Toxxic

Read: I nicked it from NOAH.

It's actually Toxxic-Pretz 3. The original 3 was scheduled to happen on Smarkdown but Spike (who hasn't been booked since then, for some reason) showed up and ruined our party so 4 will now take place on Smarkdown. Further comments... sometime.

If it'll help anyone out, I'd asked to be unbooked but you can throw me against Ghost Machine if it'll allow WC and ELM to have their rematch (since theirs is all storyline and everything). All I'd ask is that if the card is going to be changed, it's changed for when I get up tomorrow morning at latest.

Raynor should come back and use the Slingshot Dragon Superplex as the Acid Rayne v.4 (wasn't the V.2 a Slingshot Superplex?)

Scene: Melissa Fasaki's trailer/dressing room, somewhere in Amsterdam Time: Half an hour before Storm *knock-knock* “Hold on, I’m coming!” Melissa Fasaki calls at her door as she checks her makeup in the mirror one more time. With a quick sweep that tucks one side of her long, dark hair behind her left ear she prepares a smile for Wildchild, Tom Flesher or whoever is on the other side of the door and pulls it open… “What the…?” …but she wasn’t prepared to be greeted by a lopsided version of her own grin. “Evenin’,” Toxxic says, steel-grey eyes meeting Melissa’s dark ones. “Mind if I come in?” Mel backs away from the Straight-Edge Sensation, who apparently takes her retreat as an invitation and steps in before closing the door quietly behind him. His host swallows slightly as she sees this, then flashes him a dazzling smile anyway. “Hi!” she says, a trifle breathlessly. “Um… look, about Jerry? I really don’t know what got into him, I certainly didn’t have anything to do with ‘setting him on you’ or anything…” She laughs slightly nervously before ploughing on, “I mean, I hate it when he gets mad, and he got so mad-” “I know you didn’t have anything to do with it,” Toxxic cuts her off, waving one black-nailed hand dismissively, “in fact, I think I recall him saying that it was because you wouldn’t speak to him at all that made him so mad, so I know you didn’t say anything to spark him off.” “Oh… right… good!” Mel tries another smile, this one slightly more inquisitive. “So, er… to what do I owe the pleasure?” “Pleasure?” Toxxic snorts. “Odd word, given that you’re speaking to someone who broke your nose about six weeks ago.” Mel makes flapping motions with her hands, plainly trying to signal that the whole nose thing was no big deal. “Oh, don’t worry about it!” she tells her visitor. “Heat of the moment, water under the bridge and everything, ya know?” “No,” Toxxic says slowly, fixing her with another steel-grey stare. “No, I don’t think I do.” The Brit lets that statement hang in the air for a moment before looking briefly at a chair, then glancing quizzically up at Melissa. She motions for him to sit and the young straight-edger sprawls into the chair, then crosses his legs in front of him. “See, I broke your nose,” he reiterates. “I got involved in your brother’s match, which I shouldn’t have done. You took exception to that and slapped me… so I headbutted you. Heat of the moment, like you say,” he continues, “but that doesn’t make it right. Again, if I remember what Ejiro said correctly, you were so mad at him for not keeping you safe that you didn’t want to speak to him. So not only did I cause you physical injury, I damaged your family relations.” Toxxic shrugs. “Seems like sort of a big deal to me.” “Well, you know how families are,” Mel tries. “I mean, would you get upset if someone hit your sister… if you’ve got one, that is?” “Funny you should say that,” Toxxic grins humourlessly, “some wanker in a club nutted my sister last year.” The Straight-Edge Sensation’s smile widens slightly. “When they pulled her off him, half his ear came away in her teeth.” Seeing Melissa’s hands make an involuntary movement towards her own ears in sympathy, Toxxic seems to shake himself and sits forward. “But that’s not why I came here,” he says. “I came here for one reason; I’d like to apologise.” “You… apologise?” Mel says, caught completely off-guard. “Erm… well… thank you? Apology accepted,” she continues, getting a slightly better grip on herself. “I hope you won’t be offended if I say I didn’t expect that…?” “Nah, not at all,” Toxxic shrugs, “I’ve got a reputation as an arsehole.” He pauses for a moment, then purses his lips before continuing. “Actually… I think I came here for something else, as well.” “Yes?” Melissa says, sitting down opposite and crossing her legs. Toxxic raises an eyebrow at this, but then seems to accept it and continues. “I want to explain something. I can’t say this to