Tony149

We're backstage, where Dan Black, in an appropriately black suit, strides down a corridor looking purposeful. He turns a corner and enters a door. The camera follows him in. Black turns to it: BLACK Hey! This isn't for you to see. A nervous cameraman speaks up. "Er, actually, we have full access to film every part of the arena tonight." BLACK You little bastard. I should- "We're also regular guys who can call the cops if you lay a finger on us." BLACK Well, don't you have balls. Come on in, then. I don't have anything to hide. Dan enters a room where Drek Stone and GPX sit at a table. They glare at Black. BLACK So. It's all agreed? Drek looks back at him with a gloating smile. STONE Oh yes. It's all agreed. You'll get what you asked for, Dan. Black also smiles. BLACK I think that's enough to make my point, Mr Cameraman. "But-" BLACK Get out. Before I- The camera drops and cuts out. We return to Sofa Central. COLE Wow! What did that mean? Has Dan Black - has he gone over to the side of Drek Stone and the GPX? COACH But Black T hate GPX! CABOOSE But does Black hate Zack even more than GPX? COLE Hmm. I hope we're not going to see Drek and GPX out in the Black-Zack match up. I'm getting word that we've tried to get Mean Gene Okerlund into the locker room to interview Dan, but Black keeps giving him the Black Out. Anyway, let's go to our next...thing... LIGHTNING CREW!!! A booming voice signals the arrival of a member of the Lightning Crew and the fans boo loudly. "No Chance in Hell" by Bradley Boyds begins as VX makes his way out. Vitamin X comes out on the stage doing the Shane-o-Mac Shuffle and wearing a perculiar looking necklace that is way too big. COLE Is that what I think it is? CABOOSE It's the hubcap off the El Camino!! Brilliant! Vitamin X shows off his necklace to the jeering fans as he enters the ring and grabs a mic. COACH Nice "bling bling" baby! VX points at the AngleTron and says: VITAMIN X Let's see how it turned out shall we? The screen lights up to show the El Camino on cinder blocks, with the windows busted out, large dents on the sides, and the words "Lightning Crew" spray painted on the side. VX is doubled over with laughter that is drowned out by the boos of the crowd. VITAMIN X It's a freakin masterpiece! I've never been more proud of my work before. It almost brings a tear to my eye. (VX wipes an imaginary tear away) I should start my own TV Show! I...what the hell!? The crowd roars as Parka sprints down the ring with blood running down his face and a wild look in his eyes. VITAMIN X Oh come on! Don't be a spoil sport! I did you a favor. Now you can ditch that hunk of junk! Officials hold Parka back as VX taunts him from inside the ring with his hubcap necklace. The fans start a chant of "LET HIM GO!" directed at the officials holding Parka. COLE What did Vitamin X expect? CABOOSE Oh I believe this is exactly what he expected and wanted. VITAMIN X Hey I agree...let the bastard go! If he wants me so badly then let's fight! COLE Vitamin X is trying to goad Parka into making a hasty decision. He can't be 100% after that brass knuckle shot earlier. CABOOSE Oh yes Cole once again you put your brilliant mind to the task and come up with something none of us ever thought of. The officials talk it over and raise their hands to say go at it. One of the officials slides into the ring to ref and calls for the bell. COACH Whoa! We're gonna have an impromptu match right here! COLE Better out here than backstage. I think the officials know they can't control this situation back there. Too many corners for Lightning Crew members to jump out of. CABOOSE Plus Parka is without backup...where's Eddy Kalm? COLE He didn't expect Parka to have a match tonight. I guess he's not here. Parka slides into the ring and goes for a punch, but Vitamin X quickly raises the hubcap and blocks it. Parka shakes his fist in pain as the fans boo. The ref yanks the hubcap away from VX and nearly chokes him on the chain. CABOOSE Hey ref that's choking! What's that referee's problem? VX slides the chain off and the ref goes to toss the hubcap out of the ring. As soon as the ref turns his back VX kicks Parka low and hits a quick spear that takes Parka off his feet. The ref turns around in time to make a count. 1 2 No!!! VX pulls Parka back to his feet by the arm before Armdragging him back down and half way across the ring. Parka tries to get back up, but VX quickly lands a kick to Parka's busted lip and Parka falls flat on his back. VX makes another cover. 1 2 No!! COLE Another near fall and Parka looks bad. Parka's lip is once again dripping blood down onto his shirt and the mat. COACH Looks like he just earned his red wings. COLE What...the...hell? CABOOSE That will haunt me for weeks Coach. VX slaps his face a few times, making sure to make contact on the cut, but Parka manages to fend off a couple of the slaps and get a desparation punch to the gut in. VX doubles over for a second, but he fights right back with a punch to the cut and then yanks Parka to his feet by the head. VX then quickly hits a Snap Suplex and floats over into position for another cover. 1 2 No!!! COLE Vitamin X is trying to end this early to make a name for himself. If he can finish off Parka in short order he would definitely be in a good position. COACH It's starting to look like he might pull it off! VX continues the attack as he once again pulls Parka up by the head and whips him into the corner. VX quickly follows him in with a running Forearm Shot to the face. Parka whips back against the turnbuckles, arching his back in a bad way, and appears to have back pains. COACH Uh oh...seems Vitamin X smells blood with that back injury. CABOOSE You are forbidden to talk about blood for the rest of the night!! COLE For once I agree with you. Parka stumbles out and VX scoops him up and hits a Backbreaker that causes Parka to yell out in pain. VX looks quite pleased with himself as he taunts both Parka and the crowd by pretending to have back pains. VX arches his back and makes a mocking pained face before laughing. Parka stumbles back to his feet and VX runs at him, but Parka luckily ducks and Back Body Drops VX over the top rope and to the floor! Parka falls face first to the mat as the move took a lot out of him. COLE I don't think Parka is quite ready for this match. COACH Do you think he'd actually back out of it though? COLE No of course not. The fans stomp and cheer for Parka to get up and after a few seconds rest Parka slides out to the floor. Parka waits for VX to stand before whipping VX down to the mat by his head with a Swinging Neckbreaker. Parka makes sure he doesn't land squarely on his back, but it still hurts. Parka then climbs to the apron and motions for VX to get back up. VX gets up slowly and Parka goes for a diving Clothesline, but VX side steps him and sends him face first into the guardrail. Parka comes up bleeding even worse from the mouth as some fans retract in disgust. COLE My God he could have broken his jaw! VX stumbles back into the ring to break the ref's count and rests for a second. VX spends all of ten seconds in the ring before exiting again and pulling Parka up. VX then whips Parka back first into the guardrail. Parka yells out in pain as VX comes back for more, but Parka spits a big wad of blood from his mouth in VX's face. Parka uses the distraction to rest for a second. COACH My God that's... CABOOSE What did I tell you earlier Coach!? Parka defiantly waves VX on, who is wiping the blood off. VX runs forward and Parka hits a Drop Toe Hold that causes VX to land face first against the ground. Parka doesn't let him rest as he pulls him up by the hair and tosses him back into the ring. The ref warns the two of them to keep it in the ring, but Parka ignores him. As VX stands the crowd cheers as VX's lip is now busted open as well. Parka quickly kicks VX in the gut and goes for a Vertical Suplex, but VX slips out behind him and trips him up. VX quickly grabs ahold of Parka's arm and wrenches back with an Armbar. He makes sure to wrench back far enough to torque Parka's back as well. CABOOSE Vitamin X wants to neutralize both Parka's ability to lift with his arm and that bad back. Kill two birds with one stone I always say. COLE When do you say that? CABOOSE You just don't listen to me Cole. VX loosens his grip and stands just to drop a hard elbow on Parka's back before going back to the Armbar. Parka tries with all his might to scoot across the ring to the ropes, but VX stands and pulls him back to the center before going back to the move after another elbow to the back. Parka tries again to scoot to the ropes and again VX stands, but this time Parka sweeps his leg around and takes VX off his feet. Parka then pulls himself to his feet using the ropes and looks pained, but hopeful. COLE Vitamin X telegraphed that. COACH Telegraph? Get with the times Cole those haven't been used in years. COLE Well if I said he "telephoned" it I would sound odd. CABOOSE There's no helping that Cole. VX quickly gets back to his feet only to catch a jumping Leg Lariat to the mush, which causes VX to hit the mat hard and worsen the blood from his lip. However, the move also took a bit out of Parka who doesn't go for the cover immediately. COLE He needs to go for the cover! Parka drapes an arm over VX. 1 2 No!! COLE I guess he heard me. CABOOSE Hey no coaching the wrestlers Cole! COACH Yeah, your name isn't coach, mine is. CABOOSE Yeah who'd want a rediculous name like that anyway? COACH Yeah! Hey wait a minute! The fans boo as VX kicks out and Parka slowly reaches his feet with a look of frustration. VX tries to get back up only to catch a punch to the mouth that knocks him back down. Parka knocks him back down two more times before VX finally slides out to the floor to avoid the onslaught. VX spits a wad of blood onto the floor before snagging a water bottle from the time keepers table. He then washes his mouth out and spits at the fans who yell at him. COACH Think of the germs he just spread! CABOOSE Yeah Coach, you wouldn't want to catch cooties would you? COACH Hell no...I heard those were bad. VX spends too much time jaw jacking with the fans and Parka manages to sneak up behind him and plat him with a Bulldog on the floor! VX rolls around in pain and Parka smiles at the blood flow from VX's mouth. Parka mouths the words, "Paybacks are a bitch," to VX before pulling him up by the hair. Parka then hits a Russian Leg Sweep that leaves VX lying and then slides into the ring to break the count. COLE Why does the ref even bother to count? Would he really want to call this match on a count out? These two would kill him. Parka is out quickly and pulls VX back up to slide him into the ring. Parka then quickly ascends the turnbuckles and flies off the second buckle with a Diving Elbow to the back of VX's head. Parka then goes for a cover. 1 2 3 No!!! COACH No dice no dice! CABOOSE Coach please spare us the jive talk. COACH I could talk about blood. CABOOSE Well in that case...what's up my jive soul brother? Parka reaches his feet with a new found energy and waits for VX to stand. When he does Parka quickly springs into action and lands a Fisherman's Suplex. 1 2 3 No!!! The fans are on their feet with the near falls and boo when VX still kicks out. Parka gets up a bit slower this time, but he still has the newfound energy and waves VX on. VX stands and slides back out of the ring again, but Parka hits a quick Baseball Slide that sends VX crashing back into the guardrail. Parka quickly grabs him and slides him back into the ring. VX is up, but staggering around, as Parka grabs him and whips him into the corner. Parka then climbs the turnbuckles and starts a 10 Punch Flurry, each punch landing on VX's mouth. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9...10 (The fans count along) Parka hops down and VX takes a face first dive to the mat. Parka then goes for another cover as the crowd is in a frenzy. 1 2 3 No!!! COLE I thought for sure that would be it! Parka wastes no time in pulling VX to his feet and setting him up for a Vertical Suplex. Parka hits one and then rolls over, still holding on. Parka lifts through the pain and hits another, but this time he rolls back up slower. Parka goes for another, but the pain is too much and VX escapes and slides out to the floor. COLE Vitamin X bails again and the fans are letting him have it. Parka follows him out and VX catches him with a punch to the face, followed by another. VX works himself into a frenzy with punches, a Shane-o-Mac Shuffle, and then one final punch that knocks Parka to the ground. CABOOSE When is Parka going to learn not to let Vitamin X lure him out like that? VX then pulls Parka back up by the hair, scoops him up, and then body slams him onto the ring steps!! The fans let out a collective "ohhhh" followed by boos. COLE That's it...Parka never should have taken this match before completely getting back into ring shape. CABOOSE And for once I agree with you as well. Parka lies on the mat in pain as VX gloats to the crowd. VX then pulls him up, slides him into the ring and goes for a cover. 1 2 3!! No!!! Parka kicks out!! COLE Whoa that was a close one! The ref actually hit the mat, but he waved it off and Vitamin X is livid. VX gets in the refs face as the ref insists that it was only two. Parka strains to get up and places a hand on VX, who kicks Parka to the face and yanks him up by the head. VX then kicks him to the gut before bouncing off the ropes behind him and lands the X Spot (a Lionsault DDT). VX then goes for another cover. 1 2 3!! No Parka kicks out again!! COLE Stay down Parka it's not worth ending your comback so soon. CABOOSE Aww...are you feeling sorry for him? VX then pulls Parka back up once more and hits The Overdose (Double Armed Suplex into a Neckbreaker). The move obviously not only effects Parka's neck, but his back as well as he arches his back in pain. VX makes the cover. 1 2 3!!!! *DING DING DING* COLE Vitamin X did it! We'll never hear the end of this! CABOOSE Is that so bad? COLE What do you think? "No Chance in Hell" by Bradley Boyds begins to play again as VX picks up the discarded hubcap and holds it over his head almost like a title he had just won. The fans boo loudly as Vitamin X walks back to the back holding his "trophy" over his head. In the ring officials help Parka to his feet, but he waves them off and leaves of his own accord. Parka hangs his head as he walks to the back. The fans cheer as Parka exits on his own accord. COLE He just came back too soon. Hopefully he can get back into shape and teach this punk a lesson. CABOOSE Or maybe he'll call it quits?

