Tony149

Over at the Big Board setup near the stage are two familiar faces, the hosts of OAOAST Syndicated (check time and local listings)… [img=http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v82/papacita/OAOAST/syndicatedannouncers.jpg] As to not reveal the brackets prior to the official announcement being made, the board displays the Anderson Cup logo -- a gold figurine of Arn Anderson performing his trademark throat slash. SCHIAVONE Hi again, everyone. Tony Schiavone and Jesse “The Body” Ventura here with you on this special occasion as we prepare to release the 2008 Anderson Cup brackets. Before we do that, why don’t you quickly go over the rules, Jesse. VENTURA Oh, right. As it has been the past two years, 16 teams will compete in a single elimination tournament for bragging rights and a shot at the One & Only World tag team titles at AngleMania VI. It’s WIN or GO HOME! But victory don’t mean championship gold. Two of the previous three Anderson Cup winners have gone down to defeat at the biggest show of the year, both times at the hands of Chicks Over Dicks. Luckily for all the teams this year, Schiavone, COD is no more! SCHIAVONE You’re exactly right. Alix Maria Spezia now dating Mackenzie DeCenzo. VENTURA Talk about a power couple. Bill and Hillary ain’t got nothing on them. SCHIAVONE But we have something for you, the 2008 Anderson Cup bracket! CUE: Trumpet Fanfare [b][color="#FF0000"]BOOM~![/color] [color="#4169E1"]BOOM~![/color] [color="#FFA500"]BOOM~![/color] [color="#00FF00"]BOOM~![/color][/b] [color="#FF0000"][b]LOS INFERNALES CONFERENCE[/b][/color] Los Diablos de Fuego (1) vs. Nathaniel Black & Jamie O‘Hara (8) Beverly Hills Blonds (4) v. Christ Air Express (5) Team Heyross (3) vs. Deuce Deuce Bigelow & Jumbo (6) LSGS/Heavenly Rockers (2) vs. South Central Militia (7) [b][color="#2E8B57"]MIRACLE WEIRDNESS CONNCECTION CONFERENCE[/color][/b] Theodore Moneymaker & Christian Wright (1) vs. Rescue 911 (8) D*LUX (4) v. James Blonde & Faqu (5) Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew (3) v. Love Doctors (6) ?? (2) v. Los Conquistadors (7) SCHIAVONE Some very interesting match-ups Jess. VENTURA I’d say. The top seeds in each conference are no surprise as they were last year's finalists. What is a surprise is the pairing of [i]Nathaniel Black and Jamie O‘Hara[/i], if you can believe that. Both 2-7 bouts are intriguing for that matter. You have a mystery team in the MWC two hole, and then you got the loser of the Heavenly Rockers-Lone Star Gunslingers tag title match at the New Year’s Spectacular booked in the LI Conference. I gotta hand it to the Anderson Cup committee; they put together one helluva tournament. SCHIAVONE Aren’t you part of that committee, Jesse? VENTURA I don’t mean to brag…but yeah! My first year, along with Tony Brannigan and a couple of the old-timers in the back. Come on, Schiavone. Tell me. What do you find most intriguing about this year’s cup? SCHIAVONE A lot to be quite honest. Two teams I’d look out for are the Christ Air Express and Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew. Both have held championships in other promotions, with Marv and Mel being former OAOAST tag titleholders as well. But I’d -- as I’m sure everyone here and at home would as well -- love to know who's the mystery team facing Los Conquistadors in the MWC. VENTURA Take my word for it. You’re going to love it. Just to whet your appetite a bit: it’s a team no one thought they’d see again. SCHIAVONE You’re such a tease. Anyway, fans, I have been informed of the first two matches that will take place right here next week on TSM. For the LIC it’ll be the Beverly Hills Blonds against the Christ Air Express and for the MWC, Los Conquistadors vs. the team Jesse Ventura says we thought we’d never see again. Until then, that’ll do it for us. HeldDOWN~! returns after this timeout. [font="Arial Black"][color="#FF0000"]New Year's[/color] [color="#0000FF"]Spectacular[/color][/font] [color="#FF8C00"][font="Arial Black"]FIRST ROUND ANDERSON CUP ACTION[/font][/color] [b]Beverly Hills Blonds vs. Christ Air Express & ?? vs. Los Conquistadors[/b] [color="#9932CC"][font="Arial Black"]THURSDAY NIGHT, JANUARY 3rd, LIVE ONLY ON TSM![/font][/color]

2008 Anderson Cup brackets revealed Courtesy of OAOAST Syndicated: Confrontation between the Heavenly Rockers & Lone Star Gunslingers

Dark blue lights flash across the entry way, as the stage fills with smoke. Through the haze steps the SCM, Vincent letting out a primal roar, while One Eye flashes gang signs as Tupac's "Dopefiend's Diner" plays. They make their way to the ring, talking trash to the jeering crowd. BUFFER The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, at a total combined weight of 460 pounds, from South Central Los Angeles and former tag team champions of the world... THE SOUTH. CENTRAL. MILLLIIITTIIIIIAAAAAA!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE The South Central Militia, one of sixteen teams participating in the 2008 Anderson Cup that will begin on January 3rd at the New Year‘s Spectacular. OAOAST officials currently finalizing the brackets, which will be released next week on HeldDOWN~! Before they can start thinking about the Anderson Cup, they’ll first need to get by their opponents tonight, as we toss it back to Michael Buffer. “Thriller” by Fall Out Boy hits and the fans come out of their seats in excitement. BUFFER Their opponents, accompanied by everybody’s favorite gal pal MELODY NERDLY...from San Antonio, Texas, total combine weight 497 pounds, Baron Windels and the "Texas Twister" Jock Mulligan... THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGEERRRRRSSSS!! “YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Lots of hand slapping follows, as the Gunslingers play to the audience. COLE Melody Nerdly leading perhaps the next tag team champions to the ring, Coach. COACH Yeah, [I]perhaps[/I]. But standing by right now, [I]the[/I] One & Only World tag team champions, the Heavenly Rockers. [color="#FF8C00"][b]* SWOOSH *[/b][/color] Wide shot, small box at left hand corner. Heavenly Rockers in front of their CG backdrop with Holly and Colonel Abdullah. HOLLY As fall becomes winter, the greatest rock ‘n’ wrestling band of all-time plan on turning up the heat. Ain’t that right, baby? LOGAN Congratulations are in order sayeth Logan Usher Mann. At the New Year’s Spectacular the Heavenly Rockers will defend their One & Only World tag team championship against Little Red Riding Hood’s big, bad wolves, the Lone Star Gunslingers. But it’ll be second verse, same as the first, Gunslingers. Victory will be ours! SYNTH Now put that in yo pipe and smoke it! The brief piece of video ends with Synth :headbang: while the Colonel gives praise. [color="#FF8C00"][b]* SWOOSH *[/b][/color] COLE Very confident are the Heavenly Rockers. COACH As they should be. If they don’t own, they’re leasing the Lone Star Gunslingers. Referee Nick Patrick orders a member of each team on the apron, and those men are Moe and Jock. Whereas the SCM trade gang signs, the Gunslingers stick with the traditional double high-five. * DINGDINGDING * Backed against the ropes after placing Moe in a side headlock Baron is shot across the ring, but One-Eye makes the all too common heel mistake of setting too soon, enabling the Gunslinger to pop him straight up with a hard kick to the shoulder. Windels plants his feet and drills Wallace with a standing dropkick. Irish whip, and a big-time FLYING LARIAT to follow! ONE... TWO... Wallace kicks out and retreats to the safety of his corner, and makes the tag to Vincent Santana who calls out Jock Mulligan. COLE You know the Texas Twister won’t back down from a challenge. The crowd pops as Jock accepts the tag. After circling the ring to measure their opponent up, the two lock horns and Jock comes out on top with an arm-wringer. Mulligan uses a series of closed fists and bonic elbows to punish the right arm of Santana. Vinnny maneuvers the second year man into the corner and stuns him with a back elbow to the side of the head. Santana sells the damage to the arm before working Jock over in the corner with a combination of jabs and uppercuts. Mulligan fires back with kicks to the midsection and bionic elbows, only to have Vinny RAKE THE EYES. Irish whip, but Jock ducks a clothesline and shoots back on the rebound with a CROSSBODY BLOCK...but Vincent crotches down as Jock soars through the air, causing the Texas Twister to feel like he's just been in one as he lands hard on the canvas and rolls out of the ring from the impact! COACH Jock’s in a bad place, Cole. The SCM not afraid to bend the rules every so often. COLE More like any chance they get. Like right now. As the referee focusing his attention on keeping Vincent inside, outside Moe slams Jock on the arena floor. Baron rushes to his partner's aid, chasing Wallace away…but that grabs the eye of Nick Patrick and leaves the SCM with another opportunity to take advantage of the youngster, whipping him into the ring steps! COLE How many times do I need to say it? We need more than one referee for matches such as this! Before the SCM can inflict anymore damage, the referee turns around and orders Vinny inside. The SCM coolly toss Jock back into the ring, but not before sneaking in a pair of knees to the ribs! COACH Ha! Beautiful. Quick tag by the S-C-M. They're putting the 5-second rule to good use as they Irish whip Jock. Oh, baby! STEREO DIVING SHOULDERBLOCKS! COLE What force! ONE... TWO... KICKOUT! Moe rams Jock face-first into the turnbuckle, then tags out. Vinny SLAPS Baron to sucker him inside, allowing him and Moe to pummel Jock in the corner. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Santana continues to antagonize Baron as One-Eye CHOKES Jock with the TAG ROPE! COLE Moe’s strangling the life out of Jock Mulligan. Somebody needs to put a stop to this! Baron steps in and is confronted by Nick Patrick, who he desperately pleads to turn around. Going nowhere with his efforts Baron finally has enough and brushes the ref aside. The crowd roars as Windels beats the hell out of the SCM, then HIP TOSSES HIS PARTNER TOWARDS THEIR CORNER FOR THE TAG! "YEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!" MELODY (firing imaginary pistols) Hee-yaw! One can’t deny the toughness of the SCM as they both charge Baron, who quickly shows them why he's called a Gunslinger, coming strong at Moe and Vinny with Texas size right hands and scoop slams. Moe rolls out to the arena floor while Vinny takes a seat on Baron's knee from an inverted atomic drop. Windels whips Santana, the legal man, to the ropes for a BAAAAAACK bodydrop. Now up top Baron connects with a TOP ROPE LARIAT! ONE... TWO... THR-- NO!! Moe pulls Baron halfway out of the ring before being spun around and decked by a Jock Mulligan DISCUS PUNCH! Meanwhile, inside, Baron sits Vinny on the top turnbuckle and delivers his patent SUPERPLEX!!! ONE… TWO… THREE! * DINGDINGDING * BUFFER Here are your winners… THE LONE GUNSLINGEERRRRRSSSS!! “YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” The guys celebrate with Melody as Coach narrates the replay. COACH …for the 1-2-3. Now let’s go to Michael Cole ringside with Melody Nerdly and the Lone Star Gunslingers. Melody wipes the sweat off Jock and Baron’s bodies and flicks it at Michael Cole just for the fun of it. Obviously thrilled with the W is she. COLE Thanks very much, Coach. And gentlemen, mighty impressive win just now. I’d say a good test heading into your big title match with the Heavenly Rockers at the New Year’s Spectacular. JOCK We’re as battle tested as they come, Michael Cole. The Heavenly Rockers thought they could bully us around, but we showed them and everyone watching that when you knock the Lone Star Gunslingers off their saddles we dust ourselves and get back on. Tell ‘em B. BARON 14 days, Heavenly Rockers. 14 days until the Lone Star Gunslingers achieve their goal of becoming World tag team champions. We’ve waited months for this opportunity and for it to come against the Heavenly Rockers makes it all that much sweeter. Synth, Logan, you’re in for one helluva an ass kickin’ at the New Year’s Spectacular. MELODY Yeah! :P With that, the Gunslingers and Melody exit. [font="Arial Black"][color="#FF0000"]New Year's[/color] [color="#0000FF"]Spectacular[/color][/font] [color="#FF8C00"][font="Arial Black"]ONE & ONLY WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH[/font][/color] [b]The Lone Star Gunslingers challenge the Heavenly Rockers[/b] [color="#9932CC"][font="Arial Black"]THURSDAY NIGHT, JANUARY 3rd, LIVE ONLY ON TSM![/font][/color]

Imagine that, me actually posting in the booking thread! Heavenly Rockers promo LSGS vs. SCM

BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the ONE & ONLY WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP! [size="3"][color="#FF00FF"][b]It's raining men - Hallelujah It’s raining men - Amen[/b][/color][/size] Pink and yellow lights flash across the arena as Los Diablos dance out with each other, bumping and grinding on the way down the ramp and getting a little nasty with some of the male fans in the front rows. One lucky dude receives Moracca’s sombrero and a kiss on the cheek from both Diablos. BUFFER Introducing first, the challengers…from beautiful, sunny Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, total combine weight 350 pounds… LOS DIABLOS DE FFFFFUUUUUEEEEEEEGGOOOOOOOOOO!! “YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Now in the ring, Mariachi stares seductively into the camera while sucking on the middle prong of his pitch fork. COLE Here with go with the continuation of a feud that started a couple months back when the Heavenly Rockers heinously attacked Los Diablos in order to send a message to those who seek their World tag team championship. After a couple of weeks away Los Diablos returned with vengeance on their minds, much like another team, the Lone Star Gunslingers who on Wednesday, January 3rd, 2008 will face the Heavenly Rockers no matter tonight’s outcome at the New Year’s Spectacular. COACH Ask and you shall receive. The Gunslingers wanted a shot at the Heavenly Rockers, and now they have it. It’s going to be second verse, same as the first. [i][size=4][color="#FF0000"][b]HEY WAIT I GOT A NEW COMPLAINT![/b][/color][/size][/i] BUFFER Now playing, COLONEL ABULLAH NERDLY presents in association with HOLLY-WOOD the GREATEST rock 'n' wrestling band of AAAAALLLL-time, the reigning and defending tag team champions of the woooorld...THE HEAVENLYYYYYYY RRRRRROOOOOOOOOCCKKEEEEEEERRRRRRRSSSSSSS! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Synth and Logan feed off the crowd’s hostility, agitating numerous spectators on their jog down the ramp. COLE What a year it’s been for these men. They started as one of the most popular tag teams in the OAOAST, and they’ll finish 2007 as the most hated. COACH Sure they lost a fan here and there, but look at what they got in return -- the One & Only World tag team championship. You can’t argue with results. * DINGDINGDING * Synth and Moracca start out with a collar-and-elbow tie-up, and the Synthmeister muscles him to the ground, but the flaming luchador is able to use his speed to escape and return to a vertical base. Synth nods in sign of respect, then kicks Moracca in the gut as they lean in to lockup. Big right hand staggers the masked man, who Synth introduces to the turnbuckle. Caught in the wrong side of town Moracca quickly fights out of the Heavenly Rockers corner, knocking the champions on their asses! Synth and Logan charge at Moracca, but Mariachi comes in to even the odds and a pier-six brawl breaks loose! “YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” On the receiving end of an ass-kicking the Heavenly Rockers bail to the floor. Holly lifts Logan’s spirit with a peck on the lips and a shoulder massage as Colonel Abdullah instructs his men on how to proceed. COLE The Colonel trying to calm Synth and Logan the best he can, as Los Diablos have come ready to fight. And it’s not hard to figure out why with the tag titles on the line. The action resumes with Logan Mann as the legal participant, and he sweeps Moracca off his feet with a leg trip. Logan tries grabbing the leg but Moracca shuns his attempts again and again. Logan continuing to go to the well despite the sign that reads out of water, figuratively speaking of course. Mann slows the pace at the order of Colonel Abdullah, locking up with Moracca only to be placed in a side headlock. A tag is made and Logan immediately backs away to avoid a double-team. *clap*clap*clap*clap* As Leon Rodez did last week, Mariachi rallies the crowd behind him, irking the greatest rock ’n’ wrestling band of all-time. Logan wins the lockup that ensues, trapping Mariachi in a headlock of his own, but he’s shot off into the ropes and floored by a dropkick! Logan shakes it off and hooks ‘em up again, this time going under to apply a hammerlock…which Mariachi counters with a drop toehold and a yell of “GIDDY UP” as he rides the Macho MACHO Mann, slapping that ass like only he can! “YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” COACH The indignity of it all. Logan complains to the ref, who actually warns Mariachi about his actions, allowing Mann to blindside him! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Mariachi’s worked over in the corner and shot across to other, but he displays that flexible body of his and floats over the top as Logan charges in, nailing him with a dropkick flush to the jaw! Synth enters and meets the same result. Scoop and a slam x2 for the Heavenly Rockers, causing the champions to hightail it again! COLE Los Diablos have the champions flustered, Coach. They didn’t prepare for this line of attack. COACH Absolutely not. When you talk about Los Diablos you think high flying, but tonight it’s a whole other story. It’s no secret the Heavenly Rockers aren’t the most polished wrestlers in the world. They’re more of a brawling type with a few moves thrown in and Los Diablos know that and are exploiting it. Sound strategy from the flaming luchadors, if you can believe that. Single-leg trip enables Mariachi to drag Synth to the corner. Los Diablos tag in their special way (kiss on the cheek) and then use Synth to make a wish! The Synthmeister rolls out to the floor and lies on his back in pain, kicking his legs in a cartoonish matter until Moracca flattens him with a CANNONBALL SPLASH FROM THE APRON!! “YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Synth is tossed back in and covered. ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Tag made, and Los Diablos whips Synth in for a DOUBLE TILT-A-WHIRL PANCAKE! ONE… TWO… SAVE BY LOGAN! Logan and Mariachi get into it, causing the referee to get in between as Moracca executes a beautiful flying head scissors takedown on Synth. Then a second one, but Logan breaks away from the ref/Mariachi and grabs the back of Moracca’s head as he leaps over the top and clotheslines the flaming luchador down on the rope! “OH!” Illegal switch by the champions and Logan puts the boots to Moracca, laying the badmouth to him in the process. Irish whip, but Moracca reverses and Logan counters with a spinning neck breaker on the rebound! ONE… TWO… THR-- KICKOUT! LOGAN :huh COL. ABDULLAH :firedevil: Logan rams Moracca into the knee of Synth and tags out. Synth throws Moracca outside and SPITS IN MARIACHI’S FACE, baiting him inside as Holly whips his partner towards Logan for a big clothesline! COACH There’s the key to a successful marriage, Cole -- communication. Another illegal switch by the Heavenly Rockers and Logan makes Moracca pay with a top rope axe handle smash. ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Moracca’s sent for the ride and placed in a lost treasure of wrestling, the ABDOMINAL STRETCH (we can only go so far with backstage segments to kill 2 hours of TV). If the hold wasn’t painful enough, Synth gives Logan extra leverage by pulling on his hand. COLE Look behind you, ref. What are you, blind? From Cole’s lips to referee Earl Hebner’s ears, but the Heavenly Rockers improvise as they’re about to be caught in the act and tag. A scoop and a slam later, the Synthmeister heads to the middle rope and drops the elbow…ON NOTHING BUT CANVAS! “YYEEEAAAAHHHHH!” Synth’s gone as quick as he entered, tagging out in favor of Logan. The Macho MACHO Mann sprints across and decks Mariachi to prevent the tag. Rude Awakening-style neck breaker leaves Moracca prone in mid-ring as Logan ascends to the heavens for his patent double knee drop…BUT MORACCA GETS THE KNEES UP!! “YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Now Logan’s in the same position Synth was earlier, kicking his legs in agony. As Moracca nears his corner Synth enters and drops a big elbow across the shoulder blades, then drags him back towards the Heavenly Rockers corner. Synth rolls Logan onto the apron and assumes his role in the match despite no tag and in front of the referee no less! COLE You’ve got to be kidding me. COACH (laughs) I guess he really is blind. Moracca is scooped for another slam, but he rolls through for a SMALL PACKAGE! ONE… TWO… NO, Logan rolls Synth over on top. ONE… TWO… NO, Moracca regains the momentum. ONE… TWO… NO! Both men chalk up numerous near falls as they roll around jockeying for position, soon finding themselves in Los Diablos’ corner where Moracca is able to make the tag (the conventional way)! “YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Mariachi stuns the Synthmeister with a series of overhand chops. Irish whip, and Synth is leveled by a spinning wheel kick. Logan is caught entering with one as well. The flaming luchador follows a pair of body slams with a DOUBLE COCONUT! “HOMIES!” “HOMIES!” “HOMIES!” COLE The crowd solidly behind Los Diablos de Fuego. COACH Of course they are. We’re in San Francisco. Chaos ensues with all 4 men in the ring. The Heavenly Rockers collide after being whipped in towards each other, knocking Logan out to the floor. Not far behind is Moracca, who crashes down onto the Macho MACHO Mann with a SPRINGBOARD SEATED SENTON! COACH All hell’s breaking loose, Cole. I don’t even know who the legal men are anymore. Although I bet it makes Los Diablos feel right at home. Inside, Moracca lifts Synth up in a pump handle and slams him on the side. Unfortunately for the Synthmeister there was no sign that said SLIPPERY WHEN WET! ONE… TWO… THREE! NO!! Holly and the Colonel yank Moracca out to the floor. * BOOM * Big right hand for the Colonel sends the crowd into a frenzy. Holly’s spared Moracca’s wrath but not Synth, who stumbles into a SPRINGBOARD CROSS BODY! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Moracca locks his hands together and brings them up to his chest for an up and down motion, apparently signaling for the dreaded SODOMIZER. COLE Spike tombstone piledriver coming up. Moracca positions himself in the middle of the ring to keep Synth away from the ropes and everyone associated with the Heavenly Rockers at bay. Perched on top Mariachi becomes distracted as Holly climbs onto the apron demanding to speak with referee Earl Hebner. As the two chat off to the side, Colonel Abdullah grabs Mariachi’s foot, diverting his attention long enough for Logan Mann to… * THUNK * …drop down on Moracca with a TOP ROPE AXE HANDLE SMASH USING THE RING BELL!! The flaming luchador falls back with Synth on top as Logan knocks Mariachi to the floor with a WICKED LEFT HOOK~! COLE No, damnit! The Heavenly Rockers are going to steal this one. ONE… TWO… THREE! [i][size=3][color="#FF0000"][b]HEY WAIT I GOT A NEW COMPLAINT![/b][/color][/size][/i] BUFFER The winners of the match… THE HEAVENLYYYYYYY RRRRRROOOOOOOOOCCKKEEEEEEERRRRRRRSSSSSSS! COLE There’s no bell to be rung. Los Diablos were on the verge of winning the tag titles, but the Heavenly Rockers managed to snatch victory out of the jaws of defeat. Unbelievable. COACH Never underestimate the heart of a champion, baby boy. COLE Give me a break. In fact, we gotta take one right now!

BUFFER Wrestling fans, it is now time for the FAMILY FEUD mixed tag match! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" [i][size=4][color="#FF0000"][b]HEY WAIT I GOT A NEW COMPLAINT![/b][/color][/size][/i] "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" BUFFER Currently making their way to the ring, Colonel Abdullah Abir Nerdly presents one-half of the World tag team champions and his lovely bride … LOGAN “Macho MACHO” MANN and “THE ANGEL OF DEATH” … HOLLY-WOOD!! Uneventful entrance as Logan whisks Holly down the aisle. COLE As fans of our syndicated OAOAST Pro Wrestling telecast witnessed this past weekend, Logan Mann went on a verbal tirade when our broadcast colleague Tony Schiavone brought up the subject of November Reign, claiming Rodez’s victory was a fluke. COACH It was a fluke. Plus Rodez had a handful of tights. COLE He did not! CUE: "Rock The Casbah" by Trust Company BUFFER Their opponents, hailing from Grand Rapids, Michigan…total combine weight 358 pounds, the brother/sister combination of LEON and JADE RRRRROOOOOOODDEEEEEEEZZZZZZ!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!! Always the life of the party, Leon and Jade go around slapping hands with their fans before hopping on the apron for a joint pose. As both hold out their arms triumphantly, Logan charges forward and knocks Leon off the apron with a RUNNING KNEE TO THE BACK, sending the Silky Smooth One crashing into the guardrail below! JADE :o * DINGDINGDING * Jade shrieks in horror as the Angel of Death yanks her over the top and delivers a devastating clothesline. Outside, Leon is thrown into the crowd after being dropped throat-first on the guardrail, and then is slammed on the concrete floor! COACH It’s November Reign all over again, Cole, expect Rodez won’t be able to squeak out the win. Despite warnings from referee Charles Robinson, Holly stomps Jade in the place babies come from and :lol: at her pain. COLE Holly totally disregarding the rulebook-- in front of the referee no less! She and Logan don’t care about winning, they just want to punish their opponents. The Angel of Death backs Jade in the corner and… “WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” …chops her hard across the chest. “WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Again. “WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” And again. Then slams her. Holly mimics the mannerisms of her husband as she straddles the second rope, spreading her arms out to the side before take-off…BUT JADE MOVES AND HOLLY SPIKES HER KNEE INTO THE CANVAS!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Even a wrestling novice such as J-Ro knows what to do next, and that’s applying the FIGURE-4 LEGLOCK! COLE The crowd is on their feet as Jade Rodez looks to make Holly tap with the figure-4. Within seconds of the hold’s application Logan Mann is perched on the top, but LEON RODEZ shoves him down!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" The Grand Rapids Golden Child removes his robe and chases after Logan, who uses Charles Robinson as a human shield. As Leon and Charles become tangled up, Logan stomps on Jade and tags in. COACH Logan, no! COLE A huge mental lapse on the part of Logan Usher Mann. He automatically made Leon Rodez the legal man by tagging in as this bout is being contested under mixed tag rules, meaning the men vs. the men and women vs. women. *clap*clap*clap*clap* Having gotten the crowd involved Leon is ready to lockup, but Logan is not, citing an unsafe working environment. Charles Robinson begs to differ and orders Logan to fight. The Macho MACHO Mann wipes his hands on the side of his trunks and leans in, only to pull back as Leon steps forward. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Logan regains his composure and locks horns with Rodez, and then drives the knee into the midsection, doubling over the Silky Smooth One. A combination of jabs to the face/body rock Leon’s world, but he recovers in time to duck under a bionic elbow and land a JAB of his own! Followed by a second, a third and a fourth. COACH Uh-oh. Leon blows the crowd a kiss, then drills Mann upside the head with an ENZIGURI~! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" COLE Mama Said Knock You Out! Rodez drags Mann towards the center and covers. ONE… TWO… NO! Holly makes the save…and gets decked by a jumping forearm smash from Jade! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Force to restrain the youngest member of the Rodez family, Charles Robinson doesn’t see the LOW BLOW that drops Leon to his knees. To add insult to injury Logan delivers an inverted atomic drop, and then connects with his patent running axe handle smash. ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Logan badmouths the New-Age Love Machine as he chokes him, breaking on 4 and a half. The Macho MACHO Mann rams Leon into the turnbuckle, then shoots him across…but Rodez avoids a corner back elbow and plants Logan with an EXPLODER SUPLEX! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Irish whip, but Logan reverses and Leon counters with a kick to the shoulder and an INVERTED LUNGBLOWER! ONE… TWO… Save by Holly. Leon ascends to the top and soars through the air, wiping Logan out with a beautiful FLYING CROSSBODY…BUT LOGAN ROLLS THROUGH AND HOOKS THE TIGHTS!! ONE… TWO… THR-- NO! Rodez kicks out and ducks a wicked left hook, and takes Mann down for the LIONTAMER, only to have Holly pop him as he tries to turn Logan over. LEON :huh: Leon cocks his fist and points to Holly, then puckers up. COACH Touch her and you’re a dead man, Rodez. Logan doesn’t like anyone touching his property. With such tempting options it’s hard to chose, so Leon lets the crowd decide for him. Fist or lips? “FIST!” “LIPS!” Leon thanks the crowd for their input but takes what’s behind him instead, tagging his baby sister Jade. "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" J-Ro SPEARS Holly and hammers away. The Angel of Death covers up as best as she can, but Jade is ferocious in her attack, not letting up one bit. She whips Holly to the buckle and follows in, spiking both knees into the chest. Holly stumbles out and is placed in a COBRA CLUTCH, then driven straight back on Jade’s knee! ONE… TWO… THR-- NO! “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Logan grabs Jade by the ankles and crotches her on the ringpost! Leon isn’t cool with that and floors Logan. They brawl on the arena floor as Holly plants Jade with a TWISTING FISHERMEN’S SUPLEX! COACH Rodeo Driver! Leon goes to breakup the pin… ONE! TWO! …but is too late. THREE! * DINGDINGDING * BUFFER Here are your winners… LOLLY! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Kneeling over his sister, Leon’s blindside by a top rope axe handle smash from Logan, who along with Holly proceed to put the boots to him. "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!! Before anymore damage can be done the LONE STAR GUNSLINGERS and MELODY NERDLY hit the ring. Needless to say, Lolly bail, but it doesn’t stop Logan from talking smack on his way up the ramp. COLE I doubt this is the last we’ve heard of this. More HeldDOWN to come after this time out.

Family Feud Match Lolly (Logan Mann & Holly-Wood) vs. Leon & Jade Rodez

No problem. I left a space before the Krista segment in post 3 and for your promo in post 5. Or you can flip those around depending on your promo (like if it's to hype the tag match or something).

Yeah, 12/1 is the date. I've already put most of the show together in GCF so I won't be in a rush tomorrow.