Ejiro, and I don’t know how much you speak to him at the moment,” he begins, then forges on before Mel can reply, “but maybe in the future, if he ever expresses any curiosity about it, you could tell him. Y’see, I think he’s gonna wonder why, after all that time with the World Title, I never tried to get a rematch with him. I mean, I know I made that big statement about not wanting the hassle and all, but I don’t think he’d buy it.” The Straight-Sensation leans back again, watching Melissa through his eyeliner, but the female Fasaki gives no sign as to her opinion of that statement. “The fact is, it’s about impact,” Toxxic says. “I know that if I was to get back into the ring with Ejiro now, I’d be fighting for my life. He’s got so much anger wound up inside him I don’t know if it’s even directed at me anymore… but once I got into the ring, it definitely would be. It’s not what he could do to me that concerns me,” the Brit clarifies, “because I think I know what he brings to the table now, I think I could take him. No, it’s the fact that I’d have to fight fire with fire. It’s the things I’d have to do to him to stop him.” “Right,” Melissa says, “go on.” Toxxic looks up, at her but she seems the very picture of an attentive audience. “Ejiro knows what he’s getting into when he steps into the ring. He knows the risks he’s taking,” Toxxic begins again, “but what I really came to realise after our little… encounter… was the effect it has on other people. For example, Kibagami,” the Straight-Edge Sensation continues, expression twisting as the hated name crosses his lips, “does he have anyone who loves him? Does he have a girlfriend, a wife? I know there was someone a couple of years ago, but now? Who knows. I didn’t. I broke his neck, and never thought about it. Justin Bowers?” Toxxic ploughs on. “He studied under Ejiro’s old friend, William Heartford. He stepped up and I knocked him down, and after our match I saw the tears on his mentor’s face. I don’t know how long Heartford had trained Bowers for, but he cared what happened to him. He really did.” Toxxic’s expression has grown stony now, but the list continues. “Sacred? I don’t even know what happened to Sacred, just that he didn’t come back after the beating I gave him. Does Andrew Blackwell have anyone who loves him, now? Can anyone even ever know the man? Again, I don’t know.” Toxxic leans forward, putting his face quite close to Melissa’s… and she doesn’t draw away. “Ejiro? I know there are people close to him. I’m looking at one now. I saw how he reacted when I injured you, and I know that to stop him I’d have to do much, much worse.” Toxxic grins again, but there’s still no humour there. “Ejiro knows the risks he takes, but I don’t want to have to that to anyone. Not in the ring, and not outside it by association. Not ever.” “You mean you didn’t go after Jerry again because of me?” Melissa asks. “Toxxic, I… I’m flattered!” “Don’t be,” the straight-edger tells her bluntly. “But anyway, I have a match to go and get ready for…” “Oh, you don’t need to go yet!” Mel says, standing up before him. “I mean, you’ve apologised and I’ve accepted it, there’s no reason for us not to be friends, now is there?” she continues, flashing the Straight-Edge Sensation a smile. “Fancy a drink?” Her hand closes on a bottle of scotch, but then she quickly takes it off again and mutters something about “I’m sure I’ve got some soda somewhere…” “No, thanks, I’m good,” Toxxic tells her, rising to his feet. “Oh well, if you’re sure there’s nothing else…” Melissa says, curling her hair around one finger, apparently quite absent-mindedly. Toxxic just looks at her for a moment, then nods. “Yeah, I’m sure. Still, it’s good to see I didn’t leave a mark,” he adds as he heads for the door. “Excuse me?” “Your face,” the Brit replies, turning around to find Melissa closer behind him than he expected. He raises one black-nailed finger towards her nose. “Doesn’t look like I damaged anything too bad.” He flashes a lopsided grin. “You’re still as pretty as you were.” “Oh, now I am flattered,” Mel laughs, turning her face away slightly but looking sideways at him with her big dark eyes. Toxxic holds her gaze for a moment as his smile fades… then returns. This time however, the grin is lacking its humour again and makes the straight-edger look considerably more sinister than before. “You know, I feel kinda sorry for Ejiro,” Toxxic says, looking Melissa up and down briefly, “having a girl like you as his sister…” Without another word, he opens the door and strides through it, shutting it behind him to leave Mel Fasaki staring at the back of it. “Now what was that supposed to mean…?”