ANGLESLAM August 28, 2005 SCHIAVONE Fans, we look forward to seeing you at Angleslam. Our last of our Elite 4 pay-per-views until Anglepalooza in January. VENTURA At least we know the main event of Angleslam, Tony Schiavone. Alfdogg vs. Tony Brannigan. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" SCHIAVONE Now, wait a minute, Jesse. It's a possibility, but not set in stone. VENTURA It is now. You know why? SCHIAVONE I'm afraid to ask. VENTURA Because I called it. SCHIAVONE I knew you were going to say that. Anyway, Jess, we're down to our last 5 night tonight, 3 of which involved championships. Our next match will involved one of the men you predict will be in the main event at Angleslam, as Alfdogg defends his Heartland Title. But it isn't just any match, is it? VENTURA No, it isn't. It's a barbed wire ladder match. C.S.I.'s Chris Stevens will meet the current champion Alfdogg, who, in my opinion, is the most underrate World Champion in OAOAST history. I believe Alfdogg's gonna have one helluva week. Let's not forget we still got the Ultimate X match, which I'm personally looking forward to, and the big street fight between Dan Black and Zack Malibu. SCHIAVONE (smiling) Okay, let's send it over to Michael Buffer. As the camera cuts back to the arena, the lights are out, with a single gold spotlight focused on the OAOAST Heartland championship belt. The crowd begins to cheer. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is for the OAOAST Heartland championship! And will be contested under BARBED WIRE LADDER MATCH RULES! Bound for the Floor by Local H hits and Chris Stevens makes his way through the curtains to the boos of the crowd. BUFFER Making his way to the ring, the challenger! From Rochester, Minnesota...weighing in at 221 pounds...the leader of CSI...CHRRRRRRRRRRRRISSSSSSSSSS STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVVVENNNNNNNNNSSSSS!!!!! Stevens makes his way around the ladder in the aisleway, then gets in the ring and looks up at the Heartland title belt hanging some 15 feet in the air. The Wall by Kansas hits and Alfdogg makes his way to the ring, receiving a mixed reaction from the Toronto crowd. BUFFER And his opponent...from Anderson, Indiana, weighing in at 245 pounds...a former Heavyweight champion of the World...and the REIGNING OAOAST Heartland Champion...ALFFFDOOOOOGG!!! Alf slides into the ring and gets face-to-face with Stevens as the referee explains the match to them. HEBNER This match is for the OAOAST Heartland championship. The rules are very short and simple...bring the ladder wrapped in barbed wire into the ring...climb the ladder, grab the belt. There are no disqualifications, you can use the ladder on your opponent in any way you so choose. Good luck to both of you. *DING DING DING* COACH Here we go, Cole! What a great matchup this should be! Alf and Stevens circle the ring twice, and then tie up. Stevens grabs a side headlock, but Alf pushes him into the ropes and knocks him down with a shoulder tackle. Alf runs to the ropes, and Stevens leapfrogs him, then drops down and catches Alf with a monkey flip! Alf pops right back up, but gets caught with a headlock takeover! Alf reverses with a headscissor, but Stevens spins around, flips over, and counters to a backslide, but Alf quickly rolls off and catches Stevens with a headlock takeover of his own! Stevens with a headscissor to counter, but Alf NIPS UP~! then catches Stevens with a savate kick, then comes off the ropes with a swinging neckbreaker! Stevens gets to his feet, grabbing his throat, and is met with a clothesline to the floor! Alf taunts Stevens in the ring as he is on the floor trying to gather his thoughts. COLE Some good wrestling here, as Alf seems to be frustrating the challenger early on! Alf follows Stevens outside and they slug it out on the floor. Stevens gives Alf a knee to the gut and grabs a headlock, but Alf sends him into the post! Alf then goes around the corner of the ring and pulls the protective mat off the floor to reveal the concrete. Alf drags Stevens over and sets up a piledriver, but Stevens backdrops Alf onto the concrete! COLE Reversal, and Alf takes a nasty bump on the bare concrete! Stevens catches his breath, then picks up Alf and tosses him back into the ring. Stevens stops to jaw with some ringside fans, and that's when Alf recovers and pulls Stevens to the apron by his hair! Stevens, however, gives Alf a shoulder thrust to the stomach, then springboards over and catches Alf with a DDT!!! COACH What a move that was by Stevens! Alf got planted with that one! Stevens sits up and wipes the sweat from his brow in a cocky manner, then goes up to the second rope and drives an elbow into the heart of Alf. COLE Elbow straight into the heart of Alf, and it looks like Stevens is going for the ladder now! COACH Wait, he's stopping at the apron... Stevens retreats to the outside, and looks under the apron. He comes out with a trashcan and a lid, which he throws into the ring as Alf is just coming to his senses. Stevens grabs the lid and smacks it on the mat, waiting for Alf to come to his feet. When he does, Stevens smacks him over the head with the lid twice! Alf drops to one knee, but manages to stagger back up. Stevens puts the trash can over Alf, then goes to the top and hits a missile dropkick! He then points outside to the ladder, and cups his ear to the crowd, receiving boos. COLE Alf taking a pounding here, Coach! COACH Indeed he is, and NOW Stevens is going to get the ladder! He makes his way down the aisle and grabs the ladder, then brings it back down to the ring. Alf has slid to the outside, so Stevens sets the ladder down and gives Alf a clothesline, then throws him back into the ring, following with the ladder. Stevens holds the ladder over his head to pose for the crowd, then turns and is met with an Alf front dropkick, sending the ladder into him and knocking him to the floor! COLE Good move by Alf there to buy himself some time...well, he's going to follow him out! This could prove to be a mistake on the part of the champion! Alf makes his way to his feet after a few seconds, then staggers over and falls forward through the ropes, but lands on his feet. He quickly drops to his knee to look under the apron, however...and finds a KENDO STICK! COACH My man's got that look on his face, Cole! Alf suddenly gets that grin on his face, then twirls the stick around and gets back in the ring, meeting Stevens who slid back in as Alf pulled the stick out. Shot to the gut! Shot to the back! Alf raises the stick in the air, then falls to one knee. He gets back up and waits for Stevens to turn around...SHOT TO THE HEAD with the kendo stick!!! Stevens is down and has been busted open! COLE Alf draws blood with that nasty shot from the kendo stick! Alf tosses the stick aside, then grabs Stevens and gives him a belly-to belly suplex! Alf then goes to the outside and grabs the ladder, and slides back into the ring. However, Stevens has landed right by the kendo stick, and as Alf moves in, Stevens whacks the ladder with the kendo stick, sending Alf down and the ladder on top of him! COLE OH! That should turn the tide in this match! Stevens pulls the ladder off of Alf and lays it down beside him. He picks up Alf, and lifts him in a vertical suplex...and DROPS HIM onto the ladder! COACH OH MAN, that's gotta hurt! Look at Alf squirm on the mat! Alf writhes in pain as Stevens plays to the crowd. Stevens then props the ladder up in the corner, and whips Alf into it! He follows with a splash in the corner, but he goes down as well as Alf as his head hits the ladder! Stevens comes up favoring his bloodied forehead, then slides to the outside for another weapon...this one being a BARBED WIRE-WRAPPED CHAIR!!!!! COLE Oh no...this is starting to get REALLY ugly! Stevens slides back in and waits for Alf to come to his feet...then CRACKS the chair right over Alf's skull! Alf is down and bleeding profusely! Stevens lays the chair over Alf's torso, then grabs the trashcan lid and makes his way to the top. Stevens DROPS AN ELBOW into the chair onto Alf!!! COLE The challenger inflicting some SERIOUS damage on Alf here, and this could prove to be a very short-lived title reign for Alf! COACH It's interesting, though, that neither man has made an attempt at going up the ladder! Stevens pushes Alf out of the way with his foot, then sets the chair down. Stevens puts Alf's head between his legs, then hooks his arms, setting up a Pedigree onto the barbed-wire chair! However, Alf gets his arms free and BACKDROPS Stevens onto the ladder! COACH Alf saves himself there, he was about to get planted face-first into that barbed wire! Alf then lays the chair on top of Stevens, sandwiching him in barbed wire! Alf grabs the trash can... BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! Five shots with the trash can to Stevens, who is trapped in between the ladder and chair wrapped in barbed wire! Alf slams the trash can to the mat, and it bounces to the other side of the ring, as the crowd begins to rally behind Alf. COLE And listen to this crowd, perhaps they, too, feel that maybe it should be Alf taking on Hoff tonight instead of Brock Ausstin! COACH Well, Alf's certainly deserving of a shot, but these people can't get him that shot, and Alf knows that. Right now, though, maybe he's showing Chris the error of his ways here! Alf grabs the chair as Stevens is on all fours, and WHACKS him on the back!!! He then puts the chair under his leg and drops a leg on the back of his head! Alf tosses Stevens over the top rope and follows with the chair. Alf cracks the chair over Stevens' head, leaving him sprawled over the announcer's table! Alf chokes Stevens with the cables, then clubs him on the chest, and heads to the top rope. Alf gets his balance on top as Stevens slowly comes to. Alf DIVES... ...and gets CAUGHT IN MID-AIR WITH A DIAMOND CUTTER THROUGH THE ANNOUNCERS TABLE~!!!!!11111 COACH OH MY GOD~!~!!!!11 COLE Both of these men appear to be out of it at this point! Both men lay on the floor in the table wreckage as the "HOLY SHIT" chants ring out throught the Skydome. Finally both men start to stir about 15 seconds later. Stevens beats Alf into the ring, and catches him on his way in. Stevens picks Alf up in the air, and SNAPS him down with a suplex onto the barbed-wire chair! COLE And Alf tastes the barbed-wire AGAIN!!! COACH It looks like Chris is FINALLY making his way up the ladder! Stevens positions the ladder in the middle of the ring and begins to scale it. Alf slowly gets to his feet, then backs off the ropes and dropkicks the ladder down, sending Stevens CROTCH-FIRST~ onto the top rope! COLE Well, as Gorilla Monsoon would say, he'll be singing a few octaves higher in the shower tonight! Alf drags Stevens off the ropes, and gives him a back-suplex. He then lays the ladder in between Stevens' legs... COACH ...no way! COLE This is going a little too far here, I think! Alf STOMPS the barbed-wire ladder SQUARE INTO THE NUTS~!!!111 of Chris Stevens!!! The first row of fans can be seen cringing from the wide shot. COACH ...that goes back to that line about the shower again, I would think. Alf then sets up the ladder and starts his journey towards his belt. Stevens scales the top rope at the same time. As Alf gets near the top of the ladder, Stevens carefully walks across the top rope to get into his range...then leaps off, catching Alf in a front facelock, and twisting to score with a TORNADO DDT OFF THE LADDER!!! COLE Alf PLANTED with a tornado DDT! That was incredible! COACH That was awesome! He WALKED the top rope, SPRUNG off, and caught him off the ladder for the move! Amazing! Stevens gets up and grabs the barbed-wire chair, and waits for Alf to get up... COLE Not the damn chair again! Come on! Alf gets up, and Stevens tosses him the chair...then hits a SUPERKICK, sending the chair into Alf's face!!! COACH This has GOT to be all...wait, he's going to the top now! The ULTIMATE slap in the face, he's going to finish Alf with his own move before climbing the ladder and grabbing his belt! I love it! Stevens scales the top rope, then calls out to the crowd...FROG SPLASH~!!!111 But Alf pulled the chair in the way as Stevens was flying through the air!!! COLE Great presence of mind by Alf there! That one had to have taken as much out of Stevens as it did out of Alf! As both men lay prone on the mat, here comes JUMBO and Jay Richards from the CSI down to the ring!!! COLE Wait a minute, it's the damn CSI!!! Richards tries to bring Stevens to as Jumbo hits an XL SPLASH~!!!111 on Alf and rolls him out of the ring! COLE I'm not the biggest fan of Alf, but this isn't right! After all he's gone through, he's going to be screwed out of his title by three men! Jumbo sets up the ladder and Richards drags Stevens over to it. Meanwhile, Alf has retreived his nunchucks on the outside. He slowly crawls back in the ring. Jumbo grabs him...and gets CRACKED in the head with the nunchucks!!! Alf gets to his feet as Richards charges...SHOT TO THE GUT! SHOT TO THE BACK!!! COACH Alf taking out the CSI all on his own!!! Richards rolls out of the ring, as Jumbo comes to. Alf SCOOPS UP JUMBO~! and drops him with an EMERALD FUSION~!!!111 COACH WOW! Alf scooping up all 330-plus pounds of Jumbo and holding him for the Emerald Fusion! Alf's really on a roll here! Meanwhile, Stevens is at the top of the ladder and is within reach of the belt! Alf gives him a shot with the nunchucks, and follows him up on the other side. Alf grabs Stevens by the hair and rams his head on the top of the ladder, then climbs to the top, but instead of grabbing the belt, jumps over Stevens with a sunset flip, POWERBOMBING HIM ONTO THE BARBED-WIRE CHAIR!!! Stevens flips over to his stomach, quivering. COACH ANOTHER huge move off the ladder! Alf drags the prone Jumbo over and lays him on top of Stevens. He then slowly climbs the ladder as the crowd buzzes. Alf gets to the top rung, waits for his belt to swing his way... and PULLS IT DOWN~!!!!!11111 The crowd explodes! *DING DING DING* BUFFER The winner of the match...and STILL the OAOAST Heartland Champion...ALLLLLLLLLLLFFFFFFDOOOOOGG!!!!! COLE What an incredible match this was! These two men put their body to the limits tonight, but in the end, it was Alf fighting off the CSI and climbing the ladder to reclaim his belt! Alf holds onto the ladder and holds his belt in the air, then looks down at Jumbo and Stevens laying on the mat. COACH ...uh oh, what's Alf looking at now? Alf looks out at the crowd with a smile on his face, then steps to the very top of the ladder...and comes down with the FIVE-STAR ALF SPLASH~!!!!111!11 onto Jumbo and Stevens! COLE That's the icing on the cake for Alf! He's proven himself, at least in my view, worthy of an opportunity to wrestle for the World title he once held! COACH Well Cole, the guy didn't have anything to prove coming in, the way I see it. This was personal, and he got it done! COLE Next up for Alf, the winner of the Hoff/Ausstin match this Thursday on HeldDOWN! If he wins, he'll go to AngleSlam with a shot at the World title! The Wall plays the victorious Alf back to the dressing room.

MATTHEWS: What a matchup we just saw between two great superstars, ladies and gentlemen. And now introducing one of the newest superstars in OAOAST, here is the Black Widow! ”Going Under” blares through the arena, as Black Widow emerges from underneath the ramp… wearing her usual black bikini, with matching panties. She crawls her way to the ring, and slowly lifts her long, sexy left leg over the top rope, followed by the right. The crowd happily enjoys the view. MATTHEWS: Hello, umm…Black Widow. In your debut match, you had, well, a less than desirable performance against Stephen Joseph. Why are you here for this PPV? BLACK WIDOW: Why I here? Oh, you so silly! Every person wanting to see me! Da? The crowd faintly says “Da.” MATTHEWS: Hmmm… do you want to be in contention for the title? BLACK WIDOW: Oh, I haved the many titles already… I won singles and doubles tennis in Moscow, Filderstadt, Monte Carlo… MATTHEWS: No, I mean the OAOAST Women’s Title… BLACK WIDOW: Oh, no no… I am not person for that. I not here for wrestle. If little girls want play game for a title, that is their decisioned. MATTHEWS: This is OAOAST. Why did you join if you don’t want to wrestle? BLACK WIDOW: Wrestle is for barbarian mans, and silly woman. The Women’s Tennis Association told me join OAOAST and get more fans. American fan need to know more of us Rooskis. As you see Mr. Matthew, American people enjoy see me like I am. Do not you like too? *blows kiss* MATTHEWS: (Blushing) Ooh, I guess I can’t dislike that! BLACK WIDOW: Da! Now now, enough of chit chat! Let have fun! Black Widow starts dancing in the ring, and gives the fans many good looks at her goodies. She does splits in the ring, and twirls her hair while softly letting out her tennis grunts… …and “The Lightbringer” from Infector interrupts her mid-grunt. Asmodai and Mephisto walk down to the ring making crucifix symbols, with Lilian walking behind them. Asmodai and Mephisto walk into the ring, and look menacingly at Black Widow, while Josh Matthews cowardly leaves the ring. BLACK WIDOW: Oh my, hello big muscular American men! Do you want to play? Asmodai looks puzzlingly back at Lilian while she looks very angry. Mephisto slowly walks up to Black Widow, looking very menacing. BLACK WIDOW: Ooh, so you do want to play! *blows kiss* I can give you tennis lesson right here. It look like you need some flexibility, you very tense. Only 175 kronur. MEPHISTO: No. Lilian has had enough, and runs into the ring, screaming with her long screeching voice… while Mephisto and Asmodai return backstage looking puzzled. Lilian gets right in Black Widow’s face… LILIAN: YOU DON’T STAND A CHANCE, SATAN IS ON OUR SIDE! (in the most annoyingly screeching voice ever) BLACK WIDOW: Oh dear, you are very rough looking. I see why you are anger. I guess I having must wrestle again. Please, try not hit me hard. *The bell immediately rings, and Lilian goes right to the attack on an unprepared Black Widow. Lilian connects with a series of punches and kicks to the midsection, which Black Widow lazily sells while being forced to the corner of the ring.* COLE: Looks like Black Widow is struggling again… CABOOSE: Everything was great before this beast came along! Go Black Widow! Udachi! Vychnasch! COLE: Are you cheering in Russian? (sigh) *Lilian continues her ill-fated punching barrage in the corner, then finally manages to get Black Widow to the mat with a single arm DDT. Lilian then applies the sleeper hold to further annoy the crowd. The referee checks to see if Black Widow will submit, but she will not let her arm drop once, and flips her hair a few times. Lilian drops the hold, and does a knee drop, and Black Widow shows mild discomfort, with another hair flip. They both get up, and Lilian runs off the ropes and hits a huge spear on Black Widow. Lilian goes for the pin…* … *Black Widow kicks out at 0.57 seconds, as Lilith looks annoyed working with this useless slug. Lilian takes advantage again with a snap suplex, and goes for another resthold, as she locks in a triangle choke. This move bothers Widow, so she pushes Lilian away. Widow throws Lilian to the ropes, and connects with the SLAPS ASS BIG BOOT!... but, Black Widow falls after connecting.* COLE: Not to be mean, but Black Widow is showing she’s greener than grass. CABOOSE: I’d rather see her show her pink. *Lilian gets infuriorated, and starts hitting Black Widow with stiff-looking punches, which brings Black Widow to her knees. Lilian dumps Black Widow outside of the ring, and launches herself off the rope with a suicide plancha!* CABOOSE: No! Someone help her! She’s very fragile! COLE: This ain’t tennis, Caboose… this is OAOAST! *Lilian throws Widow back in the ring, and does her crucifix symbol, signifying that this match may be ending soon. Lilian climbs to the top rope, and it looks like it’s time for the Impaling! Lilian waits… and waits… and waits… for Black Widow to finally get up. Lilian goes for the top rope spear… but misses while Black Widow walks away to fix her panties bunching in her BUTT! And flips her hair.* CABOOSE: What a great counter! *Lilian lays on the mat like she’s dead, and Black Widow looks to the crowd about what to do next. Black Widow realizes it’s time to maybe win a match! Black Widow wraps her legs around Lilian’s head and torques her back in an awkward position. It’s the Spider Web! Lilian just lays there, and the referee raises her arm… It drops once… …and Black Widow lets go of the move, and starts celebrating.* COLE: Does she think she’s won? CABOOSE: Damn that other federation that’s started only one count submissions! They tricked our beautiful goddess! *The referee tells Black Widow the match isn’t over, and Black Widow looks confused… asking what she does now. In her confusion, Lilian gets up and schoolboys the Widow… 1… 2… 2.67.* CABOOSE: Whew! *Lilian takes control again and connects with a Shining Wizard. She sets Black Widow up for the rolling germans… 1 german suplex… 2 german suplexes… going for the 3rd, but Lilian collapses to the mat, grabbing her back!* COLE: I guess the Spider Web had an effect on that. *Black Widow picks up the fallen Lilian, and irish whips her in the corner. Widow with the raised foot choke on Lilian. Then Widow hits a weak powerbomb in the middle of the ring. Black Widow climbs the top rope and begins her tennis serving motion, and she lets out a loud Monika Seles-like “UGHAAAAR!”* CABOOSE: You can play tennis with me anytime, baby. *Lilian slowly gets up, and Black Widow connects with her service-like motion clothesline! Black Widow goes for the cover! 1… 2… 3! Black Widow does a quick dance, then quickly leaves the arena so nobody can try to wrestle with her again.* CABOOSE: Yes! Yes! Widow, I love you! COLE: Black Widow wins in a bowling shoe ugly match.