DING DING DING Valentine strides towards Biff for a lockup. However, Atlas has little intentions on starting the contest on even footing and smashes his boot into his foe's midsection. As Vinny's blubber jiggles wildly from the assault, Biff snatches him into a side headlock. After a quick nod of satisfaction towards Moneymaker, Biff flings the disco duck over with a headlock takedown. Vinny crashes into the canvas with a thud, and his neck snaps awkwardly against Biff's grip. Despite this, he's able to kip up and power his way out the hold. Unfortunately he doesn't succeed in doing much more then that, as Atlas delivers an insulting smack to his cheek! Biff then punishes Vinny with a round of clubbing forearms. The shots sting mightily, and weaken Valentine to his knees, as he struggles to escape the raw power of his rival. His venture takes him towards the ropes, where he's forced to tighten his hand around the middle cable in order to support himself. But Biff makes these efforts futile ones by clubbing Vinny down to the mat. With Valentine crippled by the strikes, Atlas drops on top of him for a pin that's scored by Charles Robinson..... ONE! TWO! But Vinny kicks out, drawing applause from The Docs and Shayne, and wonderement from Krista, who can't quite figure out why John Travolta is on her team. Atlas scrapes Vinny off the mat by his gaudy pants, and shoots him into a neutral corner. The disco machine manages to stave off a nasty collision with the ring posts by clamping down on the ropes and skidding his snakeskin boots to a halt. Apparently he finds this to be a noteworthy achievement as evidenced by his decision to turn to the audience and ask, “IF YOU LIKE DISCO MUSIC THEN LET VINNY V HEAR YA!” “Disco Stu likes Disco Music!” Biff obviously is no fan of the disco, as evidenced by the fact that he smashes Valentine's body into the ropes with a bodysplash. While Vinny slumps to the canvas as though he's been hit by a bullet train, Atlas begins going through a tai-chi routine to keep him closer to mother earth. “CUM SERVICING SLUT QUEENS!” Tony screams, which somehow Krista takes as an invitation to jump off the apron and try and leave. “Miss Krista, where are you going?” Shayne asks. “I'm going to go drink the beers required to make that dude's gimmick entertaining.” Pleased by his decimation of Vinny, Biff tags in Mister Moneymaker, and even goes as far as to hold open the ropes for the Billion Dollar Heir. While, Moneymaker may get the royal treatment from the former NRG member, the capacity crowd is much less warm and their hatred comes fast and heated. “MONEYMAKER SUCKS! MONEYMAKER SUCKS! MONEYMAKER SUCKS!” “SILENCE!” Christian screams, and of course gets the exact opposite of the word he called for. Paying no mind to the rantings of the audience, Moneymaker saunters into the ring with an elbow drop with Vinny's name on it. Unfortunately that Vinny must not have the last name Valentine, as the disco duck manages to slide away from the incoming bomb. Moneymaker's arm slams off the canvas, etching a look of deep frustration onto his rugged facial features. Having little desire to cross a billionaire, Vinny quickly scurries to his corner and allows Doctor Stephen Pigley into the affair. Pigley attempts to make a flashy entrance into the affair by launching a slingshot cross body block at his rival. But Moneymaker is well prepared for the assault, and Pigley lands harmlessly into his arms. What's not so harmless for the studmuffin is the fall forward slam Moneymaker punishes him with! Crushed beneath the massive girth of the tycoon, Pigley hollers out in pain, painting a toothy grin across Moneymaker's face. “MONEY TALKS, BULLSHIT WALKS!” Moneymaker bellows as he bounds towards the ropes. When he reaches the cables, he swipes Brave with a cheapshot, and as the fans jeer his audacity he storms back with his fist angled for Pigley's handsome face. Without giving the buff stud a second to sheild his features, Moneymaker's body screams downward and smashes the doc with the Fistful of Dollars “BOOOOOOO!” Robinson warns against Moneymaker's usage of a closed fist, but encounters the trouble of Mackenzie trying to convince him that it was more of a one-handed downward mongolion chop full of dollars then a fistful. Moneymaker doesn't seem overly concerned with the admonishments, and instead peacocks about the ring, singing, “CHING-CHA-CHING-CHA-CHING MONEY LOVES ME AND I LOVE IT! CHING-CHA-CHING-CHA-CHING, THERE'S NO ONE IN THE WORLD THAT I LOVE MORE! CHING-CHA-CHING-CHA-CHING I'D SELL MY OWN SOUL FOR A DOLLAR OR FOUR!” Worried, Alix looks to Mackenzie, “Uh, does he do that often?” “Usually he does it in poetry format. And BUTT naked.” Done with his mini-concert, and thankfully fully clothed, Moneymaker drapes his arm across Pigley's chest for a pinfall... ONE! TWO! However, Pigley shoots his shoulder upward! Hastily, he pulls himself off the canvas, but finds no moment to attack, thanks to the carefully timed punches Moneymaker lays into his shredded stomach. Having been quickly weakened by the powerful attacks, Pigley can't prevent the heir to the Moneymaker fortune from snagging him into a front facelock. And as Moneymaker drags him into the sky for a vertical suplex, all he can do is brace for an impact that turns out to be monumentally painful! COACH Even the most basic moves look sweeter when their done by a billionaire! Moneymaker peels his foe off the canvas, and shoots him into the ropes. Once the MD makes his return, Moneymaker's golden boot plants itself into his midsection. The affects of the attack are crippling, doubling Pigley over and leaving him paralyzed. The moneyed man takes quick advantage of Pigley's weakened state, grabbing onto his neatly parted hair and simply slamming him backwards to the canvas. The detestable move is cause for celebration from the Yale alum, as he parades around the ring, performing his infamous money fingers gesture. “MONEYMAKER SUCKS! MONEYMAKER SUCKS! MONEYMAKER SUCKS!” After scowling at the audience, Moneymaker attempts a second pinfall... ONE! TWO! But, Pigley kicks out and pays for it with no less then eight punches to his handsome face. Leaving Pigley behind to attend to a nearly broken nose, Moneymaker retreats his corner to bring his trusted bodyguard, Christopher Patrick Allen into the contest. COLE And here comes CPA, who has quietly put together an amazing won-loss record in 2007. And now he may loudly and violently dismantle Pigley in about seven seconds! As Pigley unsteadily rises to his feet, Allen aims to do just that, by throwing a lariat towards his head. The doctor regains enough of his wits to shoot bellow the oncoming strike and speed towards the ropes. The cables spit him back towards CPA far faster then he would've liked, preventing him from offering an offensive strike which leads to his downfall at the hands (or feet) of a big boot! Plummeted backwards to the canvas, Pigley emits a steady stream of anguished groans as his teammates (well four of them at least), begin a much needed attempt to rally him to victory. “OINK! OINK! OINK!” they chant, while Krista contemplates the logistics of executing a triple homicide. “Come on Miss Krista, let's here you oink!” Shayne implores her. “I'd sooner sleep with you then oink on national television.” SHAYNE “Errrrr....OINKOINKOINKOINK! MOOO! MOOO! QUACK! QUACK!” she spews. Krista's decision to support him rather then risk sleeping with Zac Effron's biggest fan, provides Doctor Pigley with all the encouragement he needs to battle upright. Unfortunately for him, that encouragement does nothing to hinder the burly bodyguard from steamrolling him with a thunderous shoulder tackle! “SCROTUM FACED SHIT BUBBLE!” Tony hollers. Noticing Krista's reaction to his cousin Vinny tries to make peace. “Uh, he has a disease.” “And I have a gun.” Back in the ring, Pigley slowly rises off the canvas. In spite of his considerable anguish, he tries to go on the attack by shooting his black boot towards the ex-boxer's midsection. But, Allen catches hold of his foot, and with a primitive snarl throws it back to the canvas. The simple counter pushes Pigley dangerously off balance, and he's left helpless as CPA mutilates him with a lariat! Quite happy with his thorough drubbing of his weak opponent, Allen celebrates with a round of shadow boxing. Upon finishing that bit of showmanship, Allen applies the tag to mother earth's favorite son, Biff Atlas. COACH Pigley bout to get dat ass swung on by an ol environmentally conscious nigga! Eying down Pigley much the same way a gluttonous lion eyes down his prey, Atlas patiently waits for his rival to rise. Once he does, Bono's Favourite Wrestler charges with full steam, leaping into the sky to strike down his foe with the Polar Knee Cap (running high knee). Pigley is bowled over by the trademark strike, and instantly clutches a face that has swelled towards deep purple hues. Not content with one nature-themed move, the former nutrition guru agilely hops onto the highest cable for his pattended earthsault. Before dismounting his roost the Biffster offers the viewing world a timely public service announcement, “AMERICA, GIVE A HOOT, PLEASE DON'T POLLUTE!” While the OAOAST brass wonders if they fired the wrong NRG member, Biff rockets through the skies with a graceful moonsault. Unfortunately, midway through his descent, his grey eyes observe his enemy slowly rolling out of position. Suddenly panic stricken, Biff adjusts course on his descent, and barely succeeds in landing on his aquamarine boots. The unexpected landing moves him slightly off balance, which provides Pigley with a perfect opportunity to tag in Doctor Anderson! COLE Paging Doctor Anderson! The doctors of doctornomics pair up on Atlas, each taking an arm and thrusting him into the ropes. Whatever feeling of gusto and bravado they were operating under are immediately annihilated by Atlas, as he returns to floor Pigley with a polish hammer. Watching his partner topple to mat draws rage onto Anderson's face, and he attempts to unleash his anger on his rival with a straight left. But Biff moves far to fast for the doctor, and zooms towards the ropes. They spit him back like a bat out of hell, and he easily mows down Anderson with a spear! COACH The Al GOORREE!! As Moneymaker and Wright applaud his performance, Atlas hooks the leg for a pin... ONE TWO But the snakeskin shoes of Vinny Valentine break up the pinfall. More annoyed, then angered by Valentine's interference, Biff casually rids himself of the disco maniac with a spine buster. Not bothering to pay the colorless corpse of Vinny a second glance, Atlas returns his attention back to Anderson and bounces off the ropes in preparation for another spear. As the dazed figure of the doc staggers off the canvas, Biff lowers his shoulder to lacerate his foe. But, much to his surprise and dismay, the good doctor slides out the way, and Atlas is left to destroy his shoulder against the steel ringposts. “OOOOOH!” Hollering for assistance, Biff stumbles away from his accident scene. He's desperate to apply a tag with his team, but as he turns to meet the waiting hand of Christian, he's dragged down by Pigley's rollup! ONE! TWO! THREE!!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Biff Atlas Eliminated by: Max Anderson (pinfall) Advantage: Team Krista, 5-4 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ At a loss for words to explain how he got eliminated by one half of a tag team that's won two matches in two years, a dejected Biff sulks to the backstage area. The audience gives Doctor Anderson a decent sized applause, but still aren't overly convinced the male members of Team Krista are anything but deadweight. COLE Just the fact that Team Krista has scored an elimination by someone other then the woman herself is cause for great celebration. COACH Yo, I ain't trynna dis Biff nothing, but he could've just as easily been an alternate for Team Krista. Moneymaker, you a billionaire, shoulda just paid Chris Stevens to be the fifth man. Disturbed by the fact that he won't see his predicted clean sweep, Moneymaker gruffly orders Wright into the ring to destroy the MD. Just as eager to see Team Krista's expected destruction as his boss, Wright throws himself over the ropes. But, he has little time acclimate himself to the ring before he's put under attack by punches from the muscle stud. Quickly weakened by the strikes, Wright is hurled into a neutral corner. His back skids off the turnbuckles, and he's dizzeledly staggered back towards Doc Anderson, who flattens him with a kobashi spinning back fist! COLE Now, Team Krista is cooking! COACH Two moves, one a rollup and the other a little twirling slap, after eight solid minutes of beatings is not what I would call cooking. Anderson tediously hauls his verbose foe off the mat, and traps him into a front facelock, setting up a vertical suplex. But before Wright's Brooks Brothers shoes can even leave the floor, he reverses Anderson's efforts into a suplex of his own! The studmuffin's attractive figure crunches into the canvas, drawing concerned gasps from several female audience members. Unwilling to yield on his assault, CW brings Anderson to his feet, then promptly drives him backwards with his second suplex. Rather then seek the customary third suplex, The Natural floats over for a pinfall.... ONE TWO Anderson shoots his shoulder off the canvas, a gutsy show of resiliency that earns him a face to face meeting with Wright's dress shoes. Eventually, Wright grabs onto Anderson's meticulously gelled hair and roughly hauls him to his feet. He twists Anderson's arm behind his back and slides his head through his right arm. CW continues to contort his rival by gripping hold his left leg. With the MD fully under his control, The Natural lifts him into the air, then dips sideways. Doctor Anderson's arm is snapped against the canvas, and then crushed beneath the descending two hundred twenty five pounds of the former HI-YAH world champion. “CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS!” COACH The Enterprise is back to beastin on these suckas. Biff Atlas hit a bump in the road, but this match has been all Team Alix the time. The object of the fans' intense hatred drags Doctor Anderson off the canvas, and stuns him with a succession of body blows. With the ex-stripper dazed by the attacks, Wright is able to foist him onto his shoulders for the Bank Roll (Rolling Fireman's Carry ) “Cower, pesants, your master has readied the bankroll!” Wright gloats. Informing your foe of your next move? Not a good idea. Informing him of it in words that involve more then two syllables? An even worse idea, as it provides Anderson with more then enough time to glide down Wright's back and snatch him into rear waistlock. Wright tries with great desperation to pry Doctor Anderson's death grip away from his stomach, but its too little too late, and the Windy City native upends him with a German suplex! “Egads, my neck!” Wright moans just moments after crashing into the floor. “I once stole a bra from sears because my mom wouldn't let me have one. I wrapped it around a telephone pole and practiced uhooking it, while I whispered sweet nothings into its ear. I made America's funniest home videos .” Alix states Mackenzie wonders, “Alix, honey, what does that have to do with anything?” “Nothing, I thought we were just swapping stories. Didn't realize this was all about Christian day! Sorry!” “Silence, you dolt!” Wright barks back. “Dolt? At least I'm smart enough to have sex with women! Hmph! What are you doing here anyway, shouldn't you be at the West Hollywood Y bobbing for boyfriends?” “ARGH!” He screams ferociously. Against any desire for teamwork in his body, he charges his annoying partner, ready to smash her into oblivion. Unfortunately his path to Alix encounters deathly roadblock in the form of an Anderson Spinebuster from the doctor of love! While Alix laughs at Wright's misfortune, and Mackenzie tries not to, Anderson delights the non-lesbians by gyrating that heavenly body. COACH Love Doctors is terrible. Type of generic ass jobbers that make me wish Doctor Jesus got up in they mamas' womb with a golden coat hanger. The voices of the cheering females are raised several octaves, as the little girls in attendance are delighted to see Shayne Brave tagged into the affair. However, they're far less pleased to watch him be eye raked by a suddenly recuperated Christian Wright. As the grade school contingent douses him with hatred, he snaps the cute boybander's arm down with an arm lock, then drags him into his corner. Despite the fact that there exists a large number of fans calling for Alix's arrival into the bout, Wright completely ignores his captain and slaps hands with Mister Moneymaker. “DEATH TO MONEYMAKER! DEATH TO MONEYMAKER!” While the billion dollar heir steps into the ring, Wright fastens Brave into a side russian leg sweep position. From there, Moneymaker positions himself behind the fresh faced youngster, and reaches over his shoulder to tighten his hands around his chin. Once Moneymaker's barks the signal, Wright rips himself and Brave backwards. The mogul follows suit, sinking to the canvas to batter Brave with a neckbreaker! Right as Showtime slides off his attackers' bodies, the little girls cry as if they just found out Hannah Montana was canceled. Moneymaker, on the other hand, finds Shayne's agony quite comical, and chuckles loudly as he pins him... ONE TWO Brave forcefully kicks out! “YEAAAAAAA!” Clutching his sore neck, Showtime Shayne pulls his figure off the mat. But he lifts himself directly into a boot to his thin stomach. Caught off guard by the strike, he stumbles awkwardly until wrestling's richest man traps him into place with an underhook. The adored teen idol is then ripped off his feet and smashed into the mat with a double arm suplex. Moneymaker then halts any possibilities of resurgence by pinning down Brave with his exquisitely decorated gold boots. Once he's assured the teenyboppin cutie is subdued, he charges towards the ropes, and returns to plant a Hogan-esque leg drop onto the teenybopper's throat! As Brave gasps for his rapidly fleeting air, Moneymaker continues his mocking of VH1 reality stars, by performing Hogan's famous ear cup routine. “DEATH TO MONEYMAKER! DEATH TO MONEYMAKER!” Having grown bored with beating on a teenager half his size, The Enterprise CEO tags Christian Wright back into the affair. COLE Is there a reason they're not tagging in their own team captain?? COACH Uh, maybe because they hate her guts, and are only tagging with her 'cause SuperLez Mackenzie made them. CW renters the ring in a flourishing velocity so fast that Shayne scarcely has a moment to register his charge before a running knife edge chop slams brutally into his chest! Krista tries to rally her hanger-on/stalker, “Come on, Shayne! You can do it! Cling to hope like Amy Winehouse claims to her final shred of dignity!” Heaving for breath, Brave courageously attempts to fight to his feet. But the task is made all but impossible when CW awkwardly bends his arm forward, and hooks Showtime's elbow underneath his shoulder. Reveling in Shayne's cries, the DC native attaches his hands to his black arm bands and presses down, generating more pressure. Brave spends a monumental amount of energy to break free, screaming and yelling while he tries to pull Wright's hand away from his. But, The Natural counteracts these efforts by straddling the boybander's skinny body, making escape a hugely difficult task. Without any hope of shredding Wright's vice grip, Brave is forced to use an especially dirty tactic. He drives his finger deep into CW's onyx eyes, earning a pained roar from Wright, but also earning his freedom. As the crowd continues to root him on, Showtime rushes towards the cables. Upon his return, the wordy grappler crushes all his momentum with a standing spear. He follows that signature hold up with a quick pin... ONE TWO But, Brave kicks out, pleasing the fanbase, but enraging Wright. He rips Brave off the canvas by his highlighted locks, and punishes him with another arm wrench. Brave emits a pained yelp, but his agony quickly grows worse as The Natural pulverizes the limb with a single arm DDT. Wright's highly pleased by his dominant performance, and signifies his strength by beating his fist into his chest. “WE LOVE SHAYNE! WE LOVE SHAYNE!” the little girls sing, trying to get him to remember what he's fighting for. Actually Shayne is fighting for the hot lesbian on the ring apron, who's trying her hardest to distract Wright. Bubblegum pink lips curved into charming smirk, Krista leans over the ropes, allowing Wright's widened eyes to rollick through the sweet valley of flesh that is her fabulously large twin peaks. “Hey, handsome, if you think these are impressive. How about I rip off my clothes and give you the type of lapdance Moneymaker's sister usually charges fifteen dollars or a brick of cocaine for in the alley behind Jack N The Box?” MONEYMAKER There's no honor amongst thieves and there seems to be no honor amongst guys who may have been breast fed for too long as child, because Wright predictably takes Krista's jiggling bait. But, as always is the case with Krista's fleshy trickery of Christian, Mister Wright is left with a serious case of blue balls and a major league headache thanks to the running bulldog Showtime Shayne strikes him with! “YEAAAAAA!” COLE Shayne just driving Christian Wright to the mat, and making a major play for his team. COACH That had nothing to do with his team, he just wanted to cut in line with for the lap dance! Coach may have point, but Shayne acts like a perfect gentlemen, performing a minor miracle in keeping his gaze off her chest, as he brings his celeb-crush into the match! “YEAAAAAAA!” the huge colors mean they like her! Less enamored with her presence is Mackenzie DeCenzo, who becomes even more disturbed when she notices a distinct gleam sparkling in Alix's eyes. Showing why she may be the only wrestler ever nominated for an Emmy, Krista cranks on the faux-tears of joy, and with arms reaching towards the roaring audience, pours her heartout to them, “I haven't had an orthodox career, and I've wanted more than anything to have your respect. The first time I didn't feel it, but this time I feel it, and I can't deny the fact that you like me, right now, you like me! You really like me!” “Uh, Krista?” Stephen notes. “Huh? Oh.” SUPERKICK TO WRIGHT! “Now where we? Ah, yes, Romeo and Juliet Act IV, scene 1. I begin. Shall I speak ill of him that is my husband? But wherefore, villain, didst thou kill my cousin? That villain cousin would have killed my husband. My husband lives, that Tybalt would have slain; And Tybalt's dead, that would have slain my husband.” Alix can't help but crack a soft smile at the fact that her ex-girlfriend has actually halted a match to recite classic English literature. Her current girlfriend? Not so amused. And her white heels quickly elevated her to the ring apron, where she appears ready to give Krista a piece of her mind. Krista comments, “Well, well, look what the cat, cleaned up, bathed, lipsticked, exfoliated, mascaraed, manicured, face lifted, tummy tucked, liposuctioned, Guccied up and dragged in. What's that? Are ya saying something to me? Sorry I'm not fluent in filthy skank. Someone tell Moneymaker's sister to leave the glory hole and come and translate!” MONEYMAKER Robinson joins Alix in trying to convince a heated Mackenzie to depart the ring apron. This massive distraction of having to calm the fury of a woman scorned, allows The Enterprise's director of security to sneak into the affair. He grabs Krista by the arm and shoots her into the ropes. When the blond beauty makes her return his elbow swings out in order to mangle her fetching features. But the plodding blow never comes close to reaching her, as she ducks bellow his mammoth arm. Her four hundred dollar heels journey her to the ring ropes, and she leaps on top of them, using them as a launching pad to spring board back at her rival. Allen tries to swat her out of the air, but again meets with failure, when her arms noose around his neck, and crush him into the canvas with an inverted ddt. “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” “Hey, I did that in heels, you can at least use a fancier font.” “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” Exasperated by the constant torment from his eternal archenemy, Moneymaker enters the fray to gain a whiff of revenge. Unfortunately all he gains is a whiff of her Valentino rock n rose perfume, as the fitness queen runs himover with a crowd thrilling high flipping lariat. Seemingly as delighted by the attack as the audience is Alix Maria Spezia, who does her best to try and hide her happiness for Krista's performance. But, Krista doesn't have any time notice the pleasure she's brought Alix, due to the fact that CPA has returned to life with a discus punch. Once more, Allen's movements are unbelievably slow, and the foxy mama easily rolls beneath his spinning frame. Her lovely legs then put her on the attack by whipping around, and smashing him with a wheel kick. However, the shot fails to floor Allen, and he remains upright, wobbling like the world's largest punching bag. This isn't much of problem for Krista; the buxom covergirl and she snakes her arms around his thick neck, and launches her body forward, leaving his unprotected face to collide with the mats at the hands of the Blonds Never Pay a Cover(side effect) “KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” Cheers quickly degenerate into boos, once the fans watch Wright shove (or ass grab if we're being frank) Krista to the canvas. But if there were any chance for Wright to earn payback on his long time scourge, its dumped to the wayside by the Love Doctors, who blast him with a double lariats! As the fans cheer their treatment of Wright, Steven (I always thought it was Stephen!) shoots The Natural's testicles into his chest cavity with a deliriously painful atomic drop. COACH Safe to say Wright won't be able to fall for anymore of Krista's tricks for a while. While Pigley keeps a whining Wright locked into place, Anderson builds up steam by running the ropes. Unable to break free of the ex-stripper's constricting bonds, CW can do nothing more then shriek in horror, as a pair of black boots scream towards his face! They smash into him like a battering ram, propelling him from Pigley's hold, and depositing him onto the canvas, where the crowd cheers his miserable demise. Mackenzie mutters to Alix, “Christian, screams like a woman.” “Don't flatter him he screams like a girl.” Above Wright's wretched corpse, the docs provide their starving female fans with the tasty treat they've been yearning for, writhing their smooth bodies through a spicy stripper routine. Alix happily comments, “Wow, Christian this is only slightly less embarrassing then then when you met John McCain at the young republicans meeting with a pee spot on your pants.” “Damnnation! It was Sprite!” "Yeah, maybe going in, dude." While Alix and Christian ignore the greater issue of why he can't control his bladder, Allen overtakes the dancing medical professionals with a pair of forearms. Anderson immediately sinks to the canvas, but. Pigley on the other hand remains upright, and tries to trade blows with the director of security. However, he's no Mike Tyson (or even Balrog from Street Fighter) and ends up getting ravaged by the lethal combination of crosses the ex-boxer tortures him with. Having wounded Pigley with basic attacks, Allen is free to move onto more devastating holds. Thus Allen splatters the much smaller grappler onto the canvas with a powerslam! Feeling Pigley's body sag into unconsciousness beneath him, Allen attempts a pinfall.... ONE! TWO! Vinny Valentine breaks up the pin by slashing the point of his elbow across Allen's bald head. But, the disco duck quickly pays the price for his meddling; Moneymaker loosens several of his teeth with a powerful $Billion Dollar Knee Lift$! He falls sideways, landing on the canvas with a harsh thud, as blood begins trickling from his lips. Thankfully he's spared from further thrashings as Krista Isadora Duncan introduces Moneymaker to the mats with a half nelson facecrusher. “YEAAAAAA!” In celebration of her victory, Krista shouts "They tryin to play the girl like shes saccarin. But ain't nothin sweet 'bout how i hold my gun I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one. COACH Hey, you know what I just realized? Biff Atlas really sucks. But, Krista finds her joy short lived, as she finally notices Alix failing to suppress a smile at her antics on the ring apron. Yet, this moment of distraction costs her dearly as the recovered Christian Wright flings her into a corner. Moving with a stunning grace and agility, the former Guns N Roses dancer leaps onto the third rope to avoid a disastrous crash with the turnbuckles. As she perches atop the turnbuckle, Wright feasts upon the delectable view of her perfectly toned BUTT framed by skimpy black panties. An ass that shines like the moon in a clear night sky. Round, firm and tan. A delightful grace and buoyance. Krista seems to notice Wright's admiration, and wiggles her tush, which just melts Wright into slobbering goo. Goo that's face crushed by Shayne Brave. Or would be face crushered, had Shayne not been distracted by the bootylicious bouncing on the top rope, and missed CW entirely. Ignoring, her admirer's pubescent stupidity, Krista exits her nest with a moonsault press! She crashes into Wright with incredible ferocity, and Robinson counts the ensuing pinfall... CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! Inexplicably, Tony Tourette pulls Krista out the ring! While, the fans may boo Tony's complete lack of common sense, Krista just sighs and says “I know, I know, you have a disease.” “CHRISTIAN WRIGHT TONGUED BATHED MY ASSHOLE!” Tony hollers. Back in the ring, Shayne Brave is locked into a loosing battle with the raw punching power of CPA. After nailing the boybander with a devastating body blow, Allen roughly wraps his tree trunk sized arms around his slender waist. As Brave feels like his body is about to be ripped in half by CPA's brute strength, he's lifted onto his shoulders in setup for the dominator! The audience holds their collective breath, fearful over the fate soon to befall the teen scream. But this horrific ending remains forever lost in their imaginations, because Showtime is rescued by the king of dance floor, Vinny Valentine. As happy as the audience is to see Shayne live to fight another day, CPA is every bit as incensed, and attempts to dismantle his annoying foes with a double lariat. But they counter his attack, by thrusting their boots into his midsection. The makeshift pair give the bruiser little time for a counterattack, as they quickly unload a round of kicks into his knees. The searing of pain of their strikes becomes too much for the Ohio native to bear, and his weakened legs sag him to the mat. Gasping in rage and fear, he watches while the pair retreats to opposite ropes. When they return his vision is clogged by the dropkicking boots of Brave, and the back of his head is decimated by the same maneuver from Valentine! Cheers scream from every inch of the beach front venue, as a lifeless Allen sinks to the mat. COLE A D*LUX special, New Kicks On The Block, and a D*LUX concussion for ol CPA! Brave and Valentine lay their arms across Allen's chest, and ref C.Rob counts the pivotal fall... CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Christopher Patrick Allen Eliminated by: Shayne Brave and Vinny Valentine (pinfall) Advantage: Team Krista, 5-3 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “YEAAAAAA!”scream the fans. SHAYNE AND VINNY MONEYMAKER If there where a smiley indicating violently tearing one's hair out, and jumping up and down on the outside as if a colony of fire ants invaded your wrestling tights, then I might have used it, because that's exactly what Moneymaker does. His overeaction to his team's stunning refusal to squash their disadvantaged foes, further pleases the fans, who taunt him for his misery. Still a semi-loyal member of The Enterprise, despite the fact that her boss wants her to burn in hell, Mackenzie turns towards her bored out of her mind girlfriend, “Alix, baby, you have to do something!” Not too concerned with the plight of her “team”, Alix shurgs her shoulders, “Hey sista, go sista, soul sista, flow sista, Hey sista, go sista, soul sista, go sista. He met Marmalade down in old Moulin Rouge Struttin’ her stuff on the street She said, “Hello, hey Jo, ya wanna give it a go?” Oh! uh huh. Giuchie, Giuchie, ya ya da-da (Hey hey hey) Giuchie, Giuchie, ya ya here (here!) Mocha Chocalaaaata ya ya (Oh yeah!) Creooooooole ladaaaaaay Marma-la-la-la-lade. Voulez vous couchet avec moi ce soir? Voulez vous couchet avec moi?” “Not that, baby! Something else! “Ohhhhhh....In west Philadelphia born and raised, on the playground where I spent most of my days. Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool, and all shooting some b-ball outside of the school. When a couple of guys said "we’re up in no good" Started making trouble in my neighbourhood I got in one little fight and my mom got scared. And said "you’re moving with your aunte and uncle in bel-air." The one member of Team Alix who isn't distracted by song or blind anger, Christian Wright tries to calm things before their odds truly become insurmountable. He charges at Brave, looking to lacerate him with his trusty spear. But the teenager's denim jeans stretch through the air in a leap frog, putting Wright on a collision course with the ring posts. Fortunately for him, he manages to turn the deadly posts to his advantage and leap onto the second floor. As the cute teenybopper turns to face him, Wright is already halfway through the air, cutting him down with a diving shoulder tackle! The audience boos Wright's besting of brave, but they barely register on his mind, as he turns attention to Vinny Valentine. Krista shouts, “Come on Vinny, you can do it! You're the rough take no shit teenager from the inner city of Detroit with a heart of gold as big as all get out!” “Uh,I'm from New York and I'm forty two years old.” “Yeah, whatever, I have a manicure in an hour.” After that wonderful pep talk, the disco duck tries to stun CW with a standing sunsent flip, but the muscular financial guru refuses to be brought to the mat. Rather then wage a pointless war with The Natural, Vincent lets him go free, and journeys towards the ropes. The cables spit him back towards Wright, who greets his return by capturing him into his arms. The disco duck is spun like a disco ball before finally having his back shattered across Wright's outstretched leg by a tilt-a-whirl slam! The Natural roughly shoves his whimpering rival off his khaki pants leg and attempts a pin... ONE TWO Valentine kicks out, but still continues whimpering in pain as his hands move to massage his injured back. But, CW pries his arm away from his wounds, using it as a rope to drag him upright. He then throws the disco duck into the ropes. When the cables throw him back, Wright catches him with a lightening fast arm drag! The moment Vinny hits the mat, his screams are steady and loud. But their muffled by the two hundred twenty five pounds that lie across him for a pinfall... ONE TWO Valentine raises his shoulder from the mat, but not without incurring severe pain through his limbs. On the outside Tony senses that his cousin needs more help then his limited skillset can offer, and thusly leaps onto the ring apron to pull Wright's attention away from the lord of the disco dance. “PISS IN MY EAR! PISS IN MY EAR!” Tony screams to Christian. Wright stares at Tony, and wonders why god would allow such a miserable creation to exist. But, beyond that he pays Tourettes no mind, and returns to the duty of pumelling Vinny. Unfortunately its Vinny who pummels him, by smashing a trilogy of elbows of into his noggin! VINNY That little throwback to 70's winds up coming bundled with an extreme price for Vinny; Christian smashes his knee into his midsection, doubling him over in burning agony. From there CW snares him into an underhook and promptly rips him into the air. Nary a second later, Valentine is powered into the canvas at the hands of the Nightmare On Wallstreet! “CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS!” Mackenzie may share somewhat similar sentiments, and yells, “Tag Alix!” “Never! She shalt receive no more then fleer and scorn, for as long she holds unrepentant for her crimes against my person!” Alix asks, “Uh, like, in something reasonably resembling English?” “Alix, honey, can you apologize to Christian!” As Christian stands in front of her, Alix caves in “Ugh! Fine. Christian, dude, like I'm uh, kinda sorry and stuff. And you better accept it, jerkface, because I've only apologized to one person in my life, and that was Jodie Foster, and only to avoid two years in prison!” “Your apology is as empty as your head, strumpet!” “Whatev, dude. I know how to speak your language.” Step possessed by a charming swagger, and a sly whistle singing from her lips, Alix struts into Wright's full view. As she faces away from him, shapely legs guide him through lusty heaven to the pearly gates of her scrumptious tan bootie, exposed in all its splendor by a self inflicted wedgie. As if Christian's urge for a bottle of baby oil weren't pressing enough, Alix's hands press into her sweet cheeks, and bless viewers with a spellbinding jiggle of the sumptuous golden brown flesh. WRIGHT Poor Christian! When will you learn the severities of your folly? Lulled into an erotic stupor by Alix's mesmerizing BUTT, Christian obviously fails to notice the quiet approach of Doctor Anderson. Its only when he's spun around by the doc does he realize that something is amiss. By that time its much too late to stage a proper defense, as he's already being heaved into sky courtesy of the Anderson Spinebuster! His frame slams into the mat with terrific impact, instantly draining all life from his body, and bringing out a large cheer from the audience. COLE Oh good heavens what a move! I didn't know Doctor Anderson could hit a spinebuster like that! While Alix tries her hardest not to laugh at Wright's misfortune, Anderson tries to further this amazing upset with a pinfall... CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Christian Wright!!!! Eliminated by: Max Anderson (pinfall) Advantage: Team Krista, 5-2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “YEAAAAAAA!” scream the fans, leaping to their feet MONEYMAKER ALIX “Christian are you alright?” Moneymaker asks. Alix answers back, “Yeah, and the ballcock is okie-dokie too!” “What does a part of a toilet have to do with anything?” “I dunno, typically when Christian is lying on his back, mouth wide open, and covered in sweat there are lots of ballcocks around.” On the outside Tony is quite thrilled with the proceedings and tries to high five a stunned Krista, “Hey, unless you come served in a frosted glass or look like Jessica Alba, please don't come within four feet of my lips. thank you.” She tells him. COLE I think Krista may be as shocked as we are about the whole thing! There's no way she could've expected her team to perform this admirably! What an OAOAST moment! Alix pipes up, “Hey, uh Theo dude, can I call ya Theo? Of course I can, dude, I'm the only thing standing between you and snow white and the four angry jobbers. Maybe, instead of like using the dude who could get wood off my autopsy report, you oughta let the girl who hasn't been pinned in about two years, put her thing down flip it and reverse it. Huh?” Resigned to the fact that his only hope of victory resides with a woman who he harbors nothing but hatred for, Moneymaker dejectedly motions her into the ring. The crowd is far removed from his feelings of sorrow, however. Forgetting for the moment how excited they were to see Anderson best Wright, they greet Alix's first appearance into the bout with a mammoth shout of celebration, “LET'S GO ALIX! LET'S GO ALIX! LET'S GO ALIX!” Seeking to hinder the brunette hottie before she derails his team's momentum, Anderson darts towards her. He extends his lengthy leg forward, trying to blast her with a running side kick. But his efforts encounter unbridled failure, as Ally deftly avoids his volley by grabbing onto his foot and slamming it back to the canvas. However, Anderson doesn't even get the chance to bemoan Alix's evasion, because in the blink of an eye she locks her arm around his, and spins him around like a merry-go-round operated by Satan. After a full 360 rotation, she plummets forward, spiking him against the canvas with Herpes, the gift that keeps on giving (flatliner). But it isn't all doom and gloom for Anderson, as Alix lays a bottle of medicine on his orange tights “Living with genital herpes doesn't have to be a hassle, because now there's Valtrex! My genital herpes has been under control for six months!” Mackenzie exclaims, “You have herpes??” “Huh? What? No! I'm joking! From the ad? Valtrex? You know, living with herpes..oh, nevermind!” Every fan in the arena lets loose with a wild ovation for Alix's domination of the doctor. But Anderson, who's now suffering the worst backache of his life, fails to see what's so joyful about his miserable situation. COACH Moneymaker don't deserve to have to depend on Alix to win him this match! Where's Biff? Where's Christian? Where's CPA? Where's people he can trust? With her foe trapped in a vulnerable position, Alix determines now is the time to reshowcase her alluring assets to the lustful crowd. Standing at Doctor Anderson's side with legs apart and hands on bent knees, Alix furiously bucks her voluptuous BUTT, becoming to ass shaking what Michaelangelo was and is to art. The gold standard. A poet would call Alix the light of all lights, to me she's the ass of all asses. Splurty sounds of young boys trying to cover their great shame as mom interrogates them about the hard sock she found under the bed. As boys across the globe pack up the Charmin and call it a night, Alix ends her pants destroying booty routine and rockets herself backwards, coming down across Jock's chest with a standing moonsault. As the audience bellows a gigantic pop, the referee drops down to count the resulting pinfall. CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! Stephen Pigley makes an ill advised attempt to break up the pinfall with a top rope elbow drop. Ill advised because Alix spots his descent out the corner of her eyes and yanks her body away from his fast moving trajectory. Thus the doctor lands with a rough clunk onto his partner's muscular chest, instantly seizing all the air and energy from both men's lungs. Though the rest of her team is dismayed at Pigley's failure, Krista appears to be grateful Alix wasn't the victim of a deadly elbow drop. Pilgey lifts his battered bones off Doctor Anderson, frightfully wondering if he may have fractured his elbow during the crash landing. But he's offered no time to attend towards his wounds, as the SoCal hottie pulls him upright by his bright orange tights and hurls him to the corner. But Pigley is able to shift his weight, and use his sizable strength advantage to reverse the hold and send the princess of Los Angeles to the ringposts. He watches her smash into the padding back first, then follows her in with plans of bringing misery to her world. However those plans fail to materialize thanks to the chocolate hair fighter sidesteping his rampage! He endures has a terrible meeting with the turnbuckles, his injured chest receiving the scathing brunt of the blow. “LET'S GO ALIX! LET'S GO ALIX! LET'S GO ALIX!” Simply looking for a place to fall over and pass out, Pigley slowly staggers from the corner. Much to his surprise, he's kept upright by an unusually tight full nelson by Alix. But within seconds, he's being dropped to the canvas with tremendous force and his face is smeared about the ring floor with the Crack? Shit Son... I was doing that back when it was just called FREEBASE (Flashback)! COLE Oh! Where did that come from? CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Stephen Pigley Eliminated by: Alix Maria Spezia Advantage: Team Krista, 4-2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “YEAAAAAA!” After booting Pigley from the match, Alix decides to offer him some fashion advice,“GTFO Pigley. And what kinda tights are those, dude, that color doesn't even look good on an orange.” “Way to go, baby!” Mackenzie applauds from the outside. Over on the ring apron, Krista looks content with Alix easy destruction of Pigley, but at the same time feels a tiny bit of sympathy of the beaten doc. A tiny bit. A very, very tiny bit. No radical character development changes here ppl! COLE Finally, a member of Team Krista sees elimination. I guess we wont be seeing a clean sweep by Team Krista. What a story that would've been, eh? Pushed to the brink of a manic outrage over his partner's elimination from the bout, Max Anderson assiaslas the spicy Latina with a torrent of blows that land fast and furious upon her bare bare stomach. With her golden brown skinned turned a slight shade of red, Anderson He scoops her into the air, as though he were to execute a bodyslam. But instead of employing that pedestrian maneuver, he readies himself to spike her head against the canvas with Pigley's Time of Death (Michinoku Driver)! That is until he notices Krista mouthing the words “Do it and die”. As such he can perform no more then a body slam. COACH These are the worst Team Captain's in the world! Not surprisingly, the body slam does little in the way of damage and within nanoseconds, the bouncy brunette back onto her feet. Anderson attempts to quell her fire with a stiff forearm, but one swipe of her star studded gogo boots weakens his knees and shuts down all his offensive weapons. Mortally exhausted, Anderson is then launched into a neutral corner, where the steel posts savagely slice into the tanned flesh on his back. The pain grows even more intolerable when his enemy shoots forward to skewer him with a flying forearm! The numerous multicolored oversized bracelets on her arm etch their mark onto his once handsome face, carving up bloody cuts along their impact zone. Gravely wounded and on the verge of passing out, the doctor sags down to the mat, leaning against the turnbuckle posts for whatever assistance they provide. Ally backs away from her beaten foe, and proceeds to run through call and response with the audience, "I'M SO HOOD...." "I WEAR MY PANTS BELOW MY WAIST. AND I NEVER DANCE WHEN I'M IN THIS PLACE. CUZ YOU AND MAN IS PLANNIN TO HATE! I'M SO HOOD..." Alix sings, "AND I GOT THESE GOLDS UP IN MY MOUTH IF I GET CLOSER TO MY HOUSE THEN YOU'LL KNOW WHAT TALKING BOUT! Mackenzie!" "I'm so hood, my daddy once bought me a Saab instead of the Benz!" With her Tonie-socialite girlfriend having killed her ode to ghetto's everywhere, Alix resigns herself towards defeating Pigley. Alix rips him away from the ring posts, and curls her arm around his neck for the side headlock needed to begin her somersault neckbreaker finisher. Unfortunately her grip isn't nearly as tight as she believed, and the far stronger Anderson meets with few difficulties in powering out of it. Before she's offered a chance to retry her headlock efforts, her agile foe is rushing towards the ropes. His boots elevate him to the third cable, and he comes hurtling backwards with a lionsault. But Ally sees the move coming a mile away and rolls forward to avoid it. Fortunately for Team Krista, Doctor Anderson saw her avoidance well in advance and succeeds in landing on his leather boots. COLE Disaster avoided for Doctor Anderson, but for how long? Gathering her strength, the perky cutie stands up to end the Love Doctor nuisance once and for all. However, Anderson proves he won't go down so easily, by sending a closed fist to her face. But she stymies the Chi-town brawler's attempt by slamming her gogo boots into his washboard abs. With the fans cheering her on, Alix clamps her claws onto him with a second side headlock. His luck having suddenly evaporated, Anderson's lone option is to roar horrified screams as the sex kitten sends him tumbling through the air with the somersault neckbreaker. Absent of any chance to protect himself, Anderson's neck is brought down painfully against the canvas, landing so gruesomely that Vinny Valentine has to wince in disgust. “ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” COLE Doctor Anderson, you just got your Shot At Love! While Mackenzie claps wildly for her sweetie's unstoppable obliteration of the Love Doctors, Alix attempts another crucial pinfall... CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Max Anderson Eliminated by: Alix Maria Spezia Advantage: Team Krista, 3-2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “YEAAAAAH!” “Great job, Alix!” Mackenzie screams. But the opposite ring apron is rife with the downtrodden faces of a despairing Team Krista. Well, all except Krista herself who can't tell if she's supposed to be glad for Alix or feel sorry for Anderson's failure. COACH Three-two, Krista! The plot is a thickenin, Cole! Its a thickenin! MONEYMAKER BWHHAHAHAAHA! Excellent! COLE Weren't you just crying your eyes out ten minutes ago? MONEYMAKER Shut up, Cole! COLE How did he...anyway, folks, this is a stunning change of course for this match. Once up five people to two, Team Krista has been brought down to only being ahead by one by Alix Maria Spezia, who just ripped right through The Love Doctors. And folks, right now we have to take a commercial break, stay tuned for the conclusion of this bout! COMMERCIAL When HELDOWN returns to airwaves, the slender figure of Alix Maria Spezia is being replaced by the portly body of Theodore Moneymaker. Moneymaker's return to the bout instantly shifts the audience's joyful mood away from Team Alix, replacing it with a burning urge to see the billionaire by pounded into an early retirement. But Moneymaker delays their wishes by smashing a well timed elbow into Valetine's forehead. Instantly a small river of blood trickles from his brutalized skin. But he hasn't a chance to attend to his cut before the tycoon drags him onto his broad shoulders for a fireman's carry position. Instantly, the disco machine tries to fight his way free of Moneymaker's clutches. And he does encounter freedom, just not in the way he would've liked! Moneymaker throws him off his shoulders, and drives his neck into the top rope. Searing anguish spreads like a cancer through the throat of Valentine as he crumples into a heap on the canvas. On the outside Tony watches with rising panic, as his cousin struggles to simply breathe. “MONEYMAKER SUCKS! MONEYMAKER SUCKS!” the fans scream. Back on his feet, Valentine leans into his rival with a straight left cross that Moneymaker takes in stride, firing off a right hook of his own in response. Unfazed by the punch, the disco duck returns fire with a knife edge chop. The strike pushes the tycoon back several inches and leaves him stunned for a precious few seconds. But these few seconds are all Vinny requires to lock his foe into a facelock. He drops backwards and mashes the man's rugged face into the mat with a snap DDT. While Moneymaker desperately tries to remember just what city he's in, the audience loudly cheers for his obvious pain. “Yeah, Vinny! I love ya like I love the older sister I was forced to commit against her will!” Krista shouts. Though the crowd may be delighted with Valentine's whupping of The Enterprise CEO, the disco duck's thirst for violence has yet to be quenched. Thus it's with great glee, that he seeks to draw a bit of blood from the slowly rising tycoon. Yet, Moneymaker's dazed state is but a clever ruse and he exposes his trickery by capturing the approaching dancing king into a roll up! Robinson scores the fall.... ONE TWO Fortunately Valentine escapes the pin well before the three count. He rips his body off the mat, eager to continue his thrashing of his rival. But Moneymaker delays these plans with a series of left jabs that sway Vinny's head like a tether ball. Thinking that the disco duck is a mere high impact move away from elimination Moneymaker attempts to send him to the ropes in hopes of destroying him with a powerslam upon his return. But, Valentine isn't nearly as wounded as his opponent believed and exposes Moneymaker to this fact, by reversing the hold into a short arm knee strike. Unable to absorb the attack with his flabby stomach, Moneymaker sags to the canvas, forced into painful labored breaths. This permits Valentine a moment to bounce off the ropes and angle his Boogie Shoes (Shining Wizard) directly towards his enemy's vulnerable face! But at the last possible second, Moneymaker tucks his head into his chest, avoiding a certain knockout! COLE Close call! Flashing a look of rage, Vinny tries to swing his attacking boot backwards to impale the back of Moneymaker's head. However, Moneymaker catches onto the shoe, and uses it to twirl Vinny around. Riddled groggy by the unexpected spin, a nauseated Valentine stumbles backwards into the waiting clutches of the Bank Vault (cora clutch sleeper)! The reaction of the sold out Portland audience is immediate, a strong, sharp booing as Vinny's face passes through different shades of blue on the way to unconsciousness. “MONEYMAKER SUCKS! MONEYMAKER SUCKS!” With no hope, and no help on any horizon, Vinny's options become bleaker and bleaker by the moment. Thus he's left with no other choice but to submit to the powerful finisher of the detested heel. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Vinny Valentine Eliminated by: Theodore Moneymaker Advantage: TIED 2-2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “FUCK”Tony hollers. Needless to say, the crowd is equally less then thrilled with that result, and a whole new round of “MONEYMAKER SUCKS” chants are given life. On the ring apron, a cold anger burns on Krista's face, and fire spews from her eyes, as she's unable to comprehend how a five on two advantage disappeared without a trace. Brave tries to cheer up, but there's no joy to be had with the sight of guffawing Moneymaker lying before her. COACH Ha, ha and ha! All that talk about “wow what a story, what an achievement, what a victory for Team Krista” is bunk! Bunk! And now the sides ain't really even. Alix and Krista are comparable, but Moneymaker and Brave? Naw, skinny white dude don't match up! Coach's assessment of his talent aside, Brave decides to enter the ring for the sole purpose of pleasing Krista with Moneymaker's elimination. He overwhelms the money mogul with pair of blazing fast chops, that permit him to whip Moneymaker into the ropes. However, Moneymaker reverses the hold and Showtime is sent trotting to the cables. The wealthy Floridian lowers his oversized head, trying to trick Brave into using a leapfrog that he'll counter into an atomic drop. But, the Tigerbeat coverboy is wise to these tricks and slams his Nike tennis shoe into his rival's hairy chest. Hollering in half annoyance half pain, Moneymaker rockets upright, clutching suddenly sore pectoral muscles. “YEAH-UH!” Shayne screams, gaining a “WE LOVE YOU! WE LOVE YOU!” chant from every female under the age of twenty. Still intent on impressing his crush, Shayne darts back to the cables to channel momentum for a high impact assault. Problematically, his return is hindered by Mackenzie DeCenzo latching onto his left foot. “BOOOOO!” Noticing that Moneymaker is slowly creeping behind the boyband icon, Mackenzie does her part to keep Brave distracted, showcasing the perfect seduction of pouting cherry red lips and batted eyelashes. Its not enough to make him forget the twenty odd love songs he's wrote to Krista, but it is enough to distract him until Moneymaker's arms ambush him with the dreaded Bank Vault! But the crowd hasn't a moment to boo before Brave shreds Moneymaker's devices with a stunner that delights the Portlanders! Not quite as thrilled is Mister Moneymaker, who, clutching his jaw, staggers himself backwards right into the Elizabeth, I'm coming to join ya, honey! It's the big one! (Reverse x-factor) from Krista Isadora Duncan! “YEAAAAA!” Not exactly needing an excuse to get close to Krista, Shayne gives her huge hug, which causes her remind herself to burn this particular outfit when she gets back to LA. Brave gets a little too comfortable with certain more ample features, and thus she has to push him way from the annoying hug. Before Brave can write a sappy power ballad about unrequited love, he's left to pin Moneymaker... CROWD ONE CROWD TWO To the fans disgust, Moneymaker actually manages a shoulder off the ring apron. Brave is as agitated as the spectators, and refuses to believe Moneymaker succeeded in kicking out. Regardless he stills his growing annoyance, and brings Moneymaker to his feet. The detested heel makes a weak attempt to fight off his antagonist, peppering him with several light jabs. But Showtime subdues this rebellion by nailing him with a basement dropkick! As the fans applaud his besting of their least favorite wrestler, Brave once again builds up speed on the ropes. As he approaches his enemy, he leaps onto his knee, and drives the tip of his boot into the back of his head with a shinning enziguri! The crowd is ecstatic over the usage of his signature move and offer him roaring cheers. COLE Were you saying something about Showtime Shayne being no match for Moneymaker, Coach? Care to eat some crow. Powered by adrenaline Shayne heads to his corner, and journeys towards the top rope. He actually succeeds in prying pleasured gaze away from the eye popping view of Krista's shirt popping boobs, long enough to leap off with a picture perfect elbow drop! As his one hundred eighty pounds sail through the sky like a majestic eagle, camera flashes click across the jam packed venue. Unfortunately the slower moving amateur photographers among them aren't able to capture his gentle flight. Rather they immortalize his horrific landing once Moneymaker moves out the way! COLE Oh no! The audience and Krista share similar thoughts to Cole. But unlike Krista, the announcer and the crowd, don't have to now deal with a pudgy billionaire barelling down on them with a shoulder block. She's well prepared for his attack, however, and once he nears, she smashes him with a shoulder block of her own! Doubled over, he's force clutch onto the ring ropes for support, but they can do nothing to stop Shayne from pulling him down with a surprise roll up! CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! COLE And so close, but Moneymaker kicking out at the last...hold on. That was three! That was three! That was three! Moneymaker is done! Moneymaker is eliminated! Wow! So shocking is this event, that it even takes the Portlanders a moment to come to grips with the joyful occurrence they've just bore witness to. But once they truly comprehend what has transpired, their cheers are nearly deafening! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Theodore Moneymaker (pinfall) Eliminated by: Shayne Brave Advantage: Team Krista 2-1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Overcome with excitement for his upset of Theodore Moneymaker, Shayne pumps his fist and runs towards Krista for another hug... “Uh, a handshake is cool, thank you.” Krista warns. Stunned with chilling confusion over what poor fate he's been handed, Moneymaker lies on the canvas thinking back to all the other horrible incidents in this match. That's when he realizes he's stuck in a nightmare with no foreseeable ending. MONEYMAKER Snarling in feral rage, Moneymaker springs forward to crush an unaware Brave with the $Billion Dollar Knee Lift$! Bryant is left on the canvas, and finds himself wide open to repeated lashings from his sadistic foe. Beyond outraged by Moneymaker's assault, Krista tries to enter the ring, but is halted by Robinson, who wants to minimize the chance for further violence. On the other side of the ring, Alix yells at Moneymaker to cease his horrible behavior. But it doesn't seem that anything can stop his lunatic rampage until a gaggle of referees fill the outside area demanding he stop the attack. COLE This is out of control! What the hell is wrong with this guy? Get out the ring! Somewhat calmed by the cathartic beating, Moneymaker leaves the battleground without much protest, but with a gargantuan amount of jeers and boos from the audience. With admirable strength, Shayne forces his way to his feet. But all the courage in the world doesn't change the harrowing fact that he now has to deal with a fresh and formidable Alix Maria Spezia. Accompanied by a monstrous roar from the fans, Alix uneasily enters the ring, unsure if she even wants to lay a finger on Shayne. COLE Well, Alix was instrumental in helping D*LUX and Leon battle The Enterprise through the spring and summer, and naturally they developed a bond. But, now they find themselves as enemies. Still not convinced fighting Shayne is the proper course of action, Alix looks to Mackenzie, hopeful for agreement. But, Mackie, in soft and sweet tones, assures her that winning this match is the best possible thing she can do. While Alix may not be entirely sure this is correct, she gives into the soothing melody of Mackenzie's voice and throws herself into war with Shayne. Alix latches onto his arm, and heaves him into corner posts. The back that Moneymaker spent a full minute obliterating scrapes off the ring posts, bringing out tortured screams from Showtime. Alix isn't exactly merciful to her former friend, quickly leaping onto the second ropes to tower above Shayne. Without so much as passing him a single solitary glance, she monkeyflips him away from the corner, leading him to land horribly on his injured back. As white hot pain shoots through his body, he bellows his misery. “Alix!” Krista begins, “Stop this! Shayne is your friend also! He's more your friend then mine, I hate men.” Actively attempting to ignore Krista's appeals to her gentler side, Alix scrapes the motionless corpse off the canvas. With ice water seemingly traversing through her veins, she launches him back into the corner. The steel turnbuckles devour his flesh, reducing the bones in his back to mere brittle, and turning him into a wailing and moaning pillar of misery. If Alix feels any sympathy for the pain she's causing, its not readily apparent when her bracelet coated arm carves up his face with a running forearm. From the corner he staggers, moving with the speed of a mummy, and the glazed over look of a zombie. There's little intention for offensive in his movements, and Alix makes sure their never will be, grounding him to a halt with a leg sweep! “Come on, baby!” Mackenzie screams, beating on the canvas. Alix situates one gogo boot just above each of her opponent's knees and bends his legs up, twisting them around her's. With Shayne assured of not being able to move a muscle, Alix grips both of his wrists, while placing her free foot onto his badly mangled back. To complete her submission, The Hollywood Bad Girl pulls back on Shayne's arm, elevating his upper body and opening the floodgates to allow a typhoon of pain to pulverize his back. COLE Everybody go surfin, Surf Venice Beach! “Alix, stop!” Krista pleads with her. “Great job, honey! Great job!” Mackenzie shouts over Alix. Unable to stomach the anguish for much longer, a nearly weeping Brave groans his submission. The fans give a mammoth cheer for Alix's latest victory, but feel a little guilty about it, because damn that poor whiteboy got fucked over. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Shayne Brave Eliminated by: Alix Maria Spezia Advantage: TIED 1-1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE We are down to the two team captains! Coach, do you know what this means?! Portland certainly does, as the murmur of anticipation for the matchup they've been waiting all contest for reaches unheard of decibel levels. Off their seats they come, every single eyeball in the arena locked unwavering onto the colossal matchup in the center of the ring. Like eighteen thousand seperate earthquakes, surges of cheers roar across the venue. COACH All night, all night long, this what we've wanted to see. And here it is! Pick a side Cole. Team Krista or Team Alix. Members of the crowd have already chosen sides, “LET'S GO ALIX!” “LET'S GO KRISTA!” “LET'S GO ALIX!” “LET'S GO KRISTA!” “LET'S GO ALIX!” “LET'S GO KRISTA!” their chants boom with unheard of authority, tearing through the night as if they had a personal stake in the battle. Each chant hits like a gunshot into the brains of the ex-lovers, who want nothing more then to avoid such a grizzly situation. Stunned with horror, stunned with revulsion, Krista and Alix look at each other for the first time as enemies and what they see chokes them, like an invisible fist clutching their throats. Remaining strangely silent through all this is Mackenzie, her blues watching with great interest at the developments soon to unfold. COLE I don't think they can really fight each other. Their faces are swept entirely clean of every emotion except a cold, stinging dread. There's no will to move, to speak, to act, or even turn away from each other, all they can do is pray for someone to shake them awake from this all-consuming nightmare. And that's when Mackenzie acts. The beautiful business maven reaches into the ring, and latches onto Krista's high heels. Suddenly roars of anticipation from the audience, morph into shrill yells of disgust for Mackie. COLE What's she doing? Giving Krista another reason to have her killed. Krista's eyes go frigid, a feral blue, and they gleam like a predator lurking beyond the fringes of firelight. Without a thought towards anything besides this entire terrible situation being Mackenzie's fault, Krista dives out of the ring. Left face to face with a woman who's hatred burns as hot as a furnace, Mackenzie performs the only logical task she knows. She runs. And runs fast. “LET'S GO KRISTA!” Still paralyzed by the possibility of having to physically harm the former center of her universe, Alix can't quite bring herself to react to the chase scene. Robinson is far more active, and realizing that Krista is the legal woman, he begins a ten count. TEN! COLE He's counting Krista out? NINE! Black heels click off the black mats, as the woman with the black heart refuses to yield her chase of her shrieking victim. EIGHT! COLE Did Mackenzie plan this? SEVEN! Memories of time with Alix echo in her mind, granting Krista increased speed on her quest to dismantle Mackenzie limb from limb. SIX! FIVE! “LET'S GO KRISTA!” Krista manages to grab a hold of Mackenzie's dress, and though it rips away what little fabric covers generously exposed back, she isn't able to hold Mackenzie for long. FOUR! COACH She knew Alix wouldn't be willing to fight Krista, so she's going to get Krista counted out! What a sneaky bitch! THREE! Alix can only depressingly run her hands through her brown locks, stupefied at the insanity she's wrought. TWO! Mackenzie and the tattered remains of her ultra expensive dress dive into the ring. Struggling to keep the outfit from falling off, she scrambles behind her lady love for protection and to act as a makeshift dressing room. More concerned with her intended massacre of Mackie then winning the bout, Krista tries to slide into the squared circle. But she's merely a shade too late as the clock finally hits.... ONE! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Krista Isadora Duncan (countout) Sole Survivor: Alix Maria Spezia ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Spurred on by a blazing outrage, the fans are quick and merciless in expressing their disdain for Mackenzie tactics, blasting her with boos and numerous profanities even I'm too moralistic to reprint! COLE I don't believe it! Mackenzie leading Krista around the ring right into a countout. And these fans in the arena, who had been waiting so long to see Alix and Krista hook up have been robbed. And we're left to wonder what would've happened had Mackenzie not interfered. What would they have done if left face to face with another in the middle of an OAOAST wrestling ring, in front of billions world wide? Mackenzie makes no note of the audience's impolite (to say the least) treatment of her strategies. And instead gently strokes her stunned girlfriend's hair, until the gorgeous brunette manages to meet her warm smile with soft, sorrowful nod. COACH Hahaha! Genius by Mackenzie! Genius. Krista thinks she's so smart but she's been outsmarted by the real smartest woman on television. I gotta tip my hat to Miss DeCenzo. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner and the sole survivor ALIX MARIA SPEZIA! There's a mammoth pop from the Team Alix fans, that's matched by a mammoth boo from the Team Krista fanbase. The heroine for the Team Krista set, sits on bended knee, arm draped over the guard rail, seething with an undying sadness at the sight of Mackenzie holding her Alix in her arms. Though she'd love to rip Alix away from Mackenzie, she only stares ahead with lowered eyes. COLE Well, folks we're we can only wonder where this story will take us next? Certainly Krista go quietly into the night, and with people like Moneymaker and Wright roaming around to stir the pot, I imagine fireworks are ahead. We'll see them and so much more next week on OAOAST HeldDOWN from Tacoma, WA! On that note we... FADE OUT WRITTEN BY Patty O’Green Zack Malibu King Cucaracha Ed Wood Caulfield LunarPhoenix Tony149 OAOAST CREATED BY Anglesault Tony149 CWM DIRECTED BY Tony149 © 2007 OAOAST Entertainment

