Fro

We'll see how he does with Angle (hopefully they give them some time)... but he looked really good.

Okay, here's the report for last night's show... OVW TV for 3/12/05 Let the Bodies Hit the Floor! - Our hosts are Jim Cornette and the "Booming Bass" of Dean Hill. Tonight we'll see M-N-M v.s. the Heartbreakers for the #1 Contendership for the Southern Tag Titles, and talk to Danny Inferno and the Thrillseekers. Beat the Champ TV Title Match Brent Albright (champion) v.s. Lance "I got my name back since Lance Storm retired" Cade Cade does the tired Texas horns sign that every Stan Hansen wannabe does. Crowd chants "Big Bird" at Cade. They lockup. Cade controls and pushes Albright into the corner. Ref breaks it up. They lock up again and Cade secures a headlock, Albright reverses into an armbar, but Cade reverses again into a DDT which Albright blocks and they end the tieup. Crowd chants at Cade again. Cade gets a headlock into an armbar, Albright reveres and hits Cade with a forearm. Cade claims there was a hair pull. Cade kicks Albright and clubberin commences him with some generic Stan Hansen/Barry Windham wannabe offense. Why can't a guy from Texas learn some different moves? Albright finally kicks Cade and goes for an armbreaker, but Cade takes a powder. Dean Hill calls Cade a "crafty veteran"... JR will be calling him a "young rookie" for the next ten years. Cade gets back in the ring and gets clotheslined... Albright goes to lock in the crowbar but Cade escapes and bails from the ring. Albright follows him out of the ring but gets hit with the LARIATO~! outside. Ok, that was kinda nice. Albright gets hotshotted on the steel guardrail outside the ring (The guardrail is way superior to those stupid barricades they have now). Back in the ring, Cade covers for a 2 count. Neckbreaker gets to as we go to the... -- Ad Break Nick Dinsmore signs his arm off for YOU... for FREE... if you come to OVW in Elizabethtown! Who cares what the card is, see EUGENE LIVE and have him sign a bunch of crap! Cornette has finally mixed it up and quit using the lava lamp backgrounds for the OVW ad shills. Epilepsy cares in Louisville just went down by 20% -- Albright hits an elbow on Cade. Cade hits a russian legsweep for 2, then hits a belly-to-back suplex. Crowd distracts Cade with the "Big Bird" chants. Cade goes for a vertical suplex but Albright reverses and goes for a rollup.. Cade holds onto the ropes, then ducks an Albright clothesline and hits a DDT. Cade goes up top for the Randy Savage elbowdrop but it misses! I make a note to myself that I smell a ten-minute draw coming on. They do the double ko spot as the ref counts to ten. Albright gets up and hits an armbreaker on Cade. Cade backs off and uses the ref as a shield, then clocks Albright with an "illegal closed fist" for 2. They trade punches and Albright hits an Anglesque belly-to-belly overhead suplex. Hill announces two minutes left Hill really makes Lillian Garcia look bad as he does timekeeping, ring announcing, interviewing and color commentary all at once, yet Lillian can't even do simple ring announcing. Albright hits a belly to back for 2. Kick, punch, elbow strick and another 2 count. Kneelift by Cade, Cade whips him around, Albright ducks a forearm but Cade hits him with SWEET CHIN MUSZACK. One minute left. Cade gets a 2 count. Cade sets up in the corner for another Stevie Kick but this time, Albright catches his foot and reverses into a rollup. They trade more punches. Albright blocks a blow and locks in the crowbar on Cade! Crowd chants "break his arm"! There are only 15 seconds left as Hill counts down the time. The bell rings and Cade immediately starts tapping out afterwards. Crowd chants for "five more minuntes". Cornette hits the ring and Cade smartly goes crazy, stealing the $1000 check from the ref and generally being all intense and pushing Cornette around the ring. This shuts the crowd up. Cade says Albright was doing an awful lot of punching for supposedly being such a great wrestler. Albright says it's my money. Cornette says they're going to hold up the check for next week, and next week it's going to be a no time limit match. Fun Sunday Night Heat-level match and good postmatch segment. - Ad F'N Break - Danny Infero and Trudi are out. Inferno says he's like the Davis Arena fans as he's a hard workin man to had to work for everyone he's done and Aaron "The Idol" Stevens is a rich kid who never had to work. This is like a subpar version of a Dusty Rhodes/Ric Flair promo. Says Stevens is no real man. Next week, it's a Jersey Shore Streetfight with Inferno and Stevens. Didn't we just have one of these a few weeks ago that ended in a no-contest? Anyway, *THIS* Jersey Shore Streetfight is under Texas Death Match rules. Trudi finally talks... and she has a STRONG southern accent. I guess she's from the "south side" of the Jersey Shore? Anyway, this pleases the Davis Arena crowd who chants for her. Inferno says Stevens' ass belongs to me. Medicore promo Update on the S. Tag Team Champs... NEXT - Elijah Burke and Alexis Laree are reduced to begging for money for the WHAS Crusade for Children (a local charity telethon) in the crowd. Let US take you back to last week when M-N-M were cutting a promo: (cue nifty new dissolve... did someone buy some new video editing software?) Matthews says a bunch of funny stuff making fun of Cornette but I'm too lazy to write it down. He's basically saying they deserve another tag title shot and the Heartbreakers are no obstacle. Melina calls Mo Greene a "midget" which is funny because she's not big herself. The Heartbreakers come out and a bunch of guys come out parodying M-N-M's entrance with a pink carpet, guys with confetti, guys with signs, a couple clowns with balloon animals, a bellydancer, a juggler, and finally the Heartbreakers with a GUY IN A FREAKING BANANA SUIT!! The Heartbreakers knock the guy down and start grinding on both ends of the banana as I start rolling on the floor. Hey Michaels, your banana jokes just got pwned. Anyway, the Heartbreakers are way over as faces which surprises me. They cut a Too Much esque promo with some crazy Brian Christopher laughing. Mo Greene says after the match, he'll take Melina as a hoe down on 7th street. What the hell happened... it's a SUDDEN dissolve to The Thrillseekers v.s. The Tolands (aka the Blond Bombers) from last week. Thrillseekers hit some nifty doubleteams. and hit a double superkick on one of the Tolands. M-N-M run in to break up the match and the Heartbreakers make the save. Mo Greene and Melina were rolling all over the place here. Thrillseekers offer their hands to the Heartbreakers and after some hesistation, they shake their hands and then step over with the Thrillseeker's arms between their legs and do some gay antics. -- We are back to "live action" now. Thrillseekers are out for a promo. This is probably going to be painful. Indyriffic promo about how they don't care who wins M-N-M/Heartbreakers and that the Tolands shouldn't get a title shot.. Jeter sounds like Heyman's been working with him this week on promos, but it doesn't help much. Mercifully, the Tolands are out to save the segment. Tank says they're not getting any respect and they deserve another title shot. Matt takes the stick and cracks a midget joke at the Tolands. The Thrillseekers say they're going to have to beat another team to get a shot and says they're out of the tag title picture. Tolands say they're going to make their presence felt in the division. I smell a run-in in the next match. -- Ad Break -- #1 Contender's Match: M-N-M (w/ Melina) v.s. The Heartbreakers (w/ Mo Greene) Is Vince Russo booking... two matches in a hour? Melina looks like Carmen Electra this week. She's probably got about 7-inch heels on or something ridiclous. Heartbreakers come out to a big pop and they show some little kids in the front row dressed up like them. M-N-M break up the gay pattiecake dancing which Cornette acts like is the most heinous act ever (when a few weeks ago he was acting like the Heartbreakers' dancing was the worst). Double ass grab on M-N-M clears the ring to a big pop. Yes, folks, the Heartbreakers are the first face gay team in the history of wrestling. Match finally starts. There is a nice exchange of moves and one of the Heartbreakers gets a crossbody for 2 on Nitro. Matthews comes in and gets a double gay headbutt and a double gay wishbone doubleteam. Crowd pops big for this. Antonio gets a big splash for 2. Romeo is in and gets a headlock. He keeps kick Nitro's hand off the ring ropes whenever Matthews goes to tag him in a cool spot. Nitro gets frustated and comes in, and Romeo backdrops him while he's still headlocking Nitro. Romeo rolls Matthews over while the does a headscissors on Nitro! Both Heartbreakers roll up M-N-M for two. The ring is cleared and M-N-M try to leave the arena but the Heartbreakers stop them and carry them back to the ring. Romeo and Matthews finally back in the ring. Nitro trips Romeo. Nitro takes in and M-N-M double stomp them in the corner. -- Ad Break -- We're back and Romeo is getting stomped in the corner. Lots of cheating ensues, Melina choking him on the ropes, etc for a couple minutes. Crowd is way into it. I get lazy because I see the run-in coming. Romeo finally makes the hot tag and Antonio comes in a house of fire and hits some monkeyflips and a couple 80s moves. Ref gets bumped. The Heartbreakers hit their "Ereticle Dysfunction" finisher on Matthews It just turns into a melee with Mo Greene and Melina rolling around. The Tolands run out and start beating up the Heartbreakers. The Thrillseekers are out. A bunch of refs and wrestlers come out from the back but nobody can break it up. We're out of time... see you next week! Another solid show, although there were a couple holes in the booking that usually aren't present. The promo work was very disappointing this week from the Thrillseekers and Danny Inferno. I suspect there will be a four corners elimination match in a couple weeks which should be fantastic and get about 30 minutes.

