Promo

[Guest HVilleThugg]

"Yes."

 

...

 

"Yes, I know..."

 

...

 

"No, I'm not..."

 

...

 

"Yo! Stop lecturing me bro...I know...I ain't gonna..."

 

...

 

"Yo, whatever man...look, I won't..."

 

...

 

DING DONG

 

"Look, I ain't gonna do it, so stop worryin' doc. Look, somebody's at the door, so I gotta bounce."

 

...

 

"Ok, I promise...Jesus. Ok...ok...yeah...I'll wear it...ok...yep...ok...bye."

 

Damien McKinney, better known to most as the HVille Thugg, slaps his cell phone close and tosses it to his left, onto the leather sofa. The door bell tolls again, HVT sighs as he passes the dining room table, on which resides a brace for his injured neck. Thugg grabs the brace and snaps it on his neck as he heads for the front door, his mild saunter turning to a frustrated storm when the bell tolls once more.

 

"Jesus fuckin' Christ...just fuckin' wait...I'm coming dammit!"

 

HVT yanks the front door ajar, preparing the give the individual on the other side a serious of his mind, but seems almost disappointed to see the crowned prince of flash and panache and Carnie extraordinare, Edwin MacPhisto standing there with his red trenchcoat flowing in the humid DC breeze and a smirk on his face.

 

(HVT) - YO!!! What up playa??

 

(Edwin) - It's chizzy-chill on the downlow wit my peeps rollin' in da six-four, blastin' gats and bustin' caps, fo' it's all gizzy-good in da hizzy-hood...fo' sheezy?

 

(HVT) - I knew I should have never let you go to that "Learn Ebonics in 10 Days" course...you're mixin' your east coast and west coast slang.

 

(Edwin) - Eh...It sounds crappy with my accent anyway...anyway, how's it hangin' big guy?

 

(HVT) - It's all good, you know? Come in yo...

 

Edwin walks into Thugg's Georgetown townhouse...or should I say, mini-mansion, and stares around as Thugg closes the door behind him. A sense of awe creeps onto Edwin's face as he sees how Thugg has fixed up his usually smoked out crib with authentic oriental tapestry, persian rugs, and other foriegn artworks.

 

(Edwin) - Bloody hell man...you really hooked this place up since I was last here.

 

(HVT) - Hahahaha...yeah...Sarah did that...before she left a few weeks ago that is. So, what brings you to my hood playa?

 

HVT leads Edwin into the living room as Edwin basically avoids the question, for now.

 

(Edwin) - Oh, you know...just poppin' in. I was in the area...How's the neck?

 

(HVT) - Oh...this {pointing to his brace} it's ok. Not bad actually...I got lucky because I didn't do any damage to my spinal cord...but you know yo...rehab now and all that ish. I think I'm fine, but my doctor is all up on my case cause he thinks I'm gonna go back to the ring or something...

 

Edwin and HVT take a seat on the couch...just so you know.

 

(Edwin) - Speaking of which...how long till you come back man?

 

(HVT) - Come back? Yo, for real...I don't think I'll ever be back son.

 

(Edwin) - What in the name of orphan Annie do you mean you'll never be back?

 

(HVT) - I don't know yo...it's just like...why? Come back for what?

 

(Edwin) - How about revenge! How about revenge on Stubby, King, Bo, Sacred, and Jay Dawg for breaking your freaking neck?!? How about returning for that?!?

 

(HVT) - Whatever yo...I ain't worried about them bitches. They'll get theirs...and I ain't gotta come back to have my revenge. Yo, when did you get so violently set on revenge?? You used to be the jokester or whatever?

 

(Edwin) - Is it that obvious?

 

(HVT) - I'm just sayin' yo...something ain't right with you.

 

(Edwin) - Well, you know...stress. Have you been watching?

 

(HVT) - Off and on.

 

(Edwin) - Well, you know...Wilson, Mag 7, Creative Control...which is Stubby's new group, by the way...The Clan...Silent...you know, I'm just under a lot of stress right now.

 

(HVT) - Damn yo...you know what you need?

 

(Edwin) - Don't even go there...I know what you're going to say, so don't even bother...

 

HVT starts to laugh outloud as he reaches into the couch cushion...

 

(Edwin) - Dude...I'm serious man, I don't want to smoke that shit.

 

...and pulls out a bright yellow ball.

 

(HVT) - Yo man...it's a stress ball. I'm just sayin'...you're awfully high strung. I'm tellin' you, if you squeeze that and then let off a couple rounds of yo gat...you be feelin' good.

 

Edwin takes the ball from Thugg, with a look of "smile and nod" on his face.

 

(Edwin) - Yeeeaaaaahhhhh....ok.

 

(HVT) - Yo man, you tryin' to stick around and grub...I got some Collard greens and fried chicken on.

 

(Edwin) - I can't man...I gotta catch a flight to Minneapolis.

 

(HVT) - Wait...then why you over in my neck of the woods...this ain't no where near Minneapolis?