TV 14 LV PRESENTED IN HD A montage of still photos from this past Sunday's November Reign event airs, followed by the rapid-fire opening credits set to "Party Like a Rockstar". "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! B O O M ~! LIVE! Portland, Oregon COLE 5 nights removed from November Reign, we come to you live from the Rose Garden in Portland, Oregon for a special Friday night edition of HeldDOWN~! Michael Cole and Jonathan Coachman at Sofa Central and Coach, what a HUGE main event we have in store here tonight. COACH That's right, baby boy. It's the match that didn't take place at November Reign because Krista and her hodgepodge band of misfists got a good look at what they were up against and wanted no part of it. Team Alix -- Alix Maria Spezia, Theodore Moneymaker, Christian Wright, CPA and Biff Atlas -- vs. Team Krista -- Vinny Valentine, The Love Doctors, Shayne Brave of D*LUX fame and Krista Isadora Duncan. COLE Also tonight, Los Conquistadors seek their first victory in quite sometime as they face the exiting young tag team Rescue 911. COACH I know you go to bed at night dreaming of a little mouth-to-mouth from EMT Tim, but it's no secret you're a big fan of the Lone Star Gunslingers, too. They'll be in action as well. COLE We'll also hear from Zack Malibu. But right now it's up to... The lights go down in the arena. A Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican saying them: *THE CHAMP IS HERE!* "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and "Know Your Role '99" begins playing, with the crowd standing up and actually cheering for once! PR is heard saying, "THE CHAMP IS HERE!" throughout the song, while smoke fills the entrance stage and strobe lights appear on the entrance set. COLE The Corporate Champ is about to make an appearance here on HeldDOWN~! A few seconds elapsed, the entrance doors slide open, and out through the smoke comes "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican. The crowd cheers loudly. PRL is not in a good mood at all. PRL is in his ring gear. He looks at the entrance. The entrance doors slide open, and out from the smoke comes Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez, wearing earrings, a gold necklace, a green halter top, a blue wind-breaker jacket over it, gold bracelets on her wrists, her engagement ring on her right ring finger, a gold watch on her right wrist, tight blue jeans with a black leather belt, and black heel boots. She has the OAOAST Women's Championship belt over her right shoulder. Following Lindsay is Vitamin X and Princess Stacey, arm in arm. Then Cuban Wall, Mr. Boricua, The Bone Thug, and Thomas Rodriguez. COLE The Lightning Crew is out here, but withOUT Stephen Joseph Popick! COACH Popick's probably running late is all. Stop looking too much into things! PR looks at the crowd with a serious look on his face. He looks at his Lightning Crew, and orders them to walk with him down to the ring which they do so. MICHAEL BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the ring..."THE CORPORATE CHAMPION" THA PUERTO RICAN and THE LIGHTNINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! COLE Tha Puerto Rican was arguably moments away from becoming the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion last Sunday night at November Reign, but his so-called 'friend', his mentor, his manager, Stephen Joseph Popick, was able to make it to the top of the Triple Decker Cage and grab the OAOAST Title belt to retain and have his Title reign survive for another day! COACH 'So-called friend'? What's this 'so-called' crap about? COLE Coach, you were there with me last Sunday night! Tha Puerto Rican SAVED Popick from a Riot Act Plus on the roof of the second cage, but Popick did NOT save Tha Puerto Rican from an Angle Slam from Zack Malibu! COACH So? Popick was in it to win it last Sunday! Just because he didn't save Tha Puerto Rican from ONE MOVE from Zack Malibu doesn't mean a damn thing! Their friendship is as tight as ever! COLE Well, they appeared to be ready to throw fists last Sunday at November Reign until Zack climbed onto the roof of the second cage. COACH Again, that was in the heat of the moment. They both said things that they regret. It's human nature. That's all. COLE But this wasn't the first time that's happened! It's happened more than once in the past month! How many more times must it happen before it stops being in the 'heat of the moment' and starts being real dissension? COACH When Popick *intentionally* beats up Tha Puerto Rican, THEN it'll be real dissension! But until then, there's nothing more to it! Tha Puerto Rican and The Lightning Crew continue their walk to the ring. PR stops to give some fans at ringside the Corporate Eyebrow, and then climbs up the ring steps. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez follows. PRL gets onto the ring apron. He looks at the crowd. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez holds the ropes, and Tha Puerto Rican enters the ring. COLE Again, PRL is without Popick here tonight! COACH And again, Popick's probably running late! PRL should know a thing or two about running late! COLE LOLINSIDEJOKELOL2007~! Tha Puerto Rican spins around, soaking in the fans' cheers for once while "Know Your Role '99" continues playing over the P.A. system. Tha Puerto Rican does the HBK muscle pose while Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez raises the OAOAST Women's Championship belt high up in the air and pyro goes off behind them. The crowd is still cheering loudly. PRL heads to a second turnbuckle and raises his hands in the air. He then gets off the second turnbuckle and heads to another second turnbuckle where he raises his hands again. PR then gets off that turnbuckle and heads to a third second turnbuckle where he raises his right fist in the air while a spotlight shines on him and he "smells the electricity" ala The Rock. PRL does the same Rock pose on the fourth second turnbuckle, receiving cheers. PR stands on the turnbuckle for a few more seconds, looking at the crowd. COLE This crowd warming up to Tha Puerto Rican, a trend which started four weeks ago when we were in San Juan, Puerto Rico and continued last Sunday at November Reign when every single fan in attendance was itching for Tha Puerto Rican to ignore Popick and grab the OAOAST Championship belt from the roof of the arena! COACH I know PRL loves his Lightning Bolts, but he did the right thing last Sunday, letting Popick grab the Title. COLE Uh...I don't think he meant for that to happen. Popick told PRL of Zack's arrival so that he could sneak away to the top of the third cage! COACH But PRL could have ignored Zack and gone for the Title! But he didn't. Therefore, he did the right thing last Sunday! Doy! Tha Puerto Rican gets off the turnbuckle and stands with The Lightning Crew. Together, they all, in sync, form an 'L' with their arms. The Lightning Crew Salute! PR then calls for a microphone while the lights go back on in the arena. COLE PRL was hoping to bring the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title to The Lightning Crew for the first time ever last Sunday night, but alas, it was not to be. Stephen Joseph Popick, through hell or high water, is STILL the OAOAST Champion! COACH The P-Man did it again! He shocked the world for the second time in about a month! Popick is on a roll! COLE And he might have PRL's distraction to thank for it! COACH Hey, Zack was underneath Popick too! COLE True. But still... COACH But nothing! Stop trying to stir the pot! There is nothing wrong with PR and Popick! Their friendship survived Popick's first World Title reign, it will survive his second! COLE But for how much longer? COACH For as long as his Title reign lasts, which is hopefully forever! COLE That can't happen, Coach. Popick's got to die someday. COACH Says who? COLE God? Nature? Time? COACH ...Oh. COLE You get stupider by the day. Tha Puerto Rican now has a microphone in his right hand. The Lightning Crew all stand and watch. "Know Your Role '99" dies down. But the crowd is still cheering. "p.r.!" "p.r.!" "p.r.!" "p.r.!" PRL "smells the electricity" again. He then puts the microphone to his lips and begins speaking. "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION" THA PUERTO RICAN You can cheer me...you can boo me...I DON'T CARE! What I DO care about is a 225 pound steaming piece of monkey crap named STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" THA PUERTO RICAN Now last Sunday, Tha Puerto Rican did what he said he would do and that is layeth the smacketh down on four pieces of trailer park trash! I climbed all the way to the top of the Triple Decker Cage! I made it to the very end! 40-50 feet in the air! And I was mere moments away from finally achieving my dream. FINALLY becoming World Heavyweight Champion. But then YOU interfered. YOU stopped me from finishing what I started! YOU and YOU ALONE prevented me from walking out of November Reign, Las Vegas, Nevada the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion! The crowd boos loudly. PRL It was all because of you. YOU! My 'Career Consultant'. My manager. The one guy who I always thought would have my back. It was all thanks to YOU that I left November Reign empty handed. Seeing you on top of the Triple Decker Cage celebrating, holding the OAOAST Title belt close to your heart...IT MADE ME WANT TO RETCH! COLE You are not alone, P.R. PRL (CONT'D) That should have been ME up there, damnit! That should have been ME! Now, I'll give credit where credit is due. The other four men in the match kicked as--actually, scratch that...Bohemoth, Zack Malibu, Todd Cortez, and ESPECIALLY Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix are still nothing more but a bunch of JABRONIES! The crowd responds with a mixture of boos and cheers for that remark. PRL Now, it was four years ago today, that Tha Puerto Rican had his first shot at the OAOAST World Title. That was at Deadly Game: Unlucky 7 in the first ever Elimination Chamber Match in One And Only AngleSault Thread history. That was in 2003. It's 2007. It's four years later, and I STILL have not ONE World Title reign to my credit! And Goddamnit, I AM SICK AND TIRED OF THAT FACT! I am sick and tired of waiting for my chance. My time to come! It should have happened last Sunday! IT SHOULD HAVE-- PRL is getting hyper. He tries to calm down. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez massages his shoulders. Cuban Wall and Vitamin X check up on him. COLE PRL getting worked up here. COACH Stay cool, P. Stay cool, Champ. PRL takes a deep breath. He continues. PRL I'm not waiting anymore! It ends tonight! I'm gonna whup somebody's ass tonight! So Stephen Joseph Popick, bring your four-eyed roody poo-- CROWD CANDY ASS! PRL --out here so we can settle this, mano-e-mano! World Champ to Corporate Champ! COLE Wow! PRL's calling out Popick! COACH He can't do that! That's his manager! COLE I'm not so sure about that anymore, Coach! COACH Oh no! PRL paces back and forth in the ring to the crowd's delight. The Lightning Crew are shocked by what they just heard. They don't know what to do now. PRL You heard me, Stephen. I ain't gonna wait here all day! Bring your ass down here, NOW! COLE PR wants the World Title tonight! COACH Think about what you're doing, PR! Think! PRL Stephen, I am going to kick your ass by the time the show's over, so just come down here right now and get it over with! PRL paces back and forth. The crowd is still cheering. The Lightning Crew talk to PRL. PRL Guys, don't worry, I know what I'm doing. Stephen, I'm not telling you, I'm DEMANDING you come out to the ring RIGHT NOW! PRL jumps up and down in place. Popick still hasn't showed up. PRL You haven't answered any of my phone calls, e-mails, or text messages this week. I KNOW you're in this arena! Come on out right now and let's do this thing face-to-face! Tha Puerto Rican says you have five seconds, AND THA PUERTO RICAN MEANS FIVE SECONDS, to come out here right this instance! ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIV-- "BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH!" The entrance doors slide open, and STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK himself steps out onto the entrance stage to nothing but loud boos. Wearing his eyeglasses, a white collar dress shirt, a watch on his right wrist, black dress pants, and black dress shoes, the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion appears on stage, a microphone in his right hand and the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt over his left shoulder. STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK That is all I'm hearing. Nothing but blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. P.R., you really gotta tone it down a little. Make your sentences short and sweet. 20 minutes is WAY too long to be talking in the middle of the ring! PRL Oh very funny! What took you so long? POPICK I was in the back listening to your whining and complaining. Monkey crap? THAT'S the best you can come up with? COME ON! You're supposed to be a master on the mic. A real wordsmith. But instead you use a phrase that was never that great to begin with, and you decide to use it on me, your manager, your 'Career Consultant'. PRL You certainly didn't act like either of those things last Sunday night. POPICK Once again, you seem to forget that the WORLD TITLE WAS ON THE LINE! I did what I had to do in order to retain, and might I add: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! Popick raises the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt high in the air to loud boos. He has a wide evil smile on his face. PRL does the McMahon SNEER~! PRL But what about sacrificing me to Zack Malibu? POPICK Oh that? Well, that...well...that was simply me...trying to get you to stand up for yourself. For the past three years, I've done nothing but help you win match after match. And, to be perfectly honest...I'm rather sick of doing it. SOOO, rather than save you AGAIN, I decided to just let you fight your own battles. And you failed. Not surprisingly. PRL What is with you lately? We've been tight for three years now. You've had my back. I've had yours. I've saved your ass! You've saved mine! Damnit, I WENT TO JAIL FOR EIGHT LONG MONTHS FOR YOU! Popick's expression changes from cocky to serious. POPICK I'll tell you what's with me. I'VE HAD IT! I've had it with you, P.R.! Last Sunday night was the last straw! I've tried to remain cool. I've tried to remain calm. I let it slide when you failed not once, but TWICE to win the World Heavyweight Title! But in the words of Popeye, 'That is all I can stands and I can't stands no more!' You failed AGAIN last Sunday, P.R. You didn't win the World Heavyweight Title in your third try in four months! Sunday night could have been your night, PRL! But no...not only did you let your fiancee down. Not only did you let your Lightning Crew down. But you let me down. You let Stephen Joseph Popick down. And I don't like to be let down. I don't like it when things don't go my way. I've spent alot of time and money on you, P.R. I spent alot of time molding you into the perfect Corporate Champion. And what do I get in return? Nothing but disappointment. Stephen Joseph Popick walks down the entrance ramp, stopping in the middle to continue speaking. POPICK Well, I'm tired of being disappointed! I'm tired of not seeing a return in my investment! So last Sunday night, I came to the conclusion that I should have come to months ago...possibly even years ago: you're just not worthy enough to be a World Heavyweight Champion. Face it, P.R.: you are NOT World Championship material. No P.R., what you really are is a loser. It is YOU and YOU ALONE that is the big piece of monkey crap! The crowd boos. PRL is PISSED OFF now! The Lightning Crew all watch Popick with menacing looks on their faces. PRL Monkey crap? MONKEY CRAP!? Tha Puerto Rican says that this P.R. Menace is going to take his size 10 boot and stick it straight up your candy ass! POPICK Oh BITE ME, EDWARD! You're all talk and no walk! You're filled with nothing but BULLS(bleep)! Why it took me so long to realize this I do not know, but the important thing is that I DO realize this now and I am going to make things different from now on! Starting with the END of our partnership! PRL Fine! It's over! I don't care anymore! It just makes it easier for me to challenge you to a match for the World Heavyweight Title tonight right here in Portland, Oregon! CHEAP POP~! COACH Oh, P.R. COLE He wants another match tonight! POPICK P.R...what did I just tell you a few moments ago? You are NOT, I repeat, NOT World Championship material. So, it would be pretty darn stupid of me to have a Title Match with you, since I would beat you in 10 seconds flat! And I don't think the people of this fine *snicker* fair city would like to have a 10 second main event match tonight! We are not WWE, we are not TNA, we are not ECW, we are DEFINITELY not WCW, we are the OAOAST, and in the OAOAST, quality main events are ALWAYS guaran-damn-teed! Unlike PRL getting the job done for once in his sad, pathetic life! "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE Popick just stirring the pot here. PRL's face is red. He is fuming. He puts the microphone to his lips again. THA PUERTO RICAN Then fine! No Title Match tonight! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" PRL Instead, let's do a tag team match! In fact...let's make it a Six-Man Tag Team Match! Me, Cuban Wall, and Mr. Boricua vs. you...and whoever unlucky sumbitches you pick! Let's do that tonight! Let's make that the main event here on HeldDOWN~! COLE Whoa! What a match that should be! Six-Man Tag Team action tonight on HeldDOWN~! COACH He hasn't accepted the match yet, stupid! The crowd cheers. Stephen Joseph Popick chuckles. He adjusts the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt over his left shoulder. The Lightning Crew all get into fighting stances. PRL Come on! It shouldn't be too hard for you to find two partners, what with you being The Most Hated Man In The OAOAST and all! POPICK Heh...that's cute. Real cute. Me being The Most Hated Man In The OAOAST and all. Nice one. Nice. Umm...tell you what. I'm gonna have to take a rain check on that one too, I'm afraid! Sorry, Edward! The crowd boos. PRL is confused. PRL Wait, why not? You'd have TWO partners! You could hide behind two guys instead of one! I'd thought you would love that! It's the perfect match for a chickenhead like you! Come on! Let me lay the smackdown on you and your two partners you jabroni! Popick walks further down the entrance ramp. He stops near the end of the entrance ramp. POPICK Again, I'm afraid that match won't happen tonight, P.R. Because... PRL Because why? POPICK Because if we were to have that match...who would be your partners? Stephen Joseph Popick does the Corporate Eyebrow. PRL has a confused look on his face. PRL Wha-- *BAM!* CUBAN WALL CLOTHESLINES THE BACK OF THA PUERTO RICAN'S NECK!!!!! COLE WHAT!? COACH WHAT!? CROWD WHAT!? Cuban Wall starts stomping on Tha Puerto Rican! Mr. Boricua joins him! So does The Bone Thug! Then Vitamin X! Even Thomas Rodriguez gets some kicks in! CROWD ......... COLE ...... COACH ........ Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and Princess Stacey look on with evil smiles on their faces. They both laugh maniacally as The Lightning Crew continues their beatdown on...the leader of The Lightning Crew! COLE Am...am I seeing things!? Is this really happening!? COACH It's really happening, Michael! After all these years, it's finally happened! The Lightning Crew has had enough of Tha Puerto Rican bossing them around! The crowd, having fallen in love with Tha Puerto Rican, starts booing loudly. But their boos don't stop the beatdown taking place on The Corporate...uh...The...Champ. Popick meanwhile is laughing it up outside the ring. COLE The Lightning Crew has turned on Tha Puerto Rican! THE LIGHTNING CREW HAS BETRAYED THA PUERTO RICAN! COACH Does this mean in the PR/Popick war, they side with Popick? COLE I'm afraid so. Cuban Wall and Mr. Boricua choke PRL with their feet. "P.R.!" "P.R.!" "P.R.!" "P.R.!" Vitamin X tells Wall and Boricua to back off, so that he can kick PRL right in the stomach! VITAMIN X BOO-YAH~! I'VE WAITED FOUR YEARS TO DO THAT! BOO-YAH~! Vitamin X does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle to celebrate. That is until Cuban Wall punches him in the jaw to stop him. COLE What a shocking event unfolding right in front of our very eyes! After four years, it appears that The Lightning Crew is history! COACH They're Popick's Crew now! Vitamin X kicks PRL in the stomach again. The Bone Thug gets on top of his cousin and starts hammering away with lefts and rights. He starts choking Tha Puerto Rican with his bare hands! Bone Thug gets off of PR. THE BONE THUG ARRIBA LA RAZA~! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" PRL is lying on the mat in a fetal position. His sunglasses and Puerto Rican flag bandana have been knocked off of him. Cuban Wall motions for The Lightning Crew to continue their beatdown, which they do so to more boos. POPICK HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! COLE The Lightning Crew is beating down Tha Puerto Rican and Stephen Joseph Popick couldn't be happier! COACH Things really are going his way! Stephen Joseph finally makes his way into the ring, holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt with his left hand and the microphone with his right hand. The Lightning Crew is still beating down Tha Puerto Rican. POPICK I thought *I* was The Most Hated Man In The OAOAST! Guess I'm not anymore! You've just lost ALL of your friends, P.R.! EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Popick rests on the ropes. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez strolls on over to Popick. COLE Oh no...don't tell me... Popick puts his left arm around the shoulders of a smiling Lindsay. POPICK And not only that, but you've lost the love of your life too. Your muse. Your motivation. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez. Or should I say, Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez-POPICK! That's right. Lindsay and I got married in a chapel early Monday morning in Las Vegas! We were waiting for the right moment to surprise you! What better time than now? Lindsay rests her head on Popick's left shoulder. POPICK And that little innocent peck on the cheek wasn't the only thing Lindsay gave me last Sunday night! OH~! COLE But she's PR's fiancee! COACH Not anymore she ain't! POPICK I love you, wifey! Stephen Joseph Popick makes out with Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez-Popick. The crowd boos. COLE Ugh! What a disgusting sight! Popick kissing a woman is disturbing! Lindsay removes her engagement ring and throws it down onto the mat with a look of disgust on her gorgeous face. POPICK Hey Lindsay, why don't you give PR one last kiss? Lindsay walks on over to where PRL is lying and picks him up by his hair. She smiles an evil grin at him. PRL is crushed. He mouths, "Why?" Lindsay's smile turns into a sneer. *SLAP!* Lindsay slaps PRL across the face! POPICK OH! OH HO HO HO! YOU GOT HIM GOOD! YOU GOT HIM GOOD, GIRL! Princess Stacey takes the opportunity to run over and kick PRL in the nuts with her right heel shoe! Cuban Wall then bounces off the ropes, jumps up, and comes crashing down onto Tha Puerto Rican with The Lightning Crew Splash! POPICK YES! YES! YES! THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT! THAT'S THE WAY MY CREW WORKS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAA! COLE This is unbelievable! Cuban Wall with The Lightning Crew Splash!...Is it still called The Lightning Crew Splash? Cuban Wall taunts his former boss! He stands up and raises his hands in the air to loud boos. Popick applauds him. COACH It's all over. It all ended in an instant. COLE The Lightning Crew has kicked out Tha Puerto Rican! They all just tossed him out like yesterday's garbage! COACH And now PRL's lying on the mat like yesterday's garbage! POPICK Come on! Continue beating him! I'm enjoying this! The Lightning Crew goes back to beating down on Tha Puerto Rican while Popick and Lindsay look on with evil smiles on their faces. Vitamin X takes a break from the beatdown to rest with Princess Stacey. They both laugh evilly. POPICK Who's gonna save you, huh? Who's gonna rescue you? Nobody! Nobody at all! You are a LOSER, P.R.! YOU ALWAYS WERE AND YOU ALWAYS WILL BE! Cuban Wall drops an elbow onto PRL! STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK YOU DON'T HAVE ANYONE ANYMORE, P.R.! YOU DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS! YOU HAVE NOTHING! YOU...ARE...NOTHING! Cuban Wall and The Bone Thug pick the weakened Puerto Rican up. Cuban Wall punches PRL in the face! The Bone Thug punches PRL in the face! Vitamin X fires off a punch. Then another punch. Then a Shane-O-Mac Shuffle, then he SPITS IN HIS RIGHT HAND, and then fires off a third punch! Then he does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle again. Thomas Rodriguez kicks PRL in the face. Wall motions for PRL to get picked up again. COLE The Lightning Crew is just demolishing their leader, or should I say, FORMER leader! COACH He's not the leader anymore! He's NOTHING! Cuban Wall picks Tha Puerto Rican up. A LOUD "P.R.!" chant starts up. Wall throws PR into the waiting arms of Mr. Boricua. Boricua clutches PRL's throat with his right hand. He then grabs PRL's white Lightning Crew T-shirt with his left hand. COLE Oh no! Don't tell me! Not this! Not a Chokeslam! COACH Do it Boricua! Do it! Do it! Break his damn neck! The Lightning Crew and Popick all wait for Mr. Boricua to deliver the Chokeslam. Mr. Boricua screams and yells. PRL is dazed and confused. The crowd is buzzing, fearful for Tha Puerto Rican's safety. Mr. Boricua lifts Tha Puerto Rican off the mat. Suddenly, the crowd starts cheering. Really LOUDLY. Because who should slide into the ring but the one and only COLOMBIAN HEAT! POPICK Colombian Heat attacks Mr. Boricua from behind, causing him to drop PRL! He then turns Boricua around, and starts pummeling him in the face! COLE COLOMBIAN HEAT! COLOMBIAN HEAT IS HERE! COACH WHAT DOES HE WANT!? COLE HE'S SAVING THA PUERTO RICAN! HE'S ACTUALLY SAVING THA PUERTO RICAN! Cuban Wall rushes towards Heat, so Heat hammers him with forearms to the face, dazing him! Vitamin X is up next, and one punch knocks him down! The Bone Thug rushes towards Heat, and Heat beats on him and then sends him to the ropes, following up with an AJ Styles-like dropkick! Thomas Rodriguez charges, but when he sees Colombian Heat look at him, he backs off. COLE Colombian Heat coming to Tha Puerto Rican's aid for the first time in three long years! Heat goes back to Mr. Boricua, knocking him loopy with forearms to the face. He then whips Boricua into the ropes, and hits him with a leg lariat, knocking him down to the mat! Heat follows that up with the "Where The Hood At!?" Rolling Thunder onto Boricua! At this point, Popick himself goes for a punch--BLOCKED! Heat hammers away on the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion to the crowd's delight! COLE Heat taking it to the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion! Heat stuns Popick enough that he can whip him into the ropes. But Popick stops in his tracks, holding onto the ropes so that he can quickly escape out of the ring! Stephen Joseph grabs the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt from the mat and begins walking up the entrance ramp, soon joined by his new wife, Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez-Popick! COLE Colombian Heat is actually HELPING Tha Puerto Rican! COACH Does Tha Puerto Rican even realize this? Vitamin X hammers Heat from behind! He unleashes lefts and rights onto the back of the neck of the Colombian superstar! The crowd boos loudly. But then, X is turned around by Tha Puerto Rican, who starts nailing The X-Man with Rock-style punches to the temple! Punch! Punch! Punch! NOW KISS THAT LEFT! Punch! Vitamin X goes flying over the top rope and onto the floor! COLE Vitamin X is out of the ring! Tha Puerto Rican is back on his feet! COACH Princess Stacey, check on him! And indeed, Princess Stacey exits the ring to go check on Vitamin X. Meanwhile, Colombian Heat is taking it to The Bone Thug. PRL does some shaky leg kicks on Mr. Boricua and then literally kicks him out of the ring. He then spots Thomas Rodriguez cowering in a corner. Thomas begs off, but PRL grabs the Official Referee Of The Lightning Crew and starts nailing him with Rock-style punches to the temple which the crowd greatly enjoys! COACH HE'S A REFEREE, FOR CHRISSAKES! Punch! Punch! Punch! NOW KISS THAT LEFT! PUNCH! Thomas Rodriguez is sent out of the ring by way of a PRL Rock-style punch to the temple! At the same time, Colombian Heat throws The Bone Thug over the top rope and onto the floor! COLE PRL and Colombian Heat have cleared the ring of all but one wrestler! That wrestler? Cuban Wall. Who is just now shaking the cobwebs out. Wall goes to attack P.R., but Puerto is ready for him, attacking once again with The Rock-style punches to the temple! Colombian Heat helps out, punching Cuban Wall in the face at the same time as Tha Puerto Rican! "YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" PR and Heat get Wall good and stunned with their punches. Wall goes to rest on the ring ropes. So, Colombian Heat and Tha Puerto Rican LINK HANDS... "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" ...and together, clothesline The Muscle Of The Lightning Crew OVER the top rope and onto the floor! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Both PRL and Heat fall over the top ring rope too, but hold on, skinning the cat back in simutainlesly! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE They're all gone! Popick! Wall! Boricua! Thomas Rodriguez! The Bone Thug! Vitamin X! And it's all thanks to PRL and Colombian Heat! Colombian Heat plays to the crowd while PRL paces back and forth. They bump into each other. Heat and PR turn around and stand face-to-face. They stare at each other. The crowd is buzzing. They start talking. The crowd is getting louder. COLE Are they? Are they... Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat embrace in the center of the ring! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE Yes! Yes! They've reunited! They're friends again! COACH That makes me want to RETCH! PRL and Colombian Heat high-ten each other! They then hype each other up and hype the crowd up. Both men, both loved by the fans now, play to the adoring public. As this happens inside the ring, outside of the ring, Stephen Joseph Popick is witnessing this reunion between old friends on the entrance ramp with the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in his right hand and his left arm over Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez-Popick's shoulders. Princess Stacey is helping Vitamin X up the entrance ramp too. Since the other Lightning Crew men have no women of their own, they have to help themselves up the entrance ramp, Cuban Wall, Mr. Boricua, Thomas Rodriguez, and The Bone Thug holding their necks, stomachs, jaws, and backs in pain, respectively. COLE What an emotional moment! Best friends reunited! And it feels so good! COACH Not for me it doesn't! Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat taunt The Lightning Crew and Stephen Joseph Popick. PRL grabs the microphone. THA PUERTO RICAN Hey! Hey! Hey Popick! Popick! I guess you were wrong! Looks like I have some friends after all! Not only that, but I have the best damn friend any guy could ever have! And together, Colombian Heat and I WILL make you feel the Heat UP IN THIS-- "BI-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~!" The crowd cheers. PRL hands the microphone over to Heat. COLOMBIAN HEAT Yeah! Yeah! YEEAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! We is gonna mess you up real bad, G! Youse is gonna paid, playa for what'chu did to P.R. You, and all those suckas in The Lightning Crew! Youse is gonna go down HARD like a hooker in Times Square...or Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez on a guy in Times Square! Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez-Popick acts offended by that remark. HEAT Tha Puerto Rican is back, yo! And he is back on the attack! And that's the truth, Ruth! THE CHAMP HAS SPO-- PRL Whoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoa! Whoa! WHOA! Colombian Heat is shocked. So is the crowd. COLE What? PRL Heat, Tha Puerto Rican loves you like a brother. But don't you ever, AND THA PUERTO RICAN MEANS EVER, use Tha Puerto Rican's catchphrases again! Colombian Heat nods his head. HEAT A'ight. Cool. PRL Besides, you didn't do it right. You gotta do it like this. Tha Puerto Rican stands in the middle of the ring. He bends down. He tilts his head back. He raises the microphone to his lips. THA PUERTO RICAN THE CHAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMP...HAS...SPO-KUN~! "Know Your Role '99" starts playing. PRL throws the microphone aside. He shakes Heat's left hand and then pulls him in for a hug. PRL and Heat both have smiles on their faces. The Lightning Crew and Popick are disgusted at what they've just seen. PRL and Heat turn their attention to the outside. They both have cocky smirks on their faces. COLE What a turn of events! We've just witnessed the end of the P.R./Popick alliance, PRL getting kicked out of The Lightning Crew, AND PRL reuniting with Colombian Heat, all in the span of 20 minutes! COACH The OAOAST is changing, Cole! This will lead to monumental changes in the near future, I can feel it! COLE Yes. Tha Puerto Rican's career will never be the same again! COACH Damn right! Not after Popick gets done with him! When that day comes, PRL is SCREWED! And there'll be nothing Colombian Heat can do about that! Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat continue taunting The Lightning Crew and Stephen Joseph Popick. Stephen Joseph Popick taunts back, raising the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt in the air and pointing to it. The rest of The Lightning Crew just stare at Heat and PRL with evil intentions. PRL tells Popick to "JUST BRING IT!" but Popick just continues running his mouth. COLE I guess Tha Puerto Rican ain't The Corporate Champion anymore. COACH I guess not. He never deserved that title anyway. COLE Weren't you on his jock just an hour ago? COACH Yes. But Popick was right. PRL is a loser! COLE Oh come on. The Lightning Crew and their newly elected leader begin walking back up the entrance ramp, all of them not taking their eyes off of the newly reformed team of Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat. Heat and PRL stare right at them too, and every wrestler, valet and referee in the ringside area runs their mouths as "Know Your Role '99" continues playing and the crowd cheers. COLE The Lightning Crew have kicked out their old leader and apparently have gotten themselves a new leader! Tha Puerto Rican has reunited with his former and now CURRENT best friend Colombian Heat! And this show is just getting started! We've already seen some of the aftermath of November Reign and I assure you that there's more fallout to come! Don't go away! We'll be right back after these messages! Stephen Joseph Popick holds the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship high up in the air as he continues walking back to the entrance. He taunts both Colombian Heat and Tha Puerto Rican. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez-Popick, Vitamin X, Princess Stacey, Cuban Wall, Mr. Boricua, The Bone Thug, and Thomas Rodriguez all glare angrily at the duo inside the ring. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat both flip both their middle fingers at The Lightning Crew and then continue jaw jacking with them as "Know Your Role '99" continues playing and the crowd cheers loudly. This is the last image we see before we fade out. FADE TO BLACK Commercials

BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen November Reign continues to Reign, because it is time for our mainevent of the evening.....a TEN PERSON SURIVOR SERIES ELIMINATION MATCH! VS WHIRRR WHIRRR Doctor, doctor, give me the news I've got a bad case of lovin' you No pill's gonna cure my ill I've got a bad case of lovin' you Bellow the frantic flowing of the red ambulance lights, the entrance doors rip apart, allowing The Love Doctors, clad in bright orange tights that shamelessly cling to their “medical instruments”, to step into full view of the Portland audience. Moving in flawless synchronization, they delicately and alluringly glide their fingers down proud, muscular chests, to sexy washboard abs, and right to the two pieces of hardware the majority of women would love to have inside their toolbox. Unfortunately the ladies' chances to be lost in fantasies of playing doctor with the two hunks falls by the wayside, when the much less attractive Vinny Valentine and Tony Tourettes rush onto the scene! Oblivious to the fact that people are actually offering him money to put a shirt on, Vinny V busts out a disco dance that wasn't even cool in 1975. With the moment ruined, The Docs can only trudge down the apron, trying to distance themselves from their creepy cohorts. COACH Forget Robert Palmer they shoulda come out to Undertaker's old themesong. DEAD MAN WALKING! These dudes is done for! BUFFER Now making their way to the ring, representing team Krista, introducing first being accompanied by his cousin Tony Tourette, he is from Brooklyn, New York, the Disco Duck, VINNY VALENTINE! And his partners from The Windy City, Doctor Max Anderson, Doctor Steven Pigley...THE LOVE DOCTORS! As the trio climb the steel steps into the ring, Maroon 5's smash hit replaces The Doc's old school track. Give me something to believe in Cause I don’t believe in you anymore Anymore I wonder if it even makes a difference to try (Yeah) So this is goodbye Like lava from a volcano, an army of teenage girls erupts from their seats in anticipation for Shayne Brave's arrival. Floods of tears rush down their heavily massacred faces, while they profess an undying love and admiration for the six man champion. Showtime certainly doesn't disappoint, leaping through the parted entrance doors with enough energy to light the entire state. His elegantly decorated denim jacket crumples to the floor, ripped away in an exuberance that sees him dart to each side of the entry way to whip his fanbase into further frenzy. COACH This sad clown, who ain't got it through his head that he and his boy, Tyler, is crushing on a butch lez, actually volunteered to be on this team! To quote King from Platoon, “You signed up for this shit?!”, and to quote Junior from the same film “Damn, youse a stupid motherfucker!” BUFFER And their partner, from Motown, he weighed in at one hundred eighty three pounds, he is one third of the OAOAST six man champions....SHOWTIME SHAYNE BRAVE! Aided by blinding speed, Shayne rushes down the ramp, making sure to slap hands with the legion of audience members in the front row. He then slides into the ring, where he receives his biggest pop yet. "KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!" I like them black girls I like them white girls I like them asian girls I like them mixed raced girls I like them spanish girls I like them italian girls I like the french girls And I like Scandanavian girls A tidal wave of stunningly beautiful black, white, Asian, and mixed race, girls, wash ashore on the entrance stage, all dressed to impress (and undress) in nurse outfits. Repeated flashes of blue, purple and pink spotlights lights showcase gyrating hips, flexing svelte bodies, and long legs that turn and twist with the tempo of the bouncing music From a raised camera angle it almost looks like fairies fluttering through the magical garden of Shakespeare's Mid summer night's dream. At the very center of this lush jungle of female beauty, stands the most captivating creature of all, Krista Isadora Duncan. The camera ventures up from glossy high heels, towards tanned legs that disappear into an ever-so-tight ever-so-short micro-mini black skirt, and full firm breasts that bulge out a rhinestone encrusted halter top. Suddenly Krista becomes the center of a small universe, fawned over by the array of lovely dancers. However, she puts on a mask of arrogance, smirking with indifference as she pushes them away, and heads down the ramp. BUFFER And the team captain, from Los Angeles, California, she is a best selling author, a fitness queen, and star of the world famous FIT with KID line of exercise videos, she is Miss California Krista Isaodra Duncan! I Get All The Girls I Get All The Girls I Get All The Girls I Get All The Girls The ramp has undergone a significant metamorphisis, its cold emotionless steel flooring is now carpeted by resplendent pink and red glitter that sparkles wonderfully into the night. In an occurence reminiscent of a Paris runway, fashion photographers and journalists, all dressed in the same black dress shirts and slacks, work tirelessly to capture the image of Krista strutting along this majestic décor with the grace and style of a supermodel. As wind machines playfully blow her flowing blond locks in front her entrancing face, the photographers trail her path creating a whimsical light show with the roving pink and purple spotlights. Once she reaches the end of the ramp, her hands fall to her slender hips, and her face tilts backwards, bathing in the wind machine's touch while she beams and arresting smirk into the camera. COLE Broken heart or not, Krista knows how to do things in style! And that may come in handy tonight, because her team seems to be sorely lacking in substance. And of course, there's Mackenzie DeCenzo to blame for her bad draw. But, I think the question here tonight is how are Alix and Krista going to be able to fight each other if it comes down to that? Krista's team welcomes her into the ring with open arms. Quite literally, which is not good because Tony Tourette smells like he's been humping cow shit. I'm the teacher and you're the student Pay attention and I'll show you how we do it!! SHOUT! YEAH! Get off your ass and dance OH YEAH! Forget about romance, YEAH! and you can come here for the party! Come along YEAH! Play my favorte song OH YEAH! The one that turns me on, YEAH! and you can come here for the party! Shout! YEAAAA.....BOOOOO! Why the sudden change of emotion for an audience that was once delighted to see Alix Maria Spezia? Because the competitor they actually see first is the khaki pants outfitted Christian Wright, smugly gazing at an audience that despises him so much. Moneymaker takes position at his right, chuckling at the storm of anger that builds in the arena. Towering behind them stands Christopher Patrick Allen, cigar in mouth, and bouncing back and forth in his black MMA style trunks. Pushing his way to the front of the group is Biff Atlas, tiny aquamarine trunks showing off a slender underwear model worthy body. Bringing up the rear is Mackenzie DeCenzo, her magnificent figure enhanced by a tight beaded evening gown. Attired in an ass-tastic pair of black booty shorts decorated by a small pink skull, a skimpy pink tube top, and matching pink headband, Alix clings onto Mackenzie's arm, almost as if she were pleading for a way out the match. COLE In two weeks The Enterprise has gone from being the single most cohesive company in the OAOAST, to the most dysfunctional in history. And it all centers around Alix Maria Spezia and Mackenzie DeCenzo. I don't know what's going to happen, but my prediction is that a company where one member wants two others tarred and feather, and another wants to exploit one member for every dollar she's worth, is not long for this world. As Buffer makes his announcement, the camera captures Krista's blue eyes taking sad, longing looks towards her lost lover, Alix. The brunette tries to avert her gaze, instead burying her head within Mackenzie's streaming blond hair. BUFFER And the opponents! Introducing first from Venice Beach, California, he weighed in at two hundred twenty pounds, he is Mr. Recyclable NRG, and Bono's Favourite Wrestler, BIFF ATLASSSSSSSSSS! And from Vero Beach, Florida, weighing in at two hundred thirty seven pounds, he The Billion Dollar Heir , The CEO of The Enterprise, and TSM's largest investor, THEODORE MONEYMAKKERRR! From Youngstown, Ohio, weighing in at a muscled two hundred eighty pounds, CHRISTOPHER PATRICK ALLEN! Now residing in The Nation's Capital, Washington D.C., he weighed in at 8 1/3 bars of gold, he is The Natural Christian Wright! And the team captain, from Los Angeles, California, she is the CEO of Miss Spezia's sweeties, and The Enterprise's Head Of Technical Tactics Identifying Excellence, or HOTTIE for short, The Hollywood Bad Girl, ALIX MARIA SPEZIAA! Together they are TEAM ALLIIXXXX! The announcement of Alix's name allows the audience to end their onrush of boos with a raucous ovation. But that's not enough to quell Alix's nerves, and she continues to cling onto Mackenzie while trying to avoid eye contact with Krista. Not overly concerned with Alix's feelings, Christian Wright orders her to stay out of the way for the course of the match. COLE I just can't believe that Mackenzie would willingly remain associated with a group that frankly despises her to the point where they wish her an eternity in hell? Is Moneymaker's cash that powerful? Very eager to impress a certain billionaire, Biff heartily volunteers to begin the contest for his team, even pushing his way past Allen, who had deemed himself the starter. Though Allen isn't fond of Biff's behavior, he can only bite his tounge and return to the ring apron at Moneymaker's orders. Across the way, Vinny Valentine anoints himself as the starter without any input from his teammates.