It's too bad they don't have Heyman or Russo around who would actually book this into a fun pseudo-shoot. WWE has whittled its fanbase down to the hardcore fans who are going to read the net, or have friends who read the net. The only real problem with turning it into an angle is you have to get Kane out of the equation.

Given that he looked like he saw a ghost, I think they want to give us the impression it was Leben, anyway.

Actually Swinger will probably be in OVW/Mythical Georgia territory for the next year or two before you ever see him.

Steve Keirn (Skinner) was one, a guy named Ray Apollo was the 4th

I'd say Cornette is better because he's a great booker when he has full control (SMW or OVW) and he's a FANTASTIC announcer in OVW... every bit as good as Ross in his prime. He's actually better as a PBP guy than a color guy. So I think he's better than Heenan for that reason. There's no question Heenan is funnier though.

Awesome. I need to pick up some of the older OVW shows methinks, from the sounds of this thread. Especially with The Bashams, if only to see what potential's currently being wasted. Start off with a tape of August 2003... Doug v.s. Damaja... loser leaves town.

Hard to say, though. Backlund could have been a heat magnet with his crazy old man gimmick. -=Mike "Old" Backlund was quite a bit younger than Flair, Hogan, and Terry Funk's various reigns with the belt.

Morgan has shown *great* mic skills in OVW. He could really be someone in WWE. He's still not great in the ring, but he's a couple steps above Snitsky and Heidenreich and has some cool moves. He's been using Abyss's black hole slam and a delayed vertical suplex which he drops down into a DDT.

The problem is the hosses get called up too early, and the guys that can work get cut off at the knees. And guys who have no business being in WWE (Grenier, Heidenreich, etc get called up). Snitsky was only in OVW for a couple months. Morgan is pretty decent now and cuts fantastic promos. Remember, Cena and Orton were super-vanilla babyfaces, and Batista was D-Von Dudley's flunkie a couple years ago. They've screwed up majorly with a lot of OVW guys. I've talked about Conway and the Bashams and how good their OVW stuff was. Rico was seriously AS GOOD AS JERICHO on the mic in OVW and he never got beyond being a manager in WWE. OVW is stocked full of guys who are too small for Vince to push as main eventers, but are over and would be good in Tag Teams. Instead, we get Chris Masters as a single who's going to majorly flop, instead of Albright/Masters who would be infinitely more interesting than La Resistance as tag champs. We get Mordecai and Tomko as singles who are terrible, instead of a tag team that makes them something of value. They could probably use another system that would be a bigger promotion than OVW. The real problem is lack of competition at this point. If a couple guys would leave WWE and go to TNA and vice-versa (and both companies were at similar levels), we wouldn't have this problem. It's *extremely* rare to find a guy who can have the combination of wrestling ability, looks, charisma, political skills, and experience who can survive a couple years of being lost in the wilderness in WWE to become a main eventer.

