Zack Malibu

COLE It's time now fans for the main event of the evening, a Steel Cage Match for the HI-YAH Championship. While cage matches are typically put forth for major grudges, this seems to be more for keeping people out of the action tonight. With tension rampant between various allegiances, especially Zack Malibu and The Wildcards, the cage match seemed the safest bet for a fair fight. CABOOSE And what a fight it's going to be. Faqu has been determined to capture this belt since Anglemania this past year. Tonight, he gets his shot within the walls of the cage, but in the back of his mind, has to be concerned with the elimination of his partner earlier tonight at the hands of Bloodshed! COACH Pssh, concerned? I'd be furious! Everyone knows that's a Malibu call! CABOOSE You don't know that. COLE Whatever the case may be, that just added more fuel to the fire. No matter what Malibu claims, The Wildcards have stated that they'll continue to "back him up" whether he wants it or not. No matter how hard Malibu attempts to cut the tie, his decision to bring in The Wildcards has haunted him in recent weeks. Tonight, he attempts to make up for it by giving Faqu a fair fight, and in the process putting himself and his championship reign in danger! "My Own Summer" hit, and the fans pop like mad, as the challenger appears on the entranceway, pausing for a few moments before making his way down to the cage surrounded ring. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest, set for one fall, is for the HI-YAH HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, from Honolulu, HI, and weighing in tonight at two hundred, ninety seven pounds, he is the "Samoan Tsunami", FAAAAAAAAAAAAAQUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Looking focused, Faqu walks up the steps and through the cage door, raising an arm out to the fans who applaud his arrival. Faqu then hits the ropes and warms up a bit, all while keeping his eye on the entranceway, as he awaits the champion. "Getting Away With Murder" plays, and a loud pop follows, although scattered booing is noticeable. Given recent events, it's no surprise as to why, as even the fans have tired of Malibu's allegiance to the outsiders contingent of Bloodshed, Todd Cortez, and Bruce Blank. COLE The champ is here! COACH Dude...SO 2004. Malibu comes out looking less animated than usual, more intent on keeping his belt as well as the respect of his peers. He simply heads right for the ring and slides through the door, unstrapping himself of the HI-YAH belt and seemingly wanting to get this over with ASAP. The two men walk closer and closer to each other, meeting in the dead center of the ring. Of course, "dead" center might not be the best description to use when you're in there with an agile Samoan monster whose bad side you've recently gotten on. Still, Zack breaks the tension of the staredown with the extension of his right hand, offering respect to someone he still considers a friend. COLE Now, it'll be interesting to see Faqu's reaction here, because he's not taking Zack's recent actions lightly. CABOOSE To play devil's advocate though, Cole, some of those feelings could be bitterness and resentment for the fact that he's struck out everytime he's gone for the HI-YAH Championship. COLE Things have certainly gotten in the way in the past, but with a wall of steel seperating these men from the outside world, it's finally one on one, and at Malibu's call no less. Faqu, still staring a hole through Zack, looks down at the end, and knocks it away. Malibu takes a deep breath and backs up, coming up to his "friend" and again extends his hand. Faqu again looks down, this time in disbelief that Malibu would try this tactic again...but this time the Samoan takes the hand of Zack Malibu! AND YANKS HIM TOWARDS HIM, UP ONTO HIS SHOULDERS! COACH He's gonna drop him already! Frantically, Malibu shakes himself off, avoiding Faqu's Death Valley Driver! The Samoan quickly turns around, and Malibu reacts fast with SCHOOL'S OUT...but it's caught! Faqu throws the leg down, and then starts focusing on the leg with hard kicks, connecting with the upper thigh and area just over the knee. Malibu finally starts blocking the kicks and starts retaliating, using hard slaps to fight back, and then drives Faqu back even further with some wicked chops! Malibu then shoots Faqu to the ropes...or at least tries to, as Faqu reverses and sends Malibu in! Zack rebounds, running right into the grasp of the big man, who pushes Zack up over his head, and then throws him back down to earth with a hard slam! As Malibu reels, Faqu bounds for the ropes, and comes off with a front dropkick that knocks Malibu back down to the canvas just as he had gotten up! COLE He moves fast for a man his size, and between the power and momentum behind it, that dropkick could not have felt good! CABOOSE When does ANYTHING you see inside the ring feel good, Cole? Faqu picks Zack up, then starts rattling him with repeated hard slaps before backing him into the corner and stuffing his face with forearm shots before turning around, walking away...and hitting a running forearm in the corner! Faqu then sends Zack across the ring, forcing him to slam hard against the turnbuckles. He charges in, but Malibu rolls out of the corner, avoiding the oncoming charge! Faqu turns around, but Malibu is up and starts firing off jabs with his right hand, continuously stunning Faqu with the blows! Zack then hits the ropes and delivers a single leg dropkick, cracking Faqu's jaw, and causing him to teeter back against the ropes! Zack approaches, and Faqu quickly shoots for the legs, taking Zack down to the canvas and hooking the legs while he stands back up...and he catapults Zack into the cage wall! BUT ZACK WAS READY FOR IT! COLE Look at THAT agility! Like Spider-Man, Malibu clings to the cage wall and climbs up a bit higher, looking over his shoulder before letting go and turning his body around so that he can land where his focus lies...on Faqu's shoulders, so that he can snap him over with a huracanrana! CABOOSE HOLY! COLE That was amazing! Malibu pops right up, fueled by the roar of the crowd, and nails Faqu as he comes up with hard running lariat that simply staggers the big man. Malibu then hits the ropes again, but as he goes for a second lariat, Faqu throws his arm up and hooks Zack's, swinging around him and trapping him in a full nelson! COACH He saw that one coming a mile away! Malibu's way too predictable. CABOOSE Oh is that so? Faqu keeps his hands clenched, as Zack tries his best to wriggle free. Moments go by, but with each passing second there's more pressue put on Zack's neck, and it becomes too much to take. Zack's struggling becomes less and less, as his legs give and he's forced down to his knees! COLE Faqu is pushing down hard on the neck, any more force and we could see a submission! Malibu stays on his knees, his upper body being pushed forward due to the lock on his neck. Faqu keeps the full nelson applied, because with such minimal effort it's giving his body a chance to rejuvenate. He puts the pressure on, but Malibu begins to fight back, again trying to shake free before trying to push up off his knees...but Faqu cancels any plans of a comeback by yanking Malibu off his knees and planting him with a full nelson slam! Malibu slams down on the canvas, and the big man hits the ropes and comes off with a big splash, crushing Malibu under his body weight! ONE! TW-NO! CABOOSE First pinfall of the contest by the challenger, or by anyone for that matter, and he barely got two. COLE I don't think anyone, including us, expected Malibu to go down too soon. Faqu pries Zack off the canvas, trapping him in a front facelock and using that tactic to again wear Malibu down. He then segues into a vertical suplex, but Malibu slips out and shoves Faqu to the ropes...but the big man barrells off and nails Zack with a thunderous shoulderblock! Faqu then hits the ropes again, but Malibu rolls onto his stomach, forcing Faqu to continue running the ropes. Faqu comes off again, and Malibu leaps up for a leapfrog...but instead of going under the move, Faqu catches Zack out of the air, and puts him across his shoulders, again for a Death Valley Driver! CABOOSE He's got him, he's got...NO! Malibu wriggles free from the finisher once again, and wraps his arms around Faqu's waist, trying to use a German suplex, but Faqu elbows out of it, cracking Malibu in the jaw! Faqu turns around and ties up with a collar and elbow lockup, pulling Malibu away from the ropes, then hits a European uppercut that dazes Malibu long enough for Faqu to snare him by the head and run him across the ring, bieling him headfirst into the wall of the cage! COLE THERE'S the breakdown, right there. It's all out the window now! Malibu is down, and Faqu stands over him, reaching down and pulling his now bleeding head up and goes to work, crossfacing him repeatedly! Faqu then pulls him to his feet, then yanks Zack's head back, snapping him down to the canvas before hitting the ropes once again, and coming off with a kneedrop to the cut open forehead of the HI-YAH Champion! Malibu convulses on the canvas, as Faqu hits the ropes again, and delivers another big splash to Malibu, again staying on top of him for the count! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! COACH Dammit...he's persistent, can't ever say he's not! Faqu again helps Malibu to his feet, but then takes him down the hard way, this time courtesy of a gutwrench suplex. Faqu then drags Zack to the corner, and with Malibu dazed and bleeding, the big man ascends the turnbuckles, setting himself up for flight! COLE We know that Faqu is more than capable of taking to the air, and...wait, wait! Faqu, climbing the ropes with his back to his opponent, doesn't see Zack roll to his feet. In an act of desperation, Malibu lunges forward and shoves the Samoan's legs out from under him, crotching him on the top rope! Malibu then pulls his friend/foe down into the tree of woe, and starts brutalizing him with kicks, as the sight of his own blood has put Zack into a rage! CABOOSE He's got Faqu trapped in the tree of woe, and now he's cutting loose on him! Malibu backs up, then charges forward, letting out a primal scream before driving his knee into the exposed ribs of the upside down Samoan! He then spins himself around and heads to the far corner before charging again, this time leaping into the air and coming down with a hesitation dropkick to the jaw of the strong style monster! Malibu then crawls towards Faqu, jabbing at his head while Faqu flails his arms, trying to deflect the blows from his unfortunate position, but Malibu grabs him by the head and pushes him up, then yanks him off the ropes by his head and drops him hard on the canvas! COACH DAMN! That's one way to get out of the tree of woe! Malibu then moves into a ground and pound, clubbing Faqu across the head before standing up and hitting a legdrop on his rival! Malibu stands up, and then quickly drops an elbow, then again, then repeats the process a third time, connecting with all three elbowdrops before pulling Faqu up and summoning the strength to hoist him up and over with a snap suplex! Malibu then hits the ropes and leaps high into the air, crashing down with a fourth elbowdrop onto Faqu that draws loud applause from the crowd as he covers for a pin! ONE! TWO! NO! COLE Faqu getting a shoulder up there, but Malibu has now come to terms that he needs to be relentless...that this isn't a match between two friends anymore! Right on cue, Malibu brings Faqu up and hurls him through the ropes, into the small crevice between rope and cage. Zack follows suit, and takes Faqu by the head, grating his face along the steel wall before ramming him repeatedly into it! Faqu starts to slump down, so Malibu steps back into the ring, then drags Faqu back in by his ankles, and now does exactly what was done to him earlier, as he delivers some crossfaces of his own to Faqu! Once Zack finishes with that, he picks Faqu up and delivers a hard chop, then wrenches the arm, drops an elbow on the bicep, and strikes with another hard chop before running the ropes and coming off with a high bicycle kick that puts Faqu on his back, staring at the ceiling! CABOOSE He drilled him with those educated feet. I think all professionalism and sportsmanship is out the window now, boys. As soon as those words are uttered by Caboose, Malibu heeds to them, lifting Faqu's legs up and opening them so that he can plant a boot in the big mans midsection! Some fans boo the tactic, but Malibu doesn't bother playing to the crowd, instead focusing on the task at hand. He grabs Faqu's legs again, but this time the big man kicks free, knocking Zack down to the mat! Malibu gets right back up and goes for the legs, but again he's kicked away by Faqu, who is trying to make it to his feet. Malibu gets up just as Faqu is, and grabs him by the head, but the big man powers out of Zack's attempt and lifts him off his feet, carrying him across the ring before dropping him across the top strand of rope crotch first! "Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh!" COLE Yep, no sportsmanship in that move whatsoever! COACH But it got Zack off his back! Malibu dangles dangerously, a look of hurt emblazoned across his face. Groggy, Faqu approaches again, and with Malibu reeling from having his special place dropped across the cable, the Samoan opens up with chops to the defending HI-YAH Champion, rattling him with every shot until a fourth chop knocks Malibu off his unwanted perched, and he collapses down to the area between the ropes and the cage wall! CABOOSE Malibu's down and out right now, and there's no rolling out of the ring for a rest here tonight. Faqu backs off and uses Malibu's aching to get in some recovery time of his own, all while keeping Malibu in his sights. Soon enough, the Preppy One begins struggling to his feet, using the ropes as an aid in doing so...but once he's up the Samoan charges, shooting his upper body through the ropes and SPEARING MALIBU AGAINST THE CAGE WALL~!