COLE Folks, what a wild night it's already been, and we've got a whole lot more left for you, including what should be a wild match for the OAOAST World Title. But right now, we're all set for our #1 contender's match: Hoff taking on CSI's Brock Ausstin. COACH Aww, this should be a hot one, playas, between two guys who have never faced off. COLE We know the history between Hoff and Chris Stevens, but so far the big man has steered clear of his nemesis' faction. That all changes tonight. CABOOSE Yes, and furthermore, there's only been a handful of times that Hoff has faced someone more powerful than he is. I think this is one of those times. It should be interesting. The house lights go down and "Punishment" by BIOHAZARD kicks in. The boo-birds come out as Brock Ausstin steps onto the stage. COLE Good lord, what a physique on that man! CABOOSE Settle down, Cole. You're drooling. Brock does the HAPPY HAPPY HOSS DANCE~ on the stage, then heads down the ramp, cursing at the occassional fan as he does. COACH Brock does look good tonight, playas, and you know he's got to be in a good mood. Chris Stevens finally made good on his word. COLE Chris Stevens delivered in a big way, and we saw he and Brock make amends earlier. For the first time in a month, all seems to be well in the CSI camp. Brock hops onto the ring apron, and fireworks shoot off from the ring posts. Brock steps through the ropes and raises his arms, letting off a guttural scream. CABOOSE Indeed, and tonight, all of CSI have big opportunities. Chris Stevens gets a shot at the Heartland Title, and Jay Richards is in the Ultimate X match. COACH Well what about Jumbo? CABOOSE I'm sure he's the "Playstation Champion" or something. Brock's theme dies down, and the chants already fill the air. "HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF!" CUE: "Black" *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM~!* And the fans EXPLODE as Hoff steps onto the stage!! COLE THERE HE IS!! The number one contender!! Hoff looks around him before heading down the aisle, eyes locked on Brock Ausstin. Brock grins a big, goofy hoss grin as Hoff keeps his gaze focused, shouting up at Brock as he makes it to the ring. COLE Hoff looks ready for this contest. He looks pumped! Hoff steps into the ring and points at Brock, causing the monster to take a few steps toward Hoff. Referee Charles Robinson holds him off, and Hoff takes the opportunity to climb up the near corner and throw his fist into the air, soaking in the crowd's reaction. COACH These guys are rarin' to go, guys! I can't wait! Hoff climbs off of the ropes...and Brock BLOWS past Robinson and nails Hoff from behind!! COLE HEY! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Little Naitch calls for the bell as Brock starts pounding on Hoff's back with vicious forearm shots. *ding ding ding ding ding* COLE Come on! This isn't right! CABOOSE I like it. Brock hammers down on Hoff, drawing the ire of the Toronto crowd. COACH You'd think these Bizarro-land Canadians would hate Hoff. CABOOSE You'd think everyone would. Hoff falls to his knees, and Brock grabs him from behind by the hair. Robinson warns him about the tactic, but Brock brushes past him, pulling Hoff to the center of the ring. Brock, still holding Hoff, rears back and throws a HUGE clothesline that sends the big man down! Hoff lands hard on his back, and Brock steps on his chest, raising his arms into the air. Robinson gets down to make the count, but Hoff rolls free before even the one. COLE Now come on. Brock had better take Hoff more seriously than that! CABOOSE Why? He's in control. He can do whatever he wants! Brock picks Hoff up and whips him into the ropes. Hoff comes off and ducks a clothesline, then hits the strands and comes off the far side! Brock turns around, and catches Hoff with a SIDEWALK SLAM! The fans "oooh" as Hoff hits hard, and Brock leans into a lacquidasical cover...and Hoff kicks out at two. COACH Gotta admit, Brock has taken the advantage he gained in the beginning of this match and ran with it! Brock gets up and pulls Hoff up with him. The man-ster grabs Hoff by the head and neck and throws him into a neutral corner. Hoff's back hits the buckles, and he collapses in, allowing Brock to back up before lowering his shoulder and charging in, SPEARING Hoff in the corner! The fans boo as Brock backs up, thrusting his shoulder again and again into the ribs of the Future. COACH Heh heh, thrusting. Ausstin grabs Hoff's arm and whips him out....but holds on, spinning Hoff and throwing him HARD back into the buckle! Hoff lets out a painful-sounding groan as he hits, and with a smirk Brock whips him cross-corner. Hoff collapses in the far corner, and Brock charges in head-first...but Hoff gets a boot up!! COLE There we go! The fans come alive as Brock stumbles backwards, holding the top of his head. Hoff steps out of the corner, but Brock turns around and grabs Hoff, driving him back into the buckles! Brock again lowers his shoulder, and rams it into the ribs of Hoff! CABOOSE Good ring presence there by Brock to catch Hoff before he could get any momentum started. Brock pulls Hoff out of the corner by the hair, dragging him to the center of the ring before throwing his arm over Hoff's head. Brock hooks Hoff up and hoists him, dropping him with a vertical suplex. The impact shakes the ring, and Brock crawls over into a cover. ONE, TWO, but Hoff kicks out in time. Brock remains unfazed, again pulling Hoff to his feet. Brock grabs Hoff and presses him high overhead, setting flashbulbs off across the crowd! COLE What power from Brock Ausstin! Brock turns around for the crowd, taking in their reaction before pushing Hoff up and letting him fall face-first to the canvas! Brock turns around, rolling Hoff onto his back before making the cover! ONE! TWO! THR--NO!! Hoff kicks out!! COACH Well playas, as dominant as Brock has been, he can't seem to put Hoff away! COLE Yeah, but Hoff is only human. He can only take so much. He NEEDS to swing the momentum, somehow. Brock looks up at Robinson, pissed, but the ref holds up two fingers. Brock turns back to Hoff, pulling him up by the hair, but Hoff fires a forearm! Brock is stunned, allowing Hoff to throw another shot, but this time Brock DRILLS him with a knee to the gut, stopping Hoff's momentum cold! Brock takes the opportunity to whip Hoff into the ropes, but the big man reverses and sends Ausstin in! COLE Is this the opening Hoff needed? Brock comes off the ropes, and Hoff throws a clothesline, but Brock ducks it! Brock keeps running-- right into a back elbow! The fans cheer as Hoff grabs a dazed Brock by the arm and whips him, but Brock reverses and sends Hoff into the ropes! Hoff comes off...and NAILS Brock with a diving clothesline!! "YEEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Brock drops to the canvas, and Hoff rolls up to his feet, ROARING as he begs Brock on! Hoff waves his foe up, and Brock finds his feet. He turns...into a HUGE right hand from Hoff! Another big right hand! Another! ANOTHER! ANOTHER!! COLE Hoff has just caught fire! Brock stumbles back into the ropes, and Hoff rears back, pointing at Brock before delivering one last HUGE right hand to the temple, knocking Brock backwards and over the top rope!! Brock lands hard on the protective mats outside and climbs to his hands and knees, shaking the cobwebs free! "HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF! HOFF!" Brock gets to his feet, and looks up...just in time to see Hoff FLYING over the top rope! The fans cheer-- but the cheers are silenced as Brock catches Hoff!! COACH DAYUM~! Brock lets out a war cry as he charges with Hoff in his arms, ramming Hoff's back into the steel ring post!! Brock lets Hoff drop, and the big man falls to the floor! COLE Well what a great opening for Brock, and you've got to be impressed by his power! CABOOSE Absolutely. So far, besides one flurry of offense, this match has been all Brock Ausstin. Brock picks Hoff up by the hair and RAMS his head into the ring apron! Hoff bounces backwards, leaning on the guardrail. The fans reach out and touch their hero as Robinson slides out of the ring and gives Brock a verbal warning. CABOOSE Aw, come on, Charles! It's all legal on the outside! Robinson points to the ring, and Brock begs off, relenting. The man-ster grabs Hoff and rolls him into the ring, sliding in behind him and laying into a lateral press. Robinson makes the count, but again, Hoff is out at two. COLE Well Brock is in control, he has Hoff hurt. All he really has to do is put him away. COACH I think he wants to do just that! A cry goes up from the audience as Brock signals for the end! The CSI heavy hitter pulls Hoff up by the hair, then lifts him onto his back with a fireman's carry!! The fans hit their feet! COLE The F-Stunner-5! This one will be over! CABOOSE We'll have a new #1 contender! Thank the Lord!! Brock yells as he lifts Hoff up, SPINS him...but Hoff lands on his feet!! Brock throws a wild clothesline, but Hoff ducks and Brock's momentum carries him around! Hoff grabs him by the waist, and hits a GERMAN SUPLEX! The bridge!! ONE! TWO! NO!!!! Brock bridges out of the pinning predicament! Hoff lets go and the two men roll to their feet! Brock is up first and charges, but Hoff grabs him by the waist and hits an overhead BELLY-TO-BELLY!! Brock goes flying across the ring! The fans are going BANANA as Hoff gets to his feet, begging Brock on!! COLE Look at Hoff go! Brock uses the corner ropes to pull himself up, and throws a WILD haymaker, ducked by Hoff, who then SLAPS the taste out of Brock's mouth! The fans go wild as Hoff grabs Brock by the shoulders and shoves him into the buckle, and then fires off a right hand! Another! Another! Brock reels, and Hoff whips him across the ring! Brock hits chest-first, and stumbles back a step...only to be flattened with a STINGER SPLASH!! Brock crumples into the corner, and Hoff spins him around so he faces the ring. COACH The big man is unstoppable! COLE I think it's fair to say the momentum has swung! CABOOSE @#$% Hoff lifts Brock onto the top turnbuckle pad, then climbs up onto the bottom rope! Hoff lifts Brock, all the way onto the top rope, then scales up after him! Hoff climbs to the second...no, to the TOP rope, and hooks Brock up! Hoff rears back...and hits the SUPERPLEX!! COLE Good lord! Superplex off the top rope! This one is finished! Hoff rolls over and lays into a cover! Robinson with the count! ONE!! TWO!! NO!!!!! Brock kicks out!! COLE Wow, I can't believe Brock kicked out of that! CABOOSE Oh yeah, you know it, Michael. Brock is on his way to the main event at Angleslam. Hoff gets up slowly, looking across the screaming crowd. Hoff nods, feeling the momentum as he picks Brock up, but Brock snatches Hoff around the waist and HURLS him overhead with a belly-to-belly throw!! COACH WHOA~! Where did that come from?! The fans jeer as Brock gets to his feet, shaking his head in an attempt to clear his mind. Brock spies Hoff and stalks over to him, pulling him up by the hair. Brock whips Hoff into the ropes, and catches him coming off with a BEARHUG!! COLE Oh, no! Brock Ausstin's debilitating bearhug! Everyone knows, when a hoss locks this on you, it's certain doom! CABOOSE (nodding) Rule of wrestling #14. Brock shakes Hoff like a rag doll, trying to squeeze the life out of him, but Hoff grabs Brock's arms with his hands! COLE What the...is he...is he trying to pry Brock Ausstin's arms apart?!? CABOOSE What?! No @#$% way. No way he can...can he? Brock's eyes go wide as Hoff STRAINS, his muscles going tense as he tries to pull Brock's arms apart!! Brock shakes Hoff....but Hoff stays on him, pulling...and pulling....and pulling....and HOFF GETS THE ARMS APART! The crowd EXPLODES!! COLE OH MY GOD! CABOOSE No way that just happened. COACH I know I've already said it once this match...but DAYUM~! Brock looks positively shocked, allowing Hoff to kick him in the midsection! Brock doubles over, and Hoff scores with a DDT! Hoff goes for the cover! ONE! TWO! NO!!!! Brock barely gets a shoulder up! Hoff rolls to his feet...and the fans BOO?! COLE WAIT A MINUTE! Here comes Stevens!! Indeed, Chris Stevens comes jogging down the aisle. Stevens slows as he gets to the ring calling up to Hoff. Hoff turns...and immediately makes a break for his arch-rival!! Hoff tries to dive through the ropes, but Robinson grabs him by the midsection and holds him back!! COACH Wow, not bad power from the ref there, either. Stevens saunters closer to the ring as Hoff stands upright, screaming down at Stevens from the ring. Robinson tries to push Hoff away from the ropes, then orders Stevens to the back. Meanwhile, Stevens starts jawing back at Hoff, hurling obscenities and threats. COLE Oh man, this is volatile, someone needs to get Chris Stevens out of here! Stevens takes another step toward the ring...but here comes Carl Winslow and OAOAST security! Carl grabs Stevens' arm, pulling him back, and the rest of the force steps in front of him. Stevens gets taken to the back, jawing all the while with the big man. COLE Chris Stevens is a menace. He's a disgrace to this company. CABOOSE You take that back. COLE In any event....hey, WAIT!! Hoff turns back to the ring...and Brock lifts him onto his shoulders! With a roar, Brock lifts Hoff, spins him, and DROPS him with the F-Stunner-5!! COLE THE F-STUNNER-5!! BROCK JUST NAILED HOFF WITH HIS FINISHER!! CABOOSE YES!!! COVER HIM, BROCK!! Brock rolls Hoff over and hooks the leg! Robinson counts! ONE!!!! TWO!! THREE NO!!!!!!!!!!! Hoff gets a shoulder up!! COLE SOMEHOW, Hoff kicked out! I have no idea how! COACH Oh man, what is Brock gonna do now!! Brock gets up, shocked. He looks down at Hoff, anger in his eyes. Brock STOMPS at Hoff, kicking him in the ribs, before picking him up yet again! Brock hoists Hoff onto his shoulders! COLE A second F-Stunner-5, and I don't think ANYONE has ever kicked out of two. Brock lifts Hoff, spins him....but Hoff shifts his weight and turns the move into a DDT!!! The crowd goes CRAZY as Brock's skull bounces off the mat, and both men come to rest on the canvas!! COLE WHAT A COUNTER!! Both men lie breathing on the mat, exhausted. COLE But what could happen now?! What else could....oh no. CABOOSE HEY! All right! COLE Look who's back. The crowd roars in disdain as Chris Stevens AGAIN runs down the ramp. COACH We need better security. After Chris comes Jumbo, who is wearing Carl Winslow's hat. COLE What?! Aw, come on! That's not right! CABOOSE Maybe Jumbo ate Carl. You couldn't tell. Hell, maybe Carl ate Jumbo! COLE That makes NO sense. In any event, it seems that Chris Stevens and Jumbo have taken out our security guards! Stevens slides into the ring, waiting for Hoff to find his feet. Both Hoff and Ausstin start to stir, but Hoff is up first. COLE Look out, Hoff! Hoff gets up, and turns...right into a SUPER--NO! Hoff ducks......and the kick hits BROCK AUSSTIN!!!! COLE OH MY GOD!! Stevens has just laid out Brock Ausstin!! For the second time in as many months, Chris Stevens has taken out his own man! CABOOSE Yeah, but I don't think he meant to this time-- OH NO!! Stevens, shocked, turns to leave....and eats a SPINEBUSTER~!! Hoff drives him down, and the CSI leader rolls out of the ring and into the arms of Jumbo, who helps him to the back. Meanwhile, Brock is OUT. Hoff reaches down, picks him up, and hooks him....in a reverse fireman's carry? COLE What the... COACH This isn't how the F-5 works...fellas.... Hoff walks to the center of the ring with Brock on his back.....and DRILLS him with the AXEL SLAM!!!!!!!! TRIPLE C COLE Hoff just hit the AXEL SLAM on Brock Ausstin!! COACH Talk about sending a message! D-D-D-DAYUM~! Hoff gets to his feet...and SLASHES HIS ARMS!! COLE OH YEAH!! He's not done yet!! CABOOSE This makes me sick! The fans get to THEIR feet as Hoff pulls Brock off the mat! Hoff hooks Brock from behind, lifts him up....holds him..................and DROPS him with the FUTURE SHOCK!!!! COLE FUTURE SHOCK!! THAT'S IT! IT'S ALL OVER!! Hoff gets to his feet, puts a boot on the chest of Brock Ausstin, and raises one fist into the air. ONE!! TWO!! THREE!!!!!!!! *ding ding ding ding ding* BUFFER The winner of this bout, and STILL number-one-contender.....HOFF!!!!!!!!!! "Black" hits as Robinson raises Hoff's hand. Hoff looks down at a motionless Brock Ausstin, mouthing the words "now you know" before climbing up the corner ropes and flexing his muscles for the crowd. COACH You could count to 100 and I don't think Brock would get up. COLE In any event, Hoff is STILL the #1 contender, and he'll face the World Champion, WHOMEVER it may be, at Angleslam! CABOOSE Provided he can get past Alfdogg on Thursday. COLE We now know it will be Hoff against Alfdogg for that shot this week on HeldDown! But what will Brock's reaction be to what happened here tonight? What will he say to Chris Stevens? Hoff hops out of the ring, walking backwards up the aisle as he looks at the ring with a smile. COLE And can anyone stop that man on his way to regaining the World Title?