I like Mac Johnson too. He plays the Southern Tag Team Babyface real well. He's probably about 6'ish and was pretty lanky when he debutted last year, but he's been on the juice pretty hard. He's a "high flyer" by OVW standards, which isn't staying much. He's still a bit green but is improving at a good clip.

Didn't have time to do a report this week, but this was probably the best show workrate wise of the year. Mondo goes all Bret Hart on Lewington & Dudleys/MNM really picked up at the end after looking like it was the Dudleys phoning it in.

OVW Wrestlers are under either a contract with OVW (which usually states they can't wrestle for other promotions without permission) or are WWE developmental guys. The only guy who is a true Cruiserweight is Mike Mondo... none of these guys besides him are CW size although they're not hosses either (which is good). MIKE MONDO Awesome wrestler, but he's not much under 5' tall. Snitsky was brought in as his brother "Mean Gene" Mondo and generally ripped Mike Mondo's current look. I would imagine he'd be a manager (he's managing Blaster Lasheley along with Bolin right now) or be a designated comedy jobber ala Crash Holly. DANNY INFERNO Would be a heavyweight. Quite a bit bigger than Nova. Decent... would be good in a tag team. I'm pretty sure this isn't the Inferno Kid... he seems like he's about 6'2"-6'3". MIKE TAYLOR Stealing a lot of WWE moves right now, but he's had a couple decent matches. Too early to tell how good he is. He's sort of built a bit, probably around 5'10"-6' ish JOEY MATTHEWS Very awesome.... great on the mic. Excellent signing. I'm going to be pissed if they don't keep he, Nitro, and Melina together because they're GOLD. That unit would instantly be the top tag team in the company. JOHN ROSELLI In tag team matches with a "gay" gimmick with Antonio Thomas as the Heartbreakesr. Has potential and I've heard from a couple people he was pretty good before OVW. STEVE LEWINGTON I like what I've seen from him so far and he's gotten quite over with the Louisville crowd. Cuts a decent promo too, but the sample size here is limited. All these guys have been in OVW for a few months at least. Inferno, Mondo, Matthews for at least a year so I have pretty good opinions on them. Lewington/Roselli/Taylor only recently popped up on TV.

America needs an opposition party. I don't think the Dems under Dean can even remotely fit the bill. -=Mike The republicans are scared to death of Dean, and with good reason. Dean is a former Governor who: 1) Balanced the Budget every year and left a $10 million surplus in 2003 2) Holds multiple A-ratings from the NRA 3) pro-NAFTA 4) pro business over environment (as the son of a former executive for Dean-Witter) 5) Supported the first Gulf War (unlike Kerry), Somalia, Kosovo, Bosina, Afganistan 6) Started a school voucher program in Vermont 7) pro Death Penalty 8) cut welfare spending 9) Stephen Moore, the President of the right-wing Club for Growth, called Dean "a free-market enthusiast, a tax cutter, and an enemy of big-government excess." in early 2003 and said they had "finally found a Democrat [they] could work with." Yeah, he sure sounds like a real liberal to me. The Republicans will paint anyone as "too liberal" for the US because they've had great success with that frame.

Heat 1. Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin © beat Val Venis (9:05) with the T-Bone Suplex. 2. Gene Snitsky beat The Hurricane (3:37) with a Pump-handle Slam. 3. Kane beat Gene Snitsky (7:17) with a Chokeslam. (Dark Match?) 4. Mohammed Hassan beat Rhyno (5:02) with a Camel Clutch. RAW 1. Chris Benoit beat Chris Jericho (9:38) with the Crippler Crossface. 2. Batista beat Maven (0:32) with the Batista Bomb. 3. World Tag Team Titles: Tajiri & William Regal beat Rob Conway & Sylvian Grenier © (4:35) when Tajiri used theBuzzsaw Kick on Grenier to win the World Tag Team Titles. 4. Shawn Michaels beat Ric Flair (10:17) with the Sweet Chin Music. 5. Randy Orton beat Tyson Tomko (5:10) with a Schoolboy. 6. World Heavweight Title: HHH © beat Edge (16:49) with the Pedigree. Akebono (famous Hawaiian sumo wrestler who was the first foreign Yokozuna) was at ringside for this match. (this was worked Japanese style apparently with handshakes after the match and everything) Steve Williams and Shibata were in attendance as well. I believe Johnny Ace had a meeting with Misawa and NOAH and talked a bit about working with the WWE in the future. From deathvalleydriver.com Update: Zach Arnold is reporting that they did a skit with Simon Dean and Akebono and that Akebono and HHH shook hands.

Firstly, unfortunately there's going to be no OVW recap this week because my cable company is having problems picking up the signal from the bush league station it airs on. Fertig wasn't any better in OVW, but he was in a tag team with Tomko so it kind of hid both of them. They also rarely wrestled on TV. As far as Burchill goes, he's supposed to be on the way to OVW. May be months before he debuts on TV though.

Can you say "dark match"?

Come Again? Sorry, it's Kane d. Snitsky, and probably a dark match.

