SamoaRowe

::marks out for Home Movies on DVD::

Aww, I have dvds with those last three matches on them... grr... but the others sound great, so I'll probably still buy it.

No Eddie vs Dean matches? That's quite a shock.

As long as they leave EWR diaries alone and such, no problems here. My favorite e-feds were always the ones featuring entirely original characters.

I fucking laugh out loud at that 9.95 fee. I'll stick with my EWR, thank you very much.

Smackdown! October 5th, 2006 Michael Cole and Tazz welcome us to another exciting edition of Smackdown! They mention that Rhyno decided to take the week off, and is on a fishing trip with Reno. They hype up a contract signing between Orlando Jordan and Nunzio for later on in the show, but the first match is ready to go. Team Basham vs Team Palumbo Match Background: Team Basham consists of Doug Basham, Danny Basham, Nova, and Jimmy Rave. Team Palumbo consists of Bill DeMott, Chuck Palumbo, Ken Shamrock, and Simon Diamond. Basham Brothers are the reigning WWF Tag Team champions, and have been since 20 August 2006. The Match: Danny slams Bill DeMott. Bill DeMott charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Tag to Jimmy Rave. STIFF high kick on DeMott by Jimmy Rave. Tag between Bill DeMott and Ken Shamrock. Shamrock walks into a high dropkick from Jimmy Rave, almost losing several teeth in the process. Tag to Nova. Jimmy Rave and Nova hook up Shamrock, then hit a double suplex. Spinning bulldog in the corner and Shamrock is down! There's a two count on the pin. Tag between Nova and Doug Basham. Ken Shamrock charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Shamrock walks into a side slam. Think about how much talent it takes to side slam someone. Nash can do it. Basham tags out to Danny Basham. Danny Basham scores with a standing spinebuster. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Danny drops an elbow...but Ken Shamrock moves out of the way. Tag to Chuck Palumbo. Bodyslam by Palumbo. Spear by Chuck Palumbo. Covers for a quick two count. Tag to Simon Diamond. Palumbo \ Diamond whip Danny into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Hooks the leg for a two count. Wicked suplex out of the corner from Simon Diamond, is executed so well, it hurt MY back. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Rave blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Rave uses a basement dropkick to the knee and it looks like it might be TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL~! Tag between Jimmy Rave and Doug Basham. Spear by Doug Basham. Basham charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Tag to Chuck Palumbo. Diamond \ Palumbo whip Basham into the corner. Simon Diamond whips Chuck Palumbo in for a hard clothesline to follow-up. Powerbomb on Basham. Basham scores with a forearm, sending Palumbo down into the corner. The referee pulls Doug Basham away to get the break. Wait! Palumbo has pulled something out of his tights. Doug Basham walks over...and gets floored by a punch! 1....2....3! The referee never saw the brass knuckles! My Opinion: Smack dab in the middle of the star spectrum for an average match. **1\2. Cole: Chuck Palumbo just stole a victory! Tazz: The Bashams must have still been sporting sores from the beat-down they got from Rhyno and Rodney Mack last week! Cole: A tainted victory for SARS, but I don’t think they give a damn. Winners at 8:11: Chuck Palumbo, Bill DeMott, Ken Shamrock, and Simon Diamond. The GM is in the house. After the commercial break, we come back to find Mike Sanders in the ring. He has a piece of paper in front of him, which Michael Cole speculates to be a list. Sanders: It isn’t easy being General Manager of Smackdown! I have been given a lot to worry about and many things to take care of. There are a few things that are on my mind in particular these days. First off, J.R. Ryder did not return to Smackdown after Unforgiven. I made the decision to fire him, but then had second thoughts. However, his Unforgiven tag team match was changed at the last minute to a match for the World Tag Team Championship, which he ended up winning. A Smackdown superstar holding a Raw title is most disgusting to me. I had some intense conferences with Shawn Michaels t his week and we came to an agreement regarding Ryder. As long as he holds that tag title on Raw, he can stay. However, once he loses that title, he must immediately return to Smackdown or he will be fired from the WWF completely! This generates a mixed reaction from the crowd. Sanders: Another hard part about being GM of Smackdown is the responsibility I have to ensure the quality of this program. Every Smackdown must be exciting, week to week. However, on October 22nd, I will be facing a new challenge. I will be overseeing No Mercy, the first Smackdown Pay-Per-View in the Mike Sanders era. I’ll be damned if No Mercy isn’t the most exciting Pay-Per-View any of you moronic fans have ever