning Crew, one of their members is receiving a 24/7 Title shot right...now! CUE: “No Chance in Hell” by Bradley Boyds ::The crowd boos at the all-too familiar theme music of the Lightening Crew. Spanish Fly emerges from the smoke, undaunted by the jeers of the crowd, and makes his way to the ring:: “Hailing from Tiajuana, Mexico, at a height of 4’9” and a weight of 199 lbs, a member of the Lightening Crew, SPANISH FLY!” ::Spanish Fly continues to jaw the fans as the jeers continue.:: “SET THIS F-CKER OFF!” ::The crowd’s jeers turn into murmurs of confusion as “Set it Off” by Audioslave blares though the speakers. Cheers are heard though, when it’s the 24/7 Champion Crystal that emerges from the smoke, followed by the ever-present cameraman:: COACH: “Woah, new music for Crystal. Hey Caboose, you like Audioslave, don’t you?” CABOOSE (muttering): “What a copy cat.” “Hailing from Coquitlam, British Columbia, at a height of 5’8” and weighing 138 lbs, the reigning 24/7 Champion, CRYSTAL!” COLE: “Well, this is a unique experience for Crystal. She is in the ring with someone who is both younger and shorter than her.” CABOOSE: “Yet Spanish Fly still outweighs her by a good 60 pounds.” COACH: “Damn, what kind of jacked up cruiserweight is this?” DING! DING! DING! COLE: “Well, since Spanish Fly is a cruiserweight, count on seeing some high flying action here as Crystal can take to the air herself.” CABOOSE: “If Crystal was smart, she would try to ground the cruiserweight. She’ll probably try to match him move-for-move though, just to impress the idiots here.” COACH: “Hey now playa, don’t be hatin’ on the fans.” CABOOSE: “Your even worse than them. Shut up.” ::Spanish Fly charges at Crystal right away while she’s talking to her cameraman. He catches her in the corner with some quick strikes, and whips her to the other corner. Fly goes to charge, but Crystal, using the ropes as leverage, leaps over him. Crystal then tries to charge at Spanish Fly, but gets an elbow to the face for her efforts. He springs to the second rope and goes for a crossbody, but Crystal dropkicks him in midair!:: COLE: “Nice counter by Crystal.” ::Spanish Fly rolls out of the ring immediately to catch a breath. Crystal sees the opportunity, and planchas over the top rope, but Spanish Fly sees her, and side steps Crystal so she lands right on her face!:: CABOOSE: “See! Told you she would be stupid and try unnecessary high risks like that! Good thinking by Spanish Fly!” COACH: “You better watch yourself boy.” CABOOSE: “Again, shut up.” ::Spanish Fly sees his opportunity and throws Crystal against the barricade before chucking her into the ring. Crystal is slow to get up, and Spanish Fly ascends to the top rope, and hits a beautiful hurricarana! He quickly goes for the first pin in the match:: 1! 2! Kickout! ::Crystal stumbles to her feet and Spanish Fly immediately hooks her and delivers a snap vertical suplex. He immediately does a standing moonsault, and follows it by a cover.:: 1! 2! Kickout! CABOOSE: “Well, that must be a new thing for Spanish Fly. What other time could he suplex someone like that?” COACH: “I know Spanish Fly has only been here for a couple of weeks, but he has to learn that Crystal won’t go down that easily!” CABOOSE: “Shut it, fanboy. OF COURSE he knows that.” ::But Spanish Fly seems a bit frustrated anyways. He yanks Crystal up by her hair and whips her to the ropes and delivers a pretty dropkick. He turns to the crowd, and bows to them, as the boo like crazy. Crystal gets up, and Spanish Fly picks her up and has her on his shoulders.:: CABOOSE: “An impressive display of strength by Spanish Fly!” COLE: “Uh, not really. Crystal’s only 140 pounds, tops.” ::Spanish Fly seems to be going for the Death Valley Driver, but Crystal armdrags her way out! They both get up and SF charges, only to get arm dragged again. As both get up again, Crystal whips Fly to the corner, but Fly reverses. Spanish Fly then somersaults, and goes for the monkey flip, ala RVD. He flips Crystal, but Crystal lands on her feet! Spanish Fly is unaware though, and keeps showing off the audience. He finally turns around, only to be hit with the SPEAR~! Oddly, Crystal doesn’t go for the cover though. She picks up Spanish Fly, hooks him up, and hoists him up to the top turnbuckle. She then springs off the bottom rope, and enziguries Spanish Fly!:: COACH: “OUCH~!” ::Crystal then hooks Spanish Fly at the midsection, and performs a Northern Lights Suplex while Spanish Fly is still on the top rope! She keeps in hooked for the pin.:: 1! 2! 2.5! Kickout! ::Spanish barely kicks out. Crystal picks him up and hooks him by the arms. She delivers ONE butterfly suplex. And then TWO butterfly suplexes. And finally THREE butterfly suplexes! She then goes towards the ropes and signals for the Diamond in the Rough! She springboards once, twice and hits it!:: 1! 2! 3! DING! DING! DING! CUE: “Set it Off” by Audioslave “And your winner, and STILL 24/7 champion is CRYSTAL~!” MC Great title defense by Crystal, proving why she is the fightingest Female Phenom in the business today! ::The camera cuts back to the bridge where Tha Puerto Rican is at. He is freezing and keeps checking his watch. He plays with one of his dreadlocks. Colombian Heat appears next to him carrying a black duffel bag.:: Colombian Heat: Yo, dawg. Is The Mad Cappa gonna show or what? I gotta get home early; you know what I’m saying? Got to go and record Chappelle’s Show tonight. I’m Rick James bitch! Ha! HA! That dude is crazy, man! Tha Puerto Rican: Heat, can you concentrate on the matter at hand instead of some crappy overhyped overrated comedian? We’re not going anywhere until The Mad Cappa shows up. And he will be here. Trust me. I know he will be. I know The Mad Cappa better than he knows himself…and George Carlin is funnier than Dave Chappelle. Colombian Heat: Pssshhh! You don’t know what you’re talking about! Dave Chappelle is the bomb, yo! And—yo, nevermind. P.R.: Watch incase Cappa arrives! Heat: Yes sir, boss! ::Colombian Heat leaves as the camera does a close-up of Tha Puerto Rican. P.R. is angry and sneering as he awaits Mad Cappa’s arrival.:: P.R.: He’ll be here. I know he will be. He’s coming. I know he is. ::Suddenly, P.R.’s 2-way pager goes off. P.R. opens it and checks the message: “NEVER FORGET: PAYBACKS...ARE...HELL!!!-MAD CAPPA.” The crowd cheers. P.R. sneers.:: MC: P.R. still waiting for The Mad Cappa’s arrival. More HeldDOWN~! In two minutes and two seconds! ::FADE OUT:: ::COMMERCIALS:: ::The camera cuts back to the bridge where Tha Puerto Rican is at. He is freezing and keeps checking his watch. He plays with one of his dreadlocks. Colombian Heat appears next to him carrying a black duffel bag.:: Colombian Heat: Yo, dawg. Is The Mad Cappa gonna show or what? I gotta get home early; you know what I’m saying? Got to go and record Chappelle’s Show tonight. I’m Rick James bitch! Ha! HA! That dude is crazy, man! Tha Puerto Rican: Heat, can you concentrate on the matter at hand instead of some crappy overhyped overrated comedian? We’re not going anywhere until The Mad Cappa shows up. And he will be here. Trust me. I know he will be. I know The Mad Cappa better than he knows himself…and George Carlin is funnier than Dave Chappelle. Colombian Heat: Pssshhh! You don’t know what you’re talking about! Dave Chappelle is the bomb, yo! And—yo, nevermind. P.R.: Watch incase Cappa arrives! Heat: Yes sir, boss! ::Colombian Heat leaves as the camera does a close-up of Tha Puerto Rican. P.R. is angry and sneering as he awaits Mad Cappa’s arrival.:: P.R.: He’ll be here. I know he will be. He’s coming. I know he is. ::Suddenly, P.R.’s 2-way pager goes off. P.R. opens it and checks the message: “NEVER FORGET: PAYBACKS...ARE...HELL!!!-MAD CAPPA.” The crowd cheers. P.R. sneers.:: MC: P.R. still waiting for The Mad Cappa’s arrival. More HeldDOWN~! In two minutes and two seconds! ::FADE OUT:: ::COMMERCIALS::

