King Cucaracha

AMEN! Seriously, enough. No Remorse Corps, good use of the three guys. Resiliance, shitty name, seem like they were chosen totally at random, bearable. Vulture Squad, dumb name, makes sense with the storyline. What doesn't make sense is to throw these three (EDIT: that being Whitmer, Albright and Pearce of course) together and dilute things stable wise (with yet another HORRIBLE name), especially considering you've already got Sweeney's crew and Project 161, debuting on the same show no less. Three stables works. Four was bearable since Sweeney's is a little different in structure. Six is verging on WCW 1998 overkill.

I do agree. But the thing is, for a lot of his career, he was either restricted by his character in the beginning when he was really slow, deliberately, or paired up with whatever big guy they could find month in and month out (particularly his first face run), so he didn't have the chance to have great matches even if he could. Whenever he's been given a capable opponent, he's more often than not produced good to great matches. Hell, he's got a pretty damn impressive back catalogue of matches, considering some of the stiffs he's been stuck with over the years. Granted I'm a big Taker mark but I really don't think he gets the credit he deserves sometimes, for whatever reason (the sports entertainmenty gimmick, the opponents he's been lumbered with, OMG teh politks!) The only problem I have nowadays is the reliance on the same old "Nobody has ever dominated The Undertaker like -GENERIC BIG MAN OF THE MONTH- just did!" storyline and the same old routine of everybody having to be scared of The Undertaker, which ruins a lot of promising feuds, like with Orton or even Batista.

10 Man Tag! Leon Rodez, D*LUX and The Love Doctors vs. The Beverly Hills Blonds, Christian Wright and The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew

OAOAST 6-Man Tag Titles Love Generation (Leon + D*LUX) vs. Beverly Hills Blonds and CPA

My stuff's in.

Any chance I could get an extension on the main-event and a promo with Landon/PRL? With spots left in the show for me to just edit in tommorrow? I know after all my "let's not get anything in late anymore" speech it's a bit of a cheek but I got landed with work I wasn't expecting, work work rather than OAOAST work, so I've been caught short timewise.

COLE Two weeks ago, courtesy of Simon Singleton's roving camera, we were taken to Beverly Hills Vista Elementary School with The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew. Now, the Crew were there in search of Krista Isadora Duncan but they instead ran into D*LUX, who happened to be there as little Maya Isadora Duncan's show and tell project. And after more than a few choice words exchanged, the crutch of which being Lucius Soul claiming he'd like to 'pimp out' Chicks Over Dicks, we come to tonight where Tyler Bryant has challenged Soul to a one on one match, looking to avenge the honour of Krista. COACH Three problems off the bat. One, two grown men being a little schoolgirl's 'show and tell project'. Two, the reason they did it in the first place, cause they've got the hots for feminazi Krista. And three, the suggestion Krista has any honour to defend. Okay. Carry on. COLE Thank you. "Makes Me Wonder" by Maroon 5 begins to play right on cue, to a whoop of delight from the fans. Out from the back bound Shayne Brave and Tyler Bryant, high-fiving before stepping aside, making way for JADE RODEZ, firmly back in the D*LUX fold to everyone's joy!! COLE Alright! COACH Oh please, this jezebel. Jade points D*LUX to the ring, the boyband duo already half a step there ready to slap the hands of the Dayton natives. Even though it's just a singles match, D*LUX showing a great togetherness and comradery. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, being accompanied to the ring by JADE RODEZ and SHAYNE BRAVE... he hails from Auburn Hills, Michigan. Weighing one hundred and ninety six pounds... one third of the OAOAST World 6-Man Tag Team Champions... "TREMENDOUS" TTYYYYYYYLLLLLEEEEEERRRR... BBRRRRYYYYYYYAAAAAAANNNTT!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" "Give me something to believe in Cause I don’t believe in you anymore Anymore I wonder if it even makes a difference to try (Yeah) So this is goodbye" With Jade and Shayne applauding him from their adopted corner, Tyler enters the ring and fires the crowd behind him. For all the fist-pumps and shouts of 'COME ON!' though, all he really needs is to remove his purple denim jacket to whip (some) of the crowd into a frenzy! COLE Tyler, along with Shayne Brave of course, two young men who've really risen through the ranks of the OAOAST in the last year and a half, to become one of the best and most popular teams in the company. And a lot of credit for that rise could be attributed to Jade Rodez. Now they've learnt to cope without her, they're the stronger for it I'm sure. But now Jade is back by their side, it could be a matter of time before these two are challenging for the One And Only Tag Team Championships. COACH With their crush holding one of the belts? Pssh! Tyler hands his 6-Man Title belt to the referee and begins his warm-ups, as all eyes turn to the entrance way. A drumroll begins to roll through the air, building into THE BEST SONG EVER, "Jive Soul Bro"!! Looking confused to hear this at an OAOAST show, Tyler tries to contain laughter as "Sweet" Lucius Soul comes strutting out through the entrance doors, combing away at his 'fro with a confident grin on his face and Rico De Janeiro backing him up. As Lucius stops to comb out the 'fro properly, Rico pats his partner on the back and points him out as the "Heart And Soul Of The OAOAST". BUFFER And, introducing at this time the opponent! He hails from New Orleans, Louisana... weighing in tonight at one hundred, eighty eight pounds... he is accompanied to the ring by RICO DE JANEIRO, one half of THE MARDI GRAS HOMEWRECKING CREW... here is "SWEET" LLUUUUUUCCCCIIIIUUUUUSSSSSS... SSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUULLLLLLLLLLL!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" "You're a jive soul bro A jive soul bro an' you're always lyin' to your friends You're a jive soul bro A jive soul bro an' you'll never get nothin' in the end" COACH Ya know, D*LUX might not have to worry about the tag titles being forbidden fruit too much longer. Come Zero Hour, these two men, you could be looking at the new One And Only Tag Team Champs! COLE Well, The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew do have their shot at Chicks Over Dicks, September 30th at Zero Hour. And you never know. It'd be considered a major upset but Rico and Lucius, another team who've climbed the ranks in a short space of time. Climbing to the apron, Lucius demands Tyler is held back before he'll even contemplate entering the ring. Of course, the honourable Tyler isn't anywhere near him. But Lucius insists on it nonetheless, before he saunters in and combs out the 'fro some more for the disapproving Ohio crowd. COLE He sure loves that hairdo, doesn't he? COACH You would though, wouldn't ya. If I had hair like that, I'd cherish it just like Lucius. That thing is a work of art! COLE To be fair, you'd cherish ANY hair, but let's not dwell on that too long. Lucius places his 'fro pick in his hair and allows himself to be checked out by referee Mike Chioda. Meanwhile, Tyler gets some last words of encouragement from Shayne and Jade before we're ready to go. *DINGDINGDING!* The bell sounds and Tyler skips into the centre of the ring, his eagerness to get underway causing Lucius to duck through the ropes and call for a timeout. Tyler looks frustrated but backs off, Lucius coming out of the ropes and pointing out he's not ready yet because he needs to comb his 'fro again. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" After a few teases of the comb, Lucius is finally ready to go and the two men circle. Collar and elbow tie-up, initated and won by Tyler who brings Lucius down into a side headlock. Lucius instantly backpedals into the ropes though, forcing a cheap break of the hold and scrambling out of the ring with steam coming out of his ears. When the referee starts to count him, Lucius and Rico who has come over to comfort his partner complain that Tyler was "all up in the 'fro, dawg". COLE Now, these could very well be mindgames on Lucius' part. Or, he could just be REALLY unnaturally obsessed with his hair. COACH Can't it be both? Rico provides a second opinion for Lucius on the outside, his partner clearly flustered over the state of his hair. Everything seems to be fine. But all the times it takes between them to agree wears thin on Tyler Bryant, who runs to the ropes and takes the fight to the floor with a TOPÉ!