~! COACH YO~! COLE Zack Malibu...he just got PLASTERED against that wall of steel that's surrounding the ring! "FAH-QU~!" "FAH-QU~!" "FAH-QU~!" CABOOSE Listen to these fans! I think they sense the Samoan is en route to victory! After shaking off the effects of driving his body weight into his opponent, Faqu reaches down over the ropes, grasping for Malibu and pulling him up. He lifts him up in suplex position, but holds him, and walks back a few steps, closer to the wide open space of the ring...and then DROPS Zack right on his head with a devestating brainbuster! COLE Faqu completes the trifecta of targeting the neck, back and head, and in spectacularly brutal fashion! Faqu rolls onto Malibu, and even runs his forearm into Malibu's face as he pins him down...but as the referee's hand hits the mat for the first time, the determined Samoan notices something other than Malibu's shoulder starting to rise for a kickout. COACH YO...I mean...yeah, YO, what are they doing out here!? The crowd's attention turns not to Malibu's escape of defeat, but to the aisleway, as Bloodshed, Bruce Blank, and Todd Cortez, the least favorite people in the OAOAST locker room, have made their way out...not to mention Blank is brandishing his favored barbed wire baseball bat! COLE They have no right...NO RIGHT being out here! Zack told them to stay out of it. COACH THAT'S your reasoning? That ZACK said for them not to come out? It's a setup Cole, plain and simple! The Wildcards slowly walk the aisle, and after Zack kicks out at two from the brainbuster, Faqu gets up and looks through the cage wall, then waves The Wildcards on, daring them to see what they can do! COLE He's...he's INVITING them to the ring, but with the cage up...that's why... CABOOSE What the...who just ran by us? Someone hopped the rail! The crowd is buzzing once again, this time because THE HOOLIGANS have come through the crowd on the other side of the arena, and have hit ringside! In a shocking turn of events, the arrival of Static, Jax, and even Jamie O'Hara, last seen getting stapled alive, draws a pop from the crowd...and ESPECIALLY when they block the doorway to the steel cage! COLE The Hooligans, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm glad to see them! COACH Yeah boys! What now, Wildcards!? The Wildcards back off, although Blank is still snickering about what's going down. The Hooligans flank the ringside area, making sure no one gets to the cage, because now it's all about Zack and Faqu, and who the better man will be. Inside the cage walls, Faqu picks Zack up for a second brainbuster, or maybe a suplex...but whatever it is, it's avoided, and Malibu lands behind him, and hits a quick German suplex, surprising the Samoan! ONE! TWO! Faqu rolls a shoulder, but as he does that, Malibu simply rolls to his feet, using all his energy to pull the big man up, and drop him with another German suplex! Rather than try for the pin, Malibu continues the chain, rolling through the move and dropping him with a third German suplex before rolling to his feet once again, this time hooking one of Faqu's arm with his own, trapping him in a half nelson...and then throwing Faqu backwards, dropping him on the back of his head and neck with a release half nelson suplex! "Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh!" CABOOSE Nevermind wrestling, these two are going to be stuck facing off in wheelchair basketball after this match! Malibu rolls Faqu onto his back, and sets him up in position near the ropes. Zack then climbs the turnbuckles, pausing for a moment to look outside at The Wildcards, who are looking on with smiles, as the HI-YAH Heavyweight Champion leaps from the top, and crashes down on the big man with a flying legdrop! Malibu hooks the leg, and the referee is right there for the count. ONE! TWO! THR-NO! NO! SHOULDER UP! COLE He kicked out! Frustrated, Malibu slams his hands on the canvas, and picks Faqu right back up, not wasting any time in shooting him to the corner. Faqu crashes, and Malibu charges right in...but the big man fires off an elbow that knocks Zack back a step or two. Malibu takes it, then charges in again...right into another elbow from Faqu! This time he takes Zack by the head and readies himself on the middle rope, and sets off with a tornado DDT...but Malibu blocks the move and then powers forward, pushing Faqu across the ring and into the far corner! Malibu then opens up with repeated shoulderblocks on Faqu, then takes him out of the corner and sets up for his own tornado DDT...but Faqu counters his by throwing Zack off, and then nails him with a jumping enzugiri as he makes his way towards him again! Both men are down, but the crowd is on their feet, applauding the gusto of both men as they lay down, recuperating! COLE A lot of energy has been exerted by both men. It's all going to come down to that one fatal blow! Malibu and Faqu soak up whatever energy they can muster as they lay under the bright lights of the arena, with fans, friends and foes all watching on. Almost simultaneously they both push up, both on spaghetti legs...and turn towards each other...AND THAT'S WHEN MALIBU CONNECTS WITH SCHOOL'S OUT! CABOOSE THERE'S THAT FATAL BLOW, MICHAEL! Zack collapses atop Faqu, desperately pulling back on his leg to keep him down, as the crowd chants along with the count. ONE! TWO! THREENO! NO! NO! KICKOUT BY FAQU! COLE HE KICKED OUT! COACH DAMN! The Wildcards look shocked, while The Hooligans gleefully smirk at their bitter rivals. Malibu is disappointed, taking a deep breath because he was just unable to put away the savage with one of his trademark winning moves. He takes Faqu by a handful of hair and drags him to his feet, slapping him lightly as if to get his attention before hitting the ropes...AND RUNNING RIGHT INTO A HARD TWISTING POWERSLAM! Faqu bounces off of Zack and rolls away, leaving him cringing in pain on the canvas. Faqu slowly gets up, visibly favoring his jaw from the School's Out. Malibu pushes up on all fours, but Faqu delivers a running soccer kick to knock Malibu over, then reaches down and picks him up. He sets him for a back suplex, but Zack floats over and spins Faqu around...BUT FAQU REACTS FASTER, PICKING ZACK UP ONTO HIS SHOULDERS... ...DEATH VALLEY DRIVER ON ZACK MALIBU~!~! COLE I think THAT might be your fatal blow, 'boose! Faqu covers, and the crowd breaks from their roar to count along with the referee's hands. ONE! TWO! THREE! DING! DING! DING! COLE He's done it! Faqu has won the HI-YAH Heavyweight Title! The crowd is ecstatic. The Hooligans seem pleased. The Wildcards, however, are disgusted, as the look on their faces tells that they are not happy with what has just transpired. Meanwhile, the referee helps Faqu to his feet and raises his hand, as the door to the cage opens so that Michael Buffer can hand over the championship belt before making the announcement. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winner, and the NEEEEEEEEEEEW HI-YAH HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION...FAAAAAAAAAAAQUUUUUUUUUU! "My Own Summer" plays, but you're barely able to hear it, as the crowd response is wonderful, perhaps the biggest Faqu has gotten in his life. He kisses the center medallion of the belt and then raises it up high, walking to all four sides of the ring to show it off. He saves the aisleway for last, rubbing the belt in the Wildcards faces before putting it over his shoulder and turning away. As he turns, Malibu starts to come up to his knees, holding his head and neck, and with his last ounce of energy, extends a hand to Faqu. COLE Malibu...say what you want about what's gone on lately, but he's got respect. Faqu looks at the hand, and unlike earlier in the night where he slapped it away, this time he simply turns away and exits the cage, leaving Malibu alone. CABOOSE Well he's got the belt, but obviously their friendship needs some work! Faqu exits the cage, first eyeing The Hooligans and giving them a polite nod for their backup. He then turns to The Wildcards, who stare right back at him, and then he walks by, eyeing Blank in particular. The Hooligans follow suit, making sure Faqu's got backup if he needs it, but The Wildcards stay put...except for Cortez, who races to the ring. COLE So much for keeping out of Zack's business. Now here comes Cortez to help Zack. CABOOSE Malibu...man, what are you doing with these guys? Zack, who can barely stand, is aided by Cortez, who starts to help him up...but Zack shoves him away! COLE I don't think he's doing anything, Caboose, look at this! Cortez again tries to help, but Malibu pushes him away again, and now Cortez starts taking it personally. He leans over Malibu and tells him he's just trying to help, and starts to help him to his feet again... ...AND THEN TODD CORTEZ SPIKES ZACK MALIBU WITH THE RIOT ACT PLUS~!~!~!~!~! CABOOSE WHAT THE HELL!? On cue, Bloodshed and Blank storm the cage, with Bloodshed shoving the referee down before shutting the door behind them and locking it! Bloodshed then waves the key around, showing that he stole it from the referee, and then tosses it over the cage wall, out somewhere into the crowd! COLE What are they...no...NO! Blank and Bloodshed eye Cortez, who looks back, and then drags a lifeless Malibu to his feet, shoving him forward...RIGHT INTO A BARBED WIRE BAT SHOT TO THE RIBS~! CABOOSE DAMMIT! Malibu drops and keels over, his abdominal area start to bleed due to the open cuts. As he clutches at his ribs, Blank tells everyone to back up, and then cocks the bat over his head, bringing it down hard across the shoulder blades of Zack Malibu! COACH They're...I mean...I... COLE If the tie wasn't cut before, it's damn SEVERED now! After dropping Zack with the second shot, Blank hands the bat over to Bloodshed, who sits on Zack's back and takes the bat longways, raking the wire into the forehead flesh of the former HI-YAH Heavyweight Champion! Malibu screams in pain as Bloodshed rakes the bat back and forth, causing blood to cake up on the wire, and drip onto the canvas! Blank and Cortez stand over this all and talk trash, and when Bloodshed removes the bat, Blank stomps Zack in the head with his cowboy boot before taking back his prized weapon, now stained with the blood of the OAOAST's favorite son. COLE Malibu, I...I don't know what to say, this is... CABOOSE This is MANSLAUGHTER, Cole! Premeditated manslaughter! Again, Cortez yanks the body of Malibu off the canvas, standing him up so Blank can look him in the eye and tell him "you don't own us" while goozling him. He pushes Malibu back, and now Cortez grabs him by the head and falls to the canvas, trapping Zack in the Street Dreams, while Blank starts jabbing the end of the bat into Zack's ribs! COLE Someone...someone has to help him! CABOOSE WHO? Who is going to help Malibu!? He brought this on himself! I hate to say it...I hate to...but he brought these guys here, and now he's paying the price for it! Cortez doesn't need much effort to put Zack out, as Zack was nearly there. He throws Zack off of him, and together the three Wildcards put their feet to work, stomping Malibu into oblivion before Bloodshed drops to the canvas and turns Malibu onto his back, pounding him just like he did to Scotty Static and staining his fists and forearms with the blood of the prep. The fans look on in horror, and garbage starts filling the ring, or bouncing off the cage walls, while Blank and Cortez parade around, taunting the fans who disprove of their tactics. COLE This is too much! We have...we have to get him out of there! Once again, Zack is pulled up to his feet, with an arm held by Bloodshed and Cortez. Blank spits into his hands and rubs 'em together, then cocks the bat again, running with it and smashing it against Zack's forehead, causing blood to spray over the other two Wildcards, who seem to take plesaure in it! CABOOSE Zack...I don't...look at him... Not an inch of flesh isn't covered with blood, and it's a grisly sight for all...except for The Wildcards, who have enjoyed what they've just done. Finally, whether it's out of mercy or pure boredom, Blank, Cortez, and Bloodshed start climbing the cage wall to exit, with Blank leaving his bat behind as a memory for Malibu. Right next to him, the very weapon that just put Zack Malibu through the worst hell of his life lays stained with his blood, as our cameras fade out on what's left of Zack Malibu.