Woke Up This Morning Got Yourself A Gun Mama Always Said You’d Be The Chosen One *Drek Stone walks out of the entranceway to a chorus of boos. He struts down to ringside, grasping a gift-wrapped, rectangular object in his right arm. He slides the gift into the ring, walks over to the ring announcer, and casually pulls the microphone out of his hands. He slowly walks into the ring, picks up his gift, and props it against the ring ropes. He then stares at the fans with a smirk on his face. He nonchalantly fixes his suit before finally speaking into the mic.* DREK Dama, like I said earlier tonight, I realize that we got off on the wrong foot last week. I was trying to walk through the hallway, you were blocking the entire path…….I guess there was a little miscommunication between us. It’s nobody’s fault. It’s just something that happened. But after my match that night, I went home and thought about what transpired. It was then that I realized that this problem needs to be addressed sooner rather than later. That we need to end this thing before it winds up getting out of control. CABOOSE See this? Along with being an outstanding athlete, he’s a peacemaker as well! You could learn something from this, Coach. COACH Oh, please. What ulterior motives does Drek have tonight? CABOOSE Coach, you need to do something about this paranoia. It’s a little worrying. DREK See, Dama, I really have no interest in fighting you. There’s no room for a feud between us two. You have your goals to take care of, first. I mean, aren’t you going for those Tag Titles? Making a real strong bid for them? And didn’t you want revenge on that guy…..what’s his name…..Smith? Didn’t you want to get back at him for embarrassing you in the ring? For keeping you down for a three count, despite the empty threats you made to end his career? Aren’t these your type of goals? The stuff you seem more…..what’s the word…..SUITABLE for accomplishing? I don’t want to keep you from completing these goals. CABOOSE Amazing. What a humanitarian! DREK And then again, I know you don’t want to keep me from accomplishing what I’m here to do. I came to the OAOAST for one reason. I came here to quickly rise to the top and grab the Heavyweight Championship. To once again have the feeling of holding gold in my hands. Then, from there, we can work on boosting ratings, increasing buyrates, getting this godforsaken federation some actual PUBLICITY…..with myself on top, I could make sure to accomplish all that. And I really can’t do that if I’m feuding with you…. COLE So that’s what this is about. He thinks he’s better than Damaramu. CABOOSE That’s not what he said. You missed the entire point! Color me shocked, Cole. Really. COACH What color is “shocked”, Caboose? CABOOSE Oh Christ, Coach. Stay away from the jokes. DREK So, as you can see, a feud between us wouldn’t do anybody any favors. I came here to receive a meteoric rise to the top, settling at the top of the OAOAST mountain as the Heavyweight Champion. You’re here to accomplish your more……minor goals. Our careers are on two different paths. And I don’t need to be distracted from my important goals by fighting with you……and I’m sure you don’t want to be distracted from fighting that Smith guy by me. So that’s why I’m here tonight. To let bygones be bygones. Dama, as you can see, I’ve brought a special gift here tonight to quickly settle the bad blood between us. So I’m asking you to come out here now and unwrap the present I’ve prepared for you. This way, we can both move on with our lives, and…… *The sounds of ringing funeral bells interrupt Drek Stone in the middle of his interview. The arena slowly turns dark, and a green spotlight shines at the top of the ramp. Slowly, Damaramu saunters out as the “Ministry of Darkness” echoes throughout the entire arena. As he eerily walks down to ringside, Drek quickly grabs the gift and holds it to his chest. Finally, Damaramu enters the ring and the lights go back to normal. Drek almost begins to start talking into the microphone again, but he catches Dama staring a hole through him. Drek gives him a reassuring smile, but Dama continues to stare with a scowl on his face. At this point, Drek stops smiling, and he stares back at Dama with a cautious glare.* DREK Now, Dama, I can see you’re upset. You were like this last week when we bumped into each other in the hallway. Originally, I couldn’t understand just WHY you were so angry. It didn’t make any sense to me. We had just met each other for the first time, you got an up-close glance of a future OAOAST World Champion…..I just didn’t understand where the anger was coming from. Then it finally hit me! I felt like such a STUNAD when it came to me. The source of all your anger……it was jealousy. COLE Jealousy?! COACH What the hell is he talking about?! DREK Yes, you were a little jealous. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Admittedly, I originally snubbed you and, for that, I’m sorry. See, when I gave that chauffeur an autographed picture of myself last week, I accidentally forgot to bring any extras. Then I saw you in the hallway, and you were obviously expecting me to give you an extra photograph. But, unfortunately, I left them all in my hotel room. So there you were, expecting to receive a gift, and I had nothing to give you. At that point, I can understand your disappointment and resentment. I would have been upset too! So, to make up for that little slight, I’ve made sure to bring you a gift tonight. To absolutely smooth everything over. *Drek makes an attempt to hand the present over to Damaramu. But Dama refuses to accept the gift, or even acknowledge it. He continues to stare into Drek’s eyes.* DREK Listen man, I SAID this was a gift for you. Now take it…… *Dama continues to stare* DREK Okay……you obviously don’t understand the concepts of gifts. No problem. *Drek puts the microphone down on the mat and unwraps the present himself. Once he finally takes the wrapping paper off, he holds it up high for the crowd. It’s a portrait of Drek Stone! In the picture, he’s dressed in a pinstripe suit and has his trademark smirk. Some fans begin to boo the gift he’s brought for Dama, while some of the other fans start to laugh* CABOOSE How thoughtful. I mean, REALLY! How many men get a gift like this? COACH How many men would want one? CABOOSE None that I know. I’m signing up for 15 after the show. DREK There you go, Dama. I’ve given you an even BIGGER autographed picture. I mean, imagine the riches this thing could bring. People are going to be jumping all over you to get this thing. Offering you gold….silver….rubies….diamonds…..you NAME IT! The possibilites are absolutely endless. But it’s your decision what you want to do wih it. Personally, I suggest a nice spot right above your fireplace. The whole family can gather around. You can play Christmas songs and roast chestnuts as this handsome face watches over the room. Skull Mask can make the occasional visit to your home, staring at the perfection that you’ve brought into it. *Dama slowly pulls the portrait out of Drek’s hands and starts to stare at it* DREK That’s it. There you go. Enjoy it. I guarantee that when you walk backstage, you will be THE MOST popular person in the locker room. Let me warn you though….they’ll begin to swarm you to get a good look at excellence. Be strong! Be prepared! Don’t let them…. *Suddenly, with lightning speed, Dama brings the portrait crashing down across Drek's head! Glass shatters everywhere as Drek hits the mat rolling over onto his face. Dama stands for a second with the destroyed frame in his hands looking down at the fallen Drek Stone. Dama drops it and pulls Stone to his feet as the fans actually cheer him on. Blood trickles down Stone's face as Dama grabs him by the throat and pulls him close, whispering something to him. In his haze, Drek's eyes go wide at what Dama whispers to him. Dama then swiftly lifts him up high and SLAMS him into the mat with a chokeslam! After Drek hits the mat, Dama continues to stomp him for a few more seconds until grabbing the microphone* DAMA Drek Stone. I don't know who the hell you are. Nor do I give a damn who you are. See you bumped into me last week. I didn't really care. But I looked in your face and realized I didn't like you. Why? Because you remind me of Ryan Smith. You're both cocky assholes that need that chip on your shoulder knocked off. Well Drek Stone. Since you're so intent on getting in my business I'll see you at the Year of Living Anglelously. Don't worry about the tag titles. Skull Mask's new partner will handle things just fine. *Drek tries to get up* DAMA Go to hell. *Dama gives Drek a severe kick in the ribs, causing him to roll over onto his back. Clutching his ribs, Drek continues to let the blood flow down his face. Finally, Dama tosses the mic down into Drek's face and backs out of the ring. His white eyes continue to stare a hole through the fallen Drek before he finally turns and walks back up the ramp.* CABOOSE I’m…….I’m in shock. Absolutely SICKENING! I hope the cops are rushing to take Dama away right now. COACH Yikes, what an absolutely gruesome beating. CABOOSE His face……oh god, Drek’s handsome face. *Referees and agents run into the ring to tend to Drek. However, he pushes them away and slowly starts to sit up. After a few attempts, he’s finally able to manage it. He lifts his hand to his face to massage it, but feels something liquidy on his hand. Slowly, and suddenly shaking, Drek pulls his hand away from his face to see it covered in blood. He begins to steadily look at the mess around him, seeing the shattered pieces of glass and splintered pieces of wood scattered around the ring. Once again, he puts his hand back on his face and pulls it away to see even more blood covering his hand. At this point, he starts shaking even more violently. He takes a large slice of glass nearby and throws it out of the ring. He tries to pull himself up using the ring ropes, but his legs are too wobbly. He quickly falls back down. Two referees slowly pick Drek up off the mat but, once he’s on his feet, he pushes them away. However, having no one to support him, he falls on the top rope, but manages to prop himself up. The camera zooms in on Drek’s face, and it’s easy to see that his eyes are filled with rage.* DREK ……you’re a……dead man…..Dama. YOU’RE……A DEAD MAN!! YOU’RE FINISHED!!! *The referees slowly manage to pull Drek off the ropes and slide him underneath the bottom rope. Two referees are supporting Drek on either side as he slowly walks towards the back. The fans are hushed as Drek gets near the entranceway, but he forces the referees to stop. He waits a few seconds, then gives a double middle finger to all the fans in the audience. They immediately begin booing as the referees once again help Drek Stone into the back* CABOOSE I told Dama not to do it. I told him right here…..he didn’t want to do this to Drek Stone. Now look what he did. Dama tried to mangle that handsome face, and now his career is finished. Did you see the intensity in Drek’s eyes? COACH I did. But is the intensity of Drek ANY match for the intensity of Damaramu? I just don’t know, Caboose. COLE That’s going to be a HUGE match at Living Angelously. Drek Stone versus Damaramu! CABOOSE Dama’s going to be sleeping with the fishes. I guarantee it….. We're backstage on HeldDown~!, as the camera focuses on a door slowly opening. Dan Black steps through, wearing a typically sharp black suit and looking annoyed. BLACK Where the hell is he? Dan looks to the left down a corridor and scowls. He turns to the right and again sees nothing. As he turns back to the left the face of Jivin' Jim Ross is pressed up close against him. Dan jumps in fright and swears. BLACK Don't sneak up on me like that you- JR Now Danny, no need for that! I just soft shoed over to ya, you like it? BLACK No. Shut up about dancing. What did you want to see me about? And why are you dressed like that? JR is wearing a basketball jersey, baggy pants, sneakers and a huge gold medallion hangs around his neck. JR Its the latest image I got going! Street JR! You like? BLACK I bloody don't. You look like an idiot. What the hell is going on? JR We're going to cut a little promo, ok? BLACK Well, everyone is always interested in what I have to say, so- JR No, you don't get it- I'll cut the promo. You just stand there and look all dark and mysterious and brooding. BLACK But- JR It's what you do best, Danny. Now listen up. It's time for my promo. BLACK You're not going to....rap? Are you? JR Sure am! Look how over that Cena guy is! I want that kinda heat! BLACK What did I do to deserve this... JR Let's go! COLE Oh boy, Rappin' Ross! This is gonna be great! JR starts to sway from side to side, throwing his arms in the air and looking at the camera. JR Now y'all know me good ol' JR But ya didnt know I was a huge rap star! I'm the man with beat, MC Jim Ross I like to rap like I'm fellating a Hoss Now see I'm managing the Black man although he sure ain't a black man he ain't even Steve Blackman hell he don't even got a suntan but with JR he down with the homies in the hood When Rappin' Ross around hell it all good I take the ladies out and I make them holler Give them a dose of mah special sauce and they can suck or they can swallow- Word. JR finishes and folds his arms across his chest. Dan has his face in his hand and is groaning quietly. CAMERAMAN Er...is that it, guys? BLACK No! I want to say something. I can't let this buffoon represent me. Now listen up, HeldDown. Last week you saw me DESTROY one of your biggest monsters, Gunner Sharps. COACH What? He got the cheapest win I've ever seen! BLACK And I won't stop there. Anyone, anytime, any- hey! Dan is cut off by someone walking into his shot. The watching crowd POPS for the OAOAST X Champion, AJ Flaire! BLACK What the hell are you doing? Get out of my shot! FLAIRE Hey, sorry, I didnt see you guys there- BLACK What? You didnt see ME? Dan BLACK? How dare you? Who the hell are you anyway? FLAIRE I'm AJ Flaire, X Division Champ- BLACK X Division? You're joking, right? That thing is still going? That's the cheapest title I've ever seen! It's pathetic! Who did you beat to win that, Gillberg? FLAIRE Cheap? You've got a lot to learn about HeldDown, Dan. Cheap is that Adrenalin Title you're so proud of- you created the damn thing for yourself! BLACK You insolent little- this title is more important than anything on this hell hole of a show. You don't know the blood thats been spilt, the pain inflicted over the Adrenalin Title. FLAIRE Whatever Dan, you keep your pretend little title. The ratings for IntenseZone were so low that no ones ever heard of it anyway. BLACK Take that back! Take it back or I'll beat you for that X title, just to teach you a lesson. FLAIRE Now that IS a joke, Black. You wouldn't last five minutes in a match with me. BLACK Well lets see, shall we? There's a little Pay Per View coming up. One I intend on appearing at. FLAIRE Fine by me. You and me, one on one, X title vs. Adrenalin title, winner takes all. JR Now Dan, I don't think- BLACK Shut up, you fat idiot. I'll see you in the ring, Flaire. Polish up that title, I want it nice and shiny for when its sitting in my trophy cabinet. Flaire gets in Dan's face, and laughs softly, before turning sharply and walking away. COACH Well, we just got ourselves a PPV match! Dan Black vs. AJ Flaire, both titles on the line! I can't wait! CABOOSE More HeldDOWN~! in a few!