OVW TV Report for 1/29/2005 by Jeff Wahlman Email: [email protected] OVW Valley Wrestling Taped from the Davis Arena in Louisville, KY on 1/26/2005 Commentators: Jim Cornette and "The Prince of Pronunciation" Dean Hill Let the Bodies Hit the Floor! It's OVW! Tonight... live we talk to the new Southern Tag Champs the Thrillseekers. Tonight Blaster Lasheley has another match in the $100 a minute challenge. Tonight, in our main event Elijah Burke versus a Mystery Man. But first, we'll crown our first OVW TV Champion! OVW Beat the Champ TV Title Match Seth Skyfire v.s. "The Shooter" Brent Albright Chris Kay is your referee. There is a ten minute time limit. Skyfire and Albright have been selected by a random drawing and the winner of the match will receive $1000 dollars and be crowned the "Beat the Champ" OVW TV Title holder. This should be good. Collar and Elbow tieup, Skyfire puts on a wristlock which Albright quickly reverses into a wristlock of his own and throws Skyfire down. Skyfire nips and rolls up and reverses the wristlock and throws Albright down. Albright kicks Skyfire down from the floor to break the hold. Double nipup, and Skyfire does a front roll afterwards to show off. They exchange shoves, Skyfire ducks a clothesline and hops on Albright's back and goes for a crucifix rollup, then spins around into a rana that takes Albright out of the ring! Clothesline ducked,wheelbarrow powerbomb attempt by Albright countered into an arm drag! Monkey flip, dropkick, 2 count. Goes for the wheelbarrow powerbomb counter again, but Albright german suplexes him and he does the Kurt Angle moonsault sell!! Albright shoves Skyfire's arm into the corner and then dropkicks his arm! Cornette reminds us that Matt Morgan, the Tolands, and Chris Cage are all still off the show. Albright steps on Skyfire's arm and revs back on it. Overhead hammerlock suplex by Albright gets a couple two counts. Albright jaws with the ref, allowing Skyfire to get a couple shots in. Albright recovers and throws Skyfire shoulder first into the ring post and flies out of the ring! Albright uses the floor and the guardrail outside the ring to work on Skyfire's arm. Hammerlock on Skyfire. Skyfire breaks the hold but Albright puts the hammerlock back on and hits a belly-to-back suplex with the arm still hammerlocked! Snapmare and a grapevine/keylock on Skyfire's arms. Albright runs into an elbow and Skyfire hits a couple clotheslines. Spin kick gets 2! Albright catches Skyfire coming off the ropes and gets him in a spinebuster position, but Skyfire reverses into a tornado DDT!! Kick by Skyfire is ducked, but shining enziguri connects for 2.9. Skyfire goes up top but Albright catches him and drops his arm from the top on his shoulder. He locks in the crowbar! Skyfire tries to get to the ropes but he's in the middle of the ring and he can't even budge Albright. Cornette says he's never seen anyone last this long in the crowbar. Crowd chants "Go Seth Go". The OVW trainer comes out and throws in the towel! Crowd chants "bullshit". Skyfire is seriously hurt. Cornette sells it as a possible dislocated shoulder. Nice opener with a lot of very crisp wrestling. I think these guys are capable of having a really great match with each other down the road. Winner: Brent Albright (New TV Champ) Rating ** 3/4 Albright grabs the check and yells at Cornette that he can't be beat and he won't be beat. Meanwhile Skyfire is being attended to in the ring. Cornette sells it as a possible dislocated shoulder. -- OVW at the Derby Park Expo 5... see OVW Matches and then the Royal Rumble for only $10! OVW Fundraisers! -- Let us take you back to the ring where Seth Skyfire is being helped out of the ring. Now let us take you back to last week's Southern Tag Team Title match between the Thrillseekers v.s. MNM. --- They go for the same whip double team but it backfires and Jeter is in. 2 dropkicks, elbow, spinning kick, Nitro saves Matthews from getting pinned. Matt up top and hits a double crossbody on both MNM members! Jeter takes down Matthews but gets 2.999. Jeter signals and goes up top. He kicks Nitro off the apron, who is trying to crotch him on the top rope. You never realize how much psychology is in OVW until you have to type up what happens in the matches. Jeter hits a spinning kick from the top on Matthews but Melina distracts the ref, allowing Matthews to recover. It's pretty sad when OVW's tag team division is better than WWE's. Melina grabs a chair but Skyfire throws the chair away and carries Melina to the back. Matthews and Jeter in the ring, Jeter hits an enziguri. Nitro gets Jeter now, Nitro misses with a move and flies over the top rope. The Thrill Seekers hit a double superkick on Matthews. 1-2-3! New Champs!! --- Cornette says we'll talk to the Thrillseekers NEXT! -- OVW Live in London, KY! See Mark Henry, The Thrillseekers, Elijah Burke, MNM and more! You can pick up tickets at the Optimist Club or at the *Flea Market* in London. Well, that's Kentucky for you. Dating service ad because all wrasslin fans are dateless losers! Play poker online because all wrasslin fans are suckers! Rebuild your credit because all wrasslin fans are poor and in debt up to their eyeballs since they spend their money on dating services, online gambling, and wrasslin! -- Cornette says "These (sic) are the Thrillseekers" and he is immediately tackled by the grammar police. The Thrillseekers are in the ring. Cornette says those belts look good around the Thrillseekers. Jeter says he's never been tag team champion before and has never even been in a tag team before. Jeter says the titles have belonged to a lot of great teams and he's honored to be champion. Matt says he and Jeter have known each other a long time and have been through a lot of highs and lows. Matt says the Thrillseekers are on top of their game and I feel a heel run-in coming on. Matt says a lot of people helped us get there and they are the Davis Arena fans. Matt SHOOTS and thanks the matchmaker Jim Cornette for booking them in the match last week. He thanks Skyfire for taking care of Melina. Jeter says they're going to stay on top for a long time and you can put money on it. I didn't know Vegas had a line on OVW matches. This brings out MNM (w/ entourage). Cornette says "they're trying to upstage the new OVW champions". Melina's seems to have raided Jimmy Jacobs' closet and stolen a pair of his boots. Cornette says you're missing something that used to be hanging between your legs, of course I'm talking about your Southern Tag Team Titles. Matthews says "let me tell you something BROTHER", and says even though the Thrillseekers won the belts, they're still the stars of the show, they still draw the ratings and they're still the champions of OVW. "You Still Suck Chant". Cornette says it's a challenge for a rematch. Matt mocks Matthews' mocking Hogan and says MNM hid behind a 30 day clause to stop from defending the belts. Matt says they don't have to give MNM a rematch, and they don't have to defend the titles for 30 days. Melina says "No way, you stole our belts". Both teams huddle as Cornette says if you guys want to meet with each other "I'll just sit here and play solitaire". Jeter says MNM have a shot at the titles if they beat a top rated, top contending tag team. Melina asks what tag team? Cornette says he can't lay a tag team like an egg, but he will produce a tag team next week that MNM will have to beat to get another title shot. Nitro calls Jeter/Matt cowardly for hiding behind their 30 day clause and hiding behind loopholes in their contract. He says they are only postponing the inevitable and they can't cheat MNM out of the rematch. Nitro says the fire department better come hose down the Thrillseekers after MNM get their rematch, because they're going to get burned. He leaves the Thrillseekers