Bruce Blank

LOL for a second I thought you meant the Velociraptor - but he's a Cruiserweight too

Add to that the lack of Cruiserweight title for Mr. Blackwell as well and considering that part of Landon's story has been that he only needs the Hardcore & Cruiser title to get the "grand Slam" I stand by my statement. I guess you'll just be left hoping or guessing if I was joking or not then won't you?

Alright who's going to beat Ultimo Villano X this week? Step right up

Like it's always said?

To answer your question - yes they'll all be covered before Smarkdown goes up, I got 6 already written out. As for Mr. Blackwell PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF He never held the International title, some Grand Slammer he is *rolls eyes*

Man talk about stretching a foot to a mile - one new line?

LOL I thought "Widdle Warrior" clearly showed that I was less than serious

[Deep booming ”NFL Films” Voiceover] “March 30th 2005, Lockdown in Boise, Idaho” “A tournament had been arranged to merge the SWF United States Junior League and the SWF International Television Titles into a new belt, a belt that represents everything that the SWF stands for: Talented competitors and great action” “Only one show earlier Jay Hawke had unseated Austin Sly as the USJL champion and Johnny Dangerous had won the ITV title from Landon Maddix – now these two newly crowned champions would face off in the finals of this hard fought tournament.” #Flashback# “Welcome back to SWF Lockdown,” greets the voice of Longdogger Pete as the cameras making a sweeping pass of the Boise crowd, packed like sardines in the Idaho Center. They rise to their feet with cheers and hold up their signs. “138 Days of Crap” and “The Cockroach was crushed!” are among a few of the less offensive ones. “Finally,” Pete begins again as the cameras settle on the two announcers, “the time is upon us for the final match of the SWF Title Tournament. It’s been a rip-roaring ride so far; crowning two new Champions along the way and a few surprising twists in that, but tonight we put a close to this tournament. Tonight, Jay Hawke; the United States Champion, and Johnny Dangerous; the Intercontinental-Television Champion, will compete to unify the two titles and become the Champion of the newest SWF Title!” “This should make for a pleasantly good match,” adds King - his lack of spitefulness actually surprising his announcing partner. “It’ll be amazing to see Jay Hawke become the first Champion of this new title.” “How do you know Johnny Dangerous won’t win, King? I mean, he did the unthinkable and defeated Landon Maddix for the ICTV Title. I think the Barracuda is going to give up a much harder fight then what your expecting – so long as he can keep from getting frustrated and going nuts-o on Hawke.” “Bingo,” King smugly replies. “You said it right there, Drain-Clogger. Johnny can’t keep this little aggressive streak of his under control to win a match that has rules. He’ll get himself disqualified before he actually pins Hawke. On the other hand, Jay Hawke just got his first taste of gold in the SWF – he isn’t about to give it up so easily, and especially after only five days!” “Maybe so,” concedes Pete, “but I still have to pick the Barracuda to come out on top. He surprised even me by destroying Landon Maddix on Storm.” Suddenly, the familiar strains of Pink Floyd’s “Learning to Fly” kick up from the speakers while the lights slowly dim, heralding the entrance of Jay Hawke. The crowd, as expected, unloads with some boos! “Introducing first,” says Funyon, “from the Hall of Fame City of Cleveland, Ohio, weighing in at 215 pounds … he is the SMARTMARK WRESTLING FEDERATION UNITED STATES CHAMPIOOOOOOOOOON… ‘The Dean of Professional Wrestling’ JAAAAAAAAAAY HAWWWWWWWWWKE!” A spotlight shines on Jay Hawke as he emerges from the curtain. He stops at the top of the ramp and just looks out across the sea of fans before parting his black and purple robe to reveal the United States Championship secured to his waist. All around him he can here the fans striking up their familiar chant: “HAWKE SUCKS!” “HAWKE SUCKS!” “HAWKE SUCKS!” “HAWKE SUCKS!” “Hawke is obviously very proud of his newest accomplishment,” notes King. “He came to this federation with one goal – championships – and has done everything he can to make sure that he fulfills his goals. I’d say he’s doing a pretty fine job if you ask me.” “But we didn’t,” replies Pete, with a wide-toothed grin. His remark gets the Suicide King’s watchful eye, but before he can snap back at Pete Funyon begins again. “And his opponent,” he says as the lights dim down and a voice whispers a name in a deep, sultry voice… “JOHNNY DANGEROUS~!” …and the Idaho Center trembles with delight! “After the Flesh” kicks up from the speakers, getting a solid cheer from the fans and even