seen. This is why I want something different. No Mercy is going to be filled with exciting matches showcasing wrestlers who hate each other. However, I want something a bit different on that card as well. I want to see two gladiators go at it with no prior contact or hatred of each other. I want these two men to spend the next three weeks knowing that they are going to fight, but they cannot do anything about it until the big night. At No Mercy, we’re going to see the new and improved Sean O’Haire battle Johnny Stamboli! (Pop from the crowd). The gimmick with this match is that if they so much as enter the same room as one another before No Mercy, they will both be suspended! Bear with me, people, this is an experiment I’ve long wanted to try. Cole: That’s going to be a hell of a match! Tazz: No kidding, and they aren’t even allowed to interact until No Mercy! We aren’t going to have any idea of what to expect! Sanders: Last, but not least, I have found myself respecting Don Callis more and more as weeks go by. He is a fine man, who represents two very fine wrestlers in AJ Styles and Low-Ki. Any enemy of his is an enemy of mine. With this in mind, I want to prepare Sean O’Haire for No Mercy by putting him against the man everyone in this company hates the most, Paul London! That is your main event folks, I hope you enjoy watching London be destroyed by the monster O’Haire. Cole: What a main event for tonight! Tazz: This is why I love it when Sanders comes to the ring! He always gives us a lot to be excited about! Cole: I don’t know about that, Tazz! It seems that he’s giving Don Callis special favors, that’s not fair for the rest of the roster! Low Ki and AJ Styles vs Alex Arion and Sonjay Dutt Match Background: Low-Ki assaulted Alex Arion last week, stating that he wasn’t worthy of the title shots he had been receiving. The Match: Low Ki hits some punches. How generic. Big dropkick by Low Ki, who got a ton of air on the move. Hooks the leg for a two count. Tag to AJ Styles. Low Ki \ Styles whip Arion into the ropes and hit a double back elbow. Covers for a quick two count. Second rope flying axe handle, Arion goes down. One day, Styles might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Arion blocks a punch. Arion crushes Styles with a running senton. There's a two count on the pin. Tag to Sonjay Dutt. Flying reverse elbow by Sonjay Dutt. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Sonjay Dutt hits a rolling kick on Styles. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. AJ Styles reverses a hip toss. Second rope flying axe handle, Dutt goes down. One day, Styles might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Tag between AJ Styles and Low Ki. Back suplex on Dutt. Dutt tags out to Alex Arion. Hard impact Russian Leg Sweep by Low Ki. According to some other reviewers around here, 'legsweep' is one word. Rodney Mack comes running down the aisle with a chair! Low Ki whips Alex Arion into the ropes. Mack jumps onto the apron with the chair! Collision between Mack, Arion, and the chair! Alex Arion staggers back into a roll up! 1...2...3! It's over! Arion \ Dutt are beaten down three-on-two by the combined forces of Low Ki, Styles and Mack. My Opinion: I'll give this a ***1\4 rating. If I left it up to you, you'd probably think it was the greatest match ever! Keep trying... Tazz: Geez, no one seems to want to give Arion a break these days! Cole: This is disgusting, ever since Arion was chosen as Rhyno’s opponent last month, he’s been a marked man! Tazz: Rodney Mack also helped out Don Callis’s men again. The union is in full effect. Winners at 7:34: AJ Styles and Low-Ki In the back. Josh Matthews is standing by with Paul London and Chad Collyer. Josh: Paul, how do you feel about your match tonight with Sean O’Haire? London: I’ll be honest, I’m a bit nervous just because I don’t know what to expect. I’ve noticed that O’Haire has been abducting cruiserweights, and taking orders from Trent Acid. The whole thing is very strange, one minute O’Haire is destroying everyone around him and the next minute he’s as helpless as an infant. Either way, tonight Sean O’Haire is going to fall to my London Calling. Josh: And Chad, how do you feel about Rhyno not being here tonight? Collyer: For starters, the mental image of Rhyno and Reno fishing together just cracks me up. Secondly, it's just another fine act of professionalism from our beloved WWF Champion. When I was WWF Champion, I was very proud of that and made sure I was here each and every week, at least for the sake of the fans. Rhyno just doesn't care. That's okay though, because this dark age of having a champion no-show events for fishing and defending his title once a month is going to end at No Mercy. I will make Rhyno scream "I quit" and then I will go on and become the WWF Champion that I wanted to be the first two times. I want to prove that my name belongs on that great list of former champions. Frankie