Zack Malibu

There could be something from the backstage stuff that we didn't see, although I highly doubt they'd debut any former champions in a backstage skit (unless it's in a hype package deal). The Doomsday cage match doesn't sound overbooked...it's a barbed wire cage match. Should also be eons better than the lame one that JBL and Big Show had 2 1/2 years ago. Anyone read the more specific spoilers? The ones at WO said that in hour 2 Cornette comes out with Matt Morgan, but that's the only mention of him.

The OVW now is a far cry from the glory days of '02-early '06. The Heyman era was especially fun because he was booking without the chains on him, and in true Heyman fashion found a way to accentuate everyone's positives. It wasn't until the office told him to get everyone into the roles they decided upon (Spirit Squad guys, Deuce and Domino, etc.) that things started looking sloppy. I haven't been impressed with OVW as a whole in quite some time. Sure, guys like Burchill, Cody Rhodes (and his angle with Spears is one of the lone highlights these days), and the James Boys work for me, but it's a night and day scenario with the OVW of yesteryear. I highly recommend seeking out some of that past footage (and '05-April of '06, which includes the Heyman booking term is all on DVD, not VHS).

I don't think they'd hype Banderas as the former World Champion, since the Mitchell protege deal is a)made out to be a mystery "who's he got now" deal, and b)he won't be Ricky Banderas, so I don't know if they'll refer to him as such.

Likely a special referee scenario like the aforementioned Tyson deal. At least they appear to be trying something that's worked before. Let's just hope that whatever rub they get from this goes to someone deserving of it, and isn't wasted on someone like Lance Hoyt again.

While the timing is ridiculously bad to pull a stunt like this, I don't find it to be any different from WWF/E bringing in Mike Tyson after all he did.

There's a local RI/MA fed called the NEWA which is pretty much a glorified backyard fed. A good portion of the guys are just local average joes who got together, got a ring, and taped shows for public access. At one show they did in my high school gym (this was my freshman year, so '94), they used a local little league coach and his best friend (a custodian in the school department) as "special referees" for a grudge match between a recently broken up tag team. Ref Coach made the count for the heel, which Ref Janitor couldn't believe, and it was supposedly to build up a feud for the next high school show. Not sure if they ever went through with that one. The same fed also ran a show at a local stadium (not huge, but a small local football/baseball stadium) that was supposed to have Warlord vs. Sid Vicious as the main event (this was in '94 also). It wound up being Warlord vs. New England's favorite Jacques Rougeau ripoff Pierrer the Mountie, who was a job match guy in the WWF as Ray Roy or Roy Raymond. According to him though, he's The Mountie from the WWF, and he's not shy about telling you so. Very select few people from there ever went on to anything, although two of the younger guys there, Kid Liberty and Iron Fist, went on to become The Damned in Northeast indies (most notably working for Steve Corino's old fed). Another guy, Gorgeous Gino Giovanni, who was a skinny kid who looked more like a waiter in his tuxedo ring garb, also worked for Corino some.

I KNEW that was you outside the bathroom window!

Yeah I know, but I run into it often enough that it warrants mentioning. Checking out the Express site, it seems like it's just an expensive version of what you could find at a Mexx or Pinstripes or something similar. I'm not familiar with either of the stores you mentioned. Like VX said, Express is more of a preppy/metro store, however if you hit them on the right day, you can walk off with some good stuff. Their solid colored button downs (dubbed 1MX shirts) are a really nice fit, great quality, and are seemingly once a month knocked down to $19.50 or so. Same with the jeans...they're comfortable, and on sale you can get them around $30. Paying full price in that store is ridiculous though, because I could get a whole 'nother outfit or two elsewhere rather than pay $80 for a track jacket or $60 for a dress shirt. They recently had a "box sale" (end of the season clearance, things marked up to 70% off) and I got a nice polo shirt that was originally $50 for $10. As far as T-shirts go, I'm notorious for wearing some random shirts/band tees and whatnot, but the most comfortable T-shirts I own all come from Hollister. They're not supertight, but they're not baggy either, at least for my size. As for outlet malls, we have one about a half an hour/45 minute drive up in Wrentham, MA. The name-brand stores don't tend to offer a lot (most of the "super sales" are what you'd find on a normal department store/mall store sale), but some of the lesser known stores offer great discounts. There's one store called Rue 21 which has a good guys selection (it's more of a casual/skate/surf/ selection), and you can get stuff like jeans for $5 if you hit them at the right time.

Now with the trash-talking out of the way, Malibu and Vitamin X lock up, with Malibu grabbing a quick headlock. He holds onto it, but the move hasn't been applied for more than three seconds when... "REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH!" ...LANDON MADDIX, the OAOAST World Champion (like it or not), makes his presence felt. Briefly distracted, Malibu winds up taken off his feet by Vitamin X, but floats over his back and then runs the ropes. X drops to the mat as Malibu hops over him and then slides out of the ring, storming up the aisle to confront Maddix! COLE OK, who had "under a minute" in the "all hell will break loose" pool? COACH We had a pool goin' and no one told me? Haters. Referee Robinson darts out of the ring as well, trying to lure Malibu back inside the ring, while Maddix keeps his distance from the irate former World Champion. Tha Puerto Rican comes around ringside now and he gets involved, bitching out Maddix for sticking his nose in Lightning Crew affairs. COLE This is not going to end well for at least one, if not all three of these men tonight! Robinson now has his hands full, ordering PRL back to the opposite side of the ringside area, and Malibu back into the ring. It's tough for the diminutive referee to impose order when the three participants in the AngleSlam main event are shouting each other down, so HeldDOWN~! quickly cuts to break so that he can restore order! (COMMERCIAL BREAK) HeldDOWN~! returns, and the action had already started, as we see Vitamin X working over the arm of Zack Malibu. X wrenches the arm, then follows up with a chop before releasing his grip. Circling Malibu, he peppers him with some quick jabs, backing off quickly after each one connects. With Malibu stunned, X hits the ropes and hits a leaping clothesline, taking Malibu down! He follows up with a cover, and PRL pounds the apron, cheering his protege on. ONE! KICKOUT! COLE Easy escape for Malibu that time, but Vitamin X has been able to control this match since Robinson managed to get Zack back into the ring. X picks Zack up and looks to shoot him to the corner, but Malibu reverses mid-move. X can't stop his momentum, so he leaps off the canvas and onto the middle rope, leaping backwards back to the mat. Surprised that Malibu hadn't charged the corner after him, X turns around...and gets blasted with a hard running lariat from the former World Champion! Malibu then leads X to his feet, and unloads on him with hard slaps, then segues into chops, striking the Prince of the Lightning Crew as hard as he sees fit! Zack then takes X by the head and pulls him towards a European uppercut, and then puts him on the mat with a scoop slam. Zack then hits the ropes, but PRL reaches in and grabs his ankle, tripping him up! Robinson rushes over, scolding Tha Puerto Rican for his actions, but Malibu decides to take matters in his own hand, launching himself over the top rope...and faking PRL out! Zack doesn't hit a pescado, but instead slingshot his way onto the apron, then leaps onto the top rope and sails in with a springboard legdrop onto Vitamin X! ONE! TW-KICKOUT! PRL applauds the effort of his stablemate, as X gets a shoulder up at 2. Zack brings him up again, but a quick rake of the eye puts the ball back in X's court, and he uses a rear waistlock takedown to put Zack back on the canvas! X then climbs onto Zack's back and slaps the back of his head playfully, then gets up and charges the ropes and delivers a basement dropkick to the chin of the Preppy One as he tries pushing up! X then puts the boots to Zack, stomping away, and then puts an exclamation point on the beating by dropping an elbow on his opponent, then goes for the cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! COLE Vitamin X is staying on his game, and Tha Puerto Rican has to be happy with what he's seen so far! COACH Don't forget about DA CHAMP~! here at ringside either. Maddix is all smiles as well, actively cheering on Vitamin X despite the tension between himself and the Lightning Crew leader. As both men come up, X staggers Zack with some forearms, then throws him into the corner! X unloads some more kicks to the ribs, then backs off, moving towards the opposite corner. X chugs like a choo-choo train, getting a full head of steam as he races towards the opposing corner, and...MISSES! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" X stumbles back, clutching at his ribs, but Malibu shoves him forward, and again he's slammed sternum first into the turnbuckles! Zack then leads him to center ring and hits a kick to the gut, then places him in a standing headscissors, hoisting him up for a powerbomb which X somehow reverses! PRL's feet leave the ground as he jumps with excitement, supporting X's attempt to decimate the number one contender. Malibu gets up quickly from the rana attempt, and is met with a quick jab, and another, and another, before X gets too cocky and does a little dance. He takes a swing for the closing haymaker shot, but Malibu ducks it, and now X is in trouble, as he gets rocked with a German Suplex! COACH Uh oh! COLE This is not where Vitamin X wants to be, that's for sure! The first German hits. So does the second German. As well as the third. And the fourth. AND the fifth, as the crowd is eating this up, counting along every time the back of Vitamin X's head slams into the canvas! COLE It's traditional, yet relentless. The Rolling Suplexes, passed on from Anglesault to his successor, has Vitamin X in a bad way. So much for calling Zack a hack! Malibu pulls VX up for a sixth suplex, but Tha Puerto Rican leaps up onto the apron, protesting what's happening to his charge. Robinson goes to cut him off from entering the ring, and when Malibu goes for the sixth in the series of suplexes, Maddix slides into the ring and delivers a low blow, causing both Zack and Vitamin X to collapse to the mat! COACH Look like Malibu's ship has sailed after that shot to the dingy! Maddix turns and smiles to the crowd, leaning on the ropes with a look of pride beaming off his face. PRL continues to keep Robinson tied up now, as Landon reaches down and picks the World Title off the apron. COLE PRL's serving as a distraction for Maddix! Can you believe this! They're both looking to eliminate Zack Malibu from title contention! Landon clutches the belt in his hands, waiting quietly to blast Malibu with the sixteen pounds of gold that once sat around his waist. Zack comes up off the mat, aching from the nutshot, when Landon comes forward with a BELTSHOT~!... ...that nails VITAMIN X SMACK IN THE FACE~! COACH YO~! COLE Malibu ducked! Vitamin X just got nailed with the World Heavyweight Title! Maddix backs off, and when Malibu lunges for him he quickly drops and rolls out of the ring, while PRL chases after him. Maddix backs up the aisleway, and sarcastically shrugs, looking as carefree as can be after nailing Vitamin X with his championship! Tha Puerto Rican fumes, calling Landon back out, but as Landon vanishes up the ramp, Malibu takes advantage of Landon's mishap (or was it?) and covers. ONE! TWO! THREE! DING! DING! DING! COLE It's not exactly the way we're used to seeing Zack win matches, but if anything, a clear message was sent tonight! COACH Yeah, the message PRL just gave to Maddix was loud and clear. He told him to go f... COLE ...FIND some backup, because the Lightning Crew are gonna be looking for him! COACH No, he told him to go f... COLE ...FORGET about their deal because PRL's done trying to work with him! COACH NO, Mikey! He told him to go fu... COLE ...FUDGEPACK his Lightning Crew boyfriends! COACH NO. Ew, no. What's wrong with you, Mikey! COLE I'm covering your ass! COACH After that last comment you just made, PLEASE stay away from my ass! Malibu, not looking too happy with how things went down, stands tall as Robinson raises his hand. Tha Puerto Rican, disturbed by Malibu's win, rolls into the ring, and now the two challengers for Maddix's World Title are face to face in the ring. PRL mouths off to Zack, with the words "it ain't over" being heard softly on TV broadcasts worldwide. Malibu responds with "I don't want it to be", and then delivers a hard slap across PRL's face, causing the Lightning Crew leader to take him to the mat, where they start to brawl! COLE It's breaking down again out here! We need some assistance out here to get these guys apart! Zack and PRL have barely started trading shots when the locker room empties, pulling both men apart and in opposite directions. The rest of the Lightning Crew come out and make the save for their leader, helping him out of the ring to try and lure him back to the locker room...but Malibu breaks free from those holding him back, and runs across the ring, leaping clean over the ring ropes and crashing down on the entire Lightning Crew with a plancha! COACH DAMN~! COLE Air Malibu has just crash landed, and it's wiped out The Lightning Crew! There's no end to this war in sight, but for tonight, we've gotta go! We'll see you next week on HeldDOWN~!