COLE Well fans, this next match quite possibly could have been for the OAOAST 24/7 Championship if not for a certain Corporate Champ! CABOOSE Oh bitch! Bitch! Bitch! That’s all you ever do! COLE Anyway, this match has quite a bit of history behind it. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez, Tha Puerto Rican’s girlfriend and manager, had been feuding with Ayane Mitsui, Otaku II’s wife and manager, since June, including a match at The Great Angle Bash that ended with Ayane winning by disqualification. Back on the June 30th edition of HeldDOWN~!, Otaku challenged Lindsay to a match against Ayane. Lindsay accepted and that match did indeed happen on the July 14th HeldDOWN~! from the Mall Of America. The License To Pin logo flashes by on the screen. The ending of the Lindsay/Ayane Hardcore Match from the July 14th HeldDOWN~! is shown. COLE That match would wound up being a Hardcore Match, and Lindsay and Ayane certainly used that to their advantage, using everything but the kitchen sink. COACH Either girl could have won that match. But in the end, Lindsay came out the victor thanks to interference from The Lightning Crew! CABOOSE Which was legal, since it was a Hardcore Match! COLE Caboose is right, but that doesn’t mean what happened next had to happen at all! Right after the match ended, The Lightning Crew continued attacking Ayane, beating the hell out of her. Then to our surprise, just as Otaku and Tony Capella were about to save Ayane, Tha Puerto Rican appeared, and did a Pearl Harbor job on the both of them! COACH Then to make matters worst, PRL and Lindsay held Otaku and Tony back, as the rest of The Lightning Crew and Stephen Joseph demolished poor Ayane in the ring! The Lightning Crew basically left Ayane for dead, and you could see the tears coming out of Otaku’s eyes as he carried Ayane out of the ring! The License To Pin logo flashes by on the screen, followed by footage from the July 21st HeldDOWN~! COLE The next week, Otaku was rightfully ticked off, so he called out Tha Puerto Rican, but was instead answered by Thomas Rodriguez! COACH Thomas played a message PRL sent from Miami Beach, challenging Otaku and Ayane to an Intergender Tag Team Match at License To Pin. Otaku accepted the challenge by beating up Thomas, giving him the Bumblebee Clash and the Sharpshooter! The match was set. OTAKU II Tell your boss, I’ll see him…at LICENSE TO PIN! The License To Pin logo flashes across the screen once again, showing the Otaku/Mr. Boricua match from the July 28th HeldDOWN~! COLE Then just last Thursday PRL had Mr. Boricua take on Otaku II in a “warm-up” match of sorts for License To Pin. COACH The giant Mexican manhandled the smaller Otaku, but he also got some help from Tha Puerto Rican! But Otaku was able to fight back, until he got hit with a Corporate Nightmare from PRL! PRL continued his assault on Otaku, until Mike Guerriero and Tony Capella came to their friend’s aid, and took PRL out of the match! COLE Otaku made Mr. Boricua tap out to the Sharpshooter, which he said was what was going to happen to PRL tonight at License To Pin! The License To Pin logo flashes by for a final time, and then the camera cuts to a crowd shot of the thousands in attendance at the Toronto Skydome in Toronto, Canada. COLE You can see the intensity that has developed between these four superstars. And now, Otaku hopes he can get his revenge against PRL and Lindsay for what they did to Ayane two weeks ago! The question is “can he do it?” because not only does Otaku have to go through PRL and Lindsay, but Popick, and quite possibly The Lightning Crew! It’s time for our next match at License To Pin, an Intergender Tag Team Match, with “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez taking on Otaku II and Ayane Mitsui! The lights go down. A Puerto Rico flag appears on the AngleTron. In big, white blocky letters the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them: *THE CHAMP IS HERE!* With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and “Know Your Role ‘99” starts playing, which causes the crowd to start booing. PR is heard saying, “THE CHAMP IS HERE!” throughout the song, while smoke fills the entrance, and the lights flicker on and off. After a few seconds, three figures come out through the smoke. “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican, his girlfriend, Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez, and his manager and “Career Consultant” Stephen Joseph Popick. The boos get louder. PRL adjusts his sunglasses and looks at the crowd with a smirk on his face. He has his right arm over Lindsay’s shoulder, and is carrying the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt with his left arm. PRL looks at Popick and Lindsay, who also have smirks on their faces, and starts walking to the ring. *DING DING DING* MICHAEL BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen, the next match at License To Pin is an Intergender Tag Team Match, scheduled for one fall with a sixty-minute time limit. Introducing first, coming to the ring at this time. Accompanied to the ring by OAOAST Corporate Member Stephen Joseph Popick, from San Juan, Puerto Rico. At a total combined weight of 405 lbs. The team of Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez, AND the One And Only AngleSault Thread Twenty-Four/Seven Champion, “The Corporate Champion” THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO RICCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!! “Know Your Role ‘99” continues playing as PRL, Popick, and Lindsay continue walking to the ring. PRL stops to jaw with some fans. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” P.R. gets on the ring apron, and sneers at the crowd. Popick holds the ropes, and Tha Puerto Rican and Lindsay Gonzalez enter the ring. PRL spins around, soaking in the boos of the crowd. Tha Puerto Rican does the HBK pose next to Lindsay while pyro goes off behind them. The crowd continues booing loudly. PRL heads to the second rope, and raises the 24/7 Championship belt. He then heads to a second turnbuckle, and raises the 24/7 Championship belt again. P.R. hits a third turnbuckle, and raises the belt while “smelling the electricity” a’la The Rock. PRL does the same Rock pose on a fourth turnbuckle receiving boos the entire time. COLE Tha Puerto Rican and Lindsay are ready for this match. I am sure Otaku is ready, but what I would like to know is if Ayane is ready. She cannot be 100% after two weeks. CABOOSE You’re right Cole. She’s probably at 10%, or even 5%. Hopefully, she’ll be at 1%! COACH That’s nice, Caboose. Real nice. CABOOSE Oh bite me, horn dog! PRL is off the ropes, wearing his Puerto Rico flag facepaint, and removes his sunglasses and earring along with his HBK-like entrance attire. The lights go back in the arena, while PRL chats with Popick and Lindsay. “Know Your Role ‘99” dies down, and is replaced by “Ashburn” by Hikari. Sky blue lights around the arena turn on and off, while the crowd cheers. Otaku II and Ayane Mitsui come out as the singer finishes the first verse. They play to the crowd, and then jog to the ring, playing to the crowd the entire time. BUFFER And their opponents. Coming to the ring at this time. From Boston, Massachusetts. At a total combined weight of 325 lbs. The team of Ayane Mitsui, and OTAKKKKKKKKUUUUUUUUUUU TWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! COLE What an ovation from the thousands of fans in the Toronto Skydome! We may be in for quite the fight! CABOOSE Oh, I don’t know. Otaku and Ayane have never met a team as impressive as PRL and Lindsay. Those two will do anything, and I mean ANYTHING to win. And let’s not forget, Stephen Joseph Popick is in their corner. This is going to get pretty interesting! Otaku II and Ayane enter the ring. They pose for the fans to loud cheers. Otaku gets on a turnbuckle, and raises his fists with a smile on his face. Otaku gets off the turnbuckle and stares a hole into PRL as “Ashburn” by Hikari dies down. PRL, Popick, and Lindsay stand in one corner, getting ready, as does Ayane and Otaku II. Lindsay removes her leather jacket and hands it over to one of the ringcrew members. PRL gives the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt over to Popick. Ayane will be going first for her team. The crowd is already chanting “P.R. SUCKS!” COLE The rules of an Intergender Tag Match are that the men can mix with the women. So, just because Ayane is in the ring doesn’t mean that Lindsay has to be in also, which could be a problem for Ayane. COACH I sure hope Ayane is prepared for this. It was just two weeks ago that The Lightning Crew attacked her. I seriously doubt that she is 100%. She’s probably at 45% by now! CABOOSE Well, she knows what she is getting into, so if she gets hurt, I won’t pity her. She took the risk. PRL gets a high five from Popick, who then leaves the ring. Referee Charles Robinson checks on the members of the two tag teams. Finally, he calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* INTERGENDER TAG TEAM MATCH “THE CORPORATE CHAMPION” THA PUERTO RICAN & MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ (with Stephen Joseph Popick) VS. OTAKU II & AYANE MITSUI PRL and Lindsay are still discussing who will go first. Charles Robinson tells them to pick somebody quickly. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez gives PRL a kiss on the lips, and exits the ring. Ayane eyes PRL with ANGER~! on her face. COLE We start the match with PRL and Ayane. Ayane is now standing toe-to-toe with the leader of The Lightning Crew, the group that attacked her two weeks ago! PRL and Ayane stare at each other from opposite corners of the ring. PRL has a smirk on his face, while Ayane is serious. Otaku slaps the top turnbuckle pad, which leads to the crowd clapping their hands in unison. PRL gets on the top rope and poses, but gets loud boos. COACH Looks like we know whom the crowd favors. COLE I doubt there are any Lightning Bolts in this arena. CABOOSE There are Lightning Bolts in every arena! Tha Puerto Rican has a nationwide following. PRL gets off the top rope, and goes back to staring at Ayane. The two competitors circle each other, the crowd cheering the entire time. PRL lunges at Ayane, but then backs off. PRL and Ayane circle each other again, with PRL winking at Ayane. COLE Is PRL trying to hit on Ayane? PRL blows a kiss at Ayane, and then the two lockup. PRL grabs Ayane from behind, but Ayane reverses, and tries for a Full Nelson, however, PRL reverses that into a Full Nelson of his own, but Ayane reverses THAT into another Full Nelson, BUT PRL reverses that into his own Full Nelson. Mitsui grabs PRL’s head, and takes him down with a snapmare. PRL and Ayane both get back up. Tha Puerto Rican licks his lips, which disgusts Ayane and the crowd. Ayane responds with a SLAP to PRL’s face! COLE Ouch! That’s got to hurt him! Ayane continues her assault by punching PRL in the face repeatedly. Mitsui knees PRL in the stomach, and then hits him with the CLUBBERIN’~! THEY BE CLUBBERIN’~! forearms. Suddenly, P.R. grabs Ayane by her shorts and throws her out of the ring! Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez heads over to where Ayane landed, and leaps off the ring apron with a double axehandle, HOWEVER, Ayane is one step ahead, and punches Lindsay in the stomach as she lands, which causes her to do a somersault onto the floor! COACH Well, so much for that. PRL heads out of the ring to attack Ayane, but Ayane beats on PRL instead. Ayane grabs PRL, and whips him into Lindsay! The two collide, and fall to the floor! COLE Ayane Mitsui has just taken out Tha Puerto Rican and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez! CABOOSE Oh come on! She was just lucky! Her luck is going to run out soon, I can feel it! Ayane throws The Corporate Champ back into the ring. PRL tries to crawl to his corner, but Mitsui grabs him, and takes him over to her corner where she tags in Otaku II. Ayane holds onto PRL, and slams his face on a turnbuckle pad. Otaku beats on Tha Puerto Rican in the corner, and then Irish whips him into the opposite corner. PRL hits the turnbuckle chest first. Otaku follows with a reverse neckbreaker! Otaku covers PRL. 1… 2… PRL kicks out! Otaku grabs PRL, and takes him to his corner, where he tags in Ayane again. Right after Otaku gives PRL a suplex, Ayane leaps off the top and onto Tha Puerto Rican with a splash! COLE Great move from Ayane! Here’s the cover! 1… 2… Lindsay pulls Ayane off of Tha Puerto Rican! CABOOSE The only woman allowed to lie on top of PRL is Lindsay! Lindsay is just making sure of that! Ayane kicks Tha Puerto Rican in the back of his neck. Ayane Mitsui grabs Tha Puerto Rican and tags in Otaku II. Ayane Irish whips PRL into the ropes. She follows with a drop toehold. Otaku II drops an elbow onto the back of PRL’s neck. He stops to stare at Lindsay, and then picks up Tha Puerto Rican, and Irish whips him into the ropes. PRL reverses, but Otaku stops before he could bump into Lindsay. When he turns around, P.R. hits him with a dropkick that sends him out of the ring! CABOOSE Excellent move by Tha Puerto Rican! Simply brilliant! Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and Stephen Joseph Popick rush over to Otaku II and kick him in the stomach. Lindsay chokes Otaku II with her right boot while PRL distracts the referee. CABOOSE Again, simply brilliant! PRL and Lindsay are fighting dirty! That’s the way uh huh, uh huh, I like it! Lindsay throws Otaku II back into the ring. PRL kicks Otaku while he’s down, and then picks him up. Tha Puerto Rican chops Otaku’s chest, drawing a “WOOOOOOOOOO!” from the crowd. PRL chops Otaku’s chest again, drawing another “WOOOOOOOOOO!” from the crowd. P.R. tags in Lindsay Gonzalez to a mixed reaction. P.R. and Lindsay whip Otaku into the ropes, and follow with a flapjack onto the mat. P.R. grabs Otaku’s right leg, and Lindsay grabs Otaku’s left leg. Together, they pull them back, which causes great pain for Otaku. Charles Robinson tells PRL to get out of the ring, so P.R. kisses Lindsay and tells her to “whip that boy’s candy ass!” COLE Lindsay Gonzalez is now in the match. Let’s see how she can handle herself against Otaku. Lindsay drops several elbows onto Otaku’s chest. She covers him, and gets a two count. The crowd starts chanting “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” as Lindsay whips Otaku into the ropes, and connects with a spinning wheel kick. She tags in Tha Puerto Rican. PRL tells Lindsay to get on the top rope. P.R. also gets on the top rope. The crowd stands up and boos. Tha Puerto Rican removes his left elbow pad, and throws it into the crowd. He looks at the crowd and then at Lindsay. PRL and Lindsay leap off the top rope at the same time…and both drop elbows onto Otaku! COLE Stereo elbowdrops from Lindsay and Tha Puerto Rican! COACH I don’t think that’s ever been done before! CABOOSE And who was the first to do it? Tha Puerto Rican! That’s who! Charles Robinson grabs Lindsay, and forces her back to her corner. Meanwhile, Tha Puerto Rican stops to pose, garnering more boos. PRL does the “Up Yours!” hand gesture, and then picks up Otaku II. Suddenly, Otaku grabs PR into a small package! However, Robinson is busy yelling at Lindsay. The crowd tries to get Robinson’s attention, but can’t, so Ayane gets into the ring, and grabs Charles Robinson, alerting him of the small package. Just as Robinson gets on the mat to count, PRL escapes the small package. COACH You have to wonder if Otaku would have gotten a three count if Robinson had just counted on time. “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican picks up Otaku, and gives him a vertical suplex. PRL rolls through, and gives Otaku another vertical suplex. He rolls through again, and lifts Otaku up for a third straight vertical suplex. He holds him in the air for a few seconds, which garners applause from Lindsay and Popick, and some of the fans. After PRL does the “You can’t see me!” hand gesture, he walks over to the ropes, and does a slingshot suplex, completing the Corporate Trifecta. PRL covers Otaku, but Otaku gets his shoulder up at the count of two. Tha Puerto Rican picks up Otaku II, and hits him with Rock style punches to the head. PRL spits in his hand, and then knocks Otaku down to the mat with a right jab. He follows by whipping Otaku II into the ropes, and hitting him with a flying clothesline! PRL covers Otaku again. And again, he gets a two count. COLE This could have been for the 24/7 Title if not for PRL just flat out refusing to give Otaku a title shot! CABOOSE Well, what has he done to deserve a title shot? Just because his wife got beat up by The Lightning Crew doesn’t mean PRL is just gonna allow him to compete for his 24/7 Title. You have to earn a title shot, damnit! COLE Just like PRL earned the 24/7 Title? CABOOSE Exactly. PRL shaky leg kicks Otaku, while the “P.R. SUCKS!” chants start up. PR takes Otaku to his corner, and slams Otaku’s head on the top turnbuckle. Lindsay gets some shots in, which Charles Robinson notices. PRL heads to the opposite turnbuckle, and charges forward, giving Otaku II a Stinger Splash! PRL grabs Otaku, and follows with a Russian Legsweep. PRL tags in Lindsay. Gonzalez kicks Otaku while he’s down. Lindsay places Otaku II on a turnbuckle, and punches him in the face several times. “SLUT! SLUT! SLUT! SLUT!” CABOOSE Bunch of cads. Lindsay curses at the crowd in Spanish, and then whips Otaku II into the opposite turnbuckle. Gonzalez follows with a flying clothesline. PRL then runs over to where Otaku is standing, and hammers him with a clothesline of his own, dropping Otaku onto the mat! COACH Lindsay has been training with PRL everyday ever since she hooked up with him two years ago. CABOOSE And we’re seeing tonight that her training has been a success. PRL and Lindsay have done such a bang up job of beating up Otaku and Ayane that it almost brings a tear to my eye. These two DO make a great team. COLE This match ain’t over yet, so let’s just see what happens. Lindsay spits in Ayane’s direction, and calls her a “bruta!” She picks up Otaku, and whips him into the opposite turnbuckle. Lindsay charges…but Otaku puts his right foot up! Lindsay tries again, but Otaku again puts his foot up! Lindsay charges a third time…and is met with a clothesline from Otaku! Both Otaku and Lindsay lie on the mat, so Charles Robinson begins his 10 count. Popick yells for Lindsay to get up. Otaku crawls over to his corner, with Lindsay right behind him. COACH Can Otaku make the tag? The answer? Yes! Otaku II tags in Ayane before Lindsay can stop him! Ayane knocks down Lindsay with one punch. PRL comes into the ring, but he too is knocked down with one punch! Stephen Joseph gets on the ring apron, so Ayane knocks him down, which gets the loudest pop thus far! COACH Ha! Ha! Popick got knocked down by a girl! Ayane gives Lindsay Gonzalez a belly-to-belly suplex. Ayane punches Tha Puerto Rican in the face repeatedly several times, and then takes him to a turnbuckle. Ayane gets on the second rope, and punches PRL, with the crowd counting along. 1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7! 8! 9! 10! Mitsui gets off the second rope, but when she turns around, she is met with a Lindsay Gonzalez spinning heel kick! Lindsay gets on the ring apron, somersaults over the top rope, and does a legdrop onto Ayane’s throat! Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez stops to pose, and to fix her ponytail. She puts Ayane in a ¾ facelock, and then seats her on the top rope. Gonzalez gets on the second rope, and prepares to do a superplex. Suddenly, Otaku II runs over to where Lindsay and Ayane are, and gets underneath Lindsay, lifting her onto his shoulders. Ayane smiles, while the crowd cheers. With Lindsay sitting on Otaku II’s shoulders screaming, Ayane decides there’s no better time than now to do… THE DOOMSDAY DEVICE! COLE Doomsday Device from Otaku and Ayane! Shades of the legendary Legion Of Doom! CABOOSE Ugh, they butchered that awesome maneuver! COACH How so? CABOOSE They, uh…well, they just did! Ayane Mitsui and Otaku II stand over the fallen Puerto Rican and Miss Lindsay Gonzalez. The husband and wife tag team poses for the fans. COLE I think Ayane and Otaku are ready to end this thing! COACH One Golden High Kick or Bumblebee Clash and this thing’s over! CABOOSE (really fast) Toobadneitherofthosemoveswon’tbeseeninthismatch! COACH What? CABOOSE I didn’t say anything. The crowd is hot. Otaku II grabs the dazed Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and punches her in the face. Otaku picks up Lindsay, and places her over his head in a gorilla press slam position. The crowd goes crazy. Otaku does a few pushups while holding the screaming Lindsay. Lucky for Lindsay, Tha Puerto Rican clips Otaku’s right leg, causing him to lose his balance, and causing Lindsay to fall on top of him! Referee Charles Robinson counts. ONE! TWO! THRE-KICKOUT! COLE Close! So close! Tha Puerto Rican brawls with Ayane, while Lindsay brawls with Otaku II. PRL whips Ayane into the ropes. Mitsui goes for a clothesline, but PRL ducks, and gives Mitsui a German Suplex! Meanwhile, Otaku clotheslines Lindsay over the top rope and onto the floor. Referee Charles Robinson has all but given up trying to maintain order. Otaku turns his attention to Tha Puerto Rican, grabbing him while he’s posing, and kicking him in the gut. Otaku places PRL in between his legs, and tries to lift him up for the Bumblebee Clash! However, PRL won’t budge. Otaku tries several times, but Tha Puerto Rican fights back, by tossing Otaku over the top rope and onto the floor! COLE PRL is outside the ring just as Lindsay is coming back in! COACH Who’s legal? Does anyone know? Back in the ring, Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez gives Ayane Mitsui a German Suplex. Lindsay does another German Suplex, and another, and then gets on the top rope. Lindsay sneers at the crowd, waiting for Ayane to get up. CABOOSE Guys, I think Lindsay is ready to finish this match! Indeed, once Ayane is at a vertical base, Lindsay leaps off the top rope, grabbing Ayane with her legs, and going for the Lindsay-Curana! HOWEVER, Mitsui holds on and lifts Lindsay up! She walks around the ring, holding Lindsay up in the air, while Lindsay punches Ayane in the forehead desperately trying to escape. Unfortunately for Lindsay, Ayane still holds on, and drops Lindsay with a sit-down powerbomb! COLE A sit-down powerbomb from Ayane Mitsui! COACH What a maneuver! CABOOSE I’m sitting next to Tweedle-Dee, and Tweedle-Dum. COACH Which one am I? CABOOSE Does it really matter? Ayane slowly gets up, the fatigue getting to her now. Lindsay, too, is slowly getting up. Ayane uses the ropes to help her up. COLE This match has taken a lot out of Ayane and Lindsay. Ayane especially, since we don’t know if she’s even 100%! COACH From the way she’s performed in this match, I’d be surprised if she WASN’T 100%. Ayane is up a few seconds before Lindsay is. Because of this, Mitsui sets up for… THE GOLDEN HIGH KICK!!! COLE There it is! The Golden High Kick! The match is over! Ayane covers Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez while the crowd cheers. Charles Robinson counts! 1…. 2…. 3---THA PUERTO RICAN BREAKS UP THE COUNT WITH THE SAN JUAN JAM! COACH What timing by Tha Puerto Rican! Able to break it up before the count of three! CABOOSE Way to go, PRL! Once again showing why you are one of the best wrestlers in the world today! COLE That 450 Splash, the San Juan Jam, may end up being the reason PRL and Lindsay win this match! Lindsay, Ayane, and PRL all lay on the mat in pain. Popick is frantically biting his nails, slapping the ring apron, doing whatever he can to get Lindsay or PRL up. By now, almost all of PRL’s facepaint has disappeared. Lindsay puts her right arm over Ayane’s chest. 1… 2… AYANE PUTS HER RIGHT SHOULDER UP!!! Popick is shocked! Lindsay remains calm, although she sneers at Ayane for a few seconds. PRL is back in his team’s corner, so Lindsay tags him in. COLE Ayane has a lot of fight left, even though she may not be 100%! She may have not completely healed from that brutal attack two weeks ago at the Mall Of America, and yet, here she is, refusing to quit! You can tell she wants revenge for what The Lightning Crew did to her back on July 14th on HeldDOWN~! PRL nails Mitsui with a knife-edged chop to the chest! He goes back to The Rock style punches, which brings Ayane down. Otaku II is now slowly getting up, using the ring apron for help. The Corporate 24/7 Champion whips Mitsui into the ropes, and hits her with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. He goes for the cover…and gets a two count! PRL jaws with the ref, and then picks Ayane up, and whips her into his corner. PRL charges, and hits Ayane with a clothesline. He then grabs her, and runs with her to the ropes. PRL leaps over the top rope and onto the floor, doing the Necksnap on Ayane! PRL quickly gets back into the ring. Once Ayane is on her knees, P.R. runs and leaps over her, grabbing her neck in the process! The Lightning Shock! “A-YANE! A-YANE! A-YANE! A-YANE!” P.R. tags Lindsay. P.R. whips Ayane into the ropes, and then gives her a drop toehold. Lindsay bounces off the ropes, and kicks Ayane square in the jaw! CABOOSE That’s going to leave a mark! Lindsay lets her hair down and poses. She points to her shirt, motioning that she is going to take it off, and the crowd cheers. Lindsay starts removing her shirt… COACH I see a bra! But changes her mind, and flips off the crowd. COACH Nevermind. The crowd responds with LOUD boos for that. Lindsay does The Lightning Crew Salute, and then drops a knee on Ayane’s back. Cover. Two count! Lindsay stops to get a kiss from Tha Puerto Rican, and then picks up Ayane, and whips her into the ropes. She follows that up by applying a sleeperhold on Ayane Mitsui! COACH Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez has Ayane Mitsui in trouble! Otaku II is now on the ring apron, and is slapping the top turnbuckle pad in order to get the crowd into it. The crowd begins clapping in unison in support of Ayane. Meanwhile, the sleeperhold is starting to affect Ayane, as she drops to the mat, her arms still flailing. Lindsay has her legs wrapped around Ayane’s torso for extra leverage. Otaku II enters the ring, and kicks Lindsay in the head, stopping the sleeperhold, but is forced to return to his corner by Charles Robinson. PRL rushes into the ring, and bumps into Robinson, who bumps into Otaku II, who falls to the floor. CABOOSE Wonderful. Just wonderful. I am in awe of Tha Puerto Rican right now, and I’m not in awe all the time, so you know this is special. PRL gets back to his corner, while Lindsay kicks Ayane in the back of her head. Lindsay tags PRL back in. PRL taunts Ayane, licking his lips. PRL grabs Ayane, smells her hair, and then DRILLS her with a Dangerous DDT! COLE You think PRL gets likes hurting women? CABOOSE Oh come on! PRL is not some psycho pervert that you and the liberal media make him out to be! COACH Liberal media? CABOOSE Yeah, you heard me. Damn you and your Air America and your Michael Moore and your CNN-Commie News Network. COLE The hell does that have to do with anything? Just call the damn match! CABOOSE Frickin’ liberal. PRL covers Ayane. 1…2…Ayane puts her shoulder up! PRL picks Ayane up, and punches her in the face several times. The punches send Ayane to the ropes, where PRL attacks her with The Rock style punches. PRL spits in his left hand, and then blasts Ayane with a punch that sends Mitsui over the top rope! PRL stops to pose, cupping his right ear a’la Hulk Hogan. Except unlike Hogan, PRL receives loud boos instead of cheers. CABOOSE Come on Lightning Bolts! Show yourselves! Make your voices heard! COACH Caboose let it go. CABOOSE I will not let it go! Meanwhile, Lindsay heads over to where Ayane is lying, and kicks her in her stomach. The crowd boos get louder as Lindsay chokes Ayane with her right boot. Lindsay throws Ayane back into the ring, where Tha Puerto Rican is waiting. PRL tags in Lindsay, and then throws Ayane into another turnbuckle. PRL whips Ayane into the opposite turnbuckle, and follows by whipping Lindsay into the turnbuckle where Ayane is standing. However, Ayane escapes before Lindsay can attack, and does a sunset flip on PRL! Lindsay does a dropkick onto Ayane’s back, stopping the sunset flip! COACH That was a great move by Gonzalez. Gonzalez does a snapmare on Mitsui, and then applies a sleeperhold on her. Lindsay once again has her legs wrapped around Ayane’s torso for extra leverage. Referee Charles Robinson checks on Ayane, while the crowd claps in unison. PRL and Popick applaud Lindsay. COLE The fans are trying to get Ayane to make the tag! CABOOSE Too bad it won’t work. Ayane starts to fade, but suddenly gets a burst of energy, and shakes her hands. The crowd cheers get louder, as Ayane gets on one knee. The cheers get even louder as Ayane gets on her feet, with Lindsay still applying the sleeperhold. Ayane grabs Lindsay from behind, and gives her a back suplex to break the sleeperhold! COLE Both women don’t have much energy left. This match has taken a lot of them. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and Ayane Mitsui both lie in the middle of the ring, with referee Charles Robinson doing the 10 count. Ayane begins slowly crawling over to her corner. Instead of crawling over to Tha Puerto Rican, Lindsay decides to crawl over to Ayane to stop her from making the tag. However, Ayane makes the hot tag to Otaku II, who greets Lindsay with a punch to the forehead knocking her down! PRL gets into the ring, and is also met with a punch to the forehead. Lindsay gets back up, and gets knocked down again! PRL gets back up, but is quickly knocked down again also! Otaku beats on Lindsay, and then charges towards her, clotheslining her over the top rope onto the floor! COLE Otaku is like a man possessed! He’s fueled by what happened back on July 14th! He wants revenge for his wife! He was forced to watch it all, and he is using that as motivation! The crowd cheers, since PRL and Otaku are alone in the ring. Popick throws a chair into the ring. Tha Puerto Rican tries to grab it, but Otaku steps on the chair, and punches PRL in the forehead. Meanwhile, outside the ring, Popick checks on Lindsay. However, Ayane Mitsui shoves Popick aside, and proceeds to beat on Lindsay some more outside the ring! CABOOSE What a bruta! She’s beating on a poor, defenseless woman for crying out loud! That’s terrible! COACH Hey, she’s apart of this match, so it’s fair game! Otaku II grabs the chair and looks at it, as if he is hesitant to use it. COLE Otaku isn’t really a hardcore wrestler, so smashing chairs over people’s heads isn’t his forte. Otaku looks at the crowd, who cheers loudly. He then looks at PRL, who is on his knees, begging Otaku II not to use the chair. Otaku looks at the chair again, and decides to use it! COACH But after what happened to Ayane, I’m sure Otaku can change his style a little bit! Otaku places the chair in the middle of the ring, and then plays to the crowd. He punches PRL in the face, and then places him between his legs. The crowd cheers get louder. Otaku II lifts PRL up, and stands over the chair. Otaku II looks at the madly cheering crowd… AND DOES THE BUMBLEBEE CLASH WITH THE TOP OF PRL’S HEAD HITTING THE CHAIR!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! COLE OH MY! Otaku just gave PRL the Bumblebee Clash with PRL’s head hitting that chair! COACH That’s for Ayane! CABOOSE Dear God! What kind of monster is Otaku!? What a sadistic, evil thing to do! He should be arrested! That’s a crime what he did! Otaku grabs PRL for the Sharpshooter, but PRL quickly rolls out of the ring. While all of this is going on, Popick has set up a table outside of the ring. Lindsay and Ayane are brawling near the table, fighting to put the other on the table. From out of nowhere, Ayane Mitsui does the Golden High Kick on Lindsay, who flops onto the table! Popick tries to attack, so Ayane hits HIM with the Golden High Kick! COLE This is just like the Hardcore Match between Lindsay and Ayane two weeks ago! COACH It’s almost like Ayane wants to take us back to that match, and change the result! Mitsui enters the ring, and heads to the top rope. The crowd stands up, anticipating what is going to happen next. Lindsay lies on the top of the table, while Popick is knocked out on the entrance ramp. PRL and Otaku are both trying to get up. Ayane plays to the crowd, and then sneers at Lindsay, before leaping off the top rope… However, Lindsay gets off the table…. And Ayane CRASHES through the table! COLE And Lindsay got off the table just in the nick of time! Ayane lies in the wreckage of the table with a glazed over look in her eyes. COLE I think it’s safe to say that Ayane Mitsui is out of this match. COACH Definitely. CABOOSE HA! HA! That’s great. Serves her right for getting into a match when she’s not at 100%! Maybe she’ll learn her lesson. COACH Ayane may have to wait a little longer to be 100% thanks to crashing through that table! CABOOSE Well, that’s life. You do stupid things you pay the consequences. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez gets up, and heads into the ring. Ayane is still knocked out. Otaku II is about to attack Lindsay, but PRL grabs him, and throws him the chair. Van Daminator! Lindsay high fives PRL, and then picks Otaku up. She shakes her hips to get the crowd going, and then takes him to a turnbuckle. Lindsay whips Otaku II—NO! Otaku reverses, and places Lindsay in between his legs, lifting her up for…the Bumblebee Clash~! COLE There it is! The Bumblebee Clash in the middle of the ring! Otaku has this match won! Otaku II covers Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez, the crowd waiting for the count. However, before Charles Robinson can make the count, Stephen Joseph Popick enters the ring with the chair. Charles Robinson stops Popick, and yells at him. While this is going on, Popick drops the chair in the ring. Popick argues with the referee, while Tha Puerto Rican enters the ring. PRL kicks Otaku II in the back of the head, and pulls him off Lindsay. Popick continues arguing with the ref, while PRL kicks Otaku II in the stomach…and gives him the Latin Slam (Rock Bottom) on top of the chair! COLE PRL just gave Otaku the Latin Slam on top of the chair! COACH And that move took the energy out of Tha Puerto Rican too! Everyone’s out! Indeed, PRL, Otaku II, and Lindsay all lay on the mat while Ayane is still knocked out on the outside. That ends soon, as Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez slowly crawls over to Otaku II, and puts her right arm over his chest. COLE Lindsay is the only one moving! Referee Charles Robinson counts. 1… 2…. 3!!!!!!!! *DING DING DING* (15:25) CABOOSE Oh yeah! The right team won! Woo-hoo! COLE Oh damnit! For the second consecutive month, Tha Puerto Rican has screwed somebody of a victory! Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez gets up, and gets her hand raised by Charles Robinson. BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen, the winners of this match, the team of Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and “The Corporate Champion” THA PUERTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO RRRRRICIIICCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNN!!! “No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Royds starts playing while the crowd boos loudly. Stephen Joseph enters the ring, and helps Tha Puerto Rican up while Otaku II is still lying on the mat. PRL hugs Lindsay and gives her a kiss while the crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” COACH This was pretty much a 3 on 2 Handicap Match! It was because of Stephen Joseph throwing that chair in the ring that led to PRL and Lindsay winning. CABOOSE No it wasn’t. PRL and Lindsay would have won this match anyway. They just won it sooner thanks to Popick. Popick continues holding Tha Puerto Rican up. P.R., Popick, and Lindsay laugh at Otaku and Ayane, and then exit the ring, laughing the entire time. PRL and Lindsay kiss again on the entrance ramp, congratulating each other on their win. COLE Let’s take a look back at the end of this match. The OAOAST Rewind brought to you by Starbucks ™ appears on screen showing Ayane going through the table. COACH Ayane tried to take Lindsay out of the match by doing a splash through the table, but Lindsay moved out just in the nick of time, and Ayane fell right through the table, knocking her out, thus taking HER out of the match instead. Cut to Popick throwing the chair in the ring. COACH (CONT’D) Popick threw the chair in the ring behind the ref’s back, allowing PRL the perfect opportunity to prevent Otaku from getting the win by giving him a Latin Slam on the chair! Lindsay used all the energy she had left to cover Otaku, and got the 1, 2, 3! What a heck of a match! Cut back to current time as Ayane has crawled into the ring to check on Otaku. PRL and Lindsay, both sweaty and out of breath, obviously suffering from fatigue, still have enough energy to gloat over their victory as they stand on the entrance ramp. “No Chance In Hell” continues playing as PRL, Popick, and Lindsay pose, PR posing with the OAOAST 24/7 Championship belt. COLE Otaku hoped that tonight he would get his revenge on Tha Puerto Rican, but I guess he’ll have to wait some more in order for that to happen! COACH Even though they lost the match, Otaku II and Ayane Mitsui put up one hell of a fight! At least they can walk to the back knowing that they almost won. CABOOSE The key word is “almost”. They didn’t win. PRL and Lindsay did. And that is what will be printed in the OAOAST record book, not that Otaku and Ayane almost won! Otaku is now up, just in time to see PRL give Lindsay a big wet French kiss, which further pisses Otaku off. Stephen Joseph Popick, “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican, and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez leave, while Otaku II and Ayane Mitsui start to get up. COLE Well, I tell ya, PRL may have won the battle, but the war between him and Otaku is far from over! CABOOSE He should just give up. There’s no sense trying to beat PRL. He is unbeatable. COACH I think Otaku won’t listen to your advice, ‘Boose. CABOOSE And that is why Tha Puerto Rican will crush him. COLE We don’t know that yet Cole. This rivalry between Tha Puerto Rican and Otaku II isn’t over yet. Not by a long shot.