with a proverb, "Seek and thou shalt get thy asses kicked by MNM". Decent segment after a slow start. -- OVW live in E-Town Kentucky -- Before we see Aaron "The Idol" Stevens in action, let us take you back to last week... --- (Aaron Stevens) says he's the best looking human on the planet. Stevens says without him, Danny Inferno would be making pizza on the Boardwalk in Jersey and Trudi DeNucci would be doing things under the Boardwalk. He says Trudi is a "Jersey Shore whore" and proclaims it the year of the Idol. This brings out Danny Inferno w/ Trudi Denucci. [sNIP] Inferno says the breakup was supposed to be mutual. Inferno is mad because Stevens claimed he was the leader of the crew and says Stevens isn't even from Jersey. Inferno says a leader doesn't have someone fight their battles for them. Inferno says Stevens couldn't couldn't carry him for 15 minutes and says Inferno is for real. Inferno calls Stevens a rich kid from New England while Inferno has had to work for everything. Inferno says Trudi could whip Stevens' ass in 15 seconds. Stevens says he'd bet 15 dollars "before the operation, Trudi was a guy" which causes Trudi to slap Stevens. Stevens hits Inferno with a swinging neckbreaker and goes after Trudi and then beats up on Danny Inferno before the refs break all three up. --- Special Referee for this match is Passion. Aaron "The Idol" Stevens (w/ Jesus Christ Superstar - Andrew Lloyd Weber) v.s. Mike Taylor (w/ The Beautiful People - Marilyn Manson) Taylor backs Idol into the corner. Taylor whips Idol into the buckle... scooooop slam. Taylor does a people's elbow. Danny Inferno runs in and hits Idol with a garbage can!! Winner: Aaron "The Idol" Stevens Rating: 1/4 * (Match only lasted about 30 seconds) Inferno pulls out a chain and blisters Idol in the head. Taylor backs off and just watches in the corner. Crowd chants "Kick his Ass". Inferno produces a noose and sticks it around Idol's neck and throws him over the top rope and "hangs him"! Cornette calls for help from the back and a couple refs come out. Inferno slams Idol's head into the announce table repeatedly and then throws him over the guard rail and they brawl out the arena door. Cornette says he has "no idea what the hell is going here", but we'll be back in a minute. Wild angle by OVW standards -- Steve Lewington v.s. Blaster Lasheley (w/ "Giant Killer" Mike Mondo & Kenny "Starmaker" Bolin & "God of Thunder - Kiss" music) Lasheley actually has a challenger who's been pushed a bit, so this will be interesting. Cornette says Lewington is a step above the competition Blaster has faced thus far in OVW. This is the $100 a minute challenge. Kenny Bolin will pay Lewington $100 for each minute he can last with Blaster Mondo is paying tribute to Jimmy Hart this week with a megaphone which seems not to be working. Lewington comes agressively at Lasheley. Lasheley squashes Lewington in the corner and then clotheslines him. 30 seconds announced. Lasheley shoves Lewington and hits a European Uppercut. 45 seconds gone. Lasheley goes for a powerslam but Lewington reverses and hits a shoulderblock! Lasheley goes down for the first time ever in OVW! Lewington gets a 1 count. Hill announces 1 minute gone by. Bolin freaks out at ringside, being the ultimate cheapskate. Lewington goes up top and gets caught by Lasheley. Belly-to-belly, then a double arm underhook overhead suplex by Lasheley and Lasheley kicks the downed Lewington in the head. Lasheley goes for an elbow drop which misses. Lewington rolls out of the ring and runs around the ring area as 1:45 is announced, then 2 minutes. Cornette says Lasheley is blowing up. Lewington attacks Blaster as he enters the ring but Lasheley comes back with a clothesline and a powerslam for 3. Winner: Blaster Lasheley in 2:28 Rating: * 1/4 Bolin calls for another powerslam and this one is a running one. Bolin stuffs the $200 Lewington won into Lewington's throat. Up Next: A special guest on OVW! -- Cornette says we'll update you on Matt Morgan, but first let's show you the clip from last week! --- Matt says he's the "Blueprint" and he doesn't care what he does. Morgan demands to be fined $5000. Cornette asks him why in the hell he wants to be fined more. Morgan says deserves $2000 more for chokeslamming Cornette! He grabs Cornette by the throat and goes for the chokeslam! Elijah Burke makes the save with a steel chair and clears Morgan from the ring with a few chairshots. Cornette, once he recovers says that Morgan is "a big son of a bitch" and he's not going to be fined one red cent, but he's going to be suspended indefinitely!! Hot angle. --- We cut to a promo sent in via tape from Matt Morgan at home (thus sans mask). Morgan says Cornette is trying to keep Morgan from winning the title back, and says Cornette is trying to protect his boy Burke. Cornette knows if he lets Morgan get another shot he knows that Cornette will never be able to get the title off Morgan again. Morgan says he's got a little extra cash in his pocket since Cornette never fined him, so he's putting a $5000 bounty on Burke's head! Morgan says he's going to wreck OVW if he can't run it, and Burke will face his friend, no his Vengeance this week. --- Here's our special guest who is a new OVW trainer... it's AL SNOW! Cornette and Snow shake hands and Snow sucks up to the fans and it's "damn fine" to be in OVW with the "damn fine" fans. Snow says he begged WWE to let him come to OVW. Snow says he's going to take a real close look at Elijah Burke. Snow says he's going to take over at the announce table and take a look if Dean doesn't mind and then tells Dean to "move his ass over". Snow says "don't change the channel, don't move, we know where you live" and I hear Mick Foley fake laughing somewhere. -- Elijah Burke and slaps everyone's hands at ringside. Cornette gives the impression Snow may be taking over as commentator permanently as he says Snow is his "new broadcast partner". OVW Heavyweight Champion Elijah Burke v.s. Vengeance (n. WWE PPV) - Nontitle Match It's a hoss in a mask, Vengeance (aka Kevin Fertig aka Seven aka Mordecai). Ven is wearing a mask inspired by the comic book character Spawn, andis wearing a chest protector ala D'Lo Brown. I really couldn't tell who it was if I didn't know, so they did a good job dressing Mordecai up. Ven jumps Burke before the bell and stomps him. Burke tries to punch Vengeance in the chest and hurts his hand. Ven misses a splash in the corner, and Burke comes back. An Inverted Atomic Drop 2x, clothesline by Burke. 10-punch count in the corner. Snow says he'd do anything for $500, let alone $5000. Vengeance Vader attacks Burke in the corner. 2 count. Cornette and Snow need a little work meshing together (Snow talks a bit too much since Cornette can talk forever) but that will come quickly. Grapevine and a "fishhook" on Burke. Snow says Burke looks like a "large mouth bass" about now. Ven punches away on Burke, Burke breaks out. Ven goes for the Vader attack and misses and hurts himself with his chest protector. Burke forearm, dropkick. 1-count. Russian legsweep for 2. Cornette says the OVW title isn't on the line. Burke goes for his finisher, but Ven blocks with a thumb to the eye. Ven sticks something up his mask and headbutts Burke. 1-2-3. Winner; Vengeance. Mordecai looked better in that match. Al SNow is on the ring apron and tells Briscoe about Ven cheating. Briscoe asked the audience what happened. Briscoe decides to restart the match! Vengeance runs after Al Snow, who jumps off the apron. Burke hits the facebuster (X-Factor) on Ven, who still has the object in his mask and is knocked out cold! 1-2-3! Winner: Elijah Burke Rating: * 1/2 Snow gets in the ring and raises Burke's hand and congratulates him. Not a great show like last week but still very solid, especially the opening match.