 

(Edwin) - Well...I was hoping that you'd come with me.

 

(HVT) - Come with you? For what yo?

 

(Edwin) - Well, I was thinking that you'd come on over to Storm with me, and you know....beat the living snot out of Jay Dawg.

 

HVT's smile turns completely upside down and his face clinches with anger...

 

(HVT) - Yo man...I ain't comin' back. Why you all up on it like that?

 

(Edwin) - Haven't you heard that JD challenged you to a hardcore match at Apocalypse?

 

(HVT) - Yeah, Pete called last week to see if I was watching Jay Dawg. I saw him beat the crap out of Kivell...I saw him beat up Annie...I saw him beat up Renegade. I seen all that shit.

 

(Edwin) - Well?

 

(HVT) - Well! Well nothing. Yo, I ain't worried about no mutha fuckin' Jay Dawg. Fuck a Jay Dawg! If he wants to call me out and try to lure me back, then fine...that don't mean I gotta fuckin' jump.

 

(Edwin) - But Damien...think about how he took you out...broke your neck.

 

(HVT) - Oh please yo...Jay Dawg? Jay Dawg was nothing more than a pawn in the grand plan of Stubby. Why would I give a fuck about Jay Dawg?

 

(Edwin) - Well, maybe...just maybe, you could use this opportunity to get back at Stubby for setting you up. Ever think of that?

 

(HVT) - Yo....now you're lunchin'. Do you think that Stubby gives a fuck about Jay Dawg?!? Do you think that if I come wit you, beat up Jay Dawg...do you think Stubby will care? Fuck no he won't. Stubby don't give a fuck about JD...and I don't give a fuck about JD. The only think I'm gonna get if I go to Storm is a police escort back to the airport...no fuckin' thanks.

 

(Edwin) - Damn man...I never thought I'd see the day.

 

(HVT) - What day Edwin?!? Huh? What fuckin' day?!?

 

(Edwin) - The day that the big, bad Thugg backed down and went soft? Man, the Thugg I knew would never let nobody talk shit about him...I remember the wars we had man. I remember how just a few words about you would send you into a rage that usually ended with shattered bones and broken bodies...what happened to that man?

 

(HVT) - What?!? What about you Edwin? Huh? What about you and your little Union Jack and shit?!? Don't think I haven't noticed that you're a completely different person yo. Don't think that I don't know that you're hiding something from everyone. And don't think that I don't know that it's eating away at you, and you're about ready to snap. So what about you Mr. high and mighty...huh? You need to worry about yourself and figure your own shit out instead of telling me that I'm soft.

 

(Edwin) - So what? You're tellin' me that you're gonna let Jamie come out night after night and call you out, insult you...while you sit back here and do nothing?!? Is that what you're saying? Because they guy I know would have been at the arena and pounding Jay Dawg into dust before he even finished his promo.

 

(HVT) - Look yo...Jay Dawg is nothing...a spec...a measley weasel who's worth is as minimal as his genitals. I'm retired yo...and it's gonna take a little more than JD talkin' shit to pull me out. For Stubby....yeah, maybe...but JD...pfft...fuck no.

 

(Edwin) - Damn man...I just thought that you'd jump at the chance to get revenge on any one of them...

 

(HVT) - {completely ignoring what Edwin just said} Wait. Why are you so damn interested in my coming back to beat up on Jay Dawg. Don't you have enough to worry about??

 

(Edwin) - Hey man...don't get mad a me. I'm just tryin' to give you an opportunity to get some revenge...that's all.

 

(HVT) - But I mean...sounds a little strange that with all you have goin' down, that you'd be 1800 miles from where you should be, just to beg me to come back, especially when you could have just called.

 

Edwin stares at Thugg's accusing eyes, and then at his watch.

 

(Edwin) - Ok man, well...I got a flight to catch.

 

Edwin stands as does HVT, and an awkward silence ensues...

 

(HVT) - Yeah...

 

HVT leads Edwin to the front door in silence, the awkwardness of the moment getting the best of the usually talkative companions. As HVT opens the door, and Edwin walks out...HVT grabs Edwin's shoulder..

 

(HVT) - You can tell Jay Dawg that I ain't comin' so...he can take his challenges and shove 'em up his ass. If he gives you any flack, you just tell that son of a bitch that he didn't hold up his end of the deal since he lost to Silent.

 

(Edwin) - How'd you...

 

(HVT) - Chris called me right after the show and told me all about the conversation.

 

(Edwin) - {playfully} You jackass! Why'd you make me go through all that then...

 

(HVT) - Just tryin' to see if you'd come clean yourself. It's cool though...I know you're goin' through a lot right now.

 

HVT gives Edwin a pound, and pulls him in close so he can whisper to him...

 

(HVT) - I don't give a fuck what's goin' down, if you ever try to talk me into a trap like that again, you'll find out why I'm more dangerous than Wilson, or Thoth, or Silent...cause even with a broken neck, I will wreck your shit.