more so when the Barracuda himself steps out from behind the curtains. Fans crowd the aisles leading to the ring, hoping to grab a good snapshot or a high five from the Secret Agent, but he simply passes by them and slides into the ring – his focus is totally on the task at hand. “From Las Vegas, Nevada and weighing in at two hundred-seventeen pounds! He is one half of the SWF WOOOOOOOORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS AND THE REIGNING SWF INTERCONTINENTAL-TELEVISION CHAMPIOOOOOOOON… JOHNNY ‘THE BAAARRAAACUDAAA’ DAAAANGEROUUS!!” Johnny slides into the ring, heads for the turnbuckles and climbs up, igniting a wave of flash photography as he raises both title belts out to the fans. After a few seconds of mugging for the crowd, Johnny’s head snaps over and he glares at Jay Hawke rather menacing before climbing down from the post and handing the titles over to the referee. “Ever since Johnny didn’t win the Clusterfuck we’ve seen quite a different side to the Barracuda,” notes Pete. “He’s been highly unpredictable and overly aggressive – seemingly willing to do whatever it takes to make his way back to the top of this federation.” “Yeah, but his involvement in this tournament is more destructive than helpful in his bid to get a title match against our World Champion,” King says. “If that’s what he really wants he should just walk away now and let Hawke have this new title.” “I bet you’d like that too,” replies Pete. “Anything to keep this highly disputed undefeated streak of Jay Hawke’s intact.” “He is undefeated, Toilet-Clogger!” snaps King, “in singles matches that is. His only two losses have come against Wild and Dangerous in tag team matches.” “And one-half of Wild and Dangerous is in the ring now,” Pete reminds his announcing partner. In the ring, referee Ronald ‘Red’ Herrington takes both title belts and holds them high into the air, displaying them to every side of the crowd. The gold glistens off the lights and the fans cheer enormously. They know that tonight the storied histories of two separate titles in the SWF is about to come to a close, so the final displaying of these belts is a heartfelt one. After a few moments, Herrington hands the two belts off to a ringside assistant, for probably the last time. “Indeed the time to put these two titles to rest has come,” says Pete, “but with the retirement of these two belts we kick off the newest SWF Title which has yet to be named – those honors go to the winner of this match.” “If Johnny wins I could only imagine what kind of self-glorifying title name he comes up with,” grumbles King. “The Barracuda Title?” In the ring and with the cheesiest, shit-eating grin imaginable, Johnny extends his hand to Jay Hawke, “-and will you just look at that,” says Pete. “Even in this kind of a match, with all that is at stake here, the Barracuda is willing to show a little good sportsmanship!” “My a(Beep!)S he is!” snaps King. “Just look at that demonic smile. If you think Johnny Dangerous is here to be a good sportsman than you obviously haven’t been paying attention lately!” The feeling is mutual for the Dean of Professional Wrestling. He looks at Johnny’s extended hand almost in amazement! If the Barracuda thought that Hawke was about to engage in a civil match he was seriously in for a rude awakening, and with the way Dangerous is looking at Hawke he’s lucky he doesn’t get his teeth kicked down his throat! Jay immediately slaps Johnny’s hand away from him then quickly lunges at his opponent with a ferocious growl, catching Dangerous in the side of his face with an elbow! CRACK! DING DING DING!!! “This match is on!” exclaims Pete as Johnny’s head snaps back from the blow, and the crowd goes wild with the bell signifying the start of this anticipated bout! Hawke advances on the Barracuda, slamming two more elbows into the side of his face before grabbing his arm to send him barreling across the ring with an Irish whip! As Johnny goes towards the ropes Hawke stoops down, anticipating Dangerous’ return, but the return never comes – Johnny quickly grabbing onto the ropes to keep himself away from harms reach. However, if he won’t come towards harm it’ll just have to go to him. Hawk suddenly bolts towards Johnny, but the Barracuda isn’t going to just stand there and watch as his opponent races in towards him – Johnny comes off the ropes and levels Hawke with a short clothesline! WHAM! The blow catches the US Champion by total surprise, knocking him flat on his back, but he quickly jumps back up to his feet… WHAM! …Only to get knocked back down once more with another clothesline! The fans howl in excitement at the Barracuda’s growing momentum, but the two clotheslines only start to enrage the US Champion. “This match is starting off with a tremendous bang!” exclaims Pete. “Both of these competitors