COLE Next up we have… (LIGHTS GO OUT) COACH Mommy!!!! COLE What the hell is going on here?? (The big screen lights up with a flash of lightning and the crowd buzzes in anticipation. A familiar guitar intro starts up and the crowd goes absolutely bananas!) HERE I AM………ROCK YOU LIKE A HURRICAAAAAAAAANE!!!!!! COLE OH MY GOD IT CAN’T BE!!!!! COACH The Scorpions are back together??? COLE No dumbass……..it’s…..it’s… (The Blurricane flies out of the stage and the fans are on their feet!) COLE It’s him!!!! It’s the Blurricane!!!! CABOOSE Well I’ll be damned….what rock has he been living under? (Blurricane walks to the ring and slides in with a mic in hand. He then motions for the crowd to quiet down a little so he can speak.) BLURRICANE I bet you didn’t expect to see me did ya?? (The crowd cheers) BLURRICANE In case you’re wondering Judas isn’t coming back. It seems he’s a little burned out with wrestling and I don’t blame him. (The crowd lets out a collective “awww”) BLURRICANE I didn’t quite expect to be back here myself, but something wouldn’t let me stay gone. (The crowd cheers again) CABOOSE Must be the cheap pops that brought him back. COLE Will you let the man speak? BLURRICANE I sat there at home tending to my broken leg and I began thinking. I began thinking about the people I left behind. The fans…(Pop from the crowd)…the wrestlers…the officials, and it occurred to me that none of them even called when I was rehabbing my leg!! COLE What?? CABOOSE Well this just got interesting. BLURRICANE But I’m the kind of guy that wouldn’t let that get to me. COACH I was going to call…I lost the number. BLURRICANE Or maybe I should say I used to be the kind of guy that wouldn’t let that get to me. When I sat there at home without a single phone call, card, letter, or even a goddamn fruit basket I realized that things were different!! COLE What’s gotten into him?? (The crowd sit in stunned silence at Blurricane’s words.) BLURRICANE No one gave a damn about me, because even when I was around I was just the comedic relief!! I was just the cartoon character that made people laugh, but no one took seriously!! Well I’m sick of being the court jester!!! My life has been hell! You saw the worst of it and yet you just laughed and thought it was a joke!! Well this isn’t a joke!! (Blurricane rips his mask off and tosses it down before reaching up and ripping the Blurricane shirt in half.) BLURRICANE Say goodbye to comic heroes and say hello to the real man!! My real name is Rick Edwards! I am not here to be your comic relief! I am not here to be your hero!! I am here to make you notice me!! You will notice when I am around! You will notice when I am not around!! And soon you will see who I really am!! (Rick tosses the mic down and storms out of the ring as the fans begin to boo.) COLE My God…what has come over the Blurricane?? CABOOSE It’s Rick Edwards. Can’t you hear? COACH This is awful…I always thought he was hilarious, but now he's...crazy! COLE Let’s go to a commercial break. I can’t believe this. COMMERCIAL BREAK

::The camera cuts to the backstage area. The crowd pops loudly as The Mad Cappa is shown walking in…ANGER~! Cappa breathes hard throwing things as he walks to the ring. Cappa yells out, “P.R.! P.R.! P.R.! COME BACK HERE YOU COWARD! P.R.! P.R.!”:: Michael Cole: The Mad Cappa is backstage. And he seems to be in a very VERY bad mood. Coachman: Can you blame him? HIS Puerto Rican Championship has been stolen from him by his arch-nemesis. His archrival is now in the possession of the title he wanted to make prestigious! Caboose: Cappa should have learned from his crushed larynx what happens when you messed with The Lightning Crew. But that wanker has to continue messing with The Lightning Crew. You won the Puerto Rican Championship at AngleMania III! YOU GOT NOTHING LEFT TO PROVE! GO AWAY! ::The crowd chants “MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA!” as Cappa walks through the curtain and into the entrance. No music is played as Cappa stumbles as he walks down the aisle. The crowd cheers as Mad Cappa mutters and curses, and yells as he demands a microphone.:: Coach: And now The Mad Cappa is out here once again. He looks like he wants to confront P.R. Caboose: He is going to have trouble doing that, since P.R. has left the arena! ::The Mad Cappa grabs a microphone and enters the ring. The crowd cheers, as Cappa stands in the ring, furious, and cursing. Cappa sneers at the AngleTron, and begins to speak.:: Caboose: Cut his mic off! I don’t want to hear Cappa talk! The Mad Cappa: GATLAMALA! Caboose: I hate that word so much! The Mad Cappa: P.R.! PRL! Tha Puerto Rican! Puerto Rican Lightning! Whatever you want to call yourself! GET OUT HERE RIGHT NOW! ::The crowd cheers. Mad Cappa paces back and forth in the ring.:: MC: Here we go! Mad Cappa: I AM NOT ASKING, I AM TELLING YOU! GET YOUR PUERTO RICAN, ASSHOLE, COCKY ASS INTO THIS RING! MC: The Mad Cappa is calling out Tha Puerto Rican, but P.R. is out of the arena. Do you think he knows that? Caboose: He was on his ass when P.R. left. I don’t think he remembers that he left. ::The Mad Cappa paces back and forth. Cappa sneers.:: Cappa: P.R. I am NOT waiting for you to come out any longer! I’m going to go backstage and drag your pompous, arrogant roody poo candy ass out here and kick your ass all over this arena! Don’t ask, just accept it! You son-of-a-bitch! You have screwed with me for the last time! You make me absolutely sick to my stomach! I’ve defeated you once before. I’ve kicked your ass once, and I can sure as hell do it again! So, Tha Puerto Rican, get out here right now, and give me MY belt back right now!!! ::The Mad Cappa stands in the ring for a few seconds. The crowd is buzzing in anticipation awaiting P.R.’s appearance. P.R. is nowhere to be found.:: The Mad Cappa: GET OUT HERE RIGHT NOW! P.R.! GIVE ME MY BELT BACK! ONCE AGAIN, GIVE ME THE BELT BACK!!! GIVE ME THE BELT BACK NOW!!! GIVE ME THE PUERTO RICAN CHAMPIONSHIP BACK NOW!!! GIVE ME THE BELT BACK NOW!!! GIVE ME THE BELT BACK!!! Cole: The Mad Cappa has been in the ring for a few minutes. P.R. has yet to arrive. The Mad Cappa: I’ll say it one more time. Give me the belt back. Give me the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship back. Damnit! Give me back the belt! ::The Mad Cappa stands in the ring waiting for P.R. to arrive.:: MC: Is P.R. going to arrive? Tha Puerto Rican: Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey Cappa! Hey Mad CRAPPA! Hey! Hey, Cappa! Up here! Up here you idiot! On the AngleTron! Look! ::Tha Puerto Rican appears on the AngleTron. The crowd boos loudly and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” as Tha Puerto Rican sports a cocky smirk. He is located at a bridge in the city. Tha Puerto Rican is wearing sunglasses, his upside down crucifix, a black Lightning Crew t-shirt, a Puerto Rico flag bandana, a gold chain, a pierced left ear, a camouflage jacket, a $500 Rolex watch, blue baggy jean shorts and black workman boots. Tha Puerto Rican has the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt held on his left shoulder. P.R. sneers at Cappa as the crowd boos. Cappa is furious.:: Michael Cole: Tha Puerto Rican is at what appears to be a bridge! Caboose: That is most certainly an interesting place to go with that belt! Coachman: I have a bad feeling about what he has planned. Tha Puerto Rican: Hola, Mad Cappa! It is I, Tha Puerto Rican! And, ah, it appears that I have something that belongs to you! P.R. does the People’s Eyebrow and has the camera do a close-up of the belt.:: The Mad Cappa: You’re damn right it’s mine! Give it back you son-of-a-bitch! Tha Puerto Rican: Uh-but-but. Watch the language. There could be children watching! Cappa: Enough of this bull, P.R. give me MY belt back! P.R.: YOUR belt? YOUR BELT? Pardon me, but last time I checked, you have only had the belt for 2 weeks, while I have held the belt for a YEAR, and 2 TIMES also! This belt is really mine, and it will ALWAYS be mine, and the only reason you have the belt is because the OaOasT forced me to give it to you. This belt will never be yours, and I hate you even more than I did for defeating me at the Pontiac Silverdome at AngleMania! Infact, I hate you so much. To show you how much I hate you, Mad CRAPPA, I may do something. I may do something that I thought I would never do. I may soon do something that even I will regret. ::Tha Puerto Rican walks to the edge of the bridge and takes the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt. He holds it over the water as the crowd stands up and buzzes in anticipation. P.R. sneers at Cappa as Cappa is now afraid.:: MC: Is P.R. actually going to throw the Puerto Rican Championship over the bridge? Coachman: He wouldn’t do that! That belt means the world to him! Caboose: But his hatred for The Mad Cappa has driven him to the edge, literally! He may do this because he knows that it will hurt The Mad Cappa. He knows that if P.R. himself gets rid of the one thing he cherishes the most, then Cappa will be upset, since he didn’t get the job done himself. He is just getting there before Cappa can! The Mad Cappa: NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! DON’T DO THAT! DO NOT DO THAT, P.R.! PLEASE! DON’T YOU DARE DO THAT! Tha Puerto Rican: And why not? Because you want to do it yourself right? You selfish prick! You sadistic bastard! You see joy in my pain. Well, I’m just getting the job done for you! Caboose: Told you. The Mad Cappa: Don’t do it! Please. P.R.: Get on your knees. Cappa: What? P.R.: I said Get on your knees and beg me not to throw the belt over the bridge! MC: Now come on! This has gone too far! Caboose: Not far enough! Cappa: You got to be kidding me! P.R. teases throwing the belt off the bridge.:: Tha Puerto Rican: The Puerto Rican Title will sleep with the fishes if you don’t get on your knees and beg me! Cappa: Okay! Okay! Okay! ::The Mad Cappa gets on his knees. He is hesitant. The crowd boos Mad Cappa getting on his knees. He looks at the crowd as if to say, “What can I do?” Cappa looks at the AngleTron, and sees P.R. smiling with glee. He then sneers at Mad Cappa.:: MC: This is not right. This is not right at all. The Mad Cappa is being humiliated right here tonight on HeldDOWN~! And all for the Puerto Rican Championship! Coachman: I’ve never seen The Mad Cappa so embarrassed. The Mad Cappa: Please. Please Puerto Rican Lightning. Please P.R. Please, I am begging you. I am on my knees. I am begging you to give me back the Puerto Rican Championship. I am on my knees, begging you. Please. Give me the belt back. Please. ::The crowd boos loudly and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” as The Mad Cappa sneers at Cappa. P.R. thinks about it and sneers at the crowd. He puts the belt back over his shoulder and laughs evilly. Cappa is now worry and is back on his feet. The crowd boos.:: Coachman: This has got to be embarrassing. Infront of all these people, The Mad Cappa is forced to bow before Tha