King Cucaracha

He was routing for Jericho at Vengeance against Cena and Christian. Jericho had turned by then, right?

Brand new at [b]OAOAST.com[/b] [SIZE=4][COLOR=green][b]NOVEMBER REIGN 2008~![/b][/COLOR][/SIZE] on DVD! [IMG=http://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii59/KingCucaracha/NRdvd.jpg] [b]Featuring:[/b] The Entire Show... now THAT's G. [b]Plus:[/b] [list] [*][b]Bonus Audio Commentary Track[/b]- [i]Featuring Melody Nerdly, Josh Matthews and various special guests[/i] [*][b]Show Before The Show Match[/b]: Spencer Reiger vs. Tyler Bryant [*][b]Post Match Interviews[/b] [i]w/Disco Demolition, Tryst At Mardi Gras, Jade Rodez-Duncan, Cucaracha Internacional, Baron and Melody, Ragdoll, Zack Malibu, Krista Isadora Duncan, Mr. Dick, Leon Rodez, Tha Puerto Rican[/i] [*][b]Pre Show Interviews[/b] [i]w/The Deadly Alliance, The Cleveland Steamers, The Beverly Hills Blonds, Leon Rodez[/i] [*][b]Hype Videos[/b] [i]for: Leon vs. PRL, Krista and Mr. Dick, The BHB leaving The Enterprise, Jade vs. Malaysia[/i] [*][b]Jade and Maya at the High School Musical 3 Premiere[/b]- [i](HeldDOWN~!, 11/6)[/i] [*][b]Love Shack feat. PRL[/b]- [i](HeldDOWN~!, 11/13)[/i] [*][b]Jamie O'Hara and The CAE vs. Cucaracha Internacional[/b]- [i](HeldDOWN~!, 11/20)[/i] [*][b]The 2008 Thanksgiving Survivor Series Match[/b]- [i](HeldDOWN~!, 11/27)[/i] [*][b]A Molly Nerdly Film: A Nerdly Thanksgiving Dinner[/b] [*][b]Molly, Jade and Maya at the High School Musical 3 Premiere, Extended Featurette[/b] [/list] [b]ORDER NOW![/b]

I'm out of the loop so if it got changed, save it until whenever it happens. On their way to the ring, James Blonde and Faqu walk the hallways with Blonde busily going over instructions for his Samoan Wrecking Ball. As they approach the entrance stage they come to a sudden stop though. In their way stands LORELEI DECENZO, a smirk on her face. Faqu grunts at her and Blonde quickly calms him down. DECENZO A moment of your time? BLONDE Make it quick, we're on our way to the ring. DECENZO ...no kidding. Listen, you're facing Ned and Simon tonight and with their issues over image rights still presenting the OAOAST and The Enterprise with problems, it's within the best interests of everyone that they don't make the Anderson Cup final. So, to make sure you get the job done tonight, Mister Moneymaker has instructed me to offer you a little 'incentive bonus' for tonight. Reaching down the front of her dress, causing an eye-pop from Blonde, Lorelei produces a wad of hundred dollar bills. DECENZO Win and the money's yours. Simple. BLONDE Oh yeah? Where's Moneymaker right now? DECENZO Mister Moneymaker is... busy. BLONDE Right. Well, you can go back to wherever he's at and you can tell him from us, we are not impressed. Alright? We don't neeeed your dirty money! Because we've got all the inspiration we need right... [i]here[/i]! Blonde reaches into the inside pocket of his jacket and holds up a copy of the OAOAST Magazine... with Leon Rodez on the front cover. He grins away until Mackenzie's look of confusion registers. And he quickly turns the magazine over, remembering that the picture of Landon Maddix he wanted for his point is actually on the [i]back[/i] cover. BLONDE That's all the incentive we need, missy. We're going to win tonight and we're not going to win for Moneymaker or his money, we're gonna do it for Landon! We go to the Anderson Cup Final, win that, win the Tag Titles and win over the real power player in the OAOAST! That's far more important to me than that handful of green. DECENZO Adorable. Well, whatever, good luck. Not overly concerned about being unable to give money away, Lorelei shrugs her shoulders and stuffs the money back before walking off. Blonde lets out a deep breath at the sight of that, before going back to motivating Faqu.

