What would happen if Al Wilson died?

[Guest Blayde Starrfyre]

I was discussing this with a friend. Late night mind-wandering stuff. For example, Owen Hart got a tribute show (he deserves a fucking annual tribute PPV, but that's another topic). JYD got a video package. Rick Rude got a little graphic with his picture and the years he lived from. So let's say Al Wilson dies. Obviously he doesn't get a tribute show. They can't put together a video package because his acting is so bad that their audience would be laughing at a dead guy, that's not what they're going for. And they really can't even put the graphic up, because he looks like such a doofus that again it would evoke wholly inappropriate laughter. So what would they do to acknowledge that he died? I decided Michael Cole would probably just say he died and that the WWE offers condolences to his family. Your thoughts?

[Guest dreamer420]

Is someone planning on shooting him before this "Wedding" to Dawn Marie is scheduled to be broadcast.

[Guest treble charged]

Considering his daughter also works for the company, I'm sure they'd do something. I'd doubt they'd make a video package, since all he's done has been comedy anyway, and it would likely come off as a parody.

 

Somehow, though, I doubt that WWE has thought a lot about this.

[Guest Blayde Starrfyre]

Somehow, though, I doubt that WWE has thought a lot about this.

 

Yeah, I doubt the WWE has as much time on their hands as I do.

[TheFranchise 0]

Is someone planning on shooting him before this "Wedding" to Dawn Marie is scheduled to be broadcast.

No, you wrote that wrong, it's "Who's not thinking of shooting him"

[Guest buffybeast]

If Al Wilson died, they would offer their condolences to the Wilson family then move on.

 

I wish the Al Wilson character would die.

[Guest saturnmark4life]

someone kill him, then we'll find out. He said he'd kill himself if Dawn didn't marry him, maybe they should play that card in the angle. I'd watch. Kill the old fuck, whoever he is. (i know who he is, but i like saying that when i discuss Al, whoever he is.)

[Guest Youth N Asia]

They'd bring in Torrie's mom for an HLA angle.

 

They should have never went this far with the angle, the crowd is so not digging it. It's just bad tv. The feud could have worked had they let Dawn win 1 friggin match, instead of having Torrie go over every single time.

 

The last straw for me was right before he proposed:

 

Al: "I'm going to the ring"

 

I was just thinking why does this monkey-fuck get to go to the ring? He's never worked or reffed a match in his life. I shoule be able to "go to the ring" before he does.

[Guest buffybeast]

I was just thinking why does this monkey-fuck get to go to the ring? He's never worked or reffed a match in his life. I shoule be able to "go to the ring" before he does.

 

I think everyone asked that question, why is he going out to the ring to propose? I guess they wanted him to propose in front of the live crowd for effect.

 

The only saving grace about that segment was the commentary.

[Guest Brian]

If Al Wilson died, they'd have another necrophilia angle.

[TheFranchise 0]

And that would be trips way of getting to SD! to go over Brock!

[EL DANDY~! 0]

Man, if Al died, I know for a fact that DEAN Rasumussen and myself would have a collective heart attack ourselves...it would be a tragedy.

[Guest BobbyWhioux]

Ha ha ha ha ha. You think they'd do something. Ha ha ha ha ha.

 

Seriously, they'd have either Jim Ross or Michael Cole (depending on which show came first) mention it, probably from the "here, look at the broadcasters while they say something we're pretending to think is important" angle, coming off a commercial break in the second half of the first hour (at, say, like, 9:38pm), and offer condolensced with rehearsed compassion and empathy.

 

Then Jeff Hardy's music would hit and all would be forgotten as they cut back to the important stuff happening on the entrance ramp.

 

Don't wish for the character to die, though. You just know he'd vow to "not rest in peace" as he ascended to the rafters from out of the titantron [though it would actually be Marty Jannetty dressed up as Al Wilson. Hey, Marty probably needs the money, after all...]

 

Dawn Marie would continue the relationship "from beyond" by way of a psychic seance specialist, probably portrayed by Charles Wright in a hybrid of his own old Papa Shango gimmick combined with the genius that was the Gary Spivey angle in 1995 WCW...

