Promo: In the Fade

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

“All right, Mark. I’m not your friend. I don’t pretend to be that anymore. But this is business. We need to get somewhere on this.”

 

“Brian, I told you--”

 

“Don’t give us that shit, Stevens. We keep asking you the same question, and you keep popping out some bullshit answer. You’re not telling us what you know.”

 

Mark Stevens has had enough.

 

“God dammit!” he shouts, rising up out of his chair to tower over his two interrogators. “I don’t know a damn thing! I don’t know what ever gave you the impression that I did, but whatever it is, it’s wrong!”

 

The Suicide King, leaning back with his feet across Stubby’s desk, rolls his eyes and shoots a glance at the commissioner. Stubby extinguishes a half-spent cigarette in his crusty old ashtray, and keeps his head hung low.

 

“Sit down, Mark.”

 

Stevens clenches his fist…and listens to his Commissioner.

 

The room is hot and arid. It’s late, and no one wants to be here. But there’s business to be dealt with, whether they like it or not.

 

“Let’s go over the facts,” mutters King, pulling his feet down off the desk and leaning forward, “one more time. Sunday night. Edwin, beloved hero of millions, breaks Raynor’s neck--”

 

“It was a fracture--”

 

“Whatever, Mark. Chris is in a brace and he probably won’t wrestle again. Good enough for government work, I always say. Edwin gets all spacey and ducks out of the arena before the show’s over…and no one sees him go.”

 

The ceiling fan spins, lightly and loosely.

 

“Looks that way.”

 

“Not one person, Mark?”

 

“Everyone was focusing on Raynor,” murmurs Stevens, leaning back. “And everybody who wasn’t was getting ready for the rest of the night’s action. It’s easy for someone to slip out amidst all the hustle and the bustle.”

 

“Edwin MacPhisto isn’t just someone,” snaps Stubby. “He’s a former world champ, one of our biggest stars, and he isn’t fucking here.” Stevens opens his mouth, but Stubby cuts him off before he can get a word in. “Zenon quit. Edwin’s still got a bit of a grudge with Magnifico. He never pals around with Thoth anymore. You’re the only person he’s close to here anymore, Stevens.”

 

“Are you accusing me of something? Because if you are, I’d really like to know what you’re saying, Stubby, so I can properly defend myself. I don’t like these parlor games.”

 

“Fine, Mark. Fuck all, all right?” quips King. “I’m gonna lay it out for you. Edwin MacPhisto’s gone AWOL, and supposedly no one knows where he’s gone. He may be a silly little bitch, and he might be stressing about busting Raynor up, but he’s a damn big star, and he’s in breach of contract, and he had better get his ass back here before we levy some serious punishment down on him. And you know where he is.”

 

“I don’t have a god-damn clue, Brian!” shouts Stevens. “I don’t know why you two have such a hard time squaring up with this. I’m a stand-up guy. Always have been. I don’t actually think I’m capable of lying anymore. Isn’t that why you two aren’t my pals in the first place?”

 

“I don’t give a crap about any of your honor bullshit, Stevens. I’m the commissioner,” warns Stubby, “and I have a job to do. My job is to keep shit in order, and keep tabs on our wrestlers. And right now, by covering for your little friend, you’re making it really damn hard for me to do that.”

 

Mark blinks, and then meets Stubby’s gaze, head-on, unwavering.

 

“On this matter, Stubby…I don’t know a damn thing.”

 

King and Stubby might not agree, but one thing’s for certain: Mark Stevens never lies.

 

 

***

 

 

About this time, in Lincoln, Nebraska, a phone rings.

 

Once.

 

Twice.

 

Three times.

 

After the fourth ring, the machine picks up.

 

“Hi, you’ve reached Lynn and Mark, but you know, you haven’t really reached us. Cause we’re not here right now—what? Oh, come on Lynn, it’s funny, the kids’ll love it—anyway, you know the drill. Talk at the beep, we’ll call you back.”

 

There’s a crackle and a cough…and a familiar, British-tinged voice.