I bought it. I sent a PM calling for your reinstatement man. I... fuck, it's late.

COLE The OAOAST Celtic Spectacular coming up in two weeks and we want to remind all of our great fans in New Orleans, the party capital of America, as well as those in the greatest Louisana area that tickets will go on sale this Saturday at the arena box-office for School's Out 2009. OAOAST World Champion Leon Rodez, Melody Nerdly, The Heavenly Rockers and Nawlins' own Lucius Soul will be there for a special meet and greet for our great fans. COACH But only those who buy tickets. No freeloaders! COLE Absolutely. A shrill scream suddenly shreds through the arena as the opening beats to "Makes Me Wonder" by Maroon 5 hits! Full of boyish charm and exuberance, Tyler Bryant bounds out onto the stage and runs across gesturing to one side of the crowd. After acknowledging the other side Tyler begins to handslap his way to the ring decked out in Cleveland Browns burnt orange coloured denim get-up. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is set for one fall and is for the OAOAST United States Championship! Coming to the ring at this time, the challenger. Hailing from Auburn Hills, Michigan... he weighs one hundred, ninety six pounds and is one half of D*LUX... "TREMENDOUS"... TTYYYYYYYLLLLLEEEEEERRRRRRR... BBRRRRRYYYYYYYYAAAAAAANNTT!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" Tyler slides into the ring and delights the females in the crowd further by whipping off his orange denim jacket. COLE A tremendous reaction for "Tremendous" Tyler! Ruffling his hair Tyler crouches down in his corner and tries to focus. COLE With the ongoing injury problems of "Showtime" Shayne, Tyler Bryant finds himself flying solo here in the OAOAST currently. And a fantastic opportunity to make the best of a bad situation here tonight and launch his singles career with a shot at the United States Championship. "Oh No" by Mos Def, Nate Dogg, and Pharoah Monche hits and the first time Nate Dogg shouts "Oh No", a quick burst of pyro shoots up from both sides of the ramp, showering Todd Cortez in sparkles as he stands preparing to walk down the aisle. BUFFER And introducing his opponent. Weighing in tonight at two hundred and twenty six pounds... and representing Cucaracha Internacional... he is the reigning and defending OAOAST UNITED STATES CHAMPION... "THE URBAN LEGEND"... TTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODD... CCOOOOOORRRRRRRRTTEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZ!!! "YYYEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH - BOOOOOOO!!" That somewhat mixed reaction is of no concern to Cortez as he walks up the ring steps. Stepping into the ring, Cortez climbs the turnbuckles and raises the US Title which is again met with mixed emotions. Todd steps down and removes his gold chain and cross, kissing it before handing it away. He then does the same with the US Title belt before going through some warm-ups. COLE As we see the US Champion limbering up, interesting goings-on in Cucaracha Internacional still. And the question remains, just what is Todd's status in the group? It's no secret Todd was never a willing member, but ever since dethroning Alfdogg he's gone from outcast to hero in Landon's eyes. COACH He's always been a hero to Landon. Why do you think he's spent so long trying to get Cortez to see sense? COLE But has he? Landon seems happy enough, but I really doubt Todd has forgiven and forgot all that's been done to him in the past year. Then again, who knows? *DINGDINGDING!* With both men ready the bell sounds and the match starts with a rare show of respect. COLE I doubt Landon would be too happy with that though. Locking up, Todd goes behind Tyler with a quick waistlock. Failing to find an escape Tyler is taken to the mat and Todd gets in some riding time on his opponent before Tyler is able to slip free and grab onto the bottom rope. Cortez lets the boybander up and they lock up again. COLE Cortez very technically sound, also very dangerous with his hands and feet. Tyler meanwhile will be hoping to use speed and agility. Standing toe to toe, not the way to combat The Urban Legend. After jockeying for position for a few seconds, Cortez works his way into a side headlock. Tyler twists out into a wristlock and wrings the arm but Cortez responds with a forearm to the face. And another one. Switching positions Cortez sends Tyler off into the ropes and sets himself, but too early, allowing Tyler to slip around the back with a waistlock of his own. Cortez finds an escape though. Dropping to a knee he snapmares Tyler over, then delivers a stinging kick to the back! "OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!" COACH Yeah, that's how the real men get down! Tyler grimaces in pain but gets back to his feet and fires back on Cortez with a forearm! COLE But Tyler Bryant, not backing down! Shaking it off, Cortez measures Tyler... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...for a knifedge chop. But Tyler again lands with a forearm in retaliation, then chops Cortez back. His opponent taking a step back, Tyler senses an opening but Todd closes it off with a hard kick to the quadriceps. Tyler hobbles as Cortez fires off another kick. And another. Cortez then leaves his feet with a jump spinning back kick to the chest, knocking Tyler down and forcing him to the floor to regroup. COLE There you go, Tyler trying to stand toe to toe and trying to show he's not intimidated. But Todd Cortez has that martial arts background and you've got to watch those feet. COACH Yeah, the only black belt Tyler's got is the one holding up those ugly pants of his. Tyler takes a bit of a walk to recover before he slides back into the ring, guarding a little more carefully now. Cortez pursues him up against the ropes looking for an opening to strike again. He does get one short kick in before Tyler shoves him away, Todd dropping down to the mat as Tyler looks for a clothesline. Coming off the ropes Tyler is scooped up, but floats over the back of Cortez and lands on his feet. With a waistlock he runs the US Champ into the ropes looking for a roll-up, blocked as Cortez hangs onto the top ring rope. Tyler rolls backwards to his feet, rolling forwards again to close the gap on his opponent, but Todd is still able to hurdle a dropdown attempt. As he comes off the far ropes a dropkick is un-avoidable and he gets nailed flush in the face! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" Now it's Cortez outside to regroup as Tyler gets the crowd fired up. COLE Nice dropkick and Tyler might not be done here. As Todd goes to re-enter the ring, Tyler rushes across the ring and wipes him out with a SUICIDE DIVE through the middle and top ropes!! COLE Tremendous Tyler taking a tremendous risk! And it brought tremendous rewards! COACH Stop saying tremendous. Dumping Cortez back inside, Tyler encourages the crowd before following Todd in for the pin... 1... 2... No! Tyler hooks Cortez on his way back up, delivering a vertical suplex. Another cover... 1... 2... No. Tyler backs Cortez up into a corner with some forearms, yelling out to the fans again before whipping Cortez across the ring. The challenger follows in with a flying avalanche, signalling for one more. However the whip is reversed on him. Heading for the turnbuckles Tyler shows, dare I say it, tremendous agility to leap to the top rope and leaps ba... NO! He fakes Todd out, hanging onto the turnbuckle and turning himself around up top. COLE Auburn Hills Fakeout and Todd bought it. With Todd picking himself off the mat Tyler now does take flight... but gets caught in mid-air with a spinning wheel kick!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Perhaps that was a Hollywood Boulevard fakeout? COACH Perhaps you are awful. Cortez hooks a leg and covers... 1... 2... No! Leading Tyler to his feet, Cortez unloads a kick combination targetting the back of the left leg with some more kicks. With his challenger unsteady Todd then sends him for a short whip, reeling him back into a Flapjack! The wind is knocked out of Tyler and he sits on his knees prone for a running kick to the chest, further emptying the lungs! Cover... 1... 2... No! Staying on the attack Cortez delivers a European uppercut. Tyler falls backwards into a corner, the ropes holding him up. A second European uppercut rocks him against the turnbuckles. As does a third, before Todd is backed off. COLE Todd Cortez showing anyone who might have forgotten just what he's capable of. We're talking a lot about people with points to prove recently and Todd is certainly one of them after the shackles put on his career by Cucaracha Internacional. COACH Sometimes people need shackling until they understand how to act and how not to act. COLE He's not a criminal! COACH Well that's another debate for another day. Once he's answered to the ref Cortez moves back in and whips Tyler out of the corner. This time there's no fakeout, only Tyler hitting the turnbuckles. Cortez follows in with a clothesline on Tyler, then scoops and slams him, heading for the top rope himself. COLE The US Champion more than capable of taking to the air himself. Cortez doesn't waste time on the top, coming down across Tyler's chest with a lung-busting double stomp!! A breathless groan escapes Tyler, as Cortez hooks him up for a pin... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Tyler sticking in this one, United States Championship is on the line here in Cleveland, Ohio! Cortez pulls Tyler back up again and it's clear the boybander is weakening. Again Cortez attacks the knees with some low kicks, leaving the challenger routed to the spot. Todd backs off the ropes and looks for a clothesline, but Tyler gets a foot up in the gut to cut him off! Backing up, Tyler comes off the ropes. Up and over with a leapfrog goes Cortez, Tyler baseball sliding underneath. Cortez lands and tries for his clothesline again. As he rushes back though, he's caught with a Yakuza Kick from "Tremendous" Tyler!! "YYYEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!" COLE Oh, what a shot that was! That could be the turning point for Tyler! He's unable to capitalise though as both men stay down. "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" The referee gets to the count of '6' before the two men begin to stir. Tyler strikes first, connecting with a dynamic right hand! A second right hand finds the mark! And a third, Todd dazed and left wide open for a standing dropkick. COLE Tyler beginning to take the fight to Todd Cortez, with that youthful exuberance. COACH Okay, let's hope that one doesn't catch on. Youthful exuberance!? Finding himself in a corner as he gets to his feet Cortez is penned in by Tyler, who climbs to the middle rope and calls on the crowd to count along with his latest Top Ten Hit! "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FIVE!" "SIX!" "SEVE - " ...NO! Cortez suddenly lifts Tyler off the mat, carrying him into the middle of the ring... ...but before he can execute the Crotch Droppah, Tyler kicks and squirms his way over the back with a sunset flip takedown... 1... 2... NO! Both men roll back to their feet and Tyler ducks underneath an elbow strike, hitting the ropes. But Cortez snatches him off his feet with a Sitout Spinebuster!! 1... 2... NO! COLE What a competitive battle we're seeing here on HeldDOWN~! between these two men! Crouched over Todd recoups some energy waiting for Tyler to get back up, snatching him by the throat once back to his feet. He takes Tyler up looking for the chokeslam bomb, but Tyler turns into the move and rolls Cortez up... 1... 2... NO! Tyler rolls back to his feet and loads up with a forearm, but Cortez beats him to it with a boot to the gut. He reels Tyler in and gives the signal, to a murmuring of excitement. COACH Read him the Riot Act! But Tyler backdrops the US Champion over and saves himself! COLE No, Tyler with that sickflip piledriver scouted. Waving Cortez back to his feet Tyler throws himself forward with a SHINING ENZIGURI! He makes the cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Only two, so close to a new United States Champion! COACH Cortez better get his stuff together and do it fast. That is unless he wants to find himself back on the Cucaracha Internacional sidelines. Despite only getting a two count it's clear confidence is running high through Tyler as he calls for the finish. Todd gets back up holding his head and gets scooped up in a fireman's carry by the boybander, an excited scream from the fans going up. With a shout of "YEAH-UH~!", Tyler takes a step forward and swings the US Champion out... ...and out of his grip! Cortez escapes the TKO, landing on his feet and hooking Tyler up for a German Suplex, with a bridge! 1... 2... NO!! COLE Another close nearfall, this time for the champion! The Cleveland fans show their respect with some applause as both men take a second to recover. Cortez is up first and draws Tyler in, connecting with the Crotch Droppah this time. COACH And listen to the thousands of hearts breaking in the stands. Tailbone jarred Tyler is left hurting in the centre of the ring while Cortez vaults himself over the top rope and to the apron. Cortez then springboards back in with a crossbody... BUT MISSES, as Tyler ducks! The US Champion holds his ribs as he gets back to his feet, walking into a boot to the gut. Tyler takes a quick glance around before he turns back to back with the doubled over Urban Legend and hooks up the arms. He turns Todd over and elevates him for the Recordbreaker... ...but Cortez rolls down the back and lands on his feet! COLE Nice escape. Tyler turns around, into a boot of his own. As he doubles up Tyler is pulled in, Cortez wasting no time on this ocassion as he flips him over AND SPIKES HIM ON HIS HEAD WITH THE RIOT ACT PLUS~!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE HE GOT IT! And nobody kicks out of the Riot Act Plus, what a devestating manoeuver! All allegience to Tyler goes out the window at the sight of the amazing piledriver and the fans count along with Todd's cover... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING!* COLE A fine effort from Tyler, but not to be tonight. Todd climbs off of Tyler and has his hand raised in victory, his 'celebrations' very business like. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match and STILL OAOAST UNITED STATES CHAMPION... "THE URBAN LEGEND"... TTOOOOOOOODD CCOOOOORRRRRRRRTTEEEEEEZZZZZZZZ!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" Handed his title Cortez scales the turnbuckles and raises the belt to the crowd. The mixed reaction is slightly less mixed and more appreciative now. COLE After a great back and forth contest, it's Todd Cortez successfully defending his United States Title.

