Hoff

Part four. The DoC promo -- and how odd is it having CoD and DoC -- but it was good, I liked it, I got it. It seeemed odd that Devin and Phenom were suddenly much more articulate, but I'll let it slide for good writing's sake. I liked the altercation with Black T to a point, but having physical contact is more likely to initiate a feud, and having the manager take Dan Black out is kind of degrading to black. And of course, NEVER use people's characters without asking. That's not okay. The Hoff/Axel segment was the best thing ever, you don't have to say it. Zack, I gotta say, I'm a fan of linking to the song/video, but having that whole page come up was kind of annoying. If there was a way to use personal webspace somehow, that might be better, though I'm aware there's some limitations. Anyway, very nice touch. Great match, great TV match moreover, in that it didn't have to be a thirty minute marathon to be high in action and well built. Nice touch with Axel, and it played on the earlier tension. Very nice finish, and I *really* liked the "count from the fans." Well played. The LATER Cal/Dude segment did a LOT for me as far as clarification. I was hoping I could get that out earlier, but Frig got his undies in a twist. Booooooo. But yeah, I liked it. I like the Dude's violent streak. Zack's new shirt is cool! GREAT tag match, and great use of not just commentary but well-timed commentary, that enhanced the match while seeming in the flow of the match. It's something I value, pride myself on doing well, and look for in other people's work. The action was great, a little slower than AP I felt, but very smart, sound, logical, and well-done. I love that "Chimera Suplex Sequence," BTW. Great match with a great finish, possibly spurring some tension in TOE, as well as between CoD and the GPX. I look forward to where both of those situations go. So yeah, very good show, some big new developments and a lot of good action.

- Standard GPX match which is meant as high praise, if you feel me. Lots of cool spots. The docs are slowly winning me over. I *liked* the Calvin/Dude promo (I thought it was That 70's Guy?), and I'm excited about the feud, but it felt a little out of left field, to be honest. I know Cal needs someone to feud with, but why Dude? Still, storng promo pimping the changes in Szechstein. PR/"Time's Up" served it's purpose. Good advancement of the Panther/Puerto Rican storyline. I'm not sure if I'm happy about the LC's return or not, though. I liked the idea of just PR, with Popick as manager. We'll see where it goes. CATTY Zack/Crystal/Axel promo. Axel and Crystal might not be built to last, sad to say. I'm glad to see J. Arthur back. The W&H guys were addressed, as was father in a BIG way. Good promo. Okay, I've officially been given a two-minute warning from the library (OMG SAMOAN ASSAULT~!), so this is it for now, part four (4!) later tonight, hopefully.

Part deux... Black T is PISSED~! I like the reactions of the former and current tag champs after the PPV. You guys rock. P.R. shows some anger in a well-written promo. I like how the normally cocky, humorous PR started using words like "doody head" when he got mad. Nice touch. Part three forthcoming. Stupid library...

I know I haven't finished feedbacking AP yet, but Frig called me...a name...in the other thread and so I have to do this. Rodez's pre-show segment was interesting. I was actually very worried that KC was leaving; now that that's seemingly not the case, I'm very interested in where this goes. I'm a little hesitant to get into this because it's got a slight Russo vibe to it, to be honest, BUT...KC's a competent writer and the Rodez character has been developed well, so let's call it cautiously optimistic. The opening segment came off really well. NYU, Adam, and I co-wrote it and I had my worries, but it worked. So props to them. Let's overlook the Bill Watts "is he in the arena or not" snafoo. I like that CoD showed a little arrogance in the aftermath of their title win. Pretty brutal HH/FS match and, if this makes sense, the brutality was enhanced by the COARSE language used. I liked it. I'm not always a fan of cursing on our show, but this worked great. Josie's introduction as HeldDOWN GM was handled well. Okay, I'm at the library and they're about to shut me down, so I'm breaking this into two posts. If post two never appears you'll know what happened.

Tony I'll come looking for whoever I want to come looking. ...For. ...Yeah.

Go for it. Tony -- if anything stops Drek/Hoff from MEing I'm gonna find you, and WHEN I DO.... *dun dun dun*

I'll have comments for all the whiners about not getting any comments....later. Promise! I'm already late for a dinner date, as it stands. But let me just say that I'm thrilled Patty got what I was trying to do with the post being in HE instead of here. I dunno, I wish we'd do more stuff like this, the House Show reports, tc.

Feedback....well, whenever I finish the AP feed. But a comment. Let me know if you liked the little backstage thing I put up. If people did, I think we should or at least could do more, as something to advance storylines and/or add depth to our characters.