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE There we go! Tyler Bryant taking both Homewreckers out with that dive, enough stalling, it's time to fight here tonight! Slapping a few hands outstretched to congratulate him on his successful dive, Tyler collects his actual opponent and throws him back into the ring. Tyler then leaps to the apron and lures Lucius into a shoulder, driven in through the ropes to the gut. Over doubles Lucius, allowing Tyler come in up and over the top, rolling down Soul's back and making for the ropes. Recovering his senses, Lucius rushes to meet him with a Hiptoss... blocked! Tyler jabs Lucius in the gut and twists on the arm, wringing it out and whipping Lucius into a corner. Grabbing the top rope, up and over the invisible man goes Soul, not realising Tyler has come off the ropes in front of him until a Flying Clothesline is winging it's way towards him! Cover by Tyler... 1... 2... No. Tyler meets Lucius with a forearm shiver. And a second. Make it three! Calling on the support of the crowd, Tyler then whips Lucius off the ropes and ducks his head... too soon, allowing Soul to boot him in the shoulder blade! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Swagger back in his step, Soul struts around for a second or two before making a sudden dart into the ropes. Drop down by Tyler though, Lucius going up and over before being forced to duck a leapfrog. Off the ropes comes Lucius again, looking for a sattelite headscissors. Tyler throws him off though... missing with a clothesline... but getting the knockdown on a back elbow! COLE Fast paced action here from these two young athletes! Holding his jaw, Lucius retreats into a corner looking for a timeout. Tyler isn't about to let up though, reminding Lucius exactly why he's doing this as he climbs to the middle rope and lets out a cry of "KRISTA!"... "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FIVE!" "SIX!" "SEVEN!" "EIGHT!" "NINE!" ...Tyler messes up the 'fro, flustering Lucius up before punch number... "TEN!" COACH Now that's not neccessary at all! Jade and Shayne applaud their cohort's efforts as he jumps down from the ropes, whipping Soul out of the corner. Lucius hits the opposite turnbuckles hard and comes staggering out, Tyler coming off the ropes at the side and attempting a Bulldog. A hand in the back pushes him off though, Tyler managing to save himself from a bad collision in the far corner... *SMACK!* ...BUT ALMOST GETTING DECAPITED WITH A CORNER YAKUZA KICK AS HE TURNS AROUND!! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE Oh, my! That might be a knockout right there! Collapsing out of the corner, Tyler looks like he may well be KOed, to the concern of his manageress and tag team partner. Standing over him, the confident Lucius proves he's also resourceful, pulling out a second 'fro comb from his beige pants and tending to his hair. The boos of the crowd seem to spur him into making the pin though, not perhaps what Dayton had intended... 1... 2... NO! COACH Oh man, I would love it if Lucius did that to Krista at Zero Hour. You see how worried Shayne looks now with his partner down and hurting? Just imagine what he'd be like if his precious pin-up got her face smushed beyond recognition! Pulling Tyler out of the corner, Lucius simply puts the boots to his opponent a little, buying himself a little time to maybe catch his breath. Slapping the thighs, he then squats down and applies the time-tested Camel Clutch! Soul pulls back on the jaw, referee Chioda dropping in to check for a submission. JADE & SHAYNE TY - LER! TY - LER! "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" The Dayton crowd catch on quickly and rally behind "Tremendous" Tyler, just as Lucius starts to get real nasty and fishhooks the eyes and nose, trying to mess up the boyband features a little more! COLE It looks like Lucius is more interested in smushing Tyler Bryant's face right now Coach! COACH Good! "ONE!" "TWO!" "TH..." Lucius breaks quickly enough, reasserting the Camel Clutch while Rico tries to get the crowd to quieten down. It has the reverse effect though. And the increased noise of the crowd begins to get the blood pumping for Tyler! Fists clenched, a burst of energy allows Tyler to push up and start to escape the hold, much to Lucius' shock. Just as Tyler starts to escape though, Lucius releases the hold and lands a boot to the back of the head! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Following up, Lucius hits a snap suplex and floats over... 1... 2... Kickout! Shooing the referee out of the way, Lucius now looks to get this over and done with, heading to the middle rope. There he perches while Tyler climbs back to his feet, still looking a little dis-orientated from the kick in the corner earlier. Lucius lines him up and leaps from the top, looking for a double axehandle... ...DUCK, Tyler catching Lucius and going behind into a rear waistlock! Soul breaks it though, connecting on an elbow and executing a standing switch. O'Connor roll... 1... 2... Kickout! Off the ropes comes Lucius, being forced to leap up and over Tyler who's still on the mat. Lucius hits the far ropes and lunges at Tyler for a wild Lariat. Wild is the operative word however, missing high with the line and turning around as Tyler now runs the ropes, coming back with his own YAKUZA KICK!! *SMACK!* "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE There's a little reciept for ya! Bam! Jade and Shayne play intergender cheerleader duo again for the Dayton crowd as both men stay down after that thunderous kick. Rico tries to make his lone voice heard to encourage Lucius on but he's hopelessly drowned out by the rest of the pro-Tyler masses in the arena. The only man standing, Mike Choida, putting a standing ten on the two wrestlers. COLE This crowd trying to get behind Tyler Bryant here. There's very few men in the OAOAST with the following that D*LUX can boast. COACH That's why this country sucks! COLE ..... At the ref's count of seven, Lucius is first to his feet. Tyler is right behind him though and possessing the most of his senses as he strikes first with a stinging right hand! Lucius is rocked, but responds in kind. Back comes Tyler though, landing one, two, three right jabs before drawing on some more crowd energy. Off the ropes, Tyler throws another YAKUZA... ...DUCKED! It's Lucius coming off the ropes now at full pelt, looking for another headscissors... and getting countered, dropped across the knee with a Tilt A Whirl Backbreaker! COLE Around the world and nothing to show for it but a bad case of jetlag! Hooking the leg, Tyler folds Lucius up in a pin... 1... 