Guess Who's Coming To Dinner, Part 2

[Guest Ace309]

Tom Flesher sits in his Buffalo apartment, dressed much as he would be for a match - cargos, a t-shirt and Doc Martens, the US Title folded and put in a place of honor on his coffee table. He picks up a few magazines and moves them around, making sure the apartment is absolutely spotless for his guest. On his desk, he has a bottle of Jose Cuervo tequila and two twelve-packs of Corono, flanked by a salt shaker and a bowl of limes. "Can never have too much alcohol," we hear him mutter as he straightens up further. He looks up at the clock, which reads 8:26.

 

DING DONG!

 

Flesher looks up, obviously nervous, and sprints to the door. Standing on the other side is El Luchadore Magnifico, wearing street clothes. Flesher raises his eyebrow, and asks, "Where's the Light Heavyweight belt?"

 

Magnifico chuckles to himself and says, "You think I'm gonna wear it out in Buffalo on my way to the place where someone who hates me is waiting with lots of glass bottles?"

 

Flesher shrugs. "I wear my belts out all the time."

 

"Why? You want all the kids running up to you to get their pictures taken with you?" Magnifico snorts.

 

"Nah, none of that shit. It gets me laid."

 

Magnifico pauses and shifts uncomfortably. Flesher clears his throat, then says, "C'mon, have a seat." He leads the Luchadore over to a futon propped up on cinderblocks, under which are several trunks full of wrestling equipment. "What do you want to start with?"

 

"You know, beer before liquor, never been sicker. Bring the Cuervo."

 

Flesher sets two shot glasses, the salt shaker and a pair of lime wedges in front of Magnifico, then fills each shot glass and offers the shaker to his guest. The each lick the salt, take the shot and bite their lime, with Magnifico no-selling the liquor grimace entirely and Flesher coming up grinning. With that, he cracks open a Corona, drops in the lime and takes a healthy swig.

 

"Just how long you expect me to hang around here, esse?" Magnifico shifts around on the futon, looking suspiciously at Flesher. "I mean, doing the lucha hung over is some shit."

 

Flesher cracks open a beer for Magnifico and hands it across the table. Mags takes a quick sip, then sets it down. "I'm just trying to reach out to you, man. The Clan and the Carnival are coming togther... we haven't been getting along, but we need to smooth it out if we want this alliance to work. I mean, shit, man, we'd wreck the tag division."

 

"Yeah, not with my boys Edwin and Chris on top of the hill, we wouldn't." Magnifico stares icily at Flesher. "So seriously, chico... how long you gonna make me stay?"

 

Tom looks a little disappointed, and sighs. "Okay... it's obvious you're not feeling it. Just do one more shot with me and finish your beer, okay?"

 

"Sure, whatever, man."

 

Flesher pours out two more shots and slices out two more lime wedges. He looks up at the clock, and sees that it reads 8:47. He sighs to himself, realizing it's not going as well as he'd planned. Making one more grasp at conversation, he says, "So what's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you?"

 

Almost immediately, Magnifico's eyes light up. "Well, you know...."

 

Flesher interrupts him.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

Magnifico starts talking again. "There was this one time we were in the Love Rollercoaster, on our way to Tijuana, and Stevens said he was going to buy the food...."

 

Magnifico tells the whole sordid story, all the while with Flesher nodding and smiling, extremely happy that he's finally starting to get along with his adversary, as the clock reads 9:06.

 

"... and then he said, 'Well, the thing is, Mags, that wasn't regular chocolate milk!' Madre del Dios, and they say tequila gives you the runs!" The two burst out laughing. Flesher pats Magnifico on the back, then says, "So, man, speaking of tequila...."

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

"So what's yours?" Magnifico seems genuinely interested.

 

"Well, they invited me to the Clan barbeque right before I started the Durandal bit. I put on my best Hawaiian shirt, and ...."

 

The minutes tick off the clock. Flesher looks over now and then, and finally, around 9:20, he wraps it up with, "... milling around in black-rose Hawaiian shirts, eating a pork roast molded to look like Edwin! I didn't know what the hell to do!" Magnifico grins, then points to the bottle.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

As the time passes, Flesher and Magnifico discuss varying topics such as their favorite matches...

 

Flesher finishes his story about locking Ash into the Total Nightmare to win his second SJL World Championship. Magnifico just stares icily, and says, "You know, we in the Carnival LIKE Ash." Flesher looks uneasily at the clock, which reads 10:15, and hastily grabs the bottle.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

... to their title reigns....

 

"I've won the SJL World Championship twice, a European strap, and my baby, the US belt over there."

 

"SWF World, Tag, and four Light Heavyweight, including right now."