COLE Up next should be a war...a Lights Out, non-sanctioned, no rules match between OAOAST World Women's Champion Jenny Adams and the woman who is after the $7,500 bounty on her head, Brodie Lewis. COACH To make a long story short: Brodie's been putting members of the OAOAST, both active wrestlers and officials, in the hospital all month, resulting in her being suspended indefinately from this company, all in the name of her path of destruction on the way to collecting the bounty placed on Jenny Adams by some unknown benefactor who we're trying to find out more about as the days go on. CABOOSE ..and after lots of begging and pleading, Jenny's gotten this match tonight. One night only, the OAOAST is washing their hands clean of this situation, as they know that someone WILL be put on the shelf and they don't want to be responsible for it. Tonight...the competitors are out for blood. (The stage lights used for the show are then turned off, and the arena's normal house lights are then brought up) COACH This whole ritual symbolizes that this isn't a part of the OAOAST show that we've brought to town. COLE And just to re-enforce the fact, the World Women's Championship is NOT on the line. We don't have Michael Buffer to go to since...well, he's refused to even be near the ring for this match. So, let's just get some music going. "House of Mirrors" starts up, as Brodie Lewis staggers out to the ring with a nearly-empty bottle of Jack Daniels in her right hand. Brodie's hair is down, as she didn't bother spiking it for this match. She chugs the rest of it down, then tosses it into the crowd, which causes a sea of people to clear way to avoid the glass bottle breaking over their face. Lewis climbs into the ring and stares at the entrance, awaiting for her opponent to enter the ring. CABOOSE Not to use hyperbole or anything, but Brodie Lewis is seriously scarier than a lot of people, male or female, that I've met in my life. "Fly" starts up, but Jenny Lewis doesn't even wait for the intro to end to walk out through the curtain. Jenny ditches her usual ring gear for workout pants and a plain grey t-shirt. She ignores the fans' hands waiting to be slapped and storms to the ring, with her eyes interlocked with Brodie's. She walks into the ring and immediately goes face-to-face with Brodie, as they start to stare each other down and yell at one another... COLE This is going to get real tense...real fast. The referee assigned to this match by the provincal athletic commission tries to get between the two competitors...and gets thrown over the top rope and to the floor by both! The match is on! *BELL RINGS* Brodie and Jenny get right to work, going right into an unbelievable punch-fest. Fists are a-flying, as the fight resembles a bare-knuckle boxing match more than a wrestling encounter! Jenny starts off going after the head, but Brodie gets a brief advantage with some hook punches to the stomach that make a clap/thud-type noise. Jenny fights back by taking her down with a double leg takedown, jumping right to a mount position on top of Brodie and going to work with a series of mounted punches. COACH Damn! Brodie starts to wriggle away, so Jenny briefly repostitions herself to deliver a stiff knee to the left side of the ribcage! Jenny pulls Brodie up by the hair and goes for a kick. But, Brodie catches the leg and forces Jenny down to the mat. Brodie climbs on top of Jenny and delivers a pair of HARD mounted forearms to the side of Jenny's face! Jenny's left eye starts to swoll up from the shots, as she grabs Brodie by the throat with one hand and palm thrusts her in the face, using the momentum of the strike to shove Brodie over, hopping on her back immediately with a back guard. Jenny then goes to work with a barrage of punches to the back of Brodie's head, using both hands while the better-connecting punches make a "THUD!" noise on the back of Brodie's skull. COLE This is unlike anything I've seen out of anyone in a wrestling ring lately, let alone females... Lewis is able to get a center of gravity and balance going so she can get out of the kneeling position and start getting onto her feet, lifting Jenny up into a piggyback as she continues to lay the punches in. Brodie gets to one foot, but tries to quickly to push off with the other, sending both Brodie and Jenny through the ropes and to the floor! COACH If they come over here, I'm running! Brodie and Jenny are up quickly, Jenny gets to Brodie first, grabbing her head and delivering a knee to the face. That dazes Brodie long enough to allow Jenny to send her into the guardrail with a tackle! After that crash, we're able to see that the knee to the face busted Brodie's nose open. Adams transitions right into a series of knee thrusts into the stomach of Lewis. However, Brodie catches the fifth attempt at a knee thrust and hurls Jenny overhead and into the crowd, as the crowd around her scatters. Brodie pushes off of the guardrail to get to a standing position, stumbling around due to the lack of balance after having her nose busted, and then climbs over the guardrail and into the crowd... COLE RUN! Brodie took too much time to get herself together, as Jenny grabs a chair, not even bothering to shut it, and tosses it into Brodie's face seat-first! Brodie actually shrugs it off, then charges forward and scores with a series of punches to Jenny's stomach, causing Jenny to double over and position herself perfectly for a receipt knee to the face. It doesn't bust open Jenny's nose, but it helps the swelling around her eye quicken. Brodie then positions Jenny and tries for a powerbomb onto the concrete...but Jenny slips out behind Brodie! Jenny turns around and connects with a wild right punch that opens a small cut on the back of Brodie's head! COACH Surprisingly, Jenny's been the one who's opened first blood on the bruising Lewis! Jenny grabs Brodie and goes for a cobra clutch choke, but Brodie quickly comes to and gets out with a quick judo-like takedown onto the concrete...but Jenny didn't get over all the way... COLE JESUS CHRIST! SHE LANDED ON HER FACE! Adams went forehead-first onto the concrete, immediately opening up a gash on her forehead. She'd be knocked out if it weren't for her arms being up near her head. Brodie staggers to her feet, grabs a closed chair, and slams it down across Jenny's back! Brodie then stomps the back of Jenny's head once before pulling Jenny up by the hair, revealing a puddle of blood that's exited from Jenny's forehead from the bad fall and revealing Jenny's half-crimson face for all to see, as Brodie whips Jenny into the guardrail. Brodie then charges forward and connects with a running knee strike to the face! COACH Jenny might have scored first blood, but Brodie's scored most blood. Brodie then grabs Adams by the legs and goes for a lifting powerbomb onto the concrete. She gets Jenny up to slam her the opposite direction as the guardrail, but Jenny is somehow able to slip out and land back in the ringside area. She grabs Brodie by the hair, then yanks her over the guardrail with a front facelock. As the blood continues to pour out of Jenny's forehead and turn her face and parts of her hair red, she nails Brodie in the face with a forearm to the jaw, then lifts up the ring apron curtain and pulls out an extra part of the guardrail that wasn't used in the building set-up. Adams then sets it up like a bridge over the actual guardrail and the ring apron, as she turns around to see Brodie charging at her...and Lewis gets backdropped onto the guardrail! Lewis holds her back in pain as she lies on the railing. Jenny gets underneath Brodie and the railing and starts to push it up in a catapult into the crowd! But, right before she can get it up fully, Brodie rolls off to the side! COLE Lewis dodged a bullet! Adams ends up lifting it into the crowd anyway, as the crowd surfs it over to security. Jenny turns around after that, and gets nailed with a brutal Yakuza kick from Brodie! Lewis then grabs the prone Lewis , whose hair has turned entirely red from the blood that she's still losing, with both hands by the throat, off of the ground, and lifts her up in the air in an incredible show of strength! Brodie has Jenny up in her clutches, and charges forward, sending Jenny spine-first into the ringpost! Brodie still has ahold of the double choke and is flat-out trying to choke Jenny Adams! COACH C'mon...I know there's no rules, but this ain't right! Brodie shakes Jenny around by the throat, trying to help her circulation cut off quicker. Jenny drops down to one knee, not being able to stand on both feet...but in a moment of total desperation, she grabs a front waistlock and brings Brodie over with a belly-to-belly suplex! Jenny pulls herself up with the guardrail's assistance as quick as she can, then climbs down on top of it and comes down across Brodie's stomach with a big double stomp! That takes enough energy out of the worn-out Adams that she kneels down and buries her face in the apron for a moment, allowing Brodie time to catch her breath after Jenny's offensive onslaught, and pull herself up. COLE We're not really all that far into the match...and this place already looks like a car wreck! Jenny gets back up on her feet and grabs Brodie by the hair, forcing her head up against the ringpost. Jenny then goes for a headbutt...but Brodie moves her head and Jenny headbutts the steel! Brodie grabs Jenny by the hair before she falls down, but Adams looks to be out on her feet, as blood still trickles out of the wound from the takedown earlier. Lewis grabs Jenny in a reverse waistlock and literally swings her like a sack of potatoes into the ringpost, as you hear the sound of Jenny's shoulder and back thud against the steel! COACH You don't do that type of thing to another human being! It'd be nice if someone sent another referee out here to look over things! CABOOSE Why bother? It's unsanctioned! Brodie pulls Jenny's near-lifeless body up off of the floor, lifts her for a side suplex, then tosses her like a sack of potatoes over the guardrail, into and through a row of chairs! Lewis brushes the small amount of hair that has gotten in her face out, looking out at the crowd in an angered trance. Brodie climbs over the guardrail and takes enough time that Jenny's able to get up and charge at her for a tackle. But, Brodie side-steps and Jenny head-on into the guardrail! Brodie hooks Jenny for a gutwrench, lifts her, and slams her down on her back on the concrete! Brodie takes a second to check to see if her nose is still bleeding, and it isn't. A second referee finally comes out of the locker room to oversee this match. COLE Finally! Brodie goes to pull Jenny up, but Jenny grabs a chair off of the ground and throws it at Brodie's head for a grazing blow. Jenny pushes herself up to a seated position and tries to kick Brodie in the gut from the ground, but Brodie catches her foot. Brodie then yanks Jenny up off the ground by the foot, lifts her, and drives her down onto the concrete with a front spinebuster! The crowd collectively chant "HOLY SHIT!" after hearing the thud that Jenny's head and back make on the ground. Jenny doesn't move after the move, so the referee starts to count her down since Brodie won't pin her... ONE! TWO! THREE! FOU... Brodie grabs the referee, punches him in the face twice, then spikes him down on the concrete face-first by the back of his head! Brodie grabs a chair off the ground and slams it down on his head for good measure! Lewis then goes to snatch another chair, but a near-by fan steps in and tries to stop her from grabbing his chair...so Brodie knocks him down with a wild left hook to the jaw! COLE That's uncalled for! CABOOSE That's what you get for stepping into a wrestler's workzone! Brodie grabs the chair she wants, turns around...and walks right into a jumping enziguri kick from Jenny! But while the kick dazes Brodie, it does not take her off her feet! The bloodied and warn-out Jenny looks on from a kneeling position, as Brodie just stands still, but squinting and holding her neck. Jenny gets up to her feet, with the blood from her forehead forming into dried clumps on her face and hair, and charges at Brodie with a flying forearm smash! But, Brodie ducks underneat Jenny and tosses her overhead, RIGHT on the back of her neck! COACH Good lord! COLE That wasn't really even a suplex...Brodie got up underneath Jenny and flung her backwards without leaving her feet! Brodie turns around slowly, as we can see a bruise forming around her right eye that was possibly from something Jenny tried during her last charge. Adams gets up to one knee, looking barely alive...and Brodie sends her right back down with a STIFF charging kick to the face! Brodie pulls Jenny up by the hair and punches her in the face yet again. Lewis grabs Jenny and lifts her up, charges, and hits a SICK running powerbomb over the guardrail and to the ringside floor! COACH GEEZ! Jenny just lays on the ground for nearly ten seconds before slowly awakening. A third referee runs out from the entrance and runs right over to where Adams lay prone. He asks Brodie if she wants to go for a pin, and she literally growls at him. So, he starts with the count-out... ONE! TWO! THREE! Adams starts trying to reach up to pull herself up with the apron... FOUR! FIVE! Brodie starts to climb over the guardrail, as Jenny starts her way back up, pulling herself up on the apron... SIX! Brodie's back over on the other side of the rail, as Jenny's up on both knees... SEVEN! Jenny's up on one foot...and Brodie plows her over with a lariat! COACH GEEZ AGAIN! Adams lies on the ground, trying to regain her breath. Brodie pulls Jenny up and tosses her back into the ring. Brodie then reaches out into the crowd, grabs a chair, and tosses it into the ring. Brodie grabs two more chairs and tosses those into the ring. Brodie climbs back into the ring and sets up one of the chairs. Lewis turns around and pulls Jenny up by the hair again. Lewis spits in Jenny's face...and Jenny somehow finds the energy to nail Brodie in the face with a forearm shot! The crowd picks up its volume with rising cheers, as Adams reaches back and nails another forearm to the face! Brodie's rocking from the shots, as Jenny takes a second to take a breath with the crowd chanting her name... "JENNY!" "JENNY!" ...then goes for a big superkick...but Brodie catches the foot, pulls her in hard, and sends her down with a headbutt to the side of the head! COLE Skulls aren't supposed to make that sound! Adams immediately goes down, as she starts to lose more blood. Brodie stumbles around, impacted by having her skull collide with another so violently. Lewis shakes it off and pulls Jenny up to a kneeling position, calling one of the floor cameramen to close in on Jenny's face. Brodie then digs into the cut with her fingernails, going in deeper and deeper to open the cut further. More and more blood comes squirting out of the cut, as Brodie's fingers start to turn red from working the cut open even further. You can see fans in the crowd who are visibly disgusted by the amount of blood coming out of Jenny's face! COACH This is barbaric! Brodie shoves Jenny down to the ground again, as she grabs one of the chairs that she tossed into the ring and sets it up. Jenny reaches outward again. surrounded by the puddles and stains of blood she's left on the mat, looking for anything that can keep her going. The chants start up again... "JENNY!" "JENNY!" "JENNY!" Brodie grabs the second chair she threw into the ring and sets it up, seat edge-to-seat edge with the other chair. Lewis then grabs the struggling Jenny by the hair once again, and slowly pulls her up. Brodie stands her up all the way, then slaps her in the face, with the sound being heard by everyone in the building. Brodie then yells at Jenny... "FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!" Lewis slaps Jenny across the face again, as you see blood and sweat literally fly off of Jenny's face. Jenny reaches down...then comes right back at Brodie with rapid-fire, E. Honda-like slaps to the face! The crowd erupts! Adams keeps going with the rapid-fire hard slaps, switching hands with each one, then lays into Brodie with a big forearm smash to the face! Jenny stumbles around, as she has Brodie somewhat dazed from the stiff shots...then connects with a LOUD straight-up headbutt! CABOOSE Where the hell is she getting this energy from? COLE Listen to the crowd! THAT'S where! Jenny nearly falls down from the impact of her own headbutt, definately weary from all of the blood loss. The crowd still cheers loudly, as Brodie staggers backwards. Jenny backs up, surveys the situation, then goes in and grabs a front facelock.The crowd rises to their feet, as they realize that Jenny's rushing in the heat of the moment and is going for the Toledo Destroyer! Jenny hops up for the front flip...but Brodie grabs her mid-move and stops the move! However, Jenny's able to keep ahold of a front choke as she's in Brodie's clutches! Lewis starts to wain a little bit, as the choke combined with a potentially broken nose look to be completely throwing her balance off! COACH Jenny has a chance here! Brodie drops to one knee, as Jenny keeps the choke clinched in, even with the trickles of blood still pouring from her face. But out of nowhere, Lewis comes back to her feet and hooks Jenny's head. She then lifts Adams up in the air, looking to be going for the Orange Crush! Brodie turns around, showing that she's planning on doing it on the chairs! COLE NO! Don't do it! Brodie takes too much time though, as Jenny starts punching Brodie frantically to get out of the move. She then delivers a knee strike to the face...and Brodie lets her down! Jenny keeps ahold of the front facelock and turns Brodie back around, looking to attempt the Toledo Destroyer onto the chairs! COACH This will definately be it! Jenny goes for the flip...but Brodie reverses and backdrops Jenny onto the chairs! Brodie stumbles to her left side and ends up leaning on the ropes, as Jenny rolls around on the mat in pain! Brodie pulls herself together and stands up on her own power. Jenny tries to struggle to get to her feet, but Brodie gets to her first...and delivers a punt-like kick to the jaw! COLE I think Jenny's out cold! Brodie slowly pulls Jenny up, showing her own exhaustion from the battle. She hooks Jenny, lifts her by the head and arm....then climbs up onto one of the chairs...BRAINBUSTER THROUGH A CHAIR! CABOOSE IT'S OVER! IT'S OVER! The crowd erupts in shock... "HOLY SHIT!" "HOLY SHIT!" Brodie quickly crawls to the ropes and pulls herself up with one arm, clutching the other to her side. Lewis gets up to her feet, shakes off her arm that she hurt in the fall, then surveys the wreckage with a demented smile on her face and a shocked look in her eye! Brodie again refuses to pin Jenny, with the referee having to count Jenny out again... ONE! TWO! The crowd's chants fade to another... "JENNY!" "JENNY!" "JENNY!" THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! Jenny reaches out and grabs the middle rope with one arm! COLE There's some hope! EIGHT! Jenny uses every ounce of energy to pull herself up on one knee! NINE! T....She's back up! The crowd ROARS, as Brodie looks in in shock! Lewis charges at Jenny! But, Jenny catches her with a big staggered forearm to the face! Brodie stumbles backwards a step, but goes full force ahead, grabbing Jenny by the back of the head and giving her a SICK knee to the face! Jenny's basically out on her feet, as Brodie delivers a second knee to the face, as you can practically hear a bone in Jenny's face snap! Brodie then gives her a hard punch to the temple! Lewis lets go, as Jenny collapses to the mat face-first! COLE She's motionless! The referee doesn't even bother to wait for a cover this time... ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! Brodie takes a seat on the top turnbuckle, as Jenny's still out cold in center-ring! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! No sign of life from Jenny... NINE! TEN! *BELL RINGS* COLE Well...this was a first. COACH I'm...I'm speechless... Brodie walks away from the ring, not even looking back at the ring. She stops at the entrance, as EMT's and officials rush past her with a gurney, sticks one hand in the air, and makes the money hand sign, signalling that she's gotten the bounty. COLE This just isn't right! The EMT's clear the ring of the chairs, as they need all the space to look over Jenny. She's completely out cold and not able to answer anything they ask of her. She slowly position her onto the stretcher, as the crowd looks on in stunned silence, both from the spectacle that they just saw, as well as how mangled and destroyed Jenny is. One of the cameramen even picks up a shot of two little girls in the front row crying. COACH Wrestling's supposed to be a full-contact sport, but this is ridiculous. They get Jenny onto the stretcher and slowly wheel her out of the building, to a loud standing ovation! COLE She deserves the ovation, but the beating was damn wrong...DAMN WRONG! CABOOSE Settle down, Cole! COACH Let's let the ring crew try and clean up the ring and let's go to something else.... ANGLESLAM August 28, 2005