2... Kickout! Applying a front facelock, Tyler drags Lucius into the centre of the ring and clubs him across the upper back. Turning back to back, the boyband sensation then shoots for chart success with the Recordbreaker... ...but Lucius floats over the back and lands on his feet! A quick shove in the back sends Tyler into the ropes, building momentum for a clothesline attempt. However Lucius ducks underneath and makes a sudden turn, coming off the ropes at the side of Tyler Bryant. With Soul out of his line of vision, Tyler doesn't know what's coming. And he doesn't know what's hit him either as he's sent airborne by THE POOOUUUUUUUUNNCCCCEEEEEEEE~!!!! Period. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH Let's see anyone in the NFL match that for distance! Tyler just FLEW! Inexplicably, Lucius smells the top rope before deciding to follow up with the cover... 1... 2... SHOULDER UP!! "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" Telling the crowd to shut their mouths, Lucius climbs back to his feet and sees Tyler beginning to get back up. A smile forms on Sweetness' face and he clasps his hands together, indicating it's 'bedtime'. COLE Uh-oh, time to 'Fro 2 Sleep' perhaps! Lucius helps Tyler the last little way up, smirking over to where Jade and Shayne watch on while he hoists Tyler up into the fireman's carry. But his arrogance costs him as Tyler is able to slide down the back and escape! Ducking low, a quick back suplex folds Lucius up! And as he rolls through onto one knee, he finds himself prone to get his head shone with the SHINING ENZIGURI!! *SMACK!* "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE But no! It's Lucius who's napping now! COACH No, come on Lucius! Rolling Lucius over, Tyler hooks the leg, Rico barely able to watch as Chioda counts the... 1... 2... NO! ONLY TWO! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE No! Referee Mike Chioda saying that shoulder came up JUST in time, Lucius Soul showing plenty of resiliancy to kick out after that vicious kick upside the head. Looking understandably disappointed at not getting the three, Tyler has to drag Lucius back up, looking again for the Recordbreaker. Dropping to his knees, Soul sandbags the attempted move though. He then goes one better than just blocking, tripping out Tyler's feet from underneath him and causing him to fall forward, throat first across the middle ring rope! Away staggers Lucius, bringing referee Chioda with him... ...ALLOWING RICO TO CATCH TYLER WITH A CHEAPSHOT FROM THE OUTSIDE!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" COLE Hey! HEY! De Janeiro from the outside! COACH What, I didn't see anything? Clearly pleased with himself, Rico turns to the fans and strokes his 'stache. However, when he turns around, he's shocked to see Shayne Brave flying towards him, HITTING A CROSSBODY OFF THE APRON!! Shayne mounts the Brazilian and rains away with right hands, getting the crowd going on that side of the ring. The other three sides are more concerned with the action in the ring though, as Tyler staggers off the ropes and into a BICYCLE KICK from Lucius Soul! Dropping like a sack of potatoes, Bryant looks out. But Lucius wants to make sure and quickly brings Tyler back up, hoisting him into a fireman's carry and parading him around for a second... before throwing the boybander up and CRACKING him in the face with a knee on the way down!! COACH FRO 2 SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP-UH~! COLE That's going to do it. Lucius quickly hooks the leg, Chioda ignoring the protests of Jade Rodez long enough to make the count... 1... 2... 3!!!!! *DINGDINGDING!* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" COACH The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew pick up YET ANOTHER win over D*LUX!! Upon hearing the three count, Shayne Brave leaves Rico be and jumps into the ring. He's too late to catch Lucius though, as he's already sliding to the floor and smugly celebrating his win. Rico stumbles over holding his jaw and looking pretty angry, but not too angry to wrap an arm around his victorious partner and join in the victory party. BUFFER Here is your winner of the match... "SWEET" LLUUCCIIUUSS... SSSSOOOOOUUUUULLLLLLL!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Lucius points to his brain as he and Rico back away, looking on with amusement at Shayne shouting back at them and Jade Rodez knelt down, tending to the semi-conscious Tyler. COLE Fair means or foul, clearly the latter here tonight, it's a win for Lucius Soul and another win for Mardi Gras over D*LUX, who seem to certainly have their number. COACH No doubt about it. And now, they've also got the confidence to go on to Zero Hour and bring home those titles. The uncrowned Tag Team Champions, Lucius Soul and Rico De Janeiro! As the gloating Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew disappear through the entrance doors, still celebrating 'their' big win, D*LUX are left in the ring. A clearly groggy Tyler sits back up and is held there by Shayne who makes sure his partner doesn't move anywhere too soon. A consolation is given to them in the form of the 6-Man Tag Team Title belts, handed over by Jade Rodez who then leads the crowd in some consolidatory applause for D*LUX. COLE A great reception from the Dayton crowd for D*LUX, even in defeat. And it's great to see Jade Rodez back by their side. COACH Yeah, good job kids. You came out to defend Krista's honour and you got beat, for real. Congratulations. COLE Way to put a downer on a great moment Coach. COACH Holla. COLE We'll have more HeldDOWN~! coming up, don't go anywhere fans.