BUFFER The following... (re-reads notes)... Six-Man Tag Team contest is scheduled for one fall! "The Church Of Hot Addiction" by Cobra Starship hits as planned as we're ready for our next, adjusted match of the evening, the OAOAST's resident odd couple (well, one of many) making their way to the ring. James Blonde swaggers out in his faux fur coat with a confident grin on his face. Probably because he's got Faqu backing him up, the 300+ pound Samoan marching behind his tag team partner, wiggling his fingers in preperation for the fight ahead. BUFFER Introducing at this time, team number one. First, from Vancouver, British Columbia... two hundred, eight pounds... "THE MOVER FROM VANCOUVER" JJAAAAAAAMMEEEEEESSSS BBLLLLLLLOOOOOOONNDDEEEEE!! And, from The Isle Of Samoa, weighing three hundred and one pounds... "THE SAMOAN WRECKING BALL"... FFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAQQUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" As Blonde and Faqu make it to the ring, Blonde takes a detour around the ring to have it out with a group of four fans holding up signs that read "WHO" "ARE" "YOU" "AGAIN?". Faqu climbs the steps without his partner, the savage Samoan sending Buffer and referee Chioda cowering into a corner. "Chelsea Dagger" by The Fratellis then cues to round out the team. COACH I wish those morons would stop holding those signs up. Our roster is too big. We get it. The lights alternate between red, white and blue through the intro of the song, before Black marches out and raises his arms in the air. Having now rolled in, Blonde applauds Black from the ring, while the Brit marches to the ring. BUFFER And, their tag team partner. He hails from London, England... weighing in at two hundred and thirty eight pounds... NNAAAATTHHAAANNIIIIEEEEELLLLLL... BBLLLLLLAAAAAAAAACCKK!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" BUFFER Together, they are, INTERNATIONALLY KNOWN!! Instead of entering in any 'conventional' way, Black slides partway under the bottom rope so he's facing into the crowd and bridges up to his feet. Black throws his arms over his head again, with Blonde still sycophantically applauding him and Faqu still... well, being Faqu. COLE These three men, responsible for putting Jamie O'Hara out of commission and again, we want to send our best wishes to Jamie as he recovers at home. Faqu and Blonde, only recently returned from suspensions for their part in the ambush and Nathaniel Black just returning tonight. COACH Long overdue if you ask me. COLE So, you don't think he should have been punished for that debacle at Zero Hour? COACH He got suspended for sixty days for making soccer interesting. David Beckham gets paid hundreds of thousands of dollars a week trying to do the exact same thing. As the three former HI-YAH superstars group in the ring, the always rocking "Rock You Like A Hurricane" rocks through the arena, the opening guitar riff accompanied by a big cheer for The Christ Air Express! The twin brothers jog onto the stage and hit a leaping double-high five, before marching on to the ring with hand-slaps for all! Following them out is one of their legions of sisters, Melody Nerdly, pulling double duty for the night. BUFFER And their opponents... now residing in Laguna Beach, California! They weigh in a total combined weight of three hundred, seventy five pounds... here are MARV and MEL, THE CHRIST AIR... EEEEEXXXXPPRRRREEEEESSSSSSS!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE The Christ Air Express who've got this unnamed 'advisor' working with them behind the scenes, whom we can only assume is not Melody. COACH What gives it away, the fact they're trying to become less of a joke? In slide MARV and MEL, working the crowd as the trio of Internationally Known look on unimpressed from their corner. The CAE then remove their customised jackets, showing off their new ring gear in all it's blue and orange glory. BUFFER And, introducing their tag team partner... .:CUE: "Rock The Casbah", Trust Company:. "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Oh boy! Suddenly, the multi-national Internationally Known trio don't look quite so confident as to the delight of the Portland natives, LEON RODEZ emerges onto the stage! With a shrug of the shoulders, Leon makes his way down the aisle with some more hand-slaps... culminating with one with Melody Nerdly once he reaches the ring, stopping as he makes it to the ring steps and posing atop them. BUFFER From Grand Rapids, Michigan... he weighs two hundred, twenty pounds and is one third of the OAOAST 6-Man Tag Team Champions of the World... "SILKY SMOOTH"... LLLLEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOONN... RRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" In jumps Leon with a flourish, high-fiving with his tag partners as Melody watches on with a wry grin. COACH You know, those two make such a great couple. COLE Uh, Coach, Leon's dating Maggie Nerdly. COACH I thought that was Maggie. COLE Nope. That's Melody. COACH Oh. Oh, how embarrassing. *DINGDINGDING!* Bell sounds and after some brief discussion, MEL decides to start things off for his team. No surprise on the other side, after sixty days out Nathaniel Black is more than ready and takes the lead for Internationally Known. COLE MEL and MARV, they really couldn't have gotten themselves a better partner. One third of the 6-Man Tag Champs, coming off his sole surviving role at November Reign. But it's MEL to start off here, with Nathaniel Black. A little foolishly, MEL tries to start things off by locking up with the Englishman. Seconds later, he ends up on his ass as Black just throws him away. Sitting up, MEL looks a little surprised but shakes it off and tries again. Same result though as Black again throws him off, laughing off the challenge posed by the Christ Airer. After a few choice cockney words Black then moves in and throws an elbow... but MEL ducks! A couple of quick right hands rock Black before MEL locks on a side headlock, only to find himself thrown off again, this time into the ropes. Back shoots MEL, going low with a baseball slide which Black just about manages to hurdle. But as soon as he gets his footing back, he's taken down by a Springboard Forearm by MARV!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Seeing an opportunity, Leon comes into the ring and lures Blonde in after him. Of course, referee Chioda puts a stop to that. Allowing Leon to sneak back into the corner and watch on with a smile as The Christ Air Express hit Black with a Double Inverted Atomic Drop... and then a Double Russian Legsweep! COLE Great teamwork by the twins, MARV and MEL! COACH Illegal teamwork. MEL covers... 1... 2... No! Wringing out the arm, MEL tags out to MARV. MARV heads up top and drops an elbow across the outstretched arm, then wrings it out... but takes a knee to the gut from Black! A European Uppercut then sends MARV stumbling backwards into a neutral corner dazed. COACH See, this is all Black wants to do. He just wants to wrestle. None of this penalty shootout stuff, none of these flippy-do-dads, no two on one double-teams. Just pure wrestling. Irish whip by Black sends MARV corner to corner. Up and over the top goes MARV though, landing on his feet behind Black and catching him as he turns around for a hiptoss. Black blocks though, turning around and into a hammerlock. As he wrenches on the hold, he's distracted though by Leon, as he comes into the ring and again goads Blonde after him. Chioda cuts off Blonde, allowing MEL to come in and hit the ropes, MARV ducking the dropkick which ends up knocking Black off his feet! COACH Come on, this is ridiculous! The Christ Air Express quickly send Black off the ropes and hit a Double Hiptoss, while Blonde is still busy whining at the fact he can't come into the ring but his opponents apparantly can. As Chioda finally gets Blonde out he turns to Leon and warns him, getting the puppy-dog treatment from The Silky Smooth One who pleads his innocence. Meanwhile, MARV follows up on Black with a Standing Moonsault! 1... 2... No! Applying a side headlock, MARV tries to keep control of Black as he gets to his feet. Black goes to the gut with a forearm. And again. And a third time, breaking the headlock and allowing him to pop MARV with a forearm to the jaw! COLE Black, very physical, as MARV found out there. COACH And all the more physical when you piss him off. Pulling MARV back up, Black lands with another forearm which this time doesn't knock MARV down, thanks mostly to the ring ropes. Black pulls him off the ropes with an irish whip and then ducks his head for a backdrop. Leapfrog by MARV though, stopping as he lands and connecting on a boot, before setting up a suplex... ...which does not succeed. COACH Yeah, nice try. Seeing that his partner is having some difficulties, Leon comes into the ring again and shoves Blonde in the chest to lure him back in. Unfortunately, this time Leon succeeds in getting Faqu's attention too and drawing him in. LEON Leon takes a comical spill to the floor to get out of Faqu's dodge, the Samoan left to field questions from referee Chioda. The distraction works all the same then, allowing MEL to come back in and help out MARV with a Double Suple... ...NO! With Chioda distracted by Faqu, James Blonde is finally able to come in and put a stop to the move. Rubbing his hands with glee, he then sets up beside Black, ready to take over MEL with a Suplex. Unfortunately, Faqu is a little slow on the uptake and keeps Chioda distracted, long enough for Leon to come back in. Quickly he grabs a hold of Blonde and together with MARV and MEL, they take Blonde and Black over with the Suplexes!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE TRIPLE SUPLEX SPOT~! Faqu is able to get away from Chioda now, ready to pounce on The Christ Air Express. Rodez gets to his feet in front of them though and to his shock, finds himself right in Faqu's eyeline. After a second of panic, The Silky Smooth One sees a big strike coming his way... LEON OH MY GOD, WHAT IS THAT!? ...and points up at the ceiling. Like any good half-witted Samoan would Faqu looks up wondering what amazing thing could have caught Leon's gaze... which allows MARV and MEL to clip out the knees with Double Basement Dropkicks, causing Faqu to faceplant into the canvas!! COACH Okay, I stand corrected. This is ridiculous. With Melody applauding away on the floor, MARV and MEL now turn their attentions to the outside where Black and Blonde have gathered on the outside trying to collect themselves. Taking off into the ropes, The Christ Air Express then experience some major air as they soar out over the top, MARV taking out Black with a SOMERSAULT PLANCHA, while MEL soars through the ropes at Blonde with a TOPÉ!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH So, did I miss the part where this suddenly stopped being a six-man TAG team match, or what? COLE Since when were you such a big fan of pure wrestling? Left alone in the ring with Faqu, Leon waits for the big Samoan to get off his knees... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and lays into him with a chop. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and another, neither of which seem to do much damage to Faqu. Hesitating a little... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...Leon hits a third anyway, but is clearly beginning to realise that he might just be wasting his time. Especially when Faqu turns and growls at him, beating his own chest and showing that he's feeling no effects. LEON Uh... ...OHMYGODLOOKOVERTHERERIGHTNOWii Embarrasingly, Faqu falls for the exact same trick a second time in a row (trust me kids, it really works, try it at home). Only problem is, this time Rodez doesn't have The Christ Air Express waiting to strike. And by the time he goes to chop Faqu again, he gets cut off by a thrust to the throat anyway! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Away staggers Leon, followed into the corner by Faqu who rains down on him with some overhand shots to the head. Leon tries desperately to cover up under the beating, which Faqu barely stops before referee Chioda reaches a five count. Faqu pulls Rodez out of the corner and then drops him with a big Headbutt, giving the stereotypers of the wrestling world yet more to work with. "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" The crowd are whipped up by Melody on the outside as Leon groggily tries to sit up, stomped back down by the barefoot of Faqu. Referee Chioda has apparantly grabbed whatever control he can as The CAE return to their corner, leaving Faqu and Rodez as legal men all of a sudden. Which is presumably why Faqu is allowed to drop another big Headbutt on Leon and make a cover... 1... 2... No! Back on the corner too are Blonde and Black, Blonde now taking a tag from Faqu. The Mover From Vancouver takes out his frustrations from earlier out on Leon with some stomps, stopping only to incite the crowd by blowing them all a kiss reminiscent of a certain Silky Smooth One. COACH First The Heavenly Rockers beat him down, now he's stuck in this match. If this is what Leon gets for dating a Nerdly, maybe I'll pass. COLE Speaking of The Heavenly Rockers, let's not forget next week in Tacoma, Washington, it'll be the brother/sister team of Leon and Jade Rodez up again Logan Mann and Hollywood... or, as they prefer to be known as, "Lolly". You know, giving yourselves and your marriage a collective name seems a little OTT if you ask me. COACH If you knew true love, you'd know the beauty that is Lolly. COLE Riiight. Blonde executes a snap suplex on Leon, coming off the ropes and following it up with a Double Stomp! Blonde then attempts the cover... 1... 2... No! Blonde looks a little frustrated at the count and decides to blame it on Melody Nerdly, for no reason other than to try and distract referee Chioda while he lays on a blatant choke! "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOU..." Breaking just in time, Blonde makes another cover... 1... 2... No! Applying a front facelock, Blonde drags Leon over to the Internationally Known corner and lets Nathaniel Black tag himself back into the match. Black quickly drills Leon with an uppercut to the ribs, then as Blonde lets him go lands a big European Uppercut! COLE Man! When Black hits you, you stay hit! COACH Yeah, just ask Jamie O'Hara. Oh, wait, you can't, I forgot. COLE Uncalled for. Black brings Leon into the centre of the ring and slows the match down now, locking on a British 3/4 headlock and leaning in on it, sinking Rodez down. Rodez tries to get some crowd support going and Melody, MARV and MEL all join the cause, while Black continues to torque away on the neck. A couple of knees to the face take away any fight Leon might have had though, Black satisfied that after that Leon must be done and flipping him onto his back, lateral press... 1... 2... No! As Leon sits up, Black applies a rear chinlock, really clamping the forearms across the cheekbones to make the move as uncomfortable as possible. COACH See, this is what I was talking about. This is Nathaniel Black's way, a way which I personally respect and one which people like AngleSault and Jamie O'Hara... and these idiots in Portland clearly don't! COLE Well, I agree that the OAOAST is a worldwide company and it's great to have diverse styles, like that of Nathaniel Black. I don't think that's the problem. The problem is, the way Black has been going about trying to 'force' that respect from people in a way which really hasn't endeared himself to anyone. With the crowd rallying again, Leon manages to fight to his feet in the hold. Black still keeps the hands locked, until Rodez fires away on the gut with a trio of quick, short elbows. Irish whip attempt by Rodez is reversed though, Black sending him for the ride and swinging with a clothesline... NO, ducked, Leon coming off the ropes again... ...and getting MOWN down with a Running Forearm by Black!! COACH Now that's some impact right there! Tag is made to James Blonde, the Canadian quickly setting himself up on the middle rope. Kissing the fist, Blonde then leaps, coming down with the Marty Jannetty Fistdrop! Hook of the leg by Blonde... 1... 2... KICKOUT! COLE Only two. Blonde and Faqu had been on a great winning run right up until that suspension for their part in the O'Hara injury and since then, things have stalled a little. They and Black could really use a win here. Blonde sends Rodez into one of the neutral corners head first, then into the opposite corner with an irish whip. Following in, Blonde connects with the clothesline and quickly grabs the head, looking to chain it with the Bulldog... ...but gets CAUGHT! Leon catches onto Blonde in mid-air and spins him around, sitting out with a big Blue Thunder Bomb to bring the crowd off their seats!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE IT'S DA BOOM! And it could be the chance for Leon to get over and tag either MARV or MEL here! The three Nerdly siblings encourage Leon to get over and make the tag, having been unable to follow up his big move with a cover. Blonde also needs the tag and has the advantage on Leon, able to get over to his corner quicker and reach up a shaky hand for Black to tag in. The Brit quickly grabs onto Leon's ankle and pulls him from the corner, agonisingly close to making the tag, to the despair of The Christ Air Express. Black then hauls Leon to his feet and... *SMACK!* ...GETS CRACKED WITH AN ENZIGURI!! *SLAP!* "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" COLE There's the tag! Here comes MARV! Rushing into the ring, MARV goes right for Faqu and dropkicks him off the apron... *CRASH!* ...CAUSING HIM TO FALL FACE-FIRST INTO THE RING STEPS!! MARV then speeds back towards Black, hitting the ropes in front as he gets to his feet and knocking him down with a Flying Forearm! A dropkick then knocks Black down! And another, MARV really feeling it now and throwing up some "RAWK"! COLE The pace hasn't so much quickened as exploded here! Quick tag is made to MEL, The Christ Air Express combining as they take Black to the PEARLY GATES with an Enziguri/Flatliner combination!! COLE That could do it right there! MEL makes the cover, MARV keeping guard... 1... 2... KICKOUT! MARV cuts off Blonde's late attempt at a save and keeps on the attack on him, while MEL heads up top. Not wasting any time with the crowd he quickly reaches the top... but it still doesn't help him as Black makes a sudden dive for the ropes, managing to crotch MEL across the top turnbuckle!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE And I suppose that constitutes 'pure wrestling', does it Coach? COACH Hey, worked for me. Melody looks on in horror at her brother's misfortune, as do many of the females in attendance. Over goes Black to help out Blonde, clubbing MARV from behind and dragging him away. An irish whip sends MARV into a corner, Black just a couple of steps behind him and crushing him against the turnbuckles with a Flying Knee Attack! Black then bundles MARV out of the corner and right into the path of James Blonde, who lays him out with a diving clothesline. COACH There's some great teamwork for ya. Black sits back as Blonde now signals for the end. Jumping over MARV's body he dives at the ropes, ready to execute the Lionsault... ...but Rodez from out of nowhere jumps onto the apron, catching Blonde as he comes out of the air and hanging him up across the top rope!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" Over rushes Black, but he takes a shoulder to the gut from Leon from through the ropes. The Englishman then staggers backwards into the path of the soaring MEL, recovered enough to set up top and come flying with a Missile Dropkick!! Black is sent rolling all the way out of the ring, while MEL stays down nursing his obvious discomfort down below. COLE It has broken down again, the referee has lost all control! COACH And just like last time, it's Rodez who's causing it all! Looking a little lost, up staggers Blonde, walking right into a jab! A jab! A jab! A jab! Rodez turns, blowing the kiss, before turning back on his heels... *SMACK!* ...and nailing Blonde upside the head with the enziguri! "YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT! As soon as Blonde hits the mat, he's rolled back up to his feet by Leon and palmed off in the direction of The Christ Air Express. MARV and MEL just about get to their feet in time to catch Blonde, setting him up and GIVING HIM THE HAPPY ENDING!! (not that kind) COACH Three on one. Three. On. One! With MEL still hurting, it's MARV makes the cover... 1... Leon knocks Faqu off the apron again... 2... 3!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE That's gonna do it! Melody jumps for joy as the three comes down, a more subdued Leon ready to fend off any more attacks with a deadly kung-fu stance for no apparant reason. BUFFER Here are your winners... the team of LEON RODEZ and THE CHRIST... AIR... EXPRESSSSSSSSSSS!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" "Rock You Like A Hurricane" pumps through the arena again as Melody slides in to check on her brothers. She also thanks Leon for helping out of course, as he certainly played his part. COLE Great action here, Leon Rodez and the CAE coming out on top. Still to come, Survivor Series showdown, don't go anywhere! OAOAST HeldDOWN~! MAIN EVENT TIME Team Alix vs. Team Krista NEXT!

"Thriller" by Fall Out Boy cues up and the horn dogs in attendance go wild as Melody Nerdly bounces out on stage and fires her imaginary pistols, triggering a blast of pyro from under the stage and the emergence of Jock Mulligan and Baron Windels. COLE Earlier today we caught up with the Lone Star Gunslingers, so let’s hear from them right now. * SWOOSH * A small box settles in at the left hand corner of the screen, as Melody and the Gunslingers appear in front of their CG backdrop -- a snorting bull whose residue spells the team’s name. MELODY JOCK Howdy. The Lone Star Gunslingers here with a message to all our fans and the Heavenly Rockers. Synth, Logan, you got off mighty easily at November Reign. You see, Baron and I vowed when the dust settled justice would be served, but snakes like yourselves have a funny way of eluding justice. You can run but you can’t hide. BARON As far as we’re concerned, Heavenly Rockers, you can go off and do your own thing. After all you are the World tag team champions, meaning you have the right to sit on those tag titles for as long as you want. But you will have to defend them eventually and against us. When that time comes you can bet your bottom dollar we’ll be ready. * SWOOSH * BUFFER The following tag team contest, one fall with a 15 minute time limit. Introducing first, already in the ring, from parts unknown, the dreaded Mr. X! His tag team partner, from Mobile, Alabama, 277 pound, Dennis Huckleberry! “BOO!” Mr. X is your typical old school masked -- and overweight -- jobber. Likewise for his partner. They antagonized the crowd while the Gunslingers make their way to the ring. BUFFER Their opponents, accompanied by everybody’s favorite gal pal MELODY NERDLY...from San Antonio, Texas, total combine weight 497 pounds, Baron Windels and the "Texas Twister" Jock Mulligan... THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGEERRRRRSSSS!! Heavy underdogs, the masked Mr. X and Dennis Huckleberry jump Jock and Baron the very second they step through the ropes. MELODY COACH I reckon, in the orders of the Gunslingers, this isn’t quite how they planned on starting the match, Cole. COLE Most certainly not, but they’re going up against two men looking to make a name for themselves. We’re approaching the wintertime, but the competition in the OAOAST is hot and heavy. * DINGDINGDING * Irish whip, but the Gunslingers leapfrog X and Huckleberry on the rebound and level them with a pair of dropkicks. The TX Twister whips X into the ropes and catches him with a lariat. The cover! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! A tag is made, and as Melody fires her imaginary pistols outside, Baron fires off a couple of live rounds inside, staggering Mr. X with big time rights and Cowboy Bebop elbows. Quick tag to Jock, who nails the masked man with a running BUTT thump! COACH Hey, Cole. COLE Yeah? COACH BITE MY SHINY METAL ASS!! COLE ONE.. TWO… Huckleberry flies into view and breaks up the pin. As the referee escorts him back to his corner, Jock lassos X as Baron clotheslines him off the ropes! COLE Lone Star Lasso! You can put this one in the books. It’s all over. The count has to wait until Baron exits. Referee Nick Patrick calling it by the book, but it allows Huckleberry to sneak in and drop an elbow on Mulligan! He rolls X on top and exits! COACH You were saying, Mikey? Ha! ONE… TWO… THREE-- NO!! “YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Despite protests of a slow count, Mr. X and Dennis Huckleberry go on with the task at hand. Now the legal man, Huck slams Jock and climbs onto the middle rope, spiking his fist into the canvas as Jock rolls away and tags Baron! COLE Nobody home. Baron drops Huckleberry with a top rope lariat, then follows it up with a big boot to X. Huck’s sent for the ride and scooped up, only to be thrown overhead and onto his partner with the DEVIL’S ADDITION! With the dreaded Mr. X out of the picture, the Gunslingers perform the REDNECK HANGOVER on Huckleberry! ONE… TWO… THREE! * DINGDINGDING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of the match… THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGEERRRRRSSSS!! “YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” The guys high-five and receive a warm hug from Melody, who proceeds to raise their hands in victory as we go to… The OAOAST Event Tracker is Brought To You By Gillette-The Best a Man Can Get December 6 - Tacoma, WA December 13 - San Fransisco, CA December 20 - Fresno, CA December 27 - Phoenix, AZ

Meanwhiles, back in the office of AngleSault, Maggie Nerdly is shooting the breeze with the boss. With AS looking utterly bemused by Maggie's fresh, hip lingo, he tries to look like he's taking it all in all the same. "Oi!" The thick cockney voice of Nathaniel Black interrupts the boss mid-conversation, which would be a relief were it not for the fact it's Nathaniel Black interrupting. ANGLESAULT I'll talk to you later Maggie. Maggie quickly leaves, as AS turns and glares at Black. ANGLESAULT What the hell's the meaning of this? BLACK I might well ask yeh the same thing. Sixty days. Sixty. Bloody. Days, I've been sittin' on my arse unable to wrestle 'cause of you an' this 'suspension' you gave me. I get 'ere tonight an' they barely even let me in the pissing building, let alone in 'ere. Enough is enough. All I did was punt a ball in someone's gob, anyone'd think I assaulted a fan or some'it. ANGLESAULT You ruined a special attraction on live Pay Per View, for which we bought in a special guest... flew in a special guest no less. Do you realise the negative publicity we recieved? Or how much we would have ended up paying out had Kasey been caught up in your little ambush? Nevermind the fact you've put one of our most exciting talents out of the business indefinately! BLACK Oh, you go to any circus in America an' you'll find another one of 'is ilk. ANGLESAULT You can't go around attacking and injuring people just because you disagree with their style of wrestling! We're a global company. If you want to survive here, you're going to have to learn to adapt. You're not in Japan anymore. BLACK An' don't I bloody well know it! AS scowls. BLACK Listen, all I want is a match tonight, a'ight? I've got sixty days of frustration to take out on someone. Don't give a toss who it is. Just gimme a fight. ANGLESAULT Well, you've served your suspension. BLACK Yep. ANGLESAULT Tell you what, your newfound buddies Faqu and Blonde made their demands to me too earlier this week. I don't know how you guys did things in HI-YAH, but all these demands and insistances aren't the way I like to do business. Just so you now. But, seeing as I'm trying to fair, let's be fair. Faqu and Blonde wanted The Christ Air Express again... but, how about we make it you, Faqu and Blonde, seeing as you're all so comfortable doing your dirty work as a trio... you three, taking on Christ Air and a partner of their choosing. How does that sound? BLACK Magic. Just magic. Black marches back out of the office, leaving AngleSault sighing at the people he has to deal with day to day. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sunday Novemeber 25th The home of Krista Isadora Duncan Los Angeles, CA We're brought into the mansion of Krista Isadora Duncan, beautifully decorated with chic entertainment memrobilla, ridiculously expensive sculpture, and Jade and D*LUX...huh? Yes, that's right Jade Rodez and the D*LUX boys have woven themselves into the high society digs of Chateau Krista. But they aren't some sort of slave labor assigned to function as human statues for the entertainment of those richer then them. Actually, they're currently dusting and tidying up her dining room, and trying incredibly hard not to break anything that costs over two thousand dollars. Exhausted from all the cleaning, Jade takes a break from polishing the chandelier JADE Alright, I have to get Maya from ballet, but you can handle it here right? I'm really glad we're doing this cleaning, guys. This house is so big we could be collecting social security by the time we're done with the first floor but, I think that Krista...I think that she could use this. I have to admit this was a great idea you two. SHAYNE (from underneath the center table) You should let us think for ourselves more often. JADE You thought to clean a house, you didn't discover life on Mars, let's not go overboard. Tyler steps down from the step stool he's been using to clean a china cabniet. TYLER I think after we're done in here, me and Shayne are gonna go mop the kitchen area, probably dust off the exercise equipment in the gym, then vacuum the home theater, and then..uh...get into the bedroom for an underwearinspection. JADE What? Can you two be more subtle with your perversions? SHAYNE I don't think so. TERRY TAYLOR (off screen) Uh, Krista! Uh, Krista! Face soured by a “Oh, what now expression”, Jade departs the dining room in a huff. Venturing through eclectic décor of the hallway area, she enters one of the mansion's many unused rooms to attend to Terry's mysterious fright. The room looks fairly nondescript, being minus the many chic adornments that give character to the rest of the dwelling. Its wood floors are neatly polished and unblemished, perhaps due its utter lack of traffic. JADE Krista's on the phone, Terry. What's wrong? Face as pale as a ghost, Terry can barely get any words out his mouth as his trembling hand leads Jade's gaze up to a most distressing sight. Proudly protruding from the center wall is what can most accurately be described as a shrine to Alix Maria Spezia. Shrouding a mammoth bulletin board and highlighted by several soft spot lights are literally hundreds of pictures of Alix, some candid shots, some taken from various red carpets, others are pin-up pictures, and even more are images of her and Krista in happier times. Perhaps more unusual is the life size cardboard standup of Alix, outfitted in a Santa's little helper uniform and holding a box of Miss Spezia's Sweeties candy canes. JADE Oh wow! TAYLOR This..this..this shrine. What should I do with this shrine? Rather then say “burn it quickly”, Jade decides to call for her friend and mentor. JADE Krista! Krista, we have a problem! KRISTA (O.S.) Damn it, Terry, just because you lie in there naked doesn't make it a spa! Its my garage! JADE Krista, please come quick! KRISTA (O.S.) There better be a fire, and several very hot firewomen. Hair pulled into a ponytail and outfitted in black workout pants and a white Blondie t-shirt, Krista strolls into the room. She instantly notices the worried gazes Terry and Jade pass towards her shrine, and awkwardly tries to gloss over the embarrassment. KRISTA Paging change of subject, paging change of subject. Please answer on the white courtesy phone. JADE Krista, this is a shrine. An obsessive, borderline psychotic, possible evidence in a murder trial, shrine! KRISTA That's no big deal, really. Its nothing. JADE Terry, throw it away. KRISTA Huh? No! Krista dives for the lifesize cutout, seemingly willing to protect it until her last drop of blood has been spilt. Not so willing to spill blood, but willing to at least battle over the unhealthy creation, Jade engages in a tug of war battle with Krista. Despite the fact that she's a four time tag team champion, Krista can't quite pry her treasure away from Jade, who so desperately wants to bid the object fairwell. KRISTA Wait, wait, wait! Just let me keep this! Please! I worked really hard to get it, I had to break into a Rite-Aid in the middle of the night, and one of the school children I ran over on the escape is still in stable but critical condition. (Krista calms her voice into a low sorrowful tone) You can torch the shrine, sell it to TMZ, use it to up my date in the celeb death pool, whatever. Just let me keep this, okay? Though she'd prefer any remnants of Alix leave the house, Jade gives into Krista's compromise. JADE Fine. Okay. Terry, get a box and take all that down. Terry grabs the nearest box he can see. KRISTA Wait, not that box! Terry accidentally removes a “marital aid” from the crate, which Krista angrily snatches from him. JADE (sighing and putting her arms on Krista's shoulders) You're in a bit of a pickle, and we've got to get you back to a place called home. KRISTA I'm holding a six inch anal plug named Kong the ANALhilator. I'm about a four day drive and a boat ride away from a place called home. JADE I know it hurts, Krista, but we've got to start the process of getting over Alix. Okay? Already aware of that painful truth, Krista frowns and nods slowly. TERRY I have an idea! Maybe, you should take a vacation! KRISTA Hey,who told you you could make eye contact? TERRY (lowering his head to avoid Krista's gaze) I have an idea! Maybe you should take a vacation! Not able to be away from Krista for more then three minutes, D*LUX burst into the room to offer their “helpful” suggestions. SHAYNE Why don't you go to the Virgin Islands? KRISTA That's a great idea! JADE Its not an island full of virgins. KRISTA That's a shitty idea! TYLER Why not some place exotic? Like the historic deserts of Egypt! KRISTA No thanks. If I'm gonna get more sand up my ass then the entire country of Libya, I'd rather it be because I'm naked on the beach making love with Kate Beckinsale. JADE We're trying to get her to heal emotionally, we're not trying kick her off the continent. Isn't there an underwear inspection you need to be conducting? KRISTA Huh?! JADE Back to what we're talking about, you have a certain...I don't know what to call it. Just to say you can attract girls, I guess that's an oversimplification on what it really is. You've got a certain rare quality, maybe its an aura, just the way you carry yourself wows people. If you opened your door you'd probably have a line of women stretching all the way to China waiting for you. TYLER (very loudly, as though he were expecting someone) Who could that be? TERRY Who could who be? DING DING DONG! KRISTA (looking outside the room towards the front door) Oh goodie what OAOAST midcarder who's half my age could be at the door to offer me unsolicited romantic advice? Cuban Wall? Vinny Santana? Or maybe its James Blonde! Wouldn't that be vomit worthy? Grumbling to herself, Krista leaves the room and heads towards the door. Against her desires to scream “Get lost!” she opens the white painted door and finds a delivery woman in brown shorts and brown shirt with a bouquet of flowers standing in front of her. The flower bearing girl is beyond gorgeous, with flawless tanned skin, vibrant blue eyes, soft Scandinavian facial features, perfectly glossed red lips, and short closely cropped blonde hair that hangs a strand across her forehead and reaches no farther then past her upper neck. WOMAN (taken aback by Krista's beauty) You're Krista Isadora Duncan? KRISTA Its taken seventeen years of psychotherapy to figure it out. But, yes, yes I am. WOMAN (handing Krista a clipboard.) Congrats on your sound bill of mental health! I need you to sign this. KRISTA (signing the clipboard) Who are these flowers from? WOMAN (staring with distinct attraction at Krista) Maybe you have a secret admirer? KRISTA Note to self: add can of mace and tranquilizer darts to grocery list. WOMAN (leaning closer to Krista, to the point where she can bathe in her sweet cherry scented perfume) Is that good for you? KRISTA Well, I'd prefer flame throwers but they don't make any models that match my eye shadow...oh, you meant the signature? Yeah, uh, its good.... Eager to spend a higher quality of time with the celeb superstar, the woman hastily scrambles for conversation. WOMAN Don't you want to put them in water? With a sweet smile, Krista nods enthusiastically. Beating the thick roses against her leg, she peers through the hallway, certain that there are no vases within reach. The delivery woman trails softly behind her, unable and unwilling to pull her eyes away from Krista's traffic stopping body. Krista is one hundred percent sure that there are no vases laying in the hallway, and turns to inform the delivery girl of that fact. She catches the woman undressing her with her eyes, and can't help but blush in the face of admiration. KRISTA I don't really think we have a vase. My friends are over trying to help clean this place so I hid anything that's worth enough to fund a small Nigerian militia. WOMAN (looking upstairs, but thinking of the bedroom) Maybe, there's something upstairs? Guest room? Office? I'm sure you must have flowers in your bedroom, you can just add these right in! There's a hint of hesitation on Krista's part when she's forced to follow the woman's yearning eyes up the stairs. But within seconds it looks to dissipate, and with a small smile Krista nods her agreement, and motions the woman upstairs. The scene returns to the “shrine room”, where Jade's vile stare is yanking beads of sweat off the bodies of Shayne and Tyler. JADE What did YOU TWO do? TYLER You said she needed to start getting over Alix. We just helped speed process along, that's it! JADE I just said that two minutes ago, you must've ordered the hooker two days ago. SHAYNE We didn't order a hooker! We ordered flowers from Fat Floyd's Floristry and Flapjacks. We couldn't have known they'd be delivered by Freaking Horny Francesca. TAYLOR She must have some kind of superpower. I've never seen a girl have that kind of effect on other girls. If I had her kind of power, I'd be getting it on at least once a decade! JADE (ignoring Terry) Alright, well, I think now is a good time for a lunch break. SHAYNE Its ten in the morning. JADE I said time for a lunch break. Besides, I still have to get Maya from ballet. Not quite able to combat the finality of Jade's voice, D*LUX and Terry are forced out of the room, and eventually right out the front door. OAOAST HeldDOWN~! RIDE ‘EM COWBOY Lone Star Gunslingers in action NEXT!