I remember seeing the Dragon Suplex in Janus' stats when I had my matches with him last year and thinking 'hmm, cool move... but NO-ONE should be able to kick out of a Strength 10 Dragon Suplex, let alone my little weed...'

MVS sucks! Nice promo, even making the loss to Zyon work in the context of the feud. So that's all good.

MikeofEvil. Big surprise.

No. Next question?

We've been pre-empted by fucking U2? Fuck that! *goes off and shoots Bono*

And this is why English people will never post cards. 1am for you = 6am for us.

MAIN EVENT - Three-Time World Champion Classic, Vol 3.0 El Luchador Magnifico vs. Danny Williams Rules: Standard. Word Limit: 6000 ~Hmm. I KNOW who's going to win this... but I'm not telling. PURE RULES - SWF World Heavyweight Championship Ejiro Fasaki © vs. Wildchild Rules: Standard, with Pure Wrestling addenda - each wrestler has three rope breaks. A wrestler loses a rope break when he throws a closed-fist punch or uses the ropes to break a submission hold. If a wrestler with no rope breaks left attempts to use the ropes to break a submission hold, the rope break is of no effect and the submission stays on; if he throws a punch, he is disqualified. Word Limit: 7000 ~If it's worked then I say WC wins to go on and face Johnny. If both sides are writing to win... tricky. The stip would favour Ejiro, but then again WC DID study under this guy in 2003 so he could conceivably be written to win. Ah, fuck it. WC. SUBMISSION MATCH - SWF World Cruiserweight Championship Toxxic vs. Scott Pretzler © Rules: Standard, with cruiserweight addenda, and the stipulation that the match may not end with a pin - countouts and disqualifications are in effect, but the only clean way to win is by forcing your opponent to submit. Word Limit: 6000 ~Rane SINGLES MATCH Johnny Dangerous vs. "The Franchise" Mak Francis Rules: Standard. Word Limit: 5000 ~Is Mak still around and writing? I'd have to give him the nod over Johnny if so, but Johnny tends to be a little more consistent... and I can't help but think that given Mak's absence, Tom booked this for a high-profile win-over-a-no-show for our upcoming World Title challenger... SINGLES MATCH Zyon vs. Todd Cortez Rules: Standard. Word Limit: 4500 ~I SHOULD be picking Cortez. But Zyon rocks, so I'm picking the Z Man (no, not Tom Zenk). TAG TEAM MATCH Arch Griffon and Manson vs. "The Dean of Professional Wrestling" Jay Hawke and JJ Johnson Rules: Standard. Use the tag ropes. Word Limit: 4500 ~GRIFFOSITY... but it'll be close.

Indeed not the case, Pretz. He's called something remarkably usual actually, although i can't remember it. However, being actively insulted by Kibagami is something of a fed hobby. That being said, if you start talking about active and passive voices like you know what it means, I'll bitchslap you myself.

IT'S A SUPERIOR BIRTHDAY!