Okay, so I got talking so SOMEONE *coughNYUcough* online and now I'm way tired. But here's like a thrid of the feedback. CoD/TOE: Acronym'd~! Very hot, fast opener, that popped the crowd. CoD seem to really be getting over. I liked it, for a guy who claims not to be the biggest fan, Patty is really good at writing exciting matches. I know that he and Zack collaborated, and it flowed well. Very cool. Drek's promo was fun. He crossed that line again from cocky to EVIL, I enjoy that thoroughly. Whenever I picture a PR promo, I picture him all crazy and bug-eyed. Not Evad Sullivan crazy, but intesne. He's a fun read. The 24/7 title match was a change of pace for Phenom, but not a bad one. Good match with Phenom fighting off the hellacious onslaught. I thought it did a lot for Geddon, actually. Very neat twist at the end. Calvin's promo literally has me excited. I am not lying. I loved it. When I started, Cal was the champion and even though I knew his character a bit, I viewed him as the end-all, be-all guy. I'm stoked. ...more later, promise.

I liked the show.

OMG I heard there's exclusive online content available now... o.O

I love you.

I might. Be checking your inbox.

The scene opens on none other than the "Macho Man," Randy Savage! SAVAGE OOOOOOOOOOOOOH YEEEEEEEAH, DIG IT!! It's the MACH-O MAAAAN comin' at ya LIVE FROM THE OAOAST CONTROL CENTER, OOOOOH YEAH!!!! This week's HELDDOWN was amazing, DIG IT!! But one thing that the cameras DIDN'T CATCH was our own JOSH MATTHEWS, OOOOOOH YEEEEEEAH DIG IT~!!! SNAP INTO A SLIM JIM, OOOO-- PRODUCER (offstage) Randy, get to the point. SAVAGE OOOOOH YEAH I GET THE POINT!! DIG IT!!! Anyway, Josh Matthews CAUGHT UP WITH HOFF IN THE LOCKER ROOM OOOOOOOH YEAH!!! After the show went off the air! HERE'S WHAT HOFF HAD TO SAY!!! The shot mercifully cuts away from Macho and to the locker room in Maui, where Hoff sits on the bench in jeans and a black t-shirt, a duiffelbag packed at his side. On a chair, across from Hoff, sits the stone col' pimp himself, Josh Matthews. J-MATH Hoff. What is your initial reaction to Bill Watts granting you a title shot? HOFF (all smiles) Well, of course, I'm *beep*ing thrilled about it. I mean, I lobbied pretty hard for this. I knew that Zero Hour was going to be held in Minneapolis and I figured that featuring myself would do big business, but ultimately, the final call was Bill's and he let me know just before the show went on. It was a great feeling. He told me, " this is the direction we want to go, and we think you'd make a great champion, and a great cornerstone." So it's a bit of an honor that way. As long as I can beat Drek... J-MATH Can you beat Drek Stone? He'e been on quite a roll lately, scoring some decisive victories. HOFF Yeah, but then so was Crystal, and I beat her not once, but twice. I mean I don't want to take anything away from Drek. I may not like the guy -- I don't think anyone does, really (laughing) -- but he's an awesome wrestler. He's the best I know at mixing technique with down-and-out dirty fighting. But I'm the man, it's as simple as that. I can beat anyone, on my best day, I really believe that I am the best in this business today. So can I beat Drek Stone? Yeah. Will I? (smirking) Oh, hell yeah. J-MATH (laughing) Well, that's a great attitude to have. A lot of people wonder how you manage to stay so upbeat lately, with your conflict with Chris Stevens and all... HOFF Well, that's been an ongoing thing for years, and it's something I've learned to deal with. It's seemingly an inevitabiliy that wherever I go, Chris will be there, and so I learn to live with that. As for my mood, people don't really know it, but I'm a pretty uptempo guy. People see me and see what I do and that I do like to rough people up a bit (smiling), and they think that "hey, he's a mean guy, he's an ass," but it's really not true. I love what I do and I get a chance to do it for some great fans. A while back...I think it was October, right before I won my title, I said that I just wanted to compete. I get to, and it's like living a dream. It helps that right now, all the cards are falling into place, and hopefully I'll be able to get my title back. J-MATH I notice you keep calling it "your title." Some people have taken to calling you the "uncrowned champion" of the OAOAST. Is this something you've taken to heart? HOFF It is and it isn't. I do feel it's a sort of rallying cry for me. It's a reminder of where I was. The fact is, I was never beaten for the belt. I never lost it in the ring. It was