JOSH Ladies and gentlemen, right now it's my pleasure to bring in the number one contender to the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title, Zack Malibu! The distant sound of a crowd pop is heard, as Malibu steps into the shot, next to his old buddy J. Math. JOSH Zack, last week you stormed onto the scene during the contract signing once Anglesault revealed that you were due your rightful rematch against Landon Maddix. Now that the Angleslam main event has officially been made into a three way dance, what are your thoughts on the subject? MALIBU It's twofold, Josh. First off, I get a chance, inside Madison Square Garden no less, to recapture the World Title and gain a measure of revenge on Landon Maddix. Secondly, it gives me a chance to eliminate another problem within the OAOAST, The Lightning Crew. See, I know what it's like to be a target. Having earned my reputation by fighting my way to the top, having been the World Heavyweight Champion, I know what it's like when someone tries to make a name for themselves at your expense. Tha Puerto Rican and The Lightning Crew seemed to think lately that they could get a rub from coming after me, and Landon? Landon, I'll give you some credit...you took advantage of a situation you were rightfully entitled too, BUT, when it comes to face to face challenges, your spine melts. When you don't have Todd Cortez or The South Central Millitia or whoever else you suck up to on a given week, you back down. You and PRL, you both surround yourselves with these allies, these "friends" of yours, when the truth is that the both of you back yourselves into a corner so often that you need them to help pull you out. At Angleslam, I know the odds are against me. I know I'm up against two of the most hated men on the roster. I know I'm up against two men that want to take me out and get the credit for it. I know that my Angleslam track record isn't the greatest. I also know that I'm not treating this as just a shot at the title, oh no. This is redemption for Zack Malibu. This is about reclaiming the World Title, and gaining, by FORCE, the respect of two men who show an incredible lack of it. Landon, you should have learned from your old friend Bruce Blank what it means to go to the lengths that you did...because if I came back after the hell that man put me through, did you think some cracked ribs would make me fear you? Puerto Rican, did you think that by making your lackeys do some dirty work that it'd make me fear you any more? If anything, I respect you even less, because you hide behind the army you created, yet reap the benefits. You're hardly a leader, and Landon Maddix, you're hardly a champion. Come Angleslam, if not sooner, the cold hard truth is gonna come and smack you both in the face, likely in the form of my size 11 boot, get me? JOSH Sounds like you're prepared to make a statement at Angleslam, Zack. Tonight though, it seems that Tha Puerto Rican hopes to cut you off at the pass, because you're facing one of his closest allies in Vitamin X, a man who holds victories over some of your fellow OAOAST Originals. MALIBU That's exactly what I'm talking about, Josh. Tha Puerto Rican and Landon Maddix think they have this endless supply of curveballs they can throw my way. I'll take on Vitamin X tonight, then probably Cuban Wall next week, and Todd Cortez the week after that...I wouldn't be surprised if Landon has Megan get in the ring with me! The fact of the matter is this, and it's what I've been saying my whole career...I WELCOME these obstacles. Vitamin X wants me in the ring tonight, he's got me. Anyone else wants to take a shot, so be it. I've been a moving target for the past five years, so if PRL or Maddix think this is something new, they're sorely mistaken. Until there isn't a breath left in this body, I'm gonna keep coming at them. Matthews looks slightly concerned, yet impressed at Malibu's brutal honesty. Malibu then gives his old running buddy a pat on the shoulder and walks off, leaving the audience (and his two upcoming opponents) to let his words sink in.

I don't think Alf holds the distinction of being our lowest drawing champion anymore .