Puerto Rican. Caboose: P.R. is just showing the world that he is indeed the better wrestler. That he is better than The Mad Cappa. He is proving it right now, in front of all these morons. Tha Puerto Rican is the superior athlete. And The Mad Cappa is nothing. The Mad Cappa is a Grade-A loser. Cappa is weak. Mad Cappa is horrible. MC: P.R. has Cappa right where he wants him. Can we stop this? Tha Puerto Rican: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!! You really are pathetic. I am loving this. I have you right where I want you. You are under my control. The Mad Cappa: Now, give me the belt back. NOW! GODAMNIT! GIVE ME THE BELT BACK NOW!!! P.R.: Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. I am surprised at your determination. Switch to decaf. You know what I’m saying? Cappa: I want the belt back. And I want it NOW! P.R.: Okay. Okay. Okay now Cappa. Calm down, son. Calm down. Tell you what. Lemme holla at ya playa. You want the belt back so bad. You want the belt, you come GET the belt! I will not be throwing this belt over the bridge. Oh no. BUT, I do want something in return for giving you back MY belt. I’ll give you the belt back, but I want to blackmail you into giving me something I want. The Mad Cappa: You name it. Anything. Anything. Tha Puerto Rican: I want a rematch. That’s right. I want a rematch so that I can defeat you 1-2-3 in the middle of the ring, and get my revenge for my lost at AngleMania III AND win my title back, since the OaOasT refuses to acknowledge me as the actual Champion Thank You very much! I will embarrass you this time, I guaran-damn-tee it! And I want this re-match…at The Year of Living Anglelously! ::The crowd pops as The Mad Cappa thinks about it.:: MC: Now there’s a barnburner! Caboose: Cappa is too chickened to accept it. The Mad Cappa: I accept! ::The crowd cheers loudly and chants “MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA!” P.R. sports a cocky smirk as he is satisfied by the answer.:: Cole: WHOA! P.R./Mad Cappa: The Rematch The World’s Been Waiting For at Living Anglelously, April 25th! Coachman: Their match at AngleMania III was a 5-star classic. Now we are going to have the rematch one month later at The Year of Living Anglelously! Tha Puerto Rican: Ah. That’s good. That’s good. It’s okkkkkkaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy. (P.R. dusts his right shoulder off). BUT! BUT! I want to make this match a little different than our last one at AngleMania III. You see, to prevent any shenanigans, and any interference like the one that took place at AngleMania, I would like if we had a special referee ref our match at Living Anglelously. A referee with an eye for trouble. A man of integrity, a man of great intelligence. I want Colombian Heat to be the guest referee for our match at Living Anglelously! ::The crowd boos. The Mad Cappa is shocked. Cappa now becomes furious.:: Caboose: A brilliant powerplay by Tha Puerto Rican! Inserting his best friend to referee his Championship match at Living Anglelously! The Mad Cappa: That is not right! You cannot be serious! Tha Puerto Rican: Oh, I am damn serious! And to show you how serious I am, let me show you how much the Puerto Rican Championship means to me! .R. walks over to the edge of the bridge, and holds the Puerto Rican Championship belt over the water. The crowd stands up in shock as P.R. shakes the belt.:: P.R.: Don’t make me do what I will regret! Will Colombian Heat be the special referee for our match at Living Anglelously?!!! MC: P.R. wouldn’t do this, would he? The Mad Cappa: YES! YES! COLOMBIAN HEAT IS THE REF! NOW GIVE ME THE BELT BACK!!! ::The crowd boos as Tha Puerto Rican puts the belt back over his left shoulder and sneers at Mad Cappa. The crowd boos loudly and chants “MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA!” and “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” P.R. sports a cocky smirk, which turns into a sneer.:: MC: What a lowly, despicable creature Tha Puerto Rican is. Humiliating The Mad Cappa and blackmailing him into a match at The Year of Living Anglelously for the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship, with Colombian Heat, Tha Puerto Rican’s best friend, as the special guest referee! Caboose: That’s called being smart, Michael Cole. P.R. used the Puerto Rican Championship as bait, and The Mad Cappa took it, hook, line, and sinker. Something tells me things are going to go P.R.’s way from now on, and it will culminate at The Year of Living Anglelously when Tha Puerto Rican defeats The Mad Cappa and wins back the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship! I love it! Smart idea from a man of great intelligence! Tha Puerto Rican is smarter than The Mad Cappa and he proved it right now! Tha Puerto Rican: Alright then. So, it’s settled. One More Time. The Mad Cappa vs. Tha Puerto Rican for the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship with special guest referee Colombian Heat at OaOasT The Year of Living Anglelously, Sunday April 25, 2004 live only on pay-per-view! The Mad Cappa: Okay! You got all that! Now, give me the belt back! And give it to me now! Tha Puerto Rican: Okay then. I got what I want. And now, to be fair, you should get what you want. But life is not fair, asshole! If you want the belt back, you have got to earn it, and you will earn it by finding ME! Don’t just stand there, come out and find me. You know where I am located! You want the belt so bad, you come get the belt! I DARE you to come and find me. I’m at the Don’t Call Me Lightning Kid Bridge on the corner of Puerto Rican Champion Boulevard and Mad CRAPPA Lane! Come on jabrony. You’re so smart, right? Use your intelligence to find me, the single greatest species to walk on the face of the Earth! The Mad Cappa: You’re not the single greatest species walking the Earth…you’re the single greatest piece of FECES on Earth! And I’m not sure feces can float! ::The crowd cheers loudly. Some fans chant “FECES! FECES! FECES! FECES!” Cappa smiles at his joke, but P.R. sneers.:: Coachman: Oh SNAP~! That was a good one. He got him good! Tha Puerto Rican (sarcastic): Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. You think that was funny? You think you’re funny? What? You think you’re The Rock now all of sudden? You think you’re John Cena? I’ve heard better jokes on Premium Blend on Comedy Central! You’re no George Carlin, you’re just The Mad CRAPPA! And just for that little attempt at a joke, you leave me no choice. .R. walks to the edge of the bridge once again. The crowd buzzes in anticipation and boo as The Mad Cappa looks on with curiousness.:: Tha Puerto Rican: You know Mad Cappa; this belt means the world to me. This belt is my entire life. This belt is my life support system. I have nothing but this belt. I don’t have many things in my life worth living for and don’t do many things other people do that makes them happy. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t do drugs. I don’t believe in God. This is all I got. This is what gets me through the day. This is my reason to live. This is why I put my body on the line night after night. This IS my life! THIS makes me happy! This is my blood. This is the reason I live. But Mad Cappa. You leave me no choice. I MUST do this! I HAVE to do this before you do. I have to make this sacrifice, just because I hate you so much. My hatred for you has driven me to do this, and it pains me, and I will regret doing this, but if it makes you sad, then it is worth it, just a little bit. Knowing that all your hard work will mean nothing, it’s worth it. Just a little bit. So long Mad CRAPPA’S hard work! It was all a waste. Adios, Puerto Rican Championship belt! ::Tha Puerto Rican throws the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt over the bridge. The belt hits the water with a resounding SPLASH~! The crowd, and The Mad Cappa, is shocked. The crowd is murmuring.:: MC: OH MY! Did Tha Puerto Rican do what I just think he did? Coachman: Indeed he did, MC! Tha Puerto Rican has just thrown the Puerto Rican Championship into a river! He has gone insane! That belt meant the world to him, and he just threw it away! Caboose: The Mad Cappa drove him to that point! P.R.’s reason to live was that Puerto Rican Championship, and now, thanks to The Mad Cappa, it’s gone! P.R. just sacrifice his prized belt to make sure Cappa didn’t do it first! What a noble man, P.R. is! Making the ultimate sacrifice! MC: P.R. is the ultimate nutjob! HeldDOWN~! Should has a lot of nut cases. Damaramu. Skull Mask. Tha Puerto Rican! Coachman: The Mad Cappa is shocked. The title he won at AngleMania III! The title that shows that he indeed defeat Tha Puerto Rican in the most important match of his life is now in a river! This must be hurting The Mad Cappa too! Caboose: The belt means more to Tha Puerto Rican then it will ever mean to The Mad Cappa. That’s why this is a shock. No one ever thought P.R. would do that! MC: Well, he did it. And now, uh, I guess the match at Living Anglelously will no longer be for the Puerto Rican Championship? I’m—not so sure what is going to happen concerning that match. Coachman: I guess—I guess we will find out in the upcoming weeks, but things aren’t going well for The Mad Cappa OR Tha Puerto Rican! Tha Puerto Rican: So, what are you waiting for? Meet me at the bridge! I’m sure the fact that the Puerto Rican Championship is no longer with us is enough reason to come and try and kick my ass! So come on! Come and get it! I’ll be waiting here all night if I have to! Just Bring It, Bitch! And that’s the truth, Ruth! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! ::Tha Puerto Rican sneers at Cappa and then disappears from the AngleTron. The crowd is buzzing when The Mad Cappa exits the ring. The crowd cheers loudly as The Mad Cappa mutters and curses, looking pissed off. He exits through the curtain.:: MC: And now it looks like The Mad Cappa will infact go after Tha Puerto Rican! Caboose: He is in for SUCH an ass kicking! Coachman: Don’t be too sure about that ‘Boose. The Mad Cappa is pissed. He was humiliated live on national television. He is now going to have to take on his mortal enemy at The Year of Living Anglelously with his enemy’s best friend now the special referee. AND his Puerto Rican Championship was thrown off the bridge into a river! Cappa has a lot to be angry about, and now he will take it out on Tha Puerto Rican right now! Caboose: Like I said, he’s in for a serious ass-kicking. ::The crowd cheers as The Mad Cappa disappears through the curtain. The camera cuts to Tha Puerto Rican pacing at the bridge, waiting for Cappa to arrive. He checks his $500 Rolex watch, and then saids “Son-Of-A-Bitch.”:: MC: And there is the challenger. He looks ready to fight. Coachman: I can’t wait to see The Mad Cappa meet up with Tha Puerto Rican. I’m as excited as I would be if Crystal invited me to her hotel room for some hot wild sex! Caboose: Stop. Speaking. Now. COMMERCIAL BREAK

