River City Rocker

I was also born there in 1976. My family had moved away for good by 1982 (my dad's job usually transferred him all over the place), but I still have plenty of relatives in the Pontiac area. I'd love to move back someday... -Ben

I would say go for it, and that you may never get another chance like this. But here's my story, just like everyone else. I went to Columbia College in downtown Chicago for five years (1995-2000). My parents paid for each and every semester. They didn't have too much say in it, as I made a last minute decision to go to college sometime during senior year in high school, after a long period where I honestly believed that I wouldn't even finish high school (for social problems, not academic ones). I majored in communications, specifically, radio/sound. Well, one major thing happened when I was in school: the rise of Clear Channel. Let's just say that with ownership regulations severely relaxed, getting into radio went from pretty hard in 1995 to basically not even worth trying anymore by the time I graduated five years later. But I was too proud to consider a minor in anything, it was radio. I wouldn't even consider not being able to get in. But personally, college wasn't as exciting as most people make it out to be. I started to sour on spending three long days downtown every week, and I hated the commuting. Basically, from 1997 on, I had days where I looked forward to getting out of class and going home to unwind. I also didn't have too many friends, either. When I finally graduated, my first thought was literally "Well, what do I do now?" So, three years later, I'm living in southern Indiana with my parents, and still working in the same occupation I was doing when I first started college: retail clerk. Out of 200 audition tapes mailed to radio stations, I have just eight rejection letters to show for it. I'll just end this by saying that while I have a degree, I still need to find work in another field, since I've basically given up... -Ben

A long, long, long time ago, I was at home watching MTV one Saturday night. In the space of a few hours, I saw one of the most ridiculous double standards for censorship that I've ever seen. The first case was "Dre Day" by Dr. Dre with Snoop Dogg. During part of the video, Dre holds up a pistol in full view of the camera. MTV literally whited out part of the screen so that no one saw that gun. Later on, they aired Queensryche's "Eyes of a Stranger". One scene involved one character giving a gun to another person. And they didn't censor it. I know MTV has gazillions of things wrong with it, but shouldn't they at least have the same standards for censoring firearms from all of their videos? So a prog-metal band can depict a man with a gun in their video, but the gangsta rapper can't? -Ben (this happened about ten years ago, but it still bothers me)

Anyone else around here have one? Mine's right here. You can't see much since everything is protected. -Ben

4 Non Blondes Aerosmith Black Sabbath Cheap Trick Donnas, The Everclear Fuel Georgia Satellites Humble Pie Iron Maiden Judas Priest Kittie Led Zeppelin Montrose New York Dolls, The Oleander Petty, Tom Queensryche Replacements, The Smashing Pumpkins Tesla Urge Overkill Van Halen Who, The XTC Yardbirds, The Zappa, Frank

I just picked up Rhino's The Best of Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In this week. Six episodes, three bonus interviews. It's almost worth every penny to see Richard M. Nixon's cameo in one of the episodes included. "Sock it to me?" -Ben

This is something I've been wondering myself. I always thought it was possible to have more than just eighteen CAWs saved. And I was never crazy about the idea of putting four different wrestlers in the same CAW slot. Now to hunt around for a 4X memory card... -Ben

I live in Evansville, Indiana. I've heard enough about the IU-Purdue rivalry. I've also heard plenty about the IU-U of Kentucky revival as well. Since Evansville is technically the capital of "North Kentucky", it's totally understandable. But I suppose in a few years, the biggest sports villian in Indiana will be the owner of the Colts, if he decides to move them to Los Angeles... -Ben

"Wallie, Wallie" is a classic, too, where his daughters catch him taking a piss ("doing God's work" as Cosby described it) after a shower and they see that he's not built like they are. Later, he finds them trying to "get their wallie wallies to come out" in another bathroom. I bought a two-disc collection from Bill Cosby from Borders last month. It's an import compilation of two of his 70s albums on Capitol, My Father Confused Me and Bill's Best Friend. While it's always cool to hear Bill Cosby material that I've never heard before, this isn't as funny as his 60s albums. And some of the bits on the albums were later revised and used in the movie Bill Cosby: Himself. You also can't go wrong with Universal's The Best of Bill Cosby: The Millennium Collection. I think Cosby's the only comedian who got a compilation like that. I've been really getting into Bob Newhart lately. And I've always loved Bill Hicks and George Carlin. I've also been considering picking up some Richard Pryor, since Rhino's released a two-disc "greatest hits" package a while back. -Ben

