King Cucaracha

Seems like the natural option on paper. I've read interview with him in the past and he's mentioned how that'd be a dream to tag/work with Finlay. Goes either one of two ways- they let him be himself and tag him with Finlay or they assume having another Irishman will somehow detract from Finlay's gimmick so they'll stick him in something else. Looks like the latter. Drew was the guy MVP beat during his 'bring out jobbers and say they're champion of their country' phase, when he was feuding with... uh... ya know... right? I believe it was him, IIRC.

I know he's not 'technically' ROH talent, but they have got the ROH Champ in there. Plus if they're running a tournament to find a number one contender, the title shot will on a future tour (presumably). So it makes sense from a kayfabe standpoint that NOAH officials would book NOAH regulars in the tournament in the knowledge that whoever wins will be 100% certain to be there next possible opportunity.

Size shouldn't be a big issue. Only match I saw of his Heat run was against Goldust and he didn't look like he'd be out of place on the main roster size wise. The only thing that'd worry me is the character. Unless they let Cabana be Cabana, ie. entertaining european style worker, then it won't be the same. Judging from the mic-time they've given Punk in his ECW career, I'm not holding out much hope.

Former ROH World Champion Xavier.

Meltzer also said it'd be a ladder match. What's your point?

Main event is in GCF.

COLE Welcome back to Syndicated, where we are moments away from our big main-event. With AngleSlam just four weeks away, we will see the three participants in the triple threat, World Title main-event in action here. The sure to be awkward pairing of Landon Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican teaming up in an attempt to take out their third rival, Zack Malibu, plus a 'Dream Partner' of his choosing. COACH Do we have any idea who it is yet? COLE Not yet. I assume we'll know just as soon as PRL and Landon do. COACH That hardly seems fair. I mean, unless Zack's having trouble finding a partner which is entirely possible, why shouldn't he be made to name him in time for PR and Landon to prepare? COLE It's a little thing called 'intrigue' Coach. Sells tickets. COACH We come here like what, once a millenium? We coulda sold this place out with Biff Atlas in the main-event. Thankfully, it's at this point that the lights go down in the arena. The crowd know what's coming and already begin to whistle and cat-call, as Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them: [b]*THE CHAMP IS HERE!*[/b] With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and "Know Your Role '99" begins playing, with the crowd standing up and booing. The entrance doors slide open and out come "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican, his girlfriend and Women's Champion Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and his manager and "Career Consultant" Stephen Joseph Popick! The crowd boos away as PRL holds his black briefcase spray-painted with L.C. in yellow high, which of course contains his Golden Contract inside. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, this is your Dream Partner tag team main-event, scheduled for one fall!! Introducing team number one. First, accompanied to the ring this evening by STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK and the OAOAST Women's Champion, MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ! He hails from San Juan, Puerto Rico. Weighing two hundred, twenty pounds... he is, THE PUUUEEEEEEERRRRRRTTOOOOOOOOO... RRRRIIIIIIIIIICCAAAAAAAAAANN!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" PRL looks at the crowd in disgust, jawing with one section as he climbs onto the ring apron. Popick holds the ropes open for his man and Tha Puerto Rican enters, spinning around and soaking in the fans' boos. PRL busts out the classic 'HBK muscle pose' as pyro goes off behind him, Popick displaying PR with pride like a prize on The Price Is Right. COLE PRL, getting as warm of a reception here in London, England as he does everywhere else in the world. COACH Except Puerto Rico of course. COLE Well, maybe. As PRL does his rounds of the turnbuckles, smelling the electricity on each side of the arena... "REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH!" ...he gets rudely interrupted! The lights dim, alternating between complete blackout and really frikkin' bright as "Personal Jesus" by Marilyn Manson hits. From behind the curtain steps Megan Skye, heralding the arrival of The World Champion, Landon Maddix, who stops at the top of the ramp and thrusts his hands out to his side to resounding boos. The lights stop alternating but stay dimmed as he walks to the ring, head held high as you'd expect from the Champ. BUFFER And, his tag team partner! Accompanied to the ring by MEGAN SKYE! Hailing from Huron, South Dakota by way of Madrid, Spain... weighing in at two hundred and eight pounds... he is the reigning OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion... LLLAAAAAANNDDOOOOONN... "LA CUCARACHA"... MMMMMAAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" With his 'partner' watching on with a displeased look on his face, Maddix makes sure all eyes are on him as he unstraps his World Title and places it over his right shoulder. Jogging up the ring steps, Landon then makes his entrance in similar fashion to PRL, spinning into centre stage as Megan holds the ropes for him. That alone creates some tension between Champion and soon-to-be-challenger, forcing Megan, Lindsay and Popick to step in and mediate. COLE No love lost between Landon and PRL. But they have a common goal tonight, to defeat and soften up Zack Malibu ahead of AngleSlam. Popick continues to ram that point home as Landon and PRL continue to glare daggers at each other. It's not until "Getting Away With Murder" hits and the crowd erupt on every side around them that they finally break their staredown and turn to the entrance way. BUFFER And the opponents! First, hailing from Providence, Rhode Island... weighing in at two hundred and ten pounds, he is the former three-time World Heavyweight Champion... "THE FRANCHISE"... ZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCKK... MMMMMMAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIBBUUUUUUUUUU!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Malibu enters the arena on his own, welcomed by the cheers of the crowd. As he heads down to the ring, Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican keep their eyes on the aisleway, waiting for Malibu's partner to appear and follow him to the ring. Surprisingly, no one follows, and Malibu hits the ringside area solo, circling around the ring while his foes dare him to step through the ropes. COACH You think he's got a partner, Cole? COLE It wouldn't surprise me to see Malibu try to take his two rivals on solo, but I have a feeling there's more than meets the eye here. Zack takes the mic from Michael Buffer, and then steps through the ropes, walking up to both his opponents and looking them in their eyes before stepping back and speaking. MALIBU I know what's on your mind, guys. I know that you and everyone else in here, wants to know who my partner is going to be tonight. You wanna know who has my back tonight? All in due time. COLE All in due time? Did he PICK a partner at all? Maddix shouts "We're waiting!" to Malibu, daring him to end the theatrics, but Zack continues on. MALIBU Give me a minute here, Landon. It'll be worth the wait, trust me. You see, as soon as this match got announced, I knew what I had to do. I knew exactly who to pick for this match, because it was the right thing to do. No, it's not any of The Hooligans, and it's not any of the Originals, so you can throw your obvious choices right out the window right now. Because there is someone deserving of a chance to prove himself in this company. A man who's been too wrapped up in issues that were no fault of his own. An endentured servant needing to be set free.. Suddenly, Maddix shoves PRL down, shouting at him, to the shock of everyone. PRL gets up, but Zack of all people steps between them, keeping them away from each other. MALIBU Hey...HEY! What's with the tension, guys? C'mon Maddix, you're jumping the gun...I didn't get one of the Lightning Crew lackeys to start a revolution... Maddix, now infuriated that Zack has made him look like a fool (and strike his partner), screams for Malibu to cut to the chase. MALIBU ...you really wanna know? Maddix and PRL, in unison, shout "YES!", before glaring at each other for having the same thoughts. MALIBU Then let me tell you who it is. It's someone that can be a breakout star in this company. Someone with all the talent needed to succeed, but with one fatal flaw. Loyalty. How is that a flaw? Because this guy has spent his career remaining loyal to the wrong people. People who use his talent for their own gain. People who keep him on their side simply because they know they can't afford to have him as an opponent. People, like a certain World Champion, who deep down knew all along that this day was coming. Malibu peers into the eyes of Landon Maddix, and Landon gulps, appearing to know what's coming. MALIBU Ladies and gentlemen, my partner tonight...the URBAN LEGEND, TODD CORTEZ! COLE WHAT!? Maddix, quickly, takes the mic out of Zack's hands before Todd's music can be hit, and starts screaming. MADDIX Wait a minute...WAIT A GOD DAMN MINUTE! Hehe. No way, there is NO WAY Todd is going to be your partner! No...Todd Cortez is MY friend, Malibu. He's MY partner. We came up through the SWF together, we came here and made your life a living HELL...what makes you think Todd Cortez owes YOU anything!? The crowd pops loudly as Cortez sprints down the aisle, sliding into the ring. CORTEZ Landon, BACK OFF. Again, the crowd pops, as Todd puts Landon in his place, and takes the mic from him. CORTEZ Malibu...you've got some balls on you, man. After all we've been through, all that went down last year between The Wildcards and you, and now you're gonna use ME as a part of your games? Zack, who has been given another mic by Michael Buffer in the midst of all this, responds. MALIBU Then look me in the eye and tell me you're happy about where you're at. Can you honestly say you're happy being stuck as the background to a guy that you don't even LIKE? I'm no fool, Todd. I know about everything that went down in the SWF. I know that you spent your time there honoring your old tag partner because you felt that his early retirement was partly your fault. How you wound up back by the