::The camera cuts to the parking lot. The crowd boos loudly as a caption reads “DURING THE BREAK.” The camera shows Tha Puerto Rican getting into his car, laughing evilly.:: Tha Puerto Rican: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!! Come and get it, Cappa! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA!!! ::The crowd boos as Tha Puerto Rican places the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt in the car and then drives off. He raises the belt as the car leaves the parking lot and disappears off the screen. The crowd boos.:: Michael Cole: Tha Puerto Rican has left the arena with the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship! Jonathon “The Coach” Coachman: And The Mad Cappa has no idea where it is! Caboose: Serves The Mad Cappa right for running into the ring for no reason. Cole: P.R. is bitter about losing the Puerto Rican Championship at AngleMania and is now taking it out on everyone. Caboose: Tha Puerto Rican lost only because Colombian Heat hit Puerto Rican with a chair and Zack Malibu. P.R. would still be Champion if it weren’t for that chairshot! Coach: Not true, The Mad Cappa had P.R.’s number on that night. Caboose: That’s a lie and you know it! Cole: Well, regardless, the fact is, Tha Puerto Rican is now in possession of the Puerto Rican Championship belt, despite not being Champion. Caboose: But he will be Champion; soon, he will be champion. Infact, since he has the belt, the OaOasT might as well make him Puerto Rican Champion once again! Where’s Abe Vigoda? Cole: Well, it looks like The Mad Cappa isn’t through with P.R. yet. And something tells me their feud is about to get kicked up a notch. COACH It's now time for the "debut" of sorts for the Rave & Assault Squad, as this new transformation of the young men formerly known as the Minions, Mikey and Nate Tethers have apparantly formed a union with a young man only known as "SB87", and begged for a spot to prove that they still belong here in HeldDOWN~! for this week's show. OAOAST D.O.A. Abe Vigoda agreed, and that's how we got here right now! MC Let's go to the ring and see what the R.A.S. are all about! (The house lights go down, and a random techno mix starts blaring over the P.A. system. Mikey, Nate, and SB87 start bouncing out of the entranceway, and bouncefully dance to the ring. SB87 is jiving with small glowsticks as he comes down to the ring. Right as they get to the ring apron, SB87 tosses one glowstick to Mikey, and the other to Nate as he slides into the ring. SB87 then displays some tremendous breakdancing skills. BUFFER Introducing first....coming to you from wherever they slept last night, weighing in at a combined weight of 558 pounds...Mikey, Nate, and SB87: the Rave & Assault Squad! CABOOSE Let's see if this guy can move that well in an actual match! BUFFER And, already in the ring...at a combined weight of 610 pounds...the team of Phoenix, Chris Stevens, and Mike Hunt! CABOOSE What did he just say about his.... MC Get your mind out of the gutter! *bell rings* SB87 and Phoenix start off, as SB87 immediately charges at Phoenix, and slides underneath his legs. SB87 then comes to his feet, and slaps Phoenix in the back of the head. SB87 giggles to himself as Phoenix turns around, and then runs forward. Phoenix side-steps SB87, so SB87 leaps to the middle rope, leaps off, and twists himself to bring Phoenix over and down with an armdrag. MC SB87 has some fancy footwork, judging from the opening seconds. Both men come back up quickly, and SB87 charges forward for a clothesline. Phoenix ducks it, and turns around. SB87 then nails an impressive no-look front flip behind dropkick. Both men come back up, with SB87 being the first by a second. SB87 then jumps up, and Phoenix grabs him in wheelbarrow position. SB87 pulls himself upward, and then clutches Phoenix by the back of his shoulders, twists himself around, and brings Phoenix down with a front version of the John Walters Backbreaker (pulls opponent back onto his bent knees)! COACH I bet Phoenix wishes he had a big rack right about now! SB87 takes advantage of his unique positioning, and brings Phoenix over with a kip-up rana. SB87 quickly rolls to his feet, and sees that Phoenix is standing, but dazed and bent over. So, SB87 runs at him, and delivers an impressive flip into a Rocker Dropper-style legdrop! SB87 then rolls backwards into a headstand, and pushes up and onto his feet. He follows up, in one fluid motion, with a flipping legdrop. MC Wow! This kid's never wrestled before?!?! SB87 pulls Phoenix up, and locks him in a front facelock. SB87 drags Phoenix to the RAS corner, and tags in Mikey. Mikey then launches himself over the top rope and his partner, and scores with a sunset flip on Phoenix........1........2........kickout. Mikey kicks Phoenix in the ribcage region before getting up. Mikey then pulls Phoenix up, and goes for a powerbomb. But, Phoenix slips out from behind, and jumps into a tag into Chris Stevens. Stevens rushes into the ring and goes for a clothesline. But, Mikey slides underneath the arm, and uses it to pull himself up into a flying headscissors! COACH The newcomer SB87 isn't the only one who can hit you from any angle with an innovative move! Mikey gets to his feet, and waits for Stevens to get up. When Stevens gets to his feet, albeit in a bent position, Mikey charges up from behind him, and flips over for an inverted Stunner! Mikey then keeps Stevens's head held over his shoulder as SB87 springboards to the top rope. SB87 then guillotines Stevens with a deadly flying legdrop! The referee immediately grabs SB87, and attempts to force him back into the corner. While that is happening, Nate goes to the top rope as Mikey gets to his feet, and lifts Chris Stevens up for a powerbomb. Then, the former Minions drop Stevens with a spectacular moonsault/sitdown bomb double-team move! CABOOSE That was double-teaming at its finest! Nate goes for the cover as Mikey slides out of the ring and slaps his hands together to simulate a tag. The referee turns around for the count.........1...........2.......kickout! Nate pulls Stevens up, and goes for a suplex. But, Stevens comes out of the back end, and hooks Nate's head. He lifts Nate for a reverse suplex, but Nate lands on his feet behind Chris' back, and hooks his head. Nate then lifts Chris in Curtain Call position, and drops him neck-first onto his knee! MC That should be called "A Trip to the Chiropractor"! Stevens ends up in a seated position, as Nate comes off of the ropes, and dropkicks Chris in the face! Nate goes for the cover......1..........2......kickout. Nate gets up, and Stevens gets to a sitting position. Nate then kicks Chris right in the jaw to keep him down, and then runs to the ropes. Nate nails a handspring off of the ropes, and right into a tremendous moonsault! But, Nate makes a youthful mistake and pulls up Stevens with a headlock instead of going for the cover. CABOOSE No matter how spectacular you can make your moves, the basics will always come back to bite you in the ass if you don't master them. Nate tags in Mikey, and the former Minions both send Stevens off to the ropes. They lift him, attempting to go for the Room Spinner, but Stevens lands on his feet behind Mikey and Nate, and leaps to tag in Mike Hunt. Hunt dashes into the ring, but Mikey lifts him up for a powerslam, and both brothers drive him down with a unique powerslam/sitdown bomb combo! Mikey goes for the cover as Nate leaves the ring..............1..............2...........kickout! Mikey then drags Hunt's body near the RAS's corner. Mikey clutches the top rope with both hands, springs up, and nails an incredible split-legged senton! Mikey goes for the pin............1............2......rope break! MC Can we say that these kids get "high" on the air? COACH If you mean leaping ability, and not the state of Bill Watts's mental capacities when he hired Caboose, then yep. CABOOSE HEY! Mikey then gets to his feet, and wraps in a twisting leglock on the right leg of Hunt. He reaches out, and tags in SB87, who locks Hunt's other leg with the same leglock. Nate then goes to the top rope, and comes down with a brutal double-stomp to Hunt's nuts! SB87 then climbs to the second rope, and tags Mikey back in, as Nate goes back to the ring apron. Mikey grabs Hunt in a front facelock, and climbs to the second rope himself. SB87 then grabs Mikey's legs, and puts the front of his ankles on his own shoulders to shove them off to the right...and send Hunt over and down with a Mega Whip Tornado DDT! MC What was that? COACH We're wrestling commentators; we aren't supposed to know what moves are called! SB87 goes back to the apron, as Mikey gets to his feet, and nails a spinning wheel legdrop instead of going for the cover. He then makes another rookie mistake, and charges off instead of going for the pin. Mikey leaps to the second rope, and nails a Lionsault Tumbleweed! Mikey then goes for the cover........1...........2........kickout! Mikey then heads up top....and connects with a huge 450 splash! He goes for the cover...........1...........2........Chris Stevens runs in to break it up! CABOOSE Finally, the other team is starting to work together! Stevens raises his hands in the air in a quasi-celebration, and then turns around and walks right into a springboard corkscrew dropkick from Nate! Right then, Phoenix runs in, but SB87 springboards from his positioning on the apron to the top rope, and nails Phoenix with a flying tornado DDT! SB87 pulls Phoenix up and shoves him against the ropes, as Stevens and Hunt groggily pull themselves up with the ropes. The RAS then collectively deliver a triple dropkick that sends all three opponents through the ropes and to the floor. MC This doesn't look good for these guys! Nate then climbs to the second rope while facing his partners, and sits down on the top rope. SB87 goes down on all fours about three or four feet away from the ropes. Mikey then comes off of the ropes on the other end, leaps onto and off of SB87's back, shoots himself over his brother, and nails an incredible ultra tope con hilo! COACH I can't believe what I just saw! Mikey then stands up on the second rope, and climbs to the top rope while still facing away from the opponents at ringside. When all four men outside the ring get to their feet, Mikey launches off with an incredible Phoenix (twisting 450) plancha! SB87 then rises to his feet, and runs to the opposite side of everyone else. He bounces off of the ropes, and then launches off from a little less than half of the ring's distance through the middle and top ropes, nailing an incredible 720-degree twisting tope suicida! CABOOSE It's official: we are dealing with space aliens here! SB87 shakes himself off, and then tosses Mike Hunt into the ring. SB87 then climbs to the top rope, and nails an amazing Phoenix 630! SB87 goes for the cover..........1............2......Chris Stevens jumps in at the last second to break up the pin attempt! Stevens pulls up SB87, and attempts to powerbomb him. But, SB87 lands on his feet in front of Stevens and kicks him in the stomach. SB87 then sticks Stevens's head in between his legs as Mikey and Nate re-enter the ring. Each of the brothers then grabs an ankle of SB87's, and flips him over, driving Stevens into the mat head-first with the Death Party (sunset flip piledriver)! COACH Are we watching a wrestling match, or a video game? Nate then mockingly crosses himself, as Mikey goes up top and Nate grabs Stevens, obviously going for the Holy Divide. At the last second, Phoenix climbs to the ring apron and shoves Mikey down. Mikey lands on the apron as Phoenix enters the ring and forearms Nate in the lower back region. Phoenix then positions Mikey for a powerbomb, but SB87 nails a desperation dropsault on Phoenix to send him flying into a dazed Mike Hunt. Nate then shakes his cobwebs off and goes to the top rope, as Mikey grabs Chris Stevens, and picks him up in electric chair position. Mikey backs up, and Nate hooks Stevens's head in reverse DDT form. Then....BOOM! They nail the Night Cap! (Diamond Dust/Electric Chair Sitdown Tombstone double-team) MC They just killed that man! Mikey cradles Stevens for the cover as Nate and SB87 jump on Phoenix and Hunt...... 1.......... 2.......... 3! BUFFER Your winners of the contest...the Rave & Assault Squad! MC That was a very impressive debut for the youngsters! COACH I don't know about you two, but I think this business just found out that it has to catch up to these three. What a spectacular showing! CABOOSE They had inverted versions of inverted versions of moves I didn't know existed! MC In common wrestling fashion, let's take it to the back after this outstanding debut, as someone has something to say! *Gunner Sharps is shown putting his boots on, when we hear a knock at his dressing room door* GUNNER Come in! *The door opens to reveal Axel, with a half-smile on his face. Gunner stands to greet Axel, the two shakes hands, and Gunner sits back down and continues getting ready* AXEL I’ve got some good news man. GUNNER What, you’re over Crystal? AXEL (expression changes from happy to a little agitated) Very funny. I just spoke to the old bastard, and tonight, I have a chance to get some gold back. GUNNER Dammit Adam, I’m getting sick and tired of all this Crystal obsession shit. You cost me my match a couple weeks ago, and you lost at AngleMania. This is getting unhealthy. I don’t want to go after Crystal anymore. She’s done nothing to me in the past, she’s only rejected you. AXEL No my friend, I won’t be going against Crystal… that will happen again in due time. No Gunner, tonight, one on one, in that ring, it will be The Dark One, colliding with your former best mate, The X Division Champion, AJ Flaire(crowd pops at the mention of AJ’s name), and you my friend, will be the Special. Guest. Referee! Tonight Gunner, you and I will have a chance to break AJ’s back, FOR GOOD! *Gunner looks at Axel, a look of sadness on his face. He drops his head* GUNNER I won’t break his back, Adam. I… I can’t. AXEL You WHAT? You won’t break his back? He turned his back on us! He doesn’t deserve to have that belt! GUNNER No, he turned his back on YOU. I turned my back on him, and I now regret it. I can’t do it Adam. I can’t hurt him again. He doesn’t deserve it. AXEL Oh… I know what’s happened. I saw your AngleMania match. Your hometown crowd was cheering. You, my friend, have gone soft. GUNNER (standing up quickly) I have not! How DARE you insinuate that I have gone soft. I’m more intense than I ever have been, and I’m going to prove it tonight! If you haven’t forgotten already, I WON the match at AngleMania, while you were pinned by a girl (ooooooh’s from the crowd). I’m NOT going to fight AJ again, and I’m NOT going to go after Crystal again. I want to focus on my career, not your personal life. You cost me my fucking match with the Pure Adrenaline Champion last week, you ignorant bastard. AXEL (looking away, smiling) Don’t ever talk to me like that again, or I swear I’ll beat you down. I know your weaknesses Gunner, and one of them is our X Division Champion. I know how much convincing it took for me to get you to beat him down, you see him as more of a little brother than a friend. But you will make the right decision tonight. GUNNER Oh I’ll make the right decision alright. I’m going, now get the hell out of my way. AXEL As you wish. But know this Gunner, whether you like it or not, I have your back tonight. But if you don’t help me end AJ’s career next week, I won’t have your back… I’ll BREAK your back. *Gunner leaves and slams the door behind him, with Axel looking on, a scowl on his face* AXEL He’d better make the right decision. *The camera cuts to Gunner walking through the hallway, a troubled look apparent on his face* GUNNER Blinded Son of a Bitch Adam, he doesn’t even know what he wants anymore. *Gunner walks with his head down, not looking at who is in front of him. He keeps walking, and bumps into Crystal, sending her backward. Gunner, startled, steps back also, and gets ready for a fight* CRYSTAL You want some of this Jason? You want some of me again? GUNNER Oh shit, it’s you. Settle down, I won’t hurt you. I don’t want to fight you, you’ve done nothing wrong by me. CRYSTAL Like I can believe a word you say. For all I know you could spear me and take my belt. What makes you think I can have the slightest amount of trust in you? You’re taking orders from Axel. You’re nothing more than his servant. GUNNER BULLSHIT Crystal, that’s a bunch of crap. I’m nobody’s servant; I do things on my own. I won the AngleMania match without Axel, and I would have beaten Dan Black last week if Axel hadn’t of come out and distracted me. Anyway, I’ve got bigger things to worry about than you. CRYSTAL Enlighten me. GUNNER Axel versus AJ Flaire tonight for the X Title, and I’m the ref. Axel wants me to hurt AJ, but… CRYSTAL You don’t want to? GUNNER Yeah. CRYSTAL Well I’m going to put it this way. If you go out there, and you help Axel hurt AJ, it’ll be on your conscience. You and AJ used to be inseparable; he was like your little brother. How in the hell can you justify hurting him so bad? The decision is up to you, make the right one. *Crystal walks away from Gunner, leaving Gunner with an even more concerned look on his face* *The camera cuts back to the three announcers* COLE Well, some interesting developments in the back! Gunner and Axel may be at odds, and tonight we will see Axel and AJ one on one for the X Division Championship, with Gunner as the special guest referee! COACH Blockbuster announcement for tonight guys, Axel already holds a pinfall victory over AJ Flaire, a bit over a month ago in that Eight Man Elimination Match, at Zero Hour. CABOOSE I agree with Axel though, guys… Gunner has turned soft! The crowd was behind him at AngleMania, and now he wants to please them, and not do what he does best, and that is break bones. COLE Well if the fans are making Gunner soft, then Crystal is making Axel the same way! His feelings for her cost him many times in that match at AngleMania; he hesitated many times in the match, causing Crystal to get an advantage! But Gunner is in two minds about the whole thing. On one hand, he is the ally of Axel, and they are friends. On the other hand, AJ used to be his best friend, as Crystal said; Gunner treated him like a little brother, watching out for him. CABOOSE Gunner should definitely help Axel out tonight. The big man should just go out there, wait for Axel to get the kid down, count the three, and then break the kid’s back COACH How can you possibly justify that? COLE In any event, the X Title will be on the line, and it will be on the line tonight! COMMERCIAL BREAK