The camera cuts to the backstage area where Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are at. The crowd cheers loudly. Heat and PRL high five each other. THA PUERTO RICAN Hey man, thanks so much for coming out there to help me. It really means alot to me. COLOMBIAN HEAT Hey, no problem, dawg. Think of it as me returning tha favour for you not hittin' me with a Conchairto two weeks ago. PRL That really left an impression on you, didn't it? HEAT Yeah, dude. It showed me dat there was still some good left in ya. I know betta than anybody in tha OAOAST when you're keepin' it real, and when you're not. And PR, you is keepin' it real now! I can see dat. Youse is tha dude dat I used to chill wit back in tha day. Glad to see dat he has returned. Hopefully for good! THA PUERTO RICAN Well, I'm not the same guy that I used to be, even a few months ago. I've changed. HEAT For tha betta. PRL Heh. If you say so. So, where do we go from here? You know we haven't been this close in about three years. HEAT Bro, tha past is tha past. Let bygones be bygones, yah'mean? We is off to a new start now. And we is gonna kick dat nerdy white boy's candy ass till he can't take it no mo'! PRL I feel ya, I feel ya. We got a big challenge ahead of us. Stephen Joseph ain't gonna take this lying down. I should know. He was my manager for three years. And now he's got MY Lightning Crew backing him up! It ain't gonna be easy. HEAT No matter. In this war, I've got yo back, son! And wit me by your side, ain't nothin' gonna stop us. We're tha bad boys of tha OAOAST! We play hard, we work hard, and we party hard! HA HA! PRL Bad Boys. Bad Boys. Hey, I like it! The Bad Boys. That's a good name for us! The Bad Boys. HEAT More like Badd Boyz wit a 'Z'. Trademark dat shit, homie. PRL We are The Badd Boyz of the OAOAST! If Stephen Joseph Popick and my 'friends' want some, then they can come get some, because The Badd Boyz won't back down from ANYBODY! HEAT Yeah! Yeah! We ride togetha. We die togetha. We're Badd Boyz for life! And Popick, get ready, cuz Tha Badd Boyz are comin' to get'cha! Word! PRL Fresh! HEAT Solid! PRL and Colombian Heat high five each other again. They then hug. Heat and PRL continue talking, both men in a good mood. The crowd cheers. The camera cuts to The Lightning Crew dressing room where The Lightning Crew and Stephen Joseph Popick are assembled. The crowd boos loudly. Every member of The LC is talking loudly, all at the same time. Everyone in the room is in a very bad mood. The male members of The LC are still holding body parts in pain. Princess Stacey is checking on Vitamin X, while Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez-Popick massages her new husband's shoulders. The camera zooms in on Stephen Joseph, himself in the center of all the commotion. STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK Okay! Hey! Hey! HEY! The talking stops. Everyone looks at Popick. POPICK Now everybody, PLEASE calm the hell down! VITAMIN X You saw what they did to us out there! And there were only two of them! TWO! The talking resumes. POPICK Wait. Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! WAIT! WAIT! QUIET! RELAX! RE-LAX! I have everything under control. CUBAN WALL How so, boss? We were just embarrassed by Colombian Freakin' Heat out there! POPICK Wall, we did not plan to get rid of Tha Puerto Rican for three months to let it all go to waste in one night! You agreed to join up with me because you believed that I could take you places PRL could never take you. And you would be right. But first, there's still the matter at hand. Namely, the fact that Tha Puerto Rican is still able to use his own two feet to walk. CUBAN WALL Let's go back out there and kick his ass! VITAMIN X YEAH-UH~! THE BONE THUG ARRIBA LA RAZA~! MR. BORICUA GRRRRRRRRRRR! POPICK NO! We will NOT do that! Not tonight at least! No, getting rid of Tha Puerto Rican is going to be a little bit more difficult now now that he has some backup. Still, I believe in my heart that I have the answer to our little PRL problem, Lightning Crew. Lindsay, be a dear and hand me my cellphone please? Lindsay goes into Popick's black bag and pulls out a cellphone which she hands over to Popick. POPICK Thank you, sweetie. SJP dials a number. The phone rings. POPICK I just hope he's home now. Hi! Yeah it's me. No, don't hang up! I have a proposition for you! How would you like to rid the One And Only AngleSault Thread of Tha Puerto Rican...forever? Yes, I mean it this time. No, there's no catch. I know it's something you've been wanting to do since 2003. Well, nows your chance to do it! No, this is not a prank phone call! I'm serious! I hate Tha Puerto Rican too, you know. Since September all right!? God, do you ALWAYS have to be SO difficult? So, you'll do it? Come on. Come on! COME ON! COME...ON! COME ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! Excellent! Glad to have you on board! I'll fly over to your house tomorrow so that we can discuss all the details. And I'll assume that you'll show up on HeldDOWN~! next week? It's been a while. The fans would love to see you again, trust me. Good. HeldDOWN~! next week then! All right. I can't wait! See you tomorrow. Later, dude. Peace. Bye. Popick hangs up the phone. VITAMIN X Who was that? POPICK Let's just say it's someone who knows PRL rather well. And let's just say that it's the one person who I KNOW has Tha Puerto Rican's number! THOMAS RODRIGUEZ I like the sound of that! POPICK You should, Thomas. You should. Gentlemen...and ladies, this is the dawning of a whole new era here in the One And Only AngleSault Thread. An era in which fair and just rules over crooked and unjust. An era in which the ruling class rules with an iron FIST. And an era in which any and all traces of Tha Puerto Rican are removed...PERMANTELY! He is no longer MY CORPORATE Champion. He is just a Corporate CHUMP. And his 'buddy' Colombian Heat is just a Grade-A CHUMP! I now control the one thing that he THOUGHT he could control. And in my hands lies the one thing that he wants more than anything in the world. Popick stares at the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt. He grins maniacally. POPICK But it will remain mine. Oh yes. It will remain MINE ALL MINE! And together, as one united unit, we are going to CRUSH Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat! Crush them into dirt! Crush them into nothingness! We shall have our vengeance for tonight's travesty. And it will happen soon. REAL REAL soon. I guarantee it. The Lightning Crew are all smiles now. They all nod their heads and laughs maniacally. CUBAN WALL Yeah! Yeah! VITAMIN X BOO-YAH~! THOMAS RODRIGUEZ HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ-POPICK He's going down! PRINCESS STACEY They're BOTH going down! THE BONE THUG Él está muerto para mí! MR. BORICUA GRRRRRRRRRRR! The Lightning Crew continue gloating over Popick's acquisition. The camera does another close-up shot of Stephen Joseph Popick staring directly into the gold plate in the center of the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt. He touches the nameplate which has his name on it. He has a psychotic grin on his face. Cut to Sofa Central with Michael Cole and Jonathan "Da Coach" Coachman. COLE Who could Popick have been talking to just now? COACH I think I have an idea, but I don't want to say anything just yet. COLE Well, whoever it was, Popick seemed mighty confident that this person, whoever he or she may be, is the perfect weapon in his fight against Tha Puerto Rican! And it looks like it WILL be a fight! Tha Puerto Rican will NOT go quietly into the night. He's got some backup in the form of Colombian Heat, The Badd Boyz as they call themselves. COACH Just a lame attempt to sell some T-shirts. Lame. COLE Whatever the motive, they're here and they're ready to battle all EIGHT members of The Lightning Crew now led by Stephen Joseph Popick, believe it or not! COACH It's about time that they got some new leadership. PRL had been slipping these past few months. COLE How so? COACH By concentrating more on his World Title ambitions then on The Lightning Crew's needs! COLE Yet you sure supported him in his World Title endeavors! COACH That's because I felt he needed it, doofus! Do I have to explain EVERYTHING to you? COLE You are really something else, you know that? REALLY something else! COACH Thank you! COLE Yeah. Anyway, fans, it looks like we've got another tag team here in the OAOAST. We've got The Love Doctors, The Lonestar Gunslingers, The Heavenly Rockers, The Christ Air Express, The South Central Militia, and now The Badd Boyz! And speaking of tag teams in the One And Only AngleSault Thread, it's time now for some more exciting tag team action as Los Conquistadors take on Rescue 911 in a couple of moments! Let's go down to the ring to Michael Buffer for the introductions. Soy un perdedor I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me? Soy un perdedor I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me? Gold lights flash on and off around the entrance way as Beck's 90's classic, Loser seeps through the arena. As the entrance doors part, the biggest losers in OAOAST history, Los Conquistadors strut from the backstage area. Though they may be inclined to perform some entry way theatrics, they're hurried down the ramp by pushy production assistants, who say there's not enough time for an entrance that lasts longer then ten seconds! And when they see Los Conquistadors walking down the ramp, they furiously order them to RUN so as not to take away time from the important wrestlers. COACH Hahah! Even the zit faced interns clown on these suckas! Soy un perdedor I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me? Soy un perdedor I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me? BUFFER The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall with.. WE INTERRUPT THIS PROGRAM FOR A VERY SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT Los Conquistadors are well past the state of disbelief that their entrance has been cut off to display a clip of a twelve year old smacking himself in the nuts. But the more pressing issue becomes that not a soul in the arena seems to care about their highly humiliating plight. They're left to only preach to the choir, complaining about a company that has deemed then less important then a teenager's testicles. COACH If Los Conquistadors ever became trapped in quicksand, not only would Lassie not run for help, but she'd whack them a few times with a severed branch to make sure he sunk properly. Dudes is lame. COLE Yes, well, the last time Los Conquistadors were allowed on HeldDOWN they lost to Holly-Wood and Melody Nerdly. Since then they've been banished to our Syndicated programing where they've been handed losses from everyone from the Christ Air Express, The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew, and James Riggs by himself. Now here is there chance to make good with a worldwide audience. Through the loud speakers emerges the somber piano keys of Cold War Kids' Hospital Beds. Hard pounding drum beats join it, melded with equally distressed vocals. Tell me the story of how you ended up here I've heard it all in the hospital Nurses are fussin' Doctors on tour Somewhere in India I got one friend layin' across from me I did not choose him, he did not choose me We've got no chance of recovering Sharing hospital Joy and misery Joy and misery Joy and misery The proud owners of this STUPENDOUS entrance music, Rescue 911 step through the entrance doors to a small round of polite applause. Outfitted in black trunks and red boots, and elbow pads, EMT Tim nods to the audience before heading towards the ring. His partner stares from behind thick rimmed sunglasses, clad in a pink and white Hawaiian t-shirt, and khaki pants. He then pumps his fist and joins his partner in the trip to the ring. BUFFER The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall with a televised time limit of fifteen minutes...now making their way to the ring representing the OAOAST First Responders Unit, introducing first from New York City Detective Bosley, and his partner from Peoria, Illinois, EMT Tim Cash, together they are RESCUE-NINE-ONE-ONE! The poor men in gold find themselves treated with even greater disrespect, when they see that the production assistants not only don't rush them down the ramp as if they were Olympic sprinters, but they also offer them complimentary drink service! COLE Gotta love Rescue 911! Two guys who always do things the right way and the honest way. It seems like we could use a few more of their type on the roster. Eh, Coach? COACH Yeah, if we want to go out of business in six months. DING DING Cash begins the match squaring off against Uno. Having no desire to play by any sort of rules, Uno attempts to draw first blood through the use of a kick to the balls! Thankfully, the EMT catches the boot before it collides with his testicles. He gives the Conquistadors a stern warning about the low blow, which provides Dos with the distraction needed to sneak into the ring, and neckrbeaker him to the canvas! COLE Foul play! Bosley shares simillar and more vulgar sentiments, as he leans through the ropes, trying to get at the golden twins. He's held off by referee Billy Silverman, which allows the Mexican duo to double team Cash with a pair of elbow drops. Right after their strike connects, Dos scampers out of the ring, leaving Uno to make a clean pin... ONE TWO Cash kicks out of the pinfall, drawing a small cheer from the sold out audience. He leaps to his feet under his own power and begins trading strikes with the winless grappler. Understanding that he has zero chance of besting the EMT in a brawl, Uno cheats once again and eye rakes Cash. With his opponent blinded for the moment, Uno is free to retreat to his corner and bring Dos into the affair. Making his first legal appearance into the match, Dos upends the Perioa native with a running cross body block. However, any possibilities of a pin are snuffed out when Cash reverses it into a pinfall of his own... ONE TWO But, Dos kicks out! He's not out of the woods yet, though, as Cash drags him into his corner and applies the tag with Detective Bosley. Together they trap Dos into a double front facelock and raise him into the skies for a vertical suplex! But the eternal jobber manages to slip free of their grasp, landing behind them on the ring apron. Stunned, Cash is powerless to stop Dos from slamming his face into the turnbuckles. With Cash incapacitated, Dos succeeds in overtaking Bosley with a sunset flip! ONE TWO But, Pigley kicks out, and does not look entirely pleased with Dos' antics. But before he gets a chance to prove just how angry he truly is, Dos takes him off his feet with a leg sweep! As Bosley quickly rises to deal with these annoying combatants, Dos has already applied the tag to Uno. Joining their hands, they manage to surge at the New Yorker with a double lariat. But he ducks beneath their arms, and runs the ropes, returning with his mind set on a lariat of his own! But the Mexicans move a hair too quick for him and floor him with a double dropkick! COLE Wow Los Conquistadors aren't looking so bad right now! COACH Give it time. Give it time. After exchanging a high five, Dos leaves the ring. Uno is left to pepper Bosley with stomps, but after the third one becomes distracted by Cash's presence on the ring ropes. Moving with amazing speed, he launches his elbow into Cash's forehead, blasting him from the apron. As a couple fans boo the cheap shot, Dos returns to bulldoze the Detective with a running forearm smash. But Bosley is waiting for his arrival and drags him down to the canvas with an armbar takedown! However the super-agile luchadore quickly kips out of the submission hold, and runs to make a tag with his partner. COLE Lots and lots of tags from Los Conquistadors. Maybe this is their new strategy! Rather then enter the ring, Dos speedily ventures atop the turnbuckle, and flies off with a spinning wheel kick! But Bosley ducks bellow the descending missile, leaving the poor luchadore to crash and burn into the canvas! COACH I told you to give it time. And here it is. Clutching his wounded back, Dos valiantly battles to his feet. But all his achievements end there, as Bosley drives him downwards with a Serving Hard Time (Bossman Slam)! Bosley reaches forward and hooks the leg for the crucial pinfall... ONE TWO BROKEN UP BY UNO! Uno begins hammering Bosley with punches, even as the officer of the law begins to stand. Though he's more then capable of handling Dos by himself, Bosley is given some helpful assistance by his partner who nails him with punches of his own. Unable to resist the dual police brutality, Uno is reduced into a whimpering wreck. That's just perfect for Detective Bosley who hits him with his NYPD-DT (Suplex into a DDT)! As Cash leans against the ropes, celebrating the upcoming victory, the referee counts the pinfall.. ONE! TWO! THREE! Bosley immediately dismounts Dos and gives his partner a warm hug for their accomplishment. BUFFER The winners of this match as a result of pinfall...RESCUE 911 COLE Not a bad showing for Rescue 911! After spending most of 2007 on the losing end, Rescue 911 is closing out the year very strongly, riding a six match winning streak. And with the Anderson Cup starting in January, you have to wonder if they can carry that momentum over into such an important tournament. COACH Rescue 911 beats little kids from OAOVW, and Los Conquistadors for their wins. That tournament will probably feature the likes of The Beverly Hills Blonds, Team Heyross, The Christ Air Express. So, you're answer is a big fat no. Who even knows if Rescue 911 will be allowed into the tournament? Your One and Only New Year's Celebration January 3, 2008-Monterrey, Mexico

Cool opening with the agent passes. The various segments throughout the show featuring SJ and PR made the ME seem ever more important IMO. CW vs. Dr. Steven: Fun little match. Suitable last minute replacement. Denzel vs. Reject: Good effort from Spencer, but it wasn’t enough to dethrone Reject. Ominous message before the next match. Interested to see where that goes. Team Sandman vs. Team Alfdogg: You can never go wrong with a traditional Survivor Series match, especially when the characters are good as those involved in this one. Excellent stuff here. at David Arquette. Pro wrestling has been filled with Wrestlecrap throughout its history, but WCW Champion David Arquette ranks in the top 3 if not the top spot. Triple Decker Cage ME: Two words -- bad ass. Words cannot do it justice. MOTN: Just to be different, Team Sandman vs. Team Alfdogg. That’s certainly no knock on the ME. Quote of the Show: “So, you see Mister Wright, its not as if I plan to slap a rainbow sticker on the Jag, crank up the Village People, and parade down South Beach in assless chaps with a boyfriend half my age who's only knowledge of English are the words “Yes, harder and faster”. Far from it. Alix and Mackenzie, as lesbians, are an abomination against church, country, and man himself. For that they have guaranteed themselves an eternity in the fag infested flames of hell. But, while they're here on earth, what do ya say we make a few bucks off 'em?” -- Theodore Moneymaker

"Thriller" by Fall Out Boy is cued and the horn dogs in attendance go wild as Melody Nerdly bounces out on stage and fires her imaginary pistols, triggering a blast of pyro from under the stage and the emergence of Jock Mulligan and Baron Windels. COLE Earlier today we caught up with the Lone Star Gunslingers, so let’s hear from them right now. [color="#FF8C00"][b]* SWOOSH *[/b][/color] [i]A small box settles in at the left hand corner of the screen, as Melody and the Gunslingers appear in front of their CG backdrop -- a snorting bull whose residue spells the team’s name. [/i] MELODY :D JOCK Howdy. The Lone Star Gunslingers here with a message to all our fans and the Heavenly Rockers. Synth, Logan, you got off mighty easily at November Reign. You see, Baron and I vowed when the dust settled justice would be served, but snakes like yourselves have a funny way of eluding justice. You can run but you can’t hide. BARON As far as we’re concerned, Heavenly Rockers, you can go off and do your own thing. After all you are the World tag team champions, meaning you have the right to sit on those tag titles for as long as you want. But you will have to defend them eventually and against us. When that time comes you can bet your bottom dollar we’ll be ready. [color="#FF8C00"][b]* SWOOSH *[/b][/color] BUFFER The following tag team contest, one fall with a 15 minute time limit. Introducing first, already in the ring, from parts unknown, the dreaded Mr. X! His tag team partner, from Mobile, Alabama, 277 pound, Dennis Huckleberry! “BOO!” Mr. X is your typical old school masked -- and overweight -- jobber. Likewise for his partner. They antagonized the crowd while the Gunslingers make their way to the ring. BUFFER Their opponents, accompanied by everybody’s favorite gal pal MELODY NERDLY...from San Antonio, Texas, total combine weight 497 pounds, Baron Windels and the "Texas Twister" Jock Mulligan... THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGEERRRRRSSSS!! Heavy underdogs, the masked Mr. X and Dennis Huckleberry jump Jock and Baron the very second they step through the ropes. MELODY :o COACH I reckon, in the orders of the Gunslingers, this isn’t quite how they planned on starting the match, Cole. COLE Most certainly not, but they’re going up against two men looking to make a name for themselves. We’re approaching the wintertime, but the competition in the OAOAST is hot and heavy. * DINGDINGDING * Irish whip, but the Gunslingers leapfrog X and Huckleberry on the rebound and level them with a pair of dropkicks. The TX Twister whips X into the ropes and catches him with a lariat. The cover! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! A tag is made, and as Melody fires her imaginary pistols outside, Baron fires off a couple of live rounds inside, staggering Mr. X with big time rights and Cowboy Bebop elbows. Quick tag to Jock, who nails the masked man with a running BUTT thump! COACH Hey, Cole. COLE Yeah? COACH BITE MY SHINY METAL ASS!! COLE :rolleyes: ONE.. TWO… Huckleberry flies into view and breaks up the pin. As the referee escorts him back to his corner, Jock lassos X as Baron clotheslines him off the ropes! COLE Lone Star Lasso! You can put this one in the books. It’s all over. The count has to wait until Baron exits. Referee Nick Patrick calling it by the book, but it allows Huckleberry to sneak in and drop an elbow on Mulligan! He rolls X on top and exits! COACH You were saying, Mikey? Ha! ONE… TWO… THREE-- NO!! “YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Despite protests of a slow count, Mr. X and Dennis Huckleberry go on with the task at hand. Now the legal man, Huck slams Jock and climbs onto the middle rope, spiking his fist into the canvas as Jock rolls away and tags Baron! COLE Nobody home. Baron drops Huckleberry with a top rope lariat, then follows it up with a big boot to X. Huck’s sent for the ride and scooped up, only to be thrown overhead and onto his partner with the DEVIL’S ADDITION! With the dreaded Mr. X out of the picture, the Gunslingers perform the REDNECK HANGOVER on Huckleberry! ONE… TWO… THREE! * DINGDINGDING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of the match… THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGEERRRRRSSSS!! “YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” The guys high-five and receive a warm hug from Melody, who proceeds to raise their hands in victory as we go to…

Abrupt ending, but I spent my Thanksgiving weekend playing Firo Pro Wrestling Returns and the match suffered because of it. Well, the ending really. [i][size=4][color="#FF0000"][b]HEY WAIT I GOT A NEW COMPLAINT![/b][/color][/size][/i] “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” SYNTH [img=http://www.websmileys.com/sm/angels/angel2.gif] LOGAN [img=http://www.websmileys.com/sm/angels/angelwings.gif] SIMON :p NED :D BUFFER The following is an 8-man elimination contest! Introducing first, team co-captains LOGAN USHER MANN and “THE HANDSOME HUSTLER” NED BLANCHARD! COLONEL ABDULLAH ABIR NERDLY presents the greatest rock ‘n’ wrestling band of AAAAALLLL-time, THE HEAVENLYYYYYYY ROCKERS, featuring THE BEVERLY HILLS BLONDS. Collectively…THE ENTERTAINERS! Theme music: Trust Company, "Rock The Casbah" "Rock The Casbah" by Trust Company cues up and Leon Rodez struts out onstage with the rest of his squadron. Jade and Melody chat amongst themselves as their charges go around slapping hands, and collecting phone numbers in the case of Leon and Tyler! The Gunslingers, however, choose to focus their attention on the Heavenly Rockers, eying them all the way. Baron through a protective mask design to guard his nose from any further damage. BUFFER Their opponents, being accompanied by JADE RODEZ and MELODY NERDLY! First, two-thirds of the World 6-man tag team champions... "TREMENDOUS" TYLER BRYANT and team captain "SILKY SMOOTH" LEON RODEZ! And their partners, from San Antonio, Texas… “THE TEXAS TWISTER” JOCK MULLIGAN and BARON WINDELS… THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGERS! THE KINGS OF LLLEEEEEEOOOOONN!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" COLE You can see the hatred in the Lone Star Gunslingers’ eyes. They badly want to repay the Heavenly Rockers for what they did to them and Melody. COACH Didn’t anybody ever tell Jock and Baron it’s not good to hold grudges? They were getting too big for their britches and the Heavenly Rockers put them in their place. COLE Revisionist history at its finest. But one has to wonder how much effect that protective guard will have on Baron. The Gunslingers rush the ring with vengeance in mind, but the Entertainers high-tail it as Rodez and Bryant join their partners inside. To save face the Entertainers huddle together for a last-minute “strategy session“. Little do they realize OAOAST cameras pick up Ned telling everyone to “stay here so they think we know what we’re doing.” LOGAN :rolleyes: Logan proves why he’s the real captain of the team, ordering Synth to jump Jock from behind as the Kings of Leon casually remove their pre-match garb in the corner. With Leon and Tyler flirting with the female ring attendant and the Gunslingers conversing with Melody and Jade, Synth is able to blindside the Texas Twister and drag him out towards the center of the ring away from his corner. * DINGDINGDING * COLE With no regard for human life, perhaps due to being stoned out of his mind, Synth walked into the lion’s den and left unscathed! COACH Synth is fearless, Cole. How many people do you know can say they’ve died 3 times? COLE It certainly explains his erratic behavior at times. The Synthmeister pummels Jock to his knees, and then rakes the laces of the boots across the eyes, momentarily blinding the proud Texan. Sent in for the ride Jock manages to put on the brakes and kick Synth in the shoulder, followed by a round of Cowboy Bebop (bionic) elbows that stagger his foe. Jock gives Synth a taste of his own medicine, firing him off to the ropes, and connects with a diving lariat! ONE… KICKOUT! Baron receives the tag and the fans voice their approval. The statuesque Gunslinger delivers a clubbing overhand right onto the outstretched arm of Synth from the top, then wrings the arm, but Synth answers with a knee to the midsection and an uppercut from way downtown. Logan immediately asks for the tag as Baron struggles to remain on his feet after that shot from Synth. Logan climbs the stairway to heaven, figuratively speaking, and spreads his “wings” before flying…but Baron catches him coming off the top with a shot to the gut! COACH He was playing possum, Cole. COLE Logan took a chance and it didn’t pay off. Baron smashes Logan’s face in the turnbuckle and hammers away from the middle rope. 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 7... 8... 9... 10! Whipped into the ropes, Logan ducks a big boot and tags Ned, much to the fans chagrin. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!“ COLE The fans aren’t happy to see that. They were looking forward to Logan getting his. COACH He’s doing them a favor, Cole. Baron’s lucky he caught Logan being overanxious or it’d have been a whole different story. “YYEEEAAAHHHHH!” Team captain Leon Rodez receives a rousing ovation as he enters for the first time. Blanchard is none too impressed, talking smack to Rodez who just stands there with his arms folded chewing a piece of gum. “Are you even listening to me?” Ned barks. In typical Leon Rodez fashion, the Silky Smooth One responds lightheartedly, blowing a bubble in Blanchard‘s face. But the Handsome Hustler is less than amused and pops Rodez with a stinging right hand! COACH That sure burst his bubble, huh? Ha! Leon fights back, trading blows with Ned. Just when it seems Rodez is about to gain control Blanchard comes back with a fury. The Grand Rapids Golden Child ducks a back elbow and levels Ned with THE SHACK ATTACK! ONE… KICKOUT! Rodez charges in after whipping Ned to the corner and drives both knees into the sternum, then plants the Handsome Hustler mid-ring with an EXPLODER SUPLEX! ONE… TWO… THR-- NO! Leon moves as Simon accidentally drops an elbow on his tag partner! Then Rodez brings the Blonds together for a DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER! Quick tag to “Tremendous” Tyler Bryant, who Rodez assists in the ROCKET LAUNCHER CLOTHESLINE! COLE How about that? Larger Than Life Line as performed by Leon Rodez and Tyler Bryant! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Ned quickly rolls away towards his corner and tags Simon. Pumped up by the rest of his teammates, the Box Office Draw storms inside and is brought down by an arm drag takeover! Down but not out Simon RISES UP~ and lands a back elbow to free himself from Tyler’s clutches. * CHOP * “WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” * CHOP * “WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” * CHOP * “WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Following a trifecta of knife-edge chops, Tyler reverses Simon’s Irish whip and takes him around the world is a TILT… NO, SIMON COUNTERS WITH A HEADSCISSORS! Singleton charters a flight and… “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!” …EATS A SUPERKICK!! SYNTH, LOGAN, NED, MOLLY, HOLLY & COL. ABDULLAH :o COACH DAYUM~! ONE… TWO… THREE!! * DINGDINGDING * [b]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Simon Singleton Eliminated by: “Tremendous” Tyler Bryant (pinfall) Advantage: Kings of Leon, 4-3 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[/b] The Colonel and half-sister Molly help Simon outside and eventually to the back. Meanwhile, fellow BHB Ned Blanchard clubs Tyler from behind, then violates him in a non-sexual way in the corner -- punching and chopping the teen dream sensation before he STOMPS A MUDHOLE AND WALKS IT DRY! COLE The Handsome Hustler firing on all cylinders. He wants to even the odds once again for his team. Pelvic thrust earns Ned a thumbs down from Jade but a big cheer from Molly whose returned to ringside along with Colonel Abdullah after escorting Simon backstage. Ned fires Tyler into the ropes and hip… NO, Tyler twirls out and delivers a hip toss of his own! When Blanchard returns to his feet he’s leveled by a Jock Mulligan, now the legal man, HIGH CROSS BODY PURPLE MONEY DISHWASHER!! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Mulligan staggers Blanchard with Cowboy Bebop elbows, then flattens him with the TEXAS PRAYER BOOK! ONE… TWO… THREE-- NO! COACH Give the Handsome Hustler his due, Cole. He’s displaying a great deal of intestinal fortitude. COLE No doubt about it. The Texas Twister whips Ned in and snaps him over with a beautifully executed BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX! COLE 1337 Pwnage! Blanchard is moments away from joining his partner in the shower. Unbeknownst to him and the announcers, there was a blind tag, and Synth capitalizes with a SECOND ROPE ELBOW DROP! The cover! JOCK, LEON, TYLER, JADE & MELODY :huh: COLE What’s going on here? COACH I think we had a tag. ONE… TWO… THREE! “AWWWWWWWWWWW!” * DINGDINGDING * SYNTH :headbang: [b]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Jock Mulligan Eliminated by: Synth (pinfall) Advantage: Even, 3-3 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[/b] Leon and company protest the call, but the second official ringside verifies there was a tag. The Entertainers, meanwhile, celebrate as though they just won the match. Synth lets his guard down the most as he jams to his air guitar, and Baron clobbers him with a TOP ROPE LARIAT! ONE… TWO… THREE! * DINGDINGDING * “YEA!” [b]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Synth Eliminated by: Baron Windels Advantage: The Kings of Leon, 3-2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[/b] COACH You’ve got to be kidding me?!? COLE What a sudden turn of events. The Kings of Leon have regained the advantage. Unbelievable! Baron waves Logan in, and the Macho MACHO Mann obliges. The atmosphere is electric as both men come face to face. With their teammates cheering them on, Logan and Baron hook ‘em up! Mann rakes the eyes and rams Windels into the turnbuckle, but due to his face mask it doesn’t faze him one bit! LOGAN :o Stunned by a blow to the jaw, Logan is tossed into the corner and worked over with a combination of Cowboy Bebop elbows and American made right hands. Irish whip, and Baron scores with the MYSPACE COMEBACK! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Windels places Mann on the top rope for a SUPERPLEX, but Ned Blanchard yanks him off and delivers a series of rabbit punches. The Handsome Hustler holds Baron in position as Logan steadies himself on the turnbuckle. COACH Spread your wings and fly, Macho MACHO! Logan does… “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!” …AND DRILLS NED WITH A DOUBLE AXEHANDLE SMASH!! Colonel Abdullah and Molly can’t believe it. Logan shows little concern for Ned, shrugging his shoulders at him, allowing Baron to hit the BULLDOG out of nowhere!! The Colonel hops onto the apron and gets popped for his trouble. The cover! ONE… TWO… Referee Earl Hebner stops the count as Holly-Wood enters the ring, but Melody takes care of her with a SPEAR! “YEA!” COACH Kitty can scratch. Unfortunately she decided to attack a poor defensive young woman. COLE Give me a break. Holly is tougher than some of the guys, and Melody is kicking her ass! As officials try to separate the girls, Baron signals for the big boot…but Logan reverses and Ned drives the knee into the spine of the back. Baron stumbles forward into a DDT!!! COLE Percussion DDT! COACH And no one’s there to save Baron, Cole. Tyler and the Rodez family are busying helping the officials separate Melody and Holly. He’s going to be eliminated. ONE… TWO… THREE! * DINGDINGDING * [b]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Baron Windels Eliminated by: Logan Mann (pinfall) Advantage: Even, 2-2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[/b] Leon and Tyler are left shell-shocked, much like the Entertainers were earlier following the elimination of Synth. They help Baron out and then it’s ON, as Leon slides in and trades blows with Ned, who‘s now the legal man. After getting the worse of it Ned is whipped to the buckle, and Rodez flies in with the SUPERMAN SPEAR! Blanchard staggers out and is dropkicked from behind, causing him to land throat-first on the middle rope. “YEAH!” COLE Uh-oh. Ned’s in big trouble here and the crowd knows it. The New-Age Love Machine does a little dance and drops all his weight across… NO, Ned moves, but Leon manages to bounce off and land on his feet. Thinking he’s escaped a bullet the Handsome Hustler points to his head, only to turn around and… JAB! JAB! JAB! JAB! * blow kiss, deck Logan because he can, and then finish Ned with an enziguri * …have Leon tell him MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT!!! “YYEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” ONE… TWO… THR-- NO! SAVE BY LOGAN! COLE Can you believe that? Logan saved Ned! If I had told you that 11 months ago… COACH I’d have thought you were crazy. The Kings of Leon make a tag, and Tremendous Tyler sends Ned in, up and down courtesy of a GUT BUSTER, and follows it up with a SHINING ENZURIGI~! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Quick tag, and the Kings of Leon ROCK YOUR BODY with a sweet Samoan drop/neckbreaker combo on Ned! ONE… TWO… But only two, as Logan pulls Ned to safety outside. The KOL respond with another fast tag and Tremendous Tyler dives out onto the remaining Entertainers with a SUICIDE DIVE! Blanchard is rolled back in and relives a painful memory, his torrid affair with Krista Isadora Duncan, as OPPOSITES ATTRACT!! COLE The Entertainers are moments away from going down another man, their last man! As Leon is escorted back to his corner, Logan comes down off the top with a DOUBLE KNEEDROP ONTO THE BACK OF TYLER’S HEAD!! Ned drapes the arm across Tyler’s chest. ONE…. TWO… THREE! * DINGDINGDING * [b]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: “Tremendous” Tyler Bryant Eliminated by: Ned Blanchard (pinfall) Advantage: The Entertainers, 2-1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[/b] COACH They’re starting to drop like flies now, Cole. COLE It’s come down to captains of each team, but the odds heavily favor the Handsome Hustler and the Macho MACHO Mann. “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” “LE-ON!” The crowd rallies behind Leon as he faces the daunting task of having to eliminate both Ned and Logan to achieve victory. The Silky Smooth One wastes no time getting started, jumping right on top of Ned, peppering him with right hands. He whips Blanchard across and smashes him with a FLYING FOREARM! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Determined to score a quick pin, Leon wraps Ned up in a small package. ONE… TWO… THR-- NO! Now a backslide from Rodez. ONE… TWO… But again Ned kicks out. LIONTAMER coming up, but Leon’s six sense kicks in and he slingshots Ned towards the Entertainers corner, causing a collision between him and Logan as the Macho MACHO Mann set to come off the top! LOGAN :o Rodez hooks Blanchard in a front facelock and runs up the turnbuckles, kicking Logan in the face as he flips back and plants the Handsome Hustler with Slice Bread #2. COLE Feedback THIS, Ned Blanchard! ONE… TWO… THREE! “YYEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!” * DINGDINGDING * [b]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Ned Blanchard (pinfall) Eliminated by: Leon Rodez Advantage: Even, 1-1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[/b] COACH What action! These guys have been going non-stop for 15-20 minutes by now. Maybe more. With Logan still crotched on the top, Leon brings him down with a SUPERPLEX! ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Scoop slam near the corner, and the Grand Rapids Golden Child heads to the top for his patent 450 SPLASH… “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!” …BUT LOGAN GETS THE KNEES UP!! COLE And just like that Logan Mann is back in control. More importantly perhaps, Leon’s window of opportunity may have closed with that move right there. That had to suck the life out of him and his supporters. Mann smashes Rodez in the turnbuckle and pummels him with an array of sharp left jabs to the face and body. Irish whip, and Leon is decked by a running elbow. Logan then heads up and delivers a double axe handle smash. ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! Logan applies a choke and waits until the very last second to break. He slams Leon in the center and heads back up…FLYING DOUBLE KNEEDROP!! COACH Thanks for stopping by Leon. Have a safe trip home. ONE… TWO… THREE! NO!! “YYYEEEEEAAAAHHHHHHHH!” LOGAN :huh: Logan scoops Leon back up, but the Silky Smooth One slips over the top and surprises the Macho MACHO Mann with a quick roll-up! ONE… TWO… THREE! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" * DINGDINGDING * [b]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Logan Mann (pinfall) Sole Survivor: Leon Rodez ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[/b] BUFFER Here is your sole survivor… "SILKY SMOOTH" LLLEEEEEEOOOOONN RRRRROOOOOOODDEEEEEEEZZZZZZ!!! COACH What the hell just happened?! COLE Unbelievable! Leon Rodez defied the odds and came back to win. Leon and Jade celebrate while Lolly remain in a state of shock. [b][color="#0000FF"]ANGLEPALOOZA[/color] [color="#FF0000"]Sunday, January 27, 2008[/color] LIVE! ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW[/b]