are giving the other man everything he’s got!” “They’d better slow down if they want to come out of this with the victory,” warns King. “They’re going to end up wearing themselves out in the first five minutes!” Once more Hawke pops back up to his feet, this time quickly jumping to the defensive. Johnny is stopped across the ring, grinning at his opponent, and then he steps forward – moving to encircle Jay as some chants for the Secret Agent break out: “JOOOOOOHN-E!” “JOOOOOOHN-E!” “JOOOOOOHN-E!” The chants of the Idaho crowd get a grinning nod from Johnny. It’s almost as if he were trying to rile up his opponent by showing him who’s side the fans were on, but the notion is taken in no regards from Hawke. He doesn’t care what these tractor driving, potato growing fools with dirty fingernails think – he never has before and he isn’t about to start now! Finally, the two men come together and clash with a collar-elbow-tie up, fighting for purchase! It’s a bait and switch though, as Johnny has no desire to try and out-muscle Jay Hawke and quickly breaks the tie up while grabbing his opponent’s arm and spinning around behind him for a hammerlock! The Barracuda cranks back on the arm, but Hawke isn’t about to start handing over body parts this early on without a fight! He suddenly spins around, ripping his arm free of Johnny’s grasp and nailing the Secret Agent in the jaw with an elbow! CRACK! Johnny stumbles back with a hand to his jaw, feeling his lip for blood as he angrily glares at his opponent. The feeling is mutual, and Jay stares back just as well--rather intensely as he knows he finally got one in over Dangerous --while taking the half second he has to work the kink out of his shoulder. The heated moment sends a buzz through the Boise crowd, and they move to the edge of their seats. Chants erupt from all corners of the arena as the two competitors snarl at each other and bare down on their knuckles, seemingly growing more irate by the minute! “Will you just listen to these fans,” marvels Pete. “I never imagined this title tournament would get these fans so excited!” “Figures,” hisses King, shaking his head in annoyance. “These people are so bored with their lives – picking potatoes all day long – all we have to do is have someone nail a clothesline and these people are having an orgasm.” Suddenly, Johnny rockets towards the US Champion and fakes with a left then quickly slings a right into Hawke’s mouth! WHAM! “RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!” The fans explode into cheers, thrilled that this match just might be filled with more ruthlessness than originally expected. However, the blow doesn’t even seem to faze the US Champion, and he fires back with a forearm into the side of Dangerous’ skull! WHACK! Johnny immediately stumbles back, unable to take the blows without flinching like his opponent, and if Jay has it his way… the Barracuda will be doing a lot more than flinching in the next few minutes! He quickly closes in with a second forearm…then a third, each hit knocking Dangerous a step closer to the ropes! Though dazed, Johnny frantically reaches back to feel for the ropes and to have something to grab onto, but before he can reach them Hawke grabs him by the arm and whips him across the ring! Johnny hits the ropes and bounces back towards the US Champion, who begins the motions of a lariat, but before he can connect Johnny ducks down and blazes right under the ‘Dean’s’ arm! He races right past Hawke, heading straight for the ropes behind his opponent and picking up some serious steam! He hits the ropes and springs off them to go screaming back towards the US Champion, then jumps up… WHAM! …and slams into the ‘Dean of Professional Wrestling’ with a flying body press! He catches Jay just as he was spinning back around to face him, and hits so hard that he violently sends Hawke crashing down into the canvas! Johnny stays right on top of his opponent, hoping for a quick pin as Herrington drops to count for… ONE!! NOOO!!! Hawke, using everything he’s got, shoves the Barracuda off of him, ending the count just before two! “I think you can toss that friendly match idea out the window now, Comet,” snickers King, as Pete furrows his brow. “These two look more like two gorillas fighting for leadership of the band! Only this fight is to get back that new title… so umm…I guess they wouldn’t really be fighting for leadership or anything, but still…you know what I mean…it’s not friendly!” “Well if there’s one thing you should learn from tonight, that’s to quit while you’re ahead,” says Pete, scolding his broadcast partner. “As far as these two go, they might be taking out more of their aggression then what I had originally hoped for—both of them!” Hawke tries to quickly get to his feet and get back on the defensive path, but his nimble