This was pretty much going to happen at some point. Smackdown doesn't do the big numbers it used to and there's still a stigma that "wrasslin' fans" are idiots so it's hard to attract advertisers. They'll have no trouble getting SD on a cable network, but their stock is going to take a good hit when news hits Wall Street. And they probably won't be able to as good of a deal with Viacom giving them the finger. Pretty dumb move by UPN too (although Vince may have asked for way too much money), as I doubt any show they replace Smackdown with will get half the ratings in that death time slot. Always thought this was the first domino that had to drop in the "WWE goes out of business" scenario.

...they drag Antonio Thomas away from NECW, where he was getting a main event push and putting on very, VERY solid matches each event, and was the most over heel on the roster next to Michael Sain...and they give him the fag gimmick. Cornette, you can do better. Also, Fro: Don't you think Thomas looks like a more well-built Randy Orton? He reminds me a little more of Rob Conway since he's a bit shorter than Orton. Definitely has a potential WWE look. As much as I hate gay gimmicks, this one's so over the top it works, especially with the confused OVW ringrat portion of the fans cheering for them. And Morrus is a great manager for them, building them up every week talking about how much the "ladies love them" and then they come out prancing around. They're not just a comedy team either. It's a potentially bad gimmick that's been very well executed at this point. Right now, the tag teams in OVW are the main event guys, so I'd look for them to be in line to feud with The Thrillseekers very soon. I wouldn't worry about Thomas because he'll make the jump to singles and get repackaged at some point down the line.