side of this clown I'll never know, but your loyalty is doing you more harm than good, and you're blind to it. You think HE'S good for your career? You want to make something of yourself, and that's all you ever wanted. You want to make your family proud, you want to honor your brother, but THIS is not how to do it. Landon screams from behind Todd, telling Malibu to stop "making up lies", but Todd turns around and backs Landon up himself. CORTEZ So what, you're telling me I shouldn't be obligated to anyone, yet you're asking for my help? MALIBU I'm asking you to open your eyes. You don't owe me a damn thing, and honestly, we'll never be best friends...but neither will you two. You're gonna get run into the ground as his workhorse, doing all the dirty work so Maddix keeps the blood off his hands. Is THAT what you want? Don't you deserve better than that? Wasn't that always the plan, Todd? To make yourself better than the hand you were dealt? Cortez grows silent, thinking over Malibu's words, when Maddix steals the mic from him. MADDIX You... don't even TELL me you're listening to this crap! After all we've been through, you're going to listen to HIM? HIM!??! Cortez speaks down into the mic, and says all of two words. "He's right." The crowd goes nuts. Maddix fumes. MADDIX What did you just say? Cortez steals the mic from Landon, and inches closer to his "friend". CORTEZ I SAID he's RIGHT. For almost three years now, I've been living everyone else's life. I did everything for everyone else, because I'm not selfish. I don't ask for much, but the one thing I ask for is RESPECT, Landon. RESPECT is something that I got from Mike Van Siclen. RESPECT is something that I got from Alan Clark... and whether you like it or not, I just got more respect from a man I was forced to torture just one year ago, than I EVER got from you. Maddix looks like he's about to shit, while Malibu and PRL keep at bay. MADDIX Do you know what you're saying to me? You do this now, there's no going back. Not tomorrow, not a week from now, not EVER. CORTEZ That's the idea. Maddix's lip quivers as he tries to find the words to direct at his now former running buddy, while Cortez addresses Malibu. CORTEZ Let's clear the air though, Malibu. I do this, but after tonight, I don't owe you a damn thing. I respect you, but I don't owe you. Malibu nods in agreement and puts his hand out, and after a moment of hesitation, Todd Cortez accepts it to a HUGE pop... ...and then turns around JUST as Landon Maddix was going to clock him with the microphone! Landon freezes, dropping the microphone before he begins to plead his case. Cortez isn't having it, however, because if a handshake with Zack Malibu wasn't enough, flooring his former Martial Law partner with a right hand certainly gets the point across! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COACH What the hell is going on here!? Tha Puerto Rican tries to intervene, but Malibu cuts him off, staggering him with a flurry of right hands and then sends him over the ropes with a clothesline, while Landon quickly rolls out of the ring, away from Cortez! Megan rushes over to her man, looking as shocked as he does. COLE A shocking turn of events here tonight... Zack Malibu's dream partner is Landon Maddix's worst nightmare! Todd Cortez has broken free of the chains that bound him, and when we come back, Zack Malibu and Todd Cortez will take on Tha Puerto Rican and the World Heavyweight Champion! [b]*COMMERCIAL BREAK!*[/b] COLE Welcome back to Syndicated, and if you're just joining us, you've missed out on a truly shocking turn of events. Todd Cortez was selected by Zack Malibu to be his partner against Landon Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican here tonight and accepted the role, breaking ties with the World Champion and becoming his own man! The in-ring action began during the break, as right now Malibu is trapped in the corner by Tha Puerto Rican, who cracks him in the chest with a pair of forearms before pulling him out. Malibu is sent to the far corner, but when PRL charges in, Zack tucks and rolls, avoiding the oncoming charge! Tha Puerto Rican turns around only to be hiptossed to the canvas by Malibu, and the fans rejoice at their hero taking charge. An Irish whip sends PRL to the ropes and back bodydropped on the rebound... but as Malibu comes up to a vertical base, he's nailed with a hard running kick from Maddix, who blind tagged himself in! COACH That's teamwork, baby! COLE You know, you're right, Coach. Tha Puerto Rican and Landon Maddix have the common goal of wanting to eliminate Zack Malibu before Angleslam, and with that motivation they can be a formidable team. Malibu picked Todd Cortez as his partner tonight, a man he held in contempt since early last year, and while Cortez has apparently seen the light so to speak, one has to wonder if he and Zack can work together, or if this could all be some grand ploy thought up by Maddix and/or Tha Puerto Rican! Maddix puts the boots to Zack, then stands over him and slaps him in the face, telling him in no uncertain terms to "respect your World Champion!" Maddix then goes over the corner and start pointing and shouting at Cortez, but when the Urban Legend makes a move to step into the ring, Maddix quickly backs off, not wanting to lock horns with his now former charge. COACH I tell ya, if it is a ploy, Cortez sure is doing a job of making it seem like he wants to tear Landon apart. Landon turns around and drills Zack with a right as he's getting up, then nails him with a European uppercut...but Zack fights back, nailing Maddix with a flurry of chops that blister his chest...until Landon jabs a thumb in his eye! Maddix smiles to the audience, who respond to the move with their normal dislike for the reigning OAOAST World Champion, then brings Zack to the corner, where he rams his head into the top turnbuckle...or not, as Malibu puts a foot up to block the move, then sends the World Champion's face directly into a turnbuckle! Maddix tries to move away, but Zack takes him by the head and rams his head into the turnbuckle a few more times, in rapid succession, before dropping him with a scoop slam. Zack then comes off the ropes and nails Landon with a kneedrop across his forehead, and that leads to the first pinfall of the match. ONE! T-NO! Maddix is as resilient as he is brash, and gets a shoulder up almost as soon as the count begins. He's led up to his feet by Zack, who tries for a back suplex...but Landon floats over and spins Malibu around before shoving him! Zack gives Landon a look that expresses feelings of "are you KIDDING me?" and shoves back, causing the champion to fume. Landon and Zack go nose to nose now, their faces red with anger as they lock up, vying for position. Both men get their taste of an advantage, until Malibu snares Landon by the head and brings him over to the canvas! Zack holds on, but Landon uses a headscissors to pull him off, and both men get back to their feet. Zack goes for an open hand slap, gets blocked, and gets the second attempt blocked as well. Maddix then drives a boot into his gut, hammers him with a forearm across the back of the neck, and takes Zack over with a suplex that rocks the ring! Landon gets up and hits the ropes, following thru with a kick to the side of Zack's face as he gets up! COLE They'd be proud of that one, right here in the home of soccer. COACH Apparantly, they call it 'football' over here. What a backwards country, eh? Zack winds up hanging over the middle rope, and Landon sits on his back, pulling up on the rope in an attempt to strangle Malibu! At the referee's demand, Landon backs off (after taking advantage of the five count, natch), then leans over the top rope and rakes at Zack's face, tearing the skin back before being forced to break by Nick Patrick once again. Landon pleads his case, but it's just an opening for PRL to get involved, as he runs across the apron and jumps to the floor, bringing Zack's throat down across the middle rope! COLE There's what we talked about earlier! Tha Puerto Rican and Landon Maddix want to take Zack Malibu out of the equation and they are working hard at it tonight, breaking whatever rules they see fit in the process of course! Once PRL does his part, Landon rolls Zack onto his back and covers, barking at Patrick to start counting. ONE! TW-KICKOUT! COACH Looks like they're gonna be doin' a lot more of it, Mikey Cole. Maddix brings Zack up, trapping him in a front facelock to keep him at bay while Landon makes the tag. PRL comes in, and with Zack held in the facelock, kicks him in the stomach and then takes over for Landon, putting him in a headlock. PRL leads Zack to center ring, wrenching the hold, but when Malibu gathers himself, he lifts PRL up off his feet...but Tha Puerto Rican holds on, able to bring himself back to earth! Malibu tries a different approach, shoving PRL forward before he can totally regain his balance, and when PRL hits the ropes, Zack tries for a hiptoss on the rebound. He catches PRL, but the Lightning Crew leader won't go over, and instead counters with one of his own. This time it's Zack who won't be taken over, but PRL acts quick, hitting a knee to the gut, then drapes his leg over Zack's head, gaining some leverage as he backflips over to his feet...and just barely ducks a Malibu lariat! Both men run the ropes and try for dropkicks, and both come up short. As they get back to their feet PRL tries a chop, but Zack blocks with his elbows, then takes PRL's arm and wrenches, moving behind him in a hammerlock. PRL swings around, trying to use his free elbow to strike, but Zack ducks, hits an inverted atomic drop, and then runs the ropes to put some momentum behind a spinning wheel kick that nails Tha Puerto Rican across the tip of his chin! "YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" COLE Zack, so quick! COACH He's goin' for the tag Mikey! Sure enough, once he gains his bearings after the spinkick, Zack begins to scramble for his corner. But before he can make the tag Landon scoots in and blindsights him, dragging Malibu into the centre of the ring before he's forced to re-assume his position on the apron. COLE Landon seems to want no part of his former right-hand man. COACH Or, he just wants Zack to take all the punishment and maybe end up less than 100% for AngleSlam. COLE Or, both. PRL tags Landon back in, the World Champion again forced to cut off a tag on the other side. Landon stomps away on Zack, gradually moving towards the ribs once he's softened The Franchise up. Taking a moment to warn his tenuous partner to 'buck his ideas up', Landon then whips Zack into the ropes, looking for a clothesline. Zack swoops underneath though, coming off the ropes and hitting Landon with the spinning wheel kick! COLE Well, that ought to shut Landon's mouth. Literally and figuratively. With Maddix down, it's PRL's turn to come in and prevent the tag. He drags Zack away, drawing Cortez into the ring. The referee is distracted as now PRL works over Zack, firing off right hands as he waits for Landon to get back up. The makeshift partners find enough co-operation within them to whip Malibu off the ropes, ready for a double team. But a double clothesline misses the mark and Zack comes back, connecting with a foot a-piece on a double dropkick! "YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!" COLE Now BOTH men down! This must be Zack's chance to tag! *clap clap clapclapclap, clap clap clap clap* "COR - TEZ!" *clap clap clapclapclap, clap clap clap clap* "COR - TEZ!" COLE Listen to this. I never, ever thought I'd hear an OAOAST crowd cheering or chanting for Todd Cortez! COACH Me neither! The English crowd's football (*groan*... 