opponent greets him with a boot to the gut! Jay doubles over and Johnny snags him in a side headlock. He clenches down as hard as he can then starts to pull the US Champion across the ring, fully intending to clothesline him across the top rope. However, Jay isn’t about to let any of those shenanigans play out though and he quickly slams on the brakes, shoving Dangerous away. Johnny keeps on going, heads across the ring once more then hits the ropes and comes rocketing back towards Hawke. Like before, the Dean looks to catch the Barracuda with a lariat only this time… WHACK! “RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!” …it connects, and he sends Johnny to the mat with a thunderous clothesline! Now it’s Jay’s turn to make for the cover, and he does so with Herrington counting for… ONE!! TW-NOOO!!!! Johnny kicks out just in the middle of two! Hawke grabs the Barracuda by his head and pulls him to his feet, tossing in a few shots to Johnny’s midsection to keep him subdued before spinning him around and locking his hands around the Barracuda’s waist from behind! Dangerous knows what’s coming up next and it’s all he can do to frantically grapevine his leg around Hawke’s as the Dean tries to haul him over for a German. It stops the suplex as intended, giving Johnny enough time to send an elbow flying back into his opponent’s skull! Jay grunts from the blow, but doesn’t budge until three more elbows thrown in rapid succession coming firing back at him! Finally, the strikes pay off and Hawke staggers back off the Secret Agent, releasing his hands from Johnny’s waist. But it seems to only enrage the ‘Dean of Professional Wrestling’ even more, and he charges right back in, just when Dangerous thought he had a second to breathe… WHAM! …and clubs him right in the spine with a closed fist! Johnny arches back, crying out in pain as the crowd “OOOOOH”S!” from the hollow, bone filled THUNK~! that pierces the sound waves! “OH!” Pete winces at the hit. “Jay Hawke is pulling out all the stops to try and put the Barracuda away. I don’t think he realizes what he’s dealing with—who he’s in the ring with—cause we’ve all seen what happens when the Barracuda unleashes all his frustrations in the ring!” “He knows damn well who’s in that ring with him,” snaps King, “and he isn’t about to let that goofball upstage him in a match!” Hawke quickly seizes his opponent once more from behind then hauls him up, and over, and into the canvas, neck-and-shoulders first with a German suplex! WHAM! Then immediately floats over for the cover. ONEE!! TWOOO!!!! NOOOOO!!!!!! Johnny thrusts his shoulder of the mat just after two, saving himself from a loss for the time being. “Jay Hawke goes for the suplex once more, only this time he gets it and earns a two count,” says Pete. “Thus bringing his power package to the table; only tonight he’s not just bringing it, he’s heaving it onto the table! If Agent Dangerous has any realistic plans of winning this match he’s going to have to keep the distance and move the match with quick strikes.” Hawke moves to reacquire the shaken Barracuda before he can get to a vertical position on his own; grabbing Johnny by his head and jerking him to his feet. Jay quickly pulls Johnny into a headlock to keep the pressure on his opponent and gradually wear him down until Dangerous has nothing left to offer. That time has yet to come though, and before the US Champion has the chance to tighten his grip and crush the Secret Agent like a trash compactor, Johnny jams his elbow into Hawke’s gut! the Dean grunts on impact and Johnny fires another shot in, this time with a little more force behind it. The elbows themselves don’t really do much damag, but they certainly distract him from his goal, and eventually allowing the Barracuda to slip out of harms reach. Johnny quickly darts across the ring, hits the ropes and comes rocketing back towards the Dean, just as Hawke suddenly spins back around with a forearm leading the way! WHOOSH! Johnny dodges the forearm smash by ducking down and spinning away from the oncoming arm then fluidly moves right into a roundhouse kick! He nails the US Champion right in his abdomen, stunning Hawke as he doubles over while clenching his wound. Johnny takes the one second opening that his opponent gives him and moves right into a Russian Leg Sweep! Hawke goes crashing into the mat after having his legs swept out from under him, and Johnny quickly jumps up then arches back while bringing out his elbow… WHACK! …and sinks the point of his elbow directly into Jay Hawke’s sternum! The ‘Dean of Professional Wrestling’ quivers on impact, but stays on his back as Johnny floats over for a cover. ONEE!!! TWOOO!!!!!! KICKOUT!!!!!!!!! “Again, Hawke slips out of the pin attempt,” says King, as the US Champion thrusts his shoulders off the mat then rolls