COLE Right now, let's take you up to the ring and our master of ceremonies for the evening, the incomporable Mene Gene Okerlund! We cut to the ring which has been lined with a lavish red carpet during our last time-out. After all, this is a formal event and what would a format event (in professional wrestling) be without a red carpet. An official looking figure stands at the head of the table set up in the ring, while at the foot stands the forementioned "Mene" Gene with microphone in hand. OKERLUND Ladies and gentlemen, we are just about ready for the official contract signing for your main-event at AngleSlam 2007, eminating from Madison Square Garden! A respectful round of applause just about drowns out some scattered boos. OKERLUND Mark the date down on your calenders, August 26th in New York City, the sixth annual edition of AngleSlam. And headlining, a battle between two 'controversial' OAOAST superstars. One of it's newest taking on a true veteran of this ring. It promises to be an intriguing match-up for sure. And we're going to sign on the dotted line right here, right now here in Atlanta! Up goes a cheap pop, Gene redeeming his earlier New York references. OKERLUND So without further ado, let's get our champion and our challenger out here. It is my pleasure to introduce you first to the challenger come August 26th. A man who's name is synonimous with the OAOAST and has been for the past four plus years. But, he is a man who has never captured the golden ring, the World Heavyweight Championship. And he would love nothing more than to do so in a setting such as Madison Square Garden. He is the man cashing in his Golden Contract with that hope in mind, please welcome "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION"... he is PUERTO RICAN LLLIIIGHTNING!!! The lights go down in the arena. The crowd instantly start buzzing, probably just pleased that the unexpected blackout has stopped the World Champion's singing. But after a few seconds the fans aren't quite so cheery, as Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them: *THE CHAMP IS HERE!* With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and "Know Your Role '99" begins playing, with the crowd standing up and booing. The entrance doors slide open and out come "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican, his girlfriend and Women's Champion Ms. Lindsay Gonzale and his manager and "Career Consultant" Stephen Joseph Popick! The crowd boos away as PRL holds his black briefcase spray-painted with L.C. in yellow high, which of course contains his Golden Contract inside. COLE Well, there is the challenger. We saw last week, PRL crashed the party of our new World Champion... turn about fair play perhaps, as if not for the interventions of Todd Cortez and The South Central Militia, PRL might have beaten Maddix to the punch in cashing in his contract on Zack Malibu. COACH Might have? Boricua and Vitamin X hit the ring first, they had Zack right where PR wanted him. If Landon hadn't had the same idea and the same type of opportunity with his contract, that man on the way to the ring would finally have won the OAOAST World Title that's eluded him for so long. COLE And look at this, no Lightning Crew. Popick obviously ever-present and Lindsay... COACH Miss Lindsay. COLE Yeah yeah. But no Boricua, no Wall, no Vitamin X. That's a good sign. PRL, Lindsay and Popick enter the ring and PRL again raises his briefcase in the air. The trio then breeze past Okerlund to take their places, eager to get the formalities over with. A microphone sit among the papers and Tha Puerto Rican typically notes it, ignoring the contract itself. OKERLUND And now ladies and gentlemen, let's bring out the other half of our main-event. He is the new OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion, a man with a laundry list of accolades in this business that few others can compare with. But come AngleSlam, he will be making his first PPV defence of the OAOAST World Title... quite possibly his first defence, period. Right now, let's hear it for the One And Only AngleSault Thread Heavyweight Champion of the World... "LA CUCARACHA"... LANDON MMMMMMMADDIX!!!! "REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH!" "Personal Jesus" by Marilyn Manson hits, as from behind the entrance doors comes Todd Cortez. Of course, he's just leading the way (rather far out ahead mind you) for Megan Skye, who heralds the arrival of Landon Maddix. Landon stops at the top of the ramp and adjusts the title sitting over his left shoulder, grinning away like a chesire cat as he shrugs, as if to say "yep, I know I'm great". COLE Landon, also looking a little light in the entourage stakes. We saw earlier what happened with The South Central Militia, he's lucky PRL didn't bring his entire back-up with him. COACH Nevermind that Cole. Come on, this is the WORLD CHAMPION! Is that the best intro you can give? COLE Well he is the World Champion. And he's just under seven weeks away from his first date with destiny, AngleSlam 2007. Landon leaps to the apron, looking out at the crowd as Megan climbs the steps. Megan holds open the ropes and Landon bounds into the ring, spinning himself into the centre of the ring HBK style and posing with Megan. PRL, Popick, Lindsay and even Todd watch on pretty unanimously unimpressed as Landon finally stops with the posing and goes to take his seat. OKERLUND Now gentlemen, before... Going to put his belt down, Landon notices the eager look on Tha Puerto Rican's face and thinks twice. He positions Cortez at his side before sitting down, setting the belt on his shoulder, right in PRL's eyeline. OKERLUND ...before we go any further, do any of you have any questions. Talk about waving a red rag at a bull. Quick as a flash, both men go for the mic. After a brief tussle over it, Landon manages to snatch it away, to muttered curses from PR. MADDIX I don't have any questions, but I've got something I'd like to say. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" MADDIX First and foremost, it's Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix. It's like Oreo filling, if it's not in the middle, it's just not right. And secondly, I just want to make one thing clear. Gene, you said something about this being my first Pay Per View OAOAST World Title defence at AngleSlam and you may be right. But this won't be my first rodeo, so to speak. I've done it all a dozen times in the past. I've main-evented countless SWF PPVs, often as the defending World Champion. Of course, I needn't remind people I am the only man to have won both the SWF and the OAOAST's World Championships. The point is, nobody... especially YOU, 'PRL', should be worried about yours truly getting stage-fright in the Garden. Landon points the finger right down the barrel of PRL's eyeline. MADDIX You and I have one thing in common, neither of us have defended this belt before. The difference is, I've been a World Champion. I've been there, I've done that and I'm doing it yet again. If anything, everybody should be worried about you CHOKING yet again with the big gold on the line! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE And the gloves are off early! Looking up at Popick, PRL is fuming. Quickly, Popick demands that Gene Okerlund hand him his microphone, which immediately finds it's way into PRL's hand. PRL First of all, you should know your role... and SHUT your MOUTH! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Not impressed, Landon makes a 'yawning' motion with his hand, lounging back in his seat. PRL Who in the hell do you think you are, to come into the OAOAST, the promotion that Tha Puerto Rican built and to run your mouth at me!? Who!? Let me tell you something buddy, I couldn't give a flying CRAP about what you've done in the SWF, the XWF, the WWF, wherever the hell you've been! You are in Tha Puerto Rican's yard now! I have left more blood, sweat and tears... tears of joy... in an OAOAST ring than you could ever hope to. This is my destiny! AngleSlam, this isn't about you. This is about Tha Puerto Rican realising his dream of finally capturing the OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship, the title I have been screwed out of time and time again in the past! And when it's all said and done... all the smoke has cleared, the dust has settled... Landon Maddix, you can go back to the SWF with your head held high and you can tell Joe Nobody and Bob What'shisface and the rest of the SWF jabronis that you got your ass kicked by the OAOAST's finest! MADDIX Oh, this is 'your yard', huh? Listen buddy, you may be a big name in OAOAST folklore. But rest assured, you are a nobody in my world. And this belt says the OAOAST IS my world! PRL Yeah, well, this middle finger says 'up yours'! *flips Landon off!* Landon's eyes bug open. MADDIX Oh yeah!? Well... Landon begins to pantomime some rather homosexual 'mouth movements', which gets PRL on his feet ready to snap. OKERLUND Gentlemen, PLEASE! A little decorum, PLEASE, this is an official contract signing! Trying to look apologetic, Landon slowly stops his pantomiming. PRL slowly sits back down, unballing his fist. MADDIX So, what happened to the rest of your cronies? Where's... where's Vitamin Barn? PRL Vitamin X!? MADDIX Yeah, that guy. Isn't that your M.O, safety in numbers? PRL Well, it's clearly not yours now, is it? I mean seriously, I feel a little bad. If I'd have known you were going to bring ALL your friends and family out here, I might have done the same. Landon glares a little at the suggestion and prepares to show PR his list of contacts on his cellphone. PRL But no, I jest. Listen, you're new to all this, here in the OAOAST. Maybe you don't realise who you're dealing with, The Lightning Crew. Take a look at my beautiful fiancee, Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez. She's holding the gold. That's just a little preview of what's going to happen at AngleSlam. MADDIX I hope not. Seriously, I happen to value my personal appearance. If I ever wake up looking like THAT, you won't see me around here for dust! "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Uh-oh. COLE This is getting personal now. PRL (raising his voice) I'll have you know, my fiancee is the most dominant and most beautiful woman in the OAOAST! MADDIX Yeah, on Opposite Day! LINDSAY COLE What the hell does that mean!? PRL Listen, just because you ended up with a horsefaced woman for company, don't go ta... MADDIX Horsefaced!? Well, at least she doesn't look like an underage curb-crawler! PRL She is not underage! And at least mine doesn't like a VERY experienced curb-crawler, like yours! MADDIX Your momma! PRL Oh, you didn't just bring Momma Puerto Rican into this! MADDIX Uh-huh! PRL Nuh-uh! MADDIX Yuh-hu... OKERLUND DAMNIT ENOUGH! Both PRL and Landon turn around in shock at the interruption. Poor Lindsay and Megan both look close to tears at the poor attempts at defending their honour put forward by their men. PRL Don't you EVER interrupt the Champ again you worthless jabroni! MADDIX Yeah, don't interrupt the Champ. I'm the Champ. Don't interrupt me. PRL Not for long. MADDIX Yes for long. OKERLUND STOP IT, STOP! YOU'RE ACTING LIKE CHILDREN HERE! ........ PRL He started it. Pouting, Landon picks up PRL's copy of the contract and throws it a few inches down the table, to the future challenger's SHOCK~! COACH This is getting out of hand! COLE (fighting back laughter) This is getting ridiculous. Even the mighty Mene Gene seems to be struggling to keep the petulant AngleSlam main-eventers under control. Suddenly, "Medal" hits, and the crowd erupts at the very sound of it, as it can only mean the arrival of one man...the owner of the OAOAST himself, ANGLESAULT! COACH I bet he's here to can yo' ass for laughing on the job! COLE I think he's got bigger fish to fry than that, Coach! Dressed well in a three-piece suit, Anglesault comes down the aisle and gets into the ring, much to the chagrin of both champion and challenger. Anglesault shakes Gene Okerlund's hand before taking the mic from him, and now the man who signs the checks has an open forum. ANGLESAULT Listen girls... The crowd pops, laughing at Anglesault's unoriginal, yet humorous statement. Landon pounds the table and waves a finger in his face, while PRL shouts at Anglesault, both accusing him of stealing their spotlight. ANGLESAULT Before we delve further into HeldDOWN~! becoming an episode of Laugh-In, I've got a serious matter I'd like to address, that being the main event of this August's pay per view spectacular, AngleSlam. Landon and PRL perk up, wondering exactly what's so serious about their title match. ANGLESAULT See guys, I have no problem with the two of you main eventing AngleSlam. Landon Maddix, you were able to cash in on your guaranteed title shot and walk away as the OAOAST World Champion just a few weeks ago, right here on HeldDOWN~! Now, I know that you, PRL, take issue with what went down that night, and have claimed YOUR title shot, asking that it be at AngleSlam to be held in New York City. Both men agree with what Anglesault has to say so far... ANGLESAULT BUT... ...there's the word they feared. ANGLESAULT It was brought to my attention that there is someone else on the OAOAST roster deserving of a title shot. Now, I very well couldn't pull Tha Puerto Rican out of the match that he earned, but I know what's fair, and I know a big business opportunity when I see it. After consulting with my advisors, namely Bill Watts and the other two that I've dubbed the "Three Wise Men", we came to a conclusion. That on August 26th, at AngleSlam, Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix WILL defend his OAOAST World Heavyweight Championship against Tha Puerto Rican... MADDIX We KNOOOOOOOW! Could we skip the dramatics and cut to the chase...what's the deal here? Winner takes on whoever you have lined up? Or are you gonna throw one of us to the lions while we're preparing for the match? ANGLESAULT Neither, Mr. Maddix. Instead, as of RIGHT NOW, I am ruling that the main event at AngleSlam become a THREE WAY DANCE FOR THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP! The crowd roars, and Tha Puerto Rican can't believe he's not getting his one on one shot, protesting the call. Meanwhile, Maddix is having a shitfit, stomping and pouting because now he's got to worry about not one, but two opponents... ...and that's when "Getting Away With Murder" hits, and nearly blows the roof off the place! ANGLESAULT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, introducing the #1 Contender for the OAOAST World Title, getting his right as former champion to challenge at AngleSlam...ZAAAAAAAACK MALIBU! Malibu, in street clothes, comes out and powerwalks to the ring, while Maddix is flipping out. Putting his title belt on the table, he accosts Anglesault, pushing the company namesake into a corner and grabbing him by the collar...until Malibu slides into the ring, takes Landon by the scruff of the neck, and hurls him over the ropes to the floor! COLE Landon Maddix making a rough exit from the ring! Malibu turns around, and now he's face to face with Tha Puerto Rican, who is not too happy with Malibu sticking his nose into his business, ruining his one on one matchup with the man who screwed him out of using his Golden Contact on Zack Malibu. It's a tense moment for the two men, until Zack walks by him, takes the contract, flips to the last page, and signs. Malibu then takes the contract and jams it into PRL's chest, letting him know that the past crimes of The Lightning Crew against him have not been forgotten. Tha Puerto Rican, giving Malibu the evil eye, puts the contract on the table and signs it as well, officially making both men challengers for Landon Maddix at Angleslam, much to the chagrin of the brash superstar. COLE Can you believe this turn of events!? Zack Malibu, who lost the title due to Landon Maddix taking advantage of his weakened state, is using his rematch clause to disrupt the encounter between Tha Puerto Rican and Landon Maddix! COACH This is BIG, Cole. This is bigger than your sister big! COLE I don't HAVE a sister, Coach. COACH Damn it...I knew I shoulda went with a "your momma" joke there. Maddix hops up on the apron, dangling the World Title at both PRL and Zack. Malibu steps towards him, and Landon hops off the railing. Throwing the belt over his shoulder, he points at both Tha Puerto Rican and Malibu, promising them that they're just going to be notches in his belt, as he backs away. Malibu and PRL's eyes follow Maddix as he stands in the aisle and raises the World Title belt up to boos, while Anglesault claims the signed contract in the background. COLE Landon Maddix is our World Champion, but he may be living on borrowed time, because he has to deal with not one, but TWO challengers with personal vendettas against him! Nevermind the summer heat...at Angleslam I think we're guaranteed a MELTDOWN in our main event! FADE OUT.

We've got a Marshall's around here, but honestly I haven't seen much of anything the few times I've been in their lately. Kohl's is great for sales, because you can get stuff at end of season clearances for as high as 80% off at times. I tend to stick to a handful of stores (Hollister, American Eagle, Express Men (formerly Structure)) because it's what I'm most comfortable in, the clothes hold up for a long time, and I know I won't have any issues with it. Even those stores, despite being amongst the "high-end"/"trendy"/etc. set, have some amazing sales. You just have to know when to hit them up. I just recently got some button down shirts from Hollister that usually retail around $40-$50 on sale for $14. Checking the company websites help too, because a lot of their sale prices online beat out the store sale prices (and sometimes vice versa).

Matt Sydal could be another one. So could Jerry Lynn. Daniels is possible as well since the Sting feud is over.

We've got a chair in the living room that Pillman sleeps in at night.

The final segment is fully edited for your reading pleasure.

This wins the thread.

"Getting Away With Murder" brings the crowd to their feet as we return for the final segment of the night, as the World Champion has promised to make a statement regarding his successful title defense this past Sunday. COLE Just four days removed from a struggle with Landon Maddix that saw the challenger continue to attempt to permanently injure him, Zack Malibu is here on HeldDOWN~! STILL the World Heavyweight Champion! COACH He got busted up, he got bloodied, and some people would say he was downright lucky at the Great Angle Bash this past Sunday! COLE Call it what you want, but the champ is HERE, and he's gonna tell us what's on his mind! Malibu has made his way down the aisle, dressed in jeans, black boots, and a black dress shirt. Zack is greeted with a welcome response from the OAOAST faithful, who show respect for the company's franchise player with deafening cheers and a sea of signs brandishing his name. MALIBU Thank you, thank you all. You know, I said as soon as I won this belt back, that I would restore the honor and prestige that so many before me have given it. I said that I would do my best to make up for what happened during the prior champions reign because I felt it was owed not just to this company or this industry, but to you people. You people continue to support us, you fill these arenas, you wear our shirts, you buy our action figures, and YOU deserve a fighting champion! The crowd, unanimously in agreement, cheer Zack on. MALIBU People have asked me why I went into the match in the condition I was in. For two weeks prior, Landon Maddix and his running buddies did a number on me, attempting to soften me up. What Landon Maddix doesn't realize is that they can beat on me all they want. He should have paid more attention when he was hooked up with Bruce Blank and the Wildcards that I can be one persistent son of a bitch, because Landon, you may have injured me, but you never at any point broke my spirit, and THAT is how I retained over you the other night. Not by chance, not by luck, but because I had faith in MYSELF. I've been here for five years. I've seen them all come and go. I've been on both sides of the fence, and I've battled everyone that came through here, and NEVER did I give up as easily as you expected. I don't care if I'm injured, busted, bleeding...until there is no breath left in my body I will do right by this company and this belt that's over my shoulder right now because THAT is what a champion is! I welcome all challengers, because this company went far too long without a real champion, and it's time to get things back on track! It could be anyone in the back...it could be Landon Maddix again, it could be Bohemoth, it could be someone from the Lightning Crew, it could be my friends in the GPX...if ANYONE wants to challenge the champion, I welcome it, because that's what I want to see out of that locker room. I want to see people earning their keep around here, FIGHTING their way to the top. I want this company to remain the best damn thing going today, and a champion is only as good as his opposition! I... Zack turns around towards the aisleway and stops for a moment, as Mr. Boricua and Vitamin X from the Lightning Crew have come out to ringside! Malibu doesn't say a word as Boricua climbs up the steps and into the ring, while X circles ringside. COLE Two members of Tha Puerto Rican's Lightning Crew are out here now, and I wonder if they're taking what Malibu's been saying to heart. COACH He said he'd welcome all challengers. COLE I don't think he meant NOW, Coach! Boricua confronts Zack, mouthing off in his face, which Zack takes in stride...until Boricua SPITS on the World Title belt, then slaps Zack across the face! Infuriated, Malibu drops down and takes Boricua's legs out from under him, then gets atop him and starts wailing away, momentarily forgetting about Vitamin X, who slides into the ring and starts putting the boots to Zack Malibu! COLE They're mugging the World Champion! VX drags Zack to his feet, but neither man allows him the room to get up, instead pounding on him with clubbing blows across the back. Vitamin X then sends Zack into the corner, and has Boricua whip him into him, nailing Zack wtih a corner clothesline before tossing him out of the corner, into the waiting arms of Mr. Boricua, who drills the World Champion with a SPINEBUSTER~! COLE It's a 2 on 1! We need some help out he...wait, what's going on in the back? Can we get a camera back there!? What's going on!? As Malibu is being worked over in the ring, a camera shakes, as the cameraman jogs through the backstage maze of hallways, where Tha Puerto Rican has just been hurled over the catering table, taking both table and food down with him! The camera pans over, and the man responsible is TODD CORTEZ, who moves the table aside and drags PRL up, running him headfirst into a wall! COLE What the hell...we've got two members of the crew out here, Tha Puerto Rican has been jumped by Todd Cortez backstage, and...now wait, c'mon now! The crowd boos loudly as the South Central Millitia, weilding steel pipes, hit the ring! Vincent and Marcellus roll into the ring, and the Crew members welcome them, asking if they want a shot at Malibu as well. Unfortunately for VX and Boricua, the only shot the SCM takes is on them, as Vincent nails VX in the ribs with one pipe, while Marcellus does the same to Boricua, and follows up with a shot across the back! COACH What's going on here, Mikey!? Am I seeing this right!? The crowd, as shocked as everyone else, roars, as the South Central Millitia, just one week seperated from doing battle with Zack Malibu, have saved him from the Lightning Crew! Vitamin X and Mr. Boricua lay on the floor aching and bruised, while Vincent and Marcellus slowly help Zack Malibu to his feet! COLE I'll be damned, I never thought I'd see the day that the SCM and Zack Malibu were on the same page! Malibu is shocked too, but Marcellus helps him up, assuring him he's going to be OK...but that's BEFORE he slams the steel pipe across Malibu's ribs! COLE WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE TONIGHT!? IMMEDIATELY, the crowd picks up on the swerve, and start booing loudly, as the SCM beat Zack down, gangland style! Zack tries to fight up, but every time he does he's sent back to the canvas, worked over by hard shots from the gangbangers, and that's when Landon Maddix appears on the scene, jogging down the aisle! COACH Maddix! COLE C'mon people, get Zack out of there! Santana and Wallace pull Malibu up, holding him securely with one arm each, as Maddix picks up the mic Zack dropped during the attack. MADDIX Hey, Malibu, guess what? You beat me four days ago, and that's all well and good...but you remember one thing, you took that title match Sunday because of your own damn selfish pride. You wanted to prove so badly that you were going to take this World Title belt of yours (Landon picks up the belt and dangles it in front of Zack's face) that you took my challenge on the spot. Let me spell that out to you again Zack... you accepted my challenge. Zack, that was the biggest mistake of your life, because just like you, I know it's always wise to have a backup plan. So Zack, I'm gonna give you a chance to kiss this belt goodbye, because I am cashing in my Money In The Bank win RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW~! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COACH Oh snap! COLE So THAT'S what this is all about! Landon's trying to set up a cakewalk for the belt! MADDIX REFEREE! ANY referee, we've got what, like 40 of you on the roster? Get your ass out here, because I'm going to END you, Zack! Leave him to me, boys! Santana and Wallace drop Zack to the mat, as Maddix looms over him, playfully kicking him while holding the World Title in his hand. MADDIX Get up, Malibu! Get up, and say goodbye to your precious championship! Zack slowly pushes up, rising to his feet, as Landon throws the mix down and folds the belt up. He cocks it in his hands, and Malibu stands tall as Landon rushes forward with a BELTSH...NO~! ZACK DUCKS IT AND ROLLS HIM UP WITH A SCHOOLBOY, JUST AS EARL HEBNER HAS HIT THE RING~! ONE! T-NO! Popping right back to his feet, Landon unloads with stomps. A flurry of them, pinpointed to the ribs of The Franchise! COLE Look at Maddix, like a man possessed! COACH This is a shocker! I think we all assumed Landon has used his Money In The Bank at The Bash, but it turns out he had it in reserve the whole time. He played Zack like a fiddle! Finally the stomps end and Landon wipes the hair from his eyes. Eyes that are wide, Landon aware of just how close he is. Dragging Zack off of the canvas, Maddix grabs him by the wrist, dragging him forward into a short knee. The air rushes out of Zack's body with a loud, pained groan, as Maddix connects with a second knee. Releasing the arm, a HARD kick then floors Zack, the World Champion sitting up with blood beginning to dribble down his chin. COLE Zack, bleeding from the mouth again! Those internal injuries have had no time to heal what-so-ever and yet again, he's in serious, serious trouble. COACH And Zack can't blame anybody but himself. COLE How!? COACH He wanted to be the 'fighting champion'. He wanted to be the hero. Say what you want about Drek Stone, I don't remember this happening to him. "LET'S GO ZACK!" "LET'S GO ZACK!" "LET'S GO ZACK!" "LET'S GO ZACK!" The Indianapolis crowd try to get behind Zack. Even their support doesn't seem to be helping though as Maddix drags him up by the hair, whipping him into the buckles and watching with a satisfied smile as Malibu crumbles out of the corner. COLE Zack came in injured tonight, he has been beaten down by four other men and now, now THIS! And look at that grin on Landon's face! This is sickening! Slowly walking over to Zack, Landon takes his sweet time. Again he drags Zack up by the hair, delivering another hard kick to the ribs. And in a final insult he then slides to Zack's side, struggling as he takes him up with the ANGLE SLAM~! Not the finest execution, but who cares? "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" COLE Damnit! COACH I think that's what they call 'poetic'. Megan raises her arms in the air, counting along in glee with Landon as he covers... ONE! TWO! THRE... NO, ZACK KICKS OUT! ZACK KICKS OUT~! "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE YES! COME ON ZACK, FIGHT, FIGHT WITH ALL YOU'VE GOT! "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" Utterly shocked, Landon begins to get that sinking feeling. Zack is still in the fight, however barely. But before Zack can get back up, he takes a punch to the ribs. Again. Again. And again and again and again and again, with no end in sight, Maddix trying to turn Zack's internal organs into mincemeat! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Eventually Zack seems to go limp,

Works for me as well. I've been a little under the weather this weekend, coming off a week with added responsibilities around the office since the boss was away. I had a guilty conscience for thinking I'd be holding you guys up, so it's sort of nice to know we could all use the extra day, lol.

COLE And it is main-event time, here in our nation's capital! For the first time one on one, Zack Malibu to take on Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix, with the OAOAST Heavyweight Championship of the World on the line, a momentuous match for this celebratory show to end on. COACH First time one on one but there is a ton of history between these two. I mean, technically, this is just under a year in the making. COLE Landon Maddix formerly associated with The Wildcards, indeed. You can go back to War Games, where Zack drew the submission from Landon and also, the final two men in this year's Lethal Rumble, Zack Malibu again able to overcome Landon. But tonight, the stakes are at their highest yet. World Title, on the line! *MATCH GRAPHIC GOES HERE!* COLE This is Landon's first OAOAST match since AngleMania VI, which isn't neccessarily the makings of a number one contender. But of course, that match was the Money In The Bank win. And Landon has been busy in the past few months as the SWF's World Heavyweight Champion. Up until a couple of weeks ago that is, when Landon lost the title, which in no small coincidence co-incided with him stepping up his pursuit of Zack and the OAOAST Title. COACH Yeah, let's make it real clear for the people. Landon Maddix is a former three-time SWF World Champion. And if he wins the title tonight, he makes history as the first man EVER to have held both the SWF and OAOAST World Championships. The guy has got credentials. COLE That is unprecedented, no doubt. And a very real possibility, bearing in mind what's happened in the past few weeks. Zack Malibu, ambushed after his match with Mr. Boricua and then the next week, lured into an attack from The South Central Militia, by Landon. And then just three nights ago, Zack demanded... three days away from a PPV title defence no less... he demanded he get one of the Militia one on one on HeldDOWN~! He certainly got what he wanted, and then some, as again he was attacked after picking up the victory with Landon doing even more damage to the ribs via a steel chair. COACH It's pretty clear, Zack made a huge error in judgment last week. He let his heart rule his head, yet again. That's why he got beaten down by The South Central Militia. That's why he ended up wrestling three days before this match. Zack is entirely to blame for his rib injury. COLE A little OTT, but there's a valid question in there. Somewhere. How much will Zack's 'bravado' in the past few weeks come back to haunt him tonight, against La Cucaracha who has managed to steer clear of virtually any physicality since the match was announced? We'll find out in just a few moments, we are now moments away from go-time, let's send it up to Michael Buffer. *DING!* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is your main event of evening! Scheduled for one fall with a 60 minute time-limit, it is for the OAOAST HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP OF THE WWWooooooorld!!! "REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH!" The energy Michael Buffer's intro created is instantly sucked out of the arena, as "Personal Jesus" by Marilyn Manson powers through the PA. The lights dim, alternating between complete blackout and really frikkin' bright through the intro. And as the song kicks into gear, the entrance doors part at the hands of Megan Skye, heralding the arrival of Landon who stops at the top of the ramp and thrusts his hands out to his side to a chorus of boos. The lights stop alternating but stay dimmed as Landon makes the trek down the entrance ramp, looking confident but clearly focused. COLE This match, taking on so much more importance since June 3rd, when that man lost the SWF World Heavyweight Championship to Alan Clark, who OAOAST fans will remember as Bloodshed. COACH Boy, that oughta put butts in seats. Heh! Reaching the end of the rampway, Landon wipes his feet on the ring apron before he bounds into the ring, spinning himself into the centre of the ring and soaking up all the main-event spotlight. Landon then backs into his corner, going through some last minute instructions with Megan as he removes his long, sleeveless leather jacket. COLE Believe it or not, this is the first one on one main-event opportunity Maddix has had in the OAOAST. But he will certainly not be phased by the atmosphere. Even with the OAOAST's poster child across the ring from him. An eager buzz of excitement fills the air with the music cut. Megan keeps eye contact with her man, making sure he stays focused on the match and not the hostile fans around him. Which is a hard task when the crowd positively ERUPT as "Getting Away With Murder" hits! Through the shower and sparks of the pyro at the entranceway steps Zack Malibu, his treasured title belt framing the extensive athletic tape that covers his ribs. Zack's teeth are gritted, although whether it's from pain or determination isn't clear as a burst of white pyro shoots off on both sides of the ramp and he strides to the ring. COLE Well, that's one question answered. Zack Malibu, clearly not 100%. COACH Oh gee, here we go with the excuses already. COLE It's not an excuse Coach, it's fact. Zack wouldn't have those ribs taped if he wasn't injured! COACH Sure he would. Makes him look more dramatic in his hour of heroism. The team briefing continues across the ring as Zack enters, keeping half an eye on Landon as he scales the nearest corner to salute the Washington natives. Zack seems noteably cautious coming down from the ropes though, as referee Nick Patrick comes over to take the title belt. Both men are in their respective corners and lock eyes, as Buffer steps in. BUFFER Again, this contest scheduled for one fall. Nick Patrick, the official signed to this match-up, sanctioned by the One And Only Anglesault Thread. Introducing first, in the corner to my left, the challenger. Accompanied to the ring this evening by his manager, MEGAN SKYE! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" BUFFER He hails from Huron, South Dakota by way of Madrid, Espána! Weighing two hundred, eight pounds. He is a former three-time World Champion and tonight aims to create professional e-wrestling history by becoming the first man ever to hold the showcase championships of the Smartmarks Wrestling Federation and the OAOAST! Ladies and gentlemen, he is the self-proclaimed "Saviour Of The OAOAST"! He is "THE NEXT GENERATION"! He is LANDON... "LA CUCARRRRRRRRACHAAAA"... MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM - AAAAAAAAAAADDIIIIIIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Landon comes out of the corner with another theatrical spin and actually does a curtsey to the hard camera. He then goes back to his corner, telling with some of the fans just what he's about to do to their hero. BUFFER And, his opponent in the corner to my right! Hailing from Providence, Rhode Island... he weighs in tonight at a flat two hundred and ten pounds. The flagbearer of the OAOAST and once more, the standard bearer for all who grace it's squared circle. He is the universally proclaimed "Saviour Of The OAOAST"! Ladies and gentlemen, the three-time, reigning and defending, One And Only Anglesault Thread Heavyweight Champion of the Wooooooooorrrrrrlllldd... "THE FRANCHISE"... ZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCKK... MMMMMMMMMMMMMM - AAAAAAALLLLLLLIIIIIBBUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" A veritable flood of blue and gold streamers come flying into the ring from Zack's side as he raises a fist in the air. Referee Nick Patrick offers a look at the belt to both men now with the intros dealt with, Zack taking his title and kissing the OAOAST logo as he hands it back to the referee. Landon is too busy complaining to Megan that he barely acknowledges Patrick, so he simply raises the belt to the fans. COLE And there is the prize, the OAOAST World Title. Big match atmosphere here tonight, AngleSault I'm sure wanting this contest to be extra-special at this particular event, The Great Angle Bash. The formalities are almost over and Patrick is ready to begin. So is Zack. But, there's one problem. Across the ring, Landon still bemoans the fact that he had to be the self proclaimed saviour in the intro. Plus, he didn't get any streamers. At which point Zack obliges, picking up one streamer that didn't unfurl properly and lobbing it at his head! COACH Now that's uncalled for! Landon looks appalled for a second, before finally realising what actually happened and bailing out of the ring holding his ear. The crowd boo as Megan follows out and comforts her man, going so far as to hug Landon to comfort him. "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" COLE (fighting back laughter) This certainly doesn't bode well for La Cucaracha. He got hit in the head with a paper streamer and he looks like he's about to cry out here! COACH He wasn't expecting it, that's all! Peeling himself away from Megan, Landon is fuming and gets on Patrick's case for the use of the 'illegal weapon'. Behind the referee's back Zack has collected a second streamer, which sends Landon scurrying over to the guardrail, cowering as he points Patrick to what's happening. The referee, albeit rolling his eyes, motions for Zack to move back. Which he does... ...not before throwing the streamer, this time catching Megan in the head! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Hey, come on! This is getting ridiculous! Megan's reaction isn't quite as theatrical as Landon's was, but she now joins the protests too. But the final straw has been dealt for Landon. OUTRAGED that his manageress was hit, the challenger storms into the ring and right up to Zack, ranting and raving... *SLAP!* ...before slapping him in the face... *SLAP~!* ...to which Zack responds with a THUNDEROUS slap, knocking Landon clean off his feet!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" *DINGDINGDING!* COLE HERE we go! With the bell rung we are finally under way, as Landon scrambles to his feet and finds himself under a barrage of strikes! Right hands rock him back into the ropes, Zack taking out his frustrations on the face of La Cucaracha until referee Patrick finally manages to get through to him. Zack holds up his hands innocently, before taking Landon off the ropes with an irish whip. Back rebounds Landon, before heading into the lights with a big BAAAAAAACK bodydrop!! (RIP Vinny Mac) COLE No South Central Militia to help Landon now, he is right in the centre of Hurricane Zacky! Rolling to his knees, Maddix holds up his hands and begs off. Cross of the heart and a hope to die. Which Zack seems ready to oblige with, pulling La Cucaracha up by the EARS and backing him into the corner. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" COLE Wow! Big knifedge chop! *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" A second chop connects, Maddix's eyes bursting open in shock. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" And a third chop finds the mark! With things beginning to look a little desperate for him, Landon quickly goes to the eyes, before taking a wild swing. Zack ducks though, hooking Landon as if for a back suplex, only to sit him up on the top rope. Maddix throws back an elbow, from the left and then from the right, both failing miserably. And with a quick tug of the waistband, Zack pulls Maddix into the tree of woe! MEGAN REF! REF, GET HIM OUT OF THE CORNER! Megan's protestations seem to fall on deaf ears, so she climbs to the apron to make herself better heard. Of course, Zack sees this and decides he who is without in should cast the first stone. Scaling to the middle turnbuckle, the World Champion wedges his foot between Landon's legs and STANDS ON HIS NUTS as he places a hand to his heart and looks into the skies. "Oh, saaaaaay, can you seeeeeeee by the dawn's early liiiiiiight What so proudly we haaaaaaiiiil'd at the twilight's last gleeeeeeaming?" With Landon squirming around underneath him trying desperately to get free, Zack finally notices the referee getting rid of Megan and climbs back down. The fans in the nation's capital show their appreciation for Zack's show of patriotism, while Maddix reaches up and covers his lower extremeties with his hands. COACH Now, even you can't condone that Michael! Zack Malibu should not be allowed to sing on national television. Next thing you know he'll be out here covering The Best Of Kelly Clarkson! COLE There's a Best Of Kelly Clarkson!? COACH ZING! Untieing Landon's feet, Malibu lets his opponent fall unceremoniously to the mat face-first, where he immediately tends to his testicles. Zack doesn't let up though, pulling Landon back up and slamming him in the centre of the ring. Off the ropes comes Malibu, dropping a big leg and covering... 