Kazarian vs Scoot Andrews Match Background: Last week, Scoot Andrews helped cost Kazarian the Cruiserweight title to Jamie Noble. Before that, Andrews was abducted by Sean O’Haire and Trent Acid and resurfaced as their ally. No one is sure what happened to O’Haire’s first victim, Ultimo Dragon. The Match: Scoot walks into a high dropkick from Frankie Kazarian, almost losing several teeth in the process. Spinning back kick from Frankie Kazarian. Scoot takes a flying neckbreaker from Frankie Kazarian. Implant DDT by Frankie Kazarian! I will always and forever mark out for that move. Scoot blocks a punch. Spin kick by Scoot Andrews to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. Springboard reverse elbow by Scoot Andrews. Excellent move. Looks like Muta has giving out lessons. Hooks the leg for a two count. Frankie Kazarian powers out of a Scoot Andrews headlock. Flying reverse elbow by Frankie Kazarian. There's a two count on the pin. Tor-NADO DDT from Frankie Kazarian, Scoot got planted! Pin, but Scoot is out just before the three count. Scoot ducks a wild right hand. Scoot Andrews strikes Kazarian. Kazarian counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! Second rope flying axe handle, Scoot goes down. One day, Kazarian might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Scoot Andrews can barely stand. Wave Of The Future! 1....2....3. Trent Acid comes running down the aisle, and gets into the ring! Frankie Kazarian is ready though, and strikes first! Frankie Kazarian spins Acid around. Frankie Kazarian hits the Wave Of The Future! Trent Acid has been left down on the canvas. The attempted ambush has backfired. My Opinion: A **** rating is well deserved for the competitors in this match. Cole: It looked like Acid was ready for more, but Kazarian beat him to the punch! Kazarian, not willing to take any chances, makes his exit through the crowd, hoping to avoid any potential attacks by O’Haire or Jamie Noble. Tazz: Look at Kazarian, running off like a coward! Cole: That’s probably the smartest thing for him to do right now! Thanks to Trent Acid and Sean O’Haire, the back-stage area has become a most dangerous place to be! Winner at 10:10: Frankie Kazarian To wrestle or not to wrestle? We come back from the break, and there is a table set up with a contract. Orlando Jordan’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring. Jordan: Okay, Nunzio, this is it. No more games! Tonight you either agree to face me in a singles match, or we sign a contract for No Mercy! The FBI theme plays, and Nunzio and Tracy Smothers enter the arena. Nunzio: I would love to wrestle you tonight, buddy. However, I’m afraid I spent the weekend in Puerto Rico, and well, to make a long story short, I probably spent too much time entertaining the local women there. I’m exhausted! Smothers: You mean the hookers? Nunzio: NO! They weren’t hookers… or I don’t think they were… um… NEVER MIND! The point is that I’m too tired to wrestle this week. Jordan: That is the worst excuse I’ve ever heard. Nunzio: Shut up, this is embarrassing for me! I’ll sign for No Mercy. (Signs his name). Jordan: Well, that’s better than nothing. (Leans over and signs his name). Nunzio: Well, now it’s time to brawl. Jordan: Huh? Nunzio: You know, these contract signing sessions always end with a brawl. Shall I start? Jordan: Argh, I’m sick of these games! Nunzio and Smothers then both rush Jordan into the corner turnbuckle, with Smothers jumping over the table to get to him. Jordan is able to block himself enough to elbow his way out. He throws Smothers over the top rope, leaving him and Nunzio alone in the ring. Nunzio gets on his knees praying for Jordan to not hurt him, but it’s no good. Jordan lifts Nunzio unto the table and pile-drives him onto it! Cole! Oh my God! I think Jordan just killed Nunzio! Tazz: They just signed for No Mercy, but now I’m wondering if Nunzio will even make it there! Jordan stares down at Nunzio’s lifeless body, and leaves. Smothers runs in to check on his friend’s condition. Haas and Benjamin vs Funaki and Johnny Stamboli (with Erik Watts) Match Background: Haas and Benjamin are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. This match is in response to Shelton Benjamin being upset that Funaki pinned him in a match a few weeks back. Since Taka Michinoku wasn’t available for the show, Johnny Stamboli kept his reputation as a hired hand up and stepped in for Taka. The Match: A Gut buster connects on Stamboli and hits hard. Gutwrench into a stomach breaker. Stamboli may be winded. Hooks the leg for a two count. Shelton tags out to Charlie Haas. Haas and Benjamin hook up Stamboli, then hit a double suplex. Spin kick by Charlie Haas to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. Hooks the leg for a two count. Stamboli walks into a high dropkick from Charlie Haas, almost losing several teeth in the process. Johnny Stamboli fights out of a grapple. Massive lariat by Stamboli with some POWER behind it. Stamboli tags out to Funaki. Haas takes a flying neckbreaker from Funaki. Superkick by Funaki practically knocks out all of Charlie Haas's teeth! Charlie Haas is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Tag to Shelton Benjamin. T-Bone suplex by Shelton, Funaki got folded in half to the point that he was almost able to fellate himself. Mighty impressive, don't you think? Blind lariat by Shelton was downright NASTY! Funaki never...saw...it coming! Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Funaki just WALKS into a stiff lariat clothesline from Shelton. Funaki ducks a wild right hand. GORGEOUS Spinning bulldog in the corner and Shelton is down. Shelton Benjamin gets whipped into the turnbuckles by Funaki. Tornado DDT!!! 1....2....3!! It's all over. Haas and Shelton remain in the ring, arguing. Shelton Benjamin looks really angry. Charlie Haas pushes Shelton away and walks off, looking furious. My Opinion: As close to a ***** match as possible...but unfortunately, it was missing something, so I can only give it ****3/4. Cole: What an awesome, awesome display! Stamboli was dominant, I cannot wait to see him face Sean O’Haire! Tazz: And Funaki beat Benjamin again! Looks like there is some tension between Benjamin and Haas. Winners at 16:22: Johnny Stamboli and Funaki Don Callis: Motivational Speaker AJ Styles and Low-Ki are standing side by side, with Don Callis looking at them like a drill sergeant would look at his soldiers. Callis: Gentlemen, you are the two greatest wrestlers alive today. AJ, you are the true total package of professional wrestling. You can fly with the best of them, and you can out wrestle the best of them. You are a true phenomenon. You deserve to be the top man on Smackdown, not Paul London. You have every right to want and take your spot back. Tonight, London is wrestling in the main event, you wrestled in the first hour. At No Mercy, put him in his place. Styles: It will be done. I will not fail myself, or you, again. Callis: And Low-Ki. Never in my life have I met a man with more honor. You are the most honorable man I know, and if I were half the man you are, I’d be lucky. You deserve to be in contention for the United States title. Not Alex Arion. You were right to start a fight with him. I spoke to Mike Sanders after your match tonight, and he agreed to another match at No Mercy. You will challenge for the U.S. title in a triple-threat match, against the champion, Rodney Mack, and Alex Arion. At No Mercy, you will be able to win your belt, and at the same time send Alex Arion back to where he belongs: in dark matches. Low-Ki: It will be my greatest honor. Callis: Good, good. Well, my friends, it looks as if we have NOTHING to be worried about. Paul London vs Sean O'Haire Match Background: Mike Sanders made this match to soften London up for AJ Styles. Sean O’Haire has been acting as if he’s been possessed by a demon the past few weeks, and has been acting incredibly strange. The Match: O'Haire scoops and slams Paul London. What's the difference between a scoop slam and a body slam anyway? London is a glutton for punishment and just continues to take it during this match. Sean O'Haire with a spinning neckbreaker on London. Paul London charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Paul London reverses a hip toss. O'Haire takes a flying neckbreaker from Paul London. O'Haire takes a NICE hurrancarana from Paul London. Hooks the leg for a two count. O'Haire blocks a punch. Spear by Sean O'Haire. There's a two count on the pin. High Angle DDT by Sean O'Haire just SPIKES Paul London down! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! London blocks a punch. Dropkick connects to the BUTT of the jaw and O'Haire goes down. O'Haire blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Running knee lift from Sean O'Haire. AJ Styles comes running down the aisle and into the ring! Paul London turns around. AJ Styles spins London around. AJ Styles hits the Styles Clash! Styles leaves the ring, the damage done! The ref gets into position, administers the three count, and it's over. Sean O'Haire pins London. AJ Styles obviously hasn't finished his attack yet! Paul London stands up. AJ Styles spins London around. AJ Styles hits the Styles Clash! AJ Styles eventually leaves, having caused enough damage. My Opinion: All it gets is a ***1\2 rating from me. Deal with it. Cole: Damn it! Sander’s plan worked, London was left totally vulnerable for an attack by AJ Styles! Chad Collyer comes running out to save London, but Styles slides out of the ring. Collyer and Styles glare at each other (not forgetting that Collyer beat Styles for the WWF Championship at WrestleMania earlier that year). Tazz: Well, Mike Sanders had a most successful night I must say. Cole: And I find it sickening. Tazz: Get used to it, Cole. The Sanders era is here and I don’t see it ending any time soon! Winner at 7:55: Sean O'Haire