Post your match in a losing match thread, and we'll see. As with the Ejiro match, a better-written match can sometimes win out over a more 'dramatic' match despite differences in length or squashdom. On one infamous occassion, there was a rather obnoxious n00b present who was using a character called Candace Okimurra (basically his own walking wet dream of a small Japanese woman who did everything her manager wanted). Candace was beating no-showers and becoming enormously arrogant as a result, not to mention thoroughly pissing off the fed with badly-written, ludicrous and sometimes downright offensive promos. Flesher, the then-Cruiserweight champion, was booked against her in a match and destroyed her with a 5k squash which gave her one or two offensive moves maximum. But he won, and fairly so, because his match was BETTER than the opposition. If your match was on a par with Griffon's then if yours contained more back-and-forth offence I might have been inclined to say that yours was more deserving. However, Griff's might just be better. Post it, and we'll see. Finally, your gimmick probably isn't helping. It's stupid. People aren't really inclined to take it seriously, and that might (I said MIGHT) count against you. In the early days of the fed when it was Mayor McCheese and Exploding Chicken, you might have had a better chance. But it's entirely up to you whether you decide to change that or not.

I still say that Batista is great on the mic. He sounds NATURAL rather than pre-scripted, which is oh-so rare. Wrestling-wise? Yup, fairly meh. He can dish out a few power moves to pop the crowd, he's JUST about watchable in a PPV main event as long as he has an opponent who knows what he's doing - and I count Triple H in that. I can't stand him and he's NOWHERE near as good as he thinks, but he's competent at making the face look good in a match, even if he generally squashes them at the end and makes them look like shit over the course of the programme. I mean come on, what would you rather see in your main event? Face Batista vs Heel Triple H? Or Batista vs Cena, in any alignment? 20 minutes of punch-kick my friend, with barely a move worth the name.

Eyes down look in on: OPENING PROMOAGE Well, Ejiro brings the goodness here as he talks about how life hasn't been all wine and roses since defeating the Evil One, and then Wildchild talks about banging Ejiro's sister (well, OK, maybe not) and then Johnny comes out with some five o'clock shadow and is FOCUSED ON THE TASK AT HAND~! Really though, this angle is oozing with potential. You have the possibility of something personal in there to give it added 'bite', but at the end of the day it IS about the World Title as well, as it should be. Johnny's 'beautiful people' and 'ugly people' shows one of two things, too; either he's been listening to too much Marilyn Manson, or the character is slowly continuing down the road towards self-serving heel. And that can only be a good thing. And I think we all know the result we want here: Johnny Dangerous to win at Ground Zero, so I can take it off him in the Main Event of Genesis for the second year in a row GRIFFSONOSITY vs MYERS AND A DALEK Yeah, I don't think Manson and Griffon (well, Griffon anyway since Manson's apparently AWOL) took this all that seriously. Still a good short match though, with King drinking his way through and an emphasis on clotheslines. Soon they could be the only tag team left, unless Jarrod Banks ever digs those bullets out... I PROMO WITH FLESHER Basically, we're having a Best of Five. To one-up WC? Well, not really. More that we wanted space to have the feud develop from a friendly rivalry into something definitely UNfriendly, whereas WC and Pretz were instantly enemies so went all-out from the start. Plus it gives us something to do. LANDON PROMOS This is all good stuff. I think the nicest touch is King adding his own personal 'boo'. Landon is still an egotistical asswipe even when he's trying to be nice, and his last attempt is too little, too late... Of course i like the fact that it's mentioned I was right all along (but come on, what self-respecting super-heel WOULDN'T have tried a few minds games there?), and I for one am looking forward to the Cortez/Maddix showdown. I hope it keeps brewing for Genesis too, because the sneaky, cheating, flashy Landon vs the down-to-earth, street-fighting Cortez would be a great show. LANDON vs BUCK THAT NEVER HAPPENED Quick comedy moment. All good. WILDCHILD AND MAGS Ooh... one of ELM's justifications for not being good recently is that he 'barely managed' to beat Wildchild... I can't see that going down too well with THA GREATEST CRUISERWEIGHT OF ALLLLLLL TIME! PRETZLER vs ZYON Good to see those sound-effects being used. You run with that Pretz. Run all the way! Anyway, the match. Although it's well-known that my knowledge of wrestling pyschology isn't great, it does appear to me that Pretz has put together a good match in terms of 'arrogant veteran vs youthful underdog'. Of course, their respective movesets only help with this as Pretzler is able to control the match with submissions (NOT restholds!) while Zyon occasionally breaks free and lets rip with his spot-tastic offence. In fact, a lot of things about this match make it good. I particularly like the credibility given to the finishers, as Pretzler struggles to apply the Snowflake Clutch and Zyon does everything in his power to avoid it. Pretzler also shows adaptability as instead of trying to get back to his feet to counter the Final Flash he plays possum, unlike the previous time. The only gripe I would have is with the outside count (the rest of the outside sequence was very good) as I'm sure it should have restarted when Pretzler exited the ring, even though Zyon pulled him out. Otherwise a great job, as it not only put Pretzler over as a formidable wrestler but made Zyon look very good at pulling tricks out of the bag to nearly get the upset. MAIN EVENT It's a co-write. Read it if you want. I'll just point out that I had to edit out ELM's commentary calling Toxxic a 'cockney' (for those who don't know, cockneys are people born within a certain area of London - specifically, within the sound of the Bow Bells. Toxxic is of course from Nottingham, and not even prevailing winds carry it that far north).

