The Amazing Rando

"Mein Leader...the Burger Messiah has conteracted with their new Dark Meat Tenders! You can buy five for only 99 Cents!" "Damn that Burger Messiah. We shall gas his precious chickens and all they stand for. Now GO, find those in their paper crowns and bring them to the McConcentration Camps. We'll show the world just who we are and get them all on our side..." "...Mein leader...NO!" ...YES! With our new Dollocaust Menu. Opression and Defeat for less than the price of a Whooper from that silly ungrateful Burger Messiah!"

no more "personalities", okay... I am just trying to really put the alliance into some sort of perspective. Wait till Part Two later tonight.

The scene fades up to the living room of the Clark house. Alan seems dazed as his eyes move between the television and Landon and Megan, who sit across the room on a small couch. Cortez sits between them, mumbling to himself as the light from the television flickers across his face, his eyes locked on as he looks to be studying whatever he is watching. Landon keeps his eyes on both men, only occasionally letting his gaze wander to his left and down slightly…to the book Megan has found amongst Alan’s collectibles. “That can’t be what I think it is…” “It is.” Megan giggles to herself and continues to thumb through, stopping and going back a few times as her finger runs across the pages. “I never really sat down and read this thing. It’s actually really, really good!” “What are you two looking at?” Alan calls from his chair as his eyes move between the TV screen and the others. “THIS!” Landon laughs as he pulls the book from Megan’s hands and holds the cover for even the camera to see…The Book of Todd. “What in Todd’s name are you doing with this? You hate him!” “…hateD. He’s gone now and I don’t have to worry about him anymore. If he came back I don’t know how I would feel. And anyway, that’s nothing but a paperweight, although I did look at a few passages here and there. Hell, most of what he preached I used to beat him.” “He preached diving off a truck?” Todd calmly says, his eyes staying glued to the screen. Megan and Landon bust out laughing, and Alan just shrugs his shoulders. “You know, this time last year I was dealing with a Todd and a Landon, just like now. Except this time we are actually tolerable of each other…” “…and you didn’t lose any giant mouse dolls.” The trio looks to Todd again, his odd interruptions causing more giggling from the former “Toddess”. “Yeah, right. And here in about a month it’ll be the one year anniversary of you-know-what…” “HEY!” Alan jumps from his seat and almost dives over his coffee table, but restrains himself and takes a deep breath. “THR-----“ “Don’t even say it!!” Landon is on his feet now, and Todd goes as well, his eyes still stuck on the screen as he stands, throwing up a hand in both directions. Two fingers on the left hand, three fingers on the right. Both Alan and Landon stare at each other. “I could have broken your leg.” Landon mutters as he walks back to his seat, cocky as ever. ”Same to you, Triple Crown Landon.” Alan unleashes the sarcasm, and Landon spins back around. ”I’m a Double Champi—“ “So was I this time last year, man. But someone came and took them both. Let’s not see that happen again shall we?” Alan smirks as Megan pulls Landon back to his seat, trying hard to not put his fist through the face of his former bitter rival. “Quiet, guys.” Todd blurts out. “What the hell are you watching anyway?” “Tapes.” Cortez answers as he turns the volume up on his remote, and through the static the voices of Alan Clark and Spike Jenkins can be heard. “You teamed with that schmuck?” “Once. Wait a minute...were you going through my--?" “Over there…” Cortez points over his shoulder to a huge case, rows and rows of VHS tapes inside. Above, pictures of Alan as Bloodshed, The Apostle, and in full Disney garb hang are flanked by even more from Alan’s near year in the WF, all in perfect rows. A large picture, sitting on top of the case, shows Alan in the ring at SJL Season’s Grievings, on his knees and holding the SJL World Championship to his chest. “You did some crazy stuff, man.” “So?” “Ever since we got here I’ve popped random tapes in and out, and I can’t believe some of the stupid things you tried and actually pulled off…like that truck dive, and…” Todd is suddenly cut off by Landon, who has now turned his attention to the screen as well. “Whatever happened to THAT Alan Clark anyway? The one that wanted to kill Thugg, wrestle in shopping malls, and even try to physically harm me of all people!?” “TRY?” “Shut up. You get the point. Where is he?” “He’s in and out mostly. Got like nine jobs.” Alan’s joke falls on deaf ears. “He’s right here, and you know that. And if you don’t, well just wait.” He puts his finger to his temple and scowls, his expression a little off and his eyes showing signs of deep thought after Maddix's inquiry. After a few seconds, Alan sighs once more before standing and heading out of the room, passing behind the others. “I’ll be back, I need to go check on something in the bus. I think I left something in there.” Landon and Todd nod their head as their eyes go back to the screen, watching Suicide King and Axis shill PepsiMax and SJL Wrathapalooza II. To Be Continued....

