Hoff

*hopes your damn money keeps you warm at night, asshole*

*RISES FROM THE DEAD LIKE PHOENIX OMG TAKE THAT BANNED GUY!!!!*

*crazy oversells, bleeds like 18 gallons, dies*

*doesn't sign on AIM before you even ask because he has to work in like five hours, get a job, hippie*

*just stands around and waits for Axel to take title back. Er, I mean...does NOT do that. No, no no no. Um...uh....*

*tells fans that this is indeed not sing-along with them*

*just awards self the OAOAST title*

*spins around, then does the HBK muscle pose*

*gives Axel the "U Can't See Me" hand gesture*

*Van Daminators title into Axel's face*

This was a really fun show. I like the promo-heavy ones just as much as the match-heavy ones, so I'm cool. Strong, forceful promo from the new champ, and a bit of a new attitude for Axel as well. I like it, although I HATE the new theme...sorry, mate. Killings got owned. That kid came to see the Future, not some sorry ass actor. You'll note I capitalized "Future" because OMG HOFF = TEH FUTURE. Cute little promo from the Heavenly Rockers. Zack and SG vs. the Hitmen was a tight little match, and I liked the explanation beforehand...it's the little things. Tony was INTENSEZONE~! I liked it. Sweet promo. His partner was a ramblin' man and I liked that too, very dark, living up to the "Ice Heart" moniker. OMG HOFF IS TEH BEST EVAR....seriously, I'm probably looking forward to the Crystal program as much as anyone, and that's a shoot, brotha. The Docs said what they needed to say. The Dude is a great interview, and I think "collection of hits" in reference to his victims is too perfect. And by that I mean the right amount of perfect. But good anyway. TIGHT first defense for the Champ, and it made Tony look good as well. Everyone decries nonfinishes but it worked here, and set up what should be another great match. I hope I'm not too taking it too far with the "Hoff is on roids" jokes. I was STUNNED by the Krista and Ned development. Good stuff, really. CWM's promo was...well, intense. And then the end....well. No more needs to be said. So yeah good show, go buy your Hoff t-shirts online.

RICARDO MONTANA IN THE HOUSE!!

The America Airlines Arena, home of the Miami Heat.

Dude, seriously, what the fuck. I wish you could all hear this. It's pissing me off.

I think there's a werewolf outside my window. *gives werewolf the Future Shock*

Next time we'll do a capital T to show him we REALLY mean business!

Wait, Patty, did you post the year as "show?" As in, the date being 4/14/show? Because that's not so much a number. Anyway. Hoff vs. Gunner obviously, plus Josh or Jackie (flip a coin) will catch up with Hoff to get his thoughts on the upcoming #1 contender's match at LA. ALSO! I didn't do it, but someone else did something cool and that will air on this week's HeldDOWN! Is the suspense killing you yet? ALSO!! If I have the time, we may hear from a certain Ricardo Montana.

DON'T you? None of us have ever SEEN you at these "jobs" you speak of...and you're a well-known introverted sociopath. I say Malibu is stringing us along. The heartless bastard, let's kill him.

God, I wish I *was* drunk last night, at least I'd have an excuse. Eating the sex ham?! Christ.

Tongiht sucks now. Sorry if I made anyone mad. I'm going the fuck to bed.

I'm not drunk, I'm tired and basically posting stream of conciousness

Give my regards to Bill Pontiac. *dives onto a million and one tables*

It's a beautiflu day. I bet ANgle's was to Coldplay because US is H's badn because they're secretly Motorhead.

You guys are mean, we're just funnin'. I can't detect sarcasm right now if my life depended on it.

That's just mean!