'soccer') chant makes it clear what they want. Malibu is back up before his opponents, but in the wrong half of the ring. And with Landon and PRL quickly regaining their feet, Zack has to act quickly. Tucking and rolling, he avoids the lunges of both opponents, coming up to his feet in the corner AND MAKING THE TAG!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Here comes Cortez!! Landon's eyes bulge and quick as a flash, he dives for the outside. Cortez goes right for Tha Puerto Rican then, springboarding to the top rope and wiping out The Corporate Champion with a high-flying dropkick! Wheeling around, Cortez looks for Landon. He's routed to the floor though, so Cortez grabs PRL. A European Uppercut connects. And a second. One more, setting up and irish whip. Tha Puerto Rican goes underneath a clothesline and builds up some speed, throwing himself at Todd with a crossbody... CAUGHT! Cortez catches PRL in his arms and throws him with a Fallaway Slam! ONE! TWO! Save by Landon! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Immediately, Landon begins to regret his intervention as The Urban Legend stands straight up. Maddix tries to beg off from his now former ally, crossing his heart on his honesty over a handshake offer. But what he doesn't realise is deep down, even as allies, Cortez has been waiting for this moment on and off for the best part of a year. And he can't wait to grab Landon by his blond hair, backing him up into a corner and UNLOADING with a heavy combo of right hands!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Oh my! The World Champion's closest, possibly [i]only[/i] ally, an ally no more! COACH What an ingrate! What a dirty, rotten ingrate Cortez turned out to be! COLE What are you talking about!? With Megan only able to watch on in despair, Cortez continues to beat the hell out of his former partner. Irish whip follows, sending Landon corner to corner and HARD upside down in the turnbuckles! Teetering on the top, Landon manages to avoid tumbling to the floor and rolls back down the turnbuckles. However, he walks straight into a Crotch-Droppah from Cortez! Landon almost takes flight from the force of the landing and immediately rolls to the floor. Cortez is ready to follow, until a recovered PR attacks from behind. Shaky leg kicks from The Corporate Champion, beating Cortez down before he "smells the electricity"! COACH He's smelling it! He's smelling it! PR whips Cortez off the ropes. Leapfrog from Tha Puerto Rican. And a reverse leapfrog... RIGHT ONTO CORTEZ'S SHOULDERS!! PRL :O Cortez carries PRL around in the electric chair for a second or two before he gains his bearings, reaching down and jamming a finger into the eye of The Urban Legend. PRL then slides down the back and grabs the back of Cortez's head, running him to the ropes and vaulting to the outside, dropping him throat-first across the top rope with The Ricochet! However, the moment PRL turns to get back into the ring, Air Malibu takes off WIPING OUT THA PUERTO RICAN WITH A SUICIDE DIVE THAT SENDS BOTH INTO THE EDGE OF THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!!!! COACH YO~!!!! COLE It's broken down here, bodies all over the place! Slowly getting to his feet, Cortez looks out at the bodies strewn in front of the announce table. He then turns around, guided by the crowd... into a DROPSAULT by Landon! Quickly Maddix hooks the leg with all his might... ONE! TWO! NO! MADDIX COME ON REFEREE!! Maddix rushes to his feet... and hesitates. Almost unsure over whether to put the boots to Cortez, as he eventually does. With the crowd booing his every move, Landon soon gets into the swing of things and begins to smile away as he lands with the stomps. Landon then backs off, encouraging Cortez back to his feet. However, out of the corner of his eye, he sees Zack and PRL beginning to get back up. The two rivals scrap away on the floor. Providing the perfect target for Maddix, who propels himself through bottom and middle rope WITH THE TOPÉ ESPECIAL!!! COLE WOAH! Maddix, taking out Zack... [i]and PRL[/i]! And I've got my suspicions, that was no accident. COACH No shit, Sherlock. COLE I meant taking out PRL. The three components of AngleSlam's main-event lay on the floor and in a round about away, help/drag each other back up. Which leaves just Todd Cortez. No stranger to a risk or two, Cortez walks over to that side of the ring and shows great balance by climbing the ropes in the centre. Getting his footing on the top rope he then soars, WIPING EVERYONE OUT, INCLUDING STEPHEN JOSEPH POPICK, WITH A SHOOTING STAR SUICIDA!!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE OH, MY~! "COR - TEZ!" "COR - TEZ!" "COR - TEZ!" "COR - TEZ!" Understandably, all four men are slow getting up. It's Cortez up first though, throwing PRL into the ring and following close after. As PRL climbs back up he's measured by The Urban Legend, who waits for him to turn around before burying a boot into the gut. Lindsay Gonzalez reacts almost as quickly as the fans, who pop at the prospect of the Riot Act Plus... but as Lindsay jumps to the apron and distracts the ref, PRL goes low! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Ugh, typical PRL! A cheapshot, with his fiancee providing the distraction! COACH [i]The Women's Champion[/i], Lindsay Gonzalez. COLE What does that have to do with anything? With Cortez stunner by the shot below the belt, Tha Puerto Rican quickly pulls Todd in by the arm and puts the spine on the pine, dead centre of the ring! Lindsay drops back to the floor, as in spite of themselves, the fans rise to their feet. PRL removes his elbowpad, spitting on it and throwing it into the face of The Urban Legend. He does some weird hand signals, and then bounces off the ropes, jumps over Cortez, and then bounces off the opposite ropes. PR stops short of the elbow and just simply flips Todd off... and then drops the most electrifying move in professional wrestling, the INTENSEZONE ELBOW! "YEEEEAAHHHH - BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COACH The IntenseZone Elbow! The IntenseZone Elbow, the most electrifying move in spor... *SMACK!* "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE SCHOOL'S OUT!! SCHOOL'S OUT!! Zack catches PRL in a pre-mature celebration with the Superkick and slumps over top with the cover... ONE! TWO! TH- NO, LANDON SAVES!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Straight up to his feet, Landon catches Malibu on the way up with a kick. Lining him up, Landon then fires off a HARD roundhouse to the chest! Zack falls backwards, getting rolled right the way through as his feet fly up and being lifted up into a fireman's carry... NO! Zack escapes down the back and goes for the ANGLE SLA... NO! With a quick hop, Maddix lands behind! Both men stumble and as Zack meets the turnbuckles, he quickly pushes himself off, coming with SCHOOL'S OUT... *SMACK!* ...NAILING PRL FOR A SECOND TIME!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Aw, damn it! COLE PRL gets hit again... and I think Landon might have pulled him in the way! As Tha Puerto Rican collapses through the ropes and to the floor, Landon capitalises on the brief confusion, as he catches Zack and drives him face-first with the Complete Shot! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Zack rebounds off the canvas hard. With his opponent already beginning to roll, Landon kicks Zack the rest of the way out of the ring, putting the badmouth on him as he hits the ringside mats. Little does the World Champion realise what's behind him though. With a last insult thrown at The Franchise, Maddix turns around... into a boot! Standing headscissors, Cortez giving the signal.... *WHAM!* ...AND SPIKING MADDIX ON HIS HEAD WITH THE RIOT ACT PLUS~! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE Oh my God, he got him! COACH Oh no... The fans are on their feet, as Cortez flips Landon over, hooking the leg, Megan watching on with her hands on her head... ONE! TWO! THREEEEEE!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" *DINGDINGDING!* COLE OH. [b]MY![/b] BUFFER Your winners of the match... the team of "THE URBAN LEGEND" TODD CORTEZ and ZACK MMMAAAALLIIIIBBUUUUUUU!!!! The London crowd are going positively NUTS, as Cortez's hand is raised in victory. The not-so quick thinking production team, not being told ahead of time of Zack's partner, cue up "Getting Away With Murder". But it doesn't matter to Cortez what music is playing as he stands over Landon Maddix, victorious. COLE What a shocking turn of events... another shocking turn of events, in a situation rife with them! Todd Cortez has PINNED the World Heavyweight Champion! COACH Look at Megan, she can't believe this is happening. I can't either! As Landon's World Heavyweight Title is passed into the ring ready for him to wake-up, Cortez quickly snatches it from the referee. Leaning over the unconscious La Cucaracha, Cortez yells something at the fallen Champion before raising the title over his head, to a huge cheer! On the outside, Zack Malibu looks on, seemingly unsure of what to make of what's just happened. Next to him, Popick has the same look as he kneels beside Tha Puerto Rican. COLE Until about ten minutes ago, Cortez was still Landon Maddix's, for the want of a better word, 'lackey'. And now, he stands over him, holding [i]his[/i] World Heavyweight Championship!! What the hell does this mean for Landon Maddix, for all of these men in the run-up to AngleSlam 2007!? Cortez finally drapes the belt over the still KOed World Champion. Eyeing up Malibu, he then exits the ring and backs up the aisle as we... FADE OUT.

