The Amazing Rando

No matter how many times he tried he could not break his old habits. So what does a smoker do when you take away his cigarettes? What does an alcoholic do when you dump his beer down the drain? What does a wrestler with a history of brutal conflict to his name do when you write the brutality out of his contract? He gets creative. Corporate stand-offs were not something Alan Clark was good at. He had been sitting in a chair across from a few of the Disney’s creative brain trust for the better part of an hour, with Walter Reynolds standing over his shoulder, rarely moving except to put a hand over his face or to pull Clark back down into his seat should he get a little restless. “We are sorry, but we just can not allow you to compete in wrestling contests with that sort of violent history!” “And I will ask you again – do you know how I made my name in the SWF? Mall Brawl, Falls Count Anywhere, Condemned House, Empty Arena…I was almost killed in a vicious street fight against a madman twice my size!!” Alan again shoots from his seat, and once again Walter puts his hands to Clark’s shoulders and pushes him back down. “I was called Bloodshed for crying out lo—“ “Yes, we know of your other contractual agreements and we are doing are best to be as lenient as possible when it comes to how you are portrayed on television in conjunction with our name and corporate image. Now, Mr. Clark, if you do not have anything else for us today…” “What about Pirates of the Caribbean??!” he yells, “bodies being cracked in half, sword fights, rampant violence! You own Miramax and Touchstone! You signed off for Pulp Fiction! Do you know how many times they say the word –“ “Enough, Mr. Clark!” “The average age of an SWF fan is old enough to hear that kind of language. We have an ex-convict for a World Champion. I just want you to hear me out and maybe we can work out a bit of a deal to keep my sponsorship intact while still appealing to a broader audience.” “What kind of a deal?” “If I can get rid of this camera, I’ll tell you all about it.” The camera suddenly goes to static and fades away, a tiny bit of audio slipping through the microphone before it too cuts out… “My idea is called Mir…………..……”

I can't wrap my mind around what that means. Like, what effects would carbonation have in your system, and how would it stay in your body? Carbonation isn't a discrete substance like, say, nicotine, which would travel through your bloodstream. You down too much root beer and have a seizure right after, your asshole will explode. No joke.

From what I can gather, the problems with this week's show were: 1) Spike being too high to remember who to send his marked match to. I doubt that will be much of a recurring problem. 2) Tom usually is not online at night until 11:30 and marking can take a bit of time, although this week I believe he had a no-show victory anyway. I expected, although did not ask about, the show to be posted with a space left for the missing match in question, although on Wednesday night he also might have been waiting for Judge, I'm not sure. If Tom did not have to work late and thus push back any marking he would have to do, I'd suggest letting someone else post the show and maybe on Thursday morning have a card posted by Tom, Chris, or anyone that can be trusted/knows the storylines/whatever .... I do think that, this week at least, was just an exception rather than the rule, though I know usually shows/cards have been posted Thursday nights the last few weeks.

One of my favorite Raw moments if simply for the fact that all three Faces of Foley appeared on screen at the same time, in the "Love Shack". Mankind screaming "CACTUS JACK....IS BACK!" while Dude Love busted a few moves and Cactus appeared on live television for the first time in a few years...fan-freaking-tastic. Trash flying from behind the curtain, HHH's complete "OH SHIT!" expression, and Chyna's wasted dive to break up the pinfall at the very end were just golden.

No, but he works two jobs. Poor bastard.

I'd call Zack and ask him if it wasn't after midnight.

I called Lance Russell the moment his HOF announcement was made official. Where's my damn cookie. (I know Lance isn't confirmed, but dammit The King wants him!)

Do you need a definition? Will it be a funny definition from you? Since when do I do anything funny? How do you catch a unique user to WWE.com? Unique up on them! LOL~!

That's only if nobody that watches Raw watches ECW or Smackdown. I will admit that I was only thinking about the US at first, so 15 million might be a decent number. I don't really see 16 million unique views to WWE.com, though.

Do you need a definition?

Wikipedia also says "September, 1982" for Veneno's victory and "September 7th, 1982" for when Flair got the belt back. It makes a mention that certain title changes are not recognized, and there were quite a few during that time, mostly with Flair.

So more people visit the website than watch on TV? And since WHEN does WWE programming get 15 million viewers a week? Not a chance.

This whole fed is a text-based adventure.

Joey Mercury is... The Malibu Abyss

Fantastic "Cena Sucks" sign

Are you saying they DIDN'T advertise that?

Vince: TELL ME WHO IT IS!! Shane: uh uh... *shakes head with fear*

It's not up yet, for some silly reason. It should have been up over an hour ago.

According to the site, we had a total of 12 live listeners...though that might be due to people turning it off and on... who knows. Drea rules.

LIVE IN LIKE TWO MINUTES~~~~~!!!!!!!!!! LINK IS SOMEWHERE AROUND HERE... http://www.blogtalkradio.com/theswf 1-646-652-2723

It was probably Akira not knowing what button he was clicking like in the Myspace thread.

Even though that isn't what the match actually was, I'd probably watch that. Kane & Undertaker vs. Batista vs. Finlay .... Finlay wins after he uses his International Object.

and THERE'S the blowjob.

I picture Charlie Brown in that last panel, while in the motion of being knocked off the pitcher's mound.

Oddly enough, checking out Cawthon's site, I don't think Goldust (running the "Artist Formerly Known As" gimmick) didn't win a single match during that whole month, losing against everyone from Dude Love to Bradshaw.