onto his stomach and pushes up off the mat, “proving that it’s going to take a lot more than anything Johnny has to offer to put him down!” “I wouldn’t be so sure, Brian,” Longdogger firmly replies. “I think Johnny is starting to realize that he needs to let his instincts in the martial arts guide him in this match. If anything it’s definitely allowed him to take control of this match.” “Yeah, but how long is that going to last?” ponders King as Hawke gets to his knees only to find the Barracuda charging back towards him! Johnny dives at his opponent feet-first, but the US Champion quickly rolls out of the way… “Oof!” …and Johnny lands flat on his back in the most unflattering of mannerisms. He flushes bright red and quickly pops back up to his feet… WHACK! Only for Jay Hawke to charge in with a forearm smash that sends the Barracuda rocking on his heels! Johnny staggers back against the ropes, semi-stunned, but still coherent enough to quickly duck down as Jay rushes forward with a second forearm smash. Johnny pops up from behind then braces himself to deliver a Johnny Kick! The crowd moves to the edge of their seats, and as the Dean turns back around to face his opponent, Johnny launches his foot into the air--his targeting reticules locked onto Hawke’s chin! “NOBODY HOME!” exclaims King as Hawke frantically leans back to avoid the blast and grabs the Barracuda by his ankle, snatching it straight out of mid-air! Johnny gasps in horror, but before he can readjust his plan the Dean flips him to the mat, flat on his face, “-and here comes the Wing Span!” cries Pete. “Jay Hawke has got Johnny down, and if he can lock that devastating submission in this could spell disaster for Agent Dangerous!” “And victory for Jay Hawke,” adds King. “Well, yes,” replies Pete, shaking his head in despair, “that is how it generally goes. I’m so glad you could lend your wisdom to tonight’s broadcast.” “Go to hell, Drain-Clogger!” snaps King as Hawke desperately tries to scissor his legs around Johnny’s arm and lock in his deadly Wing Span, but Johnny frantically kicks and bucks, trying to worm his way free! Finally, he reaches for the ropes, as it’s all he can do to break free and snares onto the bottom. Herrington calls for the break, which gets a half big reaction from the fans! However, Hawke is less than willing to oblige. He keeps on trying to lock in the submission even with the referee ordering a break, hammering his fist into Johnny’s shoulder blades, forcing the referee to start a count… “ONE!” “TWO!” “THREE!” “FOUR!” Finally, Hawke obliges and releases Dangerous, who lets out a sigh of relief, but it isn’t going to last long as the US Champion quickly pulls him back up with an arm wrench. He steps forward, whipping the Barracuda across the ring and straight towards the corner… WHACK! “OOOOOOOOH!!” Johnny slams back-first into the unforgiving steel post then flops to the canvas! He groans in agony, clutching his aching back while trying to get back up. Staying on the mat would certainly be his doom and he knows it, so despite the pain he reaches for the ropes and pulls himself back to his feet. However, that seems to be just what the US Champion was hoping for. He charges across the ring towards his opponent, catching Johnny like a deer caught in the headlights before spinning around and absolutely blasting him in the face with a roundhouse kick! KA-RAAAACK!! Hawke’s devastating blow sends the Barracuda tumbling over the top rope to the thinly-padded concrete floor, and he lands with a monstrous thud! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” “What a tremendous hit that was!” exclaims Pete, shouting over the booing crowd. “I think Agent Dangerous might be counting his blessings that it sent him over the top rope and not to the mat, or it’d have certainly been the end of this match!” “It might as well be,” says King. “Seeing as how Jay Hawke has basically controlled ever second of this match it’s not very likely that Johnny can win, anyway, he might as well give up now!” Herrington begins the standard ten-count on Johnny, who is on the outside holding dearly to his head. He gets up on his knees, but doesn’t move from that position. “ONEEE!!!” “TWOOO!!!” “THREEEE!!!” “FOOOOOUR!!!” Hawke knows he could probably win this match right now as the Barracuda doesn’t look to be climbing back inside the ring anytime soon, but he decides not to tempt fate. So like any sensible warrior would, the Dean drops out of the ring and grabs Johnny by his collar, pulling the stunned Secret Agent to his feet then heaves him in the ring under the bottom rope with everything he’s got! hawke rolls in after his opponent just as the referee reaches the count of “SIIIIIIIIX” then rolls Johnny onto his back and goes for the pin. Herrington stops his count out and drops for the