We go backstage where Vitamin X is walking out into the parking lot. He turns to the cameraman and motions for him to follow. VITAMIN X I want you all to see this. I want everyone here to see the true Leroy Parka. I heard he was going to be backstage tonight and I just had to show you how pathetic he's become. VX talks with a smirk as he scans the parking lot for something. VITAMIN X Aha! There's what I was looking for. VX sprints off in the direction of a certain car as the cameraman tries to keep up. The fans watch a shaky picture finally clear up as VX stops in front of a very dirty looking El Camino with a broken side mirror. VITAMIN X Look at this piece of junk! This used to be a fine piece of machinery and now it looks like something you'd find in a redneck's front yard! COLE This is rediculous. CABOOSE Shut it Cole I want to hear this. VITAMIN X Some of Parka's mexican friends must have found it in his yard while they were mow...just kidding...that's terrible of me. The fans boo mercilessly at VX. VITAMIN X Well you know what this car needs? It needs to be rennovated and I think I know the perfect new look for it. Tell you what cameraman, come back later and see how it's coming a long. Just call me Vitamin Xzibit baby! It's time to pimp this ride! COACH I love that show! COLE My God someone needs to tell Parka what's going on! CABOOSE I'm sure he's watching a monitor backstage. I just hope he doesn't run into any *ahem* "problems" trying to get to his car. COLE What do you mean by that? CABOOSE You figure it out Cole. Hold on...well well, according to the back we might get the answer to your question right now. Backstage Parka (in street clothes) is running down the hallways not caring who he bumps into. A young lady carrying drinks gets shoved aside and yells out "Hey!" as Parka makes his way towards the door. Suddenly Parka is blindsided by Mr. Boricua from an adjoining hallway and falls to the ground in pain. The camera pans up to show Boricua with brass knuckles on his hand. BORICUA No one interrupts Vitamin X until he is done! You're gonna love the changes he's made. Boricua laughs as he steps over Parka's body. Parka's lip is busted open pretty badly and a pool of blood is forming on the floor. COLE I can't believe this! CABOOSE What else did you expect? Backstage with Josh Matthews~! OMG Fanboys screeeaaammm! J to the M Two weeks ago, the OAOAST was shocked with the return of Stephen Joseph to active wrestling duty. After having Cuban Wall attack me in his return interview, Stephen Joseph has once again asked for a few minutes of time, to address his unknown opponent tonight. Stephen Joseph Thank you Josh. Nice security detail. Stevie Heyyy, it’s the Sizzle Jizzle of the OAOAST! What’s going… (We interrupt this interview to umm, tell you about Josh’s security detail. Straight from the WWE unemployment line, it’s the bWo, wearing “Josh is Posh” t-shirts…and sadly, only NOVA is wearing a non-midriff exposing shirt. Anyways, it’s the best we could come up with on short notice. Josh only likes certain people, you know…) Stephen Joseph Did he just say? JM I don’t like you. Stephen Joseph Did he just say…Sizzle Jizzle? What the FUCK? Oh, Josh, you’re still here. Wow. I feel so hurt by your comments. So sad. Really. Here, let me get a Kleenex! I’m really a nice guy, really really really (stomps his feet). JM Ummm… Stephen Joseph Oh. Yeah, I forgot. Fellas, meet the Lightning Crew. They’re right behind you. :: The Lightning Crew jumps the bWo (or Fat World Order, really). It being about a 10 on 3 situation, seeing that PRL just has to have every single member of his family and their cousins around him, the battle is over pretty quickly. In fact, its so over right now that I’m not even going to describe it.:: ::oh, and its pretty obvious Josh is having a bathroom problem:: ::And Stephen Joseph grabbed his microphone too, because Josh is currently backing away from the rest of the Lightning Crew…:: Stephen Joseph Pathetic little wretch. And Sizzle Jizzle? I mean, really, who the hell thinks that up? Okay, fans of the OAOAST. While everyone’s been going on about revolution this, problems that, splintering and groups forming, everyone’s missing the biggest event in the Hiiiiistory of the OAOAST right here, right now. And that’s ole BPP returning to the ring. Now, I got a little b*tch of an opponent before License to Pin, a sub-par opponent, one that makes me wonder how seriously the OAOAST is taking my return. And tonight, I don’t even know who my opponent is. Another woman? A retard. How about a dog and pony show! That’s right, I’ll wrestle a damn dog and pony. I’ll wrestle anyone, anything, the bookers put in front of me. And I will win, until someone in the back, one of the “wrestlers” decides that they’ve played enough tiddly-winks and realizes that they might just have cajones enough to face. I don’t understand why, when I ask for a match, every answer I get is “Ohh, I’m busy.” Ohh, I’m booked. I’m looking at YOU Zack Malibu, at you , Mr. Hoffie Woffie, or at you Axel. Heck, Dan won’t return my phone calls, Rodez pretends I’m not here, and Drek’s more interested in having the LC be a security detail. So, whoever I’m facing tonight, I’ll make it quick, and I’ll make it painful. Wall What if it’s a dog and pony? Stephen Joseph Then what I do will be unfucking called for. Wall You gonna commit animal cruelty? Stephen Joseph … Michael Buffer Ladies and Gentleman, the next match is schedule for one fall! Introducing first, weighing in at two hundred and twenty five pounds, former two-time tag team champion and commissioner of the OAOAST, Sttttteeephhhen Jooosephhh!!! COLE Or…Sizzle Jizzle CABOOSE Don’t Cole. Remember the last time Stephen pitched a fit over something involving…CENSORED COACH Caboose, we’re not allowed to talk about that over the air anymore. CABOOSE Pansy. “Awww Naww” starts up with Nappy Roots running out of the EntranceWay, as the crowd cheers for NR. Awnaw! Hell naw! Man Y'all done up and done it Awnaw! Hell naw! Boy Y'all done up and done it Awnaw! Hell naw! Boy Y'all done up and done it Ah, y'all done up and done it Man y'all done up and done it ::Fish Scales steps up with the microphone as Stephen Joseph comes out to a chorus of boos. The Cuban Wall is behind him.:: My first song was like forty-eight bars with no hook You hear me flippin thru my pages out my favorite notebook The microphone was in the closet (What?) No headphones, we lost it Niggas scared to get some water, roaches hangin over the faucets No AC, Tez'll break a sweat just tryin to make beats E-Dubz was being a hustler, (Heeeyy man!) all play flirtin all his customers, and flat broke Nappy smokin blacks out on the back po'ch I'm thinkin I got everything a country boy could ask for ::Joseph knocks Elbows with Big V before heading down towards the ring, Big V starts his rap:: Now what we do to get here? (Say dat boy!!) Lay it down and bring it to ya raw (Say dat boy!!) Hey now we hurt some, suffered for more, takes what we work for Hated for for the cussin, but the hatred it made us cuss more Held on, but it was hard - stepped up, took charge Ran through what we scared of, but what was we afraid for? Look at what we made of, hard times done made us Being here is alright, but MUST believe we won't fall! Them country boys on the rise! With them big fat wheels on the side! Peep them vertical grills on the ride! And aw-awww-awww-awwwww! Them country boys With them big fat wheels Peep the vertical grills And awwwwwwww! ::Saan and Skinny DeVille are next up, as Stephen Joseph scales the ring steps, soaking in the boos that come with finally being on an OAOAST PPV, wrestling, again:: My yegga, we hogwild, bet that from that roota to that toota-file Hell naw, them country boys ain't headed south for six miles Kentucky mud, them kinfolk, twankies with them hundred-spokes Skullied on that front po'ch, plus you know they got 'dro Seventy-nine coupe DeVille vertical Caddy grill Interstate 65 headin down to Cashville Glass filled, to the tippy-top, back-seat Benz Spent my last cent on the rent, left with pocket lints A damn shame, gotta grind anythang and everythang Jimmy Crack Corn, cross the county line with Mary Jane A long time, a gravel road, to cash and fame and sold my soul To Hell and back, and back and forth, with same jeans and nappy 'fro {Repeat Hook over this part} Them country boys With them big fat wheels Peep the vertical grills And awwwwwwww! Michael Buffer And his opponenent… ::Silence:: MOO! I'm called a cow I'm not about to blow it now for all the cows MOO! And out comes THE COW~! With Farmer Jim as Stephen Joseph loses it in the ring, laughing and hitting his head on the post cushion. MOO! Caboose Don’t have a COW Popick! Coach HAHAHAHEHEHOHOHIHI COLE Fans, this has got to be a first. Farmer Jim leads THE COW~! Down to the ring. A special ramp has been set up so that THE COW~! Can walk into the ring. Jim brings the ropes apart enough for THE COW to daintly enter the ring. Popick is seen mouthing to Wall “You’ve got to be kidding me. If that thing shits on me, in any way, I am so suing.” CABOOSE How’s Popick going to pin it? COLE Fans, this cow has been trained to wrestle! Now, some less reputable websites have said that its actually two guys in a cow suit, but I can tell you from personal experience that its not! COACH Me too! CABOOSE I do not want to know. I can’t believe I am cheering for a cow… SJ sizes up his opponent, all 1400 pounds, as the COW stares down at ole SJ. Farmer Jim is chuckling at ringside, pitchfork in hand. ::DING DING DING:: And Stephen Joseph dismisses Cuban Wall to the outside, and then looks back at the COW, who stands there on all four, looking at SJ and chewing cud. SJ scratches his head and sneakily starts circling the COW. The cow, herded to the middle of the ring, turns and follows SJ with his beady, big eyes. And spits out some green cud...pretty gross. SJ runs to the side of the COW and starts clubbering away, like ole Southern pro wrestlers do. Slapping the side of the COW, pounding with lefts and rights, Stephen's doing everything he can to hurt the COW's backside... And the COW keeps chewing its cud, MOOOO! Stephen Joseph, frustrated, turns around to mutter to himself, and the cow turns its backside to him... COWKICK~! to SJ's exposed backside sends SJ tumbling through the ropes and smacking the ring apron floor. Cuban Wall lumbers over to his boss to check on him. "BOSS, you okay?" "ITS A DAMN COW!" SJ rolls himself back into the ring, and the COW charges in with a headbutt, pinning SJ into the corner. He rams him again, and again, and again, to the delight of the crowd CABOOSE Greatest Match Ever. Let this be the main event of AngleMania every year. I'd never get tired of it. COLE The Cow really has Stephen Joseph now, he's head-pounding a mudhole in him! The Cow lets Stephen Joseph stumble out of the corner and Flair Flop down! Farmer Jim's yelling at the cow "TRAMPLE! TRAMPLE!" The Cow stands over SJ with two hoofs raised, and SJ does what he really only knows what to do...and kicks the COW in the Udders! The COW shudders for a moment, then crosses both front legs in a X covering the Udder and falls over on its side. COACH That's one way to tip a COW. Stephen Joseph crawls over to make the cover, and its 1! 2! 3! Winner: Stephen Joseph via kick to the Udders. Stephen Joseph looks at the COW with this incredulous look, and stumbles out of the ring witih WALL supporting him. The match may have been short, but it definitely was something we, and SJ didn't expect. We're left with his parting words : "It was a FREAKING COW MAN!"

