King Cucaracha

Bret Hart vs. Mr. Perfect King Of The Ring 1993, King Of The Ring Semi-Final Match I was tempted to let this go another pick, since it's kind of a forgotten gem. A match I always preferred to their first match at Summerslam. That one had more historical significance, but this was probably the better wrestling match. Throw in the pre-match interview between the two just for the "my dad could beat your dad" arguement for good measure.

Apparantly it's the Moonsault Belly To Belly from the top. I can't remember ever hearing it called that, but whatever. CYCLORAMA~! The standing moonsault would work as a finisher, if only on the basis he does it better than anybody else.

Yeah, but who's more likely to connect with the audience quicker, the son of a former wrestler or some guy from the indies? Who's got a ready-made debut angle? Listen, I'm a huge Matt Sydal fan and I'll be watching ECW purely for him this week. But bringing up Cody first was going to happen. Maybe it's just hope on my part, but I don't think Sydal will be pure enhancement for long. I'd imagine the role he played in the training of Mayweather for Wrestlemania will play in his favour with management. The problem will be what moves he has left if he does get bumped full-time. Melina's got his legdrop takedown move, Miz has his corner clothesline through the ropes, can't see many people taking the Here It Is Driver, Shooting Star Press is going to be an issue... FroGG- You should try and watch the Sydal/Jack Evans match from WSX's 1st show, although I'm not sure if it's online anywhere or not.

It was a toss-up between HBK/HHH and Angle/Rey for me.