taken from me. Do I feel like I deserve it? Yeah! But, at the same time, I want to earn it in the ring. That's what being a champion is all about. That brings me back again to Drek. Love him or hate him -- and put me in with the latter -- but he's paid his dues. Too bad for him the title's coming back where it belongs on February 27th. J-MATH What do you think about Chris Stevens' comments, how you'll never hold the World Championship again? HOFF (rolling his eyes) Chris Stevens loves to blow smoke. He says he's not a big talker, but he whines more than anybody in this industry. Chris can't stop me from winning that title anymore than he could beat me on Sunday. J-MATH Congratulations on your win, by the way. HOFF Thank you. J-MATH Yeah. I don't know if you're aware, but the match has gotten a lot of praise. HOFF Well, as much as I hate to admit it, Chris Stevens is a hell of an athlete too. I knew it'd be tough to beat him. It was back and forth, but the fans were into it, they were totally on my side, and I kind of knew they'd love it. It was a different type of cage match than most, very quick, very sudden. It was all about who could knock who out first. Chris Stevens found out the hard way that you don't keep Hoff down for long. J-MATH Speaking of Anglepalooza, let's switch gears. What did you think when you saw Axel win the Lethal Rumble? Were you jealous? HOFF You know, of course I was a little jealous, because everybody wants to win that spot, everyone wants to main event Anglemania. It's the biggest event in the biz, and it's just a great night. You know, I remember my own experience last year, facing CWM at Anglemania III. It was a great experience, and I'll never forget that feel. But to main event...to be the showcase...that's everyone's dream. J-MATH Sounds like a bit of dreaming going on on your part. HOFF (laughing) Well, if I told you I'd never dreamed of it, you wouldn't believe me. I think we all do. But, no, to get back to your original question, was I jealous? No, not really. Besides wanting to be there -- wanting that spotlight -- it really didn't faze me. I was actually happy for Axel, y'know? I mean, he and I have definitely been at each other's throats, but the guy's overcome a lot to get where he is, and he's very good at what he does, and I respect that. J-MATH It looked like the beginning of a friendship was formed tonight. HOFF (smiling) Who knows, maybe it was. I dunno, I never came in here to make friends, but it doesn't hurt. Axel's a solid guy, and a good person to have in your corner. The man can fight, no question. No question. J-MATH Well, hopefully, he'll be a good man to have in your corner next week in that six-man tag. HOFF I can't wait for that match. J-MATH What about Crystal? Is there any animosity there? HOFF Well, if there is, I'm not detecting it. She and I haven't really spoken much since World Without End, but I know that she respects me and I her. She's truly earned the "Female Phenom" nickname. I look forward to teaming with her next week, and hopefully we'll get a chance to talk before then. J-MATH All right, Hoff, I'll let you get going, but one last quick question: who throws a better spinebuster, you or Axel? HOFF (smirking) You better get out of here before Tony Brannigan hears you talking like that. Josh immediately looks frantically to either side, then ssprings out of his chair and runs off. Hoff smiles, shaking his head, and stands, picking up his duffelbag and walking off. *cut to Savage in the Control Center* SAVAGE OOOOOOOOH YEAH DIG IT!! THERE YOU HAVE IT!! I CAN'T WAIT FOR THAT SIX-MAN TAG NEXT WEEK, OOOOOOOOOOOH UYEEEEEEEAHHH~! WE'LL SEE YOU THEN, BROTHER! *fade out* © 2005 OAOAST Entertainment, Inc.

Hoff has t'ings to say.

Very cool.

Hey, I like to think that I usually do a good job, when I remember to do it. Bastard. *does not pursue*

I wanted to leave feedback before AP but I'm really just feeling so, so lazy right now. Rest assured it was a good show. Papa's women's match rocked. I mean the rest was good too, but that was my favorite part. Hey, I'm half-assing it this week, step off.

PK: No. No, they don't.

You're still here, PK. You must be a bored man.

I dont' have a lullaby. I have a cage match... Speaking of which, scroll down a bit and check out the OAOAST's big PPV tomorrow night.

I *told* you that I hoped you didn't like Jumbo. I mean I know that you DID, but, well, sucks to be you, I guess. HA! More later.

Fallout from Hoff/Stevens IN THE CAGE~. Someone will have an announcement.