::A deep, slow voiced man saids "LIGHTNING CREW". The AngleTron lights up with an image of Tha Puerto Rican on it. The crowd boos the moment his face is shown. The image of a smiling P.R. changes to another image of P.R. raising the Puerto Rican Championship belt after a match. The crowd continues booing waiting for Tha Puerto Rican to show up. As the AngleTron shows image after image of P.R., music is being played in the background. The music is slow and mellow sounding like the opening to a classical song. A man whispers the words "Chance" throughout the opening. On the AngleTron, the image changes to an image of Tha Puerto Rican choked up. Follow by P.R. being very very angry. Follow by Tha Puerto Rican crying. Finally, the last image is of Tha Puerto Rican smiling in a psychotic matter. The music swells, the crescendo hits, the AngleTron switches to a waving Puerto Rico flag with, in big white blocky letters, LIGHTNING CREW appearing in front of it. A lightning bolt hits the entrance. Fog fills up the entrance as "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Boyds begins playing.:: Jonathon “The Coach” Coachman: LOOK OUT BELOW!!! Caboose: Oh please. It was just pyro going off. You don’t have to pee in your pants over it! Coachman: Too late. Michael Cole: Moving right along, it looks like Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are coming out here for their match coming up next. *No Chance (No Chance) That’s what ya got! (Ha, Ha, Yeah!) We’re up against No machine too strong Pussy politicians Buying souls for us are…PUPPETS!!! (Puppets!)* ::The Lightning Crew entrance video plays on the AngleTron as the crowd boos waiting for P.R. to arrive. They chant "P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!":: Cole: P.R. and Heat have had some problems over the past few weeks, stemming from what happened at AngleMania III back in March where Colombian Heat hit P.R. in the head with a chair causing him to lose the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship to The Mad Cappa. Coachman: Not only that, but PROTOTYPE: The PERFECT Lightning Crew Member, left The Lightning Crew 2 weeks ago. PROTOTYPE was the creation of Tha Puerto Rican, and it really hit him hard that PROTOTYPE turned his back on him in something right out of Frankenstein. Caboose: I see no reason to worry. Friends have spats every once in a while. There is nothing to worry about. What they should be doing is concentrate on getting the Puerto Rican Championship back from The Mad CRAPPA! They should use all their energy to make sure Tha Puerto Rican defeats Mad Cappa and wins back the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship. ::Finally, Tha Puerto Rican steps through the fog and smoke and the flickering lights, and smiles evilly. Colombian Heat, wearing his sweatsuit and clock around his neck, follows him. Heat dances and jumps up and down getting the crowd hyped up. He does several gang signs and grabs his testicles, sneering at the crowd. The crowd boos P.R. and Heat loudly, chanting "P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!" but P.R. and Heat do not listen. Tha Puerto Rican asks Heat if he is ready to fight. Heat responds with a “Hell Yeah!” and smiles evilly. Tha Puerto Rican laughs, and then orders Heat to walk with him to the ring. P.R. and Heat high five while walking to the ring, with Colombian Heat dancing along the way.:: *But will find their place In line (Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha) But tie a string around your finger now boy Cuz, cuz…it’s just a matter of time Cuz you’ve got…NO CHANCE! (You’ve got no chance) NO CHANCE IN HELL!!! You’ve got…NO CHANCE! (Yeah, yeah, yeah) NO CHANCE IN HELL!!! You’ve got…NO CHANCE! (Got no chance) NO CHANCE IN HELL!!! You’ve got…NO CHANCE! (No Chance) NO CHANCE IN HELL!!! (YEAH!)* Michael Buffer: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, coming to the ring at this time, at a total combined weight of 396 lbs. From San Juan, Puerto Rico and Bogotá, Colombia, respectively. They are the heart of The Lightning Crew. The second-in-command of The Lightning Crew, Colombian Heat, AND the leader of The Lightning Crew, the former OaOasT Puerto Rican Champion, THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOOOOO RICANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!! Caboose: Buffer should have said former AND FUTURE OaOasT Puerto Rican Champion, because Tha Puerto Rican will definitely get the Puerto Rican Championship belt back soon! Cole: You heard it right. P.R. and Heat. The heart of The Lightning Crew. Caboose: Actually Tha Puerto Rican is the heart of The Lightning Crew, and Colombian Heat, Vitamin X, and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez are the soul. But regardless, The Lightning Crew will not be breaking up anytime soon. P.R. and Colombian Heat have reconciled and are now ready to attack and kick all kinds of ass together as a team starting tonight! ::Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat walk cool and cocky to the ring as "No Chance In Hell" continues to play. The crowd continues booing them, some even throwing garbage in their direction. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat jaw with some fans at ringside and flip them off. The camera cuts to the ring where P.R. and Heat’s opponents are waiting. The two opponents stare at The Lightning Crew members with determined faces.:: Buffer: And their opponents. First, from San Francisco, California. Weighing in at 250 lbs. Standing 6"', he…is…SIMON STOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! ::Simon Stone raises his arms to minimal response. Stone yells. Stone is 27-years-old, Caucasian male, and has long, black, somewhat stringy hair and is sporting stubble. Stone wears a black singlet with red trim and flames on the tights. He also wears black kneepads, and black boots with red laces. He also has black wrist tape.:: Buffer: And his partner, from Jefferson City, Missouri. Weighing in at 230 lbs. Standing 6”0. TOM “CAPITAL” GORRRRRRRAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!! ::Tom “Capital” Goran raises his arms and smiles. He also gets minimal response. Tom is a 37-year-old Caucasian male with a rapidly thinning mullet, a tattoo of the NRA logo on his right short, and a 1970’s porn-style mustache. Tom wears short, black trunks with the word “CAPITAL” written on the back in white letters. He is also wearing black kneepads, and blue boots. He converses with Simon Stone as P.R. and Heat sneer.:: Cole: Tom “Capital” Goran and Simon Stone have a big task ahead of them. They are teaming for the first time tonight to take on two of the OaOasT’s most talented superstars in Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat. Heat and P.R. had this match booked by Vitamin X, in order to smooth things over. Caboose: And what a caring individual Vitamin X was to do this! He loves The Lightning Crew, and cannot fathom them no longer existing. What a great guy. Coach: Things looked to be cooled down earlier tonight between Colombian Heat and Puerto Rican. It seems like they are both back on the same page after that little bit of falling out 2 weeks ago. Caboose: Well, they didn’t appear on the show last week, so they had a week to cool down following that fight we saw in the ring. They had time to think things few and now they can get back to what’s really important. Getting the Puerto Rican Title back home to The Lightning Crew! Go get them, P.R.! P.R. and Colombian Heat step onto the ring apron and sneer at the crowd. They enter the ring, and spin around soaking in the jeers, and revealing in the hatred the fans feel for him. P.R. laughs evilly, and talks about how great he is, and then does the HBK-pose while pyro fires up behind him and Colombian Heat stands next to him posing. Tha Puerto Rican laughs evilly as the crowd boos loudly and chants "P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!" Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat get on the top rope and pose, receiving nothing but boos. P.R. flips the crowd off then heads to another turnbuckle, where a single spotlight shines on him. He poses a'la The Rock, and again receives boos. The crowd chants "P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!" but P.R. just sneers at the crowd as "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Boyds continues playing. Tha Puerto Rican jaws with the fans, then heads off the top rope and stands in the ring, as the lights go back on in the arena, and the fans chant "P.R. SUCKS!" "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Boyds dies down. Colombian Heat removes his red backwards hat and sunglasses and clock. He then takes off his sweatsuit to reveal his wrestling attire and bounces off the ropes, dancing, getting the crowd hyped up. Tom Goran and Simon Stone stand in one corner of the ring looking at P.R. and Heat. Heat jaws with the fans as P.R. smiles evilly. The crowd still chants and Tha Puerto Rican still trash talks. The bell rings.:: *DING DING DING* Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat vs. Tom “Capital” Goran and Simon Stone: The camera cuts to The Mad Cappa standing in his dressing room with the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt over his right shoulder. He has an angry look on his face as he stands in his room watching the match. Cole: The Mad Cappa is watching his mortal enemy in this match. Caboose: He is not going to have that Puerto Rican Championship for long! The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” as P.R. and Heat sneer at the crowd. They do “Rock-Paper-Scissors” and Heat’s rock beats P.R.’s scissors, so Heat goes first. P.R. high fives Heat and then exits the ring as Tom “Capital” Goran enters first. Coach: I LOVE Rock-Paper-Scissors! Let’s play, ‘Boose! Caboose: Get away from me before I break your fingers! Coach: Fine! MC: Colombian Heat and Tom Goran starting things off. Colombian Heat and Tom “Capital” Goran circle the ring. They lock up and jockey for position. P.R. cheers Heat on as Heat gets the better of Goran. Heat whips Goran into the ropes, and follows with a reverse elbow to the face. Heat stomps on Tom as he tries to get up as the camera cuts to Cappa watching the match. Heat picks up Goran and sends him into P.R.’s corner. Heat chops Goran’s chest. Tha Puerto Rican takes the tag rope and chokes “Capital” with it. The crowd boos loudly as the referee orders P.R. to stop. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” as Heat tags in Tha Puerto Rican. Cole: And now Colombian Heat tags in Tha Puerto Rican who is taking over where Heat left off. Tha Puerto Rican chops Tom Goran. The crowd “WOOOOOOOOOOOs!” with each chop. P.R. trash talks Goran and then slaps him in the face. Tha Puerto Rican whips Goran into a turnbuckle, and follows with a Stinger Splash. P.R. follows with a sidewalk slam. He goes for the cover. 1… 2… KICK OUT!!! Cole: And Tom Goran kicks out just in the nick of time. Caboose: He was just lucky this time. He won’t be so lucky for long. P.R. chokes out Goran and then whips him into a turnbuckle. Goran reverses however, and Tha Puerto Rican Flair Flips onto the ring apron. Caboose: Spectacular move from Tha Puerto Rican! Tha Puerto Rican looks at the crowd and points to his brain to show how smart he is. The crowd boos loudly. P.R. dances, but is clotheslined by Goran to a loud pop. Coach: Tha Puerto Rican was caught by surprise with that move! P.R. gets back into the ring as Tom “Capital” Goran tags in Simon Stone. Stone rushes towards Puerto Rican and beats on him with rights and lefts. P.R. tries to fight back, but Stone continues the assault as the crowd comes alive once again. Cole: Simon Stone is now taking it to the former Puerto Rican Champion. Coach: Stone with rights and lefts on the face of Tha Puerto Rican. Simon Stone gives Tha Puerto Rican a European Uppercut. He Irish Whips Tha Puerto Rican into the ropes, and gives him a giant clothesline which causes Tha Puerto Rican to do a somersault onto the mat that causes the crowd to groan. MC: OH MY! What a tremendous clothesline from Simon Stone! Stone going for the cover. 1! 2! And P.R. kicks out! Close call. Stone almost had the upset right there! Caboose: Stone and Goran have no chance in hell of defeating the team of Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat! MC: Stone picks up P.R. and tags in Goran. And—oh come on! P.R. with a cheapshot, poking Stone in the eyes! Caboose: HA! HA! A great shot right there! A classic Caboose maneuver right there! HA! HA! Tha Puerto Rican tries to go to Colombian Heat, but Tom “Capital” Goran grabs his right leg. So, P.R. gives Tom an enzuguri, and tags in Colombian Heat. Colombian Heat kicks Tom Goran down to the mat, trash talking him along the way. Heat stops to pose and gets more boos. Heat gives some more hand signs and sneers at the crowd. He grabs Goran and gives him the Pimp Juice. He goes for the cover. 