Brought to you by American Express Taped: May 29th, 2008 First air date: June 1st, 2008 (check local listings for airings in your area) Announce team: Tony Schiavone and Jesse "The Body" Ventura Lead correspondent: Tony Brannigan It's no longer the weekend, which means that Syndicated must already have happened and this recap must already be a little late! But, as they say, good things come to those who wait. And it doesn't come much more 'good' than Syndicated. As ever Tony Schiavone and Jesse "The Body" Ventura are our guides through the action which justifies the price of those HD taping tickets as we approach The Great Angle Bash. This week would see The Love Doctors in action, Cuban Wall in a handicap match with the protectors of law and justice Rescue 911 and in the main event, Jamie O'Hara looking for retribution against The Heavenly Rockers in the form of Logan Mann, one on one! Who needs The Great Angle Bash with that kinda line-up, huh!? Syndicated would start with some reel talk from The Beverly Hills Blonds, in the ring with Tony Brannigan. Or, so we thought. Ned Blanchard and Simon Singleton came to the ring casually enough to join their former nemesis, but the arrival of referee Nick Patrick seemed to confuse them both. Ned soon regretted asking Patrick what he wanted, as T-Bod explained that due to a change in the card, he was actually in competition tonight rather than on microphone. Cue "Sweet Home Chicago" and bad news for Ned Blanchard. ***Ned Blanchard w/Simon Singleton -VS- Jumbo w/Deuce Deuce Bigelow*** Jumbo was smart enough to bring back up in the form of The Flaming Gigolo and they cleared the ring of The BHB, who bailed out to try and make sense of all this. Eventually Simon got Ned revved up and ready to confront Jumbo. Only then did Ned realise the true scale of the size difference. A series of failed shoulder blocks from Ned were followed by an example in how to do it by Jumbo, pinballing Ned around the ring. All to little concern from Simon, who having neglected to bring the Siclopse with him highjacked a regular OAOAST camera and caught the action on that. That of course meant we could hear every worried groan from The Video Voyeur as Ned continued to be bounced around from pillar to post by the big guy. Eventually, a missed Avalanche gave Ned a window into the match and he clipped Jumbo's knee before going to work. After softening the right leg up, Blanchard applied a Spinning Toehold looking for a submission. Jumbo was strong enough to drag himself to the ropes however, leaving Ned at a loss for what to do. More legwork was his eventual conclusion. A second Spinning Toehold almost saw him pinned from an inside cradle though. Ned soon found himself struggling to keep Jumbo down and the big guy rallied with Deuce willing him on and Simon providing a gloomy running commentary on camera. Even on one leg, Jumbo's size allowed him to bounce Ned around with right hands and shoulder tackled before he hit his Avalanche that went wrong earlier. Jumbo then went for the XL Splash, but missed and jarred his knee on landing. Another chopblock from Ned set him up for a top rope elbow. But Jumbo moved out of the way and Ned proved why he rarely takes flight from the top by plummeting into nothing but canvas. Jumbo hit a Belly to Belly Suplex for 2, then a big Powerslam for 2, at which point Simon had seen enough. Putting down the camera, he jumped to the apron to run interference. Not having any of it was Deuce, pulling Simon down from the apron and punching away. That proved costly, as Ned's attempted sneak attack was avoided by Jumbo. Ducking the 90210 Enziguri, he caught Blanchard with a sternum crushing Samoan Drop, followed up with the XL Splash to score an upset 3 count that Simon couldn't do anything to prevent! An overjoyed Jumbo and Deuce celebrated their victory, while