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Guest TheBostonStrangler

SWF Storm (1/23/03)!

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

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TAPED EARLIER THIS DAY

 

The screens fades from darkness to a brightly lit office, and a well-furnished one at that. The camera pans around quickly before settling on a lone figure seated behind a large desk. Any SWF fan could instantly recognize the man even in the dark by his customary grin. Of course, the large placard on his desk that reads “COMMISSIONER” certainly can’t hurt either.

 

“Hello!” the Suicide King chirps. “Thank you for joining us for another edition of SWF Storm! And a very important show this is too, as it is the final one before Clusterfuck! This show tonight will determine who goes where and when, and in turn who will have the chance to face the World Champion at the next PPV!”

 

The King stands, going over to a large easel with picture of SWF superstars on it. Removing a pointer from his pocket he gestures from one photo to another as he speaks…

 

“And who will be the winner of that twenty person soirée? Will it be a technical master, like Danny Williams or Mak Francis? Perhaps a hardcore staple like Annie Eclectic or Michael Craven? Maybe even one of the latest and greatest batch of SJL prodigies? Anything can happen… well, almost anything can happen that is. One thing that cannot happen is that X CANNOT win. And to ensure that that wretched event does not come to pass, the person or persons who eliminate X from the Clusterfuck will receive 20,000 dollars in cash.”

 

With a loud click King collapses his pointer.

 

“But it isn’t only spite that brings me here to talk to you tonight. No, like many of you I find your average battle royal to be somewhat… well, boring. And if there’s one thing I hate it’s boring television! You would think that my superstars could motivate themselves to new heights simply by knowing that the winner of “Da Fuck,” as the are so eloquently calling it, gets a shot at the SWF World Champ! Well, to make sure that the PPV is a shining example of athleticism and wrestling acumen, I…“

 

He leans in to the camera, grinning.

 

“-the Suicide King-“

 

Lean out.

 

“am… upping the ante. Not only will the winner get a shot at the World Champ, but for the first time ever, the winner of this twenty person crime against humanity will also NAME THE STIPULATION under which that title is defended!! Eclectic wins and wants a hardcore match? Fine! Frost wins and wants a Window Pain match? Fine! Hell, maybe Satan is shining up his ice skates and Xero wins, only to demand an ice cream eating contest! FINE!!!”

 

He reconsiders. “Well, maybe that last one is a little much. But in any event I may as well be handing the winner the title on a silver platter as he (or she) will have the champ exactly where he (or she) wants him (or her, in case Magnifico is still champ).”

 

“In any event, I trust you’ll be able to see what I mean come Clusterfuck time, when all twenty superstars will be chomping at the bit to give you, the viewer, a melee of grand proportions! Thank you, and good night!”

 

The picture begins to darken as King turns, presenting his back to the camera. Fade, fade…

 

“WAIT! Nearly forgot something!”

 

The picture brightens surprisedly.

 

“The first three people eliminated will be punished. Good night!”

 

Fade to black as King giggles to himself...

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

SWF Storm! - January 23, 2003

Live from the Mobile Civic Center in Mobile, Alabama!

 

Over-The-Top-Rope Elimination Battle Royal

CIA v. Alex Zenon v. Tod deKindes v. Xero v. TNT

The Commish wants a quality Clusterfuck this year, so let’s give the kids a warm-up! And to sweeten the deal, the winner will be granted his choice of entry number in the Clusterfuck! And I swear to God that I had this idea before I saw Raw…

Rules: You go over the top rope, both feet touch the floor, you’re gone.

Send to: Grand Slam

Word Limit: 6000

 

Singles Match

X v. Perfect Bo

King does not like X. Oh no he does not! He would like X to be maimed savagely, yes he would! To this end X will wrestle his old Poundmate, Perfect Bo, and HVT is barred from ringside!! Bo’s instructions? If X can’t walk he can’t win the Clusterfuck, and if he can’t walk he certainly can’t interfere with your ass-kicking of that Wanksta Thugg.

Rules: Standard Rules, DQ/Countout in effect. No HVT.

Send to: chirs3

Word Limit: 4500

 

Singles Match

Stryke v. Hville Thugg

Stryke has been on fire the last two matches, defeating returning veterans X and Perfect Bo. Time for him to try on the angriest black man of them all! The Commish has the utmost faith in Stryke, but will that be enough to derail this locomotive? It had better be... because Thugg is just a great big pussy now, as we all know.

Rules: Standard

Send to: TheBostonStrangler

Word Limit: 5500

 

Six Man Tag Match

Judge Mental, Danny Williams, & Tom Flesher v. Annie Eclectic, Mak Francis, and El Luchador Magnifico

Special Guest Commentator: Frost

Tom booked it and King liked it, though the Commish grows a little concerned over the attitude displayed by his workers recently… to show that his is the final word, there will be a special guest commentator at ringside who might help, or he might hurt… FROST!!! As long as the good guys lose, everybody wins. You don’t think this match will end with massive run-ins, do you? J

Rules: Standard Tag, but with more people.

Send to: Suicide King

Word Limit: 6000

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

The scene fades in from black to find the Suicide King sitting on the edge of the heavy oaken desk he transports from arena to arena. It might be an extreme affectation to tote around, but he knows that the trappings of power are sometimes just as important as the power itself. He bounces a ping-pong ball in his right hand off the smooth polished surface. The slightest of grins marks the corners of his mouth and he lifts his head as he hears the sound of the door to his makeshift office open.

 

King gives a golf clap to greet the new ICTV Champion Frost as he enters the picture. He is wearing a tan jacket with brown elbow patches over a white dress shirt and khaki slacks. Heaven forbid a tie. The ICTV title is strapped around his waist and worn with the aloof detachment like one would wear any old, brown leather belt to keep their pants up.

 

“We’re making a habit of meeting like this.” King tosses off in reference to their last encounter.

 

“Let’s not,” is Frost’s curt reply.

 

King chuckles amused under his breath and continues to bounce the ping-pong ball on the table. “Nice to see you dressed up for your color commentating duties during the main event tonight. Do a good job and there could be a job waiting upon your retirement.” King catches the ball and points at Frost with that hand.

 

“I don’t think that will be anytime soon.” Frost shows no emotion, no body language. He stands like a statue knowing full well that you can never force the Gambling Man to show his cards before he is ready.

 

“We could carry on this stimulating conversation all day, but I’m sure you want to know why I called you to my office?” King leans back and runs a quick hand over his goatee while measuring the big man.

 

“Only if it gets me the hell out of here.” Frost mumbles with a flare of his nostrils.

 

“You did me a great service a couple of weeks ago against the Hville Thugg…”

 

“I did you no service,” Frost cuts him off with a flash of anger. “I took down Thugg, because I wanted to and he deserved it. If it fit your plans, congratulations.” One who didn’t know Frost better might hear that as sarcasm.

 

“It did. No matter your reasons, I appreciated it. I see you being a real help to me since I’m commissioner now and I want to help you in return. That’s why you have that title around your waist. That’s why you’re only working as a commentator tonight. And it’s why I’m also giving you this.” King spikes the ball on the desk and it nearly hits the ceiling. He catches it on the way down and holds it up for Frost to see in one crisp, clean motion. A black number twenty is prominent on its face.

 

Frost takes a step back with a look of confusion. Slowly realization dawns on him as King plays his hand. “I am giving you the last slot in the Clusterfuck.”

 

Frost’s eyes narrow and he puts a hand on King’s wrist. He lowers the arm and steps closer to the commissioner. “I don’t want to enter last and I don’t need to enter last. I’ll win the Clusterfuck by tossing everybody out on their ass, not because you allow me to slip in at the end and obliterate who’s leftover.”

 

“Ah,” King says as if a great truth has been revealed, “I see, you’d rather go in first. Eliminate everybody yourself, make a great run of it, a dominating performance. I can understand you wanting that.” King smoothly rotates the ball in his hand to show the opposite face. A bold number one adorns it to signify that King is now offering Frost the first slot in the Clusterfuck.

 

“I didn’t ask you for anything and until I do,” Frost starts in through clenched teeth, “which will most likely never happen, I don’t want you to give me anything. I EARNED this title.” He raps a hand on the shiny metal surface. “If I win the Clusterfuck, it’s because I EARNED that as well. If I come in first, if I come in last, it doesn’t matter.” Frost takes the ping-pong ball from King’s hand and throws it across his office to ricochet off the far wall. “You just draw me a number like you’re going to draw for everybody else.”

 

King stares at his empty hand, not believing the audacity of Frost for taking the ball away from him. He does not lose his cool, however, and gives the new ICTV Champ an intense stare with pursed lips. “It’s obvious that you do not trust me, so why don’t you pick your own number if getting a random one means so damn much to you.” King points to the bingo ball tumbler in the corner.

 

He hops off his desk and pulls it on its cart to the middle of the floor. He turns the handle a few brisk times to mix up the ball and then flings open the door. “Go ahead. You want to control your own destiny so much. Draw your own number.”

 

Frost never takes his eyes off of the Suicide King as he dips his hand into the tumbler. He roots around for a few seconds before pulling out a ball near the bottom. He holds the ball up to his eyes, nods his head once knowingly and then turns it around to show King.

 

“18,” the Commissioner says dryly “still pretty close to the top.”

 

“But it was a fair draw and that’s all I wanted.” Frost pitches the ball into the wastebasket next to King’s desk without diverting his stare. “If that’s all, then I’ll excuse myself.”

 

“Please do,” King waves his hand out toward the door in mock politeness.

 

King waits a few seconds to make sure that Frost is truly gone and then circles around to the back of his desk. He opens a large drawer near the bottom and pulls out a clear plastic bag filled with ping-pong balls. He tips over the tumbler and dumps the balls in into the trash. “A fair draw,” he repeats for his own ears and prepares the tumbler with the new balls. The camera zooms in on the trashcan to reveal the pile of balls, some of their faces pointing up, and every single one reading 18.

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

**Back from the revamped opening credits, Grand Slam Mark Stevens and Bobby Riley welcome us all to the action proper.**

 

Stevens: We got a packed show tonight, but we're gonna start off with a preview of Clusterfuck, Bobby!

 

Riley: That's right, we're gonna open with a five man Over The Top Rope Elimination battle royal. There will be NO pinfalls, there will be NO submissions and there will be NO one left standing at the end … but MY BOY: Tod deKindes!

 

Stevens: Nonetheless, the only way you can be eliminated in this match is by going over the top rope and onto the floor. And as a matter of fact, here's the golden voice of the SWF to tell you all about it!

 

 

Funyon: (clears throat) Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to SWF Storm! Tonight's opening contest will be an Over The Top Rope Elimination Battle Royal in which the winner will get to choose his entry number for our next spectacular, the Clusterfuck match! In order to be eliminated, a contestant must be thrown OVER the top rope, and BOTH feet must touch the floor! The match shall continue until ONE man is left standing. And now, introducing the participants …

 

**The lights quickly make way for a mix of blinding strobe lights and neon green spotlights as 'Cold' by Static X blasts from the speakers. As the XF9 logo forms itself on the screen, the entrance video of Tod's exploits appears on the Smarktron.**

 

Funyon: First; from Toronto, Ontario, Canada; weighing in at 227 lbs. He is the SOLE Surviving Member Of X Force Nine, and (quick check of the note card) …fuck it. Tod - deeeeeeeeeeeee - Kiinnn - deeeeeeeeesss!!

 

**Tod steps out from behind the curtains, as he appears to have calmed down from his somber mood from the last Smarkdown show. Back to his old irritating self, he takes a few seconds to let the front row fans in the aisle know that he got Minoriy Report for Christmas (on DVD!!), that he doesn't mindlessly stiff 20 year old kids on reality shows, that Forrest Gump is just a MOVIE, people; and that Charlie Daniels Band were nothing but a bunch of jug blowin' HACKS!! THAT gets the attention of everybody within earshot, as Tod nonchalantly slides under the bottom rope for ring entry.**

 

Stevens: Once again, Tod deKindes not endearing himself to the Mobile crowd.

 

Riley: (stifles a laugh) Yeah. Right. Do these people even know what a DVD is? They must think it's an STD given to them by their first cousin!

 

**As the Lone Niner's theme song quickly fades off, Tod rids himself of his trench coat while stretching in the ropes. He gives Funyon a brief cock-eyed look for not reading his card, but doesn't linger on that as he paces around, awaiting for the next participant.**

 

Riley: No words of wisdom from Tod??

 

Stevens: No!!

 

Riley: But it's always nice to hear from Tod before a match!!

 

Stevens: Say it ain't so, Bobby!!

 

Riley: (quickly picking up on Stevens' sarcasm) … You know I hate you, right?

 

**The lights quickly switch to red and white strobe lights, as "Trust" by Megadeth flows in from the speakers. A scant thirty seconds of drums go by, as sudden flame bursts from the stage, allowing that bald headed SOB to walk out.**

 

Funyon: Second, from Port Colborne, Ontario, Canada; weighing in 210 lbs … Xeeeeeeee - rroooooooo !!

 

**Not wasting any time like certain people, Xero takes a quick walk down the ramp and briskly steps up the apron to get into the ring. Knowing an opportunity when he sees one …Tod pounces with a vicious forearm to the side of the head!**

 

Riley: Here we go, baby!

 

Stevens: And Tod deKindes looks to be in a hurry to get this over with!

 

**As Mark Hebner and Eddy Long watch from ringside, they have no choice but to call for the bell and start the match, just as Funyon makes a mad dash for his timekeeper's table. Meanwhile, Tod stomps a nasty mudhole onto Xero in the corner and proceeds to forcefully Irish whip him out towards the opposite corner. Tod throws himself into the adjacent ropes and NAILS Xero with an acrobatic flying forearm. Just as an abbreviated version of "Secret Agent Man" fires up …**

 

Stevens: Meanwhile, we got three more people in this match!

 

Funyon: Introducing participant number three: Seeee - Aye - Eeeeeeeeeeeh!!

 

**The masked man CIA runs out from backstage and immediately charges the ring. Tod charges towards him with a clothesline attempt, which is ducked under by CIA, who fires back with a series of right hands! Irish whip to the ropes by CIA on Tod, who catches the pseudo german with a BIG press slam into a flapjack! Tod staggers up to his feet several times, but CIA quickly knocks him back down with a series of clotheslines!**

 

Stevens: CIA hasn't been in the best of moods after what took place last Friday and now he's looking to take it out on the man who's helped perpetrate it! He's opening up and letting loose on Tod deKindes right here in the early going!

 

**CIA quickly mounts his fallen foe and hammers away on him with a series of rapid fire right hands to the side of the head! Xero joins in on the attack as both men grab Tod by the hair and send him running to the ropes via an Irish whip. A dual gut shot doubles Tod over, as the other two grab a handful of hair and YANK Tod back to the mat with authority! Just as they start dropping rapid fire elbow drops on the downed Torontonian, a sudden guitar riff explodes into the arena, accompanied by a few chants of "Oy! Oy! Oy! Oy! …"**

 

Funyon: Participant number four: He is TNT; Taylor - Nicholaaaaaaaaas - Thompsooooooooon !!

 

**As Xero and CIA try to muscle Tod over the top rope, TNT briskly walks down the ramp and slides into the ring.**

 

Stevens: And now here comes TNT. What is he doing, Bobby?

 

**TNT is content to simply watch as the two struggle to eliminate his one time partner and rival …but then does a complete 180, sends out a "Eh, what the hell" shrug and advances towards CIA. He swings his mighty forearm and NAILS the Ottawan with a mighty blow to the upper back, causing him to release his grip on Tod. After peppering him with a few hard right hands, he Irish whips him towards the far side ropes, only to BLAST him with a vicious clothesline! Seeing the happenings, Xero also lets go of Tod so he can charge towards the lumbering TNT. The Explosive One ducks under a clothesline attempt by Xero, only to counter his impending rebound off the ropes with a MASSIVE big boot to the face! While Tod retreats to a corner, TNT fends off both CIA and Xero with right hands of his own.**

 

Stevens: TNT is starting off strong as he manhandles two men, but Alex Zenon still has yet to enter this match!

 

Riley: That's because he FORGOT his way to the ring!!

 

**Thompson muscles Xero over towards the ropes, in hopes of a quick elimination, but Xero tangles himself in the very same ropes to hold on. CIA puts a quick stop to that as he grabs Thompson from behind and scores with a huge belly to back suplex on the big man! He doesn't have time to celebrate or plan his next move however, as he turns around and walks RIGHT into a standing sidekick, courtesy of Tod! Meanwhile, some Tea Party starts up …**

 

Funyon: And finally, participant number five: Alex - Zeeeeeeeeeeeee - noooooooon !!

 

Stevens: Here he comes!

 

**The fans cheer at the sight of Alex Zenon power walking down the ramp while fighting out of his jacket. He slides under the bottom rope, with his crosshairs on both Tod and TNT. Charging first towards TNT, he ducks under his massive clothesline attempt, only to bounce off the ropes and score with a HUGE gamengiri right off the side of TNT's head! TNT rolls out of the ring to recuperate while Tod pounces on Zenon with a forearm to the back. Irish whip to the ropes is reversed by Zenon as he once again *scores* with a standing round house kick RIGHT to the face! Both heels converge to the outside as Zenon stands tall, playing to the crowd.**

 

Stevens: Speaking of impact, Alex Zenon is making his own as we speak!