Ooooooooh boy. Blank asked if he could use Los Diablos this week, and I okayed it last week!

We usually try to have everything done by 8pm EST at the very latest, because the show usually goes up anywhere between 9-11 depending on what PK's up to.

I've liked these guys for a little while. "Carry On" is a pretty good.

Smek'd.

I get it.

It's because I wasn't there by 12 like usual. Sorry!

The "Candie's pregnant" story didn't get forgotten. The "due date" hasn't passed or anything, so as far as everyone's concerned she's at home getting ready for the baby's arrival.

PK didn't finish his feedback. Liar!

It's up in HE. I've gotta work today, so I'll have to scan in from there.

COLE “What the? Are we scheduled to go backstage right now?” COACH “Nah dawg.” COLE “Well none the less I’ve been told that we’re going backstage where one of the Wildcards has something to say." We’re whisked backstage where Bruce Blank has cornered an OAOAST camera man as he apparently has something to say. BRUCE BLANK “Alright listen up and listen up good each and everyone of you because you better remember this.” Bruce grabs the camera by the edge and points it up straight at his face as he gets in real close. BRUCE BLANK “Certain people in this here piss-ant federation has questioned what I am doing here, what Cortez and Bloodshed are doing here! They say we’ve gone too far, that we’re uncontrollable, brutes, savages.” COLE “After what happened at School’s Out I definitely agree with them." BRUCE BLANK “Well you know what? I’m offended! I’m offended that you’d try and control me, I’m offended by people who tell me what I can or cannot do! It’s obvious that most of you don’t know me, don’t know what I’m all about. Well I’m gonna show you." Bruce starts to walk down the hallway dragging the reluctant camera guy behind him. BRUCE BLANK “I’m going to show you and YOU better just keep filming it! Ya’ll have heard me referred to as the King of Pain, I’m the pre-miere Ultraviolent wrestler in the world!" COACH “What the hell is Ultraviolent wrestling?” CABOOSE “I’m afraid to ask.” BRUCE BLANK “Now I know a lot of you out there are familiar with Hardore and what not, forget Hardcore. Hardcore is a term that’s been watered down by the use of tin foil baking trays and Singapore canes that are all sound and no impact. Hardcore is a fad, a passing phase, I’m here to bring you something that goes 10 steps beyond that! I’m here to bring you Ultraviolence like only I can.” Bruce stops outside a door that reads “Hi-Gate”. BRUCE BLANK “Hardcore is just an excuse to not follow the rules – ULTRA VIOLENCE IS AN EXCUSE TO HURT YOUR OPPONENTS!! And that’s what I do best, I hurt, I maim, I cripple and I love every single second of it and I’m about to give ya’ll a little deee-monstration!” Bruce knocks on the door to the locker room where the Hi-Gate wrestlers are supposed to change tonight. The door opens and a man in a slivery and black mask with a red X on it opens the door. COLE “That’s Ultimo Villaño X! He’s supposed to make his debut tonight or Hi-Gate wrestling!” BRUCE BLANK “Hi there, I’m Bruce Blank – the official welcoming committee for the OAOAST! Welcome to the federation!” Bruce holds out his hand with a huge fake smile on his face as Ultimo Villaño X just stares at him trying to figure out what he said. But the big man seems friendly enough and Villaño doesn’t want to offend anyone so he puts his hand in Bruce’s and shakes it unaware of what lies ahead of him. Bruce’s smile falters and his eyes turn hard as Bruce grips Villaño’s hand tight and then whips him across the hallway Sending Ultimo Villaño X forward crashing head first into a door. *CRASH!* COLE “He’s insane!!” COACH “Come on now you can’t just attack someone backstage! Only the Upstarts are allowed to do that!” The door flies off it’s hinges and Villaño stumbles onto the floor of one of the dressing rooms with a tear all the way down one side of his mask and a small gash that’s starting to bleed on the side of his cheek. Bruce appears in the doorway just moments later and opens the cut even deeper as he kicks Villaño right in the face with his cowboy boot! COLE “I wonder who’s dressing room that is.” COACH “I’m not s…” Coach is interrupted when Bruce slams Villaño’s head against one of the lockers and pops it open from the impact! CABOOSE “Is that a blue and gold hooded jacket in the locker? This isn’t. . . ??” A moment later Bruce provides everyone at home with another clue to who the locker room occupant is as he pulls a gold belt out of the locker and cracks Ultimo Villaño X over the head with it with great delight! COLE “The HI-YAH title! That’s the HI-YAH title!! It must be Zack Malibu’s locker room.” CABOOSE “How dare he TOUCH that title it’s not one of those cheapo SWF titles!! Zack left it locked up in his room and now this asshole is degrading it.” Bruce just drops the belt on the floor not really paying attention to what it was he hit Villaño X with and keeps up the assault. Bruce drops an elbow to the back of Ultimo Villaño X’s head and then tosses his helpless victim into the hallway once again. COACH “Man Zack is going to be PISSED when he returns to his locker room and finds the mess they’ve made!” CABOOSE “I think the mess is the least of it COLE after what went down between them earlier tonight and all.” BRUCE BLANK “Now as you can all see this kid here wasn’t prepared for Ultraviolence – he in many ways represents this federation and all those here who have been taken by surprise by our actions. This kid – like the OAOAST is STUPID! You need to be on your feet at all times, you need to be prepared.” Bruce ducks down and easily lifts the much smaller Ultimo Villaño X up in the air and drops backwards bouncing his helpless victim’s head off the side of a trash can with a loud crash. Bruce then gets to his feet, wipes a bit of blood off his hands and then turns back to the camera to do a bit of running commentary while he beats the guy up. BRUCE BLANK “You see I know exactly what I am and where my strengths lie – I can’t beat you with an arm bar so I don’t even try. I am what I am, I don’t pretend to be something else and I don’t appreciate being told what to do.” CABOOSE “I can’t believe this! The guy was just minding his own business, getting ready to debut later tonight and Bruce just blindsided him!” COLE “This is sick! There is absolutely no need for this at all!” Bruce grabs Ultimo Villaño X by the mask and the trunks and easily Gorilla presses the small Japanese wrestler over his head before dropping him from the gorilla press onto his shoulder and then slams Villaño X straight into a metal door driving the you man through it sending both wrestlers into the two level lobby of the arena in Salt Lake City. Bruce grabs Villaño by the back of the mask and then throws the helpless Hi-Gate wrestler through the open door and onto the floor of the men’s room. COLE “Well thank god it wasn’t the Ladies’ room or we could have been sued for sexual harassment!” COACH “Oh get real, it’s a wrestling show – if there isn’t at least one fight in the bathrooms then it’s just a bad show.” Bruce follows up the attack as he bounces Ultimo Villaño X off one of the stall walls and then whips him into one of the sinks, breaking the sink and busting the mirror with his face cutting the mask and his skin in several places. *CRASH!* Bruce turns to one of the other sinks, turns the water on and then begins to wash the blood off his hands as he whistles a happy little Lynyrd Skynyrd tune without paying any attention to Ultimo Villaño X. The Japanese wrestler is staggered, he’s bleeding and he’s eyeing a way out as he slowly staggers towards the exit. But his escape is cut short when a bathroom stall door opens and the Hi-Gate wrestler is pulled inside and the door is locked. A series of loud crashes and bangs is heard from behind the locked door. COLE “What the hell is going on?” COACH "Maybe he had to go to the bathroom? Give the guy some privacy” Bruce just keeps washing his hands, totally ignoring the sounds of someone being severely beaten that’s emanating from the bathroom stall. Once he’s done washing Bruce takes a couple of paper towels and casually wipes his hands off before addressing the camera man. BRUCE BLANK “When you’re working the Ultraviolent style you have to be extra careful about hygiene.” Moments later the door is opened again and Ultimo Villaño is thrown out of the stall and then the door is slammed shut again hard. CABOOSE “Was that Bloodshed? I saw Bloodshed in that stall!” COACH “I wouldn’t doubt it, they’re all freaks!” Bruce has had time to catch his breath, freshen up and is ready to take over the kicking of the poor helpless Ultimo Villaño X’s ass. Bruce wraps his hands around Villaño’s throat and lifts him up in the air before tossing him into a bathroom stall breaking the toilet spilling water everywhere. *FLUSH!!* Bruce then grabs Ultimo Villaño X by the hand and drags him out from the bathroom back into the lobby once more, smiling at the people who run away scared. Bruce then drags Villaño across the upper level of the lobby where the fighting has taken place so far, towards the stairs to the lower level where the concessions stands are. CABOOSE “This can’t be good!” COLE “Bruce with Ultimo Villaño X up on his shoulder for a power slam? No that’s not good at all. Bruce runs at the rail and then tosses Ultimo Villaño X over the edge dropping him the approximately 15 feet down to the next level. Villño flies through the air sending the people working the refreshment stand right below them scurrying everywhere. Seconds later he comes crashing down right through one of their tables! *CRASH!* Sending popcorn and hot dogs flying everywhere as Ultimo Villaño X pulverizes the table. On the upper level Bruce Blank looks over the edge and just smiles at his handy work looking awfully pleased with himself. BRUCE BLANK “I guess I should have warned them – woops” COLE “HOW CAN HE JOKE AT A TIME LIKE THIS!!” CABOOSE “Cause he’s an animal, he’s a freak who likes to hurt other people Cole.” COACH “Alright I’m serious here, this isn’t about Originals or Upstarts or Wildcards – this guy is certifiably NUTS alright?” COLE “For once I agree with you”! Bruce casually saunters down the steps to the concession stand portion of the lobby and then pulls Ultimo Villaño X out of the rubble. COLE “Oh lord I’m not sure I can stand to watch much more of this!” COACH “Well then why don’t you run backstage and stop him? Go on now I’ll hold your headset." Bruce picks up Villaño X and throws him against the glass door that leads to the outside hoping to toss him right through it. *THUD!* Ultimo Villaño smacks against the glass but doesn’t break it, instead he flops down and smacks against the floor in a really awkward angle. Bruce looks a bit annoyed that the glass didn’t break the first time so he grabs Villaño around the waist and then suplexes him up and over his head THROUGH the glass door! *CRASH!!* Ultimo Villaño X’s head bounces off the pavement as Bruce releases the suplex and then gets back to his feet, wiping his hands like his job was done. BRUCE BLANK “Now that’s how we take out the trash in the SWF, that’s how I earned the name “the King of Pain” – and that’s how I do business!! Ain’t no one going to come here and tell me what I can or cannot do, I’m Bruce Blank, Bitch!" COLE “Can we please go to a commercial break?” *Fade to commercial*

