Rob E Dangerously

The lineup tonight David DeJesus [Yay!] Graffanino Harvey Stairs (DH) Berroa Brown Mateo (RF) Relaford Castillo

You could have said the same thing about Tony Muser.

Considering that there's only three healthy outfielders on the team, it's either Stairs at DH and Relaford in RF or.. Stairs in RF and Gobble batting

For tonight v. Radke 1. Graffanino (2B) 2. Dee Brown (LF) 3. Harvey (1B) 4. Stairs (DH) 5. Berroa (SS) 6. Buck © 7. Bautista (3B) 8. Mateo (CF) 9. Relaford (RF) Although ideally, I'd want to be working with more than 11 healthy players (the other two guys are Castillo and Damian Jackson, fyi). DeJesus will still be out due to a bruised hand. Sweeney experienced another freaking summer Back Injury, so he'll probably either come back this week or go on the DL.

Nevermind that it's easier to deal with relievers than starters since most of the starting pitchers will still be working in the days before the game.

Ken Harvey isn't the worst hitting first baseman on the team either. As for Beltran, is it really guaranteed that he'd replace an injured outfielder?

today in Minneapolis: Gobble v. Radke Will Jose Bautista (6 for 33, 5 walks, 17 strikeouts) bat leadoff tonight?

considering that I use a popup blocker.. I didn't notice that.

The petition is here just mentioning that

yeah.. the right has a way of distancing themselves from various people once they get 'embarassing'. (I'd imagine you're keeping your distance from the people who are putting out petitions urging Ashcroft to brand Michael Moore a traitor). I was just commenting that you were making a comparison with one event which would have never happened

Wait, they had large screenings of "The Clinton Chronicles" and I missed it? I could have sworn that the Chronicles was something you can get on VHS

http://houston.astros.mlb.com/NASApp/mlb/h...s_hou&fext=.jsp Allard Baird screwed Beltran hard. So, since he's on the AL All-Star Team, he'll naturally be wearing an Astros jersey. The sound you hear is the sound of Scott Boras screaming. He's expecting 15 million for a guy who hasn't played in an All-Star Game. Expect him to bitch hard