Here's this week's results, from yours truely. OVW TV Report for 1/22/2005 by Jeff "Fro" Wahlman Email: [email protected] OVW Valley Wrestling Taped from the Davis Arena in Louisville, KY on 1/19/2005 Commentators: Jim Cornette and "Daredevil" Dean Hill Let the bodies hit the floor... let the bodies hit the floor (It's the OVW intro package with lots of shots of Doug Basham, Danny "Damaja" Basham, Nick "Eugene" Dinsmore, Nova, Kanyon, Benoit, Bob Holly, Kurt Angle, Johnny Jeter, and Matt Morgan. It's a little out of date, I think.) "The Shooter" Brent Albright v.s. Mike Taylor Nice to see Albright back after his injury. Chris Kay is ref. Taylor and Albright trade waistlocks. Taylor leapsfrogs and hits Albright with a clothesline. He follows that up with a Muta-style elbow. Albright gets dumped out of the ring but skins the cat and takes control. Albright works on the left arm, setting up for his finisher, the crowbar for a few minutes. Albright hits a nice dropkick on Taylor's arm in the corner which gets 2. Albright hits a hammerlock and then tries to ram Taylor's shoulder into the buckle again but Taylor reverses. Taylor makes the comeback with one arm and hits a nice kneelift and an Angle Slam which Cornette calls a "modified Samoan Drop" for 2. Taylor's going to have a rude awakening if he ever moves up to WWE when he can't do half his moves. Taylor hits an elbow off the 2nd rope for 2. Albright goes for the Crowbar (basically an armbar) but it gets reversed into a fireman's carry. Albright hits a wristlock and drops Taylor's arm across his shoulder. He then locks in the Crowbar. Taylor quickly taps. Fun little match and both guys looked good. Winner: Brent Albright Rating: ** 1/4 Up next, an interview with Matt Morgan. - OVW returns to the Derby Park Expo Sunday Jan. 30th at 6 p.m. OVW Fundraiser Promo - Last week, Matt Morgan got a title shot with OVW Champion Elijah Burke. The last couple minutes of last week's match are shown. We pick up with Morgan making his comeback and walking into a Black Hole Slam from Morgan for 2. Burke with a DDT for 2. Burke goes up top and drops an elbow for 2. Elijah puts a sleeper on the much bigger Morgan but Morgan knocks over the ref and drops Burke backwards (the Vader/Foley spot)! Morgan goes outside the ring and grabs the OVW Title, but Burke ducks the belt shot, grabs the title and hits an X-Factor on the belt for 3. Cornette introduces Matt Morgan for an interview. Matt has a mask that looks a bit too much like the Punisher's logo for the WWE legal team's liking. Cornette says Morgan lost his temper last week. Footage is shown after the show ended last week of Morgan beating up several referees and security members. Cornette mentions that Morgan caused several injuries and Morgan is fined $3000 for his actions, one of the biggest fines in OVW history. This causes Morgan to be quite angry. Morgan says he didn't lose his cool last week, Cornette should pay him $3000 for taking out those loser refs. Morgan says Cornette made him into a monster. Cornette mentions the angle that led to Morgan getting his mask and how Morgan is dishonest. Morgan says the OVW title belongs around his waist. Morgan says he's the only heavyweight around OVW and Chris Cage and Elijah Burke were lucky to beat him. He threatens to go after a fan. Matt says he's the "Blueprint" and he doesn't care what he does. Morgan demands to be fined $5000. Cornette asks him why in the hell he wants to be fined more. Morgan says deserves $2000 more for chokeslamming Cornette! He grabs Cornette by the throat and goes for the chokeslam! Elijah Burke makes the save with a steel chair and clears Morgan from the ring with a few chairshots. Cornette, once he recovers says that Morgan is "a big son of a bitch" and he's not going to be fined one red cent, but he's going to be suspended indefinitely!! Hot angle. -- Feb. 12, OVW in E-Town Kentucky -- Blaster Lasheley (/w "The Giant Killer" Mike Mondo and Kenny "Starmaker" Bolin) v.s. Bam Bam Pender This match is a $100 a minute challenge, where Kenny Bolin pays $100 for every minute the opponent can last with Lasheley. Mondo seems to have inherited Fonzie's whistle. Both he and Blaster are dresssed in army fatigues. Pender has an Eagles jersey on which the Louisville crowd doesn't care about. Blaster looks a little bit like and is built like a slightly taller Monty Brown. Bam Bam tries to waistlock Blaster to no effect. Blaster spears Lasheley and then slaps Bam Bam around a bit. Hill announces 45 seconds elapsed. Blaster hits a powerslam for 3 in 53 seconds. He's definitely getting a monster push but he didn't show much here. Squash. Winner: Blaster Lasheley Rating: 1/4 * Last week, Mark Henry unfortunately returned to OVW and tossed around Chad Toland. At least we'll only have to suffer through the guy another year in OVW and WWE since his ridiclous contract is close to being up. Crowd chants "midget" at Chad, which lets you know what his prospects are of getting called up even though he's worked for New Japan and is great. Chad hits the Ric Flair low blow and shoulderblocks down Henry. This was funny because Chad was dressed up like he's Ric Flair this week. Chris Cage steals Tank Toland's crutch and hits Chad! Henry splashes Chad for 3! This was supposed to be a handicap match but Tank Toland never tagged in, selling his "injury" he got from Chris Cage punching him about 6 weeks ago. Cornette says the Tolands have run this charade with Tank faking being injured for too long. Cornette says the Tolands have contacted a Louisville attorney and have filed a lawsuit against OVW for an unsafe working environment. Due to the legal case, both the Tolands and Chris Cage will be off OVW until the case is resolved. Up next, Aaron "The Idol" Stevens. -- OVW in London, KY Feb 19 -- Aaron Stevens, former member of the Jersey Shore Crew with Nova and Danny Inferno, is out for a promo. Stevens has a new Ric Flair robe to complete his repacking. Stevens says he is "Free At Last" and for 15 months he worried about a bunch of dirtballs and carried them on his back. Now he's looking out for himself. He's not a dirtball. He says he's the best looking human on the planet. Stevens says without him, Danny Inferno would be making pizza on the Boardwalk in Jersey and Trudi DeNucci would be doing things under the Boardwalk. He says Trudi is a "Jersey Shore whore" and proclaims it the year of the Idol. This brings out Danny Inferno w/ Trudi Denucci. Inferno says the breakup was supposed to be mutual. Inferno is mad because Stevens claimed he was the leader of the crew and says Stevens isn't even from Jersey. Inferno says a leader doesn't have someone fight their battles for them. Inferno says Stevens couldn't couldn't carry him for 15 minutes and says Inferno is for real. Inferno calls Stevens a rich kid from New England while Inferno has had to work for everything. Inferno says Trudi could whip Stevens' ass in 15 seconds. Stevens says "before the operation, Trudi was a guy" which causes Trudi to slap Stevens. Stevens hits Inferno with a swinging neckbreaker and goes after Trudi and then beats up on Danny Inferno before the refs break all