1… 2… THRE-KICK OUT!!! Colombian Heat punches Tom Goran in the face as the camera cuts to The Mad Cappa still watching the match in his dressing room. Heat grabs Goran and Irish Whips him into the ropes. He ducks under Goran and then grabs him by the neck; giving him the Gangsta Slam. Heat then heads to the ropes, and follows with the Where The Hood At?. He goes for the cover again. 1…2…KICK OUT!!! Heat gets a bit frustrated, but P.R. tells him to continue wrestling. MC: Heat grabs Tom Goran and Irish Whips him into the turnbuckle. Colombian Heat rushes towards Goran, but Goran sticks his right boot out, hitting Heat in the face. The crowd cheers as Tom grabs Heat and gives him a fallaway slam. He then picks up Heat, and punches him in the face several times. Goran Irish Whips Heat into the ropes, and goes for a German Suplex, but Heat reverses, and gives Goran the Get Crunk’d Up. The crowd boos loudly as Tha Puerto Rican applauds Heat. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” Heat knees Goran in the back several times and then picks him up. Coach: Colombian Heat is now heading to the top rope! What is he going to do now? Caboose: He could be going for the Drive-By, which is one of his signature moves. MC: If Heat hits The Drive-By, it could possibly be the end of this matchup. Coach: This is big. Colombian Heat gets on the top rope as the crowd stands up and boos loudly. Heat flips the crowd off and flashes some more gang signs, before leaping off the top with The Drive-By. However, Tom “Capital” Goran moves out of the way, and Heat hits the canvas to a loud pop. Michael Cole: And Heat eats canvas! Coachman: Tom Goran has just escaped the Drive-By! Talk about a surprise! Caboose: Aw! Come on! You got to be kidding me! Come on Heat! Get up! Get up! Tha Puerto Rican starts to show signs of worry and reaches his arm out for the tag. Tom “Capital” Goran slowly gets up and struggles to reach Simon Stone. The crowd cheers as Tom Goran tags in Simon Stone. MC: And Stone gets the tag just in the nick of time! Simon Stone beats on Colombian Heat as P.R. orders Heat to fight back. Stone punches Tha Puerto Rican in the face to a loud pop. Stone goes to Colombian Heat once again, but Heat lowblows Stone to boos. MC: Now come on! That is not right! Colombian Heat with an illegal move. A lowblow on Simon Stone! Colombian Heat trash talks Simon Stone and then gets behind him. He grabs his arms and lifts him up, and brings him down for the Colombian Necktie. Michael Cole: And now the Colombian Necktie! Colombian Heat has just hit Simon Stone with his finishing move! Caboose: It’s all over now! Simon Stone and Tom “Capital” Goran are about to feel the wrath of The Lightning Crew! HA! HA! Colombian Heat sneers at the crowd and then looks at Tha Puerto Rican. P.R. yells for Heat to tag him in. Heat is a little hesitant, saying, “Do I have to?” Tha Puerto Rican yells out “TAG ME IN, DAMNIT!” MC: It looks like Tha Puerto Rican wants to be the one who pins Simon Stone. Could this be more signs of dissension between P.R. and Heat? Caboose: You’re looking too much into it, Cole. Colombian Heat hesitates, but tags in Tha Puerto Rican. The crowd boos loudly as Tha Puerto Rican laughs evilly and gets ready to deliver the P.R. Nightmare. The crowd stands up and boos loudly as P.R. trash talks Simon Stone, sneering. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” MC: And now, it looks like it is all over. Simon Stone just got Colombian Necktie, and now it looks like P.R. is putting the exclamation point, by giving Stone the P.R. Nightmare. Coach: It could be all over for Simon Stone now! Caboose: Say goodbye, Simon Stone. The crowd boos loudly and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” as Stone slowly gets up. Some fans throw garbage into the ring, as Stone gets on one knee. P.R. yells, “GET UP, DAMNIT!” as Simon Stone, sweating and breathing hard, gets up. He turns around and gets kicked in the stomach. Tha Puerto Rican gives Simon Stone the P.R. Nightmare to boos, and cheers from Colombian Heat. MC: The P.R. Nightmare! Tha Puerto Rican has just given Simon Stone the P.R. Nightmare! It’s all over! Caboose: What a great move! P.R. covers Simon Stone. Tom “Capital” Goran tries to stop the pinfall, but Colombian Heat enters the ring and punches Goran out of the ring. 1… 2… 3!!! *DING DING DING* (3:39) MC: And the match is over! Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat win! Caboose: As if there were any doubt! Michael Buffer: The winners of this contest…COLOMBIAN HEAT AND THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOOOO RICANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!! Caboose: Notice that Colombian Heat’s name was said first? See? There are no problems with The Lightning Crew! It is all for naught. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are still friends. They’re closer than most brothers are! They are like family. There are absolutely positively no problems with these two! Coachman: For now, Caboose. For now. ::”No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Boyds starts playing again as the crowd boos loudly and throws garbage into the ring. The referee raises Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat’s hands in the air as the crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” P.R. laughs evilly as Colombian Heat tries to catch his breathe and wipe the sweat off his forehead. Tha Puerto Rican jaws with the fans and flips them the middle finger, sneering at the crowd the entire time. Tha Puerto Rican talks with Colombian Heat as Simon Stone and Tom “Capital” Goran slowly exit the ring. Heat sports a cocky smirk and flashes some gang signs and then yells out “YEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHHHHH BOOOOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!”:: MC: It was a hard fought battle, but the heart and soul of The Lightning Crew came out on top this time around. But Tom Goran and Simon Stone have nothing to be ashamed about. They put up a fight. It was a valiant effort, but in the end, Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat came out on top. Coachman: It seems like the trouble these two have had with each other is over. These two are once again on the same team, and they showed it tonight with their win over two very talented individuals. Caboose: You make it seem like it was an upset. A surprise that P.R. and Heat actually won. Stop B.S.’ing yourselves. It was obviously from the get go that these two would win. And once again, let me remind you. There are NO problems between P.R. and Heat. It is all lies. It is all propaganda insulated by the OaOasT. The Lightning Crew is fine. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are still friends. BEST friends in fact. It is all lies. Trust me. It is all lies, and that’s the truth, Ruth! ::”No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Boyds continues playing as Colombian Heat puts his right hand out. P.R. smiles and looks at the crowd. He shakes hands with Colombian Heat with huge smiles on both their faces, and then gives him a hug. The crowd boos even louder and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!”:: Caboose: You see? Everything is fine! Colombian Heat and Tha Puerto Rican are a unit once again! Everything is Okkkkkkkkaaay! MC: Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are on a roll here tonight. They have worked well as a team. Coachman: And they still have to deal with The Mad Cappa who, as we just saw, is in the building. ::Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat continue shaking hands when the crowd stands up and cheers loudly as The Mad Cappa runs into the ring.:: MC: THE MAD CAPPA IS HERE! THE MAD CAPPA HAS ARRIVED! Coachman: AND HE LOOKS PISSED! ::The crowd cheers loudly as The Mad Cappa hits Colombian Heat in the back of the head with the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt. The crowd chants “MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA!” The Mad Cappa beats on Colombian Heat while Tha Puerto Rican exits the ring. Cappa whips Heat into a turnbuckle, and stomps a mudhole in him.:: MC: And The Mad Cappa is now taking it to Colombian Heat! Caboose: Now what is he doing here? He had nothing to do with this match? He surprised P.R.! What kind of man is he? Can you tell me what kind of man is wearing the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt around his waist? Coach: Tha Puerto Rican attacked Mad Cappa 2 weeks ago on HeldDOWN~! Cappa is just returning the favor right now! Caboose: But he hasn’t even gotten to Tha Puerto Rican yet! ::The Mad Cappa whips Heat into the ropes and follows with the Fall From Grace. He then gets up and waits for Heat to get up. The crowd cheers loudly as Cappa trash talks to Heat. Heat gets up slowly, when suddenly Tha Puerto Rican grabs a steel chair and smashes it across the back of Cappa’s head.:: MC: Oh come on! Caboose: Hey, that’s fair! This isn’t a match! And The Mad Cappa attacked first! ::The Mad Cappa lies on the mat struggling to get up. Tha Puerto Rican smashes the chair across Cappa’s back again. He then does it a third time. Then a fourth time. Cappa screams loudly as he grabs the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt that lies on the mat. P.R. looks at the belt with a psychotic look on his face. He smiles evilly as he grabs the Puerto Rican Championship belt and kneels down. Colombian Heat coughs as he struggles to get up. P.R. grabs the belt and sneers at Mad Cappa. He waits for Cappa to get up, and hits him in the face with the Puerto Rican Championship belt. The crowd boos loudly as P.R. raises the Puerto Rican Championship belt to loud boos and “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” chants. The crowd pelts him with garbage as P.R. laughs evilly and sneers at The Mad Cappa, who is lying on the mat in pain, struggling to get up.:: Caboose: There he is, the REAL Puerto Rican Champion! The REAL man! He is a man’s man! He is better than The Mad Cappa in many ways! The Mad Cappa is just a jabrony. Cole: That belt belongs to The Mad Cappa, but Tha Puerto Rican is the one raising the belt right now. Coachman: P.R. wants his belt back, and he will get it at all costs! Cole: The Mad Cappa entered the ring and was attacked with a chair 4 times, and then hit in the head with the Puerto Rican Championship belt! The Puerto Rican Champion is now on the mat, and the former Champion is standing over him victorious! Caboose: It’s the way things should be. Tha Puerto Rican-Puerto Rican Champion. The Mad Cappa-lying on the mat in pain. ::”No Chance In Hell” begins to play again as Tha Puerto Rican places the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt over his left shoulder. He smiles and laughs evilly as Colombian Heat gets up and kicks Cappa in the stomach. Cappa is in the fetal position as P.R. laughs evilly and leaves the ring…with the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt over his left shoulder. P.R. jaws with the fans as he heads to the entrance.:: MC: Wait a minute. What? What is Tha Puerto Rican doing now? He just stole the Puerto Rican Championship belt from The Mad Cappa? Caboose: He didn’t steal the belt! He brought it back to its rightful owner! The belt is back with Tha Puerto Rican! Jonathon “The Coach” Coachman: The Mad Cappa is not going to be happy when he finds out his belt is gone! And taken by Tha Puerto Rican! MC: P.R. and Colombian Heat are leaving the ring with the Puerto Rican Championship! That son-of-a-bitch has just stolen The Mad Cappa’s title! Caboose: And bravo for that! It’s about time P.R. got his belt back. Cappa has had the belt for 2 weeks now. That is enough time already. It’s time for the belt to return to its owner—Tha Puerto Rican! ::”No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Boyds continues playing as Tha Puerto Rican walks to the entrance. He raises the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt to loud boos as the crowd throws garbage in his direction. P.R. jaws with the fans along with Colombian Heat. The Mad Cappa is now up, and looks at the entrance in pain. Tha Puerto Rican laughs evilly and smiles evilly as he places the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt over his left shoulder and flips Cappa the middle finger. He does the People’s Eyebrow and then leaves through the curtain. The crowd boos and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” The Mad Cappa lies in the ring in pain, on his knees. He is furious that the belt is gone. Cappa gets out of the ring, and stumbles towards the entrance. Cappa trips, but gets up and continues walking through the curtain.:: Michael Cole: Well, now, The Mad Cappa is following Tha Puerto Rican. And he looks pissed, but can he continue in his condition? Caboose: If the belt means as much to The Mad Cappa as it does to Tha Puerto Rican, then he will go after it, even if he has to crawl on his knees. Coach: Tha Puerto Rican has left the ring with the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt by his side, and now, The Mad Cappa is chasing after him! Something tells me that this isn’t over! Cole: It certainly looks like things are about to pick up. We’ll be right back with more OaOasT HeldDOWN~! Right after these messages! ::FADE OUT:: ::COMMERCIALS::

