Guest Paranoid Report post Posted November 25, 2002 Something to ponder over!!!!!!! The average blue whale produces over 400 gallons of sperm when it ejaculates, but only 10% of that actually makes it into his mate. So 360 gallons are spilled into the ocean everytime one unloads, and you wonder why the ocean is so salty! LOL! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest EQ Report post Posted November 25, 2002 HAHA! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest HBK16 Report post Posted November 25, 2002 WHY! WHY! WHY did you have to tell me that. I am like the biggest beach bum even though I live in Arizona. But that makes sense. lol. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest EricMM Report post Posted November 25, 2002 I'm never EVER going near the ocean again. Ever. There's whale junk everywhere! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest papacita Report post Posted November 25, 2002 And the moral of the story is... NEVER DROWN. Yes, I need a nap. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest HBK16 Report post Posted November 25, 2002 Thinking of all those times I swallowed water. Dammit. That was jiz I have been swallowing. Not only regular jiz, but whale jiz! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest EricMM Report post Posted November 25, 2002 If you do drown, drown in fresh water. In fresh water, your lungs merely get smaller and you run out of oxygen. In salt water, your lungs get salty, absorb too much water, and um ... pop... ITS BAD! Plus you get whale junk all over you and probably have whale sperms trying to inseminate your face. Imagine Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest HBK16 Report post Posted November 25, 2002 If you do drown, drown in fresh water. In fresh water, your lungs merely get smaller and you run out of oxygen. In salt water, your lungs get salty, absorb too much water, and um ... pop... ITS BAD! Plus you get whale junk all over you and probably have whale sperms trying to inseminate your face. Imagine Your only making it worse. lol. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Paranoid Report post Posted November 25, 2002 If you do drown, drown in fresh water. In fresh water, your lungs merely get smaller and you run out of oxygen. In salt water, your lungs get salty, absorb too much water, and um ... pop... ITS BAD! Plus you get whale junk all over you and probably have whale sperms trying to inseminate your face. Imagine That was just wrong. Funny as hell, but wrong! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest EricMM Report post Posted November 25, 2002 Plus a blue whale dong is signifigantly larger than the Big Show. Whales are just dirty. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest The Metal Maniac Report post Posted November 26, 2002 Actually, I believe that I've read somewhere that drowning isn't such a bad way to die. Once your brain runs low enough on oxygen, you start to like, hallucinate, or something, and when you eventually do die, you don't feel anything. Of course, factoring in whale jism kinda changes the equation... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest midnight_burn Report post Posted November 26, 2002 I'll never look at the ocean the same way now. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Bosstones Fan Report post Posted November 26, 2002 Actually, I believe that I've read somewhere that drowning isn't such a bad way to die. Once your brain runs low enough on oxygen, you start to like, hallucinate, or something, and when you eventually do die, you don't feel anything. Uh, actually they say that drowning is one of the worst ways to die. Yes, your brain does go into "shut down" mode when it is deprived of oxygen for a long enough time (so you probably DO get some wicked hallucinations), but I'd think that the massive burning in your lungs from their being filled with water and the other general thoughts of your eminent demise that would be no doubt racing through your head would more than cancel any "wonderful" feelings you might get just before you go. EDIT: I just realized that that may be the longest sentence in the history of mankind. Please excuse my poor grammar. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest HBK16 Report post Posted November 26, 2002 Yeah drowning would be a terrible way of dying. Because you can go a while without air and just being out of air and telling yourself you are going to die would be horrible. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest The Metal Maniac Report post Posted November 26, 2002 Yeah - I kinda figure that the whole build-up part is gonna suck, but hey...if you get badly injured, you can still suffer, linger, and then die. At least with drowning, there is a few happy moments before the big sleep. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Incandenza Report post Posted November 26, 2002 Uh, actually they say that drowning is one of the worst ways to die. Yes, your brain does go into "shut down" mode when it is deprived of oxygen for a long enough time (so you probably DO get some wicked hallucinations), but I'd think that the massive burning in your lungs from their being filled with water and the other general thoughts of your eminent demise that would be no doubt racing through your head would more than cancel any "wonderful" feelings you might get just before you go. EDIT: I just realized that that may be the longest sentence in the history of mankind. Please excuse my poor grammar. Faulkner's done longer. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest imajackoff? Report post Posted November 26, 2002 I think the worst ways of dying are: 1. Being eaten by some kind of animal.-- you live you're whole life just to be part of the food chain. ugh. 2. Fire. Smoke inhalation, and of course the searing heat. 3. Drowning... for the reasons already discussed. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest HBK16 Report post Posted November 26, 2002 Chocked or running out of air in any way wether it be drowning or having someone put a bag over your head would be a bad way of dying. I would rather die quickly and painlessly like I am sure everyone else. Maybe being shot in the head and feel no pain and die instantly. Or maybe just die sleeping. I think that one is better. Less dramatic for everyone. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Texas Small Arms 09 Report post Posted November 26, 2002 It's a wonderful thing that you guys just now found this out. I got that in an email about a month or so ago, way to keep up Paranoid Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Paranoid Report post Posted November 26, 2002 Well, the e-mail just made it my way two days ago. I laughed my ass off! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Texas Small Arms 09 Report post Posted November 26, 2002 Oh I did too, along with make all my friends and co workers puke Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LaParkaYourCar 0 Report post Posted November 26, 2002 Supposedly when you drown right before you die you go into a euphoric state, but you're right before that it would be horrible. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest dreamer420 Report post Posted November 26, 2002 1. Being eaten by some kind of animal.-- you live you're whole life just to be part of the food chain. ugh. That way wouldn't be so bad. It's being part of the solution instead of part of the problem. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest MrRant Report post Posted November 26, 2002 4. Having your balls bitten off and then bleeding to death. That scares the shit out of me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Agent of Oblivion Report post Posted November 26, 2002 I want to die in some glorious off the wall freak accident, like getting hit with a meteorite or getting an anvil dropped on me. Basically I'd like to be crushed by an object falling from the sky, if I got to pick. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest saturnmark4life Report post Posted November 26, 2002 as long as i died INSTANTLY, i wouldn't mind being crushed. But having part of me crushed wouldn't be too much fun. Whales kick ass. I want to come back as a whale in the next life. I'd make a 'sperm whale' joke but i mean really, i'd then have to die wouldn't i? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Agent of Oblivion Report post Posted November 27, 2002 Speaking of jizz, did you know that an average man ejaculates at a speed of 28 MPH? It's true. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest hardyz1 Report post Posted November 27, 2002 Decapitation might be a neat way to die. A bad way to die? Being impaled anally and bleeding to death. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest crandamaniac Report post Posted November 27, 2002 Why does this thread make me think of that story that one poster said about kissing that girl at a party, and then finding out that she had just gave another guy a BJ? And who was that anyways? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Agent of Oblivion Report post Posted November 27, 2002 I'm glad it wasn't me. I don't want any second-hand jizz in my mouth. Or first hand, for that matter. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