This one should come right after the theme song. COLE Welcome fans to what is already shaping up to be an eventful night here on HeldDOWN~! I'm Michael Cole, and...and that's Zack Malibu coming down to the ring right now! The crowd roars as Malibu surprises them by storming down to the ring, minus his theme music, and certainly not dressed for a fight while clad in jeans, flip flops, and a T-shirt. Still, the HI-YAH Heavyweight Champion looks none too happy as he snatches the microphone from Michael Buffer, and heads into the ring. MALIBU I am SICK to my stomach of what's going on here lately. You've got guys in the back, ready to kill each other, barely being held back, and all fingers of blame point to me. Whether that's the case or not, we're going to get it all out of our systems right now. Security, whoever, let them out here, the whole lot of them. GPX, Faqu, Blonde, Blank, Cortez and Bloodshed, all of you out here, NOW! CABOOSE I know he's fearless, but Malibu has just called out SEVEN MEN who aren't on good terms with him! COLE Four at least, however we're still not sure where The Wildcards stand, especially after Todd Cortez was responsible for Malibu retaining his HI-YAH Championship this past Sunday at School's Out! Nearly a minute goes by before anyone steps through the curtain, and when it swings open, it's The Wildcards making their way out. The crowd starts to boo heavily, with a minimum smattering of cheers as Bruce Blank, Todd Cortez and Bloodshed head to the ring. COACH About time these fans woke up and saw these guys for what they are! CABOOSE Coach, I never thought I'd see the day you and I agreed on something, but it appears that our reservations on these guys were with just cause. What they did to Jamie O'Hara this past Sunday was sickening! The Wildcards step into the ring, with Malibu glaring at the men he brought into the company. The Global Party Exchange, minus their third Hooligan tonight, come down the aisle next, ranting and raving at Malibu. Lastly, Blonde and Faqu come down the aisle, and Blonde tries to be the cooler head of the two, as he tries to stop Faqu from charging the ring! The big Samoan hits the ring and stampedes toward Zack...but Bruce Blank puts an arm out and cuts him off! COLE Oooooh no. Now incensed, Faqu knocks the arm away of the hardcore icon and stares him down! The crowd buzzes in anticipation of the two monsters hooking up, but Malibu steps in and pushes both back, seperating them. MALIBU STOP IT! STOP IT, DAMMIT! Blank and Faqu seperate, each eyeing each other, as Malibu steps back and addresses friend and foe alike. MALIBU For weeks now, I've been a human target. Every time something goes wrong...EVERY TIME, I become the scapegoat, and I suck it up. I try to make it right...I ALWAYS try to make it right...and then things go wrong. Emotions overload, and certain people who do NOT BELONG IN MY BUSINESS get involved, and the vicious circle just continues. Malibu eyes Cortez in particular, apparently not happy with Cortez's "divine intervention" that saved his HI-YAH Championship for him. MALIBU And then...then...then things get out of hand, don't they? I give people an inch, and they take mile...after mile...AFTER MILE AFTER MILE, DON'T THEY!? Now filled with rage, Malibu confronts Bruce Blank, whose trademark snicker becomes a scowl when he realizes that Malibu is putting blame on his shoulders. MALIBU What happened to Jamie O'Hara...you can believe me or not...but that wasn't my call. I brought these guys in to back me up, because of what you two were doing. I brought them in because you never saw it coming. I did NOT bring these guys in to turn this company into a traveling crime scene! I wanted three badasses, three fearless people...NOT three vampires whose bloodlust is on MY head! So n... As Malibu turns, Cortez reaches over his shoulder and yanks the mic from his hands, now just as incensed as Malibu appears to be. CORTEZ Now hang on just a second, Zack. What's the matter now, huh? You getting cold feet...squeamish maybe? You're a man who does his homework, Zack, and I've said this before...you KNEW what you were doing when you got the three of us signed, and now because we look bad on your resume, because we're bad for your rep...you wanna cut the tie? You're gonna use us until you've got no use for us anymore, like we're your whores? You can go fu... Malibu, saving the OAOAST from a censorship suit, snatches the mic back from the Urban Legend. MALIBU YOU LISTEN TO ME. I got you in, and you did your part...you MORE than did your part. I told you the first time out, after Living Angleously, that you needed to rein it in, and what do you do? You...STAPLE a kid up? You let even MORE blood stain this mat, going against what I say? I might not legally be your boss...any of your bosses really...but after all I've done I at the VERY LEAST command your respect...and right now, Cortez, whether I have the respect of you and your boys...you DON'T have mine. The Wildcards collective mood drops, as now none of the three look happy with Malibu. MALIBU Now, speaking of the interference the other night...you, Faqu, are going to hear me out on this one. The other night, we put on a hell of a match, one of the best the company ever saw...and it was never...NEVER (as Malibu turns back to look at Cortez) supposed to go down that way. You two have worked your asses off to get back in the game and make something of yourselves, and I respect you both for that incredibly. So you can think of me what you want, but I'm going to make good. Next week, Faqu, you're getting another shot, one on one for the HI-YAH Heavyweight Title! The crowd roars, and while Faqu looks pacified, he's far from pleased. MALIBU I don't expect that to erase everything that's gone on, but it's the least I can do for you...and to make sure that EVERYONE stay out of our business, we're gonna make sure it's mano y mano...because we'll be surrounded by a FIFTEEN FOOT HIGH STEEL CAGE! COACH YO~! CABOOSE Now THAT'S a main event! Faqu vs. Malibu next week, in a steel cage! Faqu and Malibu have a staredown briefly, before Malibu turns away and addresses the GPX. MALIBU Now you two...you think what you want of me, but I know how you are. You guys like to jump the gun and act before you think. So I'll tell you what...you wanna come at me, I'll be ready for you. To tell you the truth, I expect it. But you go after them (Malibu points to The Wildcards)...and I give you my blessing to! COLE WOW. CABOOSE Malibu...I think Malibu just officially cut his ties to The Wildcards! Blank, angered at this turn of events, grabs the microphone when Malibu is about to hand it over to Scotty Static. BLANK So that's how it is, eh Zack? That's your gratitude, you wanna sell us out for these two prettyboys? You don't get it, do you? This is...this like a marriage, Zack. You did for us, we do for you. You got us into the OAOAST and we're grateful for it...so grateful that...that I'm gonna let what you just said slide. We're still gonna have your back, Zack, don't you worry...but you DON'T TELL ME OR MY BOYS WHAT WE CAN AND CAN'T DO. You might be the poster boy, you might be the superstar, but one thing you're not Zack, is hardcore. Ultraviolent. You're weak, just like these four boys right here. You can't handle the dirty work, and that's why you called us in. Because we've got a history of violence. Because that's what we're KNOWN for...and the fact that you people boo us doesn't mean you don't like us, we don't take it personally...because we know it means you're AFRAID. You're all afraid...and Zack, that fear...that lump in the back of your throat right now, it's with good reason. So you settle your differences by spouting some lines and playing politician, Zack...we settle ours the old fashioned way, like cowboys at high noon, or like two street gangs in a turf war...we go out and get blood on our hands. That's our mark. That's our calling. No matter what you say, Zack...no matter how you try to control us...just face it...you've opened up your heart and soul, your precious company, to be our bloody playground. Blank shoves the mic into Malibu's chest, and The Wildcards exit upon Blank waving them on. All three stare back at Zack, Blonde, Faqu and the GPX as they head up the aisle to thunderous boos, leaving the remaining talent in the ring to reflect on that cryptic message from their spokesman, Bruce Blank.