I gotta say. Considering I was booked against someone who was 100lbs larger (a bit questionable), I did my best. --- We cut back to the announcer’s table. Comet says "Our opening match promises to be quite a contest" Riley replies "Well, unless you have a death wish for Robzilla. The Perfect Storm is 5 inches and 100 pounds heavier" Comet responds by mentioning that "Gilbert will have to deal with that a lot, he’s the smallest man on the roster" Riley shakes his head "It seems that cruiserweights like Rob Gilbert always get put with heavyweights" Comet smirks "If Rob Gilbert has a problem with facing athletes like Citizen Davis, he can go home" Riley laughs "It’s not that, it’s just that this is a David v. Goliath story. Well, not story, but vignette, something like that. Of course. But, we’ll see who takes home the winners share of the purse and who gets to eat applesauce and live with the pain of losing" "Well, we’ll see which citizen can prove themselves to be the victor in this epic struggle" Comet says with candor in his voice. The scene falls to a hush as Funyon stands in the center of the ring with his mic. "The following match is the opening match. It is scheduled for one fall" Flashes of white pyro begin to streak from ceiling to stage, imitating lightning. *BOOOOOOOOOOOOM* "ooooh…" "Headstrong" by Trapt kicks up and the arena goes dark as lines of flame burst alive and border the stage Funyon says "Introducing first.." Sean steps out with his lawyer Marcus Washington, followed by a blue spotlight. "Making his SWF debut, He is accompanied by Marcus Washington, and he hails from Jacksonville, Florida" Funyon says "Weighing in at 270 pounds, SEAN DAVIS!" Riley comments "Wow, impressive and blue" Comet responds "I bet a fire alarm’s going to go off sometime soon" Riley replies to that statement with a laugh "and you’ll lead us outside, Firebreaker Comet, won’t you?" Davis enters the ring, glaring towards a section of the crowd where someone yelled "Jailbird" as we return to regular lighting. "Serial Thrilla" by Prodigy starts to play and we see Rob Gilbert walking though the curtains followed by his bodyguard and trainer Mitch Duncan. Funyon stands in the center of the ring for the next introduction "And his opponent, accompanied by his bodyguard and trainer Mitch Duncan, hailing from the fighting city of Chappaqua, New York" Gilbert stops and walks down the stage to his left, emptying a bottle of water on the stage. Funyon continues his introduction "he weighs in at 165 pounds, ROB GILBERT!" Gilbert walks down the entrance ramp, ignoring the boos of the fans, Gilbert enters the ring and stands in his corner. Comet observes "Doesn’t it seem like Gilbert would be better suited to face Washington, and Davis would be better suited to face Duncan?" Riley laughs "You have too much time on your hands" Our referee Matthew Kivell delivers verbal warnings to both Washington and Duncan and he calls for the bell. Comet muses "Well, neither man is too popular here, and both seconds will want to help their men out" *DING DING DING DING* Gilbert paces around the ring, holding on to the ropes as Davis shakes his head. Gilbert then rolls out of the ring and begins to drink some more bottled water. Comet laughs "He needs water now? Who does he think he is, Aquaman?" Riley groans "I know he’s not you, because he doesn’t blow so badly" Gilbert walks around as the referee starts a count. Gilbert then rolls back into the ring and gets on his feet. He walks towards the center of the ring and offers a handshake to Davis, but he pulls back quickly to stroke his hair. Davis responds by elbowing Gilbert in the face, sending him down to the mat. Gilbert rolls back to a corner, holding onto the ropes as he gets back to his feet. Gilbert smirks and holds his left arm up for a test of strength. Comet says "I don’t think that’s going to work out very well for Citizen Gilbert" Davis shakes his head and charges in and Gilbert moves out of the way. Gilbert then kicks Davis repeatedly, landing kicks against his back and Davis turns around in the corner. Davis charges towards Gilbert with his left arm out for a clothesline, Gilbert ducks and attempts a reverse neck breaker, but Davis blocks that move and turns around. Davis hooks his arms around the thin waist of Gilbert and thrusts him up into the air, sending him down hard onto the mat with a release German Suplex. Davis picks Gilbert off of the mat and hooks him in a Full-Nelson, he lifts him up and slams him onto the mat. Comet declares "Gilbert may not be much of a match for Sean Davis" Riley replies "Maybe, we’ll see, won’t we? Either way, these fans lose, big time" Gilbert crawls towards the ropes and grabs onto them. Gilbert attempts to pull him off the ropes and is warned about doing that by the referee. Gilbert kicks Davis in the back of the