Insider info on ROH? OMG SANDMAN IS PROJECT 161!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes! With Mantis on commentary. "Yes, I've heard a lot about this 'Sand Man' fellow."

Wait, wait. SANDMAN VS. BRYAN DANIELSON RING OF HONOR WHOOOOOOO!!!!!! There we go.

Agreed. The sad thing is how so many of us are either unsurprised or uninterested at the outcome. If this were 5-10 years ago (you know, when wrestling was good) and they'd have done this, it'd have been uproar. Sign of the times.

Well, that's the last time I use sarcasm on the internet. For a few days.

Main Event please (unless someone already has dibs) Two On One Handicap Match Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican -vs- Zack Malibu

Coz it's strong style! Headdrops and shoot strikes, that's the way forward man. This Danielson pirate has potential you know. There's just one thing missing. Do you guys reckon he could grow a beard?

A couple of people in the ECW thread or somewhere else jumped to the Burke conclusion (the 4-UP wristtape) and made me wish it was him, even though there's really no chance. If it's who I'm expecting, Coach, it should be an 'interesting' night.

KING BOOKAH VS. BRYAN DANIELSON RING OF HONOR WHOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Tyler Bryant vs. Lucius Soul Plus, something unconfirmed but big.

COLE Well, a little earlier we heard a couple of big announcements regarding Zero Hour. Heartland Invitational Chamber of Hell, Felix Strutter put into one of the most dangerous environments the OAOAST has ever seen. Our big main-event, a three-way Ladder AngleSlam Re-Match between Landon Maddix, Tha Puerto Rican and Zack Malibu. And in addition to that we've got another big rematch, just signed for Zero Hour. The OAOAST 6-Man Tag Team Titles will be on the line, Leon Rodez and D*LUX defending the belts against The Beverly Hills Blonds and Christopher Patrick Allen. COACH About time! COLE Well, Leon and D*LUX were happy to give the rematch... COACH So they damn well should have been! They stole those titles. Under masks! It was daylight robbery of Fort Enterprise that has so far gone unpunished. COLE And now, Jade Rodez is back by the side of D*LUX and re-united with her brother. The Enterprise will be hoping to restore some face, Sunday night September 30th at Zero Hour. And as far as announcements go, how about this. Just signed for next week, Tyler Bryant has made a challenge to The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew after what we saw last week courtesy of Simon Singleton Productions. And it's been accepted, by "Sweet" Lucius Soul, Tyler versus Lucius one on one, next week in Dayton! COACH Even with Jade back, those poor deluded kids are trying to play knights in boyband armour for Krista. It's bitch form is what it is.

BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome... your OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION... "BOOOOOOOOOOOOO..." BUFFER ... LANDON! "LA CUCARACHAAAAAAAAAA"... MMMMMMMAAAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" [b]"PREPARE...FOR...LANDON!"[/b] [i]...WAAAAAHHHHH... *DUM DUM*[/i] In a change of pace from what you'd usually expect, "Megalomaniac" by Incubus hits, as from behind the curtain steps Megan Skye, heralding the arrival of her man, the World Champion, Landon Maddix! Smug grin on his face, Landon stops at the top of the ramp and raises the World Title in one hand, to widespread boos. COLE Landon Maddix, who escaped with that World Title by the very skin of his teeth at AngleSlam 2007. We knew he'd need a little slice of luck to fall his way to survive the challenge of Zack Malibu and Tha Puerto Rican intact. Little did we know just HOW much luck. Landon and Megan make their way to the ring, continuing to look mighty pleased with themselves. Taking centre stage, Landon picks up the microphone left behind by Buffer and taps it a couple of times to check it's on and to hopefully shut the people up. At least one of those works. MADDIX The Champ is Here, The Champ is Here, The Champ is HERE! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MADDIX Oh boo, hiss. What is this, pantomime season? Come on people, give it up for your World Heavyweight Champion! The REAL World Heavyweight Champion, the real main-event! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MADDIX That's right. I'm no reject, I'm a winner. And I realise why you're all so unhappy to see me right now. It's because you were wrong. You were all wrong! (points to the left) You were wrong. (points to the right) You were wrong. (points to the left again) You were wrong. (points to the camera) YOU were wrong. Everybody who expected me to lose this OAOAST World Heavyweight Title at AngleSlam? Wrong! The AngleSlam Curse continued. The PRL Can't Get The Job Done Curse continued. And the reign of La Cucaracha, it continues on unabated! Megan applauds her man. Like he needs the ego boost. MADDIX See, the odds were staked against me at AngleSlam. Plenty of times, this title could have been ripped from my waist without me even getting pinned for it and let's face it, that was the only way this belt was possibly leaving my possession. The deck was stacked. The mountain, steep. But if you thought I was going to buckle under the pressure then you clearly aren't familiar with just who I am. That which does not kill me can only make me stronger. Harder, Better, Faster, Landon. COLE That sounded kinda familiar. COACH Shhhh! MADDIX Just like you were all wrong about Todd Cortez, you underestimated me again and now, you're all chowing down on that humble pie. I just hope you've all learnt your lesson finally. I. Am. Your. World. Champion. I am the BEST! I'm no longer some outsider from the SWF, I am your standard bearer. And there's nobody that can mat... The lights go down in the arena. A Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them: [b]*THE CHAMP IS HERE!*[/b] With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and "Know Your Role '99" begins playing, with the crowd standing up and booing. PR is heard saying, "THE CHAMP IS HERE!" throughout the song, while smoke fills the entryway and strobe lights appear on the entrance set. A few seconds elapsed, and out from the curtains and through the smoke steps "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican. COLE What is this now? Landon watches on with hands on hips as PRL strides to the ring, already running his mouth at a mile a minute rate. In he slides, Landon hanging back against the ropes as Tha Puerto Rican angrily demands a microphone. MADDIX I have no idea why you're out here. What is it with people interru... PRL Landon Maddix, know your role... "AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH!!" PRL glares at the fans. PRL Maddix, you are without a shadow of a doubt the LUCKIEST man on the face of God's green earth! You have the nerve to come out here and run your mouth about how you beat Tha Puerto Rican? How you overcame tremendous odds? Landon Maddix, you got lucky, that's all! You were lucky that refereeing our match was none other than 79 year-old, arthritic, blind as a bitch-slapped bat Earl Hebner who managed to MISS the fact that I had the Corporate foot on the ropes when you, quote-un-quote, 'pinned me' at AngleSlam! And right now, I am DEMANDING a rematch! Laughing at the suggestion, Landon holds his hand up. MADDIX PR, seriously buddy... nobody's buying that. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MADDIX I mean, come on, that's the oldest excuse in the book. You're just blowing smoke. PRL Monkeys in the truck, roll the footage! MADDIX Footage? What foota... [QUOTE]Maddix quickly knocks down Malibu and lifts PRL up, into the fireman's carry, turning him away from the ropes before delivering the GO 2 SLEE... *SMACK!* ...SCHOOL'S OUT!! COLE SCHOOL'S OUT! HE GOT HIM, RIGHT ON THE BUTT... ONE! COLE WAIT! TWO! COLE WAIT NO, ZACK! THREEEEEE!!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE NO! Zack, having realised what was happening a second too late in his exhaustion, dogpiles on top of the fall just as the three comes down. COLE Zack broke it up! Didn't he? COACH No! That was three, look at the referee. ---------------------------------------------- *SECOND CAMERA ANGLE* *SMACK!* ...SCHOOL'S OUT!! ONE! TWO! [I]...foot goes on the ropes...[/I] THREEEEEE!!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Zack, having realised what was happening a second too late in his exhaustion, dogpiles on top of the fall just as the three comes down.[/QUOTE] Back to live action and Landon stammers for a reply, the crowd louder now. MADDIX Now... now, hang on, that proves nothing. PRL That proves you didn't beat me. MADDIX Look, I know they say the camera never lies but, we all know that isn't neecessarily true. That was just a poor camera angle. That could have been doctored footage for all we know! PRL Landon, face it, you didn't deserve to beat me. You didn't really pin Tha Puerto Rican. And that means, you owe me a rematch, fair and square, one on one, to see who the better man reall... .:CUE: "Getting Away With Murder", Papa Roach:. "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COACH Oh, what now!? The Pittsburghers erupt as ZACK MALIBU walks out onto the stage, microphone in hand and a wry smile on his face. Arms folded, Zack looks at the two bickering superstars in the ring and shakes his head. MALIBU Forgetting someone? MADDIX This is getting ridicu... MALIBU Ridiculous!? No Landon, YOU'RE ridiculous! The fact you came out with the win at AngleSlam is ridiculous. The fact you're still holding the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship is ridiculous. This little weekly playground squabble you two keep having is ridiculous. Let's cut the bullshit and get down to facts, huh? Usually, I'm not one for cursing. But that's exactly what these fans are thinking. That's what they were chanting as you walked out of the Garden with that belt. They know, what went down was bull. They know you didn't deserve to retain that belt. PR, thanks for the little visual reminder you just gave us all. Makes my explanation pretty simple. I kicked Landon. Landon fell on top of you. Maddix, School's Out was lights out! How long did it even take you to realise you'd actually won the match? 5, 10 minutes? 15 even? You were OUT! Out COLD! I had you beat and if it wasn't for pure LUCK, I would be the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion right now!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" PRL makes a motion for Zack that he's all mouth, which is kinda ironic. MALIBU I'm not one to bitch, moan and gripe when things don't go my way. Unlike some. But if PRL's out here demanding a rematch, he needs to get in line because by all rights, I'm the man who deserves the rematch. See, I was screwed by Money In The Bank. I got screwed at AngleSlam. And it's getting tiresome now. MADDIX Listen... first of all, I beat PRL with a Samoan Drop, okay? That fancy little kung-fu you threw at me? Barely grazed me. Second of all, you've used up your title shots boys. You... PRL My foot was on the rope! MADDIX You used that fancy little title shot contract already. And seeing as it was signed by some washed up actor from CHiPS, I'm surprised is was worth the paper it was printed in the first place. And as for you Malibu, I've just got one thing to say to you. This be... .:CUE: "Medal":. "YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COACH Uh-oh. COLE Busy night for the boss! The Pittsburgh crowd comes completely UNGLUED as their own ANGLESAULT comes through the entrance doors. Zack gives him a casual nod and hands him his microphone, waiting for the noise to die down. MADDIX What the hell is this? Do you people back there playing the music just play whatever CD gets handed to you, no questions asked!? ANGLESAULT Landon, save it. Now, there's been a lot of things said out here. Zack, you did hit School's Out to set up the pinfall. That's not really an issue though. In the heat of matches, things happen. PR, that footage has been viewed a number of times by myself, trust me. I realise that you did get your foot on the ropes. But this isn't the NFL, there is no instant replay. The referee's decision is final. And yes, you are still the World Champion Landon. MADDIX I know. ANGLESAULT But, the [i]Undisputed[/i] Champion? Perhaps not. See, there is a dispute here. Having reviewed the footage, PRL did have a foot on the ropes... and, technically, Zack was on top of the pinfall when the three count was made. Looking more and more confused by the second, Landon says something to Megan, who just shrugs. ANGLESAULT So, here's the thing. Does PRL deserve a rematch? Does Zack deserve a rematch? We're four weeks away from Zero Hour and it seems like we've got more questions than answers. Well, me and the other 'wisemen' have the answers. Yes, you will get a rematch. Both Zack and PRL smile for a second, then glare at each other. ANGLESAULT Both of you. "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!" Landon rolls his eyes, kicking thin air and ranting to Megan again. ANGLESAULT At Zero Hour, it will be Landon Maddix versus Tha Puerto Rican versus Zack Malibu for the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship once again. But, that doesn't neccessarily solve things. Let's see, we've got complaints about possible title changes without our champion being involved, fluke victories, bad refereeing decisions. So, just so we've not right back in the same position this time next month with more complaints, we're going to settle it a little more fairly. Even odds. No flukes. Three-way LADDER MATCH!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" MADDIX :O "Medal" hits again and AngleSault, his job done, shakes hands with Zack before leaving as quickly as he arrived. Zack smiles to himself as he follows after him, while PRL nods confidently over at Landon. The World Champion still looks stunned, clutching his title a little tighter all of a sudden. COLE Can you believe that!? A three-way Ladder Match!? COACH And that ain't dirtsheet talk, that's from the head honcho! It's going down at Zero Hour baby! COLE Twenty four days away, Zero Hour, what a main-event to look forward to! As PRL leaves, Landon is left to be consoled by Megan.