 

“Hey Mark. You won’t get this for a while, but that’s good. It didn’t feel right up and leaving without a word to you. I’m out of here, Mark. Everything I need has disappeared, and it’s time for me to go. You’ve seen me go through a lot, and now I’m certain I need an out. I don’t know where I’m going or what I’m doing, but it’s something, thank bloody god. It’s a new beginning, Mark, leaving all these awful threads behind. You can tell Chris that I’m sorry but that some things just have to be done, and tell Silent that someday it’ll be my turn to find him…but don’t tell anyone where I am. That won’t be too hard, because I’m certainly not telling you…anyway, Mark. Don’t try to do the right thing. Don’t come looking for me. Do not, I repeat, do not come looking for me. You’ll be hunting ghosts.”

 

There’s a pause.

 

“Thanks for the good times, friend. I’ll see you around…someday.”

 

Click.

 

 

***

 

 

There’s an old myth about the eyes. It’s got do with the old notion of humours—the colored fluids inside us that made up our dispositions, our moods, and our meanings. Red meant passion, blue meant calm, brown was of the earth…green meant envy, and yellow meant cowardice. These colors reflected what was going with the soul, the real root of a person. People whose eyes could change colors were looked at as sages, as mystics, even if it was just an issue of pigment. One question no one ever really could answer, though: when it gets late at night, and hazel gets dim, or crystal blue fades…what’s to be made of the ones with grey eyes?

 

The pay phone clacks back into place firmly, and the man checks with the waitress.

 

“Just a couple minutes,” she says. He nods, and ducks to the bathroom.

 

A few minutes later, he emerges, rattling a small case in his pocket. It’s been a long time since he’s seen himself this way. He blinks, stretching his eyelids, getting used to the empty sensation.

 

“How’re we doing now, dear Betty?”

 

“Pecan waffle and a coffee to go, mister, right here.” She shoves a large paper bag his way. “It’s $3.90.” The man reaches past the contact case, deep into his pocket, for one neatly pressed bill, handing it over as he takes the bag.

 

“Keep the change, dear. Thank you.”

 

“You have a nice night, hon. Careful out there,” she says. “You look tired. Where you headed?”

 

He laughs as he turns for the door. “I’m not quite sure. We’ll leave that one up to chance, all right?” Betty nods and gives a wink, and he steps outside.

 

Grey eyes and all, Edwin MacPhisto steps into the fade.

[Guest Ace309]

...

 

wow.

 

I mean, seriously, man, that may be one of the best promos I've ever seen. It ties together what Edwin's doing, why he did it, and what the effect is on his closest friends and the people who depend on him.

 

I knew the Edwin-Raynor angle was good, but... damn.

[Guest Divefire]

Well, at least you didn't kill yourself or anything to over dramatic.

 

I watched you enter this business and now I get to watch you walk away. In your wake you're leaving a legend behind that I hope will inspire others and myself to take greater strides to glory in what we can accomplish in this crazy world of e-wrestling.

 

It's been a fine journy watching the story of Edwin MacPhisto unfold, if this is the end, then a fine end it is. If not, even better.

[Guest AnnieEclectic]

Damn.

 

What's to be done, now that all the threads have left? What becomes of the Kliq now, with the last standing member gone?

 

Hopefully it's not the end, but if it is, I can't think of a better way for Edwin MacPhisto to have gone out.

 

 

cheers.

 

-Annie

[Guest SupaTaft]

I honestly do not know what to say.

 

I don't actively follow the WF but... damn. Edwin man, you are probably one of the coolest cats on these boards, IC and OoC. Sad to see you go but damn its the right way to do so.

 

Alright, back to being selfish. What are we to do with the JL matches? Edwin has gone and obviously cant commish anymore? Nor can he be a commentator. What are we lowly JLers to do?

 

-Taft

[Guest Kibagami]

Quite the graceful exit, Edwin Mac. All the spot-on character dialogue and vivid description we've come to expect from you. Come back soon, man.