There's still at least one and I think a few segs to be edited in this week, including one featuring our World Champion. So, keep checking. Also, I'll wait for a bit to start feedback and next week's booking threads due to that. In all fairness, as NYU said, "who knew I'd post the show ontime."

HeldDOWN is presented by OAOAST Entertainment. *^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^* OAOAST HeldDOWN~! We hear LaLa and now’s a good time for ME to point out that I never liked that song. Could a change be in store? Whoops, no time to think about that, here comes the LOGO... WHOOSH~ it goes!! Fireworks set off as we cut to the live crowd!! COLE Welcome, everyone, to HELDDOWN~!~!~!!! COACH AWWWWW YEAH-UH~! CABOOSE Right-o. COLE This week is gonna be action packed! COACH Like the Action Zone? COLE EVEN BIGGER!!! We got MAD HELLA TAG ACTION, as we'll see the New New Midnight Express take on the Frankenstieners, and the Saints and the Love Doctors-- CABOOSE The LUUUURRRVE Doctors-- COLE --will be in action as well! We've also got our newest, funkiest superstar, That 70's Guy-- COACH T70G, BOO-YAH~! COLE --in the ring! Plus women's interpromotional action, and MUCH MORE!! COACH MORE?! COLE MORE!!!! COACH MORE?!?!? COLE MORE!!!!!!!! CABOOSE Dear, GOD, help us all! Can we deal with that much more? COLE I don't think so! I'm gonna go get a soda!! CABOOSE Sod-- hey, wait! Get back here!! Cole flees the scene as Caboose calls out after him. CABOOSE Bloody hell. COACH Well, we-- Coach is cut short by Sevendust's "Black" as the fans get to their feet!!! COACH Oh, SNAP. That sucks. Mikey must have known what was coming. CABOOSE You ARE the perfect fall guy. COACH Dumb as a post, twice as hard! CABOOSE Gross. BOOM*BOOM*BOOM*BOOOOOOOOOOOM~!~!~! Pyrotechnics EXPLODE as Hoff steps out of the curtain and onto the stage! The fans give Hoff one hell of a standing O as the big man looks out among the cheering people, his face serious. COACH Hoff, in three days, will meet Chris Stevens in a steel cage match, and that should be one hell of a fight. CABOOSE Bollocks. I don't like Hoff anymore. COACH He put you in the will? CABOOSE He BETTER. He has an X-Box, I NEED AN X-BOX!!!! COACH DAYUM~! You don't have the X?! Sucka. CABOOSE You don't have the Y, as in the chromosome. COACH Huh? CABOOSE Never mind, simpleton. COACH Your jokes suck. PUNK'D~! CABOOSE Ugh. By this time, Hoff has already made his way to the ring amidst all the "clever" banter. He slides in under the bottom rope, quickly scaling the nearest turnbuckles, posing on the second rope. Hoff throws one arm into the air, letting out a primal yell that drives the crowd into a frenzy! COACH Man, Hoff has got these people in the palm of his hand. CABOOSE Sad but true. Hoff hops off the buckle, and grabs a mic from ringside. HOFF Now.... "HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF" Hoff smiles, shaking his head, then looking out at the crowd and nodding, drawing a big cheer. HOFF Now...if I could call out an old friend of mine. Chris, you-- CUE: "Bound for the Floor" The fans turn irate as Chris Stevens' music kicks in. The boos are deafening as the man himself steps onto the stage. Dressed impeccably, holding a mic, Stevens smirks with a hint of disdain at the smiling Hoff. COACH Stevens wasting no time meeting Hoff's call! CABOOSE He's a man's man, Coach, something you'd know nothing about. COACH Yeah, and something you WOULD!! SNAP!! GHEY'D~! CABOOSE I am so hanging myself later. COACH Cool! Stevens looks at the crowd, nodding with a sneer as they boo him out of the building. The boos finally die down, and Hoff continues. HOFF Chris. Chris Stevens. The man who would see me broken. "BOOOOO!!!!" Stevens nods slowly, his smirk fading. HOFF Well, take a good look, Chris. You saw it last week, you're seeing it tonight. I am far from broken. "YEEEEEEEAAH!!!!" Stevens rolls his eyes and scoffs. COACH Folks, last week Hoff absolutely DESTROYED Stevens' bodyguard Jumbo! HOFF You know it...these people know it...and your pal Jumbo damn sure knows it. I am alive and kicking. "HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF HOFF" HOFF And buddy, you're going to regret that fact in three days, at Anglepalooza, when I have you locked inside of a steel cage. "YEEEEEAH!!!" Stevens blanches ever so slightly, but he retains his composure, pursing his lips and sneering at the big man. HOFF No? You're not scared, Chris? Stevens shakes his head, then raises his own microphone. STEVENS