WRITTEN BY King Cucaracha Ed Wood Caulfield Alfdogg Tony149 OAOAST CREATED BY Anglesault Tony149 CWM DIRECTED BY Tony149 © 2007 OAOAST Entertainment

TV 14 LV PRESENTED IN HD Several OAOAST superstars are shown in a cafeteria, with much chatter going on. The camera pans across a long table featuring several turkeys, along with assorted amounts of side dishes. Once it gets to the end of the table, the massive hand of Deon Black palms a turkey and takes a huge bite out of it, then sets it back on the table. Thunderkid is standing at the table, and he looks down at the turkey, then back at Black who is walking away. Spanish Fly is sitting at a table with Colombian Heat and Jamie O'Hara, when Felix Strutter approaches the table along with the Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew. STRUTTER Look at this guy, man...our turkey last year was bigger than this guy! The SCMs laugh along with Felix. LUCIUS Look, man, he's finally grown out of his booster seat! At this point, Colombian Heat emerges from his seat, and Fly restrains him. FLY Come on, bro, save it for the match tonight! HEAT Yeah, that's right, playa...Y'all are gonna go down tonight, in more ways than one! RICO You guys are in big trouble, we eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast! O'HARA You eat pieces of shit for breakfast??? HEAT/FLY *awkward pause* RICO ...NO! The HWC hastily walk away. Pan around to some more tables, when suddenly... FUCKHEAD SHITFACE COCKSUCKER, ASSHOLE SONOFABITCH! The cafeteria grows silent, as the camera cuts over to the table where Vinny Valentine sits with his head in his hand, next to Tony Tourette. The camera pans around to several tables, as Leon Rodez, Brock Ausstin, the Heavenly Rockers, and Jesse Ventura sit stunned. Alfdogg is shown at his table, working on a piece of cherry pie, then realizing he's on camera, dropping his fork and quickly feigning the same stunned look. The camera then pans back to Leon, who decides to join in. SCUM-SUCKING MOTHERFUCKING WHORE!!! The whole room then turns and looks at Leon, who looks slightly embarrased at first, then cracks a grin. Jumbo is shown behind Leon in the background, at a table near the entrance with Deuce and Denzel Spencer. JUMBO (pumping his fists at his sides) COCK! COCK! JISM, GRANDMA, COCK! Jumbo laughs and high-fives Deuce. TONY TOURETTE DOG-SHIT TACO~! Everyone starts to talk again, which makes Vinny start to get comfortable. O'HARA BUMFUCK TURD, FART...CUNT, PISS, SHIT...BUGGER, and BALLS! HEAT/FLY Michael Cole is sitting at a table with the rest of the announcers, including Ventura and Coach who are sitting around him egging him on. COLE DAMMIT...HELL...CRAP... ... ...SHIT~! Jesse and Coach laugh, then high-five each other. TONY SHIT-FACE COCKMASTER~! VINNY FELLATIO, CUNNILINGUS, FRENCH-KISSING! Vinny looks around some more, as the room has grown silent again. VINNY ...Rimjob! ENTIRE ROOM MAGGIE NERDLY YOU GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING BITCH! ROOM The reason for the is because Jade Rodez has just walked into the room, late for the meal, and thus thinks the "insult" is directed at her. JADE Fuck you, you carwash CUNT! I had a DENTAL APPOINTMENT! ALF ...on Thanksgiving? Jade picks up a bowl of cranberries from the nearest table, and tosses them across the room, landing directly on the top of Maggie's head! Jumbo then stands up. JUMBO Those were my cranberries, you whore! Jade then grabs a turkey and swings it backwards, hitting Jumbo in a very tender spot. JADE How are your cranberries now? Jade then slams the turkey onto Jumbo's head. Alf grabs a bowl of punch, and dumps the contents on top of Colombian Heat. Fly then jumps onto the table. FLY FOOD FIGHT! Logan Mann lets Thunderkid have it with a full plate of corn and potatoes, while Team Heyross sneaks up on Holly-wood and delivers a pumpkin and blueberry pie to each respective side of her face! Holly is in shock, and starts wildly throwing dinner rolls, not caring who she hits. Fly jumps onto the back of Deon Black and sprays whipped cream from a can into his eyes, which somehow blinds him. (srsly, it's whipped cream, just wipe that shit out, lol.) He grabs Strutter's face in his blinded fury and shoves into a bowl of green bean casserole. D*LUX then starts hammering him on the back with turkeys. Suddenly, and inexplicably, Black Sweat plays throughout the cafeteria. Everyone stops and looks around, as MISTER Warrior runs into the room. He runs three laps around the cafeteria (slipping in a pile of mashed potatoes on his second lap, but that doesn't stop him because he's MISTER Warrior), then does a BIG SPLASH onto the table of food, sending it everywhere. LEON OH NO! JADE OH NO! ALF OH NO! VINNY OH NO! COLE OH NO! JUMBO (holding a pitcher of Kool-Aid) OH YEAH! The room pauses once again, and stares at Jumbo. He looks around, then dumps the contents of the pitcher (cherry, in case you're wondering) onto Jade's head, and runs out of the room. Jade gives chase, and then the food fight resumes, as the camera pulls out. CUE: “Party Like a Rockstar HAPPY THANKSGIVING BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! B O O M ~! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" LIVE! Salt Lake City, Utah COLE 3 nights away from the Thanksgiving weekend tradition, November Reign, we welcome you to HeldDOWN~! And a Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours from everyone in the OAOAST. Michael Cole alongside Jonathan Coach... COACH COLE (sighs) Not again. Coach? COACH COLE COACH!? COACH *Snort* Whuh? Oh, man, don't tell me. I dozed off? COLE You said it wasn’t going to happen this year. Anyway, fans, what a program we have for you. We’ll be kicking the show off with a little taste of what’s to come this Sunday night at November Reign as our great tag team division compete in an elimination match. Then it’s 6-man mayhem in our main event, as reigning OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion Stephen Joseph teams with Tha Puerto Rican and Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix to face Zack Malibu, Todd Cortez and Bohemoth! In fact, we’re ready to go up… Wait a minute! I understand Stephen Joseph and Tha Puerto Rican have come face to face in the back. Let’s go there right now! The camera cuts to The Lightning Crew dressing room where Stephen Joseph Popick and "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican are standing up. The crowd responds with a mixture of boos and cheers. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez is sitting on the leather couch, wearing hoop earrings, a gold necklace, a white dress shirt, gold bracelets around her wrists, her engagement ring on her right ring finger, a black plaid skirt, and black combat boots. And her hair is in pigtails. The OAOAST Women's Championship belt is sitting next to her on the couch. Popick and PRL are in their business suits. Popick is holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt over his right shoulder. STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK All right. All right. We're almost there! It's almost Sunday. It's almost November Reign! And P, I know we're close like brothers, but I hope you understand that this Sunday...I gotta treat you like an enemy. I'm the World Heavyweight Champion, which means I have a target on my back. And this Sunday, I gotta fend off four of the greatest superstars the wrestling world has ever seen...and the most electrifying man in all of professional wrestling! "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION" THA PUERTO RICAN YEAH-UH~! POPICK So, I hope you know that anything and everything I do to you in the Triple Decker Cage Match is not personal...it's just business. THA PUERTO RICAN I understand. And I hope you know that anything and everything I do to you in the Triple Decker Cage Match is not personal...it's just business. Popick seems caught off guard. POPICK Uh...yeah, yeah. Yeah. Anyway, last week, we'd clear on that? THA PUERTO RICAN Yeah. I just...lost my spark, is all. I don't know. I just didn't feel like doing it. I didn't want to give Colombian Heat a Conchairto. POPICK Understand. We all have our moments of weakness. I do. Not many, but they're there. Anyway, that's the past. We need to focus on the future, like tonight, when we team up with The Cockroach one more time to soften up three of OUR November Reign opponents. Then onto Sunday, and the Triple Decker Cage Match. P, this is the biggest Title defense I've EVER had to make. But you know what? You know something? I'm ready. I'm ready for the challenge. I'm ready to take on all five of you. And P, remember, when that bell rings, all bets are off, bro. PRL I got'cha. I got'cha. I know how much that belt means to you. POPICK It means alot. It means the world to me. So, I hope you let bygones be bygones, and go into the match on Sunday with a clear head. I know The Lightning Crew will be rooting for you, but I sure hope they'll be rooting for me too! MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ We will, Popick! Don't worry! POPICK Good to know! I'm so excited! I can't wait until Sunday! But we got one more match before then, so let's go get ready for it, huh? THA PUERTO RICAN All right then. I gotta go tinkle. POPICK Okay. Later, Puerto. PRL Later. LINDSAY Later, babe. PRL Later, sweetie. Tha Puerto Rican opens the door to The Lightning Crew dressing room and exits the room. He waves goodbye to Lindsay and Popick and then closes the door. P.R. then walks down the hallway. He makes a right turn and bumps into Colombian Heat! PRL Oh sorry. COLOMBIAN HEAT Nah, it's cool, bro...oh. PRL Uh...hey. HEAT ...yo. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat stare at each other awkwardly for a few seconds. There's nothing but silence, surprising for two people known to run their mouths with no problem. PRL looks down at the ground, while Colombian Heat looks up at the ceiling. THA PUERTO RICAN So...what's up? HEAT Nuthin'. How 'bout you? PRL You know. Same old, same old. Trying to win the World Title for the first time in my career. HEAT Still haven't done it yet? PRL Nope. HEAT Oh. Okay. THA PUERTO RICAN Listen...uh...last week...I hope you know...I wasn't really going to hit you with that chair. I had no intention of doing a Conchairto on you. HEAT I kinda figure you wouldn't. You're not THAT evil. At least I don't think so. PRL Yeah. I'm not. And um...uh...I'm...I'm...I'm sorry. I'm sorry that Popick made you fight me. I had no idea. Trust me. I had no clue he was going to do that. I swear to you. HEAT It's cool, G. It's cool. I almost had you didn't I? Heh, heh, heh. PRL Yeah. Heh. You did. Heh, heh. Tha Puerto Rican's half-smile fades away. He takes a deep sigh. Colombian Heat just looks at the floor. PRL looks up at Heat. THA PUERTO RICAN Sooo...I gotta go. Got to go get ready for my match. HEAT Yeah, me too. PRL All right. I guess I'll see you, Heat. HEAT Yeah, man. See ya. PRL Peace. Tha Puerto Rican nods his head and then turns to walk away. COLOMBIAN HEAT Yo, PR! PRL turns around. COLOMBIAN HEAT ...Thanks...fo' not hittin' me with tha chair. PRL You're welcome. No problem. Hey...are we actually talking to each other and not fighting each other? HEAT ...Yeah. I guess we is! PRL When's the last time THAT happened? HEAT It's been a long time, bro. PRL Yeah, it has. PRL's smile fades away again. So does Colombian Heat's. Both men sigh. THA PUERTO RICAN Uh...later. HEAT Late. "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat nod their heads. Both men turn and walk away. The crowd doesn't know how to react. OAOAST HeldDOWN~! 20 MAN TAG ACTION D*LUX, Christ Air Express, Los Diablos de Fuego, Lone Star Gunslingers, Colombian Heat & Spanish Fly vs Team Heyross, Heavenly Rockers, Beverly Hills Blonds, Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew, Brains & Brawn NEXT!

The camera cuts to the backstage area where Colombian Heat and Spanish Fly are standing by. Heat has the OAOAST United States Championship belt lying on a big case next to him. Heat is holding his head, while Spanish Fly is holding his neck. COLOMBIAN HEAT Yo, we did good out there, G. SPANISH FLY Yeah, we did. We could have survived to the end. HEAT Yeah, no doubt. But now, we gotta think about dis Sunday, bro. Ladder Match. Mah belt is on tha line. FLY I know. I know. Listen, no matter what happens...I'll still be your friend afterwards. I mean that. HEAT Yeah, man. Same here. We is partners for life! Belee dat! FLY May the best man win. HEAT Yeah, may tha best man win, dude. Colombian Heat and Spanish Fly shake hands. They then stare at each other. There is awkward silence between the two best friends as they know what's on the line this Sunday. Both Heat and Fly look down at the floor at the same time, and then look up at each other again. Spanish Fly sighs. Colombian Heat sighs too. The crowd cheers. MAGGIE What's really good, everyone? Maggie Nerdly back here and let's bring in my guest at this time... "The Franchise" of the OAOAST, ZACK MALIBU! As the crowd out in the arena cheer wildly at the video screen, Zack walks into shot. He gives Maggie a warm smile as he stands beside her, already in his ring gear. MAGGIE And Zack, a big week for you. First off, it's Thanksgiving, which means it's yam time. Love me some yams. But besides that, you've got a big six-man tag team match tonight AND let's not forget, the Triple Decker, Three Tier, Ready 2 Rumble Doomsday Cage Match this Sunday night at November Reign! What's on your mind right now? ZACK No wonder Leon's into you. MAGGIE Thanks! ZACK Hmm. You know, you bring up Thanksgiving and it is a big week for me. Obviously in my personal life it's a time for myself, Candie and Jenna to celebrate Thanksgiving as a family and for me to be thankful for the amazing life I've got. And as far as my professional life goes, I've got the chance to go back to the top of the mountain again. To become four-time OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion. And to take the belt off of Stephen Joseph Popick. Zack's face scowls at merely saying Popick's name. ZACK See, with Landon, it was an issue of pride. Safe to say, there's a clash of personalities between us two. But when it comes to Popick, it's an issue of plain hatred. Seeing the OAOAST Title on Popick's shoulder, around Popick's waist, anywhere within a three mile radius of him, it makes me feel physically sick. But come Sunday night it's not going too be about personal issues. I can't concentrate on just one guy, just one opponent. Not just Popick, not just Landon. I've got to outlast five other men. And I've got to concentrate on those three cages, stacked one atop the other, the belt hanging some fifty odd feet above the ground in the rafters. Else, I might not walk out in one piece. So tonight, tonight's a chance to get my hands on three people who I don't have a whole lot of time for. Tonight, I guess you could say it's personal. Sunday night it becomes business. Sunday night, my only concern is that title. Suddenly, Zack's attention is drawn away from the barrel of the camera. He looks to his left, as BOHEMOTH walks over, drawing another cheer out in the arena. Lowering his orange-tinted sunglasses, Bo looks at Zack... and extends his hand. Zack, despite looking a little confused at the interruption, accepts the handshake BOHEMOTH Glad to hear you're so driven to win the title Sunday... it means we've something in common. That said, Bo walks off from whence he came, giving Zack plenty to think about as he watches on. -BACK TO SOFA CENTRAL- COLE Well. That sounded more than a little ominous on Bohemoth's part. The bigman making his intentions VERY clear to The Franchise right there. COACH And you heard Zack say it would be business, not personal. You know it's going to be the same for Bohemoth too. Zack and Bo will be team-mates tonight, but it's going to be every man for himself inside the three cages this Sunday, so don't expect to see many more handshakes between those two! The camera cuts to the backstage area where "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican, Stephen Joseph Popick, and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez are walking. The crowd gives the three of them a noticeable mixed reaction. PRL and Popick are in their wrestling gear. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez has the OAOAST Women's Championship belt over her right shoulder. Stephen Joseph Popick has the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship belt around his waist. All three are all smiles as they walk to the entrance, chatting it up along the way. COLE And there are two of the participants in the Six-Man Tag Team Match! All six men involved in the Triple Decker Cage Match for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship this Sunday at November Reign are about to get it on in tag team action in just a few moments! The main event of Thanksgiving HeldDOWN~! is coming up next! FADE OUT The OAOAST Event Tracker is Brought To You By Gillette-The Best a Man Can Get November 25 (November Reign) - Las Vegas, NV November 29 - Portland, OR December 6 - Tacoma, WA December 13 - San Fransisco, CA December 20 - Fresno, CA December 27 - Phoenix, AZ * COMMERCIAL BREAK * COLE Incase the incensent reminders haven't gotten through to you yet, November Reign is this Sunday night, live on Pay Per View. To be headlined by one of the biggest main-events, both in stature and importance, in OAOAST history, the Triple Decker Cage Match... COACH Honest this time. COLE ...for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship. It's six men, three cages and only one man walking out as World Champion. Something's gotta give in three days time. But something could very well give here tonight too, as we're about to see the six men involved in that monumental match in six-man tag team action. A lot of combustable elements involved in this one, with so much between them at stake, so AngleSault's made a gutsy decision to be making this match so close to November Reign. COACH Well, it's a good back-up plan. But, no, seriously, it's gonna happen this year. Honest this time. COLE And if that doesn't fill you with confidence, nothing will. Let's go to the ring. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a six-man tag team match, scheduled for one fall! Introducing, team number one... "PREPARE...FOR...LANDON!" ...WAAAAAHHHHH... *DUM DUM* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" First music to cue is "Megalomaniac" by Incubus. And first reaction, predictably enough, is boos. Stepping through the entrance door, Landon Maddix walks through the hall of mirrors that is about a dozen video screens, behind, beneath and around him, picked out by red and yellow strobe lights, somehow managing not to have a seizure in the process. (I miss the sliding doors!) More than comfortable surrounded by himself, or images of himself at least, Landon strikes an OTT pose before walking on to the ring. BUFFER First, he hails from Huron, South Dakota by way of Madrid, Spain... weighing in at two hundred and eight pounds. He is accompanied to the ring by MEGAN SKYE... the former OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion... LLLAAAAAAAANNDDOOOOOOON "LA CUCARACHAAAAAAA"... MMMMMAAAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIXXXXXXXX!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE The current SWF Commissioner, also. Whether that says much for the SWF or not is up to personal opinion, I suppose. COACH Hey, at least it's actually got a real name, not some nonsensical crap like 'The One And Only Landon Maddix Discussion Thread'. COLE True dat. As Landon reaches the ring, he stops to exchange words with some of the fans near one corner of the ring. As he climbs the steps towards the ring though, he pays for his time-wasting, by having his entrance rudely interrupted. The lights go down in the arena. A Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them: *THE CHAMP IS HERE!* With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and "Know Your Role '99" begins playing. PR is heard saying, "THE CHAMP IS HERE!" throughout the song, while smoke fills the entryway and strobe lights appear on the entrance set. A few seconds elapsed, and out from the curtains and through the smoke marches "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican. BUFFER His partners! First, he comes to us from San Juan, Puerto Rico... weighing in at two hundred, twenty pounds and being accompanied by the OAOAST World Women's Champion, Ms. LINDSEY GONZALEZ! Here is, "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION"... THA PUUUUUEEEEEEEERRTOOOOOOOO RRIIIIIIIIIIIICCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANN!!! PRL gets a surprisingly mixed reaction, not the usual wall of hatred he's used to. So much so that he actually stops halfway down the aisle besides a group of the more raucous fans and flashes them the "Corporate Eyebrow". PR shakes it off though and marches on to the ring regardless. He slides in, exchanging a venomous look with Landon on his way to the turnbuckles to soak in the electricity in the arena. And again, he gets a surprisingly mixed reaction. COACH So this is where all the Puerto Ricans migrate to, Salt Lake. Good to know. COLE You don't neccessarily have to be Puerto Rican to support Tha Puerto Rican at the moment, Coach. I'm sure some of these fans feel like PRL was screwed out of another opportunity a couple of weeks ago back in his home country, not to mention the way he's been treated by his supposed 'Career Consultant'. COACH Oh! So it's because they feel sorry for him. Gotcha. COLE That's not what I said at all. COACH But it's what you meant, admit it. PRL's turning into the OAOAST's Martin Scorcese and getting the sympathy vote because he's never been able to win the big one on merit. That's what you're getting at. Having worked all four turnbuckles, PRL comes to a stop and face to face with Landon and Megan. Seeing a bad situation about to unfold for their men, Megan and Lindsey step in to play peace-keepers, at least for the time being as the Puerto Rican and the Spaniard exchange some 'Spanish pleasantries'. "Work itmake itdo itmakes usharderbetterfasterstronger" "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" But suddenly, Lindsay and Megan's job is done for them. As the intro to "Stronger" by Kanye West begins to pump through the arena, in unison both Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican's attentions turn to the entrance way and the imminent arrival of the common enemy/partner, the World Heavyweight Champion himself. A cascade of pyro begins to fall from the ceiling, masking behind them the figure of Stephen Joseph Popick. "I NEED YA RIGHT NOW!" Popick steps through the sparks and sparks the crowd into life again, trying to jeer the World Champion right back out of the arena. Popick just smirks, raising the OAOAST Championship over his head and nodding his head. BUFFER And... hailing from Atlanta, Georgia! He weighs in at two hundred and twenty five pounds... the reigning, two-time OAOAST HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WOOOOOOOOORRRRRRLLLD... SSTTTTEEEEEPPHHEENN... JJJOOOOOOOOSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEPPPHH... PPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPIIIIIIIIIIICCKK!!!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Swaggering to the ring with all the confidence a World Champion should possess, Popick gives PRL a thumbs up from the outside. PRL responds, eventually, with a half-hearted thumbs up back. Climbing the ring steps, Popick climbs the turnbuckles on the outside and raises his World Title in the air again. The camera pans out from him, showing both Landon and PRL's gazes aimed right up at the belt shining in the arena lights. COLE Maddix and PRL, both looking up at the OAOAST Championship. They're going to have to crane their necks up a little higher to do that this Sunday night, when that belt is going to be hung some 30-40 feet up in the rafters of the Bellagio Hotel and Casino. Popick climbs into the ring, hooking up with PRL and hyping up his 'protegé'. Left on the sidelines, Landon goes back to bemoaning the fact he's in this match at all. COLE How the hell are these three going to co-exist Coach? COACH They'll be fine. Popick and PRL are former HI-YAH Tag Team Champs after all. They've been having some 'creative difference' sure, but nothing that can't be worked out. Why don't you ask the same question about the opponents though? You've got Zack and Cortez, who's history pretty much speaks for itself. And let's not forget the little 'téte-a-téte' Zack had with Bohemoth earlier either. COLE ...wait, when the hell did you learn French!? COACH Last Mecredi. COLE Last Wednesday!? ...wait, when the hell did I learn French!? .:CUE: "Getting Away With Murder", Papa Roach:. As the unlikely threesome in the ring look on, the crowd erupt for the entrance of ZACK MALIBU! Bathed in the sparks that Popick left behind, Zack looks out from under the hood of his entrance jacket, into the crowd. Pulling down the hood, Zack then heads down the aisle with more pyro erupting in his trail. BUFFER And, introducing the opponents! First, from Providence, Rhode Island... weighing in at two hundred and ten pounds, here is the former three-time OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion and the true "FRANCHISE" of the OAOAST... ZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK... MMMMMMMAAAAAAAAALLLLLIIIIIBBUUUUUUUUUU!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Zack pulls up just short of the ring, preferring to wait for back-up... ...in the form of perrenial rival, Todd Cortez! "Oh No" by Mos Def, Nate Dogg, and Pharoah Monche plays out The Urban Legend, heralding yet more pyro. Cortez looks as focused as ever, exchanging the merest of glances with Zack as they meet up in the aisle. BUFFER His partner, hailing from 'Hollywood Boulevard'! He weighs in at two hundred, twenty six pounds... "THE URBAN LEGEND"... TTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODD... CCCOOOOOOORRRRRRTTEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZ!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Cortez stares into the ring, directly at a suddenly very fidgety La Cucaracha. COACH Now here's a guy who's not above putting someone out of commission. We might end up with five guys in that cage this Sunday if Cortez has anything to say about it. COLE Todd Cortez, very much a lone wolf. He's one of those guys who just likes to fight, he's spent his entire life trying to survive, he's had to fight for everything he's ever got, everything he's ever achieved. When those cages come down at November Reign, he may yet be the biggest threat to Popick's World Title. *BbwWbAhmotherfuckerLlIiiBbbEErRrAATtTeeyYyOUUurRrMmmMmMiIInNnDddDd!!* "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COACH Here's someone who might disagree! The fans proceed to go BANANA~ as "Liberate" by Disturbed powers out through the speakers! Out marches Bohemoth, striding down the aisle with a glare shining through his orange tinted sunglasses. BUFFER And, rounding out the team! Hailing from Greenville, South Carolina and weighing two hundred and eighty four pounds... "THE METEROSEXUAL MONSTER"... BBOOOOOOOOOOOO - HHHHEEEEEEEEEMMOOOOOOOOOTTHHHHHHH!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Bo marches right down the aisle and right past Zack and Cortez, who quickly follow the bigman's lead. With the numbers even, Zack and Cortez enter the ring ready to fight. But, with the numbers even, Popick, Landon and PRL all decide to bail to the outside. Bo leans over the ropes daring them back in, COLE When we return, it's six man tag team action! Bo, Zack and Cortez versus Popick, PR and Landon, don't go anywhere! *COMMERCIAL BREAK!* As we return to OAOAST HeldDOWN~!, we see that poor old Landon Maddix's month hasn't gotten any better. Held by the arm by Zack Malibu, Landon drops to a knee and begs off as BOHEMOTH is tagged in for the first time, either on-air or off. The crowd erupt as Bo steps in and hits Maddix across the shoulder with an elbow so hard, it causes him to do a 360 into the mat face-first! MADDIX *begs off* COLE Welcome back to HeldDOWN~!, where Landon Maddix is counting down the days until November Reign! Bringing Maddix off his knees, Bohemoth clamps his hands around La Cucaracha's throat and pitches him through the air! Landon hits the turnbuckles in the ZaCortEmoth corner hard, staggering right back out into a right hand from the bigman. As soon as he hits the mat Landon clutches his jaw, rolling to his knees and frog-walking his way over to his corner with a hand meekly extended in front of him. PRL and Popick don't seem eager to accept the offer of a tag though, taking a lean back in their corner while Bohemoth walks over and drags Maddix away. "YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Irish whip, sends Landon crashing into a neutral corner and leaves him trapped in the path of an oncoming AVALANCHE! Maddix literally falls into Bohemoth's grasp, looking unable to stand under his own power at the moment. Hooking the arm, Bohemoth doesn't provide a resting post for long as he hurls Maddix through the air with a huge hiptoss, pitching him almost halfway across the ring! COLE Wow! Landon was up in the lights on that one! COACH Come on PR, do something! COLE What about Popick!? COACH Ah, he's the Champ, he's got an investment to protect. Scooping Maddix up, Bohemoth plants him with a simple slam. Off the ropes, the bigman from Greenville drops an elbow and goes for the cover... 1... 2... Save by PRL! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COLE Well there you go Coach, PRL in to 'help' out his partner. Although, maybe prolonging this match any longer isn't the kind of help Landon would want right now. Bohemoth glares at PRL as he's shepherded out of the ring. As if he needed any more reasons to get his hands on him. Bo then drags Maddix up again, encountering a little fightback from La Cucaracha, who jabs Bo in the gut from his knees. And again. One clubbing blow to the back stops Landon though, writhing around a little over-dramatically at Bohemoth's feet. Reaching down, Bohemoth locks on a front facelock and pulls Maddix all the way up to and then off his feet, twisting his body around and sitting out with the Bo and ArroWii Rolling to his feet, The Meterosexual Monster is feelin' it, scanning the Salt Lake City crowd with a gleam in his eye... Thumbs Up. THUMBS DOW... *slap!* COACH Tag! Bohemoth's head snaps around as he feels a slap on the back, shocked to see Todd Cortez stepping into the ring and even more shocked to be told to leave the ring by the referee! In rushes Cortez, mounting Landon and going to town with left and right hands, watched very closely by the exiting Bo. COACH Do I smell a little discension in the ranks? COLE Well, suffice is to say Todd Cortez isn't here to make friends tonight. Don't expect these three to be challenging for the 6-Man Tag Team Titles any time soon. COACH ...we have 6-Man Titles? Pulling off of Landon, Cortez strides away into a neutral corner and sets himself. PRL thinks about coming off his post and going for a cheapshot, but the referee warns him off pretty quickly. So Cortez just waits crouched in the corner, as Maddix pulls himself up. Looking around, he sees no sign of an opponent and turns in search of his corner, hoping to make a tag... ...but gets cut off by the HOLLOW POOOOOOOOIIIIIIIIINNTT!! COLE Big tackle by Todd CorVo... uh, CorTez. As he gets up Todd manages to wander towards the PRL/Popick corner, prompting Popick to take a swing at him. Popick whiffs on it though, Cortez turning around and knocking him off the bottom rope with a thrust kick to the gut! Cortez then knocks PRL off the apron for good measure, before turning his attentions back to Landon. Standing headscissors, bringing the crowd to their feet, the set-up for the RIOT ACT PL... ...NO! Landon manages to pull out a backdrop to counter! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Finally Landon is able to make it to his corner now, PRL jumping back up onto the apron to tag himself back in. COACH Tag to Quagmire. COLE The Corporate Champion catches Cortez with a punch as he turns around. And another. A third... fourth, fifth, PRL unloading on Cortez, stopping only to spit on the left hand before connecting on the final punch! Cortez rolls into a neutral corner but PRL is right on him, kicking him in the breadbasket. Tha Puerto Rican then proceeds to stomp the proverbial mudhole into the torso of Todd Cortez, not forgetting of course to walk it dry as well. And surprisingly, this adrenaline fueled attack isn't being booed by all of the audience, as the excitement level picks up. Back on the apron, Popick applauds his man as finally the stomping stops and PRL marches away... ...taking a sharp detour to the left as he marches right towards Bohemoth... ...but other than that, PRL is all fired up! He drops into a crouch and now it's Cortez who's being stalked. The Urban Legend lifts himself to his feet, but is still penned in in the corner, as PRL soars through the air and connects on a Stinger Splash! PRL hOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWl! Off the ropes comes PRL, shooting backwards towards Cortez as he stumbles from the corner... and getting caught with a sudden Sitout SpineBUSTER!! 1... 2... NO! Popick again gives his partner some encouragement, as he and Cortez start to exchange right hands in the middle of the ring. Back and forth they go, until Cortez suddenly blocks one, firing off a kick, before spinning around and cracking PRL in the gut with a rolling sole BUTT! The unexpected kick knocked the wind out of Tha Puerto Rican and he falls onto his hands and knees, Cortez stepping over him and applying a Camel Clutch while waving towards his corner. Taking a few moments to realise he's waving to him, Zack eventually comes into the ring and with PRL helpless, he backs into the ropes and hits him in the crown of the head with a basement dropkick!! "OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Come on, that's two on one! That's your rolemodel, huh, taking cheapshots at opponents who can't defend themselves? With PRL hurting, Cortez accepts the tag from Zack. COLE Well, now whatever Zack does will be nice and legal. Straight up top goes The Franchise, lining up PRL and soaring onto him with a Body Splash from the heavens... 1... 2... No! As PRL kicks out, Zack hooks one of his arms between his legs. He then reaches out and grabs the other arm, before turning PRL back over onto his shoulders with a modified crucifix pin... 1... 2... NO! Backed against the ropes, PRL manages to goad Zack in and catch him coming in with a quick boot to the gut. PR then turns the tables and sends Zack off the ropes with an irish whip, ducking his head early for a Spinebuster. Zack sees it coming though, putting on the brakes and kicking PR in the shoulder blade... following it up with a Discus Clothesline as soon as PRL is snapped upright! Another cover... 1... 2... Kickout! "ZACK!" "ZACK!" ("p - r - l") "ZACK!" "ZACK!" ("p - r - l") While he waits for PRL to get back up, Zack suddenly does a quick 180 and rushes at Popick in the corner! But that proves a mistake as Popick sees it coming and dives off the apron to safety... and, before Zack can get back out of dodge, Landon Maddix rounds the corner and hangs him up throat-first across the top rope!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Zack staggers right back into the waiting arms of Tha Puerto Rican, bringing the knees up into the back and dragging Malibu down with the BACKCRACKER!! COACH Fantastic teamwork right there! What did I tell you? PRL hooks the leg on Zack... 1... 2... KICKOUT! PRL tags Stephen Joseph Popick into the match for the first time, to a chorus of boos, the OAOAST World Champion stalking the three-time former World Champion as he gets to his feet. A boot to the back of the head stops Zack from getting back up. Not once, but twice, Popick almost toying with Zack as he dares one of his partners to come in and save him. Cortez needs no further invitation to get in than that. But the ref cuts him off and it allows Popick to drop down to his knees, blatantly choking Malibu behind the ref's back!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" By the time Cortez leaves, Popick is innocently covering the prone Malibu... 1... 2... Kickout! "POP - ICK SUCKS!" "POP - ICK SUCKS!" "POP - ICK SUCKS!" "POP - ICK SUCKS!" Sneering at the chants, Popick pulls Zack back up and measures him for a couple of right hands to the jaw... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and gets CRACKED with a knifedge chop for his troubles! Shocked by that, Popick jabs a quick thumb in the eye of Malibu and ends his stint in the match early, rushing over to tag in Landon Maddix. COLE Well that didn't last long. Already laughing aloud even before his first successful move, Landon runs in... *SMACK!* "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" ...AND PROMPTLY GETS KOED WITH SCHOOL'S OUT!!!!!!! COLE AND NEITHER DID THAT!! Landon's eyes roll into the back of his head and he collapses to the mat, as Zack rolls to his corner and makes the tag to BOHEMOTH! The crowd erupt as The Meterosexual Monster comes in, PRL taking the place of his fallen partner and taking a huge clothesline for his trouble! Out of the ring rolls PRL, with Bohemoth about to follow, until Popick jumps him from behind. A few shots to the back soften Bo up, ready for an irish whip... ...or so the World Champ thinks, until he's reeled in by the arm and driven down with a Front SPINEBUSTAAAAAAH~! COLE Uh-oh... could be time! Bo pops back to his feet and glares down at the OAOAST Champion beneath him... Thumbs Up. THUMBS DOWN~! COACH Oh I hate this! Picking an un-co-operative Popick off the canvas, Bohemoth scoops him into his arms and parades him around the ring. Before he can put Popick down though, a sudden bolt of Puerto Rican Lightning shoots through the air, coming off the top with a Missile Dropkick that knocks Popick on top of Bohemoth... 1... 2... NO! In to even the odds comes Todd Cortez, catching a shocked PRL with a clothesline that takes him all the way up and over the top rope, to the floor with a thud! Popick tries a quick cheapshot to make sure Cortez suffers the same fate. But Cortez sees it coming and ducks his head, backdropping Popick up and over to the arena floor as well. COLE LOOK OUT! Look out Cortez does, narrowly avoiding Zack Malibu sprinting towards him AND TORPEDOING HIMSELF OUT ONTO PRL AND POPICK WITH A TOPÉ!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Another textbook landing for Air Zack! COACH I bet the travel insurance is a fucker though. As the three men lie in a heap on the floor, that leaves the other three in the ring. The problem for Landon Maddix, besides the stars and cartoon birds flying around in his line of vision after the superkick, is that two of them are his opponents. Landon staggers aimlessly into Bohemoth, who grabs him by the arm and applies a cobra clutch. And, with fear in his eyes, La Cucaracha is taken up... and almost snapped in half back down over Bohemoth's knee! COLE STYLE INJECTION... COACH ...oh no, not this as well! Holding onto the cobra clutch, Bohemoth pulls Maddix back off his knee and just throws him to Cortez. Happy to oblige, Cortez goes to the gut with a quick boot and pulls Landon into a standing headscissors. The crowd rise, as Cortez wraps the arms around the waist. And with a glaring look on his face, Cortez sets... *WHAM!* "YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" MEGAN COLE RIOT ACT PLUS~! Nobody kicks out of that! Cover by Cortez, Bohemoth looking on as Zack rolls back into the ring... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING!* BUFFER Here are your winners... the team of BOHEMOTH, ZACK MALIBU and TODD CORRRRRTTEEEEEZZZZZZ!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" Megan holds her head in her hands, as Cortez stands up and suddenly throws up his guard. Neither Bohemoth or Zack make a move towards hitting him but it's clear The Urban Legend was both expecting it and ready for it. Sure enough, that leads to a few words being exchanged by the victors. COLE The Riot Act Plus puts pay to Landon Maddix again here tonight. But we may not be done here. As an awkward staredown ensues between the three, Bohemoth, Cortez and Zack all seem to be waiting for one another to make the first move on the road to November Reign. But it seems like it's all something of nothing, just some words and some looks, warnings for this Sunday. The trio eventually turn out to where PRL and Popick have pulled themselves up on the outside, being helped by Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez. Looking into the ring, PRL typically runs his mouth at three of his fellow challengers... as, besides him, the World Champ looks on. Worried. FADE TO BLACK