 

**Xero and CIA exchange looks with Zenon, almost as if to say "Nice job!" to the Meadowlander. Xero offers a pat on the back of Zenon and stands next to him, ready to fight off any attackers …but Zenon PASTES him with a hard right hand! And he gives one to CIA as well!!**

 

Stevens: Wait, what is Zenon doing?!

 

Riley: It's every man for himself, Stevens!! Alex Zenon is doing nothing but following the rules of this match! And besides, who doesn't wanna nail CIA with a solid one? Even his partners!

 

**Zenon grabs a handful of CIA's hair and mask, and darts towards a set of ropes …and TOSSES HIM OUT!! … But CIA holds onto the ropes and slithers back in under the bottom rope.**

 

Stevens: When he's willing to eliminate his own partner, that just shows you how much Alex Zenon wants to win this thing! If he wins this, he gets to choose his entry number at Clusterfuck! And I'm sure a nice comfy number 20 would work to his advantage!

 

**CIA offers Zenon a hearty shove, punctuated by a "What the FUCK, man!" to express his shock and outrage. Zenon replies casually with a swing of the right hand, which is quickly ducked under by CIA, who replies with right hands of his own!**

 

Stevens: And now the two members of the Midnight Carnival are going at it!

 

Riley: The Carnies are exploding right in front of our eyes!

 

Stevens: Speaking of exploding…

 

**Tod and TNT are seen conferring at ringside, while Zenon and CIA are busy pummeling on each other. Having rolled to the outside as well, Xero simply tries to get his senses back together.**

 

Stevens: What are Tod and TNT doing, Bobby?

 

Riley: They're doing what's called Making The Best Out Of A Situation, Slammer. They're gonna team up, take out the other three men by themselves and THEN they're gonna have a go at it.

 

**Having gained the brief upper hand, Zenon grabs whatever he can on his partner, as he tries to shove him over the top rope in hopes of a quick elimination; but CIA hangs on. Meanwhile, Xero walks around ringside …only to have his path blocked by the large mass that is TNT. Xero tries to work his own deal with TNT, but he doesn't even have the time to say 'Hey' as Tod comes from behind and BLASTS him with a forearm to the back! The one time T & TNT Connection go to work on Xero with a vicious series of kicks and forearms to the ribs and back respectively. They punctuate that onslaught as they drag him up to his feet, only to forcefully send him back first and with authority into the steel ring steps with an Irish whip.**

 

Riley: Now THAT will rearrange a spine in a SECOND!

 

**Seeing the struggling Zenon in the ring, Tod decides to leave Xero in TNT's murderous hands as he slides back into the ring, eyeing his two Midnight Carnival foes …until he decides to help out Zenon and tries to shove out CIA!**

 

Riley: Hey, look at that!

 

Stevens: This is what you can expect at Clusterfuck, folks. Partners going up against one another and bizarre alliances are just two of the things you're going to see at the pay per view.

 

Riley: But with Tod helping out Zenon, it's only a matter of time until CIA goes FLYING out!

 

**That would be all well and good has Tod held onto CIA, but instead he changes gear suddenly …and thumbs Zenon in the eyes! Zenon staggers off to the center of the ring while CIA falls back to the safety of the canvas. Tod meets up with Zenon with a series of right hands to the side of the head, sending him back into a corner. He drills Zenon with another series of gut wrenching shoulder blocks to the midsection, punctuated by a series of hard back elbows to the head. Irish whip to the opposite corner by Tod, but it's reversed! As Tod takes the ride to the corner instead, Zenon charges right away with an attack but it's all for naught anyway, as Tod gets the boot up to counter. He quickly grabs Zenon by the wrist and completes his intended Irish whip, sending him hard into the corner. Tod charges with another splash of his own, but this time it's Zenon who counters as he moves! Zenon grabs Tod by the legs AND SENDS HIM OUT!!**

 

Stevens: Tod deKindes could be eliminated right there!!

 

**The crowd's cheers are however soon subdued when they notice Tod's hands firmly gripping the top strand, as he skins the cat back in. While TNT is casually beating up Xero on the outside of the ring, CIA gets back in the action as he waits for Zenon to turn around …and plant a boot in his gut! He runs off the ropes and connects with a huge swinging neckbreaker. Tod, who's already back up to his feet, springs off HIS side of the ropes and nails the downed Zenon with a BIG knee drop right on the forehead. With Zenon temporarily neutralized for now, CIA waits a few seconds …then grabs Tod, trying to throw him out!**

 

Riley: Hey what is this?! I kinda liked seeing these two beat up on Zenon!

 

Stevens: I feel like beating on YOU half of the time.

 

**Meanwhile, on the other side of the ring, Xero is being rolled in under the bottom rope by TNT. Xero tries to get his bearings back together, but he quickly finds himself stomping away on TNT as soon as HE rolls back inside the ring. Covering up as best as he can, TNT rises up to his feet, still under Xero's hard right hand assault. He grabs TNT’s wrist in hopes of yet another of many Irish whips in this match; but TNT hangs on to the ropes, and dang he ain’t going nowhere, Jethro. Again, and Thompson still ain’t moving even if Xero pulled with BOTH hands! (imagine that!) TNT switches places with the DDT King, catches him by the head and legs and sends him FLYING high overhead with a release T-Bone suplex! Xero staggers up to his feet, but Thompson quickly knocks him back down with a big time clothesline. Xero once again stumbles back up, only to fall prey to another huge striking attack from TNT, this time being his running forearm.**

 

TNT: Get up, boy!!

 

**Thompson drags up Xero by the back of the neck (because there’s no hair to grab, see) and powers him into the ropes with an Irish whip. Xero duly ducks under a clothesline and a back elbow attempt, leaps off in a cross body attempt of his own, but he’s CAUGHT! Thompson easily maneuvers him into the tombstone position, moves his arm accordingly and then PLANTS Xero with a cradle tombstone, AKA his scoop piledriver! Normally he’d get AT LEAST a solid 2 ¾ count off of that, but that rule isn’t applying tonight. He does a quick throat slash which ends in a point to the outside …**

 

Stevens: Looks as if Xero is about to head to the showers, Bobby.

 

Riley: You don’t SAY! I couldn’t have told even if we were watching the SAME MONITOR!!

 

Stevens: (picking up on Riley’s sarcasm) … ( …he decides to keep quiet on that one instead)

 

**TNT picks up Xero in a press slam and maintains him there …**

 

Stevens: And Xero is going for a ride!!

 

**Thompson casually advances towards the ropes and ready to toss out Xero like a sack of doorknobs, but Xero suddenly wiggles his legs free and falls back to safety on his feet behind TNT! He grabs a quick waist lock on the big man, shoving him towards the ropes. TNT holds on, causing Xero to do an involuntary backwards roll. Quick check on CIA and Tod …yep, CIA’s still trying to eliminate him, while Zenon is slowly getting to his feet and considering helping his fellow Carnie. Xero charges towards TNT (a mistake, I’m sure), but TNT backdrops him CLEAR OVER THE ROPES …but Xero lands on the apron. TNT times his steps properly …and NAILS Xero with a stinging big boot that sends him crashing into the guard rail!**

 

Stevens: And Xero is out of here!!

 

Riley: See ya!!

 

Funyon: Xero has been eeee – liminated!!

 

Stevens: And now it looks like Tod will be heading out as well!

 

Riley: PLEASE NO!!

 

**As Thompson rests briefly against the ropes, the crowd volume raises slightly as Tod is being gradually shoved out by CIA and Zenon. The crowd roars as they see Tod’s feet in the air, ready to hit the mat … … until Tod craftfully maneuvers his way under the bottom rope and back to safety! Crowd naturally boos that one. TNT suddenly vaults over Tod and takes control over CIA as he blasts him with a series of right hands. All while wrapping his massive hands over his Canadian throat; Thompson tries to assert his dominance as he tries to shove CIA out all while depriving him of his oxygen. Meanwhile, Tod and Zenon are back to trading right hands, with Zenon gaining the upper hand with a nasty knife edge chop to the chest. Irish whip to the ropes by Zenon, but it’s quickly reversed by Tod with a thumb to the eyes, as Zenon now takes the trip to the ropes. Zenon ducks under a sudden standing side kick attempt, and then under a leapfrog from Tod, only to try a cross body of his OWN. But you don’t try that on Tod …**

 

Tod: Aw, HELL, no!!

 

**He catches the flying Zenon, spins him around and DROPS him with the Formula For Failure! He falls on top of Zenon, yelling to any referee within earshot to make a count.**

 

Riley: Come on, referee! Count, damn it! COUNT!!

 

Stevens: There are no pinfalls, you useless inept twit!!

 

**Tod gets off from his lateral press on Zenon, only to shower him with another series of kicks to the head and ribs. He picks him up by his stringy auburn hair, only to grab him in a front facelock and throwing his arm up over his head; the dreaded vertical suplex position. He snaps off a crisp suplex, as somewhere in this sick sick world, whatever is left of the Todheads go “Hoo!”.**

 

Stevens: Alex Zenon, now undergoing the Tod Trilogy…

 

Riley: That’s one!

 

**Holding on, Tod brings Zenon back up to his feet, only to lift him up and crash him down face first with a front suplex.**

 

Riley: That, my deviant friend, is two!

 

**Third time’s a charm, as Tod lifts up Zenon once again and holds him high up …usually, he would drop him stomach first across the top rope, but this time he instead opts for a solid brainbuster!**

 

Stevens: That’s odd. Tod had the perfect opportunity to throw out Alex Zenon, but he didn’t! Case of overconfidence, maybe?

 

Riley: Not a chance, Slammer! The freak needed a little extra ass whuppin' and MY BOY Tod deKindes is just the man to provide it!

 

**Tod heads over to a random corner and hops up on the second turnbuckle. As he leaps off, he aims the point of the elbow and DRIVES it right on top of Zenon's forehead. As CIA manages an attempt to fight off his imminent elimination at the hands of TNT, Tod tries the same thing as he scrapes Zenon off the mat by the hair and then brings him over towards a set of ropes. As Zenon hangs on to prevent HIS elimination, CIA manages to nail a right hand to TNT's gut, releasing him from his impending doom. He quickly turns the tables on the Exploding One, as HE grabs TNT and tries to shove HIM out of the ring! But the ever powerful Thompson hangs on …**

 

Stevens: And there you see on two opposite sides of the ring, Tod deKindes and CIA trying to eliminate Alex Zenon and TNT respectively. These four men have been doing from good to hot lately, but there's one thing in common. One driving factor for all these men: Clusterfuck. While people like Tod deKindes have been chasing after the ICTV title, there's also the concept of winning Clusterfuck which GUARANTEES you a title shot, no matter WHO the champion is, Bobby!

 

Riley: And as we're watching a preview right here; namely guys laying around on the ropes and trying to push each other out …

 

Stevens: Bobby.

 

Riley: What, it's true! …But like I'm saying, this is what we're gonna see at Clusterfuck! So far, Alex Zenon and CIA haven't been shy about pounding on each other, and vice versa; just to name an example.

 

Stevens: But in the last few weeks, each of these four men have been on their own personal mission. As we all know by now, Tod deKindes has been trying to carve a niche for himself in the upper ranks of the SWF, as he has fervently been chasing after the ICTV title, which is currently held by Frost.

 

Riley: Hey, as much as I praise his exploits; it's gonna be a hell of a task if Tod ever wants to take that belt from him, SHOULD HE ever get his title shot.

 

Stevens: Of course we all know about the bad blood between THESE two, Tod and Frost. But of course, you also have CIA. This guy just wants to impress his fellow Carnie members and prove that he actually belongs in the group in the first place!

 

Riley: Right. Hey, the guy holds a win over Frost AND he hopes to grab hold of the tag team titles along with Mak Francis. I'm not the hugest fan of the guy, but I'd say CIA is starting to get there.

 

Stevens: And then you got the young man who recently made his return to SWF action last week, Taylor Nicholas Thompson. That guy just wants his spot back in the Magnificent Seven, Bobby!

 

Riley: Hey now, he knows where his true allies are and there's like, one guy who still kinda doesn't mind him these days, and that’s his former tag team partner Frost.

 

Stevens: These two had a COMMANDING tag title reign just a few short months ago, might I add.

 

Riley: I tell ya, if TNT can get on track, not only will he match his past success but even SURPASS it …that is if he's allowed back into the Magnificent Seven.

 

**On one side, Zenon once again wards off elimination by securing his feet on the apron and then popping Tod in the mouth with a somewhat of a roundhouse kick! Meanwhile, TNT uses his own nefarious means to get rid of the Canadian masked man that's trying to eliminate him, as he knocks him goofy with a wildly thrown back elbow to the side of the head and then blinds him with a well placed thumb to the eye. With both sets of opponents converging in opposite corner, as Tod beats on Zenon and Thompson beats on CIA. The heels give each other a quick nod and call for a double Irish whip. Both Tod and TNT confidently grab hold of their respective opponents' wrists and pull them towards the center of the ring; but they're suddenly reversed! Both CIA and Zenon switch sides with modified arm twists. Zenon catches Tod and alley oops him off his feet, while CIA does a basic whip reversal. Result: TNT catches Tod in somewhat of a powerbomb combination, staggering around for a few seconds because he's not sure of what just happened. However, CIA capitalizes as he sends a HIGH dropkick right onto the face of Tod; causing him to involuntarily take down TNT with a flying head scissors! Just a split second later, Zenon charges towards Tod and connects with a massive roundhouse kick to the gut. He quickly grabs him from behind with a rear face lock, only to rapidly swing his elbow downwards right into Tod's chest with the Turn N Burn!**

 

Stevens: And now it looks as if the Midnight Carnival are taking over control of this match!

 

Riley: Come on, Tod! Regroup! Regroup!!

 

**Zenon and CIA grab TNT, pepper him with a few right hands to neutralize, then send him to the ropes with a double Irish whip. Just as the Exploding One bounces back, he gets caught with a HUGE double flapjack that drives him face first to the mat! Thompson tries to crawl up to his feet, but the two Carnies are already bouncing off opposite sets of ropes as they SMACK Thompson in the head with a double steated dropkick! The crowd is on fire as their favorites are back in charge.**

 

Stevens: The Midnight Carnival are back on top for the time being! But listen to this crowd! They are on their feet!

 

Riley: Even right now, Slammer, if I were a Midnight Carnival member right now (and thank God I'm NOT) in that ring, I would NOT trust my fellow Carnie. One of 'em could simply turn around and stab the other in the back!

 

Stevens: That's exactly the nature of the Clusterfuck match, but for now the Carnies are standing tall!

 

**With their XF9 and wannabe-M7-again respective adversaries neutralized for now, Zenon and CIA stand back to back, awaiting to repel any threats …until they turn around and face each other… **

 

Stevens: Wait a minute now…

 

Riley: Are they gonna go at it??

 

**With a simple look, the two Carnies know that this is every man for himself …as they lock up in center ring!**

 

Riley: They ARE going at it!! It's the battle of the Carnies!!

 

**Zenon grabs a headlock on CIA, trying to cinch it in, but CIA quickly frees himself as he shoves Zenon off to the ropes. CIA drops down, allowing Zenon to hop over him on the inherent bounce off the ropes. CIA quickly gets up and leap frogs his fellow charging Carnie, but then both men collide in center ring with a double shoulder block! CIA gives him a "Do it again!!", as Zenon once again charges into the ropes. He ducks under CIA's clothesline attempt, but then the result is the same as they once again collide with a double shoulder block. Zenon shouts off a "YOU do it!!", allowing the masked man to charge the ropes himself. CIA ducks under Zenon's back elbow and round house kick attempt, only to be caught off guard with a HUGE Japanese arm drag, courtesy of Zenon. CIA scrambles up to his feet but then gets taken down with ANOTHER arm drag! And another! Third time's a charm, as CIA stays grounded and legsweeps Zenon, causing him to go down. CIA tries an elbow drop but Zenon quickly moves. Zenon tries his OWN elbow drop, but *CIA* moves. Another series of kick and sweep reversals end up with both men in the "Behold! We Are So Evenly Matched" fighting stance. All this has just taken place in the span of thirty seconds, as the crowd duly applauds.**

 

Riley: What the hell is this?! This isn't Ring Of Honor! Ccome on, beat the holy hell out of each other!!

 

**In the meantime, Tod and TNT are slowly getting back up to their feet. Apparently unaware to that detail, Zenon and CIA study each other for another lock up, as they don't see the once known T & TNT Connection sneak up on the Carnies. Zenon and CIA go to clinch in the center of the ring …but they turn around and nail them with right hands! Zenon grabs hold of Tod while CIA gets TNT, as they once again muscle them over towards the ropes!**

 

Stevens: This could be it for Tod deKindes and TNT, Bobby!

 

Riley: Aw hell no, they'll come through!