Simon attended to the squashed Ned. Winner: Jumbo, via pinfall THE GREAT ANGLE BASH 2008 June 29th, Minneapolis, MN LIVE on Pay-Per-View! When we came back from commercial, The Beverly Hills Blonds were still out in the arena and not happy. Converging on the announce table, they whined about unfair treatment from the OAOAST office and AngleSault in particular. Ned's claims that he hadn't properly stretched and been through his pre-match routine were mercifully cut off by Syndicated's producers. That's because we went to footage from earlier in the night with Rescue 911. The upstanding citizens of the OAOAST were preparing for their match later on in slightly contrasting fashion. As EMT Tim put on his ring gear calmly and serenely, his calm and serenity was punctured by Officer Bosley's own pre-match preperations. In front of a full length mirror borrowed, with permission and full documentation of course, from the women's locker room Officer Bosley stared himself down. After a good 10 seconds of staring, he then started giving himself the peptalk of a lifetime at the top of his voice! "AIN'T NO MAN IN THIS WORLD GONNA TAKE YOU DOWN!" he screamed at his own reflection. "YOU ARE A DISCIPLE OF GOD! HE GAVE YOU THIS CHISELED PHYSIQUE TO TEAR THE WORLD'S WRONG-DOERS A SECOND ASSHOLE AND GODDAMN IT ALL THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE GONNA FREAKIN' DO!" After all the intensity and a few slaps of his own face, Bosley turned to EMT Tim and his his normal, everyday voice told him "Let's roll", before leaving with a slightly unnerved Cash close behind. Two-On-One Handicap Match ***Cuban Wall -VS- Rescue 911*** Would the psyche-job do any good though? Or would The Cuban Wall prove too much? Rescue 911 were required to tag in and out during the match, so it was Bosley who started out with the 2008 Lethal Rumble winner. Wall was in just as intense a mood as Bosley in his first match since the acrimonious disbanding of The Stephen Joseph Popick Corporation. And a shouting match ensued before the two traded big bombs in the centre of the ring. Wall got the better of the fist-fight, but the trained Police Officer had more than that in his arsenal and attacked the leg with kicks. Quick tags allowed 911 to work Wall over for a few minutes. But EMT Tim got caught taking too long with an arm wringer and was decimated with a short arm clothesline. Bosley bellowed at his partner to "man up", as Wall systematically started to pick him apart with heavy punches. Tim was no match in size for Wall and was laid to waste by the big Cuban with a Chokeslam. Sensing trouble, Bosley discarded the rules briefly to come in and help. But Wall landed a Big Boot and sent Bosley packing. Grabbing hold of the EMT, Wall quickly executed the Wallbreaker. Then, with Cash already done for, he delivered the as yet un-renamed Lightning Crew Splash to pick up the victory. Winner: Cuban Wall, via pinfall After the match, Wall found the nearest camera and sent a worrying message that this was "just the start", while Bosley was clearly unhappy in the ring but still managed to help his partner up while wondering how he got beat without him. ***The Love Doctors -VS- The Last Kings Of Scotland*** Tag team action for the Doctors Of Doctornomics, up against Scotland's own Scottish Scott and Danny Boy. The Love Docs were on top form and showed the great cohesion that made them HI-YAH Tag Champions for so long. Pigley, advertising his local Chicago radio show The Love Line on his shirt, and Anderson gave Scott the run around and connecting with a Double Dropkick, Double Hiptoss and Lariat/schoolyard trip combination before Danny Boy was able to even get in. He didn't fare much better. He did at least take the fight to Dr. Anderson. But pretty soon The Docs were working together and implementing quick tags. After delivering