I'd like for this to be the very first segment on the show, pre-theme song and all. As soon as the hour hits, we're backstage live at HeldDOWN~!, where things are already out of hand! On one side of the backstage area are James Blonde, Faqu, and the Global Party Exchange, trying to fight through the wall of OAOAST staff, roster members, and arena security to get at The Wildcards, who continue to taunt and shout down their opposition. "Your mine, you hear me, Cortez!? You're MINE for what you did!" shouts Faqu angrily, as he seeks vengeance for the Urban Legend's role in his defeat this past Sunday. "You boys got some issues, c'mon and git some then!" challenges Bruce Blank, snickering as if this is a game. "We're gonna get you! We're gonna get you for what you did to J!" yells Scotty Static in representation of The Hooligans, who had to witness their ally Jamie O'Hara get treated as a pin cushion courtesy of a staple gun. The shouting continues, and things look to be breaking down...and then Zack Malibu, then man that has been called the cause for all of this turmoil, appears on screen. Malibu pauses, surveying what's going on, as all eyes are on him. Faqu appears to be the most incensed by this, as he tries to break through the barrier to get at his "friend". "ZACK! Zack, you owe me, Zack. You cheated me out of that title!" Malibu lowers his sunglasses, walks right up to Faqu, and looks him in the eye. Just a moment later, Malibu walks past him, out of view, as we fade into the opening theme song.

So that means this year there'd be two Zero Hours? If we're gonna start off small, we can start with License To Pin being taken off the schedule this year. That way we build from GAB to Angleslam.

I did read this earlier, plus KC PM'd me about other stuff (which I'll reply to eventually today dude, fear not) and I've been giving it thought. My thoughts are somehwat like PK's. Omit Zero Hour, License To Pin, Dirty Deeds for sure. I had figured to eliminate November Reign as well, because Climax is a Starrcade type event, IMO, with the November event being more expendable. Unless you want the final HD of December to come off as a Clash of the Champions type deal as the year-ender. If we keep November Reign, I say omit World Without End as well, that way from AngleSlam to November Reign, we can build up quite a bit for a blowout year end PPV, and perhaps another special in between those (end of Sept./beginning of October)?

There's a ton of fallout from School's Out, and again, it all falls on Zack Malibu's head. The Wildcards again took it too far, brutalizing The Hooligans in their Six Man Title defense, not to mention Todd Cortez getting involved in Zack Malibu's HI-YAH Title defense! Is the tension between the two parties real, or is Malibu reverting back to his old ways? Will The Hooligans recover in time to speak their peace? And what of James Blonde and Faqu, whose respect for Zack is nearly non-existent now? We'll find out this Thursday!

Feedback~! -Nice kickoff with the HI-YAH Tag Team Title match. Purple denim? Jeez, I remember my purple jeans...in 1992. Silk shirts too. Where was I? Oh yeah. Nice opener, as in real life this'd be the kind of match you'd want to kick off a PPV. Love how the NNMX aren't the NNMX anymore, yet Ned's still the sleaziest son of a bitch around. Good near falls written towards the end, and now looks like Ned has another victim to his credit. Will big brother stick up for lil' sis? TUNE INTO NITR...er, HeldDOWN~! to find out! -Entertaining use of Mister Warrior in the Sunday Detention match. Admittedly the match went by pretty quick, which I suppose is good for a reader. It was well done, it just left me wanting some more. -Good little tag title match, which served to get Brains and Brawn over as more than just a throwaway team. Good effort involved in the writing to make them look like a threat before going down to the Rockers. -Looks like Sly channeled The Great Khali and Daivari with the appearance of Gibraltar, which is quite the coincidence as when I was typing up Zack's history in the new chat thread, remembered the big man aiding my Thrillogy at one time. Two years ago to be exact! Time has flown...think about it...we're nearing FIVE YEARS of the OAOAST. Match-wise, I envisioned your typical Impact X-Division match here, which is not a bad thing at all. -Brief promo from Otaku, but even the little things can be used to build up something big. I think MMOM is capable of some very good writing, it's just the other things that interfere. When he gets the chance, he'll please us all I'm sure. -I won't say too too much about the Six Man, as I had much of a hand in the story development. I will say that I was incredibly pleased with Bruce and Rando's effort (I wrote nothing for the six man, instead allowing them to focus their abilities, and allowing me to get the HI-YAH Title match done). Bruce asked if he could take liberties with the ending and I agreed, as The Wildcards wave of brutality continues in a big way...whether the OAOAST likes it or not. -I'll say nothing about my own match, but this: I should have gotten the "new" stats up for Blonde and Faqu, because poor Papacita only had the old ones to work with. At any rate, I've really tried to make this angle more than just a "Zack vs. secondary characters" feud as some can come across...I had an interest in fleshing out Blonde and Faqu and I hope this match did that, as I worked hard to go for a strong-style/ROHish type of classic. Believe me though, the story didn't end here, folks. -Exciting main event from Alf and PK. Admittedly, I expected more spottasticness, but in the end, less is more. I remember a few months back when PK recommended the idea for this match as a way for he and I to feud, but he had a chance to use it here and help get Alf's reign over. The buyrate for this might break Alf out of his lowest drawing OAOAST Champion funk!

Doane's clearly the one they're high on, as he's considered being better than both Cena and Orton were when they were at his level. Of course at that point they were still polishing themselves in OVW and not on TV. The call-up situation really hit a fast forward in the last two years. Hopefully he doesn't let it go to his head and can keep his ego in check (stories are rampant about how many of the guys he came up with in OVW can't stand him anymore). Jeter I wouldn't call a main event player, but he could easily slide into the "credible" midcard scene (meaning a guy like Masters, Haas, etc., not guys like Cade, Conway or Eugene) on his own. I wouldn't mind seeing them reenact the Jeter/Capotelli angle with Kenny and Johnny as a way to split the Squad up sometime...while they wouldn't have Heyman's hand in booking it, it may be a good approach. The Jeter/Cap stuff was excellent.

For Jeter and Doane, that could be a very good thing. The others pretty much need something like the Squad because they're either bland like Nemeth and Mitchell, or would only be taken as a comedy heel like Mondo is.

No. Elijah Burke was recruited for the gimmick, but turned it down and said he'd continue on in OVW until something better came along.

Uh, the three way is in GCF where it's always been!

Best of the Bloodiest Brawls is good entertainment because you get the Triple X/AMW cage match (the second one, with the cagewalk rana spot), both Monster's Balls, the Sabu/Abyss barbed wire match, Styles/Abyss Lockdown cage match, and some other good stuff.

Wait, what? Wasn't it pretty much assumed that the whole Booker T-Batista "fight" was some sort of Internet work to give Batista a program for when he returns? And even if it wasn't, what would Booker T care about Batista doing anything with Melina? In last week's WON, it states that the fight stemmed from Batista's holier than thou attitude. Booker called him on it (IIRC Batista talked about Smackdown being inferior to RAW, which is ironic given Booker's original SD gimmick) and they got into it. Melina, who as mentioned supposedly has something going with Batista, or at least did, also got into a brawl with Sharmell at a house show that caused JBL to intervene. I also believe it was in Australia that Melina pissed more than a few people off because she was called into the dreaded "Wrestler's Court". She's apparently been on the shitlist for some time.

I've never heard anything of the sort. When did this come out? Every reason given for the split has had to do with punishing Nitro and Melina and getting them on RAW so they're out of the SD locker room.