 

**With one final shove, Zenon manages to TOSS OUT TOD!! …But Tod still manages to hold onto the top rope.**

 

Stevens: That is IT for Tod deKindes, he is OUTTA HERE!!

 

Riley: Wait, look!!

 

**Mark Hebner is right next to Tod, as he holds up his index in the air, while the other points at Tod's foot which is STILL IN THE AIR!**

 

Riley: There's only ONE of Tod's feet that are touching, Slammer. He is still in this thing!!

 

**Though under the impression that he's eliminated Tod, Zenon walks over towards CIA so he can offer a hand in trying to eliminate TNT. CIA shifts position so that Zenon can get a better grab, leaving himself wide open …Meanwhile, outside the ring; Tod carefully moves his safe leg back onto the safety of the apron as he shifts back into the ring. With his hands full on TNT, Zenon doesn't see Tod crawling over from behind …lodging his right forearm right up CIA's "secret agent little men", causing the masked man to release his grip on TNT and double over in pain. Tod grabs a handful of hair, mask and tights on the Ottawan, and takes a run over to the opposite set of ropes, and finally TOSSES CIA OUT!! For good this time.**

 

Riley: Aw YEAH BABY!! Out with the Carnie trash!!

 

Funyon: CIA has been eee - liminated!!

 

Stevens: Well, we're now down to three here, Bobby. And it's not looking good for Alex Zenon.

 

Riley: I couldn't agree more…

 

**Just as CIA is declared eliminated, Tod pounces on Zenon with a solid forearm to the back. He grabs him in a rear waist lock and sends him HIGH overhead with a release german suplex! Tod quickly mounts him and fires away at him with another series of rapid fire right hands to the side of the head. Just as Tod moves off of him, TNT joins in as he comes off the ropes for extra momentum, and drops a big elbow on Zenon's forehead. The two heels take turns dropping running elbow Kaientai style, as they're now free to pummel on Zenon at will. Tod gives a signal to TNT, as he heads over to a corner, hopping up to the second turnbuckle. TNT picks up Zenon by the hair, as he maneuvers him in front of the waiting Tod and then thrusts his head into a standing head scissor.**

 

Stevens: What are they doing, Bobby?

 

Riley: Ooh, check this out. This move stems from their JL days and it was once used on one Ced Ordonez. Just to tell you how effective this move is, ol' Ced hasn't bothered to mess with these two again.

 

**As Tod stands ready on his perch of double-teaming offense, Thompson lifts up Zenon in a powerbomb position and maintains him there; allowing Tod to leap off his perch of intended violence and catches Zenon with a Hart Attack-like clothesline that PLOWS the Carnie hard into the mat while Thompson lands in a seated powerbomb!**

 

Stevens: Look at THAT!!

 

Riley: Alex Zenon is TOAST, Slammer! If he gets up it's because he's gonna be momentarily FLYING over the top rope!

 

**With Zenon down and NOT moving, TNT steps back as Tod climbs up to the ropes, no doubt with images of a flying elbow dancing in his head. TNT places the limp body of Zenon in the perfect position; allowing Tod to leap off his perch of pain from above in an awkward position, only to snap back at the last minute into a picture perfect flying elbowdrop RIGHT onto Zenon's chest!**

 

Riley: Boo and Yah, Slammer!!

 

Stevens: Alex Zenon appears to be OUT, Bobby!

 

**The temporary T & TNT Connection do their own arm test on Zenon, as both of his arms flump down lifelessly to the mat. With a firm "This is IT!" emerging from the confident grapplers, they drag up Zenon to their feet and drag him over towards a set of ropes. It looks to be the simple matter of lifting Zenon's carcass and dumping it to the floor …but Zenon gets a sudden burst of energy as he clings onto the rope as if his life depended on it!**

 

Stevens: Zenon looks to still have some left in the tank, Bobby!!

 

Riley: You GOTTA be kidding me!! You have to do EVERYTHING if you wanna kill off a Zenon!

 

**The heels try their best to muscle Zenon over the top, but desperation can be a very helpful ally. Thompson chooses to simply give up as he changes Zenon's already blurred trail of thoughts with a MASSIVE forearm to the upper back. Zenon collapses to the mat in a heap, as the other two aren't sure what to do anymore. A lightbulb suddenly goes off in TNT's head.**

 

TNT: Get 'im up!!

 

**As ordered, Tod raises up Zenon to a standing position, while TNT heads off to his own corner. He slowly climbs up the ropes, with his back to the action, sure of his shot.**

 

Stevens: Is he gonna MOONSAULT Alex Zenon?!

 

Riley: Hey man, whatever works.

 

Stevens: Yeah but, TNT doesn't have much luck with moonsaults.

 

**TNT takes a second to taunt the fans about his self-proclaimed greatness, while Tod can barely hold up Zenon. While TNT steadies himself up top, Zenon suddenly gets a regain of energy! He grabs Tod's legs into the catapult position! The crowd of course fires up, while TNT thinks the praise is for him.**

 

Riley: Taylor, WATCH OUT!!

 

**Zenon falls back, sending Tod's head flying FAST into, well, TNT's ass. The impact causes TNT to stagger forward…and FALL RIGHT OUT!!

 

Riley: NOOOO!!!!

 

Funyon: TNT has been eeeeeeeeliminated!!

 

Stevens: Down to two!!

 

**With the crowd now on their feet, Zenon wastes no time as he plows into Tod with repeated right hands! An Irish whip, followed by a HUGE spinning back kick knocks down Tod! He gives a quick throat slash of his own, signaling that this is IT!**

 

Stevens: Zenon's gonna go for the Genocide Level Event!

 

Riley: The G.L.E.!!

 

**Zenon appropriates Tod's head into a standing headscissor, a little bit close to the ropes. He lifts up Tod for his sitout Gory neckbreaker, but Tod sees the golden chance. He wraps his legs around Zenon's waist and throws himself forward, almost like in a Tarantula! As Tod holds onto the ropes as best as he can, the momentum causes Zenon to go stumbling backwards, over the top… and ONTO THE FLOOR!!**

 

Riley: HE'S GOT IT!! YEEEESSSS!!!

 

**Zenon looks up. He sees Tod rolling back inside the ring …and himself on all fours on the ringside mat, as the bell rings. He repeadetly pounds the mats in frustration, as 'Cold' starts up…**

 

Funyon: Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner: Tod - deeeeeeeeeeee - Kin - deeeeessssssss!!

 

Riley: Zenon made that ONE crucial mistake, Slammer, and it allowed Tod to fully capitalize and become YOUR WINNER of this match!

 

Stevens: Well now, it's Tod deKindes who'll get to choose his entry number for Clusterfuck. If we're lucky, he'll pick #20!!

 

**Before we go to break, we linger on Tod who's lying exhausted in the ring with his fist up, while Zenon stares longingly and menacingly at the man who's just outsmarted him, and cost him an all-important win …**

 

Stevens: Back after this!

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

Frost marches through the halls of the Mobile Civic Center. A chorus of boos from the fans out in the auditorium rise upon the sight of him. His body is rigid and his face is flushed from his exasperating meeting with the Suicide King, which was not privy to those in attendance. Lost in thought, he doesn’t notice the diminutive, yet formidable Mexican man standing in an open doorway until he speaks.

 

“Hey, mi amigo, got a minute,” El Luchadore Magnifico asks as the camera swings around to catches him leaning in the doorway. The fans erupt with cheering and ELM gives a slight smile as if he can hear them. It then pans back over to catch Frost bristling anew and stalking closer to the World Champion.

 

“What can I help you with?” Frost says curtly, radiating hatred through the social formality.

 

“I want to talk to you about the main event.”

 

“I’m not in that, perhaps you should seek out Tom Flesher.” Frost spits out the name like it was a bad taste in his mouth.

 

“You’re not wrestling in it, senor, but you are in it. You’ll be out their next to the ring at the commentator’s table,” Magnifico gestures toward the main area of the arena “while Annie Eclectic, Mak Francis and I will be battling Tom Flesher, Judge Mental and Danny Williams.” The fans pop for the name-dropping. ELM puts his hands together and points at Frost with both index fingers like a gun. “Your amigos, your stable.”

 

“My stable,” Frost jabs a thumb at his chest. “My AMIGOS might be stretching it a bit.”

 

“Still,” ELM holds up his hands for Frost to be quiet and listen “I know that you are a loyal man. If Tom Flesher wants you to interfere in the match you will, but there is one thing greater than your loyalty.” Frost and the audience wait with anticipation to hear what that might be as Magnifico takes a dramatic pause. He steps closer to Frost and pulls himself to his full height, still several inches from looking the monster Icelander in the eye. “You are an honorable man. You and I might never see eye to eye, but I know you have your own morals and your own ethics.”

 

“I’m flattered that even a dimwit like you can recognize that in me,” Frost snaps, still not seeing what Magnifico is driving at.

 

“That is one thing, perhaps the only thing, you and I have in common. We are men of honor and, because of that, I trust you if you promise me something. I want you to promise me that you will not interfere in the main event tonight.” The fans pop for ELM’s offer as Frost ponders it.

 

“Why would I promise you such a thing?” Frost asks and puts his hands on his hips to tower even further over the smaller man.

 

“Your honor, senor, your honor. What honor is there in the Magnificent 7 taking us out 4 on 3? What honor is there for you to jump somebody who has been wrestling a grueling match when you’re fresh on the outside? What honor is there for you to do Tom Flesher’s bidding when he lacks the HONOR to face me and my comprades on even terms?”

 

Frost mulls the arguments over in his mind, turning the phrases over in his brain, hearing that word “honor” echo in his skull. “You got it.” The fans roar approval. “However, if you three cheat, if you three unbalance the odds, I’m in there. If Zenon, or CIA or…anybody” Frost punches the word, leaving an important name known yet unsaid, “comes out for you guys, I’m in there.”

 

“Fair.” ELM extends his hand to seal the deal. Frost looks down at it, gives it one firm hard shake and lumbers off like he never stopped in the first place.

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

=-=-=-=-=-= Smarkdown, January 17th 2003… Stryke vs. Perfect Bo =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

 

Bo gets up at about the same time as Stryke…Bo goes for a clothesline but Stryke ducks it which causes Bo to go towards the same ropes that Thugg is at…he turns around so he can bounces off when…

 

‘WHACK’

 

A chair shot right across the back causes Bo to tippy toe forward in pain…

 

=-=-=-=-=-=-= Later that night =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

 

Guy’s warning is just a bit too late as a large figure goes flying into the scene and tackles Thugg through the blue screen and into the equipment behind it. The camera zooms in and reveals Perfect Bo wrestling with Thugg for position while the fans at ringside can be heard booing like mad. Bo and Thugg roll on the ground, each throwing a punch every now and then, some landing, some not. After a few moments of fighting, a bunch of security guards come running in and pull the two apart. They continue to throw punches at the air, however, and one guard accidentally gets hit.

 

(HVT) – YO!! What the fuck you want from me yo?!?

 

(Bo) – To die.

 

(HVT) – Yo, get the fuck off me so I can straight blast this pussy!!

 

(Bo) – Come on bitch! Bring it…

 

HVT yanks forward and actually manages to break the hold of the guards. He charges Bo, whose guards let him go so he can defend himself, and the two begin to throw wild punches and wrestle with one another once again. After a few moments, the guards separate them again…

 

(HVT) – Yo, I swear to god…you’re fuckin’ dead!

 

(Bo) – What you got Damien…what you gonna bring yo!

 

(HVT) – Yo…I ain’t fuckin’ around wit yo no more cuz…for real. Damn a world title…damn a Clusterfuck…fuck all that shit! At Clusterfuck yo…it’s me and you nigga! And I’m gonna get my revenge bitch!

 

(Bo) – Oh, it’s on playa! Time fo’ me to finish the job, and that’s real son.

 

(HVT) – You ain’t foolin’ nobody yo…everybody knows DC has always been better than bitch as NYC, and come next Sunday playa, I’m gonna prove it to everyone when I..

 

WRECK…

 

YO…

 

SHIT!!

 

With that, Thugg snatches away from the guards and leaves the area, leaving Bo fuming yet anxious to get at HVT at Clusterfuck.

 

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Later that night in the Main Event =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

 

HVT stands up and throws his hands up in victory, until he notices the large amounts of boos. He turns to see Danny and Tom back pedaling up the ramp together, and then he puts two and two together. HVT has a few choice words for Danny and Tom, as “Who We Be” blares through the speakers, before going over to check on the status of Magnifico, who hasn’t seemed to move. The unhappy crowd begins to throw things towards the stage where Tom and Danny stand, but as if that wasn’t enough, they reach riot level as…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Stevens) – PERFECT BO!!

 

…Bo pushes past Tom and Danny and runs down to the ring, steel chair in hand.

 

(Riley) – Oooo! This ain’t gonna be good.

 

(Stevens) – That’s enough! Come on…

 

HVT is kneeling over ELM when Bo slides into the ring with his chair. Tom smiles and disappears to the back as Bo jumps his feet and begins tapping the chair on the ground waiting for Thugg to stand up.

 

(Stevens) – NO! NO!

 

HVT stands up slowly, probably to get medical attention for Magnifico, but when he turns around…

 

 

WHACK!!

 

 

…he is floored by a vicious chair shot from Bo!

 

(Stevens) – NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! GODDAMMIT NO!

 

The blow sends Thugg to one knee, but…

 

 

WHACK!!

 

 

…as second chair shot topples him into a heap near where ELM still lies. Bo stands over Thugg, who lays on his stomach, and begins stomping him in the head and neck area. The fans push the security to the limit as they try to get at Bo, who adamantly calls for a microphone.

 

(Stevens) – What a sick, vile person! I can’t believe this! Thugg was just trying to check on his friend, and Bo just obliterated him with that chair!

 

(Bo) – WHAT BITCH!! GET THE FUCK UP YOU PUSSY!

 

The fans really let Bo have it.

 

(Bo) – And now yo, I finish da fuckin’ shit…right here, right now!

 

(Stevens) – OH MY GOD!! Get someone down here! Bo is going to try and break Thugg’s neck again!

 

Bo stands over Thugg’s head, raises the chair high over his head with the edge aimed down at Thugg’s neck. However, before Bo can deliver the final blow, the lights all over the arena shut off, sending a ripple of murmurs through the crowd.

 

(Riley) – What’s this?

 

Several seconds pass, and when the house lights return…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Stevens) – IT’S XSTASY!! XSTASY’S HERE!!

 

The roar of the crowd shakes the city as Bo looks towards the ramp to see who is coming, but Xstasy is already standing behind him, a look of complete seriousness on his face and his chain in his hand. Behind Bo, Xstasy starts to whirl his chain above his head, and when Bo turns about to face X, the upstart twirls the chain so that it wraps around his forearm and fist…and then…

 

 

POW!!

 

 

…he rocks Bo’s world with a brain scrambling punch!!

 

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Present time =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

 

“Welcome back to Storm as we are Live from the Mobile Civic Center in Mobile, Alabama…and the next match will be a barn burner.” Mark said, started up his commentary.

 

“Mark, I meant to ask you…who talk like that?”

 

“Like what?”

 

{Clears throat} “It’s going to be a barn burner” Riley said, trying to imitate Mark the best way possible.

 

“That’s how all the greats speak.”

 

“Like who?”

 

“Well, there’s JR, and…um…JR.”

 

“You’re sad.”

 

“Well, it doesn’t matter…all I know after seeing that clip between Bo, Thugg, X, Tom, Stryke, Danny Williams. But the beef between Thugg and Bo is something else, this is what you call a feud…hatred, personal hatred runs through their veins…I really cant wait for the PPV to see what they’re going to give us.” Mark said getting excited for this match.

 

“Yeah, now X had to get into Bo’s business…he wont be here for a long time.”

 

“What makes you say that?”

 

“Because Bo will get rid of anyone to get his hands around Thugg’s neck…and X is between them. Can you say bye bye X?”

 

“Well, lets see if Bo can handle the quickness of X.”

 

Riley shakes his head in disprovable as he comments: “Lets see if X can withstand the power of Bo.”

 

“Well, this isn’t the first time they face each other…lets see if they can bless us with another great match.”

 

“Did you sneeze or something?”

 

“No, why?”

 

“Bless you too.”

 

“What?”

 

“What?”

 

They stay quiet for a second when Blackout. “Come With Me” by Puff Daddy begins, and BRILLIANT white light pours from the arena entryway. This light projects Xstasy’s silhouette as he stands there, and then walks down. Once he reaches the ring, the light dissipates, and the ring is illuminated as he takes to the turnbuckle and displays the sign of the X. He then scales the opposite, and does the same.

 

“This bout is schedule for one fall and has a 20 minute time limit…in the ring right now, weighing in at 211 pounds hailing from Washington, DC. XXXSSSTTTAAASSSYYY!” Funyon screams out with joy of seeing the joy of X.

 

“What?”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“How the hell should I know?”

 

“Mark, stop playing games with me.”

 

“What?”

 

“What?”

 

“Riley, shut the hell up.”

 

“What!?”