Well, some Smackdown house shows this summer drew less than 1,000. Things still aren't to the badness levels of Diesel, but then again, I'm not counting on JBL reigning for an entire year. I still say Vince McMahon is the worst champ ever. JBL is entertaining enough, but it was still a bad idea to take the belt off of Guerrero.

I wouldn't pay 750 bucks to see Orton vs HHH or Angle vs Undertaker... ... maybe if I was rich I would... ... but I'm not, and I live in New England, so chances are I'll watch it at someone's house.

Update! We need to see what happens next in the Triple H vs Mikey Whipwreck sage

Hehe, thanks for the faith. At least in my game's world, Randy Orton is unable to win the World title from Benoit

WWF Raw October 2nd, 2006 The show begins, but in the place of pyro is the theme song to Evolution! World Champion Chris Benoit, Adam Hastey, and Austin Lee make their way to the ring. All three of them are grinning, even Hastey and Lee, who had lost their tag titles at Unforgiven. Mike Tenay and The Coach welcome us to Raw and apologize for not being on the air the previous week. Evolution continues. Benoit: You know, ever since Unforgiven, I have had many people come up to me with just one question. They say “Chris Benoit, why did you turn on Triple H at Unforgiven! Why!” I think the answer is simple. Triple H was a great wrestler, he is a legend in our business, and he was a skillful leader of Evolution, who kept this group going for over three years! Despite all of this, Triple H was untrustworthy. I am the World’s Heavyweight Champion, why should I be taking orders from someone else? Likewise, it was only a matter of time before he decided that I’d reigned long enough and that I should allow him to take this title away from me. Triple H was known as the “cerebral assassin” and I would be stupid to overlook that. Hastey: Damn right! Now that we don’t have Triple H here to overshadow us anymore, we can continue! Evolution passed by Triple H and now we are in prime condition to dominate Raw for years to come! The music of HBK plays, the trio becomes disgusted as Shawn Michaels appears on stage, with a microphone. HBK: Yeah, you guys think you are so smart! Triple H has now been forced to leave the WWF because of your betrayal. The funniest part about all of this is that you three interfered in a match that I made to try and end outside interference as a whole on Raw. Randy Orton and Triple H were being made an example of, one of them was going to leave, yet you ignored that and interfered anyway. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, this is intolerable. In all fairness, I should fire all three of you… but I won’t. I’m going to book all three of you in singles matches tonight. Two out of the three of you must win your match. If not, Evolution will be forced to break up and the three of you will be forbidden to work as a trio ever again. Benoit: Hah, that would scare us but unfortunately for you, Michaels, Evolution has a way of winning matches. HBK: Oh yeah, I imagine. If any of you interfere in each other’s match, all three of you will be fired on the spot and you, Chris Benoit, will be stripped of the World Heavyweight Champion personally by me! Hastey, your match is first. Allow me to present you with your opponent. He is one half of the NEW World Tag Team Champions, J.R. Ryder! Tenay: What a huge announcement by Michaels! Coach: This isn’t fair! Tenay: It is fair, dammit! Evolution is getting just what they deserve! Stay tuned, folks, Hastey vs Ryder is after the break! Adam Hastey vs J.R. Ryder Tenay: Also, during the break, Shawn Michaels announced that Austin Lee’s match will be against Brian Kendrick and Chris Benoit will be defending his title against Randy Orton in tonight’s main event! Match Background: Ryder, along with tag partner Brian Kendrick, beat Hastey (and Austin Lee) for the tag titles in a cage match at Unforgiven. Hastey must win this match to try and keep Evolution together. The Match: Flying elbow from Adam Hastey connects. VICIOUS lightning kick by Hastey on Ryder. Covers for a quick two count. Ryder reverses a waistlock. Spinning back kick from J.R. Ryder. THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. There's a two count on the pin. Back heel kick off the second rope, Hastey goes down. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! J.R. Ryder hits a rolling kick on Hastey. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Hastey counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! Superkick by Adam Hastey practically knocks out all of J.R. Ryder's teeth! There's a two count on the pin. DDT from the top rope by Adam Hastey. That looked KILLER! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Hastey hits a dropkick on J.R. Ryder and gets right back up. Adam Hastey kicks the leg, knocks Ryder down, and goes to work on it. J.R. Ryder powers out of a Adam Hastey headlock. Hastey takes a flying neckbreaker from J.R. Ryder. Springboard dropkick from J.R. Ryder. Nicely done. Adam Hastey can barely stand. Ryder Bomb! 1....2....3. Chris Benoit comes running down the aisle with a chair and into the ring! Ryder turns...and is dropped by a vicious chair shot! Chris Benoit has left Ryder down and bloodied. My Opinion: All it gets is a ***1\2 rating from me. Deal with it. Tenay: Benoit just busted J.R. Ryder wide open! Coach: Shawn Michaels said he would fire Evolution for interfering in the match, he didn’t say anything about post-match attacks! Tenay: That doesn’t matter, Chris Benoit just acted out of sheer desperation. If Austin Lee doesn’t win his match, Evolution is no more! Winner at 7:19: J.R. Ryder One Big Happy Family In the locker-room, Lodi and Rico are discussing their match strategy, when Ozzy Benton comes in. Ozzy: Okay, guys. You have a big match tonight and I think you’ll do well if you… Rico: Ozzy, honey, relax! Lodi and I have everything under control. Ozzy: Oh… you discussed your match strategy without me… again. Lodi: Don’t take it personally, Ozz-man. It’s just what Rico and I do. Ozzy: So, what exactly is my role as your manager if you two do everything without me? Rico: Well, we do have something you could join in on… Ozzy: NO! I meant in regards to wrestling! Rico: Oh that, well Ozzy-baby, don’t worry about it! You’re just is to stand there and look pretty so that Lodi and I look good! Ozzy: Argh! I’m not supposed to be pretty! I’m supposed to be menacing! This is stupid! Lodi: Okay, Ozzy. How about this. Rico and I win tonight, we keep things our way. If we lose, then you get to plan all of our strategies for now on. Ozzy: Deal! Good luck, gentlemen. The New Rainbow Express (with Ozzy Benton) vs Frank Shamrock and Bubba Ray Dudley Match Background: Rico and Lodi have their creative control on the line. Frank Shamrock just recently lost the Hardcore Championship and is teaming with Bubba Ray Dudley to see how things go as a team. The Match: Rico hits a back kick, doubling Bubbaover. Rico suplexes Bubba to the canvas and floats over. Hooks the leg for a two count. Tag to Lodi. Rico scoops up Bubba. Lodi bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Covers for a quick two count. Bubba takes a hard, stinging chop from Lodi. One word: Ow. Bubba Ray Dudley avoids a Lodi avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Bubba Ray Dudley hits a bulldog off the ropes. Hooks the leg for a two count. Tag to Frank Shamrock. Gutwrench into a stomach breaker. Lodi may be winded. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Lodi tastes a high angle back suplex. If Spike Lee can sue TNN over the Spike TV nonsense, then Kurt Angle should be able to sue SOMEONE for that. Lodi powers out of a Frank Shamrock headlock. Lodi arm drags Frank over and locks on an armbar. Tag to Rico. Rico hits a right hand on Frank Shamrock and follows it up with a couple more. Tag between Frank Shamrock and Bubba Ray Dudley. Running clothesline from Rico was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Bubba Ray Dudley grabs Rico from behind and shoves him into the ropes, then scores with a roll-up...but Rico rolls through with the move! He used a pull of the tights to get Bubba over! 1....2...3! The referee was out of position and didn't see it! The New Rainbow Express remain in the ring, celebrating their victory. My Opinion: Slightly above average match. Only gets a **3\4 rating from me. Tenay: Rico cheated to win the match! Coach: Seems like Rico and Lodi have no problems with their strategy. Rico and Lodi give Ozzy Benton toothy smiles and gleefully dance up the ramp, with Benton trailing behind in a slump. Winners at 4:01: Rico and Lodi, the New Rainbow Express The Pressure Heats Up Meanwhile, in the Evolution locker-room, Hastey and Lee are sitting down while Benoit is pacing. Benoit: Triple H lead this group for over three years without any problems, now one week without him and we are one pinfall away from being history. (Gets into Lee’s face). You need to beat Brian Kendrick. If you lose the match, you will have ended the legacy of this group. Our fate will be on your conscious. Watch your step out there. Lee: Are you kidding me, Benoit? What makes you think I will let myself lose this match! I owe Brian Kendrick big time for taking my tag title away from me! He left my blood in that steel cage at Unforgiven and I want revenge! Benoit: That’s the spirit! Go out there and make Evolution proud! Tenay: Austin Lee vs Brian Kendrick is next! Austin Lee vs Brian Kendrick Match Background: If Lee loses this match, Evolution is done with. The Match: Spinning back kick from Austin Lee. Dropkick connects to the BUTT of the jaw and Kendrick goes down. Lee just WAFFLES Kendrick with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Covers for a quick two count. Hard back suplex on Kendrick. Come to think of it, that move had WAY too much power in No Mercy for N64. There's a two count on the pin. Lee goes for a splash but Kendrick puts the knees up. Kendrick just WAFFLES Lee with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Hooks the leg for a two count. Flying cross body off the top rope! Austin Lee pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Diamond Dust from Austin Lee, Kendrick is out! Brian Kendrick is in trouble. Degenerate Driver!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!! Brian Kendrick leaves and walks back down the aisle. Wait...Austin Lee comes running as well, and Kendrick gets dropped with a clothesline, followed by a load of stomps. He is left lying in the aisle. My Opinion: A **** rating is well deserved for the competitors in this match. Tenay: The pressure got to Austin Lee! It wasn’t enough for him to just win the match, he had to brutalize Kendrick afterwards! Coach: Whew, I was afraid for a minute there! Evolution gets to stay together. Tenay: For now at least. Benoit must beat Orton in the main event to keep the group from being torn apart. Winner at 13:56: Austin Lee The Gathering CM Punk is sitting in his locker-room, when Raven (sporting the Hardcore Championship) comes in. Raven: Punk. Punk: Raven. Raven: So, tonight is it. You and Christian, one on one. Punk: Yeah, maybe tonight we can get some closure. Raven: Did Julio ever calm down after what Test did to Alexis? Punk: Yeah, winning at Unforgiven