knee while Davis is being warned. Gilbert then punches Davis twice in the kidneys, drawing a warning from the referee. Gilbert knee lifts Davis but Davis doesn’t move an inch. Gilbert then runs towards the ropes, hooking the top rope and slinging himself to the floor feet first. Comet groans "Gilbert’s trying to stall for time here" Riley laughs mockingly "Why not Comet? He can’t be the go-getter like you are. Haha" "1" The fans boo Gilbert as he walks around on the floor, drinking bottled water. Davis motions for Gilbert to get back into the ring. "2" Gilbert laughs and struts on the floor. Davis then steps though the ropes and starts to chase after Gilbert. Gilbert slides into the ring and runs to the opposite side of the ring, hooking a ring rope. Comet says with a sense of disgust "Gilbert doesn’t seem very confident that he can beat Davis here. Look how he keeps holding on to the ropes" Davis re-enters the ring. Riley laughs and says "You know, Robzilla knows the rules. Davis can’t do anything to him if he’s in the ropes. He’s not a coward, he’s smart" Gilbert charges towards Davis and goes for a high knee to the chest of the larger man. Davis grabs the leg and then clotheslines Gilbert hard onto the mat. Gilbert staggers back onto his feet. Gilbert then attempts his fabled "Discus Elbow" spinning elbow to the head, but Davis doesn’t move an inch for that either. Gilbert kicks Davis in the midsection and then kicks him hard in the groin. The referee admonishes Gilbert as he apologizes to the referee and to Davis. Riley smirks and says "See, he’s not a coward, he accidentally kicked Davis in the groin there and he’s sorry" Comet groans and replies "You fool, my sincerity detector isn’t picking up a thing, he’s lying" Riley laughs "Well, I guess he’ll be wearing a cup from now on" Gilbert picks up Davis and pats him on the back, shaking his head with faked regret. Gilbert then kicks Davis in the midsection and attempts to pick him up for a suplex. Gilbert struggles hard in this task, and then he drops Davis on the ropes, suplexing him back onto the mat. Gilbert is too winded from the task of lifting the mighty Davis off of his feet and suplexing him to utilize his execution of the Slingshot Suplex. Gilbert catches his breath and kicks Davis in the midsection. Gilbert then scrapes his boot over Davis’ face, and the referee cautions him again. Gilbert responds with a smile, lifting his boot and wiping it off with his hand. The fans boo Gilbert as he lifts Davis up to his feet, applying a side headlock to his opponent. Gilbert smiles again and starts to rub his fist over Davis’ head before slapping him on the top of the head. Davis responds to this insult by lifting Gilbert up high in the air and dropping him with a backdrop suplex. Gilbert flops onto his stomach, holding his head and begging for mercy from Davis. Comet laughs "He’d be better off just writing him a check here" Riley replies with mock laughter We hear grumbling from the other half of our announcing crew as Davis pulls Gilbert up by his hair and throws him into the ropes, Davis comes back, toppling the so-called Robzilla with a Shoulder block. Gilbert stumbles, holding his neck and complaining to the referee about the hair pulling. This inspires Comet respond with "He has no room to talk about the rules here, he breaks them regularly!" Davis kicks Gilbert in the midsection and lifts him up in the air in a military press slam. Davis then proceeds to press Gilbert up in the air. "One!" "Two!" "Three!" "Four!" "Five!" "This is impressive" says Comet "Six!" "You jackass!" Riley yells "Seven!" "I could press that a lot too" Riley snorts "Eight!" Davis then slams Gilbert hard onto the mat. Davis then drops an elbow across the chest of Rob Gilbert. Riley laughs "I don’t mind Davis, but he’s not earning World’s Strongest Man with that" Davis then lifts up Gilbert in another Military Press, lifting him up again. "Nine!" "One!" Riley yells, "He started over, you idiots!" Davis then drops Gilbert face first onto the turnbuckle. Gilbert grabs his face in pain with one hand and holds onto the ropes. Davis lifts Gilbert up to his feet and chops him across the chest. Davis rips Gilbert’s collared shirt open and chops him hard again. Davis grabs Gilbert by the shirt and throws him into the ropes, and then Davis executes a brutal spine buster. Gilbert is gasping for wind on the mat as Davis covers. "ONE!" "TWO!" Gilbert drops his foot on the rope and the Referee stops his count. Davis lifts Gilbert up onto his feet again as the crowd begins to stir. We see that Mitch Duncan is now standing next to Marcus Washington and they’re in an argument. Davis yells at Duncan and Duncan attempts to pull Washington’s glasses off. Davis steps towards the ropes and points at Duncan yelling. The referee then steps in-between Davis and Duncan