 

X ties his hair back right before the lights dim into a dark blue type color with a fire type reddish color hovering over the darkness. The Tron awakens with the words. "Wait is over" as it quickly juggles with scenes of Bo's greatest moments and victories. As a loud voice echoes around the arena stating "Damn Homie, in High school you was man Homie...what the fuck happen you."

 

“And his opponent, hailing from the Bronx in New York City…weighing in at 285 pounds…PPPEEERRRFFFEEECCCTTT BBBOOOO!!!”

 

The song "Wanksta" by 50 cent starts to as Bo slowly comes out from behind the curtains into a chorus of boos. Bo has his head down but he slowly raises it up to see the crowd as they boo him with no remorse. Bo looks around with a sly smirk on his lips as he cracks his neck. He slowly descends himself down the ramp and stops right in the middle of the ramp. He looks to his left and to his right, he then raises both his hands exposing his middle and index fingers crossed together as his pinky and thumb sticks out leaving the ring finger curled up in his palms. As both arms reaches it peaks, two red pyros blast from the ground into the air as the Tron changes images as two words are implanted on the screen that says "THUG LIFE". Xstasy waits patiently for the man that he knows pretty well, Da pound was the group they know each other from as friends, and broke up as enemies. Bo reaches the ring and slides right under the bottom rope never taking his eyes off of X.

 

Mark adjusted his seat to see the match better as he says: “Let me get comfortable so I can enjoy this match.”

 

“Yes, I can’t wait to see Bo teach X a lesson. X should just mind his business.”

 

Bo gets to his feet…walks directly towards X and just spit right on his face. The crowd made an ‘ooooo’ sound as Bo takes a step back. The action that Bo took made X fume with anger as he looks at the referee to start the match. The referee signals for the start of the match.

 

‘Ding, Ding, Ding’

 

They circle around the ring for a few seconds before X goes to Bo…this causes the Hardcore god to back peddle towards the ring and stick his head between the top and middle rope as X was about 4 inches away from Bo…ready to strike. Bo dictates the referee to get X away from him…the referee pulls X away letting Bo to get his head back in the ring. Bo cracks his neck before moving away from his challenger, X follows like a hunter as he gets closer to Bo…they are about to lock up when Bo attempts a kick to the gut, but X saw it coming and grabs the foot. He starts to pull Bo making the hardcore god wobble a bit and swinging wild to see if he can connect with a lucky shot. X smiles and twirls Bo around, he does a 360 and attempts a clothesline but X saw it coming and ducks it. Bo stumbles forward…and when he turned around to face X, the first connection causes Bo to drop faster than a fat man that sat down too fast with a back kick to the face (Tajiri Style).

 

“I could say that Tajiri is the best Martial Artist in the WF…there’s no one that could utilize him into their style of fighting…not even Bo.” Mark said, going against Bo.

 

“Regardless of what you say, Bo is the type of person that could make a match as ugly as hell and still put a great show…a show of skills and determination, and he could turn anybody into what he wants them to be. You should know, you went against him a few times.”

 

“And who came out on top? That’s all I have to say about that.”

 

X quickly goes to the hardcore one and begins to kick him down with anger…after about three kicks, he looks down at Bo and spits on him for good measure. He steps back and waits for Bo to get up…Bo looks at him as he wipes the saliva that was stuck right on Bo’s forehead. He uses the ropes to help him up; he’s fuming as he commences to sidesteps around the ring as X just stares at him with intent to kill. Bo gets closer to X and that’s when they lock up…Bo is using his power to drive X towards the corner. When X’s back touches the corner the referee goes to them and start counting the release five count.

 

‘One’

 

‘Two’

 

X raises his hands to show the referee that he’s not holding him down.

 

‘Three’

 

‘Four’

 

Bo slowly raises his hands up to show the referee that he no longer has X pinned in the corner…Bo takes a step back and throws a sneaky right hand but X saw that a mile away as he blocks it and connects Bo with a right hand of his own. A kick to the thigh, a punch to the face, another kick to the other thigh, a kick to the rib and this attack is driving Bo back with a poor attempt of blockage from Bo. X takes another step back and trips Bo down with a side sweep…X gets up, turns around and hits a standing Moonsault right on Bo. X quickly reaches for the leg to attempt a pin and a quick win. The referee goes towards Bo’s shoulders and begins to pound on the mat while looking at Bo’s shoulder.

 

‘One’

 

‘Two’

 

Bo kicks out easily

 

Riley makes a noise after seeing the early cover done by X…this causes Mark to look at him, Riley looks back at Mark and said: “No comment.”

 

X gets up and waits for Bo to get up…X has a face of pure hatred as Bo gets to one knee. Once Bo gets to both his feet X goes to him and gives him a chop to the chest…another chop but this one is a Ridgehand Chop which causes the crowd to go ‘Woooo’. Bo’s back touches the ropes and this is the time that X hits Bo with the Upstart Slap, which elevated Bo over the top rope and land outside. X waves Bo to get back in as the crowd screams with joy as they see Bo crawling away from this man, the man that is known as X.

 

“What? You don’t have anything to say?” Mark asked Riley, throwing the situation in his face.

 

“No comment.”

 

Bo gets up and walks towards the announce table…he sees the bell ringer there; he grabs him and throws him on the floor leaving the chair right into Bo’s grasp. Bo grabs the chair and folds it up…Bo looks up and sees X snitching to the referee about Bo having the chair with him…he quickly runs towards the ring and slides in but X shoves the referee out of the way and begins to kick Bo right on the back. The chair is right under Bo’s body as he hides it from the referee. X grabs Bo and helps him to his feet; he grabs Bo by his arm and whips him towards the ropes…Bo bounces off and sees X bending over so early. Bo hits a forearm shot to the back of X and then puts him between his legs in a standing head scissor position. Bo wraps his arms around X’s waist in attempt for a powerbomb. X fights away the powerbomb attempt and backbody toss Bo over. Bo scrambles towards the chair that was still by the ropes…Bo grabs the chair and sneakily gets to his feet. X goes to him and grabs his shoulder to twirl him around…once Bo twirls around he strikes X in the gut, which makes X double over. The referee haven’t seen it yet as Bo raises the chair way up in the air and viciously swings it down right on X’s head and knocks him to the mat.

 

“Whoa, that’s not right…aren’t they going to disqualify him?” Mark screams in disgust.

 

The referee saw what happen and calls for the bell.

 

‘Ding, Ding, Ding.”

 

Funyon picks up a mike from the outside and said: “And the winner of this match via disqualification…XXXSSSTTTAAASSSYYY”

 

The referee looks at Bo and told him to leave the ring and that he’s disqualified…Bo looks at him in a weird way and then drops him with a chair shot.

 

“Bo is going bezerk.” Mark said.

 

Riley just smiles and said: “No comment.”

 

Bo goes towards X again and looks down with a sick smile on his face…he raises the chair up in the air and swings it down right on his back. He goes towards the ropes and demands for a mike…he puts the mike towards his lips and said:

 

“You should of mind your business X.” Another chair shot to the legs.

 

“This isn’t between you…this has nothing to do with you.”

 

Another shot to the legs of X.

 

“Who the fuck gave you the permission to interfere in my situation with Damien? Who the fuck gave you the right?!?”

 

Bo swings the chair again towards X’s legs.

 

“You know what’s the problem? You stickin your nose where it doesn’t belong causes people to lash out on you…you put your nose into my business…I’m lashin out on you.” Bo drops the mike and became to do damage on X’s legs.

 

“Stop this…someone stop this.” Mark screams

 

“No comment.” Riley said while he chuckles.

 

Another chair shot to the legs of X, as there’s some referees running down the ramp, they slide in and get knocked down with their name written on the chair. After about 2 referees get knocked out, Bo put his attention back to X and continues to whack on his legs and that’s when the crowd jump up for joy as the big man makes his way down the ramp. Bo looks up and smiles as he leaves the ring and goes towards the crowd. Thugg slides in the ring and checks on X…the hardcore god makes his way up the audience.

 

“This is not right…and I can’t wait for later tonight…what’s going to happen?” Mark said.

 

“No comment.”

 

“What ever.”

 

“No comment.”

 

“Why don’t you have any comment Riley?”

 

“Because…what I have to say isn’t going to make you feel good…hence, no comment.”

 

“Whatever…stay tune for the next match.”

 

“No comment.” Riley said with a huge smile on his face.

 

Fades out.

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

The scene fades in to find the Superior One Tom Flesher sitting on a plush, black leather couch. Judge Mental and Danny Williams sit in chairs angled toward their leader, hanging on his every word. The fans out in the arena boo their very existence. They are all in their wrestling togs and focused on forming strategy for the upcoming six-man tag team main event.

 

“We keep Annie in for as long as…” Flesher looks up and stops in mid-sentence.

 

Frost walks into frame and gives the audience a big reason to continue their jeering. Flesher stands up and steps between Mental and Williams to slide in front of his supposed top lieutenant.

 

“Nice of you to finally join us.” Flesher bites off.

 

“I didn’t know that you sent a memo out requesting me to be here.” Frost snaps in standing toe to toe with the Superior One.

 

“I shouldn’t need to. You know that all of us come together during the show. Stable unity,” Flesher cups his hands together to signify this “and that will become even more important once Ejiro and Fugue are bumped at Clusterfuck.” Mild roars of those in the audience who follow the SWF’s feeder league accompany those two names.

 

Frost looks down at Flesher’s hands then lifts his head to meet his eyes. “That’s something I can get behind.”

 

Flesher shakes his head, a little taken aback by Frost’s response. “Well…uh…good to hear then. Hopefully winning that pretty title around your waist,” Tom puts a finger on the ICTV belt that once belonged to him “has put you back on our page.”

 

“I’ve always been on the Magnificent 7’s page.” Frost makes sure to hit the stable name in saying that he’s on its page, but not so much with Tom Flesher’s personal agenda.

 

“Good,” Flesher smiles and gestures for Frost to pull up a chair. “Having you at ringside will be a real plus then. I was thinking about seven or eight minutes in, we’ll distract the referee and you can blindside the dorks on the apron while Danny…” Flesher looks back toward Williams and jerks a thumb in his direction.

 

“No.” Frost passes his hands over each other and shakes his head like an umpire calling a man out.

 

Tom whips his head back around, surprised at being cutoff. “What do you mean, no?”

 

“I’m out there to be a color commentator, not to take part in the match. It wouldn’t be right. All you guys,” Frost points at Danny and Judge as well as Flesher “always talk about ‘real wrestling’ and being ‘true to the sport.’ Where does having me cheat for you come into that?”

 

Williams stands up and knocks his chair back. Mental simply looks up, knowing when to just shut up and listen. Flesher puts a hand on Danny’s chest to keep him in check. He then places his other hand on the collar of Frost’s jacket and runs it down the lapel.

 

“Put on a clean coat and you think you’re Tom Brokaw all of a sudden. Wrestling is about winning. Mat based, highflying, pure garbage; it’s doing what you can to win. The Magnificent 7 is a stable of winners and it takes all of us to do that.”

 

Now it is Frost’s turn to be taken aback. “I want you guys to win out there tonight more than anybody. If the Carnival tries to stack the deck, have their other buddies run in, I’ve got your back” he jabs a thumb to his chest.

 

“I can live with that.” Judge puts in. Everyone looks at him and Frost gives a slight nod f thanks for the confidence. Flesher takes a deep breath and shakes his head. “Fine, but if anything goes down you better be in their five minutes beforehand.”

 

“You’re going to let him get away with this sh*t!” Williams screams and the fans pop for the bleeped swearing.

 

He steps in front of Flesher and Tom lets him go. An observant viewer would catch him trying to hide a smirk as Williams lays into Frost.

 

“I’ll do this, but I won’t do that. I’ll be over here while you go over there.” Williams points off in the distance. “Come Clusterfuck, I think me, Judge and the n00bs should be watching our back because of you more than the damn Midnight Carnival or anyone else.”

 

“Is that what you’re worried about?” Frost yells “You’re bitching at me when you’re already looking past tonight for the Clusterfuck? I’ll tell you one thing, face,” Frost spits on the floor and turns back toward Danny “I put you on the job train on Lockdown to win this title,” he points to his belt “and I’ll do it again at the Clusterfuck if I have to.”

 

Williams pulls himself to his full height and bumps chests with Frost, neither man giving an inch. “I’ll tell you on thing, face,” Danny spits in the same spot Frost did and then locks eyes with him once more “if I have an opportunity to dump you in the Clusterfuck, I’m not going to. I’m going to save your ass for last.”

 

“I like the sound of that actually. I think I’ll do the same. You’ve got a deal!” Frost holds out his hand for the second time tonight and for the second time makes the tersest of handshakes. However, Williams holds onto the giant mitt and the two men strain against each other. The camera zooms in on the dead bolted hands and fades to black.

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

Storm returns to a freeze-frame where HVT appears to be in the process of walking down the hall backstage. The scene starts and HVT starts stomping down the hall, murmuring under his breath.

 

(Stevens) – Welcome back to Storm, and this is what took place while we were at the break.

 

Thugg stomps towards an opening, where Jim Phelps stands his post. HVT approaches…

 

(HVT) – Yo, Jim…you seen Bo? I ain’t waitin’ for no damn Clusterf-*BEEP*…I gotta put dat *BEEP* down now yo!

 

(Jim) – Not since earlier…sorry.

 

(HVT) - *BEEP* Yo, I gotta find him tonight bro…I swear to god yo…he’s a dead man if I find him!

 

Just as Thugg finishes that statement, Ben Hardy runs up and grabs Thugg by the shoulder, which causes the angry black man to spin around and nearly behead Hardy with a punch. Hardy cringes, thinking he’s going to be hit, but then relaxes when he realizes that Thugg has stopped mid-swing.

 

(HVT) – What yo?!?

 

(Hardy) – Thugg…Thugg…what are you doing?

 

(HVT) – About to find Bo and wreck his *BEEP*. Mind yo damn business yo, fo’ you get some too.

 

(Hardy) – But…but…but Thugg. You have a match…you got like 30 seconds before you go on man.

 

(HVT) - *BEEP* Son of a *BEEP*! I don’t care about that damn match yo…I just want Bo, and I want him now!

 

(Hardy) – I know…I know…there’s nothing I can do. Styrke’s already on his way out there, and they need you at the curtain in like 25 seconds!

 

(HVT) – Goddammit! I’m gonna have to make this quick…Yo, Jim…if you see dat *BEEP* Bo, you tell him I’m lookin’ for him, and I’ll be back in like 3 minutes yo.

 

(Jim) – Sure thing Thugg.

 

(Hardy) – Let’s go…

 

(HVT) – Get outta my way Hardy!

 

Thugg shoves Hardy away and goes storming off down the hall…

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Back live at ringside, the camera sits on the entrance ramp as the commentators talk about the previous footage.

 

(Stevens) – Wow. Looks like Thugg is a bit more angry than we’ve seen him recently.

 

(Riley) – Wouldn’t you be mad if you knew that Bo was going to end your career…again.

 

(Stevens) – That remains to be seen, but still…I haven’t seen Thugg this angry since before he retired. His face looks like he was ready to explode.

 

(Riley) – Yeah…whatever. Thugg is just a big teddy bear now…he wouldn’t hurt a fly.

 

(Stevens) – I will say that he’s a different guy than he was before he retired, but if his state of mind is the way I think it is, Stryke could be in for a long night.

 

(Riley) – Hey, nice segway…

 

“Points of Authority” by Linkin Park hits the speakers, causing the fans to get on their feet and cheer, and they cheer slightly louder as Stryke steps out onto the stage while orange and white pyro shoots up on either side of him.

 

(Stevens) – Ha…yeah, I know…thanks. Thugg is taking on Stryke here in a moment, and Stryke is on such a run recently, it’s amazing. Since making his return, he has defeated perennial main eventers Xstasy and Perfect Bo!

 

Stryke starts slowly down the ramp…

 

(Funyon) – The following match is scheduled for ONE fall! Introducing first…from Sydney, Austrailia and weighing in at 218 pounds…STRYYYYYYYYYYYYYKKKKKKEEEE!!

 

(Riley) - What a huge win this will be for Stryke…beating Thugg will put a stamp on this run he’s been on.

 

(Stevens) – That’s absolutely right Bobby…but I don’t know…Thugg looks real angry, so…I don’t know. But if anyone could take down the giant, it’s definitely Stryke. I mean, he doesn’t care about history or what people have done in their careers…he just beats them! Wins over Xstasy and Bo are huge…but damn, a win over Thugg would almost certainly thrust him into the lime light!

 

As Stryke slides into the ring and the cheers die down, the lights in the arena flicker and shut off…

 

“Muwhahahaha!!”

 

An electric guitar pounds the speakers and the fans leap up and scream their voice hoarse…

 

“They don’t know.”

“Who we be.”

 

“They don’t know.”

“Who we be.”

 

“What they don’t know is…”

 

 

BOOM!!

 

An explosion on the stage leaves a wall of fire in its wake, and several nearby fans holding their ears. While the remaining fans cheer their heads off and “Who We Be” by DMX hitting the speakers hard, the Hville Thugg steps out onto the stage, he head covered by his black towel.

 

(Stevens) – Speaking of Thugg…here comes the angry black man now, and boy is he in a foul mood!

 

(Funyon) – And his opponent…from Washington, DC and weighing in at 386 pounds…THE H-VIIIIILLLLLLLEEEEEE THUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGG!!

 

HVT tosses his towel into the crowd, making some 9 year old white boy that looks like Eminem, very happy. Thugg’s face screams of an annoyed rage as he steps over to the apron. Inside the ring, Styke paces nervously the ring near the far side while Thugg pulls himself up to the apron and steps over the top rope into the ring.

 

(Stevens) - Would ya look at Stryke…he looks like a deer caught I the headlights. I think Thugg is much larger than he thought…

 

HVT stands firm by the near ropes and he locks eyes with Stryke across the ring. The music fades out and the fans settle…

 

DING DING DING

 

…and Thugg starts to move quickly and angrily towards Stryke, who stands near the far ropes looking around.

 

(Riley) – Somebody better tell Stryke to do SOMETHING, or he’s going to be toast.

 

Thugg approaches and Stryke instinctively throws a hard right that lands square against Thugg’s chin. Thugg’s head snaps to the left, and then quickly back to stare at Stryke, who kind of quivers at Thugg’s absorbing his punch. Stryke, a little determined, throws out a second punch that also lands, but once again, Thugg absorbs the punch, and glares at Stryke.

 

(Stevens) – Uh oh…

 

Stryke throws one more punch, but before it can even reach Thugg…

 

 

SMACK!

 

 

…Thugg slaps on a one handed choke that sends Styrke’s arms flailing.

 

(Riley) – Holy crap!

 

(Stevens) – My Lord!! Just like that?!? This early in the match?!? If Thugg hits this, this might be the shortest match in the history of the SWF!

 

Thugg screams something at Stryke, who can’t seem to break Thugg’s grasp, and then lifts the Aussie up off his feet. However, once Stryke is in the air, he wiggles out of Thugg’s grasp and slides down behind him.

 

(Stevens) – Whew! I seriously thought this match was about to be over with…

 

Stryke, in one of the bonehead moves of the century, waits for Thugg to turn around and punches the giant, again! For his efforts, Stryke is rewarded with the same result as Thugg simply takes the blow, and once the blow has been absorbed…

 

 

SMACK!

 

 

…Thugg locks on the one-handed choke again!!!

 

(Stevens) – Whoa!! He’s got it locked in again! Thugg really IS going for the quick win here!

 

This time, Thugg lifts Styrke up with one arm, spins in a single circle, and then brings him down hard to the canvas with a Spinning Choke Slam!

 

(Stevens) – UNTAMED!! UNTAMED!! OH MY GOD…THUGG JUST HIT THE UNTAMED WITHIN THE FIRST 5 MINUTES OF THIS MATCH!!

 

(Riley) – Oh my god! Is it over already??

 

Thugg stands over Stryke, who lays sprawled in the center of the ring, with spit spewing from his mouth as he lets go a sort of enraged, primal scream. Then, suddenly, having put Stryke down, Thugg turns towards the ramp and screams out…

 

“BO!!! I’M COMING FOR YOU!”

 

(Riley) – What the hell…? Where is he going??

 

(Stevens) – It looks like he’s leaving! He’s leaving to go after Perfect Bo!

 

(Riley) – But he can’t leave now! He hasn’t finished the match!

 

The fans lose their ability to scream, and instead fall to a confused silence as Thugg dives out of the ring, ramp-side, and starts to storm up the ramp. The referee runs over to the near ropes and calls out to Thugg as he leaves…

 

“Thugg!! Get your ass back here!! You have to finish!!”

 

(Stevens) – YEAH! Thugg…this is stupid! Come back and finish the match!

 

Thugg turns as he gets to the ramp, and yells back to the referee…

 

(HVT) – Count him down yo…I’m out. BO!!!

 

Thugg continues to scream out the name of his adversary and starts back up the ramp.

 

“I can’t! You’re out of the ring! I’m going to have to count you out! ONE!”

 

Thugg shrugs and gives the finger, as if to say, “I don’t care,” and the fans actually start to get annoyed. The fans start to boo…

 

(Riley) – I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like this before…

 

“TWO!”

 

(Stevens) – This is certainly an SWF first…at least I think it is.

 

…and start a “COME BACK THUGG” chant that HVT tries really hard to ignore, as the referee takes an even more serious tone to his voice.

 

“THREE!”

 

After three, Thugg stops in his tracks, turns around, gives a very annoyed look, and screams…

 

“FUCK!!!”

 

…before stomping back towards the ring.

 

(Stevens) – Oooo! Oooo! Looks like he’s coming back!

 

(Riley) – Well, woopdiddydoda.

 

Satisfied, the referee stops his count and the fans start to cheer Thugg’s return while he slides back into the ring. As Thugg slides in, Stryke stirs and gets to all fours, but Thugg, seemingly determined, yanks him up faster than he’d like to go.

 

(Stevens) – I seriously thought he was going to leave to go after Bo, but it’s good to see that Thugg’s back and actually cares about this match.

 

Both announcers seem to be unaware of what Thugg is doing as he whips the still stunned Stryke to the far ropes, and when Stryke bounces back, Thugg presses him over his head, opening up a sea of flashbulbs.

 

(Stevens) – Or maybe he’s still going to try and end this now so he can go after Bo! Stryke’s going for a ride……LAST STAAAAAANNNNNNDDDDD…

 

 

(Riley) - …NO!! Stryke slides off to the back!

 

Before Thugg can drive Stryke to the canvas, the Aussie slides out of Thugg’s grasp and drops down behind him. Thugg turns around, but is quickly grabbed at the top of the head by Stryke, who drops down to his knees, slamming Thugg’s chin off the top of his head.

 

(Stevens) – Stryke with the Jawbreaker…

 

HVT bounces up and begins staggering about holding his chin. Stryke, sensing opportunity, moves towards the dazed Thugg and starts to hammer him with the previously ineffective right hands. The punches drive Thugg back towards the far ropes, and the crowd gets slightly behind the underdog Stryke, giving him a decent pop.

 

(Riley) – Talk about a man living in fear…Bo isn’t even down here, and Thugg was still distracted by him!

 

(Stevens) – That does seem to be the case Bobby, although I don’t think it’s fear. Thugg’s desire to end this match quickly so he can go after Bo seems to have gotten him into trouble here…

 

Once Thugg’s back is against the far ropes, Stryke attempts to whip the big man, but like so many others, Thugg reverses the whip and sends Stryke to the near ropes. HVT, still trying to land that big blow, raises his foot upon Stryke’s return, but the Aussie ducks under the Big Boot and passes by Thugg. Thugg’s slow reaction time in turning around allows Stryke to leap up to the top rope (in the middle, not the turnbuckle), and leap backwards into the air as in a Moonsault. The fans cheer the high-flying acrobatics as Thugg turns around, only to have his neck grasped and his face planted on the canvas as Stryke scores with the Reverse DDT!!

 

(Stevens) – HOLY COW!! What an acrobatic move from Stryke!! A Moonsault into a Reverse DDT…AND STRYKE WITH THE COVER!!

 

ONE!!

 

(Stevens) – This could be it right…NO! Thugg just throws the Aussie off!!

 

The fans sigh as Stryke goes flying into the air and back down to the canvas from Thugg throwing him off the pin.

 

(Stevens) – What power from Thugg…Styrke’s gonna have to really wear him down a lot more if he hopes to get the 1-2-3.

 

Both men get to their feet quickly, Stryke a little more slowly having taken that Untamed earlier on. The fans get settled in as Stryke fires a right hand that is blocked by Thugg, who fires one of his own that drops the Australian superstar. Stryke jumps back to his feet, only to be floored again by another Thugg right hand. And, despite the warning about closed fists from the referee, Thugg drops the rising Stryke one last time with another hard punch.

 

(Stevens) – Thugg starting to take control here. Bobby, what do you think Stryke can do here to stifle Thugg’s power and win this match?

 

(Riley) – It’s gonna be tough, I can certainly tell you that. It think he has to score with a couple of his high impact moves, and keep the match moving quickly. Thugg has real problems keeping up with a fast paced match.

 

Thugg lifts Stryke to his feet and thrusts him into a front face lock. The fans cheer and take photos as Thugg lifts Stryke up for a Suplex, but holds him upside-down for several seconds before dropping him back first to the canvas…BAM!!

 

(Stevens) – Thugg with the Stalling Suplex there…and you’re right Bobby. Stryke needs to speed things up and land…wait…Thugg with the cover!!

 

ONE!!

 

 

 

 

 

(Stevens) – This could be it right here!

 

TWO!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TH…

 

(Stevens) - …NO! Stryke gets his shoulder up. Like I was saying…Stryke will need to land one of those daredevil moves of his if he wants to get back in this match.

 

Thugg gets to his feet and drags Stryke up beside him. Thugg then grabs him around the waist, pulls him up, and drops him back first to the canvas with a Sidewalk Slam!

 

(Riley) – Very much so, but if you look at things now, Stryke has a long way to go, and he really needs to be looking for a big counter of some king to slow down Thugg’s momentum.

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO…

 

(Stevens) – NO! Stryke gets his shoulder up again. Hmmmm…maybe it’s not so much a methodical dissection on Thugg’s part, but maybe he’s still trying to end this match with one more.

 

(Riley) – That could be dangerous for the big man, because like I was saying, Stryke could hit one of those big counters and get right back in this match.

 

Thugg kneels, but this time leaves Stryke on the ground, and Thugg mounts him and begins to deliver heavy blows to Stryke’s head, lifting the Aussie’s head for each blow. As Thugg grabs Stryke’s head, and then punches it back down, the referee comes over and begins to warn Thugg about his closed fists, which then leads to his five-count, forcing Thugg to cease his assault and arise to his feet once more.

 

(Stevens) – Referee Eddy Long warning Thugg about those fists of his, but that’s only a slight distraction as he goes back on the offensive now.

 

Thugg lifts the near lifeless Stryke up to his wobbly legs, but Stryke, looking to make something happen, breaks Thugg’s grip and lands a hard right that kind of shakes the big man.

 

(Stevens) – Here comes the Aussie now!!!

 

Another right hand by Stryke gets the crowd on its feet to cheer the underdog, but they are quickly silenced by Thugg, who drives his thigh into Stryke’s stomach before the next blow can come.

 

(Riley) – Right idea for Stryke, but he’s gotta think bigger I think.

 

(Stevens) – You may be right here, but at least he’s kind of winning these fans over here tonight. I think they’re getting behind the underdog, and would really like to see him topple the giant here tonight, even though Thugg is also a fan-favorite.

 

Stryke doubles over from the blow, and Thugg leads him by the head to the far left corner, where he proceeds to bounce Stryke’s head repeatedly off the top turnbuckle. Thugg backs Stryke out of the corner, and then presses the Aussie over his head…before dropping him face first onto the same turnbuckle!!

 

(Stevens) – Ooooo! That’s gotta hurt…

 

(Riley) – Just think, it’ll give him a great excuse to get plastic surgery on his face. It was pretty hideous to begin with so…

 

(Stevens) – That’s not very nice Bobby…

 

(Riley) – I’m sorry, you must have mistaken me for someone who gives a rat’s ass.

 

(Stevens) – Touché.

 

Stryke’s head bounces off the turnbuckle, forcing his feet to the canvas, and as a result, Stryke staggers about for a very brief moment before Thugg locks him up into a Full Nelson. Thugg lifts Stryke off the canvas, maintaining his hold, and then drops to his rear, slamming Stryke down ass-first with a Full Nelson Drop!!

 

(Stevens) – There’s that hard Full Nelson Drop…

 

Unfortunately for Stryke, Thugg doesn’t let go of the Full Nelson, but instead, gets back to his feet, dragging Stryke with him. Still with the Full Nelson hold applied, Thugg lifts Stryke again, and sits out once more, bringing Stryke down with another Full Nelson Drop!

 

(Riley) …and another…

 

Thugg gets up once more, with the hold still applied, and scores with yet another Full Nelson Drop!!

 

(Stevens) - …AND ANOTHER…HOLY COW!

 

The fans actually start to enjoy the feet of strength as Stryke’s eyes begin to roll back in his head and Thugg stands up once more, still holding onto the Full Nelson. However, this time, Thugg lifts Stryke, and just throws his limp body to the ground hard with a Front Press Slam!

 

(Stevens) – What power from Thugg!! I could feel the ring shake after that last one…OH! THUGG FOR THE WIN RIGHT HERE…

 

ONE…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO…

 

 

 

 

 

THREE…

 

 

 

 

(Stevens) – NO!! Stryke barely gets his shoulder up at the absolute last second! By gawd…how did he kick out from that series of Front Press Drops and Slams?? What heart Stryke has…

 

(Riley) – That’s mighty impressive for an Aussie…you probably would have just laid down and died, eh Mark?

 

The referee jumps up with 2 fingers in the air, indicating that the match must continue, and Thugg stares at him in an annoyed manner. Thugg slaps the mat with his hand and gets to his feet, after which he pulls the near lifeless Stryke up as well.

 

(Stevens) – Thugg is in firm control here…

 

(Riley) – Firm control? He’s freaking dominating Stryke right now, and it’s only a matter of time now.

 

Thugg whips Stryke to the near ropes, and for some reason, Stryke remains on the ropes, his arms spread out as if he’s awaiting the next punishing blow from Thugg. Thugg takes a running start towards Stryke, looking for a clothesline, but in a desperate maneuver, Stryke falls to the mat, pulling the top rope down with him, and Thugg goes tumbling over the top and out to the floor below!

 

(Stevens) – Oh, but wait! Mistake by Thugg…here’s Stryke’s chance!

 

The fans actually begin to pop for Stryke as he stands on his wobbly legs. On the outside, Thugg gets to his feet, but Stryke grabs the top rope and slingshots himself over. The fans cheer the death-defying feet as Stryke turns his body perpendicular to Thugg’s, but when he comes into contact with Thugg’s chest, the big man manages to catch him against his body, and the fans let out a sigh.

 

(Stevens) – Damn! Thugg’s ready for everything Stryke’s got, catching him in mid air like that!

 

(Riley) – Styrke was looking for that Cross Body, but Thugg was ready for it, and being as fresh as he is, he just catches him with ease.

 

Thugg stands with Stryke for a moment, before launching himself backwards and throwing Stryke overhead with a Fallaway Slam!!

 

(Stevens) – Fallaway Slam for Thugg…on the outside!! Stryke is in real big trouble now, and you’ve gotta wonder how much he’s got left in his tank to make a serious comeback here.

 

Inside the ring, the referee pleads with Thugg to bring the action back in the ring, but Thugg goes suddenly deaf as he lifts the deadened body of Stryke, and…

 

CLANG!!

 

…throws him back first into the steel steps, dislodging the top step from its base.

 

(Stevens) – My Lord!! What an impact! Stryke’s back may be broken in two!!

 

The referee starts his ten-count, as HVT grabs Stryke by his short brown hair and lifts him to his feet. With Stryke’s legs barely underneath him, HVT throws him back first into the apron, and then begins landing scores of punches to the side of Styke’s head. Thugg rears back his large paw, and…

 

SLAP!!

 

“Oooo!”

 

…lands a hard open-handed slap to Stryke’s chest!

 

(Stevens) – And now Thugg is landing those patented open-handed slaps that, even from here, make my skin crawl.

 

SLAP!!

 

“Oooo!”

 

Stryke cringes in pain as Thugg lands his huge slaps against his chest, and while Stryke is holding his chest after the final slap, Thugg goes over and grabs the top of the stairs that had become dislodged.

 

(Riley) – Mark…look!

 

(Stevens) – Oh crap! Thugg is going to try and really end this now. He’s got those steel steps, and if I were Stryke, I’d just run now.

 

While the referee pleads with Thugg to put the steps down, effectively breaking his own 10-count, Thugg turns back to Stryke with the steps raised…

 

CLANG!

 

…but Stryke was waiting for him. Stryke gives the stairs a Superkick, which causes the steel to fly back in Thugg’s face!

 

(Stevens) – NO! Stryke…with a desperate move there…sending those unforgiving steel steps into Thugg’s face.

 

(Riley) – Now is the time Stryke…now!

 

Thugg drops the stairs, which land flat on the floor in front of Thugg, and Stryke stumbles closer to Thugg, still beaten and bruised. Once upon Thugg, Stryke gives him a hard kick to the gut, doubling the big man over, locks on a front face lock, and then quickly drives Thugg’s head down…

 

BONG!!

 

…into the metal steps on the floor!!

 

(Stevens) – OH MY GOD!! DDT!! DDT!! STRYKE WITH HIS BIGGEST MOVE OF THE MATCH!! A DDT RIGHT ONTO THOSE STEEL STEPS!!

 

“HOLY SHIT!”

 

“HOLY SHIT!”

 

“HOLY SHIT!”

 

“HOLY SHIT!”

 

Thugg’s head bounces off the metal, and he rolls to the floor, where the camera can pick up that his head has been slightly cut by the metal and a very small drop of blood is beginning to form in the middle of his forehead.

 

(Riley) – That’s exactly what Stryke needed!! Thugg’s really hurt from that DDT, and look…I think he’s cut!

 

(Stevens) – Stryke needs to make his move RIGHT NOW! Thugg’s reeling, but how much does he have left after the beating he’s been taking?

 

Stryke rolls to his stomach, and starts to stand, kicking his legs wildly to attempt to gain his footing. With his legs like rubber, Stryke grabs Thugg by his cornrows, and tries to bring him up off the floor. Stryke struggles with this for a moment, but eventually, Thugg’s desire to get up aids Stryke in his endeavor. Stryke pushes Thugg into the ring, with Thugg’s help, and then slides in behind the large DC native. As soon as he is inside, Thugg gets to all fours, trying to get up, but Stryke does manage to make it to his feet. With the fans cheering their heads off, Stryke bounces off the right-side ropes, and as Thugg starts to stand but bent over, Stryke runs to him, jumps in the air, places one leg on the back of Thugg’s head as he’s bent over, and drives Thugg’s already injured head to the canvas with a huge Famasser!!!

 

The crowd explodes!

 

(Stevens) – RECOIL!!! STRYKE HIT IT!!!

 

Thugg’s head hits the canvas, leaving a small blood spot, and then he bounces onto his stomach. A completely drained Stryke crawls on top of Thugg, and lays on his back as he hooks Thugg’s leg…

 

(Stevens) – After being so far down...this could be it for Stryke right here…

 

ONE…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREEEEEEEEE…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Stevens) - …NOOOOOOO!!! THUGG KICKED OUT!! BY GAWD, HE KICKED OUT!!

 

(Riley) – Can you believe that?!? I thought Stryke had it right there!

 

Thugg throws his shoulder in the air, and Stryke rolls off completely dejected as the ref holds up two fingers. A dejected sigh emerges from the crowd as they had really gotten behind the underdog Styrke, but nonetheless, Stryke stares at the referee with the most pathetic, dejected look on his face.

 

(Stevens) – If you think about it, Thugg was relatively fresh compared to Stryke, so it’s not so surprising that he kicked out, although, I really thought Stryke had it there.

 

Thugg still lays belly up on the canvas, the cut on his head a bit larger now, as Stryke staggers to his feet. He wobbles slowly over to the nearest turnbuckle, which happens to be in the near left corner. The Aussie pulls himself up to the top rope, and all the fans in the arena stand and start to cheer.

 

(Stevens) – Just look at the heart from Stryke! He’s going up and he’s looking to take advantage and land the deciding blow!!

 

(Riley) – Can you imagine? If Stryke were to win this match, after taking all that punishment earlier on…sheesh. That would be huge.

 

(Stevens) – Maybe even some kind of record.

 

Stryke rests for a moment of that top rope, and when the fans are at their peak, Stryke takes flight. He soars high in the air, through a sea of flash photography, folds his body in and out, and then comes soaring down…

 

 

 

 

(Stevens & Riley) – OHHHHHH!!!

 

 

 

 

 

…RIGHT ON TOP OF…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

…THUGG’S KNEES!!!

 

(Stevens) – HE MISSED!! THUGG GOT HIS KNEES UP, AND STRYKE LANDED RIGHT ON THEM!!!

 

(Riley) – I think Thugg was baiting him.

 

Stryke pops up and starts to bounce around the ring holding his stomach as the fans buzz all around the arena. It’s not quite cheering, but they are definitely excited, meanwhile, Thugg gets to his feet. Thugg starts to causally stalk Stryke as he bounces around the ring, still in severe pain from the botched All Time High.

 

(Stevens) – Stryke’s in a bad position now…real big trouble.

 

Stryke finally stops bouncing and stands near the far ropes, doubled over and holding his stomach, allowing Thugg to pursue his final blow. Thugg walks close to Stryke, and goes to grab him…

 

(Stevens) – Here comes Thugg to finish off…OH!!

 

…but Stryke drops him with a Drop Toe Hold, and as Thugg falls face-first to the canvas, Stryke stands up at his legs, grabs them up, straddles Thugg’s back, and starts to yank up on Thugg’s legs like a Lionsault!!

 

(Stevens) – ALL TIME HIGH!!! STRYKE BAITED THUGG IN AND NOW HE HAS THE ALL TIME HIGH LOCKED ON!!!

 

The crowd screams with delight as the underdog, Stryke, screams loudly while pulling back on Thugg’s massive legs. The referee, of course, dives into a position in front of HVT where he is able to get a good view of Thugg’s face. While there, the referee constantly asks Thugg if he wants to give up, but the big man repeatedly shakes his head in between yelps of pain.

 

(Riley) – I think Thugg’s gonna tap!! He’s gonna tap to the All Time High!

 

While the fans really rock the arena and Stryke pulls back with all his might, Thugg takes a deep breath, and then pushes his body up with his arms, like in a push up. The fans continue to cheer as Stryke shakes his head profusesly, as if to say “no…no…no!”

 

(Stevens) – NO! He’s not going to tap…Thugg’s going for the ropes!!

 

Sure enough, Thugg begins to walk on his hands towards the far ropes while Stryke does his best to prevent him from getting there. The fans are really screaming now…not sure for whom, but they’re cheering, and Thugg makes a lunge for the ropes, but misses. Stryke pulls back on Thugg’s legs as hard as he can, as Thugg lets out a scream of pain. The ref asks him once again about giving it up, but Thugg shakes his head “no”, and again, pushes up on his hands. Thugg takes one more step closer to the ropes, and then lunges again. This time, he gets it and the fans cheer.

 

(Stevens) – HE GOT IT!! Thugg got to the ropes! Styrke must break the hold!!!

 

Stryke, however, is highly upset by Thugg’s determination to get to the ropes, and instead of breaking the hold, continues to pull back hard on Thugg’s legs. The referee runs over in front of Stryke and begs him to release the submission, while Thugg shakes the bottom rope furiously.

 

(Stevens) – He’s gotta break it!! Break the damn hold!!

 

(Riley) – He’s gonna get disqualified, but I think Stryke may have just lost it, and is frustrated at seeing his comeback attempt thwarted.

 

The ref pleads and pleads with Stryke, but he just keeps pulling. The referee goes to DQ Stryke, but just before he calls for the bell, the Aussie releases Thugg’s legs and Eddy long is satisfied. Thugg, however, is very unhappy, and in serious pain, but this matters not to Stryke, who turns around to face Thugg, grabs him by the right leg, and pulls as hard as he can. Thugg, unable to do much about the predicament, is pulled away from the ropes and back towards the center of the ring!

 

(Stevens) – He released it…BUT STRYKE’S GOING BACK FOR MORE!! HE’S NOT GOING TO LET THIS ONE GET AWAY!

 

The crowd is very pleased with Stryke’s determination, and lets him know it very adamantly. With Thugg away from the ropes now, Stryke goes to pick up Thugg’s other leg to reapply the submission finisher, but HVT turns himself over on his back, and gives the Aussie a hard kick to the face!

 

(Stevens) – But he’s not going to get it!! Thugg with the boot to the face!

 

The fans die down as Stryke stumbles off of Thugg’s legs, allowing the big man to get to his knees where he holds his back in pain. Stryke stumbles about the center of the ring as Thugg gets to his feet, and once he does, Stryke stumbles right into him…

 

WHAM!

 

…and HVT plants him back first on the mat with a Bearhug Front Slam!

 

(Riley) – OH, that’s it! It’s over!

 

(Stevens) – Stryke walked right into that one!

 

Stryke’s back and head bounce off the canvas hard, and the signature move draws a good pop from the crowd. Stryke is sprawled out in the center of the ring, while HVT stands over him, still holding his back. Thugg touches his forehead, where he has been cut, and brings his finger back with blood on the tip. Thugg then puts that finger in his mouth, tasting his own blood, and a look of overwhelming rage comes over his face.

 

(Stevens) – Uh oh.

 

Thugg then runs his thumb across his own throat as a signal, and the fans eat it up, jumping to their feet and getting their cameras ready. After performing the ceremonious ritual, Thugg grabs Stryke up by the hair, whips him to the left-side ropes, and when Stryke returns, Thugg reaches down and presses the Aussie up over his head!

 

(Riley) – Brace yourselves people…here it comes!

 

Thugg stands in the center of the ring with Stryke above his head while thousands of fans take photographs of the feat. Thugg gives them all a good look as he turns slowly to each side of the ring before turning Stryke so he faces forward…

 

WHAM!!!

 

…and slamming Stryke head and neck first between his legs as he sits out for the Front Press Driver!!

 

(Stevens) – LAST STAND!! LAST STAND!! THUGG TRIED IT EARLIER AND FAILED, BUT HE’S HIT IT NOW, AND THIS ONE’S OVER!!!

 

(Riley) – Did you feel that?? I think I just felt a tremor!

 

Thugg kneels beside the lifeless Stryke and tastes his own blood once more. Thugg wipes the excess blood from his head, and then confidently covers Stryke, who has yet to move. While most of the fans cheer, it is significantly less than usual, as many of the fans were behind the underdog, Stryke.

 

ONE…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREEEEEEEEEEEEE…

 

(Stevens) – AND IT’S OVER!!! THUGG WINS!!

 

DING DING DING

 

The bell sounds and the majority of the crowd rejoices, while Thugg stands up holding his back and still touching his head occasionally.

 

(Funyon) – The winner of the match…THE H-VIIIIIIIILLLLLLLEEEEEEE THUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGG!!!!

 

The ref tries to raise Thugg’s arm as his music hits, but Thugg snatches it away and immediately exits the ring. Leaving a comatose Stryke and the ref in the ring, Thugg moves quickly up the ramp, acknowledging no one.

 

(Stevens) – Thugg wins the match, but you gotta hand it to Stryke! He stood toe to toe with Thugg in there, and took everything the big man had to dish out…and nearly won the match! My hat’s gotta go off to the Aussie for his performance tonight.

 

The fans’ cheers slow significantly as Thugg slips behind the curtain, in a hurry, and Storm fades to commercial.

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

“And welcome back our exciting main event!” chimes in ‘Grand Slam’ Mark Stevens as the at-home audience comes back from a commercial break. “This is the last match before the Clusterf*ck PPV, and it sure looks to be a great one. We have 4 of the top Submission and Technical Wrestlers in the SWF, the World Champion, the #1 Contender to the World Champion, the United States Champion, one half of the Tag Champions in the ring-”

 

“And the other is right here,” remarks the Icelandic terror Frost. Between the two tall men sits the shorter Bobby Riley, his gaze shifting back and forth nervously between the two giants.

 

“Yes, folks, Magnificent 7 member and the other half of the Tag Champions, Frost, will be joining us tonight,” continues the amiable play by play announcer, “And hopefully he’ll be able to interject some useful commentary about the Magnificent 7.”

 

“Well, personally, I would have preferred Flesher being here, but-”

 

“But no one cares for your opinion, fool,” growls Frost down to Riley, and the little man instantly clams up as Mark looks across to the ICTV Champion.

 

“Well, at least we have ONE thing in common," grins Stevens. "And right now, we have the ELM, Annie Eclectic, and Mak Francis facing off against Tom Flesher, Danny Williams, and Judge Mental.”

 

”Finally, a great trio of real wrestlers are going to take apart that misfit wreck we call the Midnight Carnival.”

 

“I doubt that Riley. The Carnies and Mak have been working together lately, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they are a better team than the three egos on the Mag-7 side.”

 

“Egos, yes…” says Frost with his gruff yet sophisticated voice, “but they're skilled at what they do. Certainly not to be taken lightly, no matter how highly they hold themselves.”

 

“And don’t forget, Grand Slam,” squeaks in Riley, who can't get a word in edgewise, “the Magnificent 7 members all practice the same basic style. With the patchwork stuff on the other side, I don’t think the Carnies and their tagalong stand a chance.” And with that, the lights fade, and the crowd waits for who will be first.

 

“Midnight Carnival…”

 

The sweet female voice whispers the two words across the speaker system, and, following Newton’s Third Law, the crowd gives an equal but opposite reaction by cheering as loud as their voices will let them! The SmarkTron begins flashing bright white with the opening beats of “Love Rollercoaster” by the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and the fans begin clapping it to the beat as thin black letters appear on the massive screen, spelling out....

 

“STEP RIGHT UP!”

 

The guitar part drops in, and three laser lights appear at the middle of the ramp and begin flashing around the arena.

 

“Weighing in at a combined 368 pounds and members of the Midnight Carnival….”

 

“Rollercoaster… of Love….”

 

The crowd sings the familiar line with the song, and the laser lights flare into a bluish haze that begins to travel across the entrance as El Luchadore Magnifico and Annie Eclectic walk out from behind the curtain to an earthquaking pop!

 

“… EL LUCHADORE MAGNIFICO AND ANNIE ECLECTIC!”

 

The refrain starts for the first time and the arena is plunged back into darkness and funky staccato bursts of laser light take turns illuminating either one of the duo. “I SO hope that one of those lights nails them in the eyes and blinds them for life…” says an irritated Riley while on the big screen, half-second clips of classic Carnival moments are replayed, and the two Carnies slide into the ring awaiting their partner as the house lights shut off.

 

“Also with the Carnies….”

 

“So do you wanna’ be a Franchise… And live large… A big house… five cars…”

 

The SmarkTron flares up with a blue and white photonegative image of Mak Francis, which is followed by ‘The Franchise’ in large green lettering, flashing on the screen in time with the beat.

 

“The rent charge… Comin’ up in the world, don’t trust nobody… Gotta’ look over your shoulder constantly!”

 

As the opening lyrics from Rock Superstar by Cypress Hill, slightly altered of course, blare over the PA system, it takes a little while but eventually the self proclaimed Franchise makes his way through the curtain. The lights come back up and Francis comes out onto the stage, tilting his shades down on the bridge of his nose, before looking left and then right…

 

“I remember the days, when I was a young kid grownin’ up… Lookin’ in the mirror dreamin’ about blowin’ up!”

 

“Weighing in at 225 pounds…. MAK FRANCIS!”

 

That cues multiple short bursts of green pyrotechnics erupting from either side of him. He readjusts his shades with a smirk, before slowly strolling down to ringside and after walking up the ring steps, he cockily wipes his feet on the apron, giving a mock salute to the crowd, before entering through the middle ropes. Francis climbs the nearest turnbuckle and poses with both fists raised in the air. He steps down and slaps hands with his Carnie teammates as they await their challengers.

 

“Well, we have one team, now for the othe,” says Grand Slam, and the lights have already dimmed down to a deep, stately blue.

 

“And their opponents…”

 

“Here we are…”

 

Blue pyros go off in either direction as “Princes of the Universe” by Queen nobly rings throughout the arena. On the SmarkTron, the words “MAGNIFICENT 7”, “TECHNICAL BRILLIANCE”, “CHAMPION TRIUMVIRATE” flash blue against black as the music trails off….

 

Suddenly, the deep guitars begin to play, and the arena lights shift from a stately blue to a harsh, angry red. The SmarkTron flashes 5-second clips of various finishers from the Magnificent 7, even with Ejiro and Fugue included, but one person is noticeably missing.

 

“Hey, Frost, where are you in tha-”

 

“Shut up, you moron,” responds Frost quickly, obviously not happy with the ‘liberties’ Flesher has taken with the stable entrance.

 

“And here we are….”

 

As that line hits, a row of massive red pyros light off, and the men themselves step out in all their glory.

 

“Weighing in at a combined 693 pounds.... from the Magnificent 7…. TOM FLESHER, DANNY WILLIAMS AND JUDGE MENTAL!” Massive boos from the crowd come down upon the trio as they go down the ring, exactly instep with each other like a polished military drill team. They climb into the ring and go to their corner, where they huddle up together and go over any last second changes to their plan.

 

“Well, it certainly looks like the Magnificent 7 are far more prepared than the ragtag band on the other side. I mean, did you see them come down to the ring? And look, they’re planning their attack!” brags Riley, but Frost dashes that away.

 

“It won’t matter how well they enter the ring if the fearless leader in there can’t keep all their egos down, especially his own.” The face team appears ready, sending Annie Eclectic out into the ring while Mak and ELM stand on either side of their corner. The heels peer out of their huddle, and both Flesher and Mental exit to the apron as Danny Williams is the first Magnificent 7 member in the ring.

 

“It looks like Williams and Annie are going to start off the match, considering their history together this should be quite interesting,” speculates Stevens.

 

“If there is one person that Annie hates more than Judge Mental, it’s Danny Williams,” declares Riley.

 

 

DING! DING! DING!

 

 

“And we are underway!” shouts Stevens as the bell rings. The anxious crowd burst into cheers as Williams and Annie march out of their corners, making their way to the center of the ring. The two rivals circle each other, exchanging cold glares. The two pause and lock up in a collar-elbow tie, but Annie immediately breaks the grapple, and rocks Williams with a stiff European uppercut! (Crack!) To the shock of Annie and the rest of the crowd, Williams crumbles to the mat, landing on his back with a thud!