The Lovematic Grampa (Inverted Atomic Drop/Dropkick) on Danny Boy, Scottish Scott came in but was soon shocked with the Defibrillator (Hart Attack Clothesline). With one man isolated, Dr. Anderson delivered his Anderson Spinebuster. Scooping him up, Dr. Anderson then held Danny Boy in place for the seated senton from Dr. Pigley, the Gurney To The Centre Of The Earth capping a routine victory for The Love Docs. Winner: The Love Doctors, via pinfall NEXT WEEK ON HELDDOWN~! THE MATCH OF CHAMPIONS~! World Heavyweight Champion, US Champion and Tag Team Champions combine as Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat team with Team Heyross, to take on World 6-Man Tag Champions Cucaracha Internacional and the OAOAST Heartland Champion Sandman9000! Plus, a first appearance from Bohemoth, after defeating Zack Malibu at School's Out! What will he have to say?And will Zack be there? ***Logan Mann -VS- Jamie O'Hara*** After his defeat two weeks ago at the hands of Logan's partner Synth Abdul Jabbar, it was revenge on the mind for Jamie O'Hara in your Syndicated main event. And it was ensured that things would be a lot easier this week, as right away the crew of Synth, Abdullah Abir Nerdly and Holly-Wood were all dispatched to the back by the OAOAST security team. Abdullah's cries of foul against AngleSault grew fainter and fainter as he was dragged away and a fuming Logan was rolled up for a close two count mere seconds into the match. Forced to regroup, Logan exited to the floor to try and get his head together and a new gameplan formulated. All he really succeeded in doing was providing a landing pad for the high-flying O'Hara, who delivered a huge Springboard 450 Plancha to ignite the Wilks-Barre crowd! On offence, O'Hara dumped The MACHO Macho Mann back inside and worked him over with forearms and a variety of kicks. J'OH ran Logan ragged with his speed, until finally getting caught with a high-risk move. Looking for a hurricanrana out of the corner, O'Hara got his feet caught up in the ropes which possibly aided Logan in countering by falling backwards to deliver snake-eyes on the top turnbuckle! Logan peppered O'Hara's body with jabs to let out his frustrations and got a warning from the referee. Of course, that did little good. From that point on Logan picked apart O'Hara with the jabs between big moves. His own high-risk paid off as he delivered a double axehandle from the top, but he only got a 2 count from the resulting pin. As Logan continues to dominate, he eventually started to get more confident and more concerned with the crowd. For which he paid, as O'Hara escaped a fireman's carry lift and dropped him on his head with an Inverted Hurricanrana!! Both men took advantage of an 8 count from the referee before getting to their feet and renewing their fight. O'Hara's second wind kicked in and he again out-quicked Logan with an array of high-flying moves, but couldn't find one to keep him down for three. Not even a Standing 450 Splash could get that three count. So, O'Hara set Logan up for his trusty 630 Splash. Mann recovered to crotch O'Hara up top though. Climbing up with O'Hara, Logan brought nervous jeers from the crowd as he twirled the finger, signalling for some unheard of top rope Percussion. Luckily, O'Hara broke free and shoved Logan down to the unforgiving canvas. Unluckily, he then went for the 630, but landed on KNEES! With O'Hara struck by crippling pain the wily Logan then quickly stacked the Englishman up on his shoulders, in the perfect position to supplement the pin with TWO FEET ON THE ROPES without the referee spotting him, in order to score the unpopular pinfall victory! Winner: Logan Mann, via pinfall Logan escaped without detection and celebrated his victory, leaving the pained O'Hara to complain to the referee about what happened as Syndicated went off the air.