MICHAEL BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen…the following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL with NO time limit and is for the OAOAST WORLD SIX MAN TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP!! The voice of Michael Buffer sounds out over the arena, causing what was once a mix of murmurs to turn into a giant overwhelming round of cheers and chants in anticipation of what promises to be an incredibly heated match. COLE Here we go everybody, this is going to get violent. COACH I don’t think you should even be in the room for this, Michael. This might get R rated in a hurry and you know you have a problem with blood. . . ya pansy. The opening chords and bass drops of Cassidy’s “I’m A Hustla” explodes over the PA as the lighting in Denver goes absolutely crazy, flickering and strobing and heralding the arrival of… MICHAEL BUFFER Introducing first…the challengers…making their way to the ring at this time…weighing in at a combined five hundred and ninety five pounds… SCOTTY STATIC…JOHHNY JAX…JAMIE O’HARA…they are…THE HOOOOOOLIGANS!! The group of break-away Upstarts appears from behind the curtain, much to the dismay of the crowd, who boos them relentlessly as they make their way to the ring, brushing off every single one of the few high-fives and outstretched hands that happen to be there as they keep jawing at the fans and at every camera they pass that the gold is as good as theirs. CABOOSE This is it. We are going to see these three men take back what is rightful property of the OAOAST. If these three SWF wrestlers can come in and here and do what they have been doing these past few weeks, who knows what the future holds! COLE BRET HART TO LED THE INVASION~!111!! NUDE PICTURES TRISH STRATUS! CLICK HERE NOW!! COACH What the hell is wrong with you? COLE Sorry. Too much Pepsi Max. CABOOSE Well that explains a lot. With a leap, Jamie O’Hara hits the apron as the Global Party Exchange takes their time to walk up the ring steps, each climbing through the ropes at nearly the same moment as they turn their attention back to the curtain, all in fighting stance. COLE All three of them can’t start this match! What are they doing? COACH You think after what has been going on these past few weeks that anyone should trust what those SWF idiots are capable of? COLE Good point, Coach…and here we go… The opening throes of “Oh No” break out across the arena and the building goes dark, two spotlights left behind, one shining to the ring, the other to the stage… BUFFER And there opponents…they weigh in at a combined seven hundred and fifty six pounds…they are known as the King of Pain, The Bloody Prophet, and the Urban Legend… they are BRUCE BLANK, BLOODSHED, and TODD CORTEZ…THE WILDCAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS! From behind the curtain steps Bruce Blank and Todd Cortez, with Blank’s torso showcasing two titles as Cortez raises the third in the air for the entire arena to see. The image of three OAOAST titles in the possession of men who’s loyalties lie with a different federation only serves to enrage the crowd even more as they boo and jeer the two men on their way to the ring. COLE Where is Bloodshed? I don’t see him! CABOOSE The Hooligans are panicking! Look at them they’re trying to figure out where Bloodshed is. In the ring, Static is spinning himself in circles, looking in every direction for the third Wildcard. Around him, O’Hara and Jax stand guard, almost unaware of the duo slowly making their way to the ring. COACH This is nothing but mind games! Horrible mind games! Just as Blank and Cortez hit the ringside area, the double spotlights extinguish for just a moment, shrouding the arena in darkness before a hard flash of pyrotechnics explodes from each ring post in a decidedly loud… BOOOOOOOOM! …returning the lights to their normal radiance in time to see Scotty Static spin himself around and right into the path of Bloodshed and Bloodshed’s trademark… BLOODMIST~! COACH/COLE MY GOD! CABOOSE COLE An already bloodied Bloodshed has started this match off with yet another mist right into the eyes of Scotty Static! He’s blinded! As Static grabs at his faces and flails wildly, falling to his back in anguish, O’Hara and Jax attack Bloodshed, throwing punches toward the bloody Wildcard. COACH LOOK OUT! Coach’s call can fortunately or unfortunately not be heard by the duo in the ring, who find themselves trapped around the waist by Blank and Cortez, who quickly lift up and drive down the remaining Hooligans with stereo german suplexes! The referee hits the ring, quick to admonish the tactics of the SWF contingency, but they simply shrug it off, Bloodshed wiping the blood from his face and Cortez turning his back to the official, both men heading over to their own corner, leaving the larger Blank by himself to start the match. He grabs at Johnny Jax, pulling him up and kicking O’Hara out of the ring before screaming at the ref to ring the bell. *DING DING DING* COLE And after decimating and possibly blinding the three members of the Hooligans, the biggest dog in this fight has got Johnny Jax in his clutches and things don’t seem as though they are going to be looking up for the Hooligans any time soon. COACH They should have been disqualified before this match even began, all of ‘em! CABOOSE I don’t see you jumping up to help them out, Coach. COACH I could say the same for you. CABOOSE Well I’m retired, so there COLE Oh would you two just stop! Stop or get a room In the ring, Jax finds himself coming off the ropes with authority before being drilled in the chest with a hard shoulder block from Blank, dropping him to the canvas with an unsatisfying smack. Bruce is quick to make a cover, but before the ref can even try to get to his knees, O’Hara is in the ring, kicking the back of Blank’s head, causing the monster to jump to his feet with what little quickness he has, pointing his right hand out and almost begging for Jamie to, as they say, “bring it”. COLE Uh Oh! I don’t think that is what O’Hara wants! CABOOSE Totally distraction city! COACH/COLE What? CABOOSE Look, you idiots! As Caboose points, Bruce takes one too many steps toward the illegal O’Hara, giving Johnny Jax enough time to get back to his feet and send as much force as he can through his shoulder and into the back of Blank’s knee, Chop blocking him down as the referee calls for Jamie to exit, which he does, his hands in the air in innocence. COACH That’s the kind of thing that is going to keep this match fair! COLE You call that fair? COACH Well, I don’t call spitting blood into someone’s face fair either! COLE The match hadn’t started! CABOOSE Static is looking a little better over there. On the apron, Static has made it to his knees, his face a mix of green tinge and red blood, his hand slightly outstretched for his partner’s tag, but as Blank pulls himself up he is caught in a headlock by Jax, who does his best to hold on. It only works for a moment though, as Bruce pushes up and stands up while raising O’Hara into the air, With a twists he uses all his strength to send Johnny flying as he tosses him out of the headlock but straight into the Hooligan corner! COLE Blind tag made by O’Hara! The referee is in plain view of the tag off Jax’s back as O’Hara leaps to the top turnbuckle and jumps off, sending both of his feet into Blank’s back before quickly somersaulting off, landing on his feet in the middle of the ring and taunting Cortez and Bloodshed. The bloody one moves through the ropes despite Cortez’s protests, and is quickly pushed back by the referee, leaving the Hooligans in perfect position for some payback as both O’Hara and Jax attack with kicks in the corner, keeping the big man grounded as they target his knee. Jax exits the ring as O’Hara makes his way back toward the Wildcard corner, taunting them once more before the referee turns around in time to see O’Hara’s boots catching the downed Blank square in the jaw, the dropkick causing loud “Oooh”s from the Denver crowd. COACH That is exactly what they need to do to get any headway against Bruce. Keep that big lug down and do what they can to keep him from making it back to his corner. Blank outweighs everyone in the ring by at least 65 pounds if not more, but on his back he’s no bigger than anyone else. COLE Sound strategy for certain, but Blank already looks to be getting back up! Cole’s call is correct, as Bruce is doing what he can to fight off the smaller O’Hara as he attacks with a flurry of kicks. As Bruce gets back to his knees, Jamie hits the opposite side of the ring, flying off the ropes and leaping into the air, aiming for a second dropkick… OOMPH! With a grunt, Bruce Blank’s arm flies up, kicking the legs of O’Hara out of the air and sending him down to the canvas. COLE Never seen a dropkick blocked like that before, just swatted him out of the air. CABOOSE One time in Alaska I saw it. Polar bear did it to a skinny looking Eskimo. COACH Yeah right. CABOOSE I got the scars to prove it! He was my tag team partner and that bear went after me next! With Coach and Caboose arguing at ringside and starting to share scars like they are the cast of Jaws 9, Cole is the only one paying attention as Bruce makes his way back to his feet at the same moment as O’Hara, the two standing in each other’s way to their corner. After a pause, the two men go into a tie-up, the larger Blank easily pushing back on Jamie, who does his best to gets his feet working to his advantage, pulling himself to the side and trying to pull Bruce along. The reluctant giant gets wind of this rather quickly, and with a loud grunt, Jamie finds himself in the air once more, his legs kicking at the stomach of Blank as he spins around and throws O’Hara out and into the middle of the ring. The spry O’Hara lands on his feet like a cat, only to catch a HARD lariat that sends him around, flipping through the air like a top, or dreidel if that is your thing, before crashing to the mat much to the dismay of his teammates, who begin screaming for a tag. Back on his feet, Scotty’s eyes blink from O’Hara to Bloodshed, who is nonchalantly watching the action next to Cortez as Blank’s imposing figure moves to the Hooligan corner, his hands asking the GPX to join him much like O’Hara did moments ago. Jax makes a move to come through the ropes, but Blank swings down, his club of a forearm barely missing Jax as he pulls himself back at the last possible second. Blank gives the feisty fighter a cute smile before turning himself back to O’Hara, who is back up to his feet and heading at him, jumping up for a splash! COLE He’s caught! Coach and Caboose finally stop arguing in time to see Jamie’s head bounce off the top turnbuckle thanks to some Snake Eyes courtesy of Bruce Blank. O’Hara recoils back to the middle of the ring and Bruce follows, stepping over the downed Hooligan and yawning, his hand going over his mouth as he reaches out, tagging in Todd Cortez with a hint of utter relaxation and boredom. COACH Is Bruce going to go to sleep over there? The Global Party Exchange and Jamie O’Hara aren’t three guys you want to take lightly. CABOOSE I don’t think Bruce Blank *can* take anything lightly. Look at him. He has a bigger gut than Cole’s boyfriend. COLE …you *bleep* CANNED CROWD OOOOOOOOOOOO! CABOOSE Dude, take a joke. We know you can take other things. Michael Cole fumes a bit and Coach laughs as Todd Cortez and Bruce Blank switch places, Cortez hopping over the top rope and into the ring legally for the first time in the match as O’Hara gets back up to his feet. COLE (Ignoring the others) right now we’re having a flashback to Heldown a few weeks ago where Cortez