three up. Another good segment, with both Stevens and Inferno showing much better than expected promo ability. -- Next week, the "Beat the Champ TV Title" debuts. Apparently there will be a TV Title awarded in a match with two randomly drawn members of the OVW roster. For every successful defense each week against a random opponent, the champ will win $1000. If he loses the belt, the challenger wins $1000. -- Mo Greene is in the ring. He was formerly known as Lamont in WWE (The Cat's sidekick) and Morrus in OVW and rumors of his demise have been greatly exaggerated. He's dressed up like he's mini-Godfather down to the cane and hat.. He introduces his tag team, the Heartbreakers. The Heartbreakers are sort of a Christopher Street Connection type gimmick,down to running out and coming out to "It's Raining Men" with red boas and pink headbands. They actually get on on the announce table and start grinding on Cornette and Dean Hill and throwing confetti on them which is hilarious for the announcers' reactions. Hill says "Just Say No to Crack" and COrnette says "I've been stuck blind for life". Cornette actually says "they're trying to sexually assault Chris Kay". The confused women in the crowd actually pop. "The Heartbreakers" Romeo Rosallei (sp?) & "The Promise" Antonio Thomas v.s. Steve Lewington & Ken Donne Lewington and Thomas start, Thomas grabs a handful Lewington's buttocks after a lockup. We can tell Lewington is British because he wears British Flag Tights. Lewington then kicks him after an exchange. Donne comes in off the top with a big sledge. Donne is only 18 and is built like Randy Orton. Donne hits an armdrag into an armbar. Romeo in now and Lewington as well. Atomic drop and the Heartbreakers hit each other. Mo trips Lewington and Romeo clips Lewington's knee. Romeo and Thomas wishbone him. They work on Lewington's knee. Cornette says the Heartbreakers are of "questionable sexual orientation". Romeo back in, ducks an enziguri but Lewington kicks Romeo off and Donne is in. Donne is a house of fire with elbows and a split-legged moonsault!! This only gets two. Dropkick where Donne gets about 6 feet in the air. Donne hits his finisher, but Greene runs interference. The Heartbreakers hit their finisher, now called "erectile dysfunction" which is a Double Rock Bottom with a double leg trip for a 3 count. Crowd chants "you're still gay"! at them. Winners: The Heartbreakers Rating: * 1/2 Up Next: The OVW Southern Tag Titles are on the line -- MNM (the OVW Southern Tag Team Champions) come out with their awesome entrance. Their entrance is pretty great, with a bunch of photographers coming out and snapping photos and a couple entourage guys holding signs. Matthews and Nitro have the title belts attached to belts around their waist, so they're dangling between their legs, which is probably all you need to know about that. Matthews dangles his "title belt" near a photographer's mouth again this week. Matthews fake reels Melina in the ring who does the splits as she goes under the bottom rope, then she stands up and Nitro slides into the ring ala Edge but face up under her. As people have said, pretty risque for OVW. They make some crotch chops to their belts. Cornette grabs the microphone and says Seth Skyfire and Mac Johnson were supposed to get a rematch this week. Cornette says Mac Johnson was injured last week due to the actions of Matthews and Nitro and will be out 4-6 weeks with an abdominal injury. Cornette says those two can't wrestle this week. Cornette says "that belt's the longest thing you have down there". Cornette says he has a replacement tag team that will be out in about five seconds. "MNM" Johnny Nitro and Joey Matthews (w/ Melina) v.s. "The Thrillseekers" Johnny Jeter and Matt Capotelli Faces hit the ring immediately and clear the ring. The Thrillseekers pose with the belts and with MNM's coats as Dean Hill finally introduce them. Robert Brisko is the ref. Says Melina is wearing a "handkerchief and a hair tie" for a skirt and top. MNM beats up one of their photographers for taking pictures of Jeter and Matt. Jeter and Capotelli come out and strart brawling outside the ring with MNM. Jeter and Nitro start as the bell finally rings. Jeter hits a flying formarm and goes for the Jericho springboard dropkcick spot which he blows totally after slipping on the 2nd rope. Double kick, double boot, double punch. Matt and Joey in. Matt fights out of the heel corner and hits a neckbreaker and then a swinging neckbreaker on Matthews. He hits a flapjack when Nitro runs in, throwing him on Matthews! Capotelli goes up top and gets crotched when Nitro trips him. Matthews destracts the ref while Nitro chokes him on the ring apron. Matthews hits a low blow. Matthews goes for the cover for two as we hit the ad break. -- OVW in London Kentucky and Derby Park Expo! -- Matt is trapped in the ropes when we come back. Matthews and Nitro double -team Matt. Nitro gets in Matt's face and chokes him. Stomp, punch in and shoulders in the corner. Matthews back in and revs back and runs into the corner with a shoulder to the gut. This causes Matt to get bounced outside the ring and Melina stomps away on him. 2-count when Matt is rolled back into the ring. Both MNM members kick Matt in the gut as Nitro is back in and ties Matt in the ropes again! They go for the same whip double team but it backfires and Jeter is in. 2 dropkicks, elbow, spinning kick, Nitro saves Matthews from getting pinned. Matt up top and hits a double crossbody on both MNM members! Jeter takes down Matthews but gets 2.999. Jeter signals and goes up top. He kicks Nitro off the apron, who is trying to crotch him on the top rope. You never realize how much psychology is in OVW until you have to type up what happens in the matches. Jeter hits a spinning kick from the top on Matthews but Melina distracts the ref, allowing Matthews to recover. It's pretty sad when OVW's tag team division is better than WWE's. Melina grabs a chair but Skyfire throws the chair away and carries Melina to the back. Matthews and Jeter in the ring, Jeter hits an enziguri. Nitro gets Jeter now, Nitro misses with a move and flies over the top rope. The Thrill Seekers hit a double superkick on Matthews. 1-2-3! New Champs. Good match! Winners: The Thrillseekers (new OVW Southern Tag Team Champions) Rating: *** 1/4 Crowd gives Jeter and Capotelli a standing ovation. Cornette says a new era in OVW Tag Team wrestling has begun. The ref raises their hands and the Thrillseekers go into the crowd with the titles as the show fades out. Not a really great show this week but definitely better than average and fun to watch.

I'm guessing you haven't watched many PPV's. I'd recommend Every WWF PPV from January-May 2000 as great shows and all around fun to watch. I didn't order it (no PPV box), but I watched what I could and listened via scramblevision and it came off like a really great PPV. I'd say the stars Slapnuts is throwing around are about right, and a lot of the questionable matches really delivered (Dustin v.s. Kash was a fantastic selljob by Dustin).

Both AMW/Team Canada and Ultimate X were just fantastic. This PPV is an easy thumbs up.