1... 2... No. Zack immediately grabs a front facelock and looks to control Landon. However Landon has other ideas and climbs up to his feet, quickly going to the well-taped ribs with a punch which loosens the facelock a little. A second punch has the same effect. Which allows Maddix to bull forward, driving Zack back first into the turnbuckles! COLE That might change the tide right there! Indeed, the moment Zack hits the turnbuckles he crumbles, his hands instinctively going to his ribs as he groans in pain. Maddix squeezes his head out from under Zack and looks to stomp a mudhole in the World Champion. Unfortunately, after just one kick he favours his testicles again, forcing him to resort to a simple and very blatant choke in the corner. "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FI..." Landon just breaks in time. PATRICK C'mon Landon, watch the choke wouldya! MADDIX He was singing the national anthem on my balls, ref! COACH There's something you don't hear every day. Bringing Zack out of the corner, Landon turns his drag into an irish whip when he gets near the centre of the ring. Zack hits the turnbuckles hard and collapses out of the corner holding his ribs. He falls right at Landon's feet, who sensing a breakthrough, stands over Zack and poses rather than follow-up. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" When that pose draws the predictable, negative response, Maddix drags Zack out a little and turns him over onto his back. A quick stomp keeps Zack in place, as Landon hits the ropes. And as he comes off the ropes, he leaps up, driving his feet into Malibu's gut with a double stomp. Bouncing off of The Franchise's frame, Landon comes out of the stomps with a follow-up back senton which further crushes Zack's ribs. Of course, Maddix has to take a moment to preen his hair and gloat over that fine move before he finally reaches back and hooks a leg for a cover... 1... ...which is probably why Zack kicks out even before two. COLE There'll be plenty of time for self-congratulation if Landon manages to defeat Zack. Until then, he might be best served getting down to business. "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" Frustrated, Landon stands up and stomps away on Zack again before taking a brief timeout to re-allign his testicles which draws a few whistles and cat-calls. Maddix glares at the abuse before picking Zack up again. A quick forearm connects, setting Zack up. Another irish-whip sends Zack across the ring and into a corner, hitting the turnbuckles spine first. But this time Zack doesn't come rebounding out and ends up slumped in the corner. So in runs Landon looking to follow up. Only for Malibu to suddenly come to life, rushing out of the corner with a big clothesline that scythes the challenger down! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" COLE Big knockdown by Zack! But you can see, the damage has already been done to those ribs. Zack doubles over the moment he hits the clothesline, favouring the ribs as he goes back over to Landon. A quick jab greets Landon as he comes back to his feet. And a second. Maddix falls back into the corner and Zack goes back to the well... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...with a knifedge chop! Even that exertion seems to tweak at Zack's ribs though. He shakes it off enough to execute an irish whip which sends Landon into the ropes, slowly setting himself for another backdrop. A little too slowly though. Landon goes through the legs with a baseball slide and pops up behind Zack, who isn't able to manoeuver quickly enough to avoid a forearm, delivered to the small of the back! Down to a knee drops Zack, only to be pulled back up and dragged backwards into a modified Backbreaker across the knee!! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Cover by Landon... 1... 2... No! As Zack sits up off the kickout, determined to show he's very much still in the fight, Landon quickly zeroes in on the ribs again. Or, more specifically the tape that's wrapped around the ribs, as he begins to claw and tear at the athletic tape! COLE Referee needs to get in there, Maddix trying to expose those injured ribs even further! COACH Why should the referee get in there? Landon's doing nothing illegal. If he wanted to strip Zack naked, besides me needing somebody to replace your unconscious ass, he'd be well within his rights to do so! Once Zack senses the tape being pulled at he quickly gets defensive, firing back elbows and trying to scuttle away on his backside. A couple of forearms to the back stop him, momentarily at least. Zack again tries to get away though so Landon improvises, wrapping his legs around Zack's body and trapping him in a bodyscissors! COLE Landon, not world-reknowned for his technical ability on the mat. But this is sound strategy. COACH Yeah, because it lets him go for the tape again! Sure enough, Landon uses his free hands to again start unravelling the athletic tape, to boos from the crowd! Zack struggles to fight it off this time. In his desperation he quickly jabs the point of his elbow into Landon's knee socket. And from there he just simply grinds the elbow into the knee, causing Maddix to start howling in pain as well, until he clubs Zack across the back a couple of times to sort him out. With a quick twist, Maddix then turns Zack over onto his back, keeping the body scissored with a pin... 1... 2... Kickout by Zack. Beating Zack to his feet, Landon lands with a quick kick to the ribs. And a second. Landon then delivers a roundhouse kick to the small of Zack's back, then pulls him up for a back suplex. When getting lifted off his feet, Malibu shifts his weight back, floating over Landon, but the tenderness of his ribcage comes into play again, and he keels over upon landing. Landon grabs him in a facelock and tries for a vertical suplex, but Zack throws a leg up to block, and reverses to a suplex of his own, snapping Landon to the canvas! COLE Zack is a great counter wrestler, but Maddix was quick to exploit the weakness of the ribs tonight. Even slight manuevers like countering that back suplex probably did him more harm than good. Zack pulls himself up, the torn tape hanging from his skin, while Landon takes an extra moment to rise. Staggered from the suplex, Landon turns around to meet with a right hand from the champion! Zack then opens fire with hard slaps across the face, in rapid fire succession, then shoves Landon backwards to the ropes! Springing back towards his foe, Maddix gets caught with an inverted atomic drop that keeps him off his game long enough to fall victim to a discus clothesline from Zack! Malibu crawls across his foe and hooks a leg, and the fans instantly urge Nick Patrick to get down and start counting! ONE! TW-KICKOUT! Megan claps wildly, whooing and wowing that her man escaped defeat. Zack looks at her briefly as he pulls Landon up to his feet, but La Cucaracha reacts quickly, pulling Malibu into a hard knee! Zack doubles over, and Maddix takes him and lifts him, dropping him front suplex style on the top rope! COLE Oooh, that couldn't have felt good! COACH Ya THINK!? Malibu dangles, then drops his feet on the apron. As he leans over the top rope, Landon takes a shot, trying to knock him off the apron, but Zack blocks! Landon takes a shot with his left hand, and that one gets blocked as well! Zack drops down and fires his body through the ropes, nailing Landon in HIS ribs with a shoulderblock, then slingshots over him with a sunset flip! Landon struggles not to fall backwards, and then quickly grabs onto the top rope to stop himself from going, then drops down onto Malibu with a seated splash! COLE I'll give him credit, that was a nice counter by Maddix! Zack rolls away, and when he starts picking himself up in the corner, Landon lurks behind him, waiting for a moment to strike. Zack gets up, but Landon shoves him chest first into the turnbuckles, then drags him by the waistband of his tights towards the center of the ring, spins Zack around to come face to face with him, and then traps him in a bearhug! COACH A bearhug!? COLE It's normally a power wrestlers move, Coach, but it'll certainly have the desired effect on Zack Malibu if Landon can keep it clinched! Megan cheers her man on, ordering Landon to "make him tap", while Malibu is trapped in the hold. Zack attempts a struggle, but winces every time, showing obvious agony due to the consistency of Landon's assaults on the ribs. Zack struggles, trying to free himself, and then brings the point of his elbow into the side of Landon's head, knocking him senseless for a second! A second shot with the elbow follows, and that causes a break! Landon staggers away holding his head, giving Zack enough space to fire off his patented superkick...but Zack can barely get the leg up before he collapses AGAIN, sparing Maddix certain defeat! COLE Malibu was looking to try School's Out there, but couldn't do it. Landon Maddix, thanks to that assault by the South Central Millitia last week, has Zack Malibu in the palm of his hand. COACH So, you saying we're gonna have a new champion tonight? COLE I've never been one to doubt Zack, Coach. Not now, not ever...but he is hurting, and even Zack Malibu can only take so much! Maddix takes Zack and nails a European uppercut, then a hard chop of his own, cracking his hand against the skin on Zack's chest. *SLAP~!* "How do YOU like it?" *SLAP~!* "You like that, Zack? Huh? HUH?" *SLAP~!* Landon then takes Zack by the arm and wrenches it, keeping the wristlock held, as he steps over the arm. Landon shouts "Buenos Noches!" to the crowd as he looks to deliver the move, but as he brings his leg up, Malibu yanks his arm free and catches it, then drops down and pulls both of Landon's legs out from under him! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAH!" COLE I don't think that was the good night that Maddix was expecting! Maddix feels for his jaw after falling face first into the unforgiving canvas, but Malibu drops onto Landon's back, pulling his arms behind him in a full nelson and then begins RUBBING LANDON'S FACE INTO THE CANVAS! COACH No, not THE FACE~! Landon cries out in agony, and Megan runs to that side of the ring, begging Zack to stop, as Landon's facial features are smeared across the ring mat. Zack stands up and moves towards the legs now, placing a foot behind Landon's left knee as he lifts the leg up off the canvas, then stomps it back down, sandwiching the knee! Zack then takes the leg and lifts, causing Maddix to dangle for a moment before slamming the knee back to the canvas! COLE It looks like Zack is now exploiting a weakness on Landon Maddix! Landon howls, holding his knee in pain, as Zack rolls him onto his back. Malibu takes him by the legs and tries to apply a submission, but Landon kicks off, knocking Zack to the canvas! Landon scurries to the ropes on his backside, with Megan right there to talk him through it as he favors his knee. Megan's advice? "Shake it off!" Even Landon looks a little unimpressed with the advice, but he carries on, getting to his feet and circling (limping?) around his foe. Landon and Zack then tie up, with Zack dropping low immediately and pulling Landon's leg off the canvas, leaving the challenger in the prone position of hopping on one foot and begging for his life! Malibu swings Landon around, and spins himself around, nailing Maddix with a discus clothesline! Zack then mounts the shoulders and starts hammering on Landon with right hands, then hard elbow shots, with Landon desperately trying to cover up! Zack gets up and takes him by the legs, and tries rolling him into a Boston crab, but Landon quickly crawls out from Zack's grasp and rolls himself to the floor, escaping the submission once again! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COLE Landon Maddix takes to the floor for a breather, and that is not making this crowd happy! Megan, ever-present by her man's side, races over to help him to his feet. Landon assures her he's OK, but whatever his definition of "OK" is, it's short-lived, as Malibu nails him with a baseball slide that sends him falling into the guardrail! Megan jumps back in shock, then quickly helps Landon to his feet...not noticing Zack Malibu racing to the far ropes and coming off with a tope that takes Landon, and nearly Megan, out! COACH YO~! COLE Suicide tope by Zack Malibu, and Landon Maddix is not getting the rest time he so desired! Both competitors lay in a heap on the floor, as Nick Patrick begins the count. ONE! TWO! Megan shouts "get up" at Landon, shaking his head and trying to bring him back to life. THREE! FOUR! Maddix stirs, asking Megan if she'll help him up, which she starts trying to do...finding out that the virtually dead weight of a pro wrestler is not an easy thing to budge! FIVE! SIX! Maddix braces one arm on the apron and pushes up, while Megan wraps the other one around her shoulders and pulls him up by the waist, getting him to a full standing position by the count of seven. He turns around, and *POW~!*, gets nailed with a right hand from Malibu, complete with Batman sound effect! Zack takes Landon and slams him face first into the canvas, and as Landon raises his head, Zack goes for SCHOOL'S OUT...but Landon moves, and Megan shrieks, putting her hands up to block the kick! Zack stops his foot just in time, as it was THISCLOSE from knocking her out cold...but his show of mercy doesn't prove to bring good karma his way, as Landon shoves him ribs-first into the ring apron! COACH Nice guys finish last, Zack! COLE He's not finished yet, Coach. Landon pushes Zack up onto the apron and rolls him into the ring. He turns to Megan and gives her a hug, telling her it's alright, before he gets on the apron. With Zack on the canvas, Landon slingshots in with a senton, but Zack rolls under it, back out to the apron! Landon rolls through with the move, coming up to his feet...but as Zack leaps for a springboard, Megan grabs his ankle and pulls him back to the apron! Malibu kicks her off, knocking her on her ass (which disappoints those at ringside with an up close view of it!), and can't stop Maddix from suplexing him back in...but he CAN counter it, as he lands behind Landon and grabs a rear waistlock, which means one thing... ...it's ROLLING GERMANS TIME~! Zack nails the first one to a loud pop, and struggles with Landon, but manages to bring him to his feet and nails the second one! Slowly, he rolls to his feet again, but Landon kicks his leg back, out of view from Nick Patrick, and catches Malibu low. He spins around and goes for a DDT, but Zack pulls his head out at the last second, and quickly grabs his legs, trying to tie them up, but again, Landon kicks off and scurries away! He moves to the corner, and as Zack gets up he charges in! Landon gets a boot up, but Zack catches it and throws it down...and gets an eye gouge for his troubles! Landon props himself up on the top rope and pulls Zack towards him, trapping his head as he kicks off the ropes, rotating in mid-air... ...CRASH LANDON~! Actually, it's more like CRASH LANDING, as Malibu throws Landon down to the canvas before completion of the move, and finally gets the elusive challenger trapped in a SHARPSHOOTER~! COLE He caught him! He caught him, Coach, and now he's gonna make him pay! Zack tightens his grip on the legs, arching back as much as he can. The sounds of agony from Landon Maddix are music to his ears, and Zack leans back even further, trying his damndest to get that knee to pop! "TAP!" "TAP!" "TAP!" "TAP!" Landon keeps squirming, but he's nowhere near the ropes. Patrick drops to one knee, checking on Maddix's condition and asking if he wants to quit, only to be told off for his troubles! Malibu rears back again, and finally Megan Skye has had enough, entering the ring to confront Malibu! She lunges for him, but Zack breaks the hold and gets his arms up, catching her before she attacks! Megan's face goes white, as she's fearful of what Zack would do to her! Zack keeps her at bay, smirking the whole time, because when Landon goes for the tried and true "jump the face from behind while the manager is being tended to", Zack slides out of the way and shoots Megan towards Landon, causing the two of them to collide, and Zack scores with a schoolboy on the stunned challenger! ONE! TWO! NO! KICKOUT! COLE Landon and Megan thought they had their act down pat, but if anyone has seen it and done it all, it's Zack Malibu! Megan, dazed, rolls to the floor and leans on the apron, holding her head. She likely didn't even notice her man nearly meeting defeat just seconds ago. Landon gets to his feet rather gingerly, his legs hurting him with every step he takes. He turns around, and when he does he wishes he hadn't, because Zack delivers a kick right above the knee, causing Landon's leg to buckle! Another kick, this one to the back of the knee follows, and Landon drops to one knee! Zack takes Landon and moves in for the kill, bending his leg back and lifting him for a kneebreaker...but as Zack drops Landon down, Maddix thinks fast, using the momentum to change gears and snap Zack to the canvas with a headlock takeover! Hopping to his feet, Landon grabs Malibu by the head, but Zack counters almost immediately, carrying Landon over with a Northern Lights suplex! ONE! TW-NO! Maddix locks the waist and pushes up, bringing both men to a standing position, and then lifts Zack horizontal before dropping him on his good (albeit sore) knee with a gutbuster! COACH Who ya gonna call? GUTBUSTERS! COLE Coach, anyone ever tell you you should go on Last Comic Standing? COACH No! You think I should? You think I could win? COLE Why not? With puns like that, there wouldn't be anyone left in the room with you! COACH Well ha ha HA, Mikey Cole. Malibu crawls across the canvas now, and Landon draws the fans' disapproval by hovering over Zack, taunting him with light slaps across the back of the head. Landon then sits on Zack's back and pulls his head up, trying to jab his fingers in Zack's eyes! Patrick admonishes Maddix, and Landon snaps back at the official, showing no fear of reprimand as he pulls Zack to his feet...but Zack shoves him away and then fire's off a quick SCHOOL'S OUT once again...and STILL can't connect, as Maddix is too quick for him, catching the foot! Landon then segues the missed attempt into a fireman's carry, getting Zack up on his shoulders for GO 2 SLEEP...but the weight is too much and his leg buckles again! Landon loses his grip in favor of tending to his knee, causing Zack to slide down behind his back and hit the ropes, delivering a ZACK ATTACK~! to the side of La Cucaracha's head~! COLE The shining wizard connects! Zack Malibu scores with a signature move that could save him his title here tonight! ONE! TWO! THR-NO!~! Maddix kicks out AGAIN! COACH Or NOT, Mikey Cole! Zack Malibu may have met his match in the resilience department! Zack rolls off of Maddix, laying on the canvas for a moment to get whatever type of rest time he can afford. Zack powers to his feet, fueled by the chants of his name from the capacity crowd, but he remains keeled over, favoring the ribs that have sustained more damage than they should have in the past few weeks, and certainly within the past few days. Nick Patrick notices Zack's condition and checks him over, but Zack assures him he's OK as he walks towards the ropes. With Maddix down, Zack starts climbing the turnbuckles, and the crowd reaction grows louder and louder as he climbs up each rope. Finally perched on the top, Zack steadies himself and rises to his feet, preparing to launch himself off the top...that is until Megan hops up on the apron, shaking the ropes so that Zack falls and crotches himself on the turnbuckles! COLE HEY! Get her out of there, Patrick, come on! The fans boo loudly as Megan argues with Nick Patrick, proclaiming it was an accident and she was just trying to "cheer Landon on and wake him up!" Patrick tells her to get off the apron and she listens, although the real damage has been done. Zack remains stuck in the position on the ropes, aching over what just happened to him. Maddix gets to his feet and staggers towards the corner, pulling Malibu up onto his shoulders and staggering a few steps away from the ropes. Shouting "GO TO SLEEP~!" to the crowd, Landon pushes Malibu off his shoulders, head first into his right knee! COACH Malibu just went to sleep! Landon falls back, groaning over the impact that his own knee sustained, but quickly sucks it up and crawls over to the Modern Day Warrior, hooking a leg for the cover! ONE! TWO! THRE-NO! NO! SHOULDER UP! COLE Looks like he's still awake to me, Coach! Maddix pounds on the canvas and cries foul, like any good heel would do. Patrick tells him otherwise, and Landon blows the official off, not wanting to hear his version of the story. Turning to see Zack rolled onto all fours, Landon delivers a running soccer kick to the ribs that puts Zack on his back, then drags him to center ring and drops onto him with a back senton! Zack immediately tries curling into a ball, blood coming out of his mouth for the second time this week, as Landon puts the boots to him. COLE Zack's got to be bleeding internally once again, and Landon Maddix...what's he going for now? Landon mounts Zack's shoulders, striking him with some rapid forearm shots that cause Zack to see stars! Maddix then gets off his rival and slowly steps out to the apron. He climbs the ropes even slower, and raises his arms to the crowd, mockingly looking to draw support from them. Instead he gets nothing but boos, which are music to his ears, as he cups them in mocking fashion to again taunt the audience. Landon then stands up on the top and dives off, tucking his legs in before kick them out as he soars off with a frog splash right down onto THE CANVAS~! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" COLE He moved! Zack Malibu moved out of the way out that frog splash, which would have been certain doom! Landon kicks his legs as he puts his hand to his chest. Zack uses every last bit of energy he's got in the tank and drags himself towards the ropes, using them as an aid in getting to his feet. Stumbling like a college girl at Mardi Gras, Zack focuses on the wounded former SWF World Champion. Malibu grabs Maddix, and pulls him up, but Maddix reaches up and pulls Zack down, right into a small package! ONE! TWO! THREEEEEEEEEEENO! NO! Zack rolls through and brings Landon up, hooking his leg as he lifts him for a FALLING STAR DRIVER~!...but Zack has trouble getting him up, and drops Landon back to his feet! Landon reacts fast, shoving Zack to the ropes and grabbing a sleeper hold! Beads of sweat pour down Landon's face as he tries to put Malibu to sleep with yet another move, but Zack will have none of it, shifting his body to the side and drilling Landon's ribcage chock full o' elbows! Maddix breaks, and Zack goes for the ANGLE SLAM~!, but Landon squirms and falls behind him...right onto his bad wheel! Landon nearly collapses by his own doing, but instead falls to the canvas by Zack's doing, after a SCHOOL'S OUT FINALLY CONNECTS~! COLE HE GOT HIM THAT TIME! ONE! TWO! THREE! DING! DING! DING! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" "Getting Away With Murder" echoes throughout the arena, mixed with the ferocious cheers of the fans, as Nick Patrick takes a weary Zack Malibu and raises his arm up high! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner, and STILL OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION...ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK MAAALLLLLLLLLIBUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Megan crawls into the ring and checks on Landon, who lay motionless on the apron. After being handed his World Championship, Zack slowly makes his way to the corner and leans against it for a moment, then backs away and raises the belt over his head and salutes his fans. COLE He came here tonight injured. He was forced to cough up blood. He wrestled at less than one hundred percent, just the way Landon Maddix intended, but Maddix could still not seal the deal! Zack Malibu proved once again tonight why he is a fighting champion, overcoming all obstacles to restore credibility to the OAOAST World Championship! COACH Zacky's gotta be careful, Mikey Cole. One man, even if he's a superman like Zack Malibu, can only stand so much. Landon Maddix worked him over pretty good and he still came out on top, but what about the next guy? No one's invincible, Mikey Cole! COLE He might not be invincible, but he's still the World Heavyweight Champion! Zack Malibu, looking as mortal as one could, rolls out of the ring and is immediately met on the ramp by trainers and road agents looking to tend to him. Malibu is helped up the ramp bloodied and broken, but definitely not beaten, and most certainly STILL the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion.