What is this referring to? I can't remember anything from the Hogan/Bundy build-up from what I've seen, but I haven't seen the entire segment just the vid package from Mania.

I'm not going to touch that one because... well, I wouldn't know where to start with how wrong you are. But you're missing the point. WWE is the face of wrestling. The general population hasn't heard of any other wrestling promotion besides WWE and I'd venture that about 70% still call it the 'WWF' anyway. People who aren't in 'the know' only know of the WWE. The majority of people who refer to Mixed Martial Arts don't call it 'MMA', they call it 'UFC'. And the majority of people who refer to wrestling would say 'WWE' (or 'WWF') rather than wrestling. That's the point. The other promotions are a small wheel in this, just like PRIDE or K-1 would be small wheels in any sort of MMA controversy, because they're a small wheel to the non-wrestling fans of Congress.

As we return to the airwaves, Sofa Central has a special guest. The CEO of The Enterprise himself, Theodore Moneymaker, takes his place on the sofa, not before being thoroughly brown-nosed by Coach of course who shakes the wealthy socialite's hand eagerly. COACH (sharply) C'mon Mikey, stand up! Show some respect COLE Settle down Coach. I would have thought you'd be used to Mister Moneymaker joining us out here by now. It seems like he's out here every other week nowadays and here you are acting like The Pope just sat next to you or something. MONEYMAKER The Pope? HA! Michael Cole, there's yet another example of a man who merely wishes he had the power and respect of yours truly. Sure, the Catholic community's support is unwavering, but prayers and spiritual elightenment will only obtain a fraction of what my wealth can! Let's face facts, there's been dozens of Popes and there'll be dozens more. However, there is and only ever shall be simply one Billion Dollar Heir! BWAHAHA! COLE Fantastic. So, may I ask why you're out here tonight? MONEYMAKER First of all little man, my business is just that. Second of all, it's Mister Moneymaker to you. I realise you actually remembered to give me that courtesy tonight, but I'm going to remind you just for the hell of it. Besides, I'm out here to watch my fellow Enterprise members. COLE Well, seeing as you're out here, there's plenty to talk about regarding The Enterprise that hopefully you can fill us in on. While Moneymaker has been making himself comfortable, the stage-hands have rolled out the red carpet ready for "Call Me" by Blondie to hit. The crowd greet the 80's kinda rock, kinda pop, I dunno, it's in some sort of genre song with the disdain it deserves. Nothing against Blondie. It's just Ned and Simon are asses. "Call me (call me) on the line Call me, call me any, anytime CALL ME! (call me)" With a distinct lack of Mackenzie DeCenzo at their side, The Beverly Hills Blonds are instead followed out by their third man, CPA. Simon carries his Siclopse over his shoulder as Ned hangs back a little, clearly taking with a couple of pretty females in the audience. Must be tourists. OH! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is scheduled for one fall and it is for the OAOAST World 6-Man Tag Team Championships!! On their way to the ring at this time, representing THE ENTERPRISE, are the reigning and defending Champions! At a total combined weight of seven hundred, twenty five pounds. CHRISTOPHER PATRICK ALLEN, otherwise known as C-P-A... and, SIMON SINGLETON, NED BLANCHARD, they are... THE BEVERLY HILLS... BBLLLLLLOOOOOONNDDSSSSSS!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE The Six Man Tag Team Champions, who will be defending their belts here, live from London, England. And I for one would say it's about time. COACH What's that supposed to mean? COLE Well... have these three even defended the belts on OAOAST television since winning them? Not that I recall. It seems like they've been ducking every challenge they've had, up until now, as the OAOAST committee have finally stepped in... MONEYMAKER Excuse me, but let me cut you off right there little man. My men are proud champions, who've been defending their titles whenever they deem fit within the mandatory 30 day period at live events and the such. And they certainly haven't 'ducked' any challenges... COLE What about Krista and D*LUX at The Great Angle Bash? MONEYMAKER That was a line-up change neccessitated by unforseen, outside factors. With the Siclopse set up in the aisleway, Singleton rolls into the ring and immediately rolls cameras to one side of the audience. And after capturing nothing but a sea of downward-pointing thumbs and upward-pointing middle fingers on his imaginary camera, he turns to where Ned gives his man a thumbs up from the corner as if for a souvenir photo. But of course IT'S NOT A REAL CAMERA, just a hand-signal. Yeesh. Meanwhile, the red carpet clears and "Makes Me Wonder" by Maroon 5 begins to play. A much more responsive London crowd rise to their feet, showing that boyband fever isn't entirely dead in Blighty! BUFFER And, introducing the challengers... Bounding out onto the stage, Tyler Bryant and Shayne Brave earn themselves bonus points with the fans for their Union Jack design denim jeans and jackets! Tyler looks out upon the fans, Shayne firing the people up before they both begin their walk to the ring. BUFFER First, total combined weight, three hundred eighty two pounds... "SHOWTIME" SHAYNE BRAVE... "TREMENDOUS" TYLER BRYANT... they are D*LLLLLLLUUUUUUUUXXXXXXXXX!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" "Give me something to believe in Cause I don’t believe in you anymore Anymore I wonder if it even makes a difference to try (Yeah) So this is goodbye" The boybanders break out a few of their funky fresh moves in between slapping the hands of the fans. They stop short of entering the ring just yet though. Partly for the numbers dis-advantage. Mainly because CPA is stood by the ropes on their side shooting them a death-glare, Ned and Simon pulling faces from behind their powerhouse of a partner's back. COLE D*LUX and The Beverly Hills Blonds have a long and storied history, made all the more heated since Jade Rodez joined up with The Enterprise. By the way, what is up with the match we're going to see later, Bra and Panties for the World Tag Team Championships!? MONEYMAKER Michael, you sound appalled at the prospect. Which is hardly surprising. But, the match is a test of faith for a certain Ms. DeCenzo. COLE But, it seemed like Jade was less than thri... MONEYMAKER Jade had her reservations, yes. After all, she is a refined young woman now, since I rescued her from the bulldyke claws of Chicks Over Dicks. However, she realises the opportunity put forward to her and I have assured her she'll come out of it with her head held high. Unlike those harlets you currently call 'Champions', who I'm sure will have their heads buried deeply within each other's cro... COLE Okay, I think we get that visual, thanks. "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" "LE - ON!" The crowd have taken up the chant in the delay, Blanchard's attempts to make them 'pipe down' having no effect. Only one thing could. :CUE: Trust Company, "Rock The Casbah":. The crowd cease the chants and on cue they erupt, as out storms LEON RODEZ!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" BUFFER And, from Grand Rapids Michigan... weighing in at two hundred, eighteen pounds... "SILKY SMOOTH"... LLLLEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOONN... RRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!! Hand-tagging his way down the aisle, Leon meets up with his tag team partners in the aisle and is faced with the same prospects they were. CPA, standing and waiting. That doesn't seem to deter Rodez though as he quickly skins off his robe and breaks for the ring, sliding through the unprepared CPA's legs and making a beeline right for Ned Blanchard!! Blanchard just about gets out of dodge, but Singleton's attempt at a cheapshot makes him the new object of Leon's anger. And as CPA tries to get across and help out, D*LUX pounce from behind, all hell breaking loose as referee Mike Chioda waves frantically for the bell! *DINGDINGDING!* With right hand after right hand, Leon backs Simon up into a corner and shows no signs of let-up. Behind him, D*LUX have CPA stunned and connect with a Double Dropkick. CPA stays on his feet though, so D*LUX quickly remove their jackets and hit the ropes. Double clothesline attempt from the bigman is ducked on both sides and Shayne and Tyler come off the opposite ropes, stereo flying forearms putting CPA down! MONEYMAKER Come on referee, get some control! Out rolls Allen, D*LUX following as a team. Meanwhile, Leon has scaled the middle turnbuckle and has The Video Voyeur trapped... "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FIVE!" "SIX!" "SE..." No! The chain stops at six, thanks to a Ned Blanchard double axehandle! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MONEYMAKER There we go Ned, there we go! Pulling Leon down off the ropes, Blanchard lands with a right hand of his own. And another. Leon is backed up against Simon now as Ned attempts an irish whip. Reversal by Rodez though, sending Ned corner to corner and hard into the turnbuckles on the far side. Simon sees this as his opportunity to pounce. But Leon is ready for him, as he elbows him in the face and sends Simon for the ride too. Horror-stricken at the sight of his partner careening towards him Ned throws his hands up and screams for his partner to "STOOOPP!", as if that would do any good, the fans erupting for a BHB pile-up in the corner! Simon and Ned clock heads and Singleton collapses backwards. Suddenly, every fan on one side of the ring is blowing and hand-waving, trying with all their might to make Ned fall too. They needn't worry, as sure enough the woozy Blanchard flair-flops out of the corner... COLE Mister Moneymaker, remember what you said about COD earlier? Well... "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" ...HEAD-FIRST INTO HIS PARTNER'S CROTCH!! SINGLETON :O Much to The Blonds embarrassment, Ned doesn't seem to be moving. His face buried deep in another man's crotch, the crowd laugh it up at Blanchard's expense as Singleton tries to unwrap his numbing legs from around his partner's head. MONEYMAKER NO, NO! This is hideous! Somebody get in there and seperate them, for the love of all that's holy, this is making a mockery of the entire concept of heterosexuality! Watching on with some amusement, Leon turns to the fans and shrugs his shoulders, as if to say he didn't know that would happen. Apparantly, he also didn't know he'd get clubbed from behind by CPA seconds later, sent spilling through the ropes and to the floor! Finally, on Theodore Moneymaker's protestations on the outside, CPA untangles The Beverly Hills Blonds from their 'predicament'. From behind comes Tyler Bryant now though, clubbing CPA from behind. Not with the strength CPA himself used on Leon moments earlier of course, but enough to get his attention. A succession of right hands back CPA in the corner. Tyler then looks to whip the bigman out. CPA is going nowhere though and boots Tyler in the gut, grabbing the head and ramming Tyler face-first into the turnbuckles! COLE Remember, this is all a preview of the big 5 on 5 grudge match at AngleSlam, The Enterprise facing Leon, D*LUX and of course Chicks Over Dicks! COACH I hope that last bit was a preview of the bra and panties match later. Mmm. MONEYMAKER *glares* COACH Uh... I mean, uh... death to lesbians! Yeah! [i]Except for the pretty ones. Holla.[/i] After choking Tyler in the corner up to a 4 count, CPA pulls his opponent into the centre of the ring. Scoop and a slam positions The Tremendous One, as Allen comes off the ropes with a big elbow... NOBODY HOME! Tyler dodging out of the way! CPA climbs back up nursing his right arm as Shayne Brave rolls back in, D*LUX combining with a double drop toehold. Hitting the mat hard face-first, Allen pushes right back up onto his knees... ...as D*LUX fire off basement dropkicks in stereo, sandwiching CPA's head in between! COLE New Kicks On The Block! Cover by Tyler, as legal a man as this match has so far... 1... 2... No! Together, D*LUX pull CPA back up and send him off into the ropes. The tag-team specialists then look for a Double Hiptoss... but CPA sets himself and not even Shayne and Tyler combined can take him over. They try again from standing, but CPA won't budge. So they go to the gut with knees and instead drop him with a Double Bulldog! MONEYMAKER Now this is just getting ridiculous. Two on one, still! The OAOAST committee and I will be having words about the signing of officials to Enterprise matches in the future, that's for sure! COLE To be fair, I don't see the Champions making an atte... HEY! Over at Sofa Central, a pale-white Ned Blanchard grabs a jug of water and proceeds to tip the entire contents over his face. Meanwhile, D*LUX are still full of peppy, boyband energy. Spotting Simon Singleton limping around ringside, Tyler and Shayne quickly converse and set themselves up. Off the ropes comes "Showtime" Shayne, Tyler ducking his head and backdropping his opponent over the top, RIGHT ONTO THE VIDEO VOYEUR!