and we pick up what he’s saying. "Duncan, stop causing a scene or I’ll have to expel you from ringside" As this is being said, Rob Gilbert pulls a small chain out of his tights and wraps it around his fist. Duncan argues with the referee and Gilbert nails Davis in the face with the chained fist of fury. Comet groans "Citizen Gilbert would rather cheat then wrestle fairly here!" Riley replies "Citizen Gilbert would rather win and get a good check than lose here, you blubbering fool" Davis falls to his knees as Gilbert deposits the chain in his tights. Meanwhile at ringside, Duncan hands Washington his glasses back and the referee walks away from the scene. Gilbert picks Davis up and executes the DDT on the dazed man. Gilbert then goes for a cover, hooking a leg "One!" "Two!" Davis kicks out. Gilbert punches him around the back of the head and hits a reverse neck breaker on him. Gilbert shakes his head and holds it for a moment before dropping his medium-sized elbow across the chest of Sean Davis. Gilbert shakes his head again and drops another elbow across the chest of Sean Davis. Davis rolls onto his stomach and gets on his feet. Gilbert hits Davis in the throat and snap mares him into a sitting position. Gilbert then locks a sleeper hold on Davis. Riley laughs "It might be early in the night, but it might be bedtime for the Handsome Hurricane" Davis slumps down for a bit but he elbows Gilbert in his side, breaking the hold. Gilbert unleashes another cheap shot on Davis as he gets to his feet. "This match has been nothing but cheap shots from Rob Gilbert" Comet protests "And stupid comments from you" Riley replies Gilbert steps to the side of Sean Davis and drops the larger man down with a Russian Leg sweep. Gilbert struts to a corner and steps onto the second turnbuckle. He leaps off with his elbow cocked and ready, but Davis rolls out of the way before contact could be made. Gilbert alertly lands on his feet and laughs. Gilbert then holds his left arm up in the air for one moment before motioning to Davis to "come get him". Davis charges in and Gilbert applies the dreaded Iron Claw to the top of Davis’ forehead Comet declares "The old masters of the claw hold must be rolling in their graves at this sight!" Davis elbows Gilbert on the top of his head, sending him stumbling backwards and breaking the dreaded claw hold. Gilbert shakes his head and moves forward, but Davis grabs him by the throat and quickly choke slams him to the mat. Davis goes for a cover. One! Two! Thre — Gilbert kicks out! Gilbert rolls over onto his stomach to catch his breath after using all his energy to kick out of that move. Davis grabs Gilbert from behind, hooking his hands around Gilbert’s thin waist, and executing another brutal release German Suplex. Gilbert flops onto his stomach again, with a hand on his head. Riley laughs "That’s the way to do it! I’ve always liked Davis, you know!" Gilbert gets up onto his feet, staggering wildly and holding his head. Davis then moves his head back and head butts Gilbert, sending him stumbling back into the corner, grabbing his head in pain. "Obviously, Citizen Gilbert’s head and neck are in pain!" Comet observes *BOOM* Davis steps forward and unleashes a big hook across the face of Gilbert, which almost launches him through the ropes. Gilbert lays on the ropes stomach-first and Davis pulls him out. *WHAAAACK* Davis hits Gilbert with the big back fist and Gilbert is knocked on his back. But his feet are under the bottom rope and Mitch Duncan starts to pull him out of the ring. Then Marcus Washington walks up to him and starts to protest to the referee. Davis then begins to pull on Gilbert, involving himself in a tug-of-war with Mitch Duncan, with Rob Gilbert as the rope. The referee then begins to count. ONE! TWO! "If Duncan doesn’t let go, Gilbert might be disqualified!" Comet declares THREE! FOUR! Duncan lets go of Gilbert and Davis drags his body into the center of the ring. The referee is ordering Duncan and Washington to opposite corners as Davis picks Gilbert up by the waist. Gilbert then hits Davis in the groin again, causing him to slump down a bit. Gilbert whips Davis into the corner and catches his breath again. Gilbert then walks in and punches Davis with little success. Gilbert pulls Davis out of the corner and gets on the top turnbuckle. Gilbert applies a front face lock on Davis with one hand while punching Davis around the armpit with his other hand. Gilbert then swings around and drops Gilbert with the Tornado DDT. "Gilbert is down and he’s getting back to his feet slowly" Comet observes. And indeed, Gilbert is holding his head and he goes to the top turnbuckle. Gilbert flies from the top turnbuckle and hits a frog splash on Sean Davis. Comet says "You know, Gilbert should have just covered him there" Riley replies "Mr. Know-it-all.. bleeh" Gilbert