Guest Kotzenjunge Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Pasted from an AIM conversation... Kotzenjunge: Mary-Keith and I spent no less than nine hours together our first day with just us. Kotzenjunge: (listens to Mixaroonie IX) Kotzenjunge: What the hell was I going to download??? Marney: I can't imagine spending 9 hours around someone I want without having sex. <g> I'd go insane. What kind of thing were you going to DL? Kotzenjunge: It was a song, but now I've forgotten. Marney: Pop? Rock? Metal? Kotzenjunge: Oh, the nine hours was just me gradually getting closer to her, let alone anything else. Marney: You really are shy. <g> Kotzenjunge: I think by the end of our time I had my arm behind her, not really around her. Kotzenjunge: I was shy with her! It was weird! Kotzenjunge: Ask anyone who knows me, and they'll tell you I'm a freaking nuclear reactor of energy and outwardness. Kotzenjunge: Someone put a lead suit on me or something. Marney: I went on a date once with a straight girl who wasn't sure if she might be kind of slightly gay. After one hour of talking about movies and having a couple of drinks, I just took her chin and kissed her out of the blue, and said, "Okay. Wanna fuck?" Kotzenjunge: And worse yet, in the last week she was here before she left, I had SO MANY opportunities to make SOME kind of move. Marney: You have to take them, man. For all you know, she's waiting for you to do just that. Kotzenjunge: I know she was waiting!!! Kotzenjunge: Here's the second worst instance: Kotzenjunge: Us, on my roof, watching the meteor shower after Raw. Marney: Oh, that is so golden. Kotzenjunge: We're both standing there, facing each other. She's shorter, so I'm looking down at her. She tugs on my beard slightly. Kotzenjunge: And this was where I FUCK UP. Marney: Oh God. Kotzenjunge: Not really used to the beard yet, let alone people touching it(only had it since late June, when it crossed the stubble/beard line)... Kotzenjunge: I immediately... um... jerked my head backwards. Marney: <groans> Kotzenjunge: But she was still standing there! Marney: And then? Kotzenjunge: I didn't really notice the "DO SOMETHING!" body language and facial expression until afterward, so I said something about my beard and then screamed at myself in my brain five seconds later when I realized how much I FUCKED UP. Kotzenjunge: I almost yelled at myself right there. Marney: What did she do? Kotzenjunge: We were up there for a little while longer, but I was just SO DAMN ASHAMED of myself, I hardly looked at her. Kotzenjunge: In retrospect, she looked kinda disappointed. Kotzenjunge: After she left, I said to myself: "She thinks I'm GAY!" Marney: ...which probably made her feel absolutely awful. <slaps Patrick around a bit for Mary> Christ man, she didn't think you're gay, she thought you didn't want her. That's what I'd think in that situation. Marney: Was that the last time you saw her? Kotzenjunge: Yeah, duh. Kotzenjunge: No. Kotzenjunge: The last time I saw her ranks as the #1 FUCKUP. Kotzenjunge: Let me set the stage: Kotzenjunge: She's leaving tomorrow. Kotzenjunge: We went out for lunch, and she's driving me home. Kotzenjunge: We're parked outside of my house. Marney: I can't imagine what could be worse, but I'm listening... Kotzenjunge: And we sat there... Kotzenjunge: And sat there... Kotzenjunge: And I counted some eighteen opportunities I had... Kotzenjunge: And an hour later, we said goodbye to each other. Kotzenjunge: And I said right to her face: "I wussed out." Kotzenjunge: She got a knowing look on her face then. Kotzenjunge: As if to say "well, at least he knows he fucked up!" Kotzenjunge: So I resolved to call her that night, and tell her all I wanted to and stuff. Kotzenjunge: I called her all right... and wussed out AGAIN! Marney: Jesus. Young 'uns, DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU!!!!!! Do NOT follow my example in this case!!!!! Fo shyness, Kotzenjunge Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Incandenza Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Jeez, man. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kotzenjunge Report post Posted September 4, 2002 (cries) Fo sheez, Kotzenjunge Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Incandenza Report post Posted September 4, 2002 I've been there, if it makes you feel any better. ::shudders at memories of high school years:: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kinetic Report post Posted September 4, 2002 I'm pretty similar in that area, though I've gotten better through experience. It's no coincidence that the only relationship I've ever really enjoyed is the one where the girl basically pounced on me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kotzenjunge Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Kinetic, our similarities are starting to worry me. Fortunately our differences are great enough to keep me from thinking we got the same chip planted in our heads. Fo sheez, Kotzenjunge EDIT: Except the one relationship I had sucked because the girl pounced on me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Incandenza Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Whenever I found myself stumped for something to say (or do) in that kind of situation, I usually would make a joke over my inability to say something at that moment. Such gentle self-deprecation tends to work. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kotzenjunge Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Yeah, I did that like mad, but it was almost done too much. Fo sheez, Kotzenjunge Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kinetic Report post Posted September 4, 2002 I was insanely happy when she pounced on me. It eliminated all of the awkwardness that usually occurs on dates. That one act of pouncing helped create a relationship built on a solid foundation of mutual respect and fucking. I'm eternally grateful to her for doing that and have been disappointed in each subsequent relationship for not being like that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Incandenza Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Moderation is the key, obviously. EDIT: Directed at Kotz, not Kinetic, who I herald for having a wild, sexual relationship with a special someone. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 4, 2002 I've used my amazing powers of joke making to make up for my many... many flaws. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kotzenjunge Report post Posted September 4, 2002 I was happy because it eliminated any need on my part to do any work, not to mention a girl actually fancied me!! I was mad later because it left me just as unable to hook up with anyone after we broke up. Fo sheez, Kotzenjunge Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Of course what do I know... I'm engaged and have a baby so this whole "joke" thing got me locked in for life. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest TJH Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Strewth, my mind is blown away Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest DARRYLXWF Report post Posted September 4, 2002 I dont care. Oh and by the way TJH, it's spelt 'struth' Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest J*ingus Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Bah, you amateurs in the ranks of the shy, behold the awesome monstrosity of patheticness that is my post in the "have you ever been in love with someone unattainable" thread, page 4. Read it and weep, and I mean that with all sincerety. Kotz, you display fine raw talent for being a member of the soldiers of meekness, but you are far, far away from being the God of the Wallflowers who walks amongst you under the name Jingus, may he reign forever and ever while staring longingly from a dark corner. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Dames 0 Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Some comments... 1. What kind of a girl is named Mary-Keith? 2. Marney, did she realize what she wanted after you kissed that girl? 3. Spoon, my man, even I've been there...I've got some stories that you wouldn't believe, but I'm too weak right now to write it all down. I'll definitely tell you some when you get here next week. Dames Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Agent of Oblivion Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Pretty much every guy has at least one coward story. I'd have gone for it on the beard tug for sure though, that's basically a pounce. I used to be a total chickenshit, f'rinstance, there was a girl who I KNEW for a FACT, was into me, and the feeling was completely mutual. it took me a week to actually make a move. That week was the worst nauseatingly obvious body language, basically point blank blatant speech as well. we eventually hooked up, but it ended up just being a fling, I think we both went in with expectations WAY too high for each other. I still get cowardly with women that intimidate me, which is odd, because I'm intimidated by shy girls. Figure that out. I totally click with aggressive girls, and my most meaningful relationships have been of the "pounce" variety. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Cancer Marney Report post Posted September 4, 2002 2. Marney, did she realize what she wanted after you kissed that girl? Oh yes, sir. Yes indeed. mmm. That memory was almost enough to make me smile in spite of my godawful hangover. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Agent of Oblivion Report post Posted September 4, 2002 Bah, you amateurs in the ranks of the shy, behold the awesome monstrosity of patheticness that is my post in the "have you ever been in love with someone unattainable" thread, page 4. Read it and weep, and I mean that with all sincerety. Kotz, you display fine raw talent for being a member of the soldiers of meekness, but you are far, far away from being the God of the Wallflowers who walks amongst you under the name Jingus, may he reign forever and ever while staring longingly from a dark corner. He ain't kiddin' folks. Fucking awesome post. And mine afterwards doesn't hold a candle to it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Breetai Report post Posted September 4, 2002 That beard thing made my groan out loud. Ouch. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites