Bruiser Chong

There's a skit on the new Ludacris mixtape that takes a shot at the voice distorter device. Finally. It's actually funny, too. I dislike rap skits as a rule of thumb, but even I laughed a few times.

The Tigers wouldn't have traded for a guy they perceive will shore up their shaky bullpen if they really thought they weren't in the race.

What a miserable time it must be for Astros fans. They'd be a force if they had any pitching. As it is, they've got a stacked lineup with few players likely to improve over the next couple of seasons. Meanwhile, their rotation is awful, the pen is spotty, and they are trading anything they can from their farm for guys like Wolf and Hawkins.

The Babe made cell phone calls from inside the Green Monster, too?

On an unrelated note, I help my uncle install carpet and this morning we working on a young couple's home. I was talking about last night's game with my uncle and the guy overheard us and we got to talking a bit about baseball. Turns out he pitched in college and was even drafted in the fifth round by the Brewers (not sure what year, but he's 31), but torn his rotator cuff. Pretty interesting to randomly meet someone who got drafted, let alone by the Brewers.

I forgot about the two draft picks the Tigers are now losing out on for two months of Farnsworth.

I guess the Tigers figure they need more stability in the bullpen. As someone who watched Farnsworth for many years in Chicago, I don't think he's that stability. But whatever. Pudge is pretty lousy now so it isn't like the Tigers are losing a huge part of their offense.

Yeah, most guys who lose a no-hitter in the ninth were so close to finishing the game with no hits.

I keep thinking this is leading to the eventual suicide away message (which I think might be horrible of me to even be suggesting), but after looking at the nature of the messages I posted when I started this thread, probably not.

I'm suddenly not so convinced the NL WC is coming out of the Central. The rejuvenated Mets have made for a revitalized race in the East, so it's not out of the question that either they or the Phillies take the WC. I'm very impressed with the Cubs, though. Last night's victory can be attributed to shoddy Brewer fundamentals, but they over-matched the Brewers tonight. Zambrano came through and there were contributions from the Cubs' lineup up and down. They need to win at least one more game in the series, though. It's excellent they picked up both games against Milwaukee's aces, but winning the series or straight up sweeping them would send quite the message.

Apparently someone finally responded to her long-winded woe-is-me away messages, because she had one up last night about how much she loved her best friend and how thankful she was for her. Didn't last long, though...

It's not like anyone followed any of the match's other rules.

If Adam Jones hadn't hit the ball to the warning track and instead hit it out, he would've had two grand slams. Both on Monday, neither on Sunday.

God damn what a game. Bob Howry should not be allowed near close games, though.

I will not turn this thread into a mission to get my fellow smart markers laid.

She's actually pretty attractive. She has one of those pointy noses with the bridge that sort of swoops down to the front, but other than that I can't imagine she would have much trouble finding dick to be thrown her way. I'd imagine her loneliness is the byproduct of her habit of becoming emotionally unraveled at every bump in life's road.

I don't think Lou plans to use him in save situations until Wood comes back, but it is nice to see that for now, there's another semi-reliable arm down in the pen. Lord knows something in my apartment was going to get damaged if I had to see Bob Howry cough up another lead.

Applications are a welcome distraction from the severely stretched out pages caused by schmucks who don't understand the concept of creating a page with pictures, videos, and text that isn't a visual abomination.

I just watched the 1998 and 2000 versions tonight. Oh, where to start? Both matches epitomize everything I hated about WCW once the nWo angle ran its originally useful course. Logic and any semblance of structure were tossed aside to make way for swerves. I liked my share of swerves when I still regularly watched wrestling. But it got to the point in WCW where few of them made any sense. Nothing could ever just be as it seemed and it made for non-compelling, redundant television. The rules of the '98 War Games defeat the entire concept of the match and make the choice not to just have everyone out there from the start puzzling. I've come to realize that Bret Hart was, for the most part, incredibly boring in the ring while working for the company. Everything falls apart with Hogan's early appearance. I honestly didn't know what was going on with the Warrior's whole ordeal. And why is security trying to separate two guys who are competing in the same match at that very moment? The 2000 War Games is awful for all the reasons everyone's noted here. I questioned why Booker didn't just climb down the outside of the cage when he had the belt like Al did, so this is something that was probably clear to most people who didn't have booking powers in WCW at the time. The inclusion of the array of guys who aren't part of the match adds more excess to a crowded premise. And why the hell are there handcuffs all over the damn place? It seemed like every time I paid attention to someone else, they had been handcuffed to the cage. God, I hate WCW. There may have been some enjoyable stuff peppered throughout the general drivel that was this company's product in the late '90s and early millennium, but I absolutely refuse to wade through so much trash to find a couple gems. The 1991 incarnation, on the other hand, is almost as great as the next year's.

Would anyone like to be this girl's friend?

I take for granted the knowledge that Harvey Dent is Two-Face. I've seen this in theaters three times and there have been many people at every showing who fancy themselves masters of deductive reasoning and start whispering "Two-Face, Two-Face" after Dent gets burned. You can't expect everyone to know all about the Dent character, but anyone who's picked up a Batman comic with Two-Face in it, seen the animated series or hell, even been vaguely familiar with the character knows that Two-Face was once Harvey Dent.

As much torment as they've brought me, I sort of dig the Marlins. That they do so much with so little while plugging in young, talented players into everyday roles would be even more admirable if it weren't obvious the strategy is a result of their dickhead owner's frugality.

I know it's no secret, but the Marlins' defense is dreadful. I hadn't gotten a chance to see much of it until this series, but it's some cringe-inducing stuff and probably what keeps them from being a legit contender in the long run.

It was nice to see Soriano tie it up, but you knew it wouldn't last with Marquis throwing BP out there. He's one of the most frustrating pitchers to watch if you're a Cubs fan. At least there's still the idiocy of Ned Yost, who left Suppan in to give up seven runs in the fifth inning and didn't even have anyone warming up in the pen.

Ok, I was wrong vis-a-vis a series split at Wrigley. Jason Marquis is awful and with the pen drained and a four-game set starting in Milwaukee tomorrow, we're gonna have a repeat of Marquis' start at The Cell two years back.