 

Until we meet again, MacPhisto...

 

...and people, you know that we will, don't you?

 

;D

 

S.

[Guest El Luchadore Magnifico]

*sigh*

 

The man that brought about my face turn and welcomed me into the Carnival is gone. Hell, that's probably the least of your accomplishments, too.

 

Damn, thought I'd never see the day...g'bye Edwin, and good luck.

[Guest Powerplay]

Wow. Truly one of the greatest losses this e-fed will ever have. I remember watching you back in June when you were the lovable, zany Brit, and I've watched Edwin become so much more than I originally thought he was. I'm still in shock that Edwin could ever leave, it makes even me, a new guy, feel strange. The end of that, I kinda thought of the end song of the Remake of Ocean's 11 (If you want it, it is called 69 Police. I seriously recommend listening to it while reading the last section of it ), cause the way he exits. He, just like the song, has that "Everything is gonna be alright" feel to him. It's the start of a new day, and Edwin MacPhisto is wide awake to greet it.

 

Cheers, O' Great One

[Guest Thoth]

There goes the greatest of all time, the man who inspired me and so many of us.

 

I never thought people like Edwin and Raynor and such would go away... but times are times, and everyone's run has to stop... sometime.

 

Hard to believe... damn hard to believe.

[Guest Insanityman]

God damn. Edwin, I'm at a lost for words. Everything was perfect... but thanks for all your help. No joke, you've helped me around every bend and I appericate it a lot. Way to make your exit, and one day I wish I could write like you...

 

 

 

Damn.

[Guest DiabloIIFreak1010]

To quote Thoth, there goes on of the greatest off all times.

 

I guess there's nothing left to say but goodbye, Edwin MacPhisto. Your memory and legacy lives on in our hearts.

 

We love you Edwin. We really do.

 

...You know. In that...non-homosexual way...

[Guest redbaron51]

[Guest Edwin MacPhisto]

Thanks for the kind words, everybody. Like every other retired bum around this place, I'm going to try to keep up with the shows and happenings. The developing world title scene between JD, Sacred, and Mag is going to be hot as hell...and honestly, I really want to take a harder look at the JL too.

 

And we all come back some day, don't we? Maybe. Thanks again.

[Guest Rabbi_wilson13]

*tips his hat*

 

We do, Edwin. You think you'll stay away, but it's an IM here or there, and it sucks you back in. You'll be back. At least we all can hope.

[Guest TheBostonStrangler]

We love you Edwin. We really do.

 

...You know. In that...non-homosexual way...

 

Speak for yourself, man.

 

 

But seriously, GREAT promo. It's gonna be weird without Eddie Mac around, but we'll move on. Just make sure you come back someday when you have less work, or you can get motivated to do this again. Until then, live long and prosper, man.

[Guest Ash Ketchum]

My idol is gone.

 

The man I've always wanted to be, the one I've always dreamed I could be as successful is... is gone.

 

I don't know if I'll ever be as good as you, but I hope that I can be 1/10 as successful as you were.

 

It's sad to see ya go, Edwin. I'm actually trying to hold back a few small tears here, but I guess we all have to go sometime.

 

Cheers, old friend. It's been a wild ride, Mr. MacPhisto.

 

One more time for the Crown Prince of Flash and Panache...

 

~Ash~

[Guest crusen86]

Hmm... And with that, another world title contender takes the long walk into nothing.

[Guest kelloggs]

I expected nothing less. All I can say is you really set the standard. I'm sure you'll be back but it's weird not to have you writing anymore. Peace good sir and I await your return.

[Guest chirs3]

Wow.

 

I mean...

 

Wow.

 

That's about all I can say for this.

 

And you WILL come back - it's just not possible to stay away.

[Guest realitycheck]

(This is going to be a little long and ramblish, like anything I write. So, uh, bear with me.)

