Toxxic

Actually, I don't mind Hassan's matches. Sure, he's no genius but at least he has a focus for his offence. Every single move targets the back to set up the Camel Clutch. ...yes, I know he always uses the Downward Spiral to win instead. Shush.

I'd like to point that Toxxic is also a cruiserweight, thanks very much, and while not a submission wrestler per se has managed some notable victories using submissions, including the main event of Genesis V. I thank you. But why is it for the CW title?

I'm only 23, and I can still remember the times when IRA bombs in London were occurring on a pretty much monthly basis. I can remember the big bombing in Manchester, although I can't remember exactly how long ago it was. Even if these things start going off every couple of months in the bigger cities, it won't be anything we haven't lived through before.

A couple of messages. This one is a letter to the terrorists in the London News Review: What the fuck do you think you're doing? This is London. We've dealt with your sort before. You don't try and pull this on us. Do you have any idea how many times our city has been attacked? Whatever you're trying to do, it's not going to work. All you've done is end some of our lives, and ruin some more. How is that going to help you? You don't get rewarded for this kind of crap. And if, as your MO indicates, you're an al-Qaeda group, then you're out of your tiny minds. Because if this is a message to Tony Blair, we've got news for you. We don't much like our government ourselves, or what they do in our name. But, listen very clearly. We'll deal with that ourselves. We're London, and we've got our own way of doing things, and it doesn't involve tossing bombs around where innocent people are going about their lives. And that's because we're better than you. Everyone is better than you. Our city works. We rather like it. And we're going to go about our lives. We're going to take care of the lives you ruined. And then we're going to work. And we're going down the pub. So you can pack up your bombs, put them in your arseholes, and get the fuck out of our city. And this by some blogger called Tim Worstall. Just in case you all think my Toxxic dialogue is cheesy and OTT: Many years ago I was working in The City and there were two events that made travel into work almost impossible. The first was a series of storms that brought down power lines, blocked train routes and so on. Not surprisingly, the place was empty the next day. Why bother to struggle through? The other event was an IRA bomb which caused massive damage and loss of life. Trains were disrupted, travel to work the next day was horribly difficult and yet there were more people at work than on a normal day. There was no co-ordination to this, no instructions went out, but it appeared that people were crawling off their sick beds in order to be there at work the next day, thrusting their mewling and pewling infants into the arms of anyone at all so that they could be there. Yes, we’ll take an excuse for a day off, throw a sickie. But you threaten us, try to kill us? Kill and injure some of us? Fuck you, sunshine. We’ll not be having that. See?

It would suck for Hassan if he got released because they decided his character was too risky. Bottom line, it was the office's booking, not his. That's not to say that I wouldn't like him to tone it down a bit... but at the end of the day this entire character was developed from the terrorist attack on the USA. There's no reason why anyone in WWE management should give a shit about what's happening in OUR neck of the woods when they're busy trying (and failing) to make money from an attack on their own country.

Isn't Washington DC Hassan's announced hometown as well? Or am I making that up? As for the terrorist/UK thing, I don't think Vince will have a say. Sky will take it out themselves if they feel like it. The entire Diva search 'cum-sucking gutterslut' segment disappeared without trace over here.

LOlZ!"

His grasp of grammar's not bad either. *ducks*

They just need O'Haire, and not in a 'Piper's Little Errand Boy' way.

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is the difference between Flesher and the rest of the roster. Is it in his amazing grasp of amateur wrestling? No. In his history of tremendous matches, and his two fantastic hot streaks as World Champion? No. It's the fact that he can be pissed and still remain polite.

Brock Lesnar back can only be a good thing. He's a better worker than a lot of the roster, a decent interview and has a look that just screams 'MONSTER!' But they're going to have to do it the right way. They can have him come back as a monster heel (safest bet since he might get legitimate heel heat for the manner of his departure), a monster face (a bit riskier, but I think that's how his best matches came - he just works at a much higher tempo as a face, and is the sort of unstoppable face monster that Batista would be if he was ten years younger and much more agile), or the sneaky, chickenshit heel he was when he left (which is career suicide - why would someone who looks like he can beat the shit out of 99% of the roster and go a fair toe-to-toe with the other 1% be a coward?).