Put cut-outs of Hilary Duff on your shoes, Dames. Barron'll kiss them and tell all his friends he "scored".

This riddle is inherently evil. or not.

Burger King was behind the Inquisition. "IT IS NOT A BIG MAC!! SAY IT!!" Also, The Sonic fast food chain can't even get out of the Emerald Isle level without losing all of it's rings at least twice.

Czech just made me laugh so hard I started drooling. Four stars.

Shhhhh... he might be spying. Don't want him to go all "HOW DARE YOU!" again. Boy had his helmet strapped on too tight that day.

does it light up a vase filled with seaweed?

Find 4 more and get yourself your own free diary which you can fill with graphic images involving the Grimace and the Fry Kids that keep you hid safely in their attic.

McDonalds: Come On In And Be Served By Our New All White Meat, Blonde Hair, Blue Eyed Counter Help. Badadadadaaaa...You're lovin' it, or ELSE! And don't forget, this Sunday at Borders books, Ronald McDonald will be signing his new book, McKampf. But I'm sure someone will just think he was just a misunderstood clown that never did anything evil.

K&K, tag stats are part of my stats. They are bare-bones with moves, but there is enough there to make something decent out of them.

This is a pleasant surprise.

Same to you, man. Rock the house.

"and now...back to the program..." Also, I nearly swerved off the road today as I heard diarrehea referred to as "someone throwing a YooHoo bottle into a ceiling fan".

So Snitsky was going to be in the movie and be a "Monster" that proposes marriage? WWE reads too many scripts.

this?

I did call RVD "Sweatback" for a while, after that one Wrestlecrap letter.