satisfied him for now. Test isn’t here this week. Raven: For the better, one less distraction for your match tonight. Punk: Yeah. Raven: I don’t think I’ve told you this yet, but I’m thinking about winding down on my wrestling career. Punk: What? You’re the Hardcore champion? Raven: Yes, I am. I will defend this title too, until I lose it. After that though, I don’t think I have much in me. It took way too much out of me to even beat Jeff Jarrett at Unforgiven. At another time I might have really been able to take it to him. Punk: But you did beat him! You can’t be giving up on us, Raven! Raven: I’m not giving up. I came to you tonight to ask you if I could become your manager. Punk: You? My manager?!? That would be an incredible honor but… I don’t know if I’d be worthy. Raven: Punk, you are more than worthy. You’ve been worthy for years now. You are a three time World Heavyweight Champion. You have main-evented WrestleMania. The real honor of being your manager belongs to me. The two men shake hands. Punk: Okay then. Now watch me destroy Christian, once and for all. CM Punk (with Raven) vs Christian Match Background: CM Punk more or less took over a feud with Christian from Raven back in July. This match is meant to be a finale to their war. The Match: Punk scoops and slams Christian. What's the difference between a scoop slam and a body slam anyway? CM Punk connects with rights and lefts and Christian is down! Christian takes a headbutt from CM Punk. Covers for a quick two count. BAAACK Body drop by Christian gets a bit of a pop from the crowd. Covers for a quick two count. Christian pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Christian connects with a HARD right hand, sending the opponent down to the mat again. There's a two count on the pin. Punk walks into a jaw breaker. Christian drops an elbow...but CM Punk moves out of the way. Brutal sit out powerbomb on Christian! CM Punk has Christian down on the canvas. Here it comes...Devil Lock! Christian taps! CM Punk remains in the ring, celebrating the victory. My Opinion: I'd love to see a rematch and see if they can top this. **** Tenay: CM Punk did it, he beat Christian! Coach: Those poor Beautiful People. Where’s Kid Romeo when you need him! Winner at 15:01: CM Punk Mattitude Problem Matt Hardy and Matt Stryker appear arriving at the building (Tenay makes a crack about how late they are). The duo runs into Shawn Michaels. Hardy: Hello, Mr. Michaels. Allow me to introduce myself… HBK: I know who you are. You’re a big shot from Smackdown who thought that Raw should have thrown you a parade for arriving here. Hardy: Well, that would have been nice. HBK: No, it would have annoyed me. Besides, the show is almost over and you’re just arriving now? Stryker: We had problems at the hotel. HBK: Oh really? I don’t care. I’m fining both of you for being late. Hardy: Damn it! I hate being on Raw! This sucks! Suddenly Tommy Dreamer appears out of no where with a kendo stick and nails both men over the back with it. Dreamer: This is just a reminder to you two assholes. Mess with Tommy Dreamer, and you will pay. Coach: What a vicious sneak attack by Tommy Dreamer! Tenay: I’d say he’s just putting those two jerks in their place, like he did at Unforgiven! Coach: I don’t see why Evolution can’t interfere in matches, but Dreamer is allowed to sneak up like that! World Heavyweight Championship: Chris Benoit © vs Randy Orton Match Background: This match is for the World Heavyweight title. Chris Benoit has been World Heavyweight champion since 27 June 2006. The Match: Orton takes a headbutt from Chris Benoit. Chris Benoit connects with a HARD right hand, sending the opponent down to the mat again. Flying shoulder tackle by Benoit sends Orton CRASHING to the mat. Orton gets caught with a short powerbomb from Benoit. Randy Orton avoids a Chris Benoit avalanche by getting out of the damn way! BIG clothesline on Benoit. Spear by Randy Orton. There's a two count on the pin. Chris Benoit once again takes the advantage after blocking a few punches and connecting with some forearms. Chris Benoit hits a stalling suplex on Orton. Covers for a quick two count. Northern Lights Bomb very nearly crushes the spine of Orton! Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Orton powers out of a headlock. Orton slams Chris Benoit. Chris Benoit comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Bodyslam by Benoit. Chris Benoit has Randy Orton down on the canvas. Randy Orton gets locked in the Crippler Crossface! Submission victory!. My Opinion: I'll give this a ***1\4 rating. If I left it up to you, you'd probably think it was the greatest match ever! Keep trying... Coach: Benoit did it! He retained his title over Orton! Evolution can stay together! Suddenly, some unfamiliar music begins to play. A new-comer comes running down the aisle and into the ring! Tenay: Wait, I know who that is! That’s Bryan Danielson! Coach: Who?!? Tenay: He’s known across the world as the American Dragon! Benoit turns around and is puzzled to see Danielson there. Danielson flattens Benoit with a clothesline and locks in the Cattle Mutilation! Coach: I’ve never seen a submission hold like that in all my years on Raw! Tenay: Benoit is screaming in pain! Hastey and Lee come running down the aisle, but Danielson hears them climbing onto the apron and unlocks the hold and rolls out of the ring. Lee and Hastey check on Benoit, while a sadistic grin breaks out on Danielson! Tenay: The American Dragon has arrived on Raw and has already provoked the World Champion! What’s going to happen next week! Winner at 10:42 and STILL World Heavyweight Champion: Chris Benoit