 

Torrie Wilson would then steal his skull, crystal ball, and brillo pad looking hair helmet in order to prevent Dawn from tormenting her dead father. However, stealing these magic artifacts would either:

 

A) Turn Torrie Wilson into Psychic Godfather Shango's Voodoo Ho (you know you want to see it)

 

B) Her attempts to keep and use the artifacts would be horribly botched, causing a long series of odd, inexplicable, and freakish things to happen in the WWE world. [it could be their Deus Ex Machina explanation for every stupid idea that makes it on camera and every angle/plot thread that goes unresolved. Big Show becomes world champ? Torrie did it. Booker T gets sick travelling through India? Torrie did it. Basically, she'd be on camera what Stephanie is backstage; the root of all crap.]

[Guest Choken One]

In reality? Just a little Graphic at the start of the show...and a mention during the show.

[Guest evilhomer]

Reminds me of Indecent Proposal when the lawyers put the mortality clause into the contract. AHHH, to die in the act with Dawn, if you gotta go, there's definately worse ways.

 

 

Choken has exactly what they would do, maybe with some exploitation of Torrie, showing all the wrestlers giving their condolences.

[Guest AndrewTS]

A) Turn Torrie Wilson into Psychic Godfather Shango's Voodoo Ho (you know you want to see it)

 

B) Her attempts to keep and use the artifacts would be horribly botched, causing a long series of odd, inexplicable, and freakish things to happen in the WWE world. [it could be their Deus Ex Machina explanation for every stupid idea that makes it on camera and every angle/plot thread that goes unresolved. Big Show becomes world champ? Torrie did it. Booker T gets sick travelling through India? Torrie did it. Basically, she'd be on camera what Stephanie is backstage; the root of all crap.]

A) I want to see THAT! And I HATE Torrie, even!

 

B) Naw...that'd be too clever and would make too much sense for a major WWE angle.

[Guest cynicalprofit]

They would just WCW it and never mention it again and hope the fans would just forget he was ever on the show.

[Guest Cataclysm911]

"What would happen if Al Wilson died?"

 

Dawn Marie would mourn?

[Guest Army Eye]

They would just WCW it and never mention it again and hope the fans would just forget he was ever on the show.

Err I don't think so. His daughter works there; they are not going to be that cold.

 

They'd show a picture, Al Wilson 19xx-2002, say what a good man and good father he was, etc. And Dawn Marie would be off TV for a while.

[Guest Jobber of the Week]

If Al Wilson died, they'd give Torrie time off and then move Skinny Bitch back to SmackDown and I'll have to stare at her legs and bony body instead of the much more attractive Torrie.

[Guest cynicalprofit]

Err I don't think so. His daughter works there; they are not going to be that cold.

I should have been more clear, I was refering to the angle, not the person.

 

They'd show a pic, give a date, and the show would then begin.

[Guest Youth N Asia]

He'll die on a Sunday, then on Raw the next day.

 

Spike: "You hear about Torrie's dad?"

Rico: "Yeah man, that really sucks."

Jericho: "You know what I heard?"

Hurricane: "what?"

Jericho: "I heard when they found him his ass had been severly tramatized."

Kane: *smiling, walking in* "Hey guys, what cha talking about?"

 

*The 4 share an uneasy moments*

[Guest Your Olympic Hero]

Have Torrie interrupt the marriage ceremony and start making out with Dawn Marie, and they leave together. Forget Al.

[Guest Ravenbomb]

Al Wilson died 70 years ago last September...

sad, too...he was great in The Cloud Rider...

[Guest Youth N Asia]

Have Torrie interrupt the marriage ceremony and start making out with Dawn Marie, and they leave together. Forget Al.

Cause HLA got so over last time.

 

Might have gotten over had any actually happened

[Guest Ram]

Hire Strongbad's writer and ask him to do a segment of rememberance.

[Guest HartFan86]

The last straw for me was right before he proposed:

 

Al: "I'm going to the ring"

 

I was just thinking why does this monkey-fuck get to go to the ring? He's never worked or reffed a match in his life. I shoule be able to "go to the ring" before he does.

Don't worry. He'll have his own titantron, theme song, and pyro by the end of the month

[Guest HartFan86]

They would just WCW it and never mention it again and hope the fans would just forget he was ever on the show.

I'm sorry if this is cold, but that was funny as hell.