"Chase" hits, and the New New Midnight Express get a surprisingly large pop, as they're lead to the ring by Jim Cornette. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the opening contest at License to Pin is tag team action set for one fall. Introducing first, being lead to the ring by their manager Jim Cornette, weighing 545 pounds, the New New Midnight Express! CUT TO: SOFA CENTRAL Triple C dressed in their Sunday best. The Coach and Caboose stare at Michael Cole, who has a patch over his eye. Caboose raises the microphone to his mouth. COLE (waving off Caboose) I know. Method acting. COACH No offense, Mikey. COLE I liked you better when all you said was "dayum." CABOOSE Now, that's offensive. COLE Guys, let's get onto serious business, and that is we are live from the Skydome in Toronto for License to Pin. Every License to Pin has been memorable in one way or another. We'll opening with a big grudge match, the New New Midnight Express vs. the Heavenly Rockers. And still to come, our HUGE -- and I mean, HUGE -- main event, maybe the biggest of all-time, as one of 4 men will look to make tonight a memorable one as either Gunner Sharps, CWM, Tony Brannigan or Axel will walk out with the OAOAST Championship. We'll talk more about that later on. Back up to Michael Buffer. BUFFER And their opponents. From Sin City, accompained to the ring by Arista publicist Holly-Wood, weighing 448 pounds, the greatest rock 'n' wrestling band of all-time...THE HEAVENLYYYYY RRRRROCKERS! The pop the Midnights got pales in comparison to the one received by the Heavenly Rockers, as "G's & Soliders" blast through the speakers. Holly-Wood sends the male hormones into overdrive as she comes out wearing a sexy policewoman outfit with all the trimmings -- badage, hat, nightstick, which she bangs against her hand and strokes. COLE Wow! Does Holly, or should I say Officer Holly look great tonight or what? COACH (breathless) I'm a human bottle of Viagra right now. CABOOSE I hear sex-enhancing drugs can make you go blind. COACH Oh, The Coach is willing to go blind tonight, 'Boosey. Look at those legs. Her belly -- it's pierced! I'd love to know what's under that navy blue skirt-- COLE Quit acting like this is happy hour, Coach. We may be on pay-per-view, but we're still in family hour. The music dies down and everybody gets set to go. The men and women, because we cater to all demos, still drooling over Holly's attire. Even the Midnights and Cornette can't help not to look. Narcissistic Ned's eyes filled with lust. The Handsome Hustler jiggles both pecs, smirking. Holly makes a barfing gesture, sticking her finger in her mouth. Ned scoffs, the camera picking him up saying "She wants me--bad." Logan pats Holly in the rear on her way out, she responds by playfully smacking Logan in the BUTT with the nightstick. The two kiss and Holly steps down the ring steps. Charles Robinson calls for the bell. * DING DING * COLE License to Pin is officially underway. Sarcastic Simon and Synth starting out for their teams. Those of you who joined us for HeldDOWN... CABOOSE About 6 million people. COLE (CONT'D) ...saw the shocking footage of the Heavenly Rockers being ambushed at a Dairy Queen parking lot by men in president's masks. Everybody's pointing fingers at the New New Midnight Express, rightfully so, in my opinion, due to their sheer and utter contempt for each other. The Midnights were held off television while an investigation was done, angering Jim Cornette who once again threw out the threat of a lawsuit like he always does when something doesn't go his way. COACH You forgettin' the good stuff, Mikey. Tell the people how the Heavenly Rockers declined to press charges like morons and blamed the NNMX without proof they were the one's behind the attack. They or the Board couldn't prove it, but they still forced James E. and his boys to face the Heavenly Rockers if they wanted back in. COLE They didn't have to agree to it. They had their appeal heard... COACH Which took 2 weeks to setup. COLE (CONT'D) ...and they agreed to this. Sarcastic Simon is ready to go, but Synth asks for a moment. He struts to a netural corner and moonwalks back to Saints Central, i.e. the Heavenly Rockers corner, drawing a big pop from the crowd and the ire of the New New Midnight Express and Jim Cornette. Collar-and-elbow tie-up, Synth backed into the corner. COLE Will we get a clean break? Apparently so -- NO! Synth gets out of the way of a right hand, Sarcastic Simon hitting nothing but turnbuckle. The Synthmeister hammering away on the Sultan of Sarcasm in the corner. Singleton whipped across the ring. Back bodydrop! Narcissistic Ned coming in to aid his partner. And Logan takes him out with a SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE! The New New Midnight Express trapped in the corner. The crowd getting involved, counting along as the Heavenly Rockers climb onto the second turnbuckle and drive their fists into the skulls of the Midnights. Synth and Logan get back down and glance at one another, nodding their heads in agreement. They whip Singleton and Blanchard across the ring, Synth and Logan charging right behind, the two forming an "X" as they swoosh past each other, oddly enough. DOUBLE MONKEY FLIP out of the corners! The Midnights getting up dazed. DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE over the top rope to the floor! The Heavenly Rockers dominating the opening minutes of this match. COLE Let's see if we can pick up what Jim Cornette is telling his men. CABOOSE With $20,000 cameras, we better be able to pick up audio. Corny gets motivational, huddling together with Simon and Ned. "They're in the ring, our domain, celebrating," he tells them. "Get back in their and show 'em how it's done. Forget about what's happened. They're running on adreanline. Slow it down. They can't wrestle with us. Make them wrestle." Sarcastic Simon is patted on the back by Jim and Ned on the way back in. COACH That motivated me. COLE Say what you will about Cornette, but he is one of the best ever. He's managed champions in every promotion he's been in. Singleton approches Synth with his left hand raised, wanting a Grecko-Roman knucklelock. Synth cautiously locks up, and pays the price, getting popped in the face with a Sarcastic Simon right hand. CABOOSE The experience of Sarcastic Simon evident there, suckering in his opponent into a false sense of security and then, boom! It's not hard to sucker a rock star, you know. COLE I had the pleasure of speaking with Synth for a few minutes, and people would be surprised to learn how bright he is. CABOOSE So he knows 2 + 2 = 4. Big deal. COLE No. Synth sent head-first into the top turnbuckle. Cornette told his men to slowen the pace of the ring, and they have certainly done that. The crowd has since quieted. Simon calling for the knee. Synth driven into Narcissistic Ned's knee. Good teamwork from the two-time World tag team champions. Tag made. Narcissistic Ned coming in for the first time tonight. Vertical suplex. First cover of the night. ONE... KICKOUT. Ned scoopes Synth up, Synth floating over and shoving Blanchard into Saints Central. Ned frantically tries getting out of the Heavenly Rockers' corner, but Synth holds him long enough to make the tag to Logan. The crowd EXPLODES, as Logan comes in firing on the man who has caused him and Holly problems for months. Narcissistic Ned bails outside, Logan following after. Blanchard slides back in and is booed mecrilessly as he quickly tags out. Sarcastic Simon stomping Logan on the way in. He picks Mann off the mat and stuns him against the ropes with right hands. Simon grabs Mann's left arm, his Irish whip reversed. To the ropes goes Singleton. Logan setting up for a powerslam, but Simon stops in his tracks and kicks Mann in the ribs. Bodyslam attempted, but Logan floats over the top and connects with that snapping left hook! COLE Man, I tell you, folks, that left rang all the way from Toronto to Texas. Singleton goes down like he's been shot. An irate Jim Cornette jumps on the apron and demands the referee check the black glove on Logan's left hand. COLE I'd would assume the glove's already been checked, otherwise he wouldn't be allowed to wrestle with it. But the referee goes along with James E.'s request. Holly and Cornette screaming at each other from opposite ends of the ring. I don't think Cornette would want to get physcial with Holly, in more ways than one. COACH Holly blowin' off Cornette. COLE That didn't sound right. CABOOSE Of course it bloody well didn't. You'd understand it better if it were Bob Holly blowing off-- COLE All right, that's enough. The glove checks out clean. Cornette still isn't buying it, but that's too damn bad. Now he and Logan are exchanging words. Sarcastic Simon sneaking up behind Mann. Watch out behind you! At the last second, Logan moves out of the way and Sarcastic Simon runs straight into Jim Cornette on the apron. Singleton staggers back towards Logan. GUTBUSTER! ONE... TWO... KICKOUT! "TWO!" COACH Two! I just remembered we're in Canada! Heh. COLE Simon's ribs are still a bit tender from that blow he took from the nightstick about 3 weeks back on the most-watched wrestling show on Thursday nights, HeldDOWN. CABOOSE From who? COLE Logan. CABOOSE That's right. And I didn't see you complaining about that horrible act. COLE I admit, it wasn't very sportsmenlike. But there's another man lusting over his girlfriend. COACH What's wrong with that? I lust over Halle Berry. COLE But you didn't send two thugs to put a little "scare" into her, or jump her boyfriend and fellow friend in the parking lot of a fast food joint. Oh, look at this! Logan SLINGSHOTS Narcissistic Ned into the ring. Logan grabs Sarcastic Simon. I think we're gonna have ourselves a meeting of the minds, guys. DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER! Ned falls back through the ropes, landing safely on the apron. Logan takes Sarcastic Simon over to his corner, where a tag is made. Mann slams Singleton near the corner. Synth pulls himself onto the second rope and drops an ELBOW across the chest of the Sultan of Sarcasm. The cover. ONE... TWO... KICKOUT! Sarcastic Simon hit with another gutbuster. Synth following up with kicks to the ribs. Cornette jumps back on the apron, and he's NAILED with a right hand! As Sarcastic Simon pulls himself up on the ropes, the Heavenly Rockers with another tag. Logan comes back in and unleashes a fury of double-axehandles to the back. Mann with an old school backbreaker/rib-breaker. He goes up to the top, his back facing Singleton. MOONSAULT! ONE... TWO... Ned pulls Logan off, diving out of the ring before Logan can have a chance to get up. Blanchard taunts a couple of the fans ringside. In the background, we see Mann hitting the ropes, he nails Ned in the back with a BASEBALL SLIDE that sends the Handsome Hustler running into and over the security railing, nearly knocking over a beautiful African-American women's Coke bottle! COLE Well, at least the Coke is safe. CABOOSE Now, that didn't sound right. COACH It would of been more of an accomplishment if it had been beer. And somebody get me that chick's number. She's smokin' hot. Cornette helps Ned back over the railing. Meanwhile, Sarcastic Simon lunges at Logan, Mann ducking down and backdropping Singleton over the top rope, but Simon lands on on his feet on the apron. He rams his shoulder through the middle rope and slingshots over Logan for a sunset flip, but he lands hard on his back and isn't able to follow through because of the damage done to his ribs. Logan capitalizes, using the middle rope as a springboard for a legdrop. Lateral press, hooking the leg. ONE... TWO... SIMON GRABS THE BOTTOM ROPE! Mann lifts Singleton up and places him on the top turnbuckle. He goes up top, all the way to the top. COLE Oh, my! Logan getting some serious aiiiiiiir. TOP ROPE SUPERPLEX! The crowd gives the high-impact move a round of applause. The superplex taking as much out of Logan as it did Simon. Logan, grabbing the back of his neck, walks over to Saints Central and makes the tag. Synth climbs to the top. He's thrown off and crashes all his body weight down onto Sarcastic Simon with a big splash. THE ROCKET LAUNCHER! CABOOSE The New New Midnight Express might get beat with their own move! COACH That's like the pitcher getting a home run, or the kicker making a tackle. Not only is it wrong, it just isn't supposed to happen. COLE Charles Robinson with the count. ONE... TWO... Narcissistic Ned comes flying into view, breaking up the count. Ned keeps a close eye on Logan on the way up, and when he sees him stick one leg into the ring he acts like he's going back to his corner. When the referee stops Logan from entering, Narcissistic Ned picks Synth up and spikes his head into the mat with a JUMPING PILEDRIVER! He drags Simon back to their corner. Despite Logan and Holly's best efforts, Charles turns around too late. By the time he does the damage has been done and all he sees is Sarcastic Simon reaching up and tagging Narcissistic Ned, who quickly falls on Synth. ONE... TWO... KICKOUT! "YEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!" COLE Ned places both hands on his head. He, nor Jim Cornette can believe Synth somehow kicked out. Narcissistic Ned runs over to Saints Central and SHOVES Logan, baiting him into the ring, allowing him and Sarcastic Simon to double-team Synth in the corner. And Synth fights back! He fights out of the corner with American made right hands and elbows. Blanchard breaks the momentum by RAKING the eyes. Ned pulls Synth out of the corner just to whip him back, but Synth absores the impact and charges out of the corner, leveling the Handsome Hustler with a clothesline! The Synthmeister hits the far side. Spinning back elbow. Sarcastic Simon caught coming in with a hip toss. Synth throws him over the top. Ned brought down by a clothesline. But Synth goes to the well one too many times, being pulled down after going for a third clothesline in about a 30 second span. He reaches through the ropes and grabs a handful of Sarcastic Simon's curly hair. Jim Cornette cocks the TENNIS RACKET... * TWHACK * COLE DAMN HIM! Synth goes down in a heap, cradling his right arm, writhing in pain. That's that same arm the Midnights injured earlier this year. If you recall, Synth walked around for weeks in a cast -- a soft cast, but a cast is a cast. A tag is made. Sarcastic Simon now the legal man. Singelton grabs Synth's arm and drags him to the corner, where he exits the ring and SLAMS Synth's arm against the RINGPOST. He does it again. Luckily, Synth is able to roll away. Simon rips the sparkling silver glove on Synth's right hand and stomps the fingers. Synth trying to keep that hand away from Singleton, but with it hurting Simon is easily able to get ahold of it. The Synthmeister brought back to a vertical case, Sarcastic Simon hammerlocking the arm behind the back and slamming Synth on the mat. Hammerlock slam. Synth pulls the arm out from under his back, Simon dropping to his knees and BITING Synth's fingers! With a wristlock firmly applied, Simon drags Synth to the corner and makes a tag to Narcissistic Ned. Blanchard applies a hammerlock and drives Synth back into the corner repeatedly. COLE Wristlocked once again applied, the New New Midnight Express zeroing in on the arm. Tag made. Sarcastic Simon going back up to the top. Not a lot of high-flying so far in this match. Singleton and Mann are the most likely to fly, with Synth going up occasional and Narcissistic Ned hardly at all. Singelton off the top with a double-axehandle. He goes back to the wristlock and tags Ned back in, surprisingly enough. Blanchard OFF THE TOP with a double-axehandle! We were just talking about how little Ned comes off the top, and there you go. The Midnights with another quick tag. Singelton off the top with a KNEE DROP to the arm! Wow! CABOOSE There's enough tag. In the early going I'd say the Heavenly Rockers were dominating the tags, but the Midnight must have pulled away by a wide margin now. The good thing about quick tags, besides keeping the team fresh, is that they frustrate the other team. They see you tagging at will and it really demoralizes the other team. COLE I doubt the Heavenly Rockers will get demoralized. Sarcastic Simon goes back to the wristlock, Synth breaking free with a knee to the gut. He tries following up with a hip toss, but the arm gives out and Singleton hip tosses Synth over and into a short-arm scissors. Charles Robinson asking if Synth wants to give it up. Like he'll say, "yeah, I quit." COACH You never know. I once asked the hottest girl in High School if she wanted to sleep with me and she said, yes. Simon reaches up and tags Ned. Ned feeling froggy tonight, going back up to the top and dropping a knee across the injured right arm of Synth. Ned places his foot on the ribs of Synth and pulls on the arm. Synth making sure the referee knows he doesn't want to quit as he screams at the top of his lungs. Blanchard drops a couple of elbows down on the arm, then sits against Synth, wrenching the arm back. Synth uses his free arm to place his forearm under Ned's throat and pull back. Ned's eyes look like they're about to pop out of his head, prompting Jim Cornette to say it's a choke. Charles Robinson checks it out and sure enough, it's a choke. ONE... TWO... THREE... FOUR... FI-- COLE Synth finally breaks, but it did what it was intended to do -- free the injured right arm. Cornette tells Narcissistic Ned to finish Synth off. After shaking off the cobwebs, Ned sets Synth up for THE SLINGSHOT SUPLEX. Synth taken up in the air, and he manages to kick back and spring his feet off the top rope and spin around, countering the suplex into a DDT, a.k.a. PERCUSSION! "YEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!" The crowd start clapping and stomping their feet, trying to use their energy to give Synth strength. COLE Roll over, Synth. That's all you gotta do. Roll over. Synth no longer has that chance, as Narcissistic Ned rolls onto his stomach. He, too, rolls over onto his stomach and begins crawling to his corner, but Narcissistic Ned wraps his legs around Synth's foot and keeps him grounded. COLE Tag made. Sarcastic Simon out of the corner with an elbow drop to the back of the neck. Synth scooped up and slammed mid-ring. Up to the top goes Singleton, a place he knows well. Logan shakes the top rope, Simon struggling to keep his balance. Charles Robinson gets in Logan's face, warning him. Logan keeps chatting with Charles, allowing Holly to climb on the apron and PUSH Simon off the top. Singleton lies in a fetal position, writhing in pain, grabbing his crotch. COLE Blanchard and Cornette absolutely livid on the outside. Logan and Holly get the crowd going again, slapping the top turnbuckle and ring apron respectively. Synth turns over and makes the dramatic crawl to his corner, scratching and clawing his way. COACH With all the free aid he's getting, you'd think Synth was a third world country. CABOOSE It's a race to the corner. You got one guy with a bad arm, the other who landed on his balls. And the guy who landed on his balls is the first to make the tag. In comes Blanchard. Narcissistic Ned lunges at Synth who makes the dramatic dive to the corner and TAGS in Logan! "YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" COLE HERE COMES LOGAN! Logan swings over the top rope and kicks Blanchard with boot feet on the way in. Clothesline sends Singleton down. One for Ned as well. Logan picks Ned up by his blonde locks and wails away on the Handsome Hustler. Blanchard screaming for a time out, but gets whipped to the ropes instead. Back bodydrop! Sarcastic Simon attempts to sneak up behind Mann, but Synth wipes him out with a SPINNING HEEL KICK. Ned continues calling for a time out, even signaling for it, as if the referee was deaf or something. Irish whip. Logan ducks down, Ned gutwrenching Mann and up into a Tombstone piledriver position. Mann places both hands on Blanchard's thighs and shifts his weight back, planting Narcissistic Ned into the canvas with a TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER! ONE... TWO... TH-- NO, CORNETTE PULLS THE REFEREE OUT OF THE RING! Cornette has the balls to say a fan did it, but Charles Robinson isn't buying it. He EJECTS Cornette from ringside! James E. can't believe it. Holly comes over and turns Cornette around... * BOOM * Holly with a roundhouse right! Charles orders Holly back to her corner. On her way back, that African-American woman with the coke from earlier jumps over the railing and THROWS the Coke cup in Holly's face, which is really filled with YELLOW PAINT! Her skriek from the cold paint running down her body grabs the attention of Logan. As he goes to check on Holly, Narcissistic Ned nails Logan from behind with the 90210 (Enzurgi)! The cover. COLE No! ONE... TWO... THREE! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" * DING DING DING DING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of the match...THE NEW NEW MIDNIGHT EXPRESS! We see the Midnights and Cornette disappearing through the curtains. Officials out from the back checking on the Heavenly Rockers and handing towels to Holly. COLE DAMN THEM! What a horrible ending to an otherwise great match. The New New Midnight Express just stole a win. But who was that woman? And why did she go after Holly? Oh, man, what a wild way to start off. Hopefully we'll find out more this coming Thursday on HeldDOWNI understand something's going on backstage. Let's go there now.

Send everything to Tony149. License to Pin will take place on Sunday July 31st from the Skydome in Toronto. THE SET: 3 circular screens outlined with sexy STROBE LIGHTS~, a OAOAST logo above it; wrestlers emerge through a black curtain; elevated ramp that connects from the entranceway to the ring (WCW/ECW style); the ropes are red and the turnbuckles and ringposts black.

No. Didn't receive anything from Hoff. LTP's had some bad luck in the past, if the trend continues this year we can all blame Hoff. FWIW, I skimmed UX, and...WOW! It won't curtain jerk now. Also received the Women's Title match, just in case those involved wanted to know.

I think our record for the least amount of matches on a show is 1 but I may be wrong. There may have been a point in the dying days of IZ that there wasn't even a match! At first I wasn't too sure about the Fatal 4 Way, especially being built in one week, but the opening segment did a good job explaining each man's reasoning for deserving a title shot. Eh, wasn't happy with my work this week. I've had a two week layoff so I'm trying to work out the kinks out. But it doesn't change the fact I struggle at writing promos. I either get lucky or have this car wreck effect. Maybe I need to do the old stand-in-front-of-the-mirror trick. Solid Otaku/Boricua bout. As a mark for Bill Watts, I loved the way he was written. Josie's one-line out of nowhere was hilarious, even though it appears to be a typo. In a way, it ended up working better that way. UX should be very interesting. Look forward to it at LTP. Was the © OAOAST Entertainment meant to single the end of the first hour? Nice little touch if so. I've been liking the use of pics the last few weeks. They were hilarious last week, and I guess Jericho will be used for Popick now. Maybe we do need to wresle again, SJ, so I can put you back in your place. Good win for SJ heading into LTP. I'm calling it right now. Alf goes into AS as the #1 contender. It probably won't happen, but if it does -- remember, you heard it from me. The final version of Heavenly Rockers DQ beatdown was completely different than what was originally written. That's why Cole apologized. Wildcard tag ME! Just without the WC moniker. Ah, I remember the days when the ring announcer would say "with TV time remaining." Probably one of the shortest MEs in a while, but still very enjoyable. Overall, good enough show. It probably wasn't a strong as it could of or should've been heading into the PPV, but I guess most are putting all their efforts behind their PPV matches.

COLE I'm being told through my headset something is going on backstage. We have a camera being dispatched as we speak. Okay, I understand we now have a camera in position. Cut backstage, where the cameraman keeps his distance from an on-going arugement between Tony Brannigan and CWM. Dan Black trying to cool both sides. COLE What's going on here? CABOOSE Hmm, let's see. We have two people screaming at one another, and a third party trying to calm things. I say it's an arugement. COLE No need to get sarcastic. CWM The hell with your plans. How many shots at the World Title have I gotten since I came back, huh? TONY You know the story. I should still be the World Champion. CWM You gonna no sell my question? BLACK (to CWM) He's the uncrowned World Heavyweight Champion. The man deserves his belt back. TONY Thank you, Mr. Black. You've always been the voice of reason. (to CWM) Axel needed 3 other guys to beat me. CWM How many did you need? TONY 2. But I didn't need no help. Still don't. Except for Sunday. Oh, come now, CWM. Look, I know I doubted you when you tried warning us about what was happening. I didn't believe you and I paid. Paid dearly, in fact. My World Title was stolen from me. You help me get it back Sunday and I promise to give you a title shot. Think about it. Sold out crowd. Worldwide pay-per-view audience. Main event at AngleSlam. Clash of the champions. Former World Heavyweight Champion CWM vs. two-time World Heavyweight Champion Tony Brannigan. I can get it done too. One call to my lawyers and I'll have you taking Hoff or Brock's place in the main event. Do we have a deal? You know I'm a man of my word. CWM You're a man of your word? TONY (legs crossed) Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye. (to Dan) Isn't this beautiful, Mr. Black? BLACK Very. TONY Two men who mean what they say doin' business with each other. I love it. Put 'er thing, partner? Smiling, Tony extends his hand out to CWM. CWM I'm not done speaking. TONY Please continue. CWM I gave you my word I wouldn't interfere in your affairs. The realization of CWM's impending answer begins to sink in Tony's mind. He loses his smile. CWM And I'm gonna keep my word. TONY NO! Break it. I give you permission. CWM No. Like you, Ton', I'm a man of my word also. So don't for one second think I wouldn't shoot you in the heart if it means me walking out the Skydome with the World Title. "YEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!" The cheer from the crowd tips Tony off that they might be getting filmed. He looks over and sees the cameraman. TONY Oh, great. Now look what you've done. You've ruined everything! Screw unity. You'd shoot me in the heart? Well, I'll stab you in the back and kindly dispose of your body. The title's coming home Sunday night! CWM Don't get so worked up. Look on the bright side. You're right about one thing: the title's coming home. It's coming home to C...W...M! CWM walks off. Tony slams the door on his way back into his dressing room, leaving Dan out in the cold. BLACK Go hound somebody else, you bloody bastard. COLE Wow! CABOOSE (laughing) It's always good to see the Elite having some problems. COLE What's that supposed to mean? CABOOSE Nothing. I didn't mean for it to come off... I just don't like The Original Elite. I wasn't talking about the company as a whole. COACH It just shows how much the World Title means to everybody. We've mentioned how there's only been 10 World Champions. Whenever you have a chance to compete for the title, you're going out there to win and not feed somebody elses ego.

Michael Cole, The Coach and Caboose are seated at Sofa Central. COLE Fans, two weeks ago we told you about an incident that occurred involving the Heavenly Rockers. We reported the event was captured on home video by a fan, but as it turns out it was caught on the store's surveiliance system. The OAOAST apologizes for the mix up. In any event, the incident was caught on tape and turned over to the proper authorities, but the Heavenly Rockers have [i]declined[/i] to press charges. They instead went to OAOAST management and DEMANDED a match with the men they believe are responsible for this Sunday night live on pay-per-view at License to Pin. The OAOAST has gone along with their request and we can now confirm the Heavenly Rockers vs. [i]the New New Midnight Express[/i] for License to Pin! The crowd POPS in the background. COACH Have Synth and Logan been partyin' too much like rock stars, fellas? We haven't seen the footage of what happened, but why wouldn't they want the people responsible to do the hokey pokie in the slammer? Their decision boggles The Coach's mind, and The Coach doesn't like havin' his mind boggled. CABOOSE As stupid as it may be, I think it has more to do with the Heavenly Rockers wanting to legally be allowed to fight "those responsible" without the threat of prosecution looming overhead. Truthfully, I think I'd do the same thing. Although I'd probably wind up in jail because I'd beat my attackers senseless. I'm the first-ever two-time OAOAST World Champion. Cole rolls his eyes. COACH I'd rather have them thrown in jail. CABOOSE That's because you know you'd get your ass kicked. COLE The time for talking is over, guys. We promised you more information as we got it, and that's exactly what we're going to deliver. The tape has been unsealed. This all happened after hours, so the video is dark and it is in black and white, not to mention shocking. Take a look. [b]ROLL FOOTAGE[/b] SURVEILIANCE VIDEO 12:55 a.m. Logan and Holly, followed by Synth and his girlfriend/groupie of the day, a slutty-looking rainbow hair colored bimbo, exit DIARY QUEEN after having obviously received preferential treatment (a "CLOSED" sign hangs on the door). Acting like the happy young couple that they are Logan and Holly have their hands down each other's back pockets. As does the slutty blonde, who, snuggling up to Synth, pickpockets his wallet. The foursome scroll past the six park benches that makeup the outdoor patio located near bushes and a horizontal row of red concrete bars, laughing. Holly pulls a pack of gum out of her pocket and takes a piece out, placing one end in Logan's mouth and biting the remaining portion until their lips lock. CUT TO: PARKING LOT 12:56 a.m. Whenever this DQ is located, it's clearly in a bad part of town. The parking lot is poorly lit, surrounded by bushes and a fence that has more holes than a WWE steel cage. The four approach the "SAINTS & SINNERS" tour bus when two men in RICHARD NIXON MASKS, gloves and jumpsuits leap out of the bushes and clobber Synth and Logan from behind with NIGHTSTICKS. Logan falls forward and hits his head on the tail light, shattering it. He lies in a fetal position, getting kicked in the ribs as blood squirts out of the gash on his forehead. Just feet away Holly removes her SPIKE HEEL and charges the masked men, who move out of the way and spear/clothesline her on the side of the bus! They look over at the slutty blonde who runs off. Blood dripping down his chin and onto his chest, Logan tackles one of the men into the side of the bus and pumpels him. The southpaw furiously hitting the man, desperately trying to remove the mask. Masked Nixon #2 nears, Synth catches up with him and bashes a TRASH BIN over #2. Logan hears the thud and turns around, thinking Synth may be down. Unfortunately that leaves him open to a LOW BLOW. Nixon #1 hurls Mann to the fence and beats him with the nightstick until Synth makes the save by jumping on the hood of a nearby abandon car and connects with a flying lariat that sends the masked man crashing into the fence himself. Nixon #2 sneaks up behind Synth and chokes him -- not with panio wire, but with his bare hands. Synth, gagging, rises to his feet and rams #2 repeatedly into the fence until he lets go. Synth takes a few moments to get some air back in his body and then slams #2 head-first onto the hood of the car. Then, a THIRD MASKED MAN appears out of the darkness -- JFK! A bit on the cubby side, this masked ex-president hammers Synth across the back with a flat object. The masked Nixons come over and pound Synth's face into the cement over and over again while the third man continues hammering him with the flat weapon. Holly gets back on her feet and continues the fight. She locks her hands together and delivers a wicked backhand slap to the chubby masked man, then jumps on the back of another who all too easily snapmares her onto the hood's trunk, denting the hood and cracking what's left of the windshield with her spike heel. As if that wasn't enough, the chubby masked man drops the uglist-looking elbow drop on Holly's chest, sending her sliding down the hood onto the pavement below. A LOUD war cry-like yell comes from out of the shadows. A bloody Logan charges the Nixons. They move out of the way and throw Logan into the side door's window, Mann's head bursting through the glass and half way inside the car. A white PIMPMOBLIE pulls up and the 3 masked men enter. As the car flees, tires screeching and all, the camera zooms in on the license plate... [b]"NED 469"[/b] All 3 members of The Heavenly Rockers are laid out in the Dairy Queen parking lot, moaning and groaning. [b]END FOOTAGE[/b] We return to a disgusted Michael Cole at Sofa Central. COLE (shaking head) We're back live on TSM, and...wow...I want to bring in the New New Midnight Express and their manager James E. Cornette. The Midnights and Cornette walk onto Sofa Central, very somber. COLE You can drop the charade, gentlemen. The Midnights are set for action momentarily, but let's first talk about what we just saw. It's clear to me and all the fans watching that the Heavenly Rockers are right -- you [i]are[/i] responsible for what took place in that parking. "YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Cornette and the Midnights adamantly shake their heads no. COLE My God, Cornette, how arrogant of a person are you to set this up at a DAIRY QUEEN of all places? Considering your history with that establishment, you had to have known your name would immediately jump out as the prime suspect. If the Dairy Queen wasn't enough of a clue, your waddling around in a JFK mask damn sure was. CORNETTE First of all, you don't know me, brother, so next time you level an accusation of that magnitude I'll sue you for slander and have you standing next to Todd Pettengill at the unemployment line. We couldn't have been there. Besides the Midnights being Jack in the Box-type of guys... NED Hi, Jack! CORNETTE (CONT'D) ...if you had done your homework, Michael Cole, like J.R. used to before some moron in production replaced him as the voice of the OAOAST because of some pretty boy fetish, you'd know Sarcastic Simon's wife Rhonda Sue is expecting their second child in the fall. Ned and I were in Charleston, South Carolina at the baby shower supporting a member of our team. We have 35 witnesses plus all the illegal aliens that work at Rhonda's Wal-Mart. Free feel to call if you don't believe me. COLE Then how do you explain the pimpmobile with the license plate "Ned 469"? CORNETTE (nervous chuckling) How do I explain it? Ned, why don't you explain it. NED Me?! Uh... Simon, break it down for them. SIMON There's people all over the country named Ned. "HE CAN TALK!" "HE CAN TALK!" "HE CAN TALK!" Sarcastic Simon threatens the ringside hecklers with a backhand slap if that they shut up. NED The Heavenly Rockers and Holly-Wood aren't the real victims here, anyway. COLE They're not? NED No. It's the fans all over the world were deprived of the opportunity to see the Handsome Hustler -- and Sarcastic Simon, of course -- on their television screens for two weeks. CORNETTE Let's get to the real story, and that's how the OAOAST has lied about everything that's gone down within the last couple weeks. That chain-smoking, coked out of her mind GM Josie Baker... COLE Hey, watch it. That's our General Manager you're talking about. CORNETTE The truth is supposed to set you free, and I'm feeling free as a bird. SIMON A freebird. "HE CAN TALK!" "HE CAN TALK!" "HE CAN TALK!" CORNETTE Why don'tcha tell the folks how Baker had you read some baloney about the New New Midnight Express being "held off television until a full investigation is complete." Make no ifs, ands or buts about it, we were suspended. "YEEEEAAAAHHHH!" SIMON Without pay! "HE CAN TALK!" "HE CAN TALK!" "HE CAN TALK!" Sarcastic Simon and Narcissistic Ned have a few words with the hecklers. CORNETTE Oh, I forgot. You people in Buffalo aren't used to seeing winners; you're used to losers like the Bills and all your other sport franchises who haven't won a championship in ages while my Midnight Express franchise continues to thrive 20 years after it first began. "BOOOOOOOOOOO!" CORNETTE We coulda flown up there, they coulda flown down here. But, noooooooo. They make us wait two weeks before listening to our appealing. And when our appeal is finally heard, we're subjected to this bizzare marketing person rambling on and on about new bendable New New Midnight Express figures before finally getting to the reason why we came. We're told we would be allowed back on OAOAST television if we agreed to face the Heavenly Rockers request at License to Pin. Some people might wonder why we'd agree to go along with the OAOAST's request. That's because we've beaten the Heavenly Rockers before and we'll beat 'em again Sunday night! You keep coming at us like Michael Jackson towards cancer patients. Well, we're gonna go through you like exlax through a widowed woman. You got the wah-wah-wah guitars, the drums and whatnot. But we got the wrestling skill, Heavenly Rockers. Mann and the Tramp this ain't! This is professional wrestling. The most ruthless, violent sport in the world. What comes around goes around. I guess you found that out first-hand in that Dairy Queen parking lot, didn't ya? As a matter of, Simon, Ned -- show what's in store for the Heavenly Rockers at License to Pin. Michael Cole, don't even bother doing commentary on this one, brother, it'll be over shortly. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following con-- Before Buffer can finish his intro the Midnights hit the ring and pounce on their opponents -- Jason Wasten and Kobe O'Neil -- in the corner. O'Neil is thrown over the top rope to the floor. Sarcastic Simon knees Wasten in the gut, Narcissistic Ned connecting with clubbering forearm shots to the back. The Midnights whip Wasten to the ropes. FLAPJACK. Kobe O'Neil is caught coming back in by a Narcissistic Ned sidekick to the midsection, bending him over. Sarcastic Simon out of the corner with a swinging neckbreaker. As Sarcastic Simon climbs to the top, Narcissistic Ned picks Wasten up, front facelocking the young man. The Midnights hit their finishers -- Sarcastic Simon with the VEGOMATIC (flying legdrop), Narcissistic Ned with the SLINGSHOT SUPLEX. Instead of going for the pin, they bring both men back to their feet. COLE Just pin them already. These poor guys don't stand a chance. Wa--Wait a minute. Are they going to... COACH Yes! They're gonna show the Heavenly Rockers how to execute a DDT properly. Ha! COLE The DDT! The Midnights with a pair of DDTs! Jim Cornette's men sending a message to The Heavenly Rockers, as if they haven't sent enough already. This one is all but over. ONE... TWO... THREE! "BOOOOOOOOOOO!" * DING DING DING DING * BUFFER The winners of the match -- the New New Midnight Express! COLE Impressive win for James E.'s New New Midnight Express going into License to Pin, Sunday night. CABOOSE I don't think they're done yet. Now joined in the ring by Jim Cornette, the Midnights with another round of DDTs. Cornette shouts directions to his men while getting in kicks on Wasten and O'Neil. Blanchard scoopes Wasten up and slams him on O'Neil. He then walks over to the corner and propels Sarcastic Simon off the top (ROCKET LAUNCHER), Singleton splashing both men on the way down. Simon and Ned tell Cornette to drop "the big one" as they call it. Cornette removes his jacket and, grinning from ear to ear, drops the uglist-looking elbow drop. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" The crowd becoming vicious in their booing. One old lady throwing her cane into the ring, which is quickly returned by a ringside tendent. Cornette gets up with a big grin on his face, receiving high fives from Simon and Ned. COLE Look at that. That's the same elbow drop that was on the video tape. The son of a bitch has an air-tight abili and this is his way of rubbing it in. Be proud of yourself right now, Cornette. Let's see how happy you are at License to Pin, you bastard. Cornette urges his men for "one more" DDT. COLE Hey, come on! That's enough. You've won the damn match. Now leave the young men alone. They're just trying to make a living, damnit! The crowd ROARS as the Midnights setup for the DDT. The look on Cornette's face is priceless as he sees THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS AND HOLLY-WOOD jump over the guardrail and into the ring, all 3 packing NIGHTSTICKS. The Midnights bail. They want no part of THR. Logan, with a bandana wrapped around his forehead, grabs a mic. LOGAN Listen up, jackasses. It's one thing to hurt me or Synth, but you've gone too far in going after Holly. I warned you. I warned you if you went after Holly again you would have hell to pay. Guess what? Hell is here! "YEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!" LOGAN Cornette, you say the Midnights are gonna go through us like "exlax through a widowed woman"? If you stick your hams in our match Holly has a little something for ya. Show him, baby girl. COACH That's MY catchphrase! Holly makes a circle with her left hand and shoves her nightstick through! "OH!" COACH VIOLATE ME, HOLLY! SYNTH (scrapes and bruises on face) Deal wit dat ya'll mutha'fuckas! The Midnights, Cornette, Heavenly Rockers and Holly-Wood have a staredown. CABOOSE Are we still on? COLE I think so.

The video footage of the incident I know you all have been wanting for involving The Heavenly Rockers. A couple of promos I think NGA is handling a little something as well.

I was going to wait until I feedbacked the entire show before posting, but KC really inspired me ( ), so I present feedback of what I've read so far. More to come when(ever) I finish writing my stuff for this week. Read every promo, all of which were highly enjoyable, especially Axel's which I think is the best he's ever done. Honorable mentions to Hoff's promo and the backstage segment with PK and Zack. Good Wright-PK match. While I don't know much about Kobashi, except hearing he's a helluva wrestler, I liked the "footage" of his and Axel's match. As Hoff has pointed out, the little things are super cool. Backstory! In WWE land that would of never have been brought up. Vince McMahon blushed at Zack's revisionist history during his promo with Dan. "This time I want to feel your bones break, your muscles tear, see your blood on my hands and hear you whimper in pain." Awesome line. Even though Axel vs. Gunner was used to setup the CWM angle, good action while it lasted. Normally I'd enjoy the thought of Josh getting beat up, but the guy has grown on me as a PBP man. Helluva lot better than Cole in real life, and Cole's been in WWE for nearly 10 years now. Just a random thought. Luckily I didn't send the stuff involving The Heavenly Rockers this week because we would of had two segments involving masked men. Yeah, that's a semi-spoiler for this coming week. At least the Docs are back! ::Bumps and Grinds:: Badass ME. Something new. Don't remember seeing us doing many "during the break" bits in the past, so that was neat. Cool finish, with the SomeKick countered into the Anklelock.

A character I've had in mind for months now, and nearly debuted earlier this year. Theodore "Teddy" Moneymaker: As the name suggests, the ruggedly handsome Teddy is all about the money. Heir to a Texas oil company, the cousin of OAOAST superstar Tony Brannigan is considered a "can't miss" prospect.

Compliments to PK for putting together a great show. The presentation was great. Fun open with Leon. The divas and Koko B. Ware stuff was funny. As was the bit with Hoff coming out to Lala. Good Brodie promo. Nice use of the mall with the Stone, GPX, PK segment taking place at a Starbucks. You know the Women's division has come a long way when we have two matches on one show. I've been enjoying the CSI promos the last couple of weeks. Don't think I'd ever place food inside a bathroom turned makeshift dressing room. Solid Otaku II vs. Mephisto match. Awesome Zack/Drek promo war. Hoff did a great job writing the World Tag Team Title match. The Boiz have defeated some mighty fine teams in their time as champs. Alf vs. SG was tremendous. Plenty of groin shots. Alf disgused as Dale was hilarious. Match of the Night. Fantastic main event. Bring on the OAOAST World Six-Man Tag Titles!

I speakth! Tony Brannigan vs. CWM vs. Axel for the World Heavyweight Championship at License to Pin. It would work, with the whole CWM/Brannigan storyline from a month back where I didn't like the fact he got involved in my match. Now that the Elite is on the same page again it's all good as long as the title comes back home. Of course I'd expect CWM to help me beatdown Axel and get the win, only for us to start fighting when CWM begins going to work for himself.

CLOSE-UP: Michael Cole COLE Fans, we still have more great action to come here tonight. In a few moments we're going to hear from the former World Heavyweight Champion Tony Brannigan. Before we do, an incident occurred over the weekend involving the Heavenly Rockers that has resulted in the New New Midnight Express being held off OAOAST television. Footage of the incident was captured on a fan's camcorder and is currently being sealed until officials complete their investigation. We hope to have more information -- and hopefully the video -- for you next week. Right now we're going to hear from Tony Brannigan. It was just two weeks ago, at the Great Angle Bash, that Drek Stone and the Global Party XChange helped Axel defeat Brannigan for the World Title. One could argue that if it weren't for the involvement of Stone and the GPX Tony Brannigan would still be the World Champion. All previous interview attempts have been denied...until now. Let's hear these pre-recorded comments. TONY You must excuse me if I sound bitter...because [i]I AM[/i]! Everybody who saw the Great Angle Bash knows I am the uncrowned World Heavyweight Champion. I didn't lose my championship, it was stolen from me, thanks in large part to Drek Stone and the GPX. For weeks Stone and the GPX have been whining about how they aren't getting their fair shake, how there's a glass ceiling, how me becoming World Champion killed whatever chance they had to rise up and take their spots at the top. I didn't bust my ass to lose the title like this. It took me 3 long years to acheive the goal every wrestler has when they enter this sport, and that's become World Heavyweight Champion. The OAOAST Title is the only championship in the world that makes every other belt look like a red-headed bastard stepchild. It's a World Title I may never have the opportunity to ever wrestle for again because of the enemies I've made in high places. Take Battlebowl for example. Can somebody explain to me why the hell I had to win Battlebowl to get another shot at the title I just held and lost under a controversial matter just a week before? Oh, but it gets even better. You see, I'm drawn a partner who doesn't even show up. In addition to that I'm supposed to face my fellow Original Elite and Black T partner Dan Black and one of the men who helped Axel beat me at the Bash after he sent out an S.O.S. -- Drek Stone. Stone then has his goons come out and attack with baseball bats and he get to advance to Battlebowl. I mean, what the hell? Now Hoff, a guy who had to vacant the World Title 11 DAYS into his reign because of bum knee is the new #1 contender?! That's BS. As the last reigning World Champion I should be getting my rematch at License to Pin, but getting anything through Joise Baker's office at this time is like finding intelligent life-form in Washington. Or bad leadership. Axel, I don't know what's up with you, and frankly, I don't care, but you are walking around with stolen property. Champ -- and I lose that term loosely -- under Brannigan's Law stealing is a major offense, especially when the stolen property belongs to ME. Going back to Drek Stone and the GPX. You guys wanna get down and dirty? Well I got two guys who are more than willing to get down and dirty... The crowd ERUPTS as DAN BLACK and CWM appear on-screen. TONY Your dream came true at the Bash, but in the process you awoken your nightmare. We're not going to need baseball bats to kick your ass. We're not going to need to run you over with a monster truck. We just plan on kicking major ass. Where I come from, Hollywood, the remake is king. Well, boys, you're set to star in the lastest Hollywood remake produced by The Original Elite -- To Hell and Back! Payback is a bitch. Utterly proper considering you and the GPX are the biggest one's in the OAOAST.

Why did the NWA balk at Rick Rude winning the NWA Title from Flair at Fall Brawl? Was it something against Rude or did they just want to keep the belt on Flair? Or some other factor?

Right now it looks like the HD after LTP. We could axe Josie this or next week and have Watts take over GM duties until the new GM is named at LTP or the first HD after the PPV. I think it would be best to hold off on Calvin's return until he's introduced as the new GM. With the ECW boom of sorts, have the announcers speculate as to who the new GM is, with Coach or Caboose saying they think "the OAOAST is about to be taken to the extreme." Tease Heyman, Teddy Long, etc.

I've got an idea for one of your OAOVW guys. I'll send you a PM later.

I had a feeling somebody would pick a Canadian city. Toronto it shall be.

I had planned on having "previously recorded" comments from my character talking about the GAB (Stone and Co. cost him the World Title) and how he's got two guys who love a good fight. Enter Dan and CWM. I'm not sure if that would screw up any plans, I would think not since it'd help with the whole Brannigan/CWM being rubbed the wrong way when Dan cuts a deal, but if it does let me know so I can change it. What about the GM situation? Have you figured that out yet? Because I was thinking we could have Watts announce at the start of LTP that a new GM will be named that Thursday. Something along these lines...

First person to call it.