Man, I didn't realise we were all so damn old. You know, except me. Anyway, yeah, show will be up some time tommorrow, delayed I'm afraid as there's certain things I've got to take care of tonight. Card-wise... well, we'll think about that later I guess, but if anyone's got booking requests might as well get them in now.

To be fair King's still capable of having his moments. The problem is, WWE don't have heel commentators anymore. That was really King's strong suit and I think he's lost a certain amount of emotional investment in matches. He still gets a joke in here and there, but it's not his role anymore.

Leena banned him. If he's not going to be allowed back, we'll discuss how we go forward in due course. For now, if anyone's got his e-mail and can get in contact with him, that'd be much appreciated. EDIT: In other words, leave it with me for now.

We need Alfdogg back at the bottom of the board. And yeah yeah, I know you don't care about the e-feds and so on, but even so.

Good job I didn't write the promo with Krista I was going to!

US Title Todd Cortez vs. Tyler Bryant

I'm not saying it's not possible, or even probable. It's just that previous experience has told me it's not something to hang your hat on.

Updated again. Team CZW is Beef Wellington and Greg Excellent, aka 2 Girls 1 Cup, although not in CHIKARA I'm sure! Plus Pinkie Sanchez. Second team in is Al Snow, Iceberg and Glacier. Really. Insane.

Their = they're. But don't tell anybody. The board will implode under grammar bitching within a week.

People have been predicting their death for years now, pretty much ever since their first show. If I had a pound for every time somebody's posted "I gave it six months before they fold" on this board... Not to say it won't happen, but many people have been wrong on many ocassions. I guess the mantra is "one of us has got to be right at some point!" TNA = the Jake Roberts of wrestling companies?

Matthews is calling FCW with Scotty Goldman right now. I would love to hear their stuff. I've heard Colt do commentary before and... it's not his strongest suit. He's okay, but not as good as you'd naturally assume.

LEGEND KILLER Welcome to 5 years ago.

I think Josh and Striker would be too much. It's cute when one of them makes insider references, but both of them for one hour? It'd be like watching a bad indy show.

BALLGAME!

Why are people considering Austin vs. Orton? I know it's in Texas, which seems to be the arguement for everything for some reason I can't quite fathom, but... just no. Aside from Austin's physical condition dragging down his performance, is there really anything for Orton to gain from beating a long retired wrestler? Also, Orton won the Rumble, so unless you want Austin to win one of the titles, let's move on.

183 Not a great week. Didn't help that I couldn't walk anywhere for ice for most of the time.

"Hoops Globetrotter"

Not to be 'that guy', but does the draft even matter anymore, considering certain talent just floats between shows as and when required? Not to mention the guys who've offically switched brands, like Burchill, Noble, Matt Hardy. So I wouldn't panic too much over guys moving. Aside from the main-eventers, who only appear on other shows on special occasions and the announcers, who only appear on other shows on special occasions unless you're Todd Grisham in which case you can appear on Raw and ECW, after a couple of months people will go back to roaming and everything'll be back to normal.

No sweat, I've got it covered. Ie., I was struggling on a finish anyway and I was probably going to do something 'cheap' like a DQ (SPOILER!), so no harm no foul. Bo, request noted.

Yeah, but it's too late to have him go on a winter losing streak.