hooks a leg and we have a cover. ONE! TWO! THR — KICKOUT BY DAVIS! Davis rolls onto his feet and Gilbert shakes his head in frustration. Gilbert then pulls his collared shirt off. Riley says "Ooooooh, he means business now Comet. And look at his uniquely chiseled body" "Was that chiseled with a butter knife?" Comet says with a laugh Gilbert lifts up Davis and locks him in position for Straight out of Chappaqua, his reverse Russian leg sweep of choice. "This might be the big move Comet!" Riley says with enthusiasm. But Davis counters it by dropping his left arm down and front face-locking Gilbert. Davis then lifts Gilbert up, holding him in the air, and drops him with a nasty Brain buster DDT. Gilbert holds his head in pain and Davis picks him up off of the canvas. Davis then lifts Gilbert onto his back like he was nothing and drops him hard onto his back with a Death Valley Driver. Davis then goes for a cover near the ropes. ONE! TWO! THR – "ROBZILLA HAS HIS FOOT ON THE ROPES!" Riley observes, loudly The referee notices the same thing and stops the count before his hand made contract with the canvas for three. Davis shakes his head and has a comment or two for the referee. "If the referees weren’t so lewd, we’d hook a microphone on them" Riley laughs "Oh come on, that’s not true" Comet says, with a groan. Davis lifts Gilbert up off of the canvas, Gilbert flings an elbow towards Davis, but Davis grabs his elbow and locks a reverse armbar on Gilbert. Gilbert holds his head in pain with his other arm for a moment before reaching out and grabbing the rope, forcing the break of the hold, or so you’d think. "ONE!" "TWO!" "I’m finding reason to like both men here" Riley observes "THREE!" "FOUR!" Sean Davis breaks the armbar and glares at the referee. Meanwhile, Gilbert holds his arm with a look of pain on his face. He complains to the referee as well. Davis grabs Gilbert to whip him towards the ropes. But in a reversal of fortune and a reversal, Gilbert counters and whips Davis towards the ropes, and in the process, Davis takes out Kivell. "I bet that was accidental too!" Comet says skeptically "Damn, did Rob Gilbert walk under a ladder? A lot of accidents are occurring around him" Riley says, chuckling Davis gets back to his feet and locks up with Gilbert, going behind him and locking him in a full nelson. Davis then lifts Gilbert up and drops him with a full nelson atomic drop. Gilbert slumps down onto all fours holding his neck. Davis picks up Gilbert and pulls him up for a piledriver. Davis then drops him hard on the mat with the piledriver. But unfortunately for Sean Davis and his hopes of winning, the referee is unable to get to his feet. Davis shakes his head and picks up Gilbert. "Davis lifts him up by the waist and it looks like time for the Maelstrom!" Comet says Riley replies "This’ll be it for Rob Gilbert" But Mitch Duncan has shoved Marcus Washington into the ring rope and jumped onto the ring apron. Duncan then pulls Gilbert down feet-first onto the ring apron. "This singles match has turned into a 2 on 1 affair and this is appalling!" Comet snorts with indignation Davis clotheslines Duncan off of the apron, sending the big man crashing to the floor. Unknown to Sean Davis, Gilbert has pulled a pair of brass knuckles out of his tights and he’s put them on his left fist, Gilbert charges forward and nails Davis in the head with the knux. Comet yells with outrage "Come on! This is blatant cheating by Rob Gilbert!" Davis slumps over the top rope and Gilbert hits him with a hotshot. Davis falls onto the canvas holding his throat as Gilbert re-enters the ring. Marcus Washington jumps onto the ring apron and gets hit in the face by the knux. Gilbert then drops his knux-wearing fist on the face of Davis. Gilbert then puts the knux away and picks up Davis. The referee is coming back to his senses and Gilbert schoolboys Davis to the loud boos of the crowd ONE! BOOOOOOOOOOO! "He has a handful of tights!" Comet yells with more outrage TWO! "No, he doesn’t, you fool!" Riley replies THREE! *DING DING DING* The fans boo loudly. "YOUR WINNER OF THIS MATCH… ROB GILBERT!" Gilbert gets to his feet and starts to jog towards the back, holding his head in pain and leaving his bodyguard behind. "Rob Gilbert is getting the hell out of here and he had to cheat blatantly to even stand a chance here with Sean Davis, this is just disgusting" Comet grumbles "It’s a David beats Goliath story! But, Sean Davis will be back, even if he was beaten fairly" Riley laughs after saying that. "Fairly? He had a handful of tights!" Comet yells "No he didn’t! But, on an unrelated, I did see more of Sean Davis than I expected here" Riley observes Comet quips "Such as his exposed backside?" "No, his talent and strength, he’s a good kid, but he was beat fairly" Riley replies Comet grumbles "Let’s move on"