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" And on the other side, Tyler lines up Ned Blanchard CONNECTING WITH A PESCADO!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE D*LUX, taking to the air! Back in the ring, Rodez measures CPA, encouraging him to get back to his feet. Slowly Allen does, looking around for one of what were his last opponents before he got dropped on his face, D*LUX. Instead it's Leon thatn darts past him, coming off the ropes for a crossbody... ...CAUGHT! CPA carries Rodez like a small child into the centre of the ring, before twisting him around with a big Powerslam. Unlike a small child. That's just wrong. COLE What a Powerslam from the 280 pounder! That could do it right there. 1... 2... Shoulder up. With D*LUX and The Beverly Hills Blonds now battling on the outside, CPA backs into a corner and sets himself on the second rope. COLE This is something we don't usually see, the bigman leaving his feet. CPA steadies himself on the ropes... but takes too much time, allowing Rodez to run in and take him right off the buckle with an Armdrag!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!" COLE And maybe we shouldn't see it again in the future if that's anything to go by! Leaving the ring, it's Leon's turn to head up the ropes now. He goes all the way up to the top however, waiting for CPA to turn around before soaring and wiping out The Director Of Security with crossbody block Ricky Steamboat himself would be proud of... 1... 2... NO! Pushed off the cover and to his feet, Rodez immediately runs the ropes. Staying low, CPA forces Rodez up and over and winds up with a big haymaker to greet him on his return from the opposite side. However, Leon is able to slide through the legs and quickly connect with a Dropkick before CPA can figure out what happened! Out of the ring goes Allen, leaving Rodez to prepare for a dive of his own! But before he can follow through on his promise of highspots to the London crowd, Ned Blanchard pounces from behind! COLE Blanchard, taking care of Tyler Bryant out here and yet another sneak attack. Blanchard seems to have a real knack of taking Rodez from behind. MONEYMAKER If only. COLE What? MONEYMAKER What? I didn't hear anything. After some blows to the back, Ned wheels Leon around, whipping him to the ropes. A clothesline misses though. And with Blanchard knocked off balance by his wild swing, forward tumbles Leon, knocking Ned down with the SHACK ATTACK!! RODEZ COME ON YOU SUNNUVA BITCH!!! "YYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Oh no, this ain't good. COLE Oh boy, has Leon been waiting for this or what!? Ned rolls to his knees and despairingly begs off from the fired up New-Age Love Machine. Quickly, having landed with an undetected lowblow on Shayne Brave, Simon Singleton rushes in for the rescue. Rodez catches him coming in with a boot. But fighting off two men proves unwise and eventually The Blonds beat Leon down with forearms. MONEYMAKER You know, perhaps Leon should go back to his cute little 'nicest man in the OAOAST' phase. Because when you try and take on an Enterprise, you cant just focus on one section, one department. You're fighting an entire Enterprise and you have to realise, it's not person, it's strictly business. Together, the three-time OAOAST Tag Champions send the neutralised Rodez into the ropes. Drop toehold from Simon, the point of the elbow from Ned, patented Beverly Hills Blonds/NNMX, perhaps enough as Singleton makes a cover... 1... 2... No! Not enough! Spotting danger out of the corner of his eye, Ned quickly bumps Tyler Bryant off the apron. Meanwhile, Singleton has Rodez backed into a corner and pins him back with a blatant choke. Once Ned is ready he then whips Leon out, right into a heavy-duty clothesline that takes him right off his feet! High-five from The Blonds, the British crowd getting on their case as Simon mockingly 'rolls cameras'. COLE Okay, another question, Mister Moneymaker. Why are The Beverly Hills Blonds, or any Enterprise members for that matter, not entered into the Scramble Cage Match on August 2nd to unify the Tag Titles? MONEYMAKER Because, quite simply, there will be no 'Scramble Cage' once Mackenzie and Jade become OAOAST Tag Team Champions. They will decide what fate best serves the belts and we will work out a settlement with the HI-YAH Champions. Problem solved. The arrogant Blonds clearly think they have Rodez where they want him as they look for a double irish-whip and the Double Feature Flapjack. The first part of which is no problem. But as they duck their heads for the flapjacks, Leon manages to put on the brakes, kicking Singleton in the shoulder blade! Leon then looks to boot Ned too. However, Ned catches the foot and feeds his jaw, just daring the compromised Rodez to hit him. To his credit, Leon tries just that with an Enziguri. Only for Ned to duck... *SMACK!* ...leaving SINGLETON to take the kick!! BLANCHARD Aw, shit! Ned reels around, right into an Inverted Atomic Drop! Nursing his pride and joy, Ned leaves himself wide open, as Rodez connects with a jab! A jab! A jab! A jab! Rodez turns, blowing the kiss, before turning back on his heels... ...and getting cut off with a quick kick. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Smirking away to himself, Ned taps his temple to show how smart he is as he executes an irish whip. A one-handed irish whip isn't the wisest idea though. And sure enough, Leon stops at arm's length, swats the hand away... *SMACK!* ...and belatedly nails Blanchard upside the head with the enziguri! "YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT! Blanchard has enough about him to keep on rolling as he hits the mat, all the way out of the ring to prevent being pinned. So Rodez takes back over on Singleton, hauling him up and whipping him into a corner. Simon hits hard and begins to stagger out, only for Leon to crush him right back into the buckles with some Double Knees! And from there he hangs on, riding Simon all the way down and bringing him into an Inverted Lungblower! Clearly winded, Singleton uses the turnbuckles behind him to pull himself up and little else besides. Rather than follow up though, Rodez is forced to get out of the way, as CPA comes charging in... ...AND COLLIDES WITH SINGLETON, AVALANCHING HIM IN THE CORNER!! COACH Oh come on, not again! Why is this referee allowing this? COLE What, allowing two Enterprise members in the ring against one opponent? MONEYMAKER Yes! After a brief moment of shock at crushing his own partner, CPA re-sets his focus on Rodez. Even more angry than before he charges at The Silky Smooth One looking to make good on his attack this time. But Leon is quick enough to dive out of the way and CPA instead runs INTO A DOUBLE SUPERKICK FROM D*LUX!! The bigman rocks backwards, schoolboyed by Leon... 1... D*LUX guard off on the save... 2... NO, TWO!! COLE Wow, we almost had new 6-Man Tag Team Champions right there! As CPA starts to get back up, Leon quickly turns to his partners and gives them some quick directions. The trio of challengers then wait for CPA to turn around, luring him in... and connecting with not one, not two but THREE stereo Superkicks to the head area!! COLE Triple Superkick this time, that oughta do it! CPA topples like a big redwood and quick as a flash, Leon, Tyler and Shayne all pile on top of The Director Of Security... MONEYMAKER What the hell is this!? 1... 2... SAVE BY SINGLETON!! COACH Why the hell did the referee even count that!? There were three guys making the pin... [i]three[/i]! That's like... two more than there should be! MONEYMAKER You know, it's clear this referee needs a reminder of the rules. And if no-one else is willing to deliver it, I guess it's down to me. Moneymaker removes his headset and makes for the ring, while D*LUX take it to Simon Singleton. A couple of boots double The Video Voyeur up and D*LUX run the ropes... but get simultaneously low-bridged by Ned Blanchard, taking hard spills to the arena floor! COLE Oh! D*LUX down and... and now, Moneymaker is up on the apron! Referee Chioda rushes over to the CEO of The Enterprise, pointing him back down the arena floor. Moneymaker doesn't so much plead his case as rip into the referee for his officiating so far, providing a distraction as CPA lands with a hard closed fist on Rodez, the former professional boxer dropping him clean. Still the referee is distracted as CPA begins to haul the dazed Rodez up, Singleton's eyes now turning to the entrance way as CHRISTIAN WRIGHT comes charging out from the back!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh come on, it's a set-up! It's a damn set-up! COACH Just like Mister Moneymaker said, when you fight an enterprise, you fight the [i]entire[/i] Enterprise! Sliding his prized briefcase into the ring, Wright skulks back off just as soon as he arrived. With a satisfied smile on his face, he watches on as Singleton grabs the briefcase, CPA holding Leon upright. Singleton winds up like Sammy Sosa himself, checking for sure the referee is still pre-occupied before swinging for the fences... *THUD!* "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" ...AND KO'ING CPA AS RODEZ DROPS LOW JUST IN TIME!!! COACH NO! MISTER MONEYMAKER! SIR! CPA collapses, leaving Singleton with his head in his hands! The London crowd quickly encourage Leon to get the briefcase. But not willing to stoop to those lengths, Rodez instead waits for Simon to turn around and hoists him into a piggyback, cradling the head and SPIKING him with the Stunner! BANANA HAMMOCK! COLE This one's gonna be over! But damnit, Moneymaker is STILL on the apron!! COACH So? He can do whatever he wants, he's rich! COLE Please, he's no Lindsay Lohan. Smart enough to see a cover is pointless, Rodez gets straight back up and begins to make a move towards Moneymaker and the referee. But his path is suddenly blocked by Ned Blanchard, who sneaks back into the ring and lifts Rodez up. Caught completely by surprise, Leon is completely helpless as Ned then drops him back across the top-rope with the STUN GUN!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Right across the top ring-rope throat first! And the referee didn't see a thing! Sneaking around like a thief in the night, Ned grabs his KOed tag team partner by the hand and drops him across the chest of The Silky Smooth One. Blanchard then waves Moneymaker down and slides out of the ring, keeping Tyler Bryant at bay as the referee notices the 'cover'... 1... COLE Not like this! 2... 3!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" *DINGDINGDING!* COLE Ah, what a crock of... BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the match... and STILL OAOAST World 6-Man Tag Team Champions... CHRISTOPHER PATRICK ALLEN, CPA... and THE BEVERLY HIIIIIIIILLLSS BBLLLLLOOOONNDDSSSSSSSS!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Grabbing the belts, Moneymaker glides past D*LUX on the floor, Blanchard landing one last punch on Tyler before escaping with the boss. The duo collect Singleton as well before they make for the exits, no time apparently to drag the unconscious CPA with them unfortunately. Christian Wright joins his co-horts in the aisle and the four Enterprise members get themselves to a safe distance, Ned and Simon clutching the three 6-Man belts over their chests as they lie in the aisle, Moneymaker laughing away to the booing London fans. COLE The number advantage, yet again. And of course, these five are proud of themselves. The Enterprise steal another one at the expense of D*LUX and yet another of Leon Rodez, who had [i]this[/i] match won just like he had his match at The Bash won! Finally coming to, CPA rolls out of the ring and is waved over by his Enterprise buddies. Shayne Brave manages to roll into the ring and checks on Rodez, who has sat up holding his throat. Both glare out into the entrance way, as CPA is re-united with his team-mates and his belt and Moneymaker revels in the victory. MONEYMAKER :D Yeah. Like that. COLE Well, thankfully, there'll be no numbers advantage at AngleSlam. It'll be 5 on 5, all in! COACH What about Mackenzie? And Jade? And... that intern chick? COLE Molly Nerdly? COACH That her name, is it? COLE Well, I'm afraid you might be right. I think AngleSlam is going to be the closest we're going to get to an even match between The Enterprise and anyone. But, after this display, I'm worried about the future of the OAOAST World Tag Team Titles. What are we going to see later on tonight here in London, England?