and O’Hara faced off in a street fight Cortez and O’Hara are face to face, jawing at each other as the intensity between the two competitor’s build pulling the fans to the edge of their seats. Jaime O’Hara makes a belt motion that only seems to enrage the Urban Legend as he responds by drawing a thumb across his throat to indicate his intentions for O’Hara and the rest of the Hooligans. Of course O’Hara makes the only appropriate response there is to make COACH That’s showin’ him J-Dawg!! CABOOSE Did he just call him #1? COLE I doubt it. CABOOSE Yeah that was called a joke. Cortez tries to lock up with O’Hare but the Upstart ducks under Cortez’s arms and lands a spinning leg lariat to the back of the Urban Legend knocking him forward a few steps into the ropes. O’Hara runs at Cortez but the Urban Legend clasps his hand around O’Hara’s throat and lifts him up straight in the air for what looks like a choke bomb. Using his forward momentum O’Hara succeeds in spinning the choke bomb attempt around so he lands with his feet on the middle ropes in the corner instead. Jamie quickly kicks Todd Cortez in the chest to knock the Wildcarder back and then a split second later drop kicks Cortez square in the chest, knocking him into the opposite corner. CABOOSE They’re putting it in high gear right off the bat! COACH As if there was any doubt that my boys would show those savages how it’s done in OAOAST! With Cortez hanging off the ropes in the corner O’Hara quickly rushes in, leaps up on Todd’s bent knee but when he tries to kick Cortez in the back of the head with an shinning wizard like move the Urban Legend bobs his head out of the way so that O’Hara ends up sitting on his shoulders instead. The Birmingham bad boy throws all of his weight forward and manages to roll his opponent up with a victory roll. ONE!! TWO!! But an enraged Cortez kicks out before the referee’s hand goes down for the 3rd count. COLE Much, much to early to get a pin on Cortez CABOOSE I have to agree, I mean no one here likes the Wildcards but they don’t just roll over and die. Cortez quickly locks up with O’Hara in the middle of the ring as the two struggle for the upper hand. Max uses his height to push Jamie back into the corner against the ropes. Cortez slowly backs off as the referee begins to count for a rope break, he’s got his hands in the air prepared to defend himself giving O’Hara a clean break with a smirk on his face. COACH What the hell? CABOOSE Maybe he feels he doesn’t NEED to cheat? COACH Yeah right he’ll be cheating in a moment when my boys dismantle him. Jamie O’Hara quickly runs at Cortez trying to gain the momentum back after the clean break but the Urban Legend manages to hook O’Hara and drive him into the canvas with a power slam. Then he backs up a few steps to get a running start as he flips over Jamie’s head and snaps his head forward in one smooth motion. Cortez turns towards the Upstarts and flips them both off with a huge grin. CABOOSE Okay he needs to focus on his opponent more! He has him down and all. COACH You’d like nothing better than to see the Hooligans wouldn’t you? Are you secretly working for the SWF? CABOOSE Oh don’t be ridiculous. O’Hara slowly gets back to his feet before Cortez decides to take another shot at him. Jamie reaches back and blindly tags in Johnny Jax while Todd Cortez runs right at him. O’Hara ducks under the attack from Cortez allowing his tag-team partner to come flying off the top rope with a cross body block into a cover on the totally unprepared Urban Legend. ONE!! TWO!! TH-Kick out!! “FOCUS!! FOCUS!!” Bruce screams at his partner as he got more than a little worried that he was about to lose the match. Johnny Jax doesn’t allow his opponent to get a breather as he grabs Cortez by the right arm before he’s even back up on his feet and drives him down with an Arm bar DDT. After nailing the DDT perfectly Jack floats over into a Fujiwara Arm bar, wrenching back on Todd’s right arm sending flashes of searing white pain down his elbow and shoulder. Bruce shifts his weight on the apron, uncomfortable with just watching the action in the ring but unable to affect it while Bloodshed seems to be watching everything but the two men fighting in the ring. Cortez fights against the pain, he tries to shift his body a bit to alleviate the pressure of the arm bar but Jax has it expertly applied and isn’t about to give his opponent any opening in the match. After a few more moments in the arm bar Bruce has had enough and rushes into the ring stomping Johnny Jax across the back of the head / neck with his cowboy boot, breaking the hold before the referee can intercept him. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! CABOOSE The Referee wasn’t on the ball there, he let Bruce break up the arm bar before he could stop him COACH That dirty, cheating bastard!! COLE Oh quit whining, he has a five count to get in and out of the ring. COACH That’s only when you tag out. After the blow to the head Jax thinks it best to tag out as he quickly reaches over and slaps hands with Scotty Static. But before he leaves the ring he picks Cortez up from the canvas and lifts him up for a double team move. Scotty Static quickly climbs the ropes and then comes off with a drop kick to the face of the Urban Legend. The impact knocks Cortez backwards, flipping over his own head and landing on his stomach right at Bruce’s feet almost within tagging range. COACH Too close!! Too close!! COLE Man he’s mere inches away from tagging out, inches from changing the momentum of the match instantly. Cortez raises his hand, reaching for the outstretched hand of Bloodshed who’s closest to him. Static lets Todd inch a bit closer before he grabs Cortez’ leg and pulls him towards the center of the ring, out of reach of a tag. COACH See, on the ball that’s what makes the OAOAST boys different, they use their brains, they’re smart COLE I hate to agree with you on ANYTHING Coach. . . COACH . . . but? COLE No that was it, I just hate to agree with you on anything. Static rushes his opponent, landing a clothesline that drops Cortez like a bad habit. Scotty Static then places Cortez’s head between his knees and pulls the Urban Legend upwards, most likely hoping to put him in a piledriver position, but Todd jumps with the move adding enough momentum to flip himself up onto Scotty’s shoulders. Cortez tries a hurracanrana but Static quickly puts his arms up to prevent it from happening and in the hopes of turning the move into a power bomb instead. Static staggers backwards a few steps as Cortez lands a few choice shots to the top of the Hooligan’s head and then he drops backwards sending Cortez face first into the top turnbuckle. COACH Oh yeah! That’s using your heard. . . or your opponent’s head in this case. Scotty quickly steps through the ropes and climbs up onto the top rope while he eyes Cortez on the ground and then prepares to leap off. But the drop is interrupted as Bloodshed grabs the top rope and shakes it so hard that Scotty Static looses his footing and slips off landing with one leg on either side of the turnbuckle. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW!! CABOOSE I doubt we’ll see a Static Jr. Now Scotty slowly falls forward, flopping to the ground in a heap after landing crown jewels first on the top turnbuckles. Cortez crawls across the canvas and covers Scotty Static taking advantage of Scotty’s unfortunate landing ONE!! TWO!! TH-NO!! COLE Oh come on O’Hara put Static’s foot on the rope COACH I didn’t see that, the referee didn’t see it either from the looks of it. Cortez seems in shock that Scotty Static wasn’t put away with that, but shakes it off as he tries to figure out something else to do to get this match to become a victory. He takes a few steps back, waiting for the still staggered Scotty to start getting up to his feet, then when he's at one knee Cortez charges in with an attempted Shining Wizard. The angle that Cortez and Static’s bodies are in comparison with the referee, prevents the zebra from seeing Static simply raise one of his arms up high, catching Todd Cortez right in a very sensitive area as he comes in for the shinning wizard. This, like Scotty Static’s slip up earlier in the match, causes the male portion of the audience to wince in pain and hold themselves. COLE What a cheap trick by Static! If the referee saw that his team would... COACH There you go again making up stuff that didn’t happen. COLE But I clearly saw it. COACH But that's the thing cracka!, the referee DIDN'T see it! And you know the old rule about what a referee sees and what he doesn't see CABOOSE Unfortunately, that rule is in full effect here tonight. Static has given his team a great advantage at the moment Neither man is very mobile at the moment so the rush to tag is really a “rush” per say but a slow crawl towards their respective corners. Static tags in his regular tag-team partner Johnny Jax who steps through the ropes and then rushes across the ring hoping to stop Todd Cortez from tagging out. COACH Oh he won’t make the . . . Cortez tags COLE You were saying? CABOOSE Oh shut up the both of you, Bloodshed and Johnny Jax are in the ring and no one wants to hear you two bicker. Bloodshed has been chomping at the bid to get into action and now that he’s finally tagged in he’s making the best of the situation starting with jabbing his fingers into Johnny Jax’s eyes to temporarily blind his opponent. Moments later Jax finds himself tossed over the side to the floor as Bloodshed grabs Jax by the trunks and the hair. With Jax laid out on the floor on the outside Bloodshed grabs the ropes and then slingshots himself over the top rope COLE WHOA beautiful slingshot plancha COACH Meh I’ve seen better Jamie O’Hara leaps into the ring, runs across the ring and then leaps over the top rope without touching it, knocking Bloodshed down COACH See? Much, much better CABOOSE Oh you shameless shill Not one to be outdone Todd Cortez enters the ring, bounces off the ropes and then knocks down Johnny Jax, Bloodshed and Jamie O’Hara with a suicide dive between the ropes. The last Hooligan hops over the ropes, runs across the ring and then leaps up on the top rope where he balances for a moment before leaping forward onto the 4 wrestlers on the floor HOLY SHIT!! HOLY SHIT!! HOLY SHIT!! HOLY SHIT!! COLE The wrestlers are flying high tonight! CABOOSE What’s that idiot doing? He can’t be serious. Bruce has stepped into the ring and actually runs towards the side where 5 others are COACH NO DAMN WAY IS HE JUMPING!! And Coach is right, at the last moment before he has to leap out of the ring Bruce stops with a grin on his face and then flips off the crowd for being so damn gullible. Bloodshed manages to grab Johnny Jax and roll him back into the ring and then follows him while the other three wrestlers on the floor are still recovering from their leaps out of the ring. With his opponent in the perfect position Bloodshed hooks both his arms under Johnny Jax’s and locks on a Full Nelson before turning it into a bridged Cattle Mutilation COLE It’s the Panic Attack! COACH Oh my boy Jax will power right out of that, don’t you worry Bloodshed’s muscle shake as he applies the pressure on his opponent, using all his skill and leverage to keep the Panic Attack locked on. COACH Any minute now Pete – you’ll see Jax’s face contorts in pain as Bloodshed pulls back on Johnny Jax’s spine trying to bend it in the opposite direction of what it was designed to do, rocking back and forth a little to lock the hold on tighter and tighter every time Jax tries to draw a breath of air. COACH Okay you can break it now Jax CABOOSE You sound a bit worried