No other comments for the Alley Fight?

Did Misawa use the boombox on Buck?

so, when did Mahay come up as a pinch hitter? Texas should put Soriano on the mound for the bottom of the ninth.

Jose Bautista is batting leadoff again today, and he now has 16 strikeouts in 31 at-bats Batting cleanup today: Ruben Mateo. Career slugging average: .397 I hate you Tony Pena

That must be come heavy duty material

Problem is, though Robbie, you're still just strictly using the popular vote as your only means of determination (Yeah, that sounds weird, but bear with me). It still falls prey to the domination of the population centers since there is no balancing effect for diversifying the vote; it's 'same system, different t-shirt'. If you want a more proportional electoral college, then do it by congressional districts: They are all mandated to be the same size, and it allows for states to split their electors. And even then, I'll point out that Gore won less than 200 Congressional districts. He still wouldn't have won because he only appealed to the big population centers. Well, the thing I did is still a bit odd. Basically, I can't remember the exact system but I put it on a spreadsheet. There was rounding up and all that involved, and with that, there was an occasional case of more votes than the state had (due to rounding up, i'd say). The California allocation on the spreadsheet for 2000 was 29-22 for Gore. (The pop. vote was 53% to 42% for Gore). As for congressional districts. The US Election Atlas ( www.uselectionatlas.org ) says that the results are 226-209 for Bush. And adding the at-large votes (for the two Senate seats) and the 3 DC votes. It's 286-252 for Bush. Which is a pretty large margin. I'll stick with my system, even if it would have sent the vote to the House since it gave 267 votes to Gore, 264 to Bush, 6 to Nader and 1 to Buchanan (Well, the fourth place guy in California gets a vote, and he was in 4th place) I'm sure saying "Puerto Rico should get a vote in the Presidential election" is something for another day. Although, I don't know where they'd fall, they'd probably vote Democrat.

Here's the Ken Harvey Chronicles June vs. Arizona: Knocked out of a game after colliding with the tarp (He was going for a popup, he went over the tarp and fell between the tarp and the wall) June vs. Saint Louis: Knocked off of his feet by JD Drew by accident May vs. Boston: Hit in the face by Jason Grimsley's hand as Grimsley was trying to throw to first. July vs. San Diego: Hit in the back by Matt Stairs' throw to the plate, as Harvey is in a seated position looking towards the plate. And he's still a better fielder than Sweeney

well, it wasn't intentional. It was a screwed up slider. Meanwhile in San Diego. Mateo with a double to score Brown. Relaford walks. Mateo scores on a groundout. Graffanino hits a home run. And then the go-ahead run scores after the throw from Matt Stairs hits Ken Harvey in the back (as he was watching the play at the plate) I'm not kidding.

Dee Brown breaks up the no-hitter (and he hit it to Kerry Robinson, the defensive replacement in left) That might make up for him fucking up a simple fielding play And Eaton throws a wild pitch to Mateo which hits the umpire

No-Hitter though 7. But, I said doomed since it's against most rules to mess around with the defense in the middle of a no-hitter. The Royals should go for a bunt

ooh, they just messed around with the defense (Robinson in, Klesko out) Eaton's doomed

Does he really have a better option. Bautista (in limited action) has a .333 OBP. Only Kelly Stinnett (out for the year), Ken Harvey (cleanup hitter), Alberto Castillo (in 18 at bats), Carlos Beltran (traded), Joe Randa (injured), and Tony Graffanino have higher OBPs this season. How about Tony Graffanino? I mean, he was only the leadoff hitter for most of this year. (DeJesus is out due to a bruised hand though) AVG/OBP/SLG means nothing though so few at-bats. Especially with Bautista, a Rule V guy who should be in the minors. And, of course, the Royals are being no-hit by Adam Eaton though 6.