Yes! Quack v. Claudio to steal the show.

Dream Partner Tag Team Match Landon Maddix and Tha Puerto Rican vs. Zack Malibu and ??? EDIT: Which might be a little late. Tommorrow at the latest.

Some time after Alf's battle royal please! -------------------------- The camera cuts to the backstage area where, limping through the hallways, Jamie O'Hara looks pretty dejected over his loss in the battle royal earlier. Kicking the ground, O'Hara curses to himself, still going over the mistakes in his head. In mid-curse though he's sent flying as suddenly NATHANIEL BLACK charges into view and wipes him out!! SCHIAVONE Hey... what the hell!? VENTURA He said he was gonna kick 'arse' and he didn't waste much time! Black stomps away on O'Hara, beating him down until any fight left after the battle royal seems to disappear. He then hauls O'Hara up by the wifebeater, grabbing him by the wrist and pulling him into a STIFF Clothesline! The back of O'Hara's head hits the floor HARD and he doesn't move a muscle there after. Besides a couple of groggy groans O'Hara is lifeless, as Black kneels down next to him. BLACK Now that was long overdue. Giving O'Hara a firm slap across the back of the head, Black marches off, leaving The Birmingham Bad Boy laying on the cold, hard floor. SCHIAVONE I tell you, I can't believe that! VENTURA Those two had hostility back in World Domination Wrestling. I guess there was some unfinished business that needed to be addressed. SCHIAVONE Unfinished business? Jesse, that was an unprovoked sneak attack, is what it was! VENTURA So? SCHIAVONE ...oh boy.

Okay EWC, hopefully this isn't a problem. But, if you could have the opening match, then this, then the 6-Man Tag Title Match afterwards, that'd be great. EDIT: But don't have the B&P Match as the opener. ---------------- SCHIAVONE Well Jess', a great way to kick off the show here. Our first show in jolly old England for quite a while and they are buzzing about the big main-event tonight, the 'Dream Partners Tag Team Match'. The question on everybody's lips is, just who is Zack Malibu's Dream Partner going to be as he takes on the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion Landon Maddix and his partner, Tha Puerto Rican? VENTURA You know Schiavone, it's pretty obvious, to me at least, that given the choice Zack's real 'dream partner' would be none other than American Idol winner, Kelly Clarkson! No offense to Candie if she's watching. However, I sure hope for his sake he's chosen a lot wiser than that, because he's gonna taking on his two AngleSlam opponents, both with one common goal. To take out one of the challengers and slash the odds of coming outta New York City as the World's Heavyweight Champion come August 26th! SCHIAVONE Well, a lot of speculation. Of course, we are here in England, so... Suddenly, Schiavone is forced to bail as someone has barged their way up into the announce position high in the arena. As Schiavone manages to avoid tripping over his chair, he and Jesse both step aside, as the suddenly excited crowd pick up the cause of the interrupting. NATHANIEL BLACK. NATHANIEL BLACK (in a thick Cockney accent) You know what, you're damn bloody right we're in London, England!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" BLACK And for all of you who don't know who I am, I am Nathaniel Black. England's #1. The UK's #1. Europe's #1. And right now, I've got somethin' to say! For the past month, I'd been workin' over at World Domination Wrestling on and off, rebuildin' my name over in America. Three years ago, I debuted for this stinking company and from day... bloody... ONE, I was mis-treated and mis-used by the jobsworth wankers in charge! They said my way of wrestlin', the British way of wrestlin', wasn't what an American audience wanted to see. And they told me I didn't have the 'charisma' or the personality to be a star. They told me that I'd never make it. And you know what. I told them to piss off and I went to Japan. Pacing around the small area around the table, Black runs his hand over his spiky hair. BLACK I made big in HI-YAH. I proved myself, to the point that I could come back to the US as an international star. But now... see now, I've got nowhere to go. The OAOAST has turned around and like the typical Yanks that they are, they fell like they're entitled to run the god-damn world! They've bought up HI-YAH. They've bought up WDW. And they've left me with no other options. "BLACK!" "BLACK!" "BLACK!" "BLACK!" BLACK You know, I sat on my arse for a month and I thought everything through. Yeah, a couple'a times, I consider jacking it all in. But then I realised somethin'. See, the entire reason I went to WDW in the first place was to show everybody who doubted Nathaniel Black in the OAOAST and all the Yanks who didn't respect me 'cause I wasn't Mr. Razzmatazz, just what I'd become. So, I dug that OAOAST contract outta the rubbish, signed it and shoved it in the post. And I waited for the OAOAST to finally step into my hometown of London, so I could give it the slap in the face it bloody well has coming!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" BLACK As of right now, I'm back in the OAOAST. And I am gonna do exactly what I set out to do in WDW. I'm gonna prove myself! I'm gonna prove that British is best! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" BLACK And I'm gonna damn well kick some OAOAST arse! Throwing down the mic, Black storms off from the announce position and back through the crowd where he came from. As he leaves through a sea of his fellow Londoners, Schiavone and Jesse re-compose themselves. SCHIAVONE Wow. Uhm... a very bitter Nathaniel Black there. VENTURA I'll tell you what Schiavone, these people here in London mighta agreed with every word he just said, but I can assure you he's not going to have made many friends across the ocean with that tirade! SCHIAVONE While we sort ourselves out up here, we'll down to Sofa Central. Michael Cole and The Coach standing by to call our next match, right after this...