What IS a Kibagummy-saver?

I know being of Arab descent doesn't automatically make you Muslim. Crimson Platypus seemed to be suggesting that because he's an Arab American he can't be a Muslim. It's a little different. As for Daivari, I liked how vs Jericho he was screaming in Farsi all match except for one rear chinlock where he was yelling 'HOLD ON! HOLD ON!' and then went back to yelling in Farsi again.

The comment about the cock has a certain classless humour about it. The racist slur was totally out of order.

FYI, Hassan assumes a praying position similar if not identical to that of Muslims before his matches, and sometimes after. In addition, he IS portrayed as an Arab American. He could also be a Muslim. Being American does not preclude you from being Muslim, as your post would suggest.

Given that's been the universal signal for 'This match is OVER, bitches!' (or similar) for many, many years, I think we can forgive him for that. Using the Camel Clutch as a finisher in this day and age? Not so sure about that.

Personally, as a 23 year-old the terrorists I grew up with in mainland Britain WERE the IRA, not Arabs. Terrorism is terrorism, it has no defining features beyond a crass disregard for human life. On the other hand, you cannot watch TV without an understanding of social context unless you've been locked in a box for years. Hassan's first EVER words in the WWE were 'Since the attacks of 9/11...', showing that the biggest event of terrorism ever to occur in America was to be at least vaguely related to his character in some way. The character is clearly Islamic, like Al-Quaeda (and like millions of non-terrorists as well of course). The character also disapproves of American values. The character has stated that he will 'fight against' what he perceives as racism. All well and good. Now; that fact that Hassan is portrayed as a heel (badmouths the popular wrestlers, cheats and whines quite apart from any political statements he might make) automatically suggests that his viewpoint is wrong. Therefore, his allegations of racism are, in the WWE's world, wrong. So, this bad guy wrestler will be 'fighting against' the values of an America that he wrongly believes is racist, and he is doing so from an Arab and Islamic background. What method of fighting (and since his actions are perceived to be 'wrong', we're talking actual fighting rather than just political discussion) against American values that they believe to be evil is used by Islamic people of Arab descent? Well, since the attacks of 9/11 (and again, HE mentioned it first so it's obviously meant to be related to the character) the word 'terrorism' DOES spring to mind. OBVIOUSLY not every Arab-American is a terrorist. OBVIOUSLY every not every Muslim is a terrorist. But in this situation, it's what we might call circumstantial evidence that the Hassan character is meant to be at least loosely associated with terrorism. Now, he comes out with a gang of men on Smackdown to attack his enemy. Fair enough, could just be some mates who don't want to be recognised. I haven't seen the segment, but I saw one fan pic and IIRC the men were in ski masks and camo gear. Camo gear is obviously of military derivation, no matter how often it's commonly used as casual wear these days. The fact that they were all dressed the same lends credence to the notion of a 'uniform', again of military origin. Ski masks... well, they COULD have just come in off the piste but this item of clothing also has a well-recognised connection to paramilitary groups. The piano-wire choking action... this is the point I'm least convinced on, but I