I think that's a little harsh. So far, yeah that might be the case. But that's as much down to his opponents as anything else. Chavo was a mis-matched opponent and with Show there's a- a track record of them having some bad matches and b- the "these two guys are both big, this is probably gonna suck" mentality of some people. I don't think that's all Kane's fault, neccessarily. Personally I think it'll be okay. Show is as said above in great shape but also as popular as he's maybe ever been. Plus, they haven't worked together in a year or two so there'll at least be some interest in it.

With GAB '91, you at least have a few decent match. Sting vs. Nikita, Gibson vs. Morton and the Freebirds vs. Rhodes and Young Pistols 6-man are all fine. The dead crowd really doesn't help and the choice of 'main-event' was downright bizarre, but there are a few PPVs with far less going for them.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio Summerslam 2002 Maybe the best opening match on WWE PPV, ever. Hot crowd, excellent action, very entertaining.

Wow, I'm kinda shocked this one's still on the board. Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon WWF WrestleMania X, WWF Intercontinental Title Ladder Match I personally think it still holds up well, even with what this match eventually spawned with the popularity of the Ladder Match gimmick. Add in the historical context and it's one of the essential matches of the 90s.

Plus it looked like JBL popped the capsule early, before Cena even got the chain around his neck. So basically, the First Blood Match ended with internal bleeding via drop toehold. Having not seen WrestleMania, this was probably the best PPV of the year IMO. Maybe because it had something different going for it, unlike the endless stream of shows with the same matches that just blend together. Maybe because finally some of these endless feuds might have ended already. Maybe because they actually surprised me in the main event. Who knows? I think the moral of the show is, don't get new theme music. One of Kennedy's many bad spells came right around the time, Hardy ended up suspended within weeks and now Orton's out of commission within weeks.

THE MATCH OF CHAMPIONS!! World Heavyweight Champion Tha Puerto Rican, United States Champion Colombian Heat and World Tag Team Champions Team Heyross -VS- Heartland Champion Sandman 9000 and World 6-Man Tag Team Champions Nathaniel Black, James Blonde and Faqu

Beth Pheonix showed more personality in five minute last week on Raw than she has done in her entire time in the WWE. It's amazing what giving someone who can talk mic-time can do huh? See also, Cody Rhodes. And The Miz and Morrison. You know, this goes beyond 'stop having people reading from scripts'... the WWE as a whole really need to loosen up and let wrestlers express themselves if they want them to get over. It's clear that's what's happened with Santino. The most amusing thing I've seen on WWE programming in weeks was on that recap on the Mexico tour, where Kennedy was playing that street organ and randomly yelled out Kennedy during this tinny tune as if it were his theme music. Was it that funny? Maybe not, but it was... spontanious. Who, besides Santino, is spontanious anymore? Or allowed to be spontanious?

Shit. Ravenbomb took my damn Punk/Delirious match! I figured that'd be a lock late teens pick, I didn't reckon on any other indy heads. Although, they did have three matches in the series...

Sorry guys, as Toxx said weekends aren't my thing. I had planned on sending the winning match to Toxxic Friday night before I vanished but wasn't able to, but for what it's worth IL's match just edged it with me as well. Very tough though, may even have been a harder decision than IL/Alexander match last month.

With my next pick, I'm taking a match maybe not so high on quality, but that delivered on entertainment... The Rock vs. Hulk Hogan WrestleMania X8, Icon vs. Icon Even if you're not a huge Hulk Hogan fan, the reaction from the crowd in Toronto is still something special. I think at this point it was beyond a WWF crowd to be expected to boo Hulk Hogan for being a heel, especially at WrestleMania. Nostalgia took over and it was a true memorable WrestleMania match because of it.