 

You know, I remember talking to Tod deKindes one night on AIM, back when we were both back in the JL. We were talking about the Carnival, and who would lead it, or what would become of it, as it appeared to be falling away at the time. I said that, "Raynor supplied the Carnies with a lot of their most memorable promos, and could probably take over. But I don't know if he has the presence of Edwin.

 

...then again, god himself probably doesn't have the presence of Edwin MacPhisto."

 

Tom told me I should tell you about that, whenever you retired.

 

I also figured that'd be the best thing to start this with, as I had no idea. Hell, I still don't know what to say... Just to think that I was reading back when you debuted in the ML, all the way to now. ...which, when I reminice about, is actually kind of creepy. Uh, anyway... you were the best this fed ever saw, man, bar none. You are also the coolest, most funk-ay dude I've ever had the pleasure of talking to. Come back whenever you can, Edwin. I'll organize a platoon of people to annoy the fuck out of you on AIM if you don't.

 

-Z

[Guest Suicide King]

Sigh. And with that, at least temporarily, goes the last of the founding members of the Carnival to the land of milk and honey.

 

We've got a comfy chair for you Edwin. Siddown. Your seat is to Mark's left, Raynor's right. I'll deal you in.

 

::the sounds fade, replaced by the clinking of plastic chips::

 

And so another midnight carnival comes to a close... all good children must go home to bed.

[Guest HVilleThugg]

Welcome Edwin...to the home...it's nice. See that chair over there...it's got your name all over it. Oh, and don't worry about meal time or the TV...we have ALL the kliq members in the home now, and we've been working before you got here to hold everyone down. So, we pretty much own the place...see that corpse of a man over there...that used to be Grimedogg...that is...until we crushed his soul. Anyway, you'll be taken care of in here...so go, sit...you've got a nice view at the staring window...all is well in the home.

 

But on the real...damn you...damn you to hell. I mean, you were the only person who upstaged me around here...well, king too...but we don't count him. Everytime I did something, you did it and did it way better! ICTV Title...I get 61 days, you get 60! World title...i get 89 days, you get 108! Retirement...I go out decently and get praise...You go out like a champ, and get the world handed to you. I think we can safely say that the greatest writer ever in the swf has left us...it's sad. but you know what...he'll be back! I'm already working on an angle to bring him back...to bring everyone back...oh...yall just wait...6 months...you're all screwed! The Kliq WILL return...so get it while you can...cause when we return...IT'S BACK TO THE DAMN MIDCARD WITH THE WHOLE LOTTA YA!

 

Da "great times Edwin...great Times!" H

[Guest Grand Slam]

I waited a couple of days to respond to collect my thoughts. And this is the best I could come up with:

 

Damn.

 

Amazing farewell promo Edwin. Amazing. There is something about this, some glimmer of hope at the end, that we might not have seen the end of the Mac Daddy. I hope not. We are all better for having you around.

 

And that leaves ELM to carry on and preserve the good name of the Midnight Carnival. Well, if you need any help my immigrant friend, you know the number. Feel free to call.

 

[Guest BA_Baracus]

PROMO (Stubby P. McWeed);

"I retire to a hellish existence of dealing with you bastards, and Edwin retires to a life of eating pecan waffles.

 

IT'S NOT FAIR I TELLS YA'!

 

Mothernature says..."

[Guest HVilleThugg]

::brings Stubby a Pecan Waffle...you know...a "special" waffle...with a "special kind of "herb" seasoning::

 

It's a hard life...I know...here's something to let you know I care!

 

::also provides 4 Mexican sluts for Stubby to do with what he pleases...one of which happens to be the sister of a certain immigrant SWF superstar::

 

Da "not saying who..." H

[Guest BA_Baracus]

PROMO (Stubby P. McWeed);

"[stubby sends the girls to sit in the corner.]

 

Mmmmm...waffles.

 

Mothernature says..."

[Guest El Luchadore Magnifico]

::also provides 4 Mexican sluts for Stubby to do with what he pleases...one of which happens to be the sister of a certain immigrant SWF superstar::

 

Oooh, it's CIA, right? Right?