Great Britain. [b][i][COLOR=blue]Rule Brittania[/b][/i][/COLOR] Regal. [b][i][COLOR=blue]Brittania rules the waves[/b][/i][/COLOR] Noble. [b][i][COLOR=blue]Britain never never never shall be slaves[/b][/i][/COLOR] Dignified. [b][i][COLOR=blue]Rule Britta...[/b][/i][/COLOR] Not to be messed with! [b][i][COLOR=red]Anarchy for the UK[/b][/i][/COLOR] Proud. [b][i][COLOR=red]It's coming sometime and maybe[/b][/i][/COLOR] Brave. [b][i][COLOR=red]I give a wrong time stop a traffic line[/b][/i][/COLOR] Ruthless. [b][i][COLOR=red]Your future dream is a shopping scheme[/b][/i][/COLOR] Powerful. [b][i][COLOR=red]Cause I... wanna be...Anarchy![/b][/i][/COLOR] Barbaric. [b][COLOR=red]NATHANIEL[/COLOR] [COLOR=blue]BLACK[/COLOR] Coming back to the OAOAST...[/b] BLACK Welcome to London... wankers. *************** COACH What's a 'wanker'? *Cole whispers into Coach's ear* COACH Oh. Hehehehehehe... 'wankers'. COLE Oh grow up. Anyway, what was that video about?

COLE Let's take it backstage, where our colleague Josh Matthews has caught up with The South Central Militia. We're transported back into the hub of all transport, at least transport heading into the arena tonight, the parking lot. (Boy, that was clunky. Even for me.) Vincent Santana and Marcellus Wallace are chilling and generally illing in front of their beat-up car. Vinny chugs away at his 40oz., leant across the hood of the car, with Wallace standing the other side, arms folded. MATTHEWS Hey, Josh Matthews outside the arena here in Des Moines and right now, I'm with one of the teams counting down the days until August 2nd, Minneapolis, Minnesota and the Scramble Cage Tag Title Unification Match. And Vinny, One Eye, it... WALLACE Yo, what did you jus' call me!? Realising his guests aren't quite as 'down' with the J.Math as he was banking on, Matthews stammers a little. MATTHEWS Uh, I... I thought that was your... WALLACE Unless you wanna end up wi'out an eyeball yo'self, ya'll better never call me that again! If I feels like callin' myself that, I will. Vinny, he wanna call me that, that's fine. We crew. You punk, you better watch yo' mouth, heard? With Moe's finger pointed right in his face, Josh certainly made sure he 'heard'. MATTHEWS O... okay. So, uh, to get back on topic... Scramble Cage is coming up in just one week's time and you have the chance to become the first ever, unified One And Only World Tag Team Champions. So... [b]*SMASH!*[/b] The 40oz. crashes into the ground, oz.'s flying everywhere to the shock of Matthews. SANTANA Listen, it's all real simple. Ya'll got six teams and they're gon'be locked up inside a steel cage. It's gonna be a fight. It's gonna be war. Fists gon' be flyin', bodies be flyin', blood, sweat, teeth, all in one lil' steel surrounded battleground. Trill talk, that's how we do in South Central! Me an' One Eye, mah boy Marcellus here, we grew up in South Central L.A, fighting for every opportunity we ever gots in life. We ain't never had a damn thing handed to us by no-one, besides white flags n' bodybags. An' hell, we been locked up our fair share o' times too. So, you wanna lock up twelve of the OAOAST's 'finest' and see who survives, lemme spit game to ya, there ain't nobody gonna fuck wit' us! I mean, for real, you got a couple'a boyband faggots, two apple-pie eatin' college wrestlin' bitches, those West Hollywood motherfuckin' dykes who we still got major beef with... WALLACE And we ain't talkin' bout the roast beef hangin' between Krista's legs neither. MATTHEWS :O SANTANA Then there's Logan an' Synth, 'The Rockers'. Rap v. rock. Well lemme tell ya, they be Aerosmith and we're Run DMC, representin'. We gonna break through that wall and we're gonna kick their skinny, long-haired, trout-lipped asses 'till they shut the hell up, for real! And then... SOUL (off-screen) And then, you got us brothaaaaa. All eyes turn off screen, as in walk RICO DE JANIERO and LUCIUS SOUL, The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew! Sliding off of the car hood, Vinny stands beside Marcellus ready for a fight. Lucius holds up his hands and motions for them to calm down though, Rico just stroking his 'stache in the background. SANTANA Yo, you wanna throw down!? You wanna go!? SOUL Gentlemen, gentlemen, [i]gentlemen[/i]. We couldn't help but overhear you two guys talkin' over here and we just had to come over before ya'll got too far ahead of yo'selves. Now, you and I are not so dissimiliar. Oh no. See, yours truly Lucius Soul, he grew up on the streets too. New Orleans isn't quite South Central I'll admit, but ya know, I feel a kinda kinship with you two. I'm 'down'. WALLACE This goin' somewhere? SOUL Indeed it is! See, mah sources have told me that you two gentlemen are in the field of 'protection', if ya catch my drift. Well, it just so happens that myself and Rico here have a proposition for ya'll. Lucius reaches into the inside pocket of his jacket and pulls out a wad of bills. SOUL Hehheh... go ahead, feast your eyes. This right here my friends is twenty five [i]thousand[/i] of my own dollars. All you've gotta do is make sure me and my main man Rico here... RICO *strokes 'stache* SOUL ...walk outta Minneapolis with those OAO tag straps to replace these here HI-YAH Tag Titles. Taking a second to think about it, The Militia smirk back at Lucius. WALLACE No deal. SOUL Heh... I believe there's some mistake here. See, I was lead to believe that you were 'for hire', wink wink. Doesn't matter who, just how much, that ring any bells for ya both? WALLACE Sounds like somethin' we'd say, yeh. SANTANA But not August 2nd. Scramble Cage dawg, s'all 'bout us. We ain't fightin' for money, we're fightin' for our pride. And we're fightin' for those belts we get straight robbed of! So, you two dress-up pedophile bitches gonna get bitch-slapped 'round that cage just like everybody else, belie'dat! You best spend that cash on life insurance or somethin'. Trying to keep himself cool and collected, Lucius straightens up his jacket and holds his hands up again. SOUL We'll see you guys next week then. No hard feelings. Lucius turns tail and storms off, with Rico shooting a quick glare at The Militia before following after his ranting partner. Watching on, Vinny and Moe smile to themselves as we go back to the arena. COACH Wow, battle of the suggestive ethnic accents or what! I've never seen so many apostrophes! COLE .....