Backstage we go to the boss' office. Coincidentally enough, just as we do, in walks Landon Maddix, chewing on a turkey leg. AngleSault glances up from his desk and quickly signs off on a piece of paperwork while he waits for Landon to finish his mouthful. ANGLESAULT Taking advantage of the hospitality I see? MADDIX You betcha. Decided it'd be best to take-out though. Too many strange characters around one table... too much like Thanksgiving at home. Anyway, I wanted to talk about tonight. This whole 'six man tag' thing you've got planned, I... I dunno, I think it's a little bit of a mistake for you to be having this match tonight. ANGLESAULT Oh really? Landon hands off his half-eaten turkey leg to Megan, which she's obviously *delighted* about. MADDIX Listen, let's not talk as president to employee. Just for a second, let's talk OAOAST President to SWF Commissioner. From one maker of matches to another. Now, if I had a match such as this Triple Decker Cage on the horizon on one of my SWF shows and I had a TV show on that same week... and, yes, I'm talking hypothetically at the moment... if that were the case, I'd be giving the guys involved all the time in the world to prepare. Especially considering the changes you've had to make to November Reign's main event already. The last thing you need is an injury or something like that. ANGLESAULT So, please enlighten me, what would you do as 'Commissioner'? MADDIX Two words. Hype. Central. Why don't we just go out there and talk instead? ANGLESAULT Like a mass debate? MADDIX Well, uh... yeah, sure, what guy doesn't? What that's got to do with anything though is beyond me. Landon looks over his shoulder at Megan. MADDIX Can you believe this guy? ANGLESAULT Look, Landon, I appreciate you coming in and talking this over with me... President to 'Commissioner'. But, I guess we have our own different ways of doing things because, tonight, I want to give the people of Utah a great show. And the main-event I promised them. So, the six-man tag is still on. Rolling his eyes, Landon sighs very audibly, running a hand over his head. MADDIX Boy, you know what... I think that turkey's beginning to disagree with me. Are you sure it was cooked okay? I might have to see the doc'... ANGLESAULT Landon, what's the problem? MADDIX What's the problem!? You've paired me up with Popick and PRL. Bestest best buddies, Popick and PRL. They're used to teaming together and they're also used to me being their enemy recently, which leaves me playing third wheel. And guess who's going to end up as the sacrificial lamb when they decide they want to save themselves for Sunday? Me! The moment I tag myself in... you think they'll really tag me out again? When they could just leave me to take on Bohemoth, Malibu and Cortez on my own, maybe give them one less person to deal with come Sunday? ANGLESAULT Look, calm down, okay. If you've got a problem with Popick and PRL, I'd guess most of it is your own doing anyway. Like some of your comments a couple of weeks ago, for example. MADDIX But that was just harmless cheap heat! ANGLESAULT Well, that's something to take up with PR then. The six of you are going to be competing tonight and that's that. MADDIX You know, that turkey did look a little pink in the middl... ANGLESAULT Get out Landon. Grumbling under his breath, Landon takes Megan by the arm as he storms out of the ring, taking an angry bite of the turkey leg on his way out. AS just chuckles under his breath and goes back to his paperwork. 'BACK' TO THE RING! Shine by Collective Soul plays, and a team of ten is led out by Charlie Moss and Quentin Benjamin. COLE A Thanksgiving day tradition here in the OAOAST, ten of the greatest tag teams in the world on display with elimination rules! Let's go to Michael Buffer! BUFFER The following is a ten-team elimination tag team match! Once one man from a duo is eliminated, his partner must leave as well. Introducing the first team! First, CHARLIE MOSS and QUENTIN BENJAMIN, TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMM HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! Team Heyross gets a mixed reaction, as Benjamin climbs to the middle rope from the outside and looks into the main camera, holding his arms out and delivering some self-complimentary verbage. BUFFER Introducing RICO DE JANIERO and "SWEET" LUCIUS SOUL...the MARDI GRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAS HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMME WRRRRRRRRRRRRECKING CRRRRRRRREWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWii!!! Rico rolls into the ring and twirls the moustache, as Lucius jaws with fans at ringside. It almost gets physical, but luckily Quentin Benjamin talks him back into the ring. BUFFER With their manager, Stacey Robinson...introducing VITAMIN X and CUBAN WALL...BRRRRRRRRRRRRRAIIIIINNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSS OVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWNNNNNNNNNN!!!!! X and Wall enter the ring and do the Lightning Crew Salute, to huge boos, then X does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle. BUFFER With their manager, Molly Nerdly, representing the Enterprise...introducing NED BLANCHARD and SIMON SINGLETON, the BEVERLY HIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSSSSSSSSS BLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONN NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! The Blonds pose for the fans, to boos. BUFFER And with their manager, Holly-wood, introducing the greatest Rock 'N' Wrestling band of ALL time...SYNTH ESIZER and LOGAN MANN...the HEAVENLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCKERRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! COACH What a team, Cole! What five tag teams could you possibly put together that could topple this unit? The Rockers give high-fives and tens to their teammates, as Shine dies down and Makes Me Wonder plays, and the crowd goes crazy as D*LUX leads their team out. COLE We may be about to find out! BUFFER Their opponents...first, along with their manager, Jade Rodez, here are SHAYNE BRAVE and TYLER BRYANT, DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE*LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LLLLLLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUXXXXXXXXXXXXX X XXXXXXX!!!!! D*LUX slaps hands with the fans as various girls hyperventilate. BUFFER Hailing from Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, here are Moracca and Mariachi, LOS DIABLOS DE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! The Diablos flirt with some attractive males in the front row, then dance on down to the ring. BUFFER Introducing the OAOAST United States champion, COLOMBIAN HEAT, and his partner, SPANISH FLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YYYYYYY!!!!! Heat and Fly slap hands with the fans, as Heat's pyro goes off in the entryway. BUFFER From San Antonio, Texas, introducing JOCK MULLIGAN and BARON WINDELS...the LONE STAR GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSL INGERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! The Gunslingers walk to the ring, then climb in and raise their arms. BUFFER And from Laguna Beach, California, here are MARV and MEL...the CHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIST AIR EXXXXXXPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! MEL and MARV climb into the ring, and pose on the buckles, drawing the cheers of the crowd, then exchange fives with their teammates. COLE And there is the scene, 20 men, two teams of ten, ready to get it on here on Thanksgiving HeldDOWN~! Both teams huddle up, then everyone climbs out, leaving MEL inside along with Synth Esizer. COLE And it'll be MEL of the Christ Air Express, starting off with Synth Esizer of the Heavenly Rockers! MEL and Synth tie up, and MEL wrings the arm of Synth. Synth reverses, but MEL counters that with a scoop slam! COLE And a nice counter move by MEL! Synth quickly rolls into his corner, and tags in Lucius. COLE Already a tag here, you'll see lots of quick tags in this one, with ten men on each side! MEL and Lucius tie up, and Lucius sneaks in a knee to the gut. Lucius hammers on the back with forearms, then whips him into the ropes. MEL ducks a clothesline, then hits a quick dropkick! Rico jumps in, and gets met with another dropkick! The Crew rolls out of the ring, as MEL celebrates. Lucius rolls back in, and tags in Vitamin X. MEL responds by tagging in COlombian Heat, who gets a big pop upon his entrance. COACH And look at this showdown, Cole! COLE Colombian Heat and Vitamin X! You remember that it was X who stole Heat's gf, Stacey Robinson, from him! VX throws a right hand, which is blocked and returned by Heat! Heat fires off some more rights, then backs him into the ropes. Wall tags himself in, unbeknownst to Heat. COLE Blind tag there by X's partner, Cuban Wall! VX reverses an Irish whip attempt, then Heat hops over, and runs into a big boot from WAll! COLE And Heat floored with that big foot of the Cuban Wall! Wall stomps away on Heat, then whips him into the ropes. Heat ducks another big boot attempt, then makes a blind tag of his own to Fly. COLE And now a blind tag on the other side! Heat slides under the legs of Wall, then jumps onto his shoulders. Fly then springs to the top rope, and dropkicks WAll from behind, allowing Heat to take him over with a hurricanrana! COLE Nice double-team move from Fly and Heat! Heat stays on top for the cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Fly measures Wall, and hits him with a dropkick! Wall staggers back into his corner, and tags in Quentin Benjamin. Benjamin sneaks a knee in to the gut, then grabs his head, and rams it into the outstretched foot of Ned Blanchard, before tagging Ned in. Ned hammers away in the corner, then attempts an Irish whip. Fly reverses, then takes Blanchard down with a drop toe hold! Fly follows with a dropkick, sending Ned back into his corner, where he tags Simon. COLE And Simon Singleton in the ring now, with Spanish Fly! Simon ties up with Fly, and the two exchange blows. Fly ducks one, and executes an atomic drop on Simon! Simon staggers into the ropes, where he's met with a right hand from Heat! COACH And Simon's caught in the wrong corner here! Simon takes another right from Fly, sending him back over, where Baron Windels decks him with a right, then back to Fly for another right, then a right from MARV, then Fly catches him with a spinning wheel kick! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Can't get caught in the opposing corner in this match! Simon quickly rolls into the corner, and tags in Lucius. Lucius charges, and gets caught with an armdrag by Fly, who then tags in MARV. MARV comes in and executes a snap suplex! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Lucius rolls over and tags in Rico, and he and MARV circle the ring then tie up. MARV grabs a side headlock, then gets shoved into the ropes. Rico knocks MARV to the mat with a shoulderblock, then picks him up and whips him into the corner. Rico charges, but MARV jumps up, then flips back down, rolling up Rico in a sunset flip! 1... 2... Kickout! Tags are made on both sides, as Vitamin X matches up with Mariachi. COACH And now it's one half of your favorite team in there, Cole! COLE ...Maybe. VX wins a slugfest, but Mariachi reverses an Irish whip attempt and catches VX with a dropkick! Mariachi then follows with an Irish whip, but VX reverses this time, and Charlie Moss catches Mariachi with a knee to the back! COLE And a big knee from the outside by Charlie Moss, unseen by the referee! Moss then tags in, and executes a gutwrench suplex! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Moss brings Mariachi into the corner, and tags in Rico. Moss and Rico execute a double-team Irish whip, and knock down Mariachi with a double elbow! COACH Some nice inter-team teamwork right there! Rico covers... 1... 2... Kickout! Rico whips Mariachi into the ropes, but puts his head down, and Mariachi delivers a kick, then tags out to Jock Mulligan! COLE And Jock Mulligan of the Lone Star Gunslingers! Jock charges, but gets caught with a big forearm to the gut. Rico whips Jock into the ropes, and catches him with a Harley Race-esque high knee! Rico starts to celebrate his feat, drawing boos from the crowd. He covers... 1... 2... Kickout! Rico tags in Lucius, who goes to the top rope. COLE Rico taking a chance here... Rico leaps off the top for a BIG SPLASH...but Jock rolls out of the way! COLE And it doesn't pay off! Jock tags in Windels, who comes in and lifts Lucius! COACH Uh-oh... COLE Could be the Lone Star Lasso! Jock comes off the ropes, and drills Lucius with the LONE STAR LASSO~!!!!!11111 COLE There it is! 1... 2... 3!!! COLE And the Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew has been eliminated! The Crew's partners agonize in the corner, while the Gunslinger side exchanges fist pumps and high fives. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1st elimination: Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew eliminated by: Lone Star Gunslingers (Baron Windels pinned Lucius Soul) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Baron quickly catches Wall coming in, and delivers a big right to the midsection. He then wrings the arm, and tags in Moracca, who comes off the top with a chop to the shoulder! COACH And Moracca's got to be quick here if he wants to have any chance at all! Moracca wrings the arm, and Wall easily breaks with a forearm to the face. COACH Big mistake, and now he's in trouble! Wall backs Moracca into a corner, and whips him across. He charges, but Moracca moves, and quickly tags Baron right back in. COLE But a smart move right there, tagging the big man back in! Baron hammers away with some big haymakers on Wall, then whips him into the ropes and catches him with a big boot! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Baron picks up Wall, who goes to the eyes and tags in Charlie Moss. Moss comes in and hooks Baron, taking him over with a double underhook suplex! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Moss chokes away at Baron, breaking at a four-count. He then backs into the ropes, but Baron rolls out of the way to avoid an elbowdrop! COLE Nobody home on that elbowdrop from Charlie Moss! Baron grabs a front facelock, and Shayne tags in, much to the delight of the crowd. COLE And here comes Shayne Brave, representing D*LUX! Shayne hops to the middle rope, and comes down with an axhandle onto Wall! He delivers some right hands, then wrings the arm, but Wall again counters with a stiff shot to the face. COACH But Shayne made the same mistake Morocca made earlier! He's got to move! Wall tags in Logan Mann, who hammers away on Shayne. However, Shayne starts firing back, then ducks a big left from Logan, and floors him with a leg lariat! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Shayne quickly grabs Logan, then rams him into the foot of Jock, who then tags in. Jock delivers a big right to the midsection, followed by a big headbutt which sends him reeling into the corner, where he tags Charlie Moss. Moss and Jock circle the ring, and tie up. Jock goes behind, and Moss quickly counters with a drop toe hold, then tags in Benjamin. Benjamin executes a legdrop to the back of the head, then he and Moss set him up, flooring him with the DOUBLE GOOZLE~!, much to the delight of their teammates. COLE There's the double goozle! 1... 2... However, Heat hops in for the save! COACH And this match could well be evened up had not Colombian Heat made the save right there! Benjamin hops up angrily, then tags in Simon. Simon goes to the top rope, and hits Jock with an elbow as he gets to his feet! Simon then whips Jock into a corner, but Jock comes out with a clothesline! COACH Jock better tag here! Tags are made on both sides, and Heat comes in firing on Benjamin. However, Simon grabs the leg of Heat as he lays on the mat, allowing Benjamin to take advantage. COACH Smart move by Simon Singleton, hooking that leg, distracting Heat long enough for Benjamin to level him! Benjamin delivers a couple shots, then tags Moss, who delivers a big shot to the gut as Benjamin holds Heat back. Moss then scoops Heat up, and puts him in a tree of woe, where he, Synth, VX and Wall all proceed to lay in on him. The referee hastily tries to restrain Heat's teammates from the ring, as Wall tags in. Wall lifts Heat up in a PRESS SLAM~!, tossing him down to the mat. Wall celebrates his feat, to boos. He then tags in Ned Blanchard, who steps through as Wall whips Heat to the ropes, and Ned catches him with the STUN GUN~!!!111 COACH YEAH~! COLE Stun Gun from Ned Blanchard! 1... 2... Fly saves! COLE And another save! Ned tags in Logan, who sends Heat into the ropes, but puts his head down, and Heat catches him with a spinning neckbreaker! Heat lays for a second, then rolls over and tags Fly! Fly comes in and fires off right hands on Logan, then runs to the ropes, and takes him over with a spinning headscissors! Logan lands in his corner, where he tags Synth, who gets caught with an armdrag! Synth gets to his feet, then whips Fly across, and goes for a hiptoss...but Fly spins through to his feet, and delivers one of his own! Synth quickly tags in Wall, as Fly tags in MEL, who gets caught with a back elbow before he knows what's even going on. COACH Nice, quick move there by the Wall! Wall hammers away, then tags in Simon, who whips MEL into the ropes. MEL ducks a clothesline, and hits him with a flying forearm! Tags made on both sides once again, as Tyler Bryant and Logan Mann come in. Logan goes to the eyes, then backs into the ropes, but Tyler leapfrogs, and catches him with a reverse monkey flip! COACH Look at how fast this action is, Cole! Tyler catches Logan with an armdrag next, and Logan makes a tag to Benjamin, who comes in and starts to exchange blows. Tyler gets the better of the exchange, but Benjamin goes to the eyes. He calls for the foot of Moss, who obliges as Benjamin rams Tyler's face into it, then tags Moss in. Moss hammers Tyler on the ropes, then whips him across and goes for a kick, but Tyler catches the foot! COLE And Charlie Moss is caught! Tyler trips Moss, then drops an elbow onto the leg, before tagging Shayne in. COACH And what a tag team matchup this is, Team Heyross vs D*LUX! Shayne picks up Moss, and delivers a scoop slam! He then picks him up again and whips him into the ropes, but puts his head down, and Moss delivers a kick. He then tags in Simon, who goes to the top rope, and delivers a big chop right between the eyes! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Simon backs Shayne into the ropes, where he makes a blind tag to Baron. Baron steps in as Shayne reverses the Irish whip, and catches him with the DEVIL'S ADDICTION~! COLE And there's that big fallaway slam of Baron Windels! 1... 2... NO! Shoulder up! COLE But Simon, to his credit, able to escape! Baron then tags in MARV, who sends Simon into the ropes, and catches him with a spinning wheel kick! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! MARV attempts another Irish whip, but this one is reversed, and Ned catches MARV with a knee to the back! Simon then tags Ned in, and Ned delivers an inverted atomic drop, then tags in VX. VX executes a snap suplex, then runs to the ropes, but MARV rolls out of the way to avoid an elbow, then tags in Mariachi! COLE Mariachi with the HAWT TAG~! Mariachi delivers quick right hands, then a dropkick which sends VX to the mat! Mariachi then retreats to the apron, springing up, and hitting a springboard seated senton! 1... 2... Kickout! COLE And X barely able to kick out! Mariachi delivers punches on the mat, stopping at a four-count. He then picks up VX and whips him into a corner, then charges, but VX moves out of the way...then scoops him up from behind, and swings him around for the X-CLAMATION POINT~!!!!!11111 COACH Atta baby! 1... 2... 3!!! COLE And we're all evened up! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 2nd elimination: Los Diablos de Fuego eliminated by: Brains & Brawn (Vitamin X pinned Mariachi) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Heat steps into the ring behind VX, and waves for him to turn around, hopping mad as he does it. When he does, Heat delivers quick right hands, then whips him into the ropes and catches him with a flying forearm! COLE Colombian Heat on fire here! Heat picks up VX, then lifts him and plants him with the DRIVE-BY~! COACH Come on, X! 1... 2... NO! Shoulder up! VX slowly gets to his feet, and gets hit with the PELE KICK~! However, he lands in his corner, where Wall tags himself in. COLE And VX very fortunate to land in his own corner! Heat tags in Tyler to respond, and Wall quickly overpowers him, hammering him to the mat with big forearm haymakers. He then tags in Benjamin, who hammers him on the ropes as the Blonds hold him back. He then brings him out, and executes a Northern Lights suplex! 1... 2... Kickout! Benjamin then tags in Wall back in, and Wall slugs away at Tyler, then whips him into the ropes, but Tyler catches him with a flying headscissors, then tags in Fly! COLE And Fly back in once again! Fly delivers some shots in on Wall, then goes to the ropes and goes for a bodypress, but gets caught. Wall lifts him overhead, and slams him to the mat. COACH BIG mistake by Fly right there, that move's not going to work on the Wall! Wall tags in VX, who picks up Fly, and delivers a punch, followed by a second punch. He then does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle, and delivers a third punch, knocking Fly to the mat! VX continues the Shuffle, not knowing that Fly has landed in his corner and managed to make a tag to Heat...who sneaks up from behind, scoops up VX, and plants him with the COLOMBIAN NECKTIE~!!!!!11111 COACH Oh, no! Kick out! 1... 2... 3!!! COACH Aw, shit! COLE Brains & Brawn gone! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 3rd elimination: Brains & Brawn eliminated by: Colombian Heat & Spanish Fly (Colombian Heat pinned Vitamin X) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ However, as Heat celebrates, VX and Wall attack! COLE Hey, get those guys out of there, they're eliminated! Heat, to his credit fights back, then Fly springs in...but when Wall pulls X out of the way, Fly inadvertantly lands on his partner with the West Coast Pop! COLE And Fly hits his partner! COACH I keep telling you these guys can't get along, Cole! COLE Well, there has been dissention over the past several weeks! Wall knocks Fly out of the ring, then he and VX depart, and the HRs sneak in and deliver the PERCUSSION~!!!!!11111 to Heat! COLE Synth and Logan looking to even things up again! 1... 2... 3!!! COLE And they do! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 4th elimination: Colombian Heat & Spanish Fly eliminated by: Heavenly Rockers (Logan Mann pinned Colombian Heat) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fly revives Heat, who gets to his feet slowly and shoves Fly away. COACH Here it is! It's gonna explode right here, Cole! D*LUX and the Gunslingers quickly jump in to separate the two, who are exchanging choice words. MARV and MEL observe from the corner inside the ring. COLE This is not looking good right now. After several seconds, the two are convinced to shake hands and leave together. Logan remains in the ring, and tries a sneak attack on MEL, who sees it coming and fires into the midsection. He whips Logan across, and executes a backdrop! Logan makes a quick tag to Simon, who gets caught with more right hands. Irish whip into a corner, but Simon gets the feet up and floors him! COLE Simon able to get the feet up, and MEL laid out on the mat! Simon hammers away on MEL, then whips him into the ropes and executes a powerslam! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Simon tags in Charlie Moss, who drops a knee to the sternum, then grabs an armbar, and tags in Synth, who delivers an elbow to the shoulder, then whips MEL into a corner, and charges, but MEL gets the feet up, then scoots over and tags Baron! COLE And the big man back in again! Baron hammers away on Synth, then tags in Jock, as the two whip Synth into the ropes and floor him with a double boot! COLE LOLLERSKATES~! Jock then tags in MARV, who executes a standing moonsault, and covers... 1... 2... Shoulder up! MARV tags Tyler in, and Tyler executes a backbreaker, and covers... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Credit here to Synth Esizer, he's surviving some really big moves! Tyler backs Synth into the ropes, and Synth makes a blind tag to Benjamin. Benjamin reaches in and grabs Tyler by the hair, jerking him down to the mat, then slings over with a body splash! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Benjamin tags in Moss, who rolls Tyler onto his back, then hooks him and rolls over into a BOW-AND-ARROW hold! COLE Submission hold applied! However, he tags in Ned instead. COACH No, look at this! Ned delivers a huge blow to the exposed midsection of Tyler! COLE BIG shot from Ned Blanchard! Ned executes a back suplex, then climbs to the second rope, and tries a headbutt, but Tyler rolls out of the way! Ned is able to tag Simon, but Tyler is able to tag in Jock! COLE And two new men in once again! Jock delivers some big right hands, and a clothesline! Jock then scoops up Simon, and plants him with the TEXAS PRAYER BOOK! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Ned makes the save! Baron comes in and hammers on Ned, and a four-man donnybrook breaks out! COLE And we've got a big meelay in the ring! The referee runs back and forth trying to separate the men, but for his efforts is shoved to the mat by Jock and Simon, and crawls over to the ring announcer. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the referee has disqualified both the Lone Star Gunslingers and the Beverly Hills Blonds for battling in the ring illegaly! Both teams, as a result, are eliminated! COLE Wow, a double-disqualification! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 5th & 6th eliminations: Lone Star Gunslingers, Beverly Hills Blonds eliminated by: double-disqualification ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Several more referees run to the ring to break up the brawl, as all four men are forced to the back. COACH So we're down to four-on-four now! COLE That's right, you've got D*LUX and the Christ Air Express on one side, Team Heyross and the Heavenly Rockers on the other! We pick it back up in the ring as Moss is working over MARV, stomping him on the mat. Moss whips MARV into the ropes, but puts his head down, and MARV rolls him in in a small package! 1... 2... Kickout! Moss hits a quick clothesline, then tags in Synth. Synth signals for the DDT, but MARV backdrops out and makes a tag to Shayne. Shayne picks up Synth and executes a running bulldog! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! Shayne then hits a dropkick on Synth, who manages to roll to his corner and tag in Logan, while MEL tags in on the other side. MEL catches Logan with a Japanese arm drag, then follows with a snap suplex! Logan manages to scoot over and tag in Benjamin, who goes to the eyes. However, MEL reverses an Irish whip, and executes a crucifix! 1... 2... Kickout! Benjamin tags in Moss, who gets caught in an armdrag! MEL makes the tag to MARV, who steps in and joins his partner in a double dropkick! MARV then catches Moss, and executes the JAWJACKER~! Moss goes down, but Logan is able to reach him and tag himself in. MARV tags in MEL, who catches Logan with a flying back elbow! He follows that with a Full Nelson Facebuster! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE What a tremendous match this has been! Logan slides out and tags in Benjamin, and Tyler is tagged on the other side. The two tie up, and Benjamin is able to back Tyler into his corner, where Tyler fires off rights on Benjamin, but takes a cheap shot from Moss. Moss then tags in, and a double-team ensues. Moss then tags in Synth, who hammers Tyler on the ropes. But Tyler is able to lure him into his corner, where Synth runs into the same problem, as MEL tags in following a shot from the outside. MEL and Tyler whip Synth into the ropes, then drop him with a double elbow! MEL covers... 1... 2... Shoulder up! MEL tags in MARV, who comes in and falls backwards with a headbutt! Cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COACH And give credit to the Heavenly Rockers, Cole! They're still surviving! MARV whips Synth into the ropes, but puts his head down, and Synth delivers a kick, then tags out to Moss. Moss charges at MARV, but MARV puts his foot up, then comes out with a clothesline! MARV then picks up Moss, and executes the ACID DROP~! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Synth makes the save! All eight men spill into the ring COACH Oh man, if this match ends with all these guys getting DQ'ed... Suddenly, then referee calls for the bell. COACH ... BUFFER jk, lol. COACH COLE After an eight-man brawl, six men spill to the outside, leaving Synth and MEL. Synth ducks a right hand, and rolls up MEL in a reverse sunset, which MEL reverses! COLE And MEL with a pin in the ring! However, there's no referee, which allows Logan to sneak in and DRILL MEL with a left hand! COLE And there's that left from Logan! The end result is Synth on top, as the referee slides in... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH YES~! COLE And the Christ Air Express is gone! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 7th elimination: Christ Air Express eliminated by: Heavenly Rockers (Synth Esizer pinned MEL) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE And now it's 4-on-2! Logan drags Tyler into the ring, and into his corner, where a quadruple-team ensues. COACH And Team Heyross and the Rockers are looking to make short work of these guys! Moss tags in, and whips Tyler into a corner, but Tyler gets the feet up, then jumps to the second rope, and takes him down with a bulldog! COLE Big move from Tyler Bryant! Tyler inches to his corner, and makes a tag to Shayne! COLE And a tag is made! Shayne hammers away on Moss, then hits him with a dropkick! He then climbs backwards to the top rope, and hits a missile dropkick! 1... 2... Benjamin comes in with an elbow, but Shayne moves, and Moss takes it! COLE And more miscommunication between partners! Shayne grabs the heads of Moss and Benjamin, and rams them together! Tyler then comes off the top, and executes a bodypress on both men! Tyler and Shayne then dropkick Logan and Synth off the apron, and then hit them both on the outside with planchas! COLE And wouldn't this be something if D*LUX could pull this off? Benjamin reaches down and grabs Shayne, and pulls him onto the apron by his hair. He and Moss try to suplex him inside, but Shayne slips over the back, and dropkicks Benjamin over the top! Meanwhile, Logan tosses Tyler into the steps on the outside, then, as Shayne ducks a clothesline from Moss, Logan catches him coming in with a left to the kidneys! COLE And look at that left from Logan, right to the kidneys! Moss follows with an STO BACKBREAKER~! Moss then tags Benjamin, who climbs to the top as Moss lifts Shayne on his shoulders, and executes the SUPER ROCKER DROPPER~!!!!!11111 COACH Wrap it up, son! 1... 2... 3!!! COACH YES! *DING DING DING* COLE And that will do it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 8th elimination: D*LUX eliminated by: Team Heyross (Quentin Benjamin pinned Shayne Brave) SURVIVORS: Team Heyross & The Heavenly Rockers ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ BUFFER Here are your survivors...THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS and TEAM HEYROSS!!!!! COLE Well, give D*LUX a lot of credit, faced with just them against four, they gave it their all, but the odds were just too much! COACH I told you, Cole, no one was going to be able to put this team down! COLE Well, on this night anyway, you were right! Team Heyross and The Heavenly Rockers, the sole survivors! OAOAST HeldDOWN~! THE THANKSGIVING WEEKEND TRADITION RETURNS November Reign SUNDAY NIGHT LIVE ON PAY-PER-VIEW! NEXT ON TSM A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving

Left spaces for the World and Tag Title matches.

THE FOLLOWING PROGRAM IS INTENDED FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY PRESENTED IN HD ANGLESAULT Good evening. Tonight, we are just ten nights away from November Reign 2007, our annual Thanksgiving tradition in the OAOAST. And the Thanksgiving tradition will continue next week, with two big main-events. Not only will we have our traditional Ten Team Thanksgiving Survivor Series Rules Match-up, but also the six participants in the Triple Decker Cage Match at November Reign will be in the same ring at the same time. It will be Landon Maddix, teaming up with Tha Puerto Rican and current OAOAST Heavyweight Champion Stephen Joseph Popick, to take on the team of Zack Malibu, Todd Cortez and Bohemoth! ANGLESAULT On the subject of November Reign, there has been a slight change to the card. On the request of Leon Rodez, the traditional Survivor Series match featuring The Heavenly Rockers and The Beverly Hills Blonds will now see The Silky Smooth One teaming with fellow 6-Man Tag Team Champion Tyler Bryant and The Lone Star Gunslingers. In an effort to make up for their late substitution, The Love Doctors will also be in Survivor Series action, but now be on opposing teams to Enterprise members Theodore Moneymaker and Christian Wright, with team-mates to be announced in due course. ANGLESAULT As for now though, Denver, Colorado... prepare to be HeldDOWN~! LAST WEEK The seizure inducing opening set to “Party Like a Rockstar”! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! B O O M ~! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" LIVE! Denver, Colorado COLE We are over a week away from the Thanksgiving weekend tradition, November Reign, live exclusively on pay-per-view. As you just saw, it will be headlined by a Triple Decker Cage match! The question is, Coach, will Stephen Joseph go in as the champion? Because later tonight, per Anglesault’s order, he must DEFEND the OAOAST Championship against a man from his past who also happens to be a former World titleholder! COACH The possibilities are endless. Stephen Joseph has made a lot of enemies in his time in the OAOAST, hence the “Most Hated Man” moniker, but you gotta feel for the guy, Michael Cole. He’s the latest victim of that tyrannical dictator Anglesault. Every month AS keeps finding new ways to abuse his power. Quite frankly, it sickens me. COLE That’s not the only title bout on the program, ladies and gentlemen. You'll also see Sandman9000 defend the Heartland title against Reject! COACH In addition to that, the recently liberated Alix Maria Spezia will be in action. We’ll also hear from the Lone Star Gunslingers for the first time since their return on Reel Talk. That’s right. Reel Talk makes its HeldDOWN~! debut tonight! COLE But coming up right now… Well, you're going to love this. Let's go up to the ring.