I've got at least two I'm waiting on.

Okay, for some reason I'm blanking on '#1 pick' matches that I really treasure. So rather than go for a big main-event level match-up yet, I'm going instead for... Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio Jr. WCW Halloween Havoc 1997, WCW Cruiserweight Title, Mask vs. Title Match Such a well worked match, probably the best cruiserweight match in US wrestling history. Eddie plays the perfect heel, Rey is at his best as the underdog. They don't just go out and do moves for the sake of doing moves and the crowd are gradually drawn in by the action and story as opposed to big moves, which pretty much sets it apart from again most US cruiserweight matches. It's just a great match. What better reasoning is there?

Back on HeldDOWN~!, where two men in gold PVC bodysuits and wearing gold facepaint in the ring. Not neccessarily 'only in professional wrestling', although maybe at this hour. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall. In the ring, from Santa Fe, New Mexico by way of Tijuana, Mexico... weighing one hundred, sixty five pounds... CONQUISTADOR UUUUUNNOOOOO!! Confusingly, both Conquistadors raise their fists into the sky. COLE We'd like to take this opportunity to thank all of you who ordered School's Out 2008 this past Sunday... mainly because we have nothing to say about Los Conquistadors. COACH It's true. Them's killer lame. As the poor referee Mike Chioda tries to decide which Conquistador is which without them speaking a word of English, the crowd come to life as "Rock The Casbah" by Trust Company strikes up. Sweeping his purple and black robe through the entrance way is of course Leon Rodez, picture framing his perfectly styled hair-do before he glides on down to the ring. BUFFER And his opponent! From Grand Rapids, Michigan... weighing two hundred, eighteen pounds. "THE GRAND RAPIDS GOLDEN CHILD"... ladies and gentlemen, he is "SILKY SMOOTH"... LLLLLLEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOONN... RRRRRRRROOOOOOODDEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZ!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Leon jumps to the ring apron and blows a kiss to the people before entering the ring. COLE Speaking of School's Out, Leon coming off a big victory over Jock Mulligan and he seems to be in a great mood tonight. Even with all the conflict between girlfriend Maggie and friend Melody going on. *DINGDINGDING* Disrobed and ready to go, Leon squares up to whichever Conquistador has volunteered to be Uno tonight. They lock-up and Leon quickly grabs a side headlock. Behind he goes with a hammerlock, out in front with a snapmare and then right back into the side headlock. LEON How was that? CHIODA (confused) Yeah, not bad. Uno climbs back to his feet and goes to the midsection with a right hand. And another one. Uno then wrings out the arm and puts Leon into a top wristlock. Not panicing, Leon calls Chioda over because he 'just might quit', only to then grab his collar, using him to assist in a backflip, into an armdrag to send Uno right out of the ring! LEON How was that? CHIODA Stay off my shirt Leon, come on! That's not legal and you know it. LEON Yeah, okay Mike, no touchy... how's my hair looking? Sliding back into the ring with an assist from Dos, Uno charges towards Rodez with his hands clasped. Leon sidesteps the double axehandle nonchalantly and Uno ends up charging into a corner. Hitting the turnbuckles sternum first, he staggers out and The Silky Smooth One hooks him up, hitting an Exploder Suplex! Cover... 1... 2... No! COACH Leon looks pretty relaxed considering his two girlfriends are wrestling each other later on. COLE Not just each other, but the mammoth Malaysia as... wait, [i]two[/i] girlfriends? Come on, Coach! Leon takes his time about following up, letting Uno back up. Irish whip sends Uno to the ropes, Leon performing a leapfrog on him on the way back. Leon pulls off another leapfrog, just for fun. He then takes the Conquistador over with a Sitout Hiptoss... 1... 2... No! COACH So, who do you reckon loverboy'll be pulling for tonight? COLE I really don't think all this speculation is helping matters. COACH Yeah, you're probably right. Oh, I almost forgot, I've got a book running on which Nerdly sister he's going to doink next. Very competitive odds. But, we'll talk later. Leon backs Uno into a corner... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and lays into him with a chop. That stings his hand a little though, so he decides to leave it at uno and instead whip Uno across the ring. Uno lands in the opposite corner and Leon jogs out, performing a leapfrog on an imaginary figure because the last two were just so enjoyable, then lunging into Uno's midsection with the SUPERMAN SPEAR! Leon lands on hands and knees, jumping back up and pulling Uno out of the corner. Double leg pick-up and a RUNNING Inverted Atomic Drop, jarring Uno's spine in the centre of the ring. COLE What price can I get for Madison? *ahem*...I mean, uh, big atomic drop! Off the ropes, Leon tucks and rolls, before delivering The Shack Attack clothesline! COLE With the confidence Leon's carrying from School's Out, this is virtually an exhibition. COACH Yeah. This is almost Krista levels. All we're missing is a show-tune, an obscure pictoral reference and ten more minutes of sonning and it'd be uncanny! With the crowd behind him, Leon grabs a hold of Uno and helps him back to his feet. Scooping him at the side, The Grand Rapids Golden Child carries the Conquistador over to one corner of the ring and delivers a backbreaker before signalling that he's heading to the top. The Wilkes-Barre crowd rise to their feet, knowing what's coming. Leon glides up the turnbuckles and wastes little time up top, tumbling onto Uno with the patented 450 SPLASH!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Too much mercy. Registers only a .3 on the Krista scale. 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING!* BUFFER Your winner of the match... "SILKY SMOOTH"... LLEEEEEEEOOOOOOOONN RRRROOOOOOODDEEEEEZZZZZ!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" Hand raised in victory, Leon seems almost apologetic as he shrugs his shoulders. COLE Comprehensive stuff from Leon Rodez, on a roll in the OAOAST! Leon bails out of the ring and tags some hands on the way to the back, only stopping to get some reassurances about his hair from the nearest cameraman.