Location: Long Beach, California The sun has nearly set on the cool breezy winter’s night on the beaches of Southern Cal, and with the New Year on the horizon; new bonds have been formed where they could never have existed before. Todd Cortez lounges in an abandoned lifeguard chair, a Pepsi-Max in one hand and his thoughts of the last few weeks resting on the back of his mind. The sound of crashing waves brings his eyes closed, silently meditating as he relaxes. It’s always good to have a break, and he is trying his best to take full advantage of every free second he has. Sadly, Todd knows an SWF camera has come there to speak with him, and through closed eyes he speaks…his vision pouring out in his words. “A few months ago, I lost my best friend. He told me that he had everything under control, and that when I saw him again he would have gold around his waist. We all know how that turned out. Revolution Zero cost me my friend and my partner.” Todd sighs quietly, sipping his soda. “Weeks later I saw my chances at once again regaining the tag team championships shatter in front of my eyes twice in less than a week. Revolution Zero cost me that glory. And only a few days ago, I went into Slay Ride looking for vengeance, but every ounce I gained was nearly wiped away by Sean Davis. Davis, you know how I feel about that gold around your waist but I didn’t leave the year empty-handed, oh no. I took your championship as my own, and as I have done with the tag team championship…I will make my name remembered for years to come.” Cortez’s eyes open and they set themselves on the camera, the intensity burning in his voice. “Revolution Zero, you have cost me a lot over the past few weeks and months, but as I look toward the future…only two words seem to stand out --- Martial Law. Look at me. Look at the Urban Legend. I am a man who came into this company on a whim and turned it upside down in short order. Toxxic calls himself a straight edge sensation, and the biggest up-and-comer in the industry. Well look into my eyes, and see a man who claimed one of the most sought after championships in the business in one night. In the same breath as Wild & Dangerous and Justice & Rule will be Hollywood Boulevard. You see Toxxic, I myself am just as straight edge, just as intense, but I have pride. You may have my tag team championships, but I have the one thing you want most of all – singles gold. Landon Maddix did what my friend couldn’t, and left you a broken man. You can talk all you want, you can say things won’t be different – but they will be. I saw your eyes…and I saw a defeated soul. I saw it in the eyes of Mike Van Siclen as he left the arena on that final night…” Cortez jumps down from the lifeguard chair, scaring the cameraman and causing him to fall back into the sand. Todd puts his face into the camera… “…now you know what’s it like to see your world crash around you. You can feel what Mike felt as he left the ring in defeat. As they say, Toxxic…karma is a bitch. Merry Christmas.” The Urban Legend turns and walks away, tossing his Pepsi bottle in a trashcan as he trudges through the sand and over the dunes towards the road, only to find a giant tour bus waiting for him. HOOOOONK! Cortez’s head twists as he looks through the tinted windows, but can not see the figure heading for the front door and leaping out onto the pavement. “…Clark.” Alan Clark comes barreling from the bus and nearly tackles Todd down, but the quickness of Cortez gets the better of Clark, who goes crashing into the sand. Cortez laughs and turns back around to the bus, only to see Landon Maddix and Megan Skye standing in the middle of the road, Maddix holding his hand to his face in bewilderment as Megan hides her eyes from Clark’s fall into the dune. “…Maddix.” “…Todd.” Landon and Todd meet and shake hands, and Megan leans in for a small kiss to the Urban Legend’s cheek. Maddix winces slightly and then shakes it off. “What the hell are you tw-er…three…doing here?” Todd turns back to Alan as he gets to his feet and gathers with the others. “Martial Law.” Clark mutters excitedly as he looks between the two men. “Uhm, yeah.” Landon starts, “This break is surely welcome, but we can’t be resting. Especially me. Alan called me this morning and told me that one of his friends had seen you hanging around Long Beach, and so he wanted to surprise you with the bus.” Landon gestures as Alan shakes his head, nearly twitching. “I see that. So…you just wanted to show me a bus???” “No No No!!” Clark jumps in, his mouth moving a mile a minute… “Don’t you see, they’re on the ropes! We are so close to just finishing them off but they just aren’t going down…like Godzilla just never dropping even after the Japanese shot him over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and—“ THWACK! Megan slaps Clark, drawing two very happy thank you’s. Clark curses under his breath and holds his face, silently making threats towards the World Champion. “I hear that. 3-2 my ass!” Landon smirks, and then turns back to Cortez. “As he was trying to say, Revolution Zero are a team, as much as we don’t like it, they are a team. We have to work together. You have said it yourself – Martial Law. No rules but ours, no survivors but us. They attack, we attack.” “Yes we do, champ.” “Yeah, I’m the World Champion, but think of what I had to go through to get this. Think about what you have had to go through. Think of what Clark has had to……..think about Mike Van Siclen!! “ “I heard that!” Clark scrambles back into the conversation, his hand still across his eye. “Remember earlier this year – I came to your rescue against Thugg!” “But you said you shouldn’t have done—“ “I don’t care what I said!! That’s not the point. When I had to, I stepped up and defended the SJL. Like it or not, you were the last world champion of the JL, and you are the last world champion of 2004! And I don’t care what I have to do, how blood I have to shed, or how many bodies I have to run through…you, me, Todd…. Martial Law is going to walk out of 2005 in the history books! Mark my words.” Cortez, Maddix, and Skye watch on as Clark’s veins bulge out of his forehead, the excitement apparently too much for him. Maddix and Cortez’s sights cross… “So…….we need to prepare.” “Let’s Go.” “Martial Law?” “Martial Law.” “MARTIAL LAW!!” The four put their hands together as if coming away from a huddle, and bring them down slowly, deliberately, all of them speaking together. “Martial…Law.” One by one the four men hop onto the tour bus, first Cortez, followed by Megan and then Maddix. Last but not least, Clark hits the stairs with a bound, and turns to face the camera as the doors begin to shut… “Watch out Revolution Zero… WATCH OUT!! This time…the Law is working against YOU!! WHOOOO!!”

I always assumed they were the same thing. TT is first fall wins.... TWD is elimination style (see: Barely Legal 97 for one instance)

At that point, a Batista/Orton high level tag team could be decent if storylined right. Or at least a friendly sort of alliance, a "we were both screwed...sorry I didn't see it earlier" type deal. Of course, it would probably end up with Orton turning heel again next winter, building up Batista even MORE, only to then turn Edge face to defeat the heel Orton for the title...giving him his one little measly title reign after the long heel run where he eventually realizes that his ego has caused him more harm than good, and thus becomes a huge babyface to get the job done and get that "boyhood dream" and make it real.......then feuding with HBK again.

i'm wondering if this is in Jason's closet about now... http://www.tshirthell.com/store/product.php?productid=385 (don't click if easily offended...also, I don't advocate this shirt)

doesn't Orton claim HBK as a "killed legend"

Hey there, friends. I'm looking for a singles feud for my new heel character and can't figure out anything. If you are free please PM me. PLEEEEASE!!

"i like to think about Christina Applegate..." *giggle*