My Secret Identity

Zack Malibu vs. SCM member Vincent Santana

COLE Welcome back to HeldDOWN~! fans! Michael Cole alongside the Coach, and a...special guest joins us at this time, none other than the challenger to Zack Malibu and the World Heavyweight Title this Sunday, Mr. Landon Maddix. MADDIX That's right, Landon Maddix is here, and what you two need to do is sit back and relax and watch the story unfold before your very eyes...the story of how the biggest fraud and phony in OAOAST history can't live up to his word, can't live up to being a fighting champion, because he got a little boo-boo. COLE I assume the "little boo-boo" you're referring to is the injured ribs, suffered at the hands of your paid hitmen, the South Central Millitia last week. MADDIX Paid hitmen!? Listen Cole, as much as you want to think that Zack Malibu is the end all and be all of the wrestling world, that he's some sort of superhero come to life, the fact is the man has more enemies than he thinks. The SCM are just two names on a long list, and that's why they did what they did, and that's why Vincent Santana is gonna school him tonight and then leave him to me on Sunday. COLE And you're hoping that he's served to you on a silver platter, and that you can take the OAOAST World Championship in a cakewalk, don't you? MADDIX Does it really matter, Cole? A win is a win, a title is a title. Zack Malibu can show up 100%, 50%, or not at all, and I could still guarantee that I've gotten enough God-given talent to "school him"...see what I did there?...and walk away the OAOAST World Champion. "Cross That Line" begins playing after Landon's proclamation, and the fans turn their attention to the entraceway, where the OAOAST's resident South Central gangbangers head down the aisle. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following non-title contest is set for one fall! Coming to the ring at this time, accompanied by Marcellus Wells, weighing in tonight at two hundred, ten pounds, this is VINCENT SAAAAAANNNNNTANAAAAAA! The Millitia strut around ringside, taunting and attempting to scare ringside fans, kids included. The boys from LA stop by Sofa Central as well and make nice with Landon Maddix, doing no favors to show that they aren't in cahoots at all. MADDIX What's up fellas! Vincent, take him out tonight, baby! It's your night tonight! Santana gives daps to Maddix and hops up on the apron, entering the ring and taunting the crowd while his partner does the same from ringside. Fans aren't happy with the SCM, but when Papa Roach's "Getting Away With Murder" hits, that changes things. COACH Da champ is HERE! MADDIX Coach, phone call for you, it's 2004 telling you to shut up already. Getting a hero's welcome, Malibu appears at the top of the stage, with an addition to his wrestling gear: taped ribs, obviously the result of the assault last week. MADDIX What is this, Halloween in July? I didn't think preps went for the mummy look! BUFFER His opponent, is the current reigning and defeneding OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion...from Providence, RI, weighing in tonight at two hundred, ten pounds, he is ZAAAAAAAAAAACK MAAAAAAAAAAAAALLIBUUUUUUUUU! Malibu, always one to act on impuse, charges the ring out of rage and fury, but it proves to be a mistake, as Santana pounces, jumping on the champ as soon as he slides into the ring! COLE Santana is wasting no time in going after Zack, more specifically those damaged ribs of his! The World Title falls to the mat as Zack is caught off guard by his rival, who delivers some shots across the back before pushing Zack into the corner and following up with repeated shoulderblocks! The tape around his ribs only offer so much protection, and Malibu agonizes loudly as Santana drives his shoulder into the ribcage of the champ! Santana pulls Zack out of the corner and sends him across the ring, but Malibu counters and sends Santana to the corner! Vincent goes with the move, but stops before he crashes into the turnbuckles, leaping onto the top rope and then over a charging Malibu, culminating in Zack being shoved ribs first into the corner! MADDIX That's how you win matches! Find a weakness and exploit it to its fullest. That's what I'm gonna do to your pride and joy this Sunday, Cole! COACH Yeah, we'll see about that, playa! MADDIX You say something, date rapist? COACH ... Back in the ring, Santana rams his knee into the small of Zack's back as he's trapped in the corner, then drops him with a back suplex. Santana steps out onto the apron and turns and points to Maddix, who cheers him on from the broadcast booth as he slingshots in with a senton, dropping his body weight onto Zack Malibu! MADDIX (clapping) Thatta boy, Vincent! Keep it up and you'll get the first World Title shot under my reign! COLE You haven't won ANYTHING yet, Maddix! Sit down! MADDIX Tell me, Michael Cole, how is it living in denial? How's the weather there? Malibu curls up into a ball, his knees tucked in to his chest as to protect his ribs, but Vincent drags him to center ring by a leg, then plants a boot in his stomach before circling Malibu and taunting him to get up. The taunts ire the crowd, and they respond by booing the Millitia member loudly. Marcellus storms around ringside, telling the people to shut their "suburban cornbread pieholes" up! MADDIX You tell 'em, One Eye! COACH Tell 'em what? Even I don't know what that meant! Santana reaches down and yanks Zack up, but when he does, Malibu knocks his arm away, and unleashes a flurry of punches and chops to rebound from his beating! The crowd eats it up with a spoon and asks for seconds as Zack sends Santana in, then elevates him high up above with a back bodydrop before gravity sends him back to Earth, crashing to the canvas! Zack leans on the ropes, favoring the ribs still, but when Santana gets up, Zack bursts forward and nails a running lariat that spins Santana around in the air before he falls back to the mat! COLE Malibu is fired up! MADDIX Ooooh, real scary, an angry white boy. Eminem does it better AND has street cred! COLE You've been hanging with the Millita WAAAAY too much, Landon. Zack picks Vincent up, nailing two chops to the chest after the fact, then traps Santana in a front facelock. Zack lifts for a suplex, but Santana kicks his legs and is able to shift so that he fall behind Zack, and nails forearms to the small of Zack's back, then pushes him forward to the ropes and nails a roundhouse kick to the small of the back when Zack bounces backwards! Zack falls to one knee, and Santanta quickly applies a rear chinlock, telling the crowd "he ain't nothin'", and following up with a hard slap across the top of Malibu's head! Santana brings Zack up and then drives a knee up into the ribs, then gutwrenches him up into a powerbomb...NO! Zack counters with a rana that takes Santana over! With his foe stunned, Zack hits the ropes...but when he does, Wells grabs his ankle, tripping him up before pulling him to the outside! COLE Come on now, they jump the guy last week, and now it's a two on one! MADDIX What do you mean? Marcellus was just checking the bottom rope to make sure it was tight...Malibu's just clumsy, he fell on his own! COLE And he pulled himself to the floor? MADDIX Oh stop trying to make something out of nothing, Michael Cole. Marcellus is just making sure Zack was OK! Referee Jack Doan moves towards the ropes to admonish Marcellus, but Santana feigns injury, doing his part in distracting the referee so that his partner can work over the champion! Marcellus puts the boots to Zack, while Landon cackles gleefully on commentary, and then rolls him back in for his partner to go for the cover, reaping the benefits of having his teammate at ringside. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! COACH Atta boy, Zacky! Never surrender! MADDIX You cliche' swinging bucket of suck...do you add ANYTHING to this announce team? I should be out here every week, since it's obvious you need someone of my stature to carry you. Santana picks Zack up, then grabs him for The Throwdown...but Zack fires an elbow into the side of his head to break, then swings around him and grabs a rear waistlock, pulling Santana up and over with a release German suplex! COLE Notice how he didn't hold on as he normally would! Zack is hitting hard and hitting fast, making sure he doesn't exert himself any more than he has to with those injured ribs! Santana crawls towards the corner, pulling himself to his feet, but when he turns around he's met with a running corner clothesline from Malibu, who then backs away, favoring the ribs. Zack sucks it up, then charges in again, nailing a diving corner splash that crushes the SCM member against the buckles, then snapmares him out of the corner! Zack then hits the ropes and nails a running soccer kick that connects, and hits the ropes immediately after, coming off with a kneedrop that finds its mark on the temple of Vincent Santana! MADDIX C'mon Vincent, get up! Get up! Zack motions for Vincent to do the same, but it's because Malibu has him in his sights, and is planning on letting him know that SCHOOL'S OUT~! Marcellus notices this and hops up on the apron, now looking to be the distraction...but Malibu simply turns and nails HIM with the superkick, sending him falling off the apron to the floor! COLE School's Out on Marcellus Wells! Zack Malibu's taking it to the South Central Millitia tonight! MADDIX God damn...GET UP, both of you, GET UP! Marcellus is out cold, so he can't hear the encouragement of the number one contender, and is not going to be the deciding factor in the contest tonight! Malibu turns around and nearly eats another boot to his weakened ribs, but catches Santana's foot! Thinking fast, Vincent tries to follow up with an enzugiri, but Malibu drops his head, forcing Vincent to eat canvas! As he staggers up holding his jaw, Malibu moves in for the kill, scooping him up before dropping him on his head and neck with the ANGLE SLAM~! COLE ANGLE SLAM! That's gotta do it! Malibu cradles a leg and stares out at Landon Maddix, who sits fuming as Doan does his job and makes the count. ONE! TWO! THREE! DING! DING! DING! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner, ZAAAAAAAACK MAAAAAAALIBUUUUUUUUU! The fans are happy, but Landon Maddix is not, as he tears the headset off and throws it down. Jack Doan hands Zack his prized championship as he comes to his feet, leaving Zack to pose for his supporters. COLE A hard fought victory, and justice was served after what went down last week with...hey, wha...what are you doing?! Maddix, already angered, dumps Michael Cole out of his seat and folds the chair up, sliding into the ring! Unbeknowst to Zack, Landon readies the chair in his hands, and when the World Champion turns around... COACH Look out, Zacky! WHAM~! The steel chair is brought down over his head, laying him out cold! COLE That dirty son of a... The fans shower Landon with boos as he takes the chair and holds it vertically, and being relentlessly driving the edge of it into Zack's ribs, one shot after another! COACH He's gonna turn his ribs to dust if he keeps that up! We gotta get some help out here! Zack, who is now coughing up blood, can't muster a comeback, especially when Landon takes the chair and drives the edge of it into his throat, causing Zack to begin to choke on his own blood! COLE Someone get this sick son of a bitch out of here! He's gone too far tonight! The crowd roars as the locker room empties out, and Landon, even with a steel chair, knows enough not to bother. Throwing the chair down, Landon bails out of the ring smiling, with the damage done and the message sent. COLE They'll meet this Sunday at the Great Angle Bash for the World Heavyweight Title, but Landon Maddix, looking to soften up the World Champion, has struck again! Wrestlers and officials tend to the World Champion, who coughs up more blood as he's helped to his feet. Holding his ribs, Malibu is aided to the locker room by his peers, while his arch rival gets away scott free... ...for another few days, at least.

The GAB would be as good a place as any. Unless you guys want to stretch something out until Angleslam.