We go back into the locker rooms to find Leon Rodez in the middle of gelling up his hair, ready to face the public. As he dilligently curls at his hair trying to get it just right, another face appears in the mirror. That of Jade Rodez, who being Leon's niece and having spent most of her life thinking she was his little sister (seriously, I'm still a little confused about all that, I think that sentence sums it up okay though), isn't entirely surprised. JADE Busy? LEON (still concentrating) Yeah, not bad thanks, how are you? JADE ...yeah, I'll just sit down. Slumping into the nearest seat, Jade kicks back expecting a long wait. She absent-mindedly rubs at her bandaged right elbow, until Leon is finally satisfied and pulls himself away from his reflection. JADE And we are back! LEON So, let me guess, Krista's in make-up and you're in here hiding from Maya? JADE I don't [i]hide[/i] from Maya! LEON That's not how she tells it. Not that I have any communication with her, but she and Shayne have each other's MySpace pages bookmarked and he left his laptop logged on at the hotel the other week. By the way, if you find yourself running to the toilet alot next time you gals order Thai, I've got a theory as to why. *taps nose* JADE I'm not even going to ask what your original plans for using the laptop were, but it does give me a good lead-in to what I wanted to talk to you about. By the way, my arm's fine, thanks for asking. Leon smiles awkwardly as he clearly just now notices the bandage. JADE Trust me when I say that getting involved in your love life is the last thing I wanna be doing. There's threads there that simply don't need to be pulled on. Who knows what that's going to cost me in counselling fees... although, I guess I could just ask Krista's, she's a nice enough woman and she's around the house quite a lot really. But, anyway. Far be it from me to get involved with your personal life, but somebody's got to do it. And since Shayne and Tyler are way too immature to talk to you about relationships without bowing at your feet, also quite disturbing, it might as well be me doing the talking. Now, I think we can both agree we've had more than enough secrets causing rifts between the two of us these past few months. So, [i]truthfully[/i]. Is there anything going on with you and Melody? LEON Oh, Jade. Not you as well! JADE Leon, is there or isn't there? LEON No! Of course there's not. Maggie's just got the wrong idea, that's all. Still looking a little sceptical, Jade looks for any signs of wavering from her uncle. He's keeping it together though. JADE Okay, but can ya blame her, really? Come on Le', you've gotta admit you're spending a LOT of time with Melody recently. LEON Well... there might be some truth to that. We're friends. That's what friends do. I just feel a lot more comfortable around Melody. There's no pressure to be the ice cool pimp of life the outside world knows me as, ya know. I can just be... 'me'. She gets me. JADE That's because 'you' are an idiot nerd. And so is she. LEON Ouch. Leon pretends to be wounded, but he's getting no sympathy from Jade who stands up. JADE So you're just going to stand back and let them both keeping fighting over you? LEON Look, I'd love to talk this out. But I've got a really important match to prepare for tonight. Just then, one of the production crew members sticks his head in the door. PRODUCTION GUY Leon, your match with Conquistador Uno is up next. Jade folds her arms. LEON What? He's the number one Conquistador! Because... you know, uno means one, and all that. Worked his way all the way up from Conquistador Sesenta y Ocho. Look, don't judge me, okay. With his best storm-off, which admittedly isn't great, Leon leaves and Jade just sighs.