there Coach. The referee grabs Jax’s right arm and raises it into the air to see if he’s is out cold from the Panic Attack or not. The arm drops lifelessly to the canvas once, then another time, but Jamie O’Hara decides to enter the ring and kicks Bloodshed off Johnny Jax before the referee can lift his arm a third time. Jamie doesn’t stay in the ring for a more than a second after he kicked Bloodshed but instead quickly returns to the apron with the tag rope in hand yelling for Jax to tag one of them in. COACH See he’d break it, I knew it *sigh of relief* COLE O’Hara broke it! Not Jax COACH Ah semantics Bruce tagged in, Static isolated and mauled (big time cheating) With a swift flick of the legs Johnny takes Bruce down with a drop toehold that he rolls over into a side headlock on the big man. Jax makes sure the hold is on tight at Bruce starts to rise, lifting the 227 pound Cruiserweight high up in the air. The moment Bruce raises Jax into the air Scotty Static runs down the apron and quickly pushes his partner’s feet to give him enough momentum to turn the headlock into a tornado Bulldog on the King of Pain. A split second after the big man’s face has been driven into the canvas Johnny Jax leaps to his feet, runs at Bruce who’s barely up on his hands and knees and uses him as a step ladder by placing a foot on his back to help him up on the top rope. COLE Damn he’s fast, he’s so fast he’s sudden! CABOOSE Yeah but can he outrun a fart? I don’t think so COLE/COACH What?? Johnny Jax flips backwards off the top rope and lands an elbow right to Bruce’s lower back knocking the big man back down to the canvas. Jax quickly reaches out and tags Scotty Static before climbing up the ropes again as the referee begins the mandatory 5 count ONE!! Static climbs up the ropes in his corner to the top rope TWO!! The two men throw each other a thumbs up as they both balance on the top rope THREE!! Quickly leaping off Scotty Static lands a back Senton bomb while Johnny Jax lands a flying leg drop right across Bruce’s throat. FOUR!! Jax quickly rolls out under the bottom rope before the count reaches 5. The moment Jax is under the ropes Scotty Static covers Bruce by laying across his chest with all of his 198 pounds of weight. ONE!! TWO!! THR-BROKENUPBYTODDCORTEZ!! The kick to the back of the head on Scotty Static breaks the count and staggers him as well. Cortez eyes an opening and runs at Scotty Static, leaps and goes for the flipping Tombstone known as the Riot Act Plus SCOTTY STATIC FLIPS TODD CORTEZ OVER THE TOP ROPE!! COLE HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLY CRAP! COACH I couldn’t have said it better myself. The second Todd Cortez hits the ground both Jamie O’Hara and Johnny Jax leap on him and introduce him to their fists – repeatedly. Cortez isn’t alone for long as Bloodshed leaps off the apron and tackles Johnny Jax against the guardrail with a hollow thud. Moments later Bruce rolls under the bottom rope and lands a clubbing blow to the back of Jamie O’Hara driving the Birmingham Bad Boy off Todd Cortez. *CRACK!!* Scotty Static has grabbed the time keeper’s chair and cracked Bruce across the back with it as all 6 men brawl on the outside with no regard for the rules or for the referee’s instructions or pleads. *WHACK!!* Bloodshed repays the favor as he smacks Scotty Static square in the face with one of the OAOAST 6 Man titles, busting the young GPX’er wide open. * DING!*DING!*DING!*DING!*DING!*DING!* Even the ringing of the bell doesn’t stop the brawl on the floor as all 6 men forget about high flying action and let their fists do all the talking, at least until Michael Buffer makes the official announcement. MICHAEL BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen the referee has ruled this match a no conte-! Before Buffer can say “Contest” Bruce has pushed him to the ground and taken the microphone from the ring announcer. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! BLANK No, no, no, no! This isn’t how it ends tonight, NO *BEEP* WAY!! Maybe the sensitive OAOAST referees don’t like a bit of chair swinging but damn it this isn’t about headlocks or drop kicks! THIS IS ABOUT BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF YOU LOSERS!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! The Hooligans seem to take offence to Bruce’s comments as the big man keeps on talking. BLANK So how about this – You say the word and it’s back on, we defend these sum’bitches tonight YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!! BLANK Only WITHOUT DISQUALIFICATIONS OR COUNTOUTS!! COLE Bruce just suggested that they continue the 6 man tag-team title match as a no DQ, no Count out match CABOOSE Now we’re talking, get this settled like men! O’Hara, Jax and the bleeding Static huddle up for a moment and then O’Hara eagerly nods his head while Jax picks up the metal chair and Static grabs the ring bell off the table. CABOOSE IT’S ON NOW!! YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!! The moment the Hooligans agree to the match Todd Cortez tackles Johnny Jax and the fight is back on! Cortez Irish whips Jax hard into the guardrail, flipping the man from Detroit over the guardrail and into the crowd. The fans rises to their feet as Todd Cortez jumps over the guardrail as well and starts to attack Johnny Jax in the crowd – the fans likes their out of control, audience interactive brawls after all. YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! COACH Man this is almost impossible to keep track of COLE Tell me about it, I mean we’ve got THREE out of control brawls going on at the moment, this is not how it’s supposed to happen COACH What? Did you expect everyone to just go to the ring all courteous and shake hands?? These guys don’t like each other one little bit. Cortez taking a metal chair from a fan that’s more than willing to hand it to him and then bashes Johnny Jax over the back with him. Meanwhile at ringside Bloodshed and Scotty Static are both fighting over who gets to use the ring bell while Bruce introduces Jamie O’Hare to the ring post *THUD!!* Figuring that one good move shouldn’t go unrepeated Bruce whips Jamie O’Hare into the ringpost once more, busting the Birmingham Bad Boy wide open on the metal pole. Static manages to rip the ringbell out of Bloodshed’s hands and then strikes the demented Apostle with it. COACH That sick bastard is still smiling!! CABOOSE Don’t think that didn’t hurt – but he seems to like it when he’s hurting. Meanwhile the crowd parts like the Dead Seas as Todd Cortez keeps punching away at Johnny Jax, pushing him backwards and up the steps of the bleachers one punch at a time as the Urban Legend lets loose. After a exchanging blows and climbing the stairs Cortez & Jax have fought their way half way up the stairs exchanging lefts and rights along the way. Cortez tries to land an elbow on Johnny Jax but the quick Hooligan ducks under it, turns around and then nails Todd Cortez square on the jaw with a Superkick as the Urban Legend turns around... *POW!!* YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! The kick sends Cortez backwards, knocking him down the concrete stairs ass over elbow. Johnny Jax stands there for a moment and just watches as Todd rolls down the stairs, flipping over his shoulders once and then lands with one leg on each side of a metal pole. CABOOSE OOOOOOOOH right on the mommy/daddy button Bruce tries to Irish Whip Jamie O’Hare into the ring steps but he swiftly reverses it and sends Bruce face first into the metal steps knocking the top half of it off with his face. O’Hare slides into the ring and then runs at the ropes on the opposite side of where Bruce is to gain momentum for some sort of flying attack. COACH That damn Bloodshed!! And Coach is right to curse as Bloodshed leaps up at the last moment and pulls the top rope down, causing Jamie O’Hare to get tangled up in the ropes as he flips over the top. Johnny Jax has made it down the flight of stairs and dragged the very groggy Todd Cortez down the last few steps to the floor. Jax grabs Cortez around the head and then runs forward in a bulldog motion, but instead of driving his opponent down into the concrete he rams the top of Todd Cortez’s skull right into the metal exit door with a hollow thud! CABOOSE I knew this would be wild when it was announced, but this is totally out of control! COLE Yeah we’ve got two guys fighting their way to the lobby area and four guys at ringside tearing each other apart. Bloodshed is up on the apron landing blow after blow to the trapped Jamie O’Hara’s throat while Bruce staggers to his feet on the ground. The bloodied Scotty Static eyes an opening and grabs the ring bell off the floor. Then he runs at Bruce, bell raised high in the air. At the last moment Bruce ducks down, grabs Static around the waist and then lifts him up in the air while dropping backwards! COACH NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! *BONG!!* Static’s face strikes the steel steps without any protection as the crowd winces in horror over the sound and the sight of flesh on metal. Bruce rolls Scotty Static onto the floor and then covers his opponent and tells the referee in no uncertain terms that he BETTER count... ONE!! TWO!! THREE!! COACH NOOOOOOOOOO!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Neither Cortez nor Johnny Jax seems to have noticed that the Wildcards have successfully defended the 6 man tag-team titles as they keep exchanging lefts and rights by the arena exit. Bloodshed yells something to Bruce to get his attention. After noticing what’s going on in the ring Bruce pulls up the ring curtain, looking for something. Then he grins from ear to ear as he pulls out a staple gun! COACH Oh hells no! Get some officials out there, get the police or the national guard out here because this has GOT to stop!! CABOOSE Nah I wanna see where this is going Bruce climbs up on the apron next to where Jamie O’Hara is trapped and holds the staple gun up high in the air for the entire arena to see. Then Bloodshed pulls a playing card out from his pocket, a joker that’s smeared with blood. He places the card on O’Hara’s chest and Bruce squeezes off a staple! *WHACK!!* BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! COLE This is sick! These guys are animals!! COACH MAKE IT STOP!! MAKE IT STOP!! The crowd starts to pelt Bruce and Bloodshed with crumpled up cups and anything else they can think off as Bloodshed produces yet another playing card, the Ace of Spades with the name “Cortez” written across it. CABOOSE Well Cortez is obviously the “Ace” of the group COACH Oh very funny, they’re mutilating Jamie O’Hara and you’re making jokes?? *WHACK!!* The Ace is quickly stapled to O’Hare’s chest. Then Bruce pulls out a card of his own, the King of Spades, suitable for the King of Pain. Then he places it on O’Hare’s forehead before handing the staple gun over to Bloodshed... DON’T DO IT!! DON’T DO IT!! DON’T DO IT!! DON’T DO IT!! COACH DON’T DO IT!! DON’T DO IT!! *WHACK!!* COLE Right in the forehead! This is insane! After stapling the 3 cards to Jamie O’Hara, Bruce and Bloodshed jump down to the floor, round the corner to pick up the three tag-team titles and then they head up the aisle as the announcement is made. MICHAEL BUFFER The winners of the match and STILL OAOAST six man tag-team champion: Todd Cortez, Bruce Blank and Bloodshed – the WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILDCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!! COACH This isn’t over! This is far from over – mark my words The Hooligans will tear these three outsiders apart! COLE After what we saw tonight. . . I’m not so sure!