Bryan Danielson dressed as a pirate? Nooo...

It was time for the bi-monthly "I have NEVER in all my years seen ANYONE dominate The Undertaker like -GENERIC BIG GUY- did! Nobody in 5/10/15 years has EVER put The Undertaker out of commission, NEVER!" feud?

Are you fucking kidding me? Ric Flair is a shell of his former self (and no, it's not still better than the younger talents). Not to mention he makes me cringe every time he goes for a back body drop. Ric Flair should have been made a manager and assigned to a hotshot youngster with a superstar look. This way he can wrestle once in a long while, and utilize his REAL skills in a different avenue of the business (teaching the young guys how to work and talk). Uh... I'm pretty sure that DID happen. Batista. 2003. And yeah, I'm an idiot, I know Misawa isn't a chop guy. No no. Hydra vs. Ric Flair. ******.

Flair-Misawa would be appros. Two immobile middle age guys chopping each other ad nausem for 30 minutes?

It's Coach. How else could they screw this up? It's got to be Coach.

...wait for it...

Yeah but did the ref know that? I mean, obviously when they picked him up for it they gave him some sort of audible, what did they say? 'Take the finisher', 'Samoan Drop', know knows? If the ref didn't know ahead of time what he was taking, he wouldn't neccessarily know what was happening and how to take the move and was put in danger, whether it was a spike piledriver or what. He could have went with the part of the move JTG uses and landed on his head, took the drop at the wrong time, any number of things.