pin-fall. ONEEE!!! TWOOOO!!!!!! THRE-NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Johnny kicks out with only a nanosecond to spare, and the crowd roars its approval with a thunderous cheer! “Johnny gets the shoulder up again,” says Pete, “but there wasn’t much authority behind that one. Luckily, he had all that time to recover or he might have bit the dust right there!” “Unluckily for us though,” chirps King. “We could have been done with this match already. To think that we could’ve already crowned the new champion!” Hawke grabs Johnny by his head and begins pulling him to his feet. It’s obvious that the US Champion has grown tired of the Barracuda’s persistence. He’s dominated the Secret Agent for most of the match, proving to Dangerous and the World that he is truly superior. He grabs Johnny by his throat and pulls him to his feet, only to a thumb to his eyes! “What the hell was that!?” cries King, “Johnny just raked the Dean of Professional Wrestling’s eyes!” Hawke staggers back, both hands covering his eyes as Johnny steps forward and slams his open fist into the US Champion, right between the eyes, with a vicious, yet desperate Shotei Palmstrike! THHHHH-WAAAACK! “RAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!” The crowd explodes as Johnny thunders the strike into Hawke’s skull and sends the Dean stumbling back, “-and Agent Dangerous still has some fight left inside him!” exclaims Pete. “He’s not going down to Jay Hawke just yet, so long as he has something left in the tank!” Dangerous steps forward, utterly seething and determined that win or loose, he won’t be the only one going home with a headache tonight! He storms after the US Champion and launches his fist into Hawke with a second Shotei, and then a third before finally spinning completely around… WHOOSH-CRACK!! …and just cranking his foot into Hawke’s temple with a spinning heel kick, nearly fracturing his skull! The Dean of Professional Wrestling goes flying backwards and he falls into the ropes, completely stunned out of his mind! Johnny quickly reacts, knowing good and well that it won’t take long for his opponent to gather himself. He pulls Jay off the ropes and ducks down to drape his opponent across his shoulders then carefully, with a tremendous growl, stands to his feet! “What a tremendous display of strength by the Barracuda,” marvels Pete as the fans valiantly cheer the Secret Agent on. Johnny doesn’t take any time to acknowledge them though, knowing that he can’t hold his opponent up for long as his back is already starting to give away. He quickly executes a forward flip, bringing his opponent down into the canvas and drilling him back-first! WHAM! “RAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!” “Spinal Explosion!” calls Pete, as the ring quivers on impact. “Agent Dangerous is showing that he can come up with some powerful moves as well as his opponent!” “Maybe so,” adds King, “But do you really think that’s going to be enough to end this match!?” Hoping to answer that very question, Johnny reaches back and hooks onto Hawke’s leg then rolls him onto his shoulders. Herrington drops to count for… ONEE!!! TWOOOO!!!!!! THR-NOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Jay kicks out just before three, and the fans roar in excitement! He pushes off the mat with one hand while holding his head with the other hand, grimacing from the head trauma. “All those shots Agent Dangerous has delivered to The Dean’s head seem to be finally sinking in,” observes Pete. As Hawke finally stands the Barracuda is already waiting on him, and Johnny punts his foot right into the Dean’s gut! Jay doubles over into a side headlock, just like earlier, only this time he isn’t able to put up any resistance as Dangerous bolts across the ring, pulling him along for the ride. Johnny doesn’t even bother to slow down as he nears the edge of the ring, instead he hurdles over the top rope and clotheslines the US Champion against the ropes as he drops to the outside! Hawke goes flying back and crashes down back-first into the mat with a tremendous thud! He thrashes back and forth while clenching his neck, and to Johnny he’d appear to be the perfect sitting duck. The Secret Agent hops up to the outside apron then vaults to the top rope and springs off! He extends his elbow way out, but before he reaches his opponent, Hawke draws his knees up and Johnny slams chest-first into them! “OOOOOOOOH!” Johnny glances off the knees and is sent spinning through the air before crashing down into the mat himself, leaving both men on the mat to wallow in their own pains! “Dear God!” shouts Longdogger Pete. “Just like that, Jay Hawke puts a block into Agent Dangerous’ game plan!” Johnny sits on his knees, cradling his chest as Hawke staggers to his feet, woozy from the skull shots. The Dean moves forward