The whole 'Spike returning to teaching' thing... I want to see the school with him AND Kane teaching. "OK Bobby, you might think it's funny to flick ink at me, but I'm very good friends with our headteacher Mr. Jacobs..." *Kane enters the room and red pyro erupts from the desks in the corners* "Bobby, it's time for your Big Red Detention!!"

Distracted by Cherry Coke (gimmick, OK), women (fair enough) and movies? Is his opponent going to pay the production crew to suddenly start playing The Godfather on the Smarktron to distract JJF and catch a cheap pin?

No, my last comment was NOT sarcastic. I was thanking you for not giving up and leaving after your first defeat in the federation, especially since you felt that you had been unfairly discriminated against due to the length of your match compared to Ejiro's. Considering the amount of people who join this fed only to never show (often the ones with 'stupid' gimmicks - see Flash, Jumping Jack) it's a pleasant change to see someone with a bizarre gimmick who's actually going to stick around. That being said, I still don't like JL Crunk, but it's your character so you can, to an extent, do as you please.

Beware the consequences of he who attacks others without permission. SHould you steal the World Title in a promo without permission, I think it's safe to say that your arse is grass. In other news, thanks for not sulking about your loss.

I still loved the Sly promo from God knows how long ago after his first win when he has to ask the girl he woke up with who she was - simple but effective heel character. Jobber To The Stars!

Something that's only just occurred to me - didn't Todd and Megan inform Landon that they were together at the SWF Christmas Party? So why the sudden surprise now? 'Darth Maddix' is great, btw. And finally, as for Toxxic's gullibility - it is sort of linked to his face turn, in a way. Since 13th Hour Toxxic has been fed up with the backstabbing and permanent conflict of his career which is what caused the turn, so I think that this willingness to believe that Pretzler might still be his friend is partly wishful thinking. In addition to that, Pretzler has his own arrogance/moral code (interchange as you see fit) so it's entirely possible that Toxxic would think that Pretzler wouldn't break their agreement through being too egotistical. Lastly, as Pretzler points out, it was Flesher who told Toxxic about the reasons for the rematch and they have NEVER got on, so he was more likely to believe a former stablemate than his old enemy who likes to fuck with people he doesn't like (see; Dangerous, Johnny; Fasaki, Ejiro; Maddix; Darth).

Me and Pretz used Brian Warner, so we're just as guilty. I'd wrote him in for me vs Danny and obviously lost, so I carried him over without thinking.

Zyon actually kinda reminds me of me. Maybe how Toxxic would have turned out if he'd been a little less uptight and remained face. Yeah, and the fact that he has three-dozen named moves probably doesn't hurt the resemblance

The trouble with grammar checks is that they tend to only be useful for highlighting errors you might have missed - if you don't know grammar in the first place, they can be as confusing as helpful.

To be fair, I do remember a 6k match between Charlie 'Grappler' Matthews and Coy West (Ejiro's other character) being awarded to Grappler even though he wrote about 4k and Ejiro wrote the full 6k simply because Grappler's match was judged to be better.

I think the Martial Law breakup WAS handled really well, and at least someone's taking over from me as Top Heel. It really fits with Landon's character to be so offended about a girl saying she DIDN'T sleep with him. So now the cheating, arrogant arsehole is a heel and the (still pretty arrogant) flashy, non-cheating spotmonkey is a face. Christ, are we still in the SWF? That actually sounds LOGICAL! Congrats to all, and thank fuck Ejiro retained. I mean, a part of me would have LOVED Ghost Machine to take the title, but overall it's probably better this way.

This is where I start wondering if it's too much against my newly-faceish character to tell Todd Cortez 'I told you so'. IN other news, E!L!M! E!L!M!

Come on Mike, at least he told you early. ...ish.

Come on Landon. We might as well give the pregnancy angle a shot here. For what it's worth, I think there'll be at least one Toxxic promo on most shows for the near future. I can see you all holding your heads in your hands, but hey, maybe the marker isn't sick of me yet?