I would mark out for that! I used to dream about what a Turok animated series would be like (geared towards older viewers and all).

Batista is by far the most improved wrestler in the past year. Go back and watch him wrestle Kane at Armageddon 2002... you will cry. It's too bad that the Batista/Kane match from Raw last month was only a minute long or so, I was hoping they'd do a full match so I could compare it to the prior encounter.

Even though I don't think Aqua Teen is a stoner show, it seems like pretty much every stoner I know loves the show How does that work out?

The new version, simply because it really is just a prettier version of the old one (which I kind of thought looked silly in those final years).

2000 was an awesome year to be a wrestling fan. The WWF peaked that year, leading into WM X7 in early 2001.

Anyone remember Chyna eliminating Henry from the 99 Rumble? Apparently few did at the Rumble this year

That is true. Wrestlemania XX teased a wonderful new direction and future for WWE, that now seems like a daydream from long ago. Our world champions are now an unready youngster and a career mid-carder. Raw became great for a brief period while Smackdown has done little but slip. Ratings went up and then went back down. WWE dropped the ball once again.

I don't think I'd hate seeing Rodney Mack and Mark Henry as a tag team. Though Henry is a lost cause, I actually do see some potential in Mack.

Why is it whenever someone asks a "Which wrestler needs a new ::insert change here::" question, I automatically think of Garrison Cade? So to answer the question, Garrison Cade is in most need of some new tunes.

As a cashier at Best Buy, I noticed that not too many people were purchasing the Passion today. Hellboy and even The Girl Next Door were better sellers (at least out of the customers coming through my line, but I use them as a representation of sales in general, the charts tend to support me). I don't really have any interest in owning the movie, but I couldn't really afford it right now anyway.

Ah man, I really want to see this movie now Sounds better than Lost World and JP3 combined

I tried starting a "London" chant for good old Paul London at a Smackdown house show back in the spring... didn't work. Later on, I tried starting a Rhyno chant, but everyone in the building (buncha marks) were pissed that Rhyno had snuck up and gored John Cena.