RavishingRickRudo

They could make him Calendar Man, and inform everyone of dates... but since he is JASON, he doesn't know the dates from November to July... so winter and spring really fuck him up.. ... I got nothin.

His first name is JASON? I really gotta pay attention...

I'd be up for writing Raw recaps... of course, I have night school until 9:30 and don't get home by at least 10:15 and miss half the show... but that doesn't matter... how long would they have to be in by???

Chapter 55: Invasion? What invasion? OH! You mean when ECW invaded Raw and how that was so revolutionary? No, you didn't mean that... what other invasion would there be? Ah yes, when WWE created wrestlers invaded WCW and formed the NWO... we remember that too... oh, you weren't talking about that either... well... we don't know of any invasion.... so lets move on to the next chapter. ...bastards...

It's amazing how in about an hour we came up with more ideas for two characters than the WWE writing team has in a year for the whole roster.... and they were actually better. Disturbing... truly, truly, truly disturbing... but still better.

With great power comes great responsibility, Czech... On the plus-side, we won't actually have to WATCH the show cause we'd just fuck around with the characters and gimmicks and put them in situations that never really happened anways...

Chapter 44: The XFL/WBF - Hey, we can suck at other things too!

Shit, now I am looking forward to these two suckfucks to get in the ring.

Chapter 42: Beating a dead horse.... how to make Survivor Series 1997 into Thanksgiving Turkey.

Nov 8 2003, 01:57 PM Lord of the Curry writes "Then, gradually, Cena learns the meaning of teamwork" Nov 8 2003, 03:01 PM The Czech Republic replies with ""And that's how John Cena discovered the true meaning of Christmas." --A Very Special SmackDown" Nov 8 2003, 03:09 PM RavishingRickRudo writes ".... IT BEGINS!!!"

You mean Fertig isn't pasty-white, lanky with messy blackhair and a poorly developed mustache... not to mention unusually large hands and ears?

So Fertig is TomCo's son AND brother? That's what inbreeding will do...

That's a perfect "in" for Nowinski as he is trying to hit up Molly.

Cena can take Fertig to the ghetto and have him hang with all the homeboys and then leave him there as a practical joke... when he returns he finds "Special K" has become accepted into the group and may cross the line by going on a trip to McAuthor Park at night. Tiny Lister guest-stars in a non Zeus role.

Yeah, we better stop and get this in classics before it gets ruined

How about an appreciation for French Art? Fertig: NO NO NO NO NO! That's THAT that's THAT that's NEO IMPRESSIONISM not NEO CLASSIC! Geez even I know tthhhaaaatt..

And Fertig sings pop, country and hip hop songs operatically??

Social Services will try to put Fertig in a "home" for people with "special needs", but Tomko wants to look after him because he knows that places like "those" are only bad for someone like Fertig. The mean case worker Mr. Moriarty and his prudish secretary Ms. Crabtree try every sleazy trick in the book and get Tomko on the ropes to where even his millions can't save him. Just when he thinks all hope is lost, THE MCMAHON's enter the fold with their BILLIONS and help him out.

Test and Steiner (decked out in matching high school jackets) pick on Fertig, and Stacy feels sorry for him and they become friends. She then falls in love with him which leads to the Fertig/Test match...

When Tomko is a heel, he tells Fertig about how their father used to beat their mother and them as kids, and Fertig starts to remember and gets really angry and Tomko channels that rage into eliminating the competition... *checks off list*

I tried to play-up Gump with Terri saying "Have you ever been with a girl before?"... but then I don't think Fertig takes Home Economics so I couldn't really go far with it...

So when does the "new retard" come into town named Hertig and takes the spotlight away from Fertig? And Fertig gets jealous and tries to eliminate Hertig... Vince McMahon: Ok now, break it up.

The final scene has Fertig looking down at a rubix cube (something he did when he was *smart*) and a tear rolls down his eye.

And when Fertig becomes smart again, he turns his back on all of his friends and mocks their stupidity... and when he slowly becomes dumb, they are still there for him.

*Austin gives Fertig a beer* *Fertig doesn't want any* *Austin looks at the crowd* *The crowd shakes their heads* *Austin looks down in disgust... then slowly raises his head with a sick grin on his face* JR: BAH GAWD STUNNER! HE STUNNERED A POOR DEFENSELESS RETARD! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! NEVER HAVE I SEEN ANYTHING THAT HORRIBLE AND DISGUSTING IN MY LIFE! ... But-that's-the-rattlesnake-god-blessum!