 

“I don’t believe it! Annie has floored Williams with a single punch!” yells Riley in disbelief.

 

“Williams never could take a closed fist punch very well. If you recall, I scored a flash knockdown over him in our cage match last year,” brags Frost.

 

Delirious, Williams crawls around on the mat cluelessly. Annie takes a few steps back, eying him up. His senses gradually returning to him, Williams climbs up to one knee. Unfortunately for Williams, that's just where Annie wants him to be! Annie leaps into the air, and kicks her boots out for her patent seated dropkick!

 

“DROPKISS!” cries Stevens, but Williams rolls out of the way, letting Annie splat on the mat! Williams doesn’t stop rolling until he reaches the ropes, using them to quickly get back to his feet. Once Annie scrambles to a vertical base, Williams launches himself off the ropes at her. Annie extends her leg for the superkick, but Williams ducks and rolls underneath it! Realizing her error, Annie spins around, to find Williams waiting for her!

 

“DYNAMIC KICK!” screams Riley as Williams leaps into the air and fires his trademark high kick... but Annie spins out of the way, catching Williams with a superkick as he turns around! Smack! The crowd gives a huge pop as Williams staggers backwards into his corner!

 

“Just like in their Four Corners match a few short weeks ago, Williams looked to counter the superkick with a Dynamic Kick, but this time Annie knew it was coming and was ready with a counter of her own!” explains Grand Slam excitedly.

 

Mental tags Williams’ shoulder, and speeds into the ring after the Hardcore Queen. Mental extends his arm for a clothesline, but Annie casually steps out of the way, taking him to the mat with a Fujiwara armbar! The crowd rises to their feet, as Mental cries out in anguish.

 

“In a shocking turn of events, Annie actually performs a wrestling move,” jokes Riley.

 

“Bah, submission wrestling is overrated,” grumbles Frost.

 

“Well, I don’t think your Magnificent 7 teammates would agree with you.”

 

“Stevens, after 5 years studying philosophy, I’ve learned that keeping things simple work best. Slamming a man on his head is simple and has worked wonders for me. No need to complicate things with ego-stroking submissions and the like.”

 

Not even having left the ring yet, Williams charges to the scene, breaking up the submission with a hard stomp to Annie’s back. Suddenly, though, Williams shuffles his feet into a 360 degree spin, and blasts Francis with a surprise rolling elbow! Francis flies off the apron, crashes into the guardrail, and sinks to the floor. ELM hops down to the floor to assist his ailing team mate, while the crowd vents their frustration with a loud chorus of “Boooooooooooooooos!”.

 

“Williams with an unprovoked cheap shot on The Franchise!” says Stevens, clearly disapproving.

 

“Unprovoked! Give me a break, Francis shouldn’t have been napping on the apron,” snaps Riley.

 

Frost offers his explanation. “I’m sure there is not a day that goes by that Danny doesn’t think about his humiliating non-title loss to Francis last December. In Williams’ mind, he thinks that if he shows Francis up enough, he can erase that part of his past.”

 

Ignoring Soapdish’s warnings, Williams turns around, and nails Annie with a Dynamic Kick as she gets up! Smack! Williams confidently struts back to this corner to the accompaniment of an “ASSHOLE!” chant. Flesher golf claps for Williams, congratulating him on a job well done. After shaking off the pain in his arm, Mental pulls Annie up by her tights, and applies a full nelson!

 

“Judge, looking for a Dragon Suplex!” screams Riley.

 

Before the crowd can even react, Annie runs into the ropes, securing a boot around the bottom one.

 

“A little early to be trying a big move like that” says Frost. ”Judge shouldn’t be underestimating Annie E by trying something like that without preparing her.”

 

Not to be denied, Mental rips Annie off the ropes by her tights, and grabs a rear waistlock! Before Mental can bridge back, Annie unleashes a flurry of sharp back elbows on his head! With Mental weakened, Annie frees herself from his grasp, and runs into the ropes! Annie bounces back at Mental, nailing him with a cross body press! Instead of staying on him for the pin, Annie rolls off Mental, and tags in ELM! The crowd blows the roof off the building as ELM springboards into the ring like some sort of Mexican superhero!

 

“The World Champion, making his first appearance in match!” says Stevens.

 

“Damn, it feels like he’s been the Champion forever now. I can’t wait until Flesher takes the belt from him,” says Riley wistfully.

 

ELM rushes Mental as he gets up, assaulting him with a flurry of chest stinging Knife Edge Chops!

Smack! (“Wooooo!”)

 

Smack! (“Wooooo!”)

 

Smack! (“Woooooo!”)

 

Mental staggers back into the ropes, his chest already turning red. With Mental corned, ELM pounds his sternum with a vicious roundhouse kick... (Smack!) ...then follows it with another stiff chop!

 

Smack! (“Wooooooo!”)

 

Moving faster than light, ELM repeats the kick/chop combo three more times, with each set being stiffer than last! The crowd tries to keep up the “Woooos!”, but it’s impossible. Judge teeters against the ropes, his eyes rolling back in his head like he’s out on his feet. ELM draws back his leg once more, and shocks the crowd by slamming the side of his boot into Judge’s jaw! CRACK! With a blank expression on his face, Judge lifelessly slides down the ropes. “Let me have him!” screams Annie, who is holding her hand out for the tag.

 

“Typical woman, stay at home and let the man do all the work, only to steal his hard-earned money come pay day,” groans Riley.

 

Not one to be selfish, ELM tags Annie in, but remains in the ring. Annie and ELM each grab an arm and pull Mental up. The Carnies send Mental running with an Irish whip, catching him on the rebound with a double superkick!

 

“Impressive communication by the Carnies,” compliments Stevens.

 

Upset about the Carnie’s double team, Riley bitches “Come on ref, ELM has no business being in there!”

 

Mental hits the mat like a sack of bricks, and Annie covers while ELM leaves the ring.

 

“Mental’s out cold, this could be it!” barks Frost.

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Flesher breaks up the count with a nasty doublestomp to Annie’s back! “Booooooooooo!” complains the fans, as Flesher leaves the ring, golf clapping for himself. Holding her back and clinching her teeth in pain, Annie tries to get up but finds herself in paralyzing pain.

 

“Annie’s hurt!” declares Riley.

 

“As we all know, she has been wrestling with injured ribs for the past couple of months, and I don’t think a doublestomp helped matters.” inquires Stevens.

 

“Smart ass.” mumbles Riley.

 

Taking advantage of Annie’s handicap, Mental rolls to the M7 corner, and tags in Flesher. “Flesher Sucks!” chants the crowd, as Flesher enthusiastically enters the ring. Tom pulls Annie up by her hair, and sends her back to the mat with a mean spirited Scoop Slam! In great pain, Annie spasms on the mat, her face contorted in agony. Showing no mercy, Flesher leaps into the air, delivering a Fat Ass Senton~! to the wounded Hardcore Queen! Rather than covering Annie, Flesher climbs to his feet, looks at ELM, and brings his hands across his waist to signal he’s going to be wearing a belt soon.

 

Riley proclaims “There he is, ladies and gentlemen, our next SWF World Champion.”

 

The crowd boos the shit out of Flesher, but ELM keeps his cool, and shrugs the taunt off.

 

“Yeah, but he won’t be keeping that belt very long after I win Clusterfuck,” adds Frost.

 

Riley responds, “I don’t care, who ends up with the damn belt. Anybody but that damn midget, Magnifico. He’s been killing the ratings for too long.”

 

Flesher turns his attention back to Annie, crushing her stomach with a disturbingly stiff doublestomp! Annie tries to scream, but her lungs have no air in them, all she can do is open her mouth and gag. In a last line of defense, she rolls over on her back, clutching her brittle ribs. This doesn’t stop Flesher from bringing the pain, he just simply lands a second doublestomp on her lower back! Feeling confident, Flesher stands a single boot on Annie’s back, and applauds himself. Empty beer cups rain down upon the ring, some successfully hitting Flesher, others missing by a mile and hitting poor Soapdish. Out of the corner of his eye, Flesher spots a weary Francis climbing back on to the apron. Flesher picks up a head full of steam, and slams a shotei into Francis’ face, knocking him off the apron yet again! The fans jump out of their seats in disgust, lowering their thumbs while screaming profane taunts at Tom.

 

“Francis just hasn’t gotten a break, tonight.” moans Stevens.

 

“At first I thought this just might have between him and Williams, but it looks like it’s been M7's plan all along to take Francis out of this thing.” suspects Frost.

 

“But why Francis, and not the World Champion?” asks Stevens.

 

Riley shrugs his shoulders and responds, “Maybe because he’s the only one in the ring that will cheat more than them.”

 

Flesher turns his attention back to Annie, who is painfully climbing back to her feet. The Superior One calmly sends her back to the mat with a scoop slam, before casually tagging the Judge. Mental rushes into the ring, grabbing the legs of his prone victim. Mental tucks Annie’s legs beneath his arm pits, and turns her over into a high angle Boston crab! Despite being in intolerable pain, Annie musters the strength to ease the pressure on her back with a push up. Annie sets her sights on the ropes, which she promptly begins crawling towards. The crowd shows their support by chanting “ANN-E! ANN-E! ANN-E!”. ELM leads the chant with hand claps, while Francis remains on the floor in a stupor. Judge tries to keep Annie in the center of the ring, but it’s no use. Finding it difficult to keep the hold applied correctly with Annie moving, Mental has no choice but to scoot along with her. With the chant getting louder and faster with each passing second, the Hardcore Queen finds herself within arm's reach of the bottom rope. She extends her hand as far as it can go, only for it be brutally stomped to the mat by a Doc Marten. “Booooooooo!” groan the angered fans, as Flesher grinds his boot into Annie’s hand. ELM jumps up and down in protest, bringing Flesher’s actions to Soapdish’s attention.

 

With joy in his eyes, Riley happily declares “Now I like this! A very effective and creative way to keep Annie from the ropes.”

 

“I’m not sure of the legality of it, though” adds Stevens

 

Soapdish will have none of this, threatening Flesher with a count. Flesher rolls his eyes as he releases Annie’s crushed hand, and hesitantly steps back on to the apron. Now free, Annie desperately grabs hold of the bottom of the rope. Judge doesn’t let go, so Soapdish starts to count. With Soapdish distracted, Flesher kicks Annie right in the mouth! “Boooooooooooo!” moans the disgusted crowd. Annie goes limp from pain, releasing the bottom rope in the process. Mental drags Annie back to the center of the ring, and slaps on a camel clutch! By this time, Williams has made it back on to the apron. Feeling that Annie is too comfortable, Mental pulls back on the camel clutch until he’s squatting on his ass. Annie cries out loud as her body threatens to snap in half.

 

“Oh my God, will you look that! Mental is just torturing Annie with a Joshi-style camel clutch,” calls Stevens

 

“Annie’s the Slim Jim, and Mental is Randy Savage!” says Riley.

 

Out of nowhere Frost growls “Snap into it, Oooooooooh Yeah!”

 

“TNT would be proud... but I have NO idea who this Savage guy is...” covers Stevens.

 

Suddenly the crowd’s shock turns into anger as Williams enters the ring. Williams walks in front of Annie, sticks his middle fingers in her face, and than precedes to slam his boot into her stretched out abdomen! Thump! Thump! Thump! The repulsed crowd gasps as each kick gruesomely connects. ELM flinches along, but there’s nothing he can do.

 

“Ouch, it hurts just to watch. How can Annie stand it?” questions Riley.

 

“The last thing Annie is is a quitter, but sometimes even I doubt her sanity,” admits Stevens.

 

Soapdish has had enough, ordering Williams to leave or be DQed. Faced with no other alternative, Williams goes back to his corner. However, Mental keeps Annie stretched out with the camel clutch. Suddenly, Francis rolls into the ring, triggering an explosion of cheers. With a determined look on his face, Francis breaks up the submission hold by slowly raking his hands across Mental’s eyes. Leaving Mental blinded on the mat, Francis charges at the M7 corner! With his sights set on Flesher, Francis extends his leg for the Yakuza kick!

 

The entire crowd gasps in anticipation....

 

but at the last possible second, Flesher jumps off the apron to the safety of the floor. Wearing a snug smirk, Flesher taps his index finger on his temple to let Francis know who’s smarter, and mouths the words, "I've got the brains." Ignoring Flesher, Francis spins his leg back into the ring, regains his balance, and blasts Williams with an unsuspected dropkick! The excited fans leap out of their seats, and give a standing ovation!

 

“Francis, extracting some payback from M7!” shouts Stevens.

 

“Just Danny Williams, Stevens. Once again, Flesher proves that Francis is no match for him at mental checkers,” responds Riley.

 

Steven’s rolls his eyes, and corrects his partner, “I think you mean chess, Riley.”

 

“No, checkers. I don’t think Francis has the brainpower for chess. Or even pinochle, for that matter.”

 

Finally giving in to Soapdish’s orders, Francis marches back to his corner as the crowd enthusiastically chants “FRAN-CHISE!” Rubbing his eyes and blinking rapidly, Mental climbs back to his feet, though Annie is still down. Mental drags Annie up with a front facelock, and walks her to the M7 corner. Mental tags in Flesher, but Williams enters the ring. While Flesher barks orders, Williams drives a few elbows into Annie’s back while Mental holds her in place with the facelock. With Annie softened up, Williams and Judge each grab an arm, cross it over her abdomen and hold her head down so that she’s doubled over. Flesher than makes his heroic entrance into the ring, hopping on Annie’s back, triumphantly posing on one knee while flexing his biceps like a conquering warrior.

 

“Bwahahahahahahahaha, I love these guys. I hope our photographers got some pictures, because it would be a crime for this not to make the cover of the February issue of SWF magazine” chuckles Riley.

 

Unamused, Stevens speaks in a disgusted tone “Give me a break, can you believe the ego on this guy?”

 

“It’s sad to think that they could just pin her right now and get the damn match over with,” adds an irritated Frost, “but just like I said, if they can’t control their own egos, the may just lose this thing.”

 

Mak and ELM begin to go under the ropes even before Soapdish turns around, and he has his back turned to the whole ordeal. The two men yell at him to turn around, but the adamant ref tells them to get back out of the ring, wary of any tricks from either side, allowing Flesher even more time to pose. Finally, ELM and Mak back up onto the apron, and he turns around to see the trio posing and begins yelling at Flesher to get down now! The Superior One complies, getting off and taking Annie by the head as Danny and Mental go back through the ropes. Soapdish warns Flesher this time against any funny business, and Tom simply smiles as the crowd begins to start another “YOU SUCK, FLESHER! CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP!”

 

The Superior One takes it in stride, easily ignoring them as he whips Annie at the ropes one handed, and on the rebound Flesher tosses her overhead with a big Railgun suplex! Annie arches her back off the ground in pain as Flesher rolls back up to his feet and lifts her up from behind, cinching a waistlock in the process.

 

WHAM!

 

In one big motion, the Magnificent 7 leader brings the Hardcore Queen down with a released German suplex! Again, Annie spasms as here back takes most of the blow, and Flesher tags in Danny, who brings Annie up to here feet, and…

 

WHAM!

 

Another German suplex! He bridges this across, but before Nick Soapdish can even get down for a count he breaks the pin himself and gets up. He holds his back a little, mockingly acting like he might have lifted too much, before he tags Mental. The Judge goes through the ropes as Annie struggles to her knees before making a break for the Carnie Corner… but the Judge is far quicker than the tired Eclectic, grabbing her at the shoulder and pulling her back. He raises her off the ground quickly, cinching a waist lock….

 

WHAM!

 

And yet ANOTHER German suplex! The Judge rolls back to tag Flesher up while the agonized Annie lies on the ground. He picks her up and steadies her as she weakly stands up before he takes her arms and wraps them around her body before….

 

WHAM!

 

“Straitjacket Suplex! They are just content with taking turns torturing Annie Eclectic out there!” says a sickened Grand Slam.

 

“Figures Flesher would try to turn this match into a glorified pissing contest…” remarks Frost, and Riley opens his mouth to speak.

 

“We-”

 

“Don’t even THINK about saying anything, Bobbie,” interrupts Grand Slam, and the production staff gives a sigh of relief. That’s one less call from an angry but confused parent about some gay guy and his obsession with flesh.

 

Flesher doesn’t even hold onto the straitjacket, as he gets back up and tags….

 

 

 

 

 

…. The referee? Yes! He slaps five with an absolutely stunned Nick Soapdish, and begins to point at Annie as if it was his turn to suplex her. Of course, outstanding man that he is, Nick is absolutely appalled and begins yelling at him for all the crap he’s been pulling so far. This allows Annie to begin crawling towards Corner Carnival! The crowd cheers her on with “ANNIE! ANNIE ANNIE!” chants while Mak and ELM stretch out as far as each of them can for Annie’s hand.

 

“I knew his **** would cost them the match,” says a frustrated Frost as Annie gets closer and closer, to the ropes. Flesher tries to get past Soapdish, but he’s not quite through with him. He quickly motions gives a hand motion to Mental and Danny.