while holding the side of his head, just as the Barracuda starts climbing back up to his feet, but before he can get all the way up Hawke shoots at the Barracuda’s foot! He grabs Johnny’s foot, but the split second reflexes of the Secret Agent cause him to leap up… CRACK! …and just barely grazes the back of the Dean’s skull with an enzuigiri! Hawke drops to his knees, too stubborn to actually fall flat on his face, which is no problem for Dangerous—he’ll make the US Champion go down like it or not! Johnny quickly reaches around Hawke’s neck from behind, and locks on a sleeper! Dangerous tightens down as hard as he can, determined to subdue this beast, who is flailing his arms and trying to pull Johnny’s arms away from his neck! “The Barracuda is going for the technical knockout it seems,” suggest Pete. “With all the blows Johnny has dealt to Hawke’s head, this could very well be the ticket!” “What are you blabbering about? Johnny doesn’t contain the strength in those toothpick arms to put a poodle out, much less the Dean of Professional Wrestling himself,” King says, even as Hawke seems to be slowly fading. However, Jay Hawke is determined to go home as the new Champion. He isn’t about to let the Barracuda put him out and so Hawke begins to stand while jamming elbow and elbow back into Johnny’s side, “-and the Dean is fighting back!” exclaims King. “He isn’t about to give up this match after dominating Johnny for so long. He’s got way too much energy invested in this match to let it all slip away so easily!” “Perhaps that was the Barracuda’s plan,” Pete speculates. “Maybe Johnny wanted Hake to wear himself out and not be able to fight back when it really mattered.” “But he IS fighting back,” adds King. Indeed the Dean is fighting back, and his elbows finally knock Johnny off of him, but not without a tremendous amount of effort. Jay rushes forward, wanting to get as much distance between him and dangerous as possible, and heads for the ropes. He hits them and comes sailing back towards Johnny, but like several times before Johnny is more than ready for the Dean’s return and he jumps up… CRACK! “And LEVELS the US Champion with a springing side kick!’ shouts Pete as Johnny’s foot sails into the Dean’s jaw, knocking him flat on his back! Jay moves quickly though, desperately trying to claw his way back up to his feet even in his stunned state. Behind him, Johnny eagerly awaits with the fans rising to their feet in anticipation, cheering whole-heartedly, and as Hawke staggers to his feet… “Here it comes,” says Pete, and Johnny swoops in on Hawke and puts his devastating fall away slam into motion. “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEM-IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-” -SLAM!!! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!! “MI SLAM! MI SLAM!” The fans howl in excitement at seeing the Barracuda’s deadly move executed to finish as Hawke is pounded into the canvas! Johnny isn’t about to waste any more time however and quickly floats over for the cover as Herrington drops to count for: ONE!!! TWO!!!!!! THRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! DING DING DING!!! ‘After the Flesh’ kicks up in the arena once more, this time in celebration of the Barracuda’s victory, alongside the fans roar of cheers. “Your winner of this match,” bellows Funyon, “and winner of the SMARTMARK WRESTLING FEDERATION TITLE TOURNAMENT… JOOOHNNY ‘THE BAAAARRAAAACUDAAAA’ DAAAANGEROUUUS!!!” Herrington hands the Tag Team Championship back to Dangerous, and then grabs Johnny’s arm and raises it high into the air in victory as Funyon’s announcement comes over the speakers. “Johnny Dangerous has won the SWF Title Tournament,” says Pete. “However, we’ll have to give him some time to decide what he’s going to call this new title as the belt will be unveiled on Smarkdown.” “Smarkdown?” questions King, “gee-whiz! You mean to tell me I have to wait four days to figure out what crappy name Johnny is going to bestow on this new title belt?” “What you expected us to have a title already engraved with whatever name Johnny hasn’t even picked out for it yet?” “Alright,” King concedes. “You have a point.” Johnny takes his one title and heads out of the ring, knowing that on Smarkdown he will be presented with the new SWF Title and have one more Championship under his belt… “5 days later Johnny Dangerous named the title the SWF International Title and it has since then become one of the most sought after, hotly contended often defended titles in all of wrestling” The final shot is a still of Johnny Dangerous with the International title strapped around his waist with the caption. First ever SWF International Champion: Johnny Dangerous Smarkdown – July 24th – Who will follow in Johnny Dangerous footsteps as the NEXT SWF International Champion??

Well before they signed Hogan it made sense - I'm just glad they didn't go with that. I forget what Slaughter even did after Hulkamania took off, he wasn't at a WM or anything - where did he go? what did he do?

While the rest of us wish it would go away now

KA-CHING!!! and I like the idea, we could have small teams (maybe 4 guys) that we're supposed to pick for a storm/lockdown/smarmdown rotation - that way we can't just pick the guys we're facing and write a match to rack up points, and we should pick before the Storm card is even posted to futher prevent tampering. It'll be a fun little side game to play.

Erm time to show my ignorance here, who is running the international tag-team tornament and would that person perhaps be interested in me pitching in next week to write the Denmark / Jamaica match? I've only done a Danish character once in all my e-fedding time, it'd be fun to try to make it work.

See then how do you know if Akira or Zyon promoed back or not? laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazy! And erm Zyon had a promo on Lockdown. . . didn't read that either? all I can say is "tisk,tisk widdle warrior"

You mean like Bruce responded last show to your previous promo? like that?

You know I can see some milage in the longest and the second longest reigning SWF champion facing off

Well, I guess you can call me a thug, then... because if I was in Owen's shoes, and I had the chance to do so, you can bet your ass that *I* would have taken liberties with him. I guess that's just shows the differene between people - you'd beat up someone for tricking your brother to lose a title that's decided by a booker anyways and not actually a legitimate sports title and then make fun of his while he went off to a HUGE Turner payday. To each his own I suppose.

reasonable to get revenge? as in PHYSICALLY hurt him? nah that's where the "reasonable road" ends because that's not a reasonable way to react to something unless you're in grade school or you're some thug or you have the mentality of a grade school thug . . . so I can see why Shawn may actually have thought that upon reflection.

LOL it's also a sign of how inflated Shawn's ego is - "Oh he's a friend of Bret his first and foremost thought is to hurt me because I am da Heelz LOLZ!" Maybe it's because Shawn despised Bret and by proxy his entire family and would rather not have Owen elevated? More so than the injury posibility.

MAIN EVENT: INTERNATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP ELIMINATION FOUR-WAY "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins vs. "The Divine Wind" Akira Kaibatsu vs. "Iron" Mike Cross vs. Bruce Blank - I'm not predicting my own match but whomever wins it will have to crank out something top class. -=-=-=-=- TAG TEAM TERROR Kerry Staunton and Scott Rageheart vs. The Axis (Trent Hawk and Ciro Vitale) - It's the battle of who'll show, will Staunton & Rageheart show us something? will the Axis? I'll say that the Axis actually DOES show and does win. -=-=-=-=- SINGLES MATCH OF APPARENT IMPORT Grendel vs. Mike Van Siclen Special Guest Commentators: Tom Flesher and Grendel's Mask On A Styrofoam Head It won't matter because people will be more focused on the commentators. -=-=-=-=- SPECIAL ATTRACTION An Octopus vs. A Velociraptor Talk about a tough one, the only truely undefeated SWF mainstay and the guy that only lost to a guy 10 times his weight (T-Rex in case you're wondering) Octopus wins it for the home team

Yes we need a European tour! - I've read last years European tour and you even went to Denmark, so a 10 stop European tour would be cool - althought I guess to some Bulgaria may be harder to write than the MST3K show since MST3K is probably more well known to Americans I want to see a show from way up north when it's freezing f'ing col Ice Storm!!

Only two (maybe just one if the PPV isn't part of the fictional tour) more stop where it can happen, you'll just have to stick around for those two and see And with Austin Sly leaving. . . dare I wish for it? *crosses fingers and hopes* ohpleaseohpleaseohpleasecomebackcrimsonskull!!

Ah damn we're being upstaged by the opening match Short but sweet this week

I am so sowwy about that I'll try to get a rush job in next week or something And I actually beat Zyon competitively and not by no show? damn cause he's one of the guys here who's writing I'm really digging so this is huge to me. And here we are a show on time *thumbs up* I know it’s hard running the ship more or less by yourself Chris, you deserve a lot of credit (end gratuitous suck up) So we’re still missing Flesher/WC – it’ll be worth the wait for sure so that’s cool but hey we still had three long, top notch edge of their seats matches Oh and a couple of short’uns I suppose. Main Event: Good stuff, good stuff I must say and a hell of a win for ya too – I really look forward to next week!

1) Depends on the outcomes of Lockdown and Smarkdown, we shall see what happens when they happen 2) Sadly the fictional world tour is going over like a fart in church, cause I liked it and I have fun with it but milage varies. I like the tour idea with each tour ending in a PPV at the culmination of the tour. I'd love to see a "Time Travel Tour" just for the hell of it - this is fantasy, this is imaginary so why not use it? I mean an SWF event in the Coliseum with Julius Caesar himself watching? fun stuff All made possible with our Frost Brand Time Machine (there is nothing they can't invent) *thumbs up* But well with the response to the fictional tour this probably won't happen - and shouldn't be the next tour since that's the "Road to Genesis" and all

LOL@Team Cracker