can see how it COULD fit. Daivari carried out as a martyr certainly works, as it fits in the with the suicide bombers so well known in both the 9/11 attacks and every week in the Middle East. Yes, normally it would be a jump to associate men in camo gear and ski masks, and one man being carried out as a martyr, with terrorism in the name of extreme Islam. HOWEVER, since Daivari is portrayed as sharing Hassan's religion, and most importantly of all they are BOTH associated with a man whom we have already established is meant to have at least a loose, subconcious connection with terrorism in the minds of the viewing public, I think it's a safe case to make that the men in ski masks and camo gear WERE meant to be portrayed as terrorists. Given that Sky made 10 minutes of Raw disappear without trace (Diva Search 'cum-sucking gutter slut' incident), I'm surprised and a little offended that they didn't ditch this. Also, for those who have talked about movies and how people don't get offended by them - YOU BET YOUR FUCKING LIFE that if a movie about terrorism had been scheduled on ANY British TV channel last night, it would have been axed and replaced with something else. The same goes for any drama featuring terrorism, it would have been postponed for AT LEAST a week, possibly more. Thank you.

“Fans, I’m here backstage with Toxxic,” Ben Hardy says as the feed comes back… and sure enough, there beside the bespectacled interviewer is the Straight-Edge Sensation. “Well Toxxic, earlier on tonight we heard your thoughts on the situation with you and Scott Pretzler,” Hardy continues, “but what about your upcoming match with El Luchadore Magnifico, next? Do you think you can turn around the slump that you seem to be in at the moment?” “You know Ben,” Toxxic replies, glaring at the interviewer, “I’d really like to take offence at that word ‘slump’… unfortunately,” he continues heavily, “I can’t. What with losing the World Title to Ejiro, losing to Spike at 13th Hour and then losing two singles matches on the bounce for the first time ever to Danny and Scott, I’ve lost more matches in the last six weeks that I did in the previous six months. However, despite the fact that tonight’s match won’t be easy either I am definitely looking forward to it.” Toxxic stops and cracks his neck from side-to-side, perhaps as an early warm-up. “You see, I challenged Danny Williams simply in the name of athletic competition. As I’ve made perfectly clear, I’ve had enough of grudge matches where people are in it to cause long-term damage - I just want to wrestle, and to prove myself against the best possible opposition.” Toxxic grins slightly ruefully as he continues “unfortunately, I couldn’t quite get it done against Danny… but on Storm, Magnifico came to see me and said he wanted in on the deal. Now, I had a few things on my mind at the time, but I can really appreciate someone who wants in simply for the chance to compete at the top of their game with the best competitors in the business. So tonight, I’m looking forward to my match with El Luchadore Magnifico, win, lose or draw. Of course,” Toxxic adds, “I’m going to be doing my best to ensure it is a win.” “Can I have a definite prediction?” Hardy asks, extending his microphone again. “Yeah, sure. Forest are going back up this season.” With that, Toxxic heads off towards the ring leaving Ben Hardy staring after him. “What do you reckon, Gus? Some sort of soccer reference?” Gus can only shrug, causing the camera to jolt alarmingly. “Meh, whatever,” Hardy sighs. “King, Pete - it’s all yours!”

a TRAIN Rando, not A-Train! Jesus! *tuts* Bloody ex-SWFers...