 

Edwin rears back just enough to look directly into Thugg's eyes to see how serious he truly is. They stare at each other for what seems like an eternity, before Edwin starts to back away and walk down towards his rental car. Thugg calls out to him...

 

(HVT) - Edwin...you my dogg....let that shit go. It's in the past man...let it go cause it's fuckin' your head up.

 

Edwin nods depressingly, as he heads towards his car, his mind racing about everything that's been going on. He didn't even realize what he was trying to do...how could he try to talk his friend into walking into a trap? Damn...has it shit gotten this bad?

 

Edwin gets in his car as HVT looks on from his porch. Once inside, Edwin puts his hand on his forehead, running his fingers through his red hair, before slamming his fist on the dash board and then screeching his tires as he peels out, leaving a small cloud of smoke in his wake.

 

(HVT) - Damn yo...he's trippin'.

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

::takes note to never inadvertantly try to trap the Thugg again::

 

So, so good. Awesome to see a promo from someone on the shelf, especially if it's leading to something. Captured Edwin's evolving character perfectly, and man...just JD calling you out, just you talking shit about him, it makes JD feel like a real huge frickin' menace. I would mark so, so hard for a match, if it does come to that.

[Guest Insanityman]

"(HVT) - YO!!! What up playa??

 

(Edwin) - It's chizzy-chill on the downlow wit my peeps rollin' in da six-four, blastin' gats and bustin' caps, fo' it's all gizzy-good in da hizzy-hood...fo' sheezy?

 

(HVT) - I knew I should have never let you go to that "Learn Ebonics in 10 Days" course...you're mixin' your east coast and west coast slang."

 

That is godlike.

 

 

"HVT starts to laugh outloud as he reaches into the couch cushion...

 

(Edwin) - Dude...I'm serious man, I don't want to smoke that shit.

 

...and pulls out a bright yellow ball.

 

(HVT) - Yo man...it's a stress ball. I'm just sayin'...you're awfully high strung. I'm tellin' you, if you squeeze that and then let off a couple rounds of yo gat...you be feelin' good.

 

Edwin takes the ball from Thugg, with a look of "smile and nod" on his face.

 

(Edwin) - Yeeeaaaaahhhhh....ok."

 

Another great part.

 

All in all, an awesome promo.

[Guest chirs3]

I think Edwin should stick to ebonics.

 

(Edwin) - It's chizzy-chill on the downlow wit my peeps rollin' in da six-four, blastin' gats and bustin' caps, fo' it's all gizzy-good in da hizzy-hood...fo' sheezy?

 

Gold. Absolute gold.

 

Great promo from the Thuggster.

[Guest Rabbi_wilson13]

Haha...that was great.

 

Sure, he has time to write promos but he can't write matches. Who does Thugg fear?

 

Oh yeah, that be me.

 

A cripple more dangerous than I...riiiiight.

 

Anyway, that was fo-sheezying awesome, and we need a hardcore/ICTV/SWF title four way with JD, me, Edwin and Thugg. That would just equal greatness to a degree I can't even speak of.

 

And I'm off! WHOOOOOOOOOOOSH!

[Guest realitycheck]

"HVT starts to laugh outloud as he reaches into the couch cushion...

 

(Edwin) - Dude...I'm serious man, I don't want to smoke that shit.

 

...and pulls out a bright yellow ball.

 

(HVT) - Yo man...it's a stress ball. I'm just sayin'...you're awfully high strung. I'm tellin' you, if you squeeze that and then let off a couple rounds of yo gat...you be feelin' good.

 

Edwin takes the ball from Thugg, with a look of "smile and nod" on his face.

 

(Edwin) - Yeeeaaaaahhhhh....ok."

Bahahaha! I know IL already quoted it, but still, it's funny. (Oh, and I needed some more stuff to pad my post.)

 

Anyway, a promo from someone who's RETIRED, bah gawd. I agree with Edwin, that you talking shit about JD DOES make him look like a real badass. Tis' a shame if a match were to ever happen between you two, JD would never live up to his billing.

[Guest HVilleThugg]

Well, the point WAS to make JD look like a badass. Although, he's doing a pretty good job of it on his own. I know your all used to me holding people down....but this time....sorry....gotta pump him up a little bit.

 

Sorry to the Kliq...we'll go back to holding JD down now.

 

Da "truly sorry" H

[Guest Thoth]

What IS the difference between east-coast and west-coast?

 

And I think Edwin should've done some grass. I'd have laughed.

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

Come on you chicken shit cripple!

 

Bring it on!

[Guest kelloggs]

Thugg writes a promo...yo get back to studying

 

Anyways this had funny lines out the ass and others have already posted on them so I'll just slide on back down to the JL and put off writing my match some more.

 

M. Francis

[Guest Perfect_Bo]

Ok, it may of been Stubby's 'plan', but I FUCKIN BROKE YOUR NECK... Just wanted to clear that up...

 

Great promo...

 

Bo

[Guest Beingz0wningj00]

You know if that happens Wilson... you'd end up more crippled then HVT.

 

 

and I would hold three titles at once.