Hoff....why in the hell would I be scared of you? "BOOOOOOO" Hoff raises an eyebrow at this. STEVENS Listen, big man. You came back and you got all these fans poppin' for you, but it's time to face facts. You were always B-team. Zack Malibu and Calvin Szechstein carried your ass for months. You were never, ever good enough to make it on your own. You went from me carrying your ass, to them. It's really pretty sad, big boy. But the truth often is. Hoff's jaw sets as Stevens spins his yarn. STEVENS No, you don't like hearing it, do you, Hoff? But I haven't even gotten to the best part yet. Let me continue. You won yourself a world title. Yippee. Congratulations, man! Hey, I have an idea. You should have gone home and put it in with all the other titles you never deserves. The fans "oooooh" the burn. COACH SNAP~! Hoff's eyes narrow at the remark. STEVENS Oh, but I'm not done, Hoff. Fortunately, I was able to right the wrong of Hoff as World Champion, but sadly, the help I hired wasn't able to get the job done. For what it's worth, Jumbo's services have been terminated. And good job, by the way, on your win last week. You beat a second-rate lackey. Your parents must be very proud. "BOOOOOOO" STEVENS But let's get to the kicker, Hoff. Let's get to it. The bare facts. Fact number one: you have never, ever won a steel cage match. Not here, not in Japan, not even in Minnesota. Never. You know this, and you also know this is true: I have. "BOOOOOOOO" COACH Is that true? CABOOSE Well, Stevens wouldn't lie! STEVENS Fact number two. You have severe ligament damage in your knee. I know, because I bribed your doctor. Don't think you can hide from me, Hoff. I'm smarter than you'll ever be. COACH Is THAT true? CABOOSE Hoff doesn't seem to be denying it!! STEVENS Now you can lie to yourself all you want to. but I'm gonna tear your knee right off your leg if I have to. Anyway, let's get to fact number three. My favorite fact. You have never...ever...ever beaten me. HOFF WHAT?! STEVENS Shut your mouth, for a second. Not one-on-one, not without cheating, and never when it mattered. Look at this year. I took your 24/7 title. I beat you at Dirty Deeds. Every time we get together, I come out on top. So let me ask you, Hoff: what the hell makes you think this time will be any different? Come on, Hoff, let me have it: just HOW are you gonna beat me? The fans boo as Stevens finishes his thoughts. He smiles a thin, sick smile at Hoff, who lowers his head, scratching his goatee, before looking back up. HOFF Chris...everything you just said might be true. But if it is true, then when I was riding Zack and Cal's jocks, they taught me one thing: how to look into someone's eyes. How to tell what someone was thinking just by the expression on their face. Chris, I'm looking you right in the eye, and you know what I see? Fear. "YEEEEEEAH!!!!" HOFF See, for the first time in my life, the great and powerful Chris Stevens is afraid of me. Chris, you and I both know you're a great wrestler. One of the best. And we both know, on your best day and my best day, we might never be able to beat one another. But you made one mistake, Chris, and that is that you pissed me off. And if you think I'm pissed now, Chris, then you just WAIT until Sunday. Because, brother, I am saving it all up inside of me. I haven't hit you, taken a swing at you, even let myself get frustrated by you, because I want to let it all out at once. And when I do let it out, when I get through with you, there might not be anything left. The fans are BALLISTIC at Hoff's words. Stevens' eyes are wide as saucers, and his face is completely white. The cameras cut back to Hoff, who nods. HOFF I see that fear. And let me tell you, you better be afraid. The crowd cheers-- then cheers even more as Hoff gets out of the ring! Hoff hops off the apron and Stevens, like a deer in headlights, freezes. Hoff walks down the ramp, until he's right next to Stevens. Stevens looks right into Hoff's narrow eyes. HOFF Until Sunday, old friend. Until then. "Black" plays as Hoff smiles and walks away. Stevens, finally out of his spell, shakes the cobwebs out, and quickly heads to the back. COACH WOW! Hoff is in the HEAD of Stevens!! CABOOSE I give you this, it's the smartest he's ever been. COLE (coming back) Hey, how was it? COACH You punk'd me! COLE Yes, yes I did. COACH NOICE! CABOOSE ...anyway. Hoff appears to be focused heading into Sunday! Will Stevens be able to pull off the not-at-all-an-upset win?! We'll see! *cut to commercial*