Back on HeldDOWN~! and Big Things Poppin' is already playing, as we find James Blonde and his erstwhile Samoan partner Faqu on their way to the ring. BUFFER This tag-team contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing, team number one. First from Vancouver, British Columbia and weighing in at two hundred pounds... JJJAAAAAMMMEEEEEESSS... BBLLLLLOOOOONNDDEEEEEE!! And his tag team partner. Hailing from the Isle of Samoa! He weighs in tonight at three hundred and one pounds... FFFAAAAAAAAAQQUUUUUUUUUU!!! A mixed reception greets the duo as they make their way down the aisle. Blonde leads the way making a confident speech to the nearest camera, leaving Faqu trailing slowly behind. The big Samoan looks stoicly ahead as he climbs the steps. BUFFER And in the ring. First, two hundred ten pounds, from Miami, Florida, TJ MASON! And his partner, from Davenport, Iowa, one hundred eighty six pounds, CAMERON COLE! The two rookies soak up their moment in the spotlight, Wilson letting out a load roar to the cameras as Cole waves to his fellow Iowa natives. Their youthful exuberance doesn't last long once Faqu makes the apron though. Both the unknowns watch on wide-eyed as Faqu steps into the ring and shoots a death glare in their direction. COLE We saw Faqu and Blonde a couple of weeks ago and they were impressive in their victory over Los Diablos De Fuego. And we also saw a different attitude out of these two former HI-YAH superstars. Now, I spoke to them both earlier... well, I saw 'both', I spoke to James Blonde, who also spoke for his partner. And needless to say, they are both very bitter over the takeover of their previous employers, HI-YAH Promotions, by the OAOAST. COACH Can you blame them? Shit's getting out of hand Michael, AngleSault's got some sort of power fix goin' on. First he buys up HI-YAH, now he's buying up WDW, putting people out of work, changing people's lives with the stroke of a pen. And now, guys like Faqu and James Blonde gotta come back to an already over-crowded locker room of like 85 people who get one match every month and a half? Faqu was the HI-YAH Champ for over a year! He was the man! Now, none of it counts for jack! I don't blame them for being pissed. Giving his partner a pat on the back, Blonde agrees to let his partner start. The short straw seems to have been drawn by Cameron Cole on the opposite side. *DINGDINGDING!* COACH Hey, this guy isn't a relative of yours, is he? COLE Not that I'm aware of. Cole bravely walks out of his corner and approaches Faqu, waiting for a lock-up. But Faqu has other ideas, knocking him down flat with an open handed thrust to the throat! "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COACH You know, maybe you should look into it, you might be his next of kin. With Cole left looking up at the lights, Faqu glances over at Wilson. He holds his hands up in penance, as slowly Faqu reaches down and drags Cole to his feet. An irish whip sends Cole forcefully into a neutral corner, so forcefully infact that the already weakened rookie falls back on his ass, sat up against the bottom turnbuckle. And with a loud cry of "SAMOA!", Faqu charges in after his opponent, driving his posterior into Cole's face at full speed!! COACH WOAH! COLE Man, Cameron Cole's head snapped back violently on that move. Where the hell did that come from!? COACH Samoa? Once his head ceases rolling around his shoulders, Cole goes limp against the buckle. Faqu drags him right out and to his feet though, scooping and slamming the youngster down before tagging in the eager James Blonde. Blonde goes straight for Wilson for some reason though, bumping him off the apron before going after Cole. The unneccessary tactic doesn't even draw Wilson into the ring, not that Blonde really cares, as he drops a Double Stomp across the chest of Cole and covers, lazily... 1... 2... No! COLE Not enough, this kid has got that fighting Cole family spirit in him! Blonde shrugs it off and tags Faqu back into the match. A little unprepared for being tagged back in so soon, Faqu takes a second to get into the ring, allowing Cole to start crawling to his corner. A slow, pained crawl, Faqu just strolling past Cameron and kicking him IN THE FACE before he can reach his corner. COACH YO~! COLE Now that was a little unneccessary. However, for some reason, Faqu then picks up and pitches Cole into the corner anyway, allowing the tag to be made. Happy for whatever small mercies he's given, Wilson rushes right into the ring ready to take over... ...and gets bowled over with a hard clothesline from the Samoan Wrecking Ball! COLE Seems like Faqu wants some fresh competition, if that's the right word in this situation. Which it isn't. Gamely getting back to his feet, Wilson at least puts up a fight and throws a forearm. He gets caught by the throat though and shoved back into the enemy corner, Faqu engulfing him in there with an Avalanche a second later! Tag is made and Blonde is legal again. With Wilson still stuck in the corner, behind Faqu's 300 plus pound frame, Blonde gets a run-up from across the ring. Clothesline in the corner, followed up by a Bulldog out of it and James Blonde quickly tells his partner to put the finishing touches on the helpless Wilson, the big Samoan dropping across the spine with a Big Splash and crushing the Floridian! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Damn, that's like a house falling on you! Or at the very least, a pretty large mobile home. Still the beating isn't over though. Blonde sits TJ back up and leans down on the neck, while passing instructions to Faqu. COLE This is nothing more than for display purposes right now. Faqu and Blonde are sending out a message to the OAOAST locker room, through these two young prospects. COACH I don't think these kids have many prospects anymore. Real estate maybe. With the message getting across, Blonde finally pulls TJ up to his feet, dragging him into a short knee to the gut and passing him off. Faqu takes Wilson in with a double underhook and takes him up... ...and DOWN with a Butterfly Piledriver, just spiking the rookie on his head!! COACH Now, that's a message I'd heed. COLE Ditto. Faqu presses Wilson down, no sign of his partner to save... 1... 2... 3!! *DINGDINGDING!* Faqu stands over Wilson and lets out a guttaral roar as his partner strolls over, patting him on the back before tapping his wrist, a not so subtle hint to the referee to raise it in victory. BUFFER Your winners of the match... JAMES BLONDE and FAAAAAQQQUUUUUUUU!!! COLE Dominant, just about the only word to sum that up. James Blonde and Faqu making a big statement here in Des Moines tonight at the expense of what was admittedly some 'lesser' competition. COACH No kidding. One of them was called 'Cole', which is your last name! COLE Thanks for letting me in on that tidbit. As Blonde and Faqu walk away from the carnage left in the ring, Blonde calls over the nearest TV camera. Leaning across the shoulder of the deeply breathing Samoan next to him, a smile fills the face of The Mover From Vancouver. And with a raise of the eyebrows, he ominously warns that this was "just a sign of things to come." before he and Faqu walk off.

Uhm, no Singleton/Brave either I'm afraid. EDIT: Patty, just say it's a short show because everybody's got to be in England in two days or something. That's continuity for you. Jetlag's a bitch after all.

Shouldn't that be *clap* *clap* *clapclapclap*? Oh yes they can, think of the merchandise sales they could make from an ugly 'RKO logo' spinner belt. Or a 'D-X logo' spinner belt, the holy grail of merchandise that kids will force their parents into buying for them.

Well, I would say Orton. He's been booked into the ground every time he got over (moronic face turn, no-hoper against HHH, the career destroying Undertaker feud) and his credibility has taken knock after knock. Being the next John Cena victim would pretty much be the deathknell. But if the plan is still Cena>Orton>HHH for the title, it's not going to matter anyway. If they're serious about Orton as WWE Champion (a heel WWE Champion), I'm all for it.

Name: Nathaniel Black Age: 27 Height: 6ft. 3 Weight: 238lbs Hometown: London, England Alignment: Heel Stable Affiliation: Internationally Known (w/Faqu, James Blonde) Wrestling style: Think part British, part Japanese for style influences. Theme music: "Chelsea Dagger", The Fratellis Entrance Style: The lights alternate between red, white and blue through the intro, with Black coming out after that. Black raises his arms in the air, generally shouting his mouth off to the fans on his way to the ring. Black climbs the steps and enters, climbing the ropes and punching his fists into the air with a shout. Ring attire: Black tights with a white Union Jack design on the rear and purple panels on the hips. Black kneepads, taped wrists. Black boots with white laces and purple trim. Finishing Move(s): Brittania Bomb- Pyramid Bomb, a Straightjacket Sitout Powerbomb Crossface Chickenwing Signature Moves Chelsea Dagger- Final Cut/Eye Of The Hurricane Black Lariat- Roaring Clothesline Hammerlock DDT- Applies a hammerlock, positions himself in front and kicks the near leg out, dropping the opponent forwards Half Nelson Backbreaker Seated Butterfly Lock Flying Knee Drop/Flying Knee Attack/Running Knee Attack European Uppercuts Headbutts (none of that 'headbutting your hand into someone's head' crap, clean headbutts) Basic moveset: Submission/mat wrestling, with some heavy striking. Tends to work on the arm if going for the submission. *Doesn't punch* Substitute any punches for elbow strikes please. Manager/valet/sidekick: None Catchphrases/Trademark gestures: The British v-sign (the 'up yours' kind, not the 'victory' kind) Speaks in a thick Cockney accent History/Background/Career Highlights: Englishman Black debuted in the OAOAST in 2004 as part of the oh, so memorable Glory By Anarchy (!?) team with Jasper Romero. After a short 'push' as the kids like to say, the GBA quickly faded out of the limelight in the crowd OAOAST tag division though, unable to sustain popularity amongst the wacky gimmicks and flamboyant personalities. So, the duo were shipped to HI-YAH, where their strengths were accentuated and their weaknesses were not so clear in front of Japanese audiences. Black and Romero enjoyed much more success in Japan and Black reached the finals of the tournament to crown a new HI-YAH Heavyweight Champion in June of 2005. Eventually though, the team ran it's course. Black and Romero split and went their seperate ways, which involved Black returning to England and touring Europe. Black has since become embittered with the company that wrote him off and the American wrestling culture as a whole and sought to return to the US, to prove that there's no substitute for pure wrestling ability. Pure British wrestling ability. Losing his shame over his accent and pride in his country has co-incided with an arrogance rising inside of him. An image change helped to get his foot back in the door and Black threw an 'up yours' to the OAOAST by signing a contract with World Domination Wrestling. However, now that WDW is gone, Black has been returned to the OAOAST, with an even greater point to prove. Titles Held OAOAST 6-Man Tag Team Championships - March 30th, 2008 - Current (w/James Blonde and Faqu)

EDIT: Nevermind, already said a dozen times. Must read thread before posting. Stop over-reacting to everything that happens, pro or con in Punk's career like he's RVD or something. Thank you.

Watch The Bash again and that's pretty much your answer. Lashley does a few basic amateur moves on Cena and naturally, because Cena doesn't have the amateur background, he gets for the lack of a better word 'owned' and looks completely out of his depth. Seriously, all Lashley did was shoot low and push him in the stomach a little, Cena didn't have an answer for it. Might have been the whole point of that sequence, sure. But it made Cena look inept as a wrestler. Which is a no-no. Look at who Lashley HAS used the amateur stuff on. Finlay, Benoit, Benjamin... that's about it, all guys who could at least look competitive. Factor in the company's opinion as a whole on pure wrestling and there ya go. It's not like the people in charge don't know who's a good wrestler and who isn't. They just gave Jamie Noble a road agent type job after pretty much doing zero with him as a wrestler, going to prove that it doesn't really matter how good you are, it's about making people who aren't so good look good. Ass backwards logic? Sure. But it's the WWE way I guess.

^ Wrong. SJK: Keenan got over great in 1PW, which had a more loaded line-up than most ROH shows. Once he moved away from being CM Punk lite.

So, wait. Heels having to pull tights and hold ropes to win is being advocated now!? And don't hate on Hornswaggle. He's more popular than the rest of the division combined. It could be much worse.