I've got planned: Rave & Assault Squad vs. Phoenix, Chris Stevens, and Mike Hunt A sit-down interview with Michael Cole asking Zack Malibu the tough questions about what was revealed on HeldDOWN~! this week. Hoff....Gibraltar....something's going down, (please PM me, Hoff.) Plus...sandwiches for everyone.

Got all of those segments, SJ and Zack. I'd appreciate if we could get in the final stuff in for this week within the next hour. The show already looks pretty big as is.

16, from the home of Jim F'n Hellwig...Crawfordsville, Indiana.

Reminder: all stuff needs to be turned in by 5 PM tomorrow. I've already got a lot of stuff already, and thanks to those who have made my job a lot easier by getting the stuff to me early. I appreciate it.

I just noticed that, lol. I dunno what the situation is going to turn out to be, but I've had my match written for a week now, and I don't really feel like changing it. Plus, I announced my match a good amount of time before MST3K did.

I thought it was during Hero/B-Boy, but someone else said it might have been when Collyer came out. Either way, we got back at them with a "Buy Some Tapes!" chant.

Yeah, I know who you guys are. Hero/B-Boy was a tremendous match, but you got to know that Chicago-area fans are total a-holes who don't respect good wrestling because they're jealous of how good an outside company has done after coming in just five months or so ago. I don't know if you noticed, but there were plenty of area-indy workers at the show. I think the only two that didn't come to bash the show were Danny Dominion (who was standing over by you guys for most of the night) and D-Von Fury from Simply Marvelous (he also worked IWA for a while as "Orangejello" of the Jello Bros. tag team). No, I was referring to the side of the building that had the entrance door, which is what I thought you were referring to directional-wise. We were sitting front row on the same side as where the wrestlers came out. I'm surprised you didn't recognized Todd, Tom, and/or Yan from other tapes, since they're front row at over 3/4th of the past two years' worth of IWA shows.

I remember you guys now. My group was sitting on that side of the building, but in the front row (if you guys were paying attention, we had Nick Maniwa and Tommy Thompson come over and talk to us more than once throughout the night).

I'd rather see Ian vs. Tank than Tank vs. Boz, because Ian and Tank's styles mirror each other.

Were you guys over in the bleachers? I was in the front row with all of the guys from Lafayette that go to all of the big IWA shows. Speaking of Fannin fans, my friend Todd that was sitting next to me is a Jim Fannin super-fan, and kept marking out for him during the night.

I was at both shows, and to say that both shows were really great is an understatement. I wasn't into April Bloodshowers as much as I should have been due to a headache and overall head cold, but it was a tremendous show. APRIL BLOODSHOWERS Michael Shane over Nate Webb & Adam Flash (Nate and Flash tried, Michael didn't seem to be) MsChif over Daizee Haze (For a heel, MsChif is over as hell as a face; MsChif broke out all kinds of really cool wacky, stretchy hold, and her inverted armbar DDT thing (you have to see it to know what I'm talking about) is freakin' awesome) HUSS! over Roderick Strong (Strong beat up Jacobs like he owed him money, and Jimmy took it like a maniac) Delirious over Nigel McGuinness (I thought the comedy at the beginning was pretty funny (Nigel: "Whatever you're smokin', I want some!" Delirious: "PCP!"), and the funky Euro-style matwork after that was tremendous. Sidenote: Nigel is now selling a "Best of" DVD, including a 55-minute HWA match against Chad Collyer. Too bad I barely had money to even eat, let alone buy stuff) IWA-MS Light Heavyweight Champion Matt Sydal over Emil Sitoci (Fun match, and Matt gave Emil a ton of offense) BJ Whitmer over Jerry Lynn to win IWA-MS Heavyweight Title (It wasn't the usual Jerry Lynn formula match, and therefore I liked it; they inserted a lot of crowd brawling, and Whitmer even bladed; the post-match teased a Whitmer face turn) Arik Cannon d. Chad Collyer (Really good technical match, and Cannon shined) Mark Wolf over Danny Daniels to win his "unknown stipulation" (Wolf physically looked as good as I've ever seen him; another really good match, but this is where my details start fading more and more, as exhaustion from the long day started sitting in. Post-match, we find out that Danny Daniels broke the microphone when he threw it down after his pre-match promo, and they had to do the angle where Mark Wolf got Chris Hero back into IWA w/out a mic) AJ Styles over B-Boy (Excellent match, match of the night, stiff as hell, and I thought the finish was cool...how's THAT for details? hehe) Fans Bring the Weapons: JC Bailey & Necro Butcher over Wifebeater and Corporal Robinson (A violent, violent spectacle that left me with my mouth opened in shock half of the time based on the stuff that these guys were doing to each other (that might be more because I've never seen a FBTW match in person); match ended after both Robinson and Wifebeater nailed each other, leading to Wifebeater putting Corp. through a lighttube table with a double-handed chokeslam; the ring was a sea of lighttube glass and blood by the end of the night) April Bloodshowers was a really good show, but the best was yet to come... SIMPLY THE BEST 5 Austin Aries over Michael Shane (Shane was again down with a case of "resthold fever", but Aries busted his ass to make this one good) Daizee Haze & Mickie Knuckles over MsChif and Allison Danger (Mickie busted her ass off and bumped like a demon while she was in as the face-in-peril; the story happening here was that MsChif refused to behave as a partner for Allison (or anyone else, for that matter), and therefore we got a few miscommunication spots; post-match, Allison attacked MsChif, Mickie and Daizee saved MsChif, and then MsChif misted Mickie because she hates everyone, yet might be one of the most over workers in IWA at the Highland shows) Danny Daniels over Colt Cabana (Total comedy match while Colt was on offense, besides for the few cool lucha spots he probably picked up while in Tijuana a couple of weeks back; the finish left an opening for a possible rematch, through Danny having to cheat to win) Zack Gowan over Trik Davis (It wasn't really too much of a match; post-match, Shelley and Gowan beat on Trik, including Shelley cranking back on the Border City Stretch so far that it probably did legitimately hurt Trik) Petey Williams over Jimmy Jacobs, Roderick Strong, Arik Cannon, Nate Webb, and Emil Sitoci (listed in reverse order of elimination) (Really, really amazing match; Strong again beat on Jacobs like Jimmy killed Rod's mom or something; Nate took a really hellacious bump that had almost everyone in attendance worrying for his health, as he overshot and overotated on a top rope moonsault plancha onto the other guys and landed back-first on the edge of one of the chairs; Arik Cannon, like MsChif, works as a heel in Highland but is way over as a face; Sitoci hasn't even been wrestling a year, but you cannot tell by how he works in the ring; both the match and Petey Williams got seperate standing ovations after the match) Steve Stone over Adam Flash (This was alright, but it couldn't compete with all of the other really great stuff on this show) AJ Styles over Matt Sydal (Second best match of the night; the story of this match was that Matt was the new young lion biting at AJ's heels, and was able to keep up with him at every turn; the best match I've seen Matt have where Delirious wasn't in the match, and AJ, by no means, had to make sure Matt was either keeping up with him nor did he have to noticeably carry him through anything; AJ cut a post-match promo where he said Matt was better than anyone's expectations that had him poised as "the next AJ Styles", and that he was "the first Matt Sydal") Jerry Lynn over Delirious (Pretty good match, but they had a superbly tough act to follow; a lot of hijinx in the early part of the match regarding a small bunny rabbit toy that a fan gave Delirious, including Delirious taking it away from a female at ringside and first putting it into one guy's hat, and then down another guy's shirt (the schitck was funny, outside of the morons who wouldn't shut up about the bunny and kept repeating the same really lame "jokes" when Jerry and Delirious started to actually wrestle; Lynn's knee looked to give out during the match, and he even acknoledged it over the house mic) Chad Collyer & Nigel McGuinness over Brad Bradley & Ryan Boz in a Tag Team Tournament Qualifying match (Another really great technical match, with the normally monster-style working Bradley hanging on the mat with Collyer and Nigel; Nigel played face-in-peril, and the heels beat the living tar out of him (though Nigel struck back just as hard when he got back on offense); Jim Fannin got into the ring as Bradley and Boz were going for their double horse-collar face plant finisher, which caused B'n'B to go tell Jim to leave the ring, which then gave Nigel and Collyer the opportunity to roll them up for the upset win; post-match, Carmine DeSpirito (B'n'B's other manager) fired Fannin as the advisor of the team, and begged Ian for another shot at the tournament...Ian agreed for May 9th in Highland, but if B'n'B lose, they split up forever...and two more details: their opponents will be the Havana Pitbulls, as managed by Bobby "The Brain" Heenan) Samoa Joe over IWA-MS Heavyweight Champion BJ Whitmer in a non-title match (Better than their ROH effort, though I don't know if it's better than their PWG effort since I haven't seen it; Joe completely obliterated Whitmer with forearms and chops, and was over like hell) In the big surprise match of the night, B-Boy over Chris Hero in a tremendous two-out-of-three falls match (Before the match, Samoa Joe came back out to try and get B-Boy to back out of the match so that he could fight Hero, but Hero said no, because he wanted to conclude his series of matches with B-Boy the right way; I literally cannot do this match justice because it was so good; the only negative is how annoying, rude, and ignorant some of the fans were, with a good portion of the crowd, all seeming to be either WWE marks or local workers that weren't good enough to get booked, either walking out of the show or chanting "Who are you?" at Hero. I don't want to end this on a negative note, so I'll say this: this match is worth spending the $15 on and getting the tape, though there's absolutely nothing bad on the show, and quite a few really good matches) Wifebeater and Corporal Robinson went to a draw in a two-out-of-three tables match when the third table ended up being a reenforced table that would not break (Robinson broke the first one with his Boot Camp cobra clutch Russian legsweep, and Wifebeater broke the second one in some way that I forget. They seemed to accidentally break the original third table, so Corp. asked for the match to restart, and Nate Webb carried a third table to ringside. Unfortunately, the third one, like the Nate Webb/JC Bailey match from the month before, wouldn't break after countless efforts by both guys to break it. Dave Prazak tried making the announcement that the match was a draw due to an unbreakable table, but there were a bunch of morons that kept chanting "Bullshit!" because apparantly nothing up until this point was worth their money, and they wanted to see a man literally die because of a shitty table. This noticeably riled up both guys, so they tried breaking it a couple of more times before Prazak announced the match was over, and the following quote: "This contest has been ruled a draw due to a stubborn fuckin' table! The morale of the story is: tables don't always break." *************************** I couldn't ask for anything more out of either show, and I hope the greatness of both shows translates to tape, since it would be nothing but beneficiary to IWA to have two shows this good out on Smart Mark Video for people to see and either continue to like the product, or jump on the bandwagon.

Steve Stone's teaming with Ian right now. As for new teams...they could probably team up Nate Webb with anyone and watch it get over easy. Sydal & Delirious are considered a regular face team, despite all of their singles matches. Danny Daniels and BJ Whitmer were supposed to work a qualifying match for the tag tournament against Stone & Rotten before they had to switch around the last Oolitic show due to the building switching around the show date. Other than that...I don't know.

Blah...something-something...blah.

I think the four-way itself might still be on, but it won't be for the belts. More on that when the official announcement comes out.

Geez, thanks for making me feel greedy, hehe. But, I'm back on for Simply the Best. I finally got ahold of a back-up for the guy that can't go on Saturday.

The storyline was that Sly saying that was completely breaking kayfabe and going into a quasi-shoot on the air. It would be like travelling back 15 years and having a WWF wrestler blab on and on about WCW on Saturday Night's Main Event.

Sorry about that, man. I just edited it in. I was trying to organize this, and a road trip this weekend, and I didn't have time to think when it came to double-checking. Again, sorry.

*PROPS* Myself CWM NY Untouchable CC Zack Dama Mystery Eskimo Papacita