Our memories take a warming trip back to the 80s as we take a trip backstage to the OAOAST Update Center! Stood at the OAOAST Wrestling podium, a platinum backdrop with a shadowed figure performing the ankle lock on some poor soul smack in the center, is Tony Schiavone, same suit, same microphone but unfortunately missing that kickin' moustache he used to have. SCHIAVONE Fans, Tony Schiavone here with a late breaking announcement directly from OAOAST management. An historic match has just been signed for next week's edition of HeldDOWN~!, live on TSM, when we will be eminating from Trenton, New Jersey. In a first of it's kind, ALL the title holders in the OAOAST will compete in one match, The Match Of Champions! It will be the World 6-Man Tag Team Champions Cucaracha Internacional and the Heartland Champion Sandman9000, teaming together to take on World Tag Team Champions Team Heyross, teaming with United States Champion Colombian Heat and the World's Heavyweight Champion himself, Tha Puerto Rican! A mouth-watering prospect to say the least. And with that in mind, at this time I'd like to bring in Cucaracha Internacional... On cue, in walk five of the members of The CI. The aforementioned 6-Man Tag Champs, James Blonde, Nathaniel Black and Faqu assembled at the back with a very sour-faced Landon Maddix at the front with Megan Skye. SCHIAVONE ...and we'll get to The Match Of Champions in just a second, but also Landon Maddix, this past Sunday night unsuccessful in your quest for the World Title. MADDIX Thanks for the reminder. Let's get the facts in order, first off. Number one, I'm not angry and I'm not bitter. No, what I am is [i]disappointed[/i]. I'm disappointed that despite not being pinned or made to submit last Sunday, I'm not standing here the OAOAST World Champion. I'm disappointed that Todd Cortez lost that match for me. Even more-so, I'm disappointed in Todd Cortez for screwing our chances up even before the opening bell by not listening and sticking to the plan. I think it can be generally agreed on, that since I got Cucaracha Internacional together, we've had some ups and downs. Usually ending with us landing on our feet. And the reason for that is... we don't take disappointment well. Shakes of the head all around agree with Landon. MADDIX When Todd Cortez stood up against me, I put him back in his place. When we were stripped of the World 6-Man Titles, we regrouped and we won them back at AngleMania. Disappointment is something that gets us going, because we're winners. And we sure don't stay disappointed for long. Why? Cause we're always looking for the first opportunity to make things right. SCHIAVONE Which brings us to next week? MADDIX That's right, The Match Of Champions! And lo and behold if that doesn't prove my point, with Cucaracha Internacional heavily represented. If this is going to be The Match Of Champions, then we're clearly The Team Of Champions. Right after I heard the news about this match, I tracked down Alfdogg and we had what I'd call a very productive conversation with him. The upshot being, for one night only, [i]this[/i] is going to be the deadliest alliance going! We'll be delighted to welcome Sandman9000 into the fold for the night. Cohesion isn't going to be a problem. And neither will motivation. Because, look who we've got on the opposition... none other than one 'Puerto Rican Lightning'. It's funny how these things work out, huh? Blonde pulls the microphone towards him from over Schiavone's shoulder. BLONDE That's right. And PRL, lemme promise you one thing, Landon Maddix isn't going to be in that ring across from you, but he'll be there in spirit! Every shot you take is gonna have the Cucaracha calling card slapped on it. And there'll be plenty of slapping, pal! You see, you're an embarrassment in my eyes. So unoriginal. So uninspired. The Trendsetter doesn't follow trends like you do, he sets them. And the trend set next week is gonna be blond guys who rule kicking your ass! MADDIX I like the sounds of that. And hey, maybe we might not even limit it to gender and we'll let Megan slap you around some as well? It'll be the most female action you've had since Lindsay bolted! But, what of Tha Puerto Rican's partners? BLONDE Ah yeah, you've got Team Heyross, the supposed best tag team in the world today. The fact is, we're the true international superstars of the OAOAST. And when we're through with you next week, Faqu and I would be happy to prove it... if there's anything left of you! FAQU O LE LIMA E PAIA LE MATA!! Despite not having a clue what their Samoan friend just said, Blonde and Landon laugh it up, as Black now pulls the mic his way. BLACK An' who does that leave? Colombian 'Eat, the United States Champion. Ya know what 'Eat, you make a great US Champ, no matter wot anybody says. Maybe that's why I 'ate ya both! Sure, you ain't a Yankee, but you still stand for everythin' I 'ate about the US. No dignity, no morals, an' definately no class! You're all style over substance, which is why all these American fans love ya so much, 'cause of all the razzmatazz. Well son, once me an' our team beat your arse next week, the world's gonna see what subtance over style's about. An' then, maybe somewhere down the line, I'll do the honourable thing for the OAOAST and restore some class, by takin' that belt off of ya... and renamin' it the [i]British[/i] Heavyweight Title! MADDIX Which leaves us right back with Tha Puerto Rican. Seems like my boys have got their sights set and Sandman's probably busy doing something, I dunno, I only even heard of him because of this match... SO, it only makes sense to go four for four. Whether it's a month down the line, two months, three, sooner or later I'm going to get another shot at you and the World Title. And this time, I'm gonna make sure there'll be no Todd Cortez or anyone else for that matter to screw it up. Next week... Prepare... For [i]Champions[/i]! The members of Cucaracha Internacional break off and leave looking pleased with themselves. SCHIAVONE The Match Of Champions, next week on HeldDOWN~! Let's go back to Michael Cole and The Coach!

Personally, I think it should be along the lines of; a certain match-up can only be chosen once in the draft and a certain wrestler can only appear once on a particular person's card/roster. Otherwise, somebody could just snap up a battle royal or Royal Rumble Match and hamstring everyone else.

Yeah, we've got like, 6-7 on the go across the board at the moment? Madness. What we need is a sweep for the Euros to give us a reason to support someone over the summer. Problem is finding 16 guys to participate. Anyway, the US/England game. Why Defoe up front with Rooney? I thought the point was for Rooney to play 'second-striker', but since when has Defoe been the kind of player for someone to play off of? He's another 'second-striker' type player. Not to mention Defoe being largely worthless so far at international level. Yet another friendly where we learn absolutely nothing new.

I'd be more than happy to volunteer, if the plan is comparing supercards at the end of it all.

Maybe early for questions, but what's the criteria exactly? Is a wrestler only allowed once per roster/card or once in total?