 

Flesher sighs, and looks at the clock. 11:34. Great. He just missed the Simpsons.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

... and finally, their drinking prowess.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

1:45. As long as he can get 33 hours of sleep tonight, and his surefire hangover cure Sunday morning, he'll be fine for Smarkdown.

 

Salt, shot, lime.

 

Finally, as the clock clicks over to 2:40, Flesher and Magnifico sit together on the futon, laughing. It looks like they've had a long, enjoyable time, and ELM is getting ready to take off. He gets up unsteadily (the product of one too many shots, and three too many Coronas), and Flesher does the same. The Carnivan pair walks toward the door, and Flesher pats his Midnight Carnival counterpart happily on the back before handing him the nearly-empty bottle of Jose Cuervo.

 

"Yo, man, I'm really... GLAD you came tonight!" Both are quite clearly gone, by this point. That is to say, it's all over but the puking. "And I'm glad we worked all this shit out! So, as my gift to you, take the rest of the bottle!"

 

The Luchadore replies, "Yeah, man, me too! You gon' have to come to my place in Cali some time, mi amigo nuevo!"

 

"And lemme tell you, man... it's really cool of you to let me keep my title shot!"

 

"No problemo! It'll be a hell of an exbi... exer... exhi... a hell of a match... especially for a match against a gringo."

 

"And, Mags... I promise you, hoss my cart and hope to die... stick a FUCKING eedle in Bill Nye... I promise you, Magnifico, I will take it FUCKING easy on you!"

 

Almost immediately, Magnifico's grin falls and his face falls into a mixture of anger and disbelief.

 

" ... excuse me?"

 

"I said I'll take it easy on you, Mags. You know, carry you a little bit?"

 

Magnifico looks like Flesher just asked to stick his finger in his nose. "What... the FUCK... are you talking about?"

 

"Aw, man, no need to bust nuts. That's your problem. You stay 'on' too much. I just wanted you to come over for a few drinks, get to know you better... and here, you're putting up a fuss about losing the belt just cuz you think you have to keep up appearances. Well, listen, none of your fans are here, so you don't need to pretend. Listen, I told you, I'll put you over a little, but even if I squashed you, everyone knows there ain't no shame being beaten by a master."

 

Magnifico just stares, completely stunned at Flesher's ego trip.

 

"But listen, Mags, you've got a hell of a talent." Flesher pats his Mexican friend on the shoulder and says, "You'll go far someday."

 

With that, ELM grabs the bottle and swings it wildly, nailing Flesher in the side of the head. Flesher collapses to the floor, and with that, Magnifico walks out the door. Before he shuts it, though, he turns around and shouts, "See you at Ground Zero, esse!" He slams the door so hard that the entire room rattles, and Flesher's US Title belt falls from the coffee table to the floor. The camera zooms in to see a trickle of blood running out of the bruise on Flesher's temple, and with that, we...

 

Fade.

[Guest Kibagami]

"I mean, doing the lucha hung over is some shit."

 

FLESHER RULES THE PROMOS.

 

Bangin' character work on both sides of the fence. I really, really liked the way Flesher's arrogance came into play at the end of the promo. Didn't see that ending coming at all, man. Keep up the good work.

 

S.

[Guest Rabbi_wilson13]

Muy, muy bien. Flesher can take Edwin's place at the roundtables from now on, and this match is going to be so freaking awesome. Promos and build up and matches set up before the actual ppv card, oh my!

 

Flesher, you just rocked my promo world. Awesome work.

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

Another man who can swing bottles with Mag! Beautiful!

 

That truly rocked. One of the most original, awesome, and kick-ass promos I've ever read, period. I'm gonna go read it again right now. Seriously. The LHW/US match, whatever you want to call it, just became my most anticipated for Ground Zero.

[Guest TheBostonStrangler]

YES! Drunken violence! Just what we needed!

[Guest Tyler McClelland]

Probably the best fued-developing promo series we've had in some time.

 

Good job by both of you.

[Guest kelloggs]

This lowely Franchise gives it two thumbs up

 

M. Francis

[Guest chirs3]

Wearing the US Title out gets you laid?!

 

I DEMAND A REMATCH!

 

Er... uh... I mean... good promo!

[Guest midnight_burn]

Delicious promo, i love it.

 

With that, i'm now even more psyched to read the ELM/Flesher match at Ground Zero, a match i was already looking forward to.

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

Yeah Raynor... think how much a three time US champ got some.

 

 

Anyway... good promo my little slut... I should beat you down for that title... FOUR time US champ.

 

Random Dude: "You lost the US title three times?"

 

Die.

[Guest Lerrin Breggan]

I really liked the promo a lot! The swerve at the end was very unexpected, and I thought it really brought some heat to this highly anticipated title bout. Bravo!