Don't even get me started on "your" versus "you're". It still drives me crazy. This happened to me once in school. Student writes "Ben your gay" on desk. Me: My gay what? Idiot: Huh? Me: You wrote "your gay". You're implying one of my belongings is gay. Now, what is it? Idiot: You're retarded! Second Idiot: Let's just beat him up after school. In the fifth grade, my teacher got annoyed at most of his class pronouncing our like are. You know, "Are dog got run over by a steamroller yesterday!" He even stopped a class for fifteen minutes to address this situation. The offending students took his advice for about a day, then went back to saying thinks like "Are car got traded in for a new van!" -Ben

Anal Cunt song titles are hysterical. For whatever reason, "I'm Hitler" makes me laugh pretty hard. But the music's pretty unlistenable, in my opinion. -Ben

The more things change.... Heh! I saw that. You could tell that statement was a lie. I've always wondered, if someone went to Sean's forum, and registered under the name "Hyatte Fan" or something like it, how long until they got banned? What do you think, before they even make one post? Better yet, register under the name Steve Corino and post "Hey bitch, are you ever gonna wrestle me?! I'm still waiting!!" -Ben

Visit seanshannon.org to see what "Little Miss Rebel" is up to. -Ben

That one I remember. The last caller was Chicago radio personality Mancow Muller, who basically used his time to rip into Jerry Lawler and challenge him to a charity softball game. "What do they call your team, King? Lawler's Losers or something?!" I think the WWF won that game. I also vaguely remember the "Bruce from Connecticut" call on Livewire. -Ben

Well, color me disgusted at that. WHY would anyone do that to themselves just to be "different"?! And I used to remember that if you wanted to be "different", all you had to do was wear different clothes, or have a different hairstyle than most people. Anyone who split their tongue was usually locked up and fast! -Ben

It's like a really bad car wreck, I felt. I couldn't turn away even if I wanted to. Regardless, this will end badly. I can't see it ending any other way... -Ben

And I've heard my dad say this whenever he sees someone like Aerosmith, Ozzy Osbourne, Iggy Pop, or whichever rock star who was famous for doing massive amounts of drugs during their heyday: "These guys are still ALIVE?!" Yeah, not really a moronic statement, but still funny nonetheless. It's like all three ceased to exist when Dad got old enough to turn it to the adult contemporary or oldies stations full time. And then there are people who believe G.G. Allin was/is just an urban legend. Reportedly, even Rolling Stone took that stance a long time ago... -Ben

The 9/13 live Smackdown. As if live wrestling was that crucial to the American way of life that it had to "help" people get back on their usual routines just two days after a major terrorist attack. And within the same program, Stephanie McMahon comparing flying hijacked planes into fully occupied buildings to her father's steroid trial. -Ben

I used to work with a girl who swore that Oasis was the greatest band ever. Eh, yeah. Sure. She wasn't familiar at all with the Beatles, the ones that Oasis takes great pains to imitate. This isn't musical, but I know people who think Denis Leary is a genius, and they've either never heard of Bill Hicks, or they won't believe that Leary ripped off Hicks right down to his stage mannerisms. A friend of mine once told me that he worked with a teenage girl who heard "Every Breath You Take" by the Police during one shift. She turned up her nose in disgust and actually said "I can't believe this lame band remade that awesome Puff Daddy song!" -Ben

I've seen Dead Alive and Time Bandits on DVD. Time Bandits, if I'm correct, has been released by both Anchor Bay and Criterion. I own the Anchor Bay release, but I haven't watched it in over a year. -Ben

Am I the only one who's noticed that Sound of White Noise has been banished to the cut-out bins at most music stores, marked down to less than $6.99? Granted, it's a great record, but unless it was a colossal flop in sales, I don't really see why I'm finding quite a few copies at flea markets, Big Lots, or occasionally, on the countertop of any convenience store right next to endless country compilations and Cheap Trick's Woke Up With a Monster. Getting back on the main topic, I still haven't heard much of St. Anger aside from hearing the title track once this week. To be fair, I'll give it a few more listens before I decide if I think it's good or not. -Ben

WHY is ESPN showing a spelling bee right now?! When did spelling words become a sport? -Ben

Hopefully mine is okay. If not, I can just find something else to use that won't take up as much space. -Ben

November to Remember '97: Tag title four-way dance: Tommy Rich tried sneaking up on New Jack, and Rich wasn't making any effort to hide the blade in his hand (his right hand was clenched, and it didn't look "natural"). New Jack belts him with the guitar, Rich swipes his head to sell, and he starts bleeding...while still holding the blade in his right hand. -Ben

Indeed they did, JHawk. And as a player and judge of the game, I wish they would again. Even just a few of the bigger events each year would bring a lot of exposure to the game. They always showed it at like 2:00 AM, so it's not like it took the place of an important piece of real sports programming. Btw, I think watching poker and chess on ESPN/2 is *fascinating*. Heh. I bet the Magic players were more athletic than most Green Bay Packers fans. -Ben