 

“Annie’s almost there! If she can tag Mak, the Carnie team will have a fresh man in the ring!” Grand Slam says as the crowd begins to swell with cheers, but they immediately big to fade as Williams and the Judge begin to come out of the corner and quickly grab Annie’s legs and pull her backwards. ELM thinks fast, though, leaping onto the ropes to land a springboard plancha that floors both of them! As she feels them release her Annie scrambles a little quicker as Flesher busts past the ref to try to stop the tag…

 

 

 

*SLAP*

 

 

 

The crowd bursts into frenzied cheers as Annie Eclectic finally reaches her corner and manages to tag in Mak Francis! The Philadelphia native grabs the top rope and slingshots himself into the ring, with Flesher still distracted ("Listen, Soapdish, you get over there and suplex her like a man!") Francis measures the distance, then immediately takes a quick step forward. He hits his stride at a full-on charge, and as Flesher turns around, he realizes exactly what Mak's looking for.

 

Unfortunately for Tom, there's no time.

 

WHACK! Flesher's head snaps violently to the side as Mak Francis nails him in the jaw with an absolutely vicious Yakuza kick, and the fans go wild!

 

"Maybe if he wasn't so concerned with looking good..." says Frost before trailing off.

 

"Mak Francis FINALLY hits Tom Flesher with a Yakuza kick," says Mark Stevens, "and now we see why Flesher's been avoiding it for so long!"

 

Sure enough, Flesher crumbles to the mat like a ton of bricks, never even knowing what hit him. With that, Mak Francis drops onto him, hooks the leg, and looks expectantly at Nick Soapdish. Everyone's favorite bathtb safety accessory drops to the mat and counts

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THR- NO!!!! Danny Williams breaks the pin with a falling elbow to Francis's back, and El Luchadore Magnifico retaliates by entering the ring! Before Soapdish can even warn either of the competitors, all hell has broken loose and all six wrestlers are in the ring!

 

"This is a debacle!" shouts Stevens. "Nick Soapdish is losing control!"

 

"Well, he had lost control already. I mean, why did he count that pin? Flesher wasn't legal!"

 

"Of course he was!" says Stevens offendedly. "Who do you think was legal?"

 

"Soapdish!"

 

Stevens sighs and Frost just chuckles, slightly out of the ordinary and prompting an uncomfortable silence. Frost coughs, and then says, "Well, it IS fairly amusing."

 

In the ring, Danny Williams has El Luchadore Magnifico blocked off in the corner and pops him with a rock-hard elbow! Magnifico staggers backwards, but shakes off the blow relatively quickly, having taken several of Williams' combos in previous matches and being adequately prepared for them. Williams grabs Magnifico and whips him to the ropes, just as Judge Mental grabs Mak Francis and lifts him off the mat. He holds Francis in an upside-down position, ready to go for his tombstone piledriver. Magnifico hits the ropes, but instead of rebounding, he leaps into the air, bounces off the middle rope and jumps off with an Asai moonsault body block! As he arches through the air, Magnifico shifts his weight and changes his trajectory, managing to nail Williams AND send Mental and Francis spilling to the mat! Francis, on the way down, snags Mental's leg and cradles him for

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THRE- NO!!!!! Mental breaks the cradle at the last second and kicks out! Mak rolls through to his feet an eyelash faster than Judge. As the jurist gets up, Francis stalks behind him and throws his arms arond his waist to attempt his Filthy German™. Mental, though, thinks fast and throws a stiff back elbow to break the grip, then angles his arm back and....

 

"SURPRISE WITNESS!" hollers Riley. "Judge Mental calls a Surprise Witness, and this one's OVER!"

 

Francis pops up and immediately falls back in a Nestea Plunge. Mental rolls over and covers him for

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THRE- ANNIE ECLECTIC!!!!! Annie enters the ring and breaks the pin with a low-flying Dropkiss! Mental rolls off to the side, and as Flesher starts to get back to his feet, Mak remains on the mat and Williams and Magnifico brawl in the corner. Annie grabs Judge and whips him to the ropes. Mental rebounds and, simultaneously, Magnifico begins to gain the upper hand in his grapple. Magnifico nails Williams with a quick and dirty koppo kick, improvised as best he can with only five feet of somersault space. Danny, understandably, is stunned. As Annie catches Judge and sends him overhead with a back body drop, Magnifico jumps into the air, looks back to ensure the setup is complete, and plants his feet into Deathwish's abdomen. With a well-practiced fall backwards, Magnifico curls his legs back and then powerfully extends them, sending Williams through the air with a picture-perfect monkey flip! To add insult to injury, Williams lands directly on top of Judge Mental! The fans rise to their feet and begin to applaud and cheer.

 

"Now THAT'S teamwork," grizzles Frost.

 

"And are you implying that that's something the Magnificent Seven lacks?" asks Riley sarcastically.

 

"I didn't say that," Frost says.

 

Stevens interjects, "Can we get some syrup for all that waffling?"

 

More surprised than injured, Williams pops up while Mental grabs at his ribs. Williams is still slightly disoriented, though, and he spins around only to see Annie Eclectic right in front of him! Annie throws a forearm blow that Williams absorbs. Demonstrating his willingness to take one to give one, Williams answers back with an elbow to the skull that sends a sickening bone-on-bone crack echoing through the arena. Annie nearly collapses, and Williams grabs her. He threads one arm around hers, then grapevines a leg and sits back comfortably into an abdominal stretch. Eclectic, for her part, merely screams out loud.

 

"Danny Williams, methodically trying to dismantle Annie Eclectic by simply destroying her rib cage," notes Stevens gravely. "This does not bode well for the Carnies."

 

"Bodes well for me," says Riley chipperly, "I put a twenty on this one!"

 

"Thought Flesher would win this battle before he loses the war on Sunday, Bobby?" Frost speaks with a tone that approximates 'what a smirk sounds like.'

 

"Frost," interjects Stevens, "aren't you at least rooting for your leader?"

 

"I'd say, Mark, that I've got more important things to look ahead to on Sunday."

 

Flesher and Francis grapple on the sidelines as Williams keeps Annie trapped in the painful submission hold. After a flurry of shoteis, Tom gains the upper hand and grabs Francis by the back of the neck, ushering him over the top rope. He steps a few feet back, and when Francis gets to his feet, Flesher sails through and nails him with a baseball slide that ends with an apron-supported headscissors. Quickly, Flesher rolls over, taking advantage of his height on the apron for a ring-assisted flying headscissors that sends Francis sprawling to the concrete!

 

"What a maneuver!" says Riley. "You know, that man just amazes me sometimes."

 

"Oh, you don't even know," sighs Frost.

 

Flesher springs to his feet and spins around, looking sufficiently self-satisfied and ready to take Magnifico out. Mental, meanwhile, is taking advantage of Francis's, shall we say, disposition by grabbing a breather in the corner. Magnifico sees Flesher turning and welcomes him back to the match with a vicious, vicious dropkick to the face! Flesher staggers backwards, but before he can tumble over the top, the completely legal immigrant grabs him and drags him to the center. Williams continues cranking his submission, but watches with great concern as Magnifico hooks the stunned Flesher's leg, then lifts him up into the air and sends him crashing to the mat with a Barrio Buster! The fans get to their feet and cheer out loud as Magnifico leaps back to his feet, takes a second to make the throat-slit signal, and then bounds toward the corner!

 

"Mexican Pride Press coming up!" says Stevens excitedly. "El Luchadore Magnifico is about to once and for all get a decisive victory over Tom Flesher!"

 

"That will certainly give him momentum on Sunday," nods Frost.

 

"Frost, what are you still doing out here? You're not going to let this happen, are you?!" Riley pleads with the Velvet Hammer. Frost simply sits silent.

 

Williams looks anguishedly between Magnifico climbing the ropes and Annie Eclectic almost ready to submit. After doing a quick cost-benefit analysis in his mind, Williams simply growls, "I'll get back to you later" and slings Annie to the ground to hold her sore ribs. Magnifico turns to face the center of the ring, ready to make his shooting star jump, but Danny Williams charges at him and rocks the turnbuckle with the concussive force of his muscled body. Magnifico loses his balance, but as Danny tries to pull him down, the Luchadore leaps off and hits a flying enzuigiri that sends Williams tumbling to the outside! Magnifico regains his footing, just in time for Judge Mental to charge out of the corner and rock him with a lariat that sends HIM to the floor as well!

 

Meanwhile, Tom Flesher begins to regain his senses and, acting solely on instinct, grabs the sore, battered Annie Eclectic and drags her to the center. He rolls on top of her, and the thankful Nick Soapdish drops down and counts

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THREE!!!!- NO!!!!!! Annie gets a shoulder up, and the crowd gasps. Flesher wears a look of complete and utter shock, but not for long, since Annie wipes it off his face with a stiff right hand.

 

"Annie Eclectic, somehow miraculously getting a shoulder up, and now, miraculously, fighting off her back!" Stevens is clearly impressed.

 

"That's not POSSIBLE!" says Riley. "She's a WOMAN! They're not useful for ANYTHING!"

 

Uncomfortable silence.

 

Right then. Let's just move on.

 

Annie throws another stiff punch, which Flesher half-catches and half-deflects. Operating instinctively once again, Tom throws a palm to her temple that quiets her down slightly. Keeping her right arm trapped, he shouts for the reasonably fresh Judge Mental, then rolls Annie to her stomach.

 

Tom locks in a double chicken wing, but Annie fights it as best she can. She kicks, flails and tries desperately to break the hold. Flesher fights back and finally forces her to be still with a knee to the ribs. Keeping the double chicken wing, Tom kicks over into a bridge, locking on the Cattle Mutilation submission! On cue, Judge Mental steps in and grabs Annie's legs, lifting them into a Boston crab and sitting back as far as he possibly can. Annie screams out loud, with practically every joint on her body being stretched and an inordinate amount of pressure on her lower back. Flesher, in the bridge, can be see shouting at her to submit, while Mental simply smirks.

 

Annie holds out, her face twisted with pain and her abdominal muscles cramping.

 

"Can she hold out?!" says Stevens. "Can Annie Eclectic hold out long enough for some assistance from her teammates?"

 

Flesher continues shouting for Annie to submit. Finally, it's too mch for her. Her ribs simply can't take the assault, and she screams, "I GIVE UP!"

 

 

DING DING DING!!!!

 

 

Flesher and Mental stay in the hold, however, even as Funyon announces, "Your winners by submission, THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN!!!!"

 

As Flesher and Mental refuse to release the hold, Nick Soapdish tries to help by jostling Mental, who simply ignores him. Finally, Mak Francis and El Luchadore Magnifico manage to roll into the ring and administer the beatings to get the Mag-7 to release their excruciating submission. Williams enters, and in the blink of an eye, a three-on-three brawl ensues.

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

The three members of the Magnificent Seven brawl in the ring with the three-man team of Mak Francis and the Midnight Carnival. Squared off, Tom against Magnifico, Williams against Francis and Mental against a battered Annie, the teams continue assaulting each other.

 

"What chaos!" shouts Stevens. "This is a debacle! And look at that- Judge Mental is shamelessly working Annie Eclectic over!"

 

"Hey, can't blame the guy," says Frost. "All's fair in love and war."

 

Suddenly, the fans are on their feet cheering as the curtain on the stage parts. Alex Zenon and the Canadian Intelligence Agent come bounding out, ready to join their stablemates in their fight against the Magnificent Seven! They slide into the ring and their presence is immediately felt. CIA grabs Mental and pulls him off Annie, hammering him with a bionic elbow that staggers the judge. Mental fights back with a European uppercut, but can't compete with CIA after putting in a long six-man match and is soon sent to the corner.

 

Alex Zenon, meanwhile, steps up behind Flesher and simply hammers him with a forearm strike to the back of the head. This stuns the man on the King's Road, leaving him wide open for Zenon to lock him in a double chicken wing and send him overhead with a vicious high-angle tiger suplex!

 

"And the Midnight Carnival turns the tables!" shouts Stevens gleefully. "Alex Zenon and CIA come out and immediately shift the balance of power!"

 

"What a pair of cowards!" spits Riley. "Judge Mental, Tom Flesher and Danny Williams have worked hard for the whole match, and now they're just engaging in some innocent extra-curricular activity when these two schmucks have to run out and ruin things!"

 

Frost sits silently for a moment, and then says, "I have to go do something, boys. It's been a pleasure."

 

Frost stands up and calmly removes his headset, then strides coolly toward the ring. He enters, and very focused but very calm, grabs CIA and yanks him full force off of Judge Mental. He pulls the Canadian away and throws him like a rag doll into the corner, then hammers him with the Touch of Frost heart punch! As Flesher rolls out of the ring, stunned from Zenon's tiger suplex, Frost pauses for a moment. Taking a deep breath, he spins around and clobbers CIA with a spinning back fist!

 

"Our broadcast partner for this evening has left us, and now he's taking names in the ring!" says Mark Stevens. "Could this get any more chaotic.

 

Oh, poor, naive Mark.

 

Flesher reaches under the ring and, pleased, finds a ladder. He pulls it out and begins to set it up on the outside, when all of a sudden, the already-exited fans begin to cheer as loud as they possibly can.

 

"Riley! Look! Coming through the crowd! It's the Thugg!"

 

Sure enough, making his way through the crowd is the HVille Thugg! HVT steps over the guardrail and jumps onto the ring apron, his eyes ablaze with anger. He rends his way through the crowd, finally settling on the corner where Frost is slaughtering CIA.

 

Flesher, still on the outside, shouts to Danny Williams, who clobbers Magnifico with two quick elbows and then throws him over the top rope as Flesher yanks the rope down. Magnifico spills to the outside, where not only does Flesher strike him with a vicious palm strike, but Williams leans out and kicks him in the back of the head! Flesher takes advantage of the assault and throws Magnifico onto the ladder, hooking his legs into the rungs.

 

Thugg and Frost stand toe-to-toe, neither man wanting to give up ground. Suddenly, one more person comes sprinting out of the locker room.

 

"BO! IT'S BO!" shouts Riley, obviously far too excited for his own good. "This is the biggest brawl I've ever seen, and here comes Bo to even the odds!"

 

Flesher succeeds in getting Magnifico tied into the ladder, with more than a little help from Danny Williams. He climbs up to the rung below and, with a quick flip backwards, locks on a bodyscissors dragon sleeper.

 

"BOW DOWN TO GLORY!!!!!!!" Riley is so excited that he's screeching like a little girl. "Flesher's got Magnifico bowing down to glory on the ladder!!!!!!"

 

"This is complete and utter carnage!" says Stevens. "We need someone to come out here and restore order immediately!"

 

"WHY?! This is great!!"

 

Thugg and Bo stare each other down for a few moments before Frost steps up and shoves Thugg to the side. This escalates into a shoving match between the three, with Bo angry that Frost is trying to horn in on his territory, and the beef between Frost and Thugg stemming back to the weeks after SWF Holds Down Christmas. Thugg and Bo, of course, have a rich history.

 

The ring is full of people pushing, shoving, punching, kicking, and ultimately simply brawling. On the outside, Tom Flesher has El Luchadore Magnifico locked in a ladder-assisted Bow Down To Glory dragon sleeper.

 

"SOMEBODY stop this! This is erupting into a full-scale Clusterf*ck!!!!!" pleads Stevens. "We need to save this for next weekend!"

 

And yet, the fighting continues, even as we fade.

 

SWF Storm, January 23, 2003

© 2003 White Apple Productions

All Rights Reserved

"SWF: Raising Workrate By Writing Faster"

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Guest TheBostonStrangler

SWF STORM RECAP!!!!!!!

 

King starts off this show by talking. Hmmm....interesting stuff. Still, King keeps us all from nodding off to sleep by giving the Clusterfuck winner the right to name the stip of their title match! And since he's contractually obligated to be a jackass, he threatens some people too. Now THAT'S the King we all know and silently curse behind his back.

 

Speaking of that King guy, Frost is talking with him. Plotting more malicious evil deeds....like rigging the "drawing" to put Frost just about at the end of the Rumble. Hmmm...that sneaky King.

 

And it's a King-free segment! Who approved this? Anyways, Tod deKindes, who gets no love from the SWF, picks up the W. Someone give this man a title shot....or maybe some half-price nachos.

 

Frost and ELM are talking now, and Frost is REASONABLY dealing with Mags. Now Frost, in the SWF Heel Handbook™, it most specifically says that you CANNOT compromise in any way whatsoever. I suggest you study harder.

 

Bo and X tangle, with X picking up the W via DQ, but Bo ends up walking out on top. More fuel to the HVT/Bo fire going into the Fuck. Should be good.

 

And now Danny and the rest of the M7 seem to have problems with the Frosty one. Man, this Frost guy is being nice to faces, getting helped by King, and bitched at by his heel stable. I swear, Lex Lugar and Stephanie McMahon don't make this many turns COMBINED.

 

Meanwhile, the SWF's other resident HOSS~!, the HVille Thugg, defeats Stryke in a (VERY) close match.

 

And in our main event, somebody wins, and a ruckus gets going. Read it and enjoy the